Nat Scatorccio's Paramore

just a girl who likes writing and reading an extreme amount of media! yellowjackets is my main fandom (nat fanfics found here pookies)

[riverrexd]

welcome *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ about me

name: river

pronouns: she/her

age: 19

fandoms: yellowjackets (main), Harry Potter (I hate JK), the hunger games, teen wolf, others!

music: pixies, hole, Joan Jett, mazzy star, Fiona Apple, the smashing pumpkins

other interests: fashion, thrifting, fanfics, poetry

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ about my blog

It may get hectic here because I plan to post: fanfics, misc. writing/art, photodumps, and just random thoughts! Enjoy the ride :)

Boundaries: everyone 16+ is welcome unless a fic/chapter states otherwise, no hate is tolerated here!

Fic requests welcome for any of my fandoms mentioned :)

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ fic master list

bubblegum and cigarettes - nat scatorccio x reader (intro, chap 1, chap 2)

[riverrexd]

should I do a bonus chapter of let the light in (my nat x reader fic)

Yes

No you’re dragging it

Remaining time: 18 hours 48 minutes

[riverrexd]

The criminal lack of Van Palmer fics makes me feel like I personally need to step up

[riverrexd]

Part two part two part twoo PLEASSEE

"𝖫𝖾𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖫𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝗂𝗇" 𝖯𝖺𝗋𝗍 2

𝖭𝖺𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗂𝖾 𝖲𝖼𝖺𝗍𝗈𝗋𝖼𝖼𝗂𝗈 𝗑 𝖿𝖾𝗆!𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋

𝖲𝗒𝗇𝗈𝗉𝗌𝖾𝗌: 𝖠𝖿𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗅𝖺𝗍𝖾 𝗇𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗄, 𝖭𝖺𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗂𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽𝗌𝗁𝗂𝗉 𝗍𝖺𝗄𝖾𝗌 𝖺 𝗍𝗎𝗋𝗇. 𝖡𝗎𝗍 𝗐𝗁𝗂𝗅𝖾 𝗁𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝗉𝗅𝖾𝗑𝗂𝗍𝗂𝖾𝗌 𝗈𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗋𝖾𝗅𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌𝗁𝗂𝗉, 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖽𝗂𝗌𝖼𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗋 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋𝗌𝖾𝗅𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗀𝖾𝗌 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗒𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀.

𝖠/𝖭: 𝖳𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗉𝗋𝗈𝖻𝖺𝖻𝗅𝗒 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝖻𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝗍𝗐𝗈 𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗍𝗌, 𝖻𝖾𝖼𝖺𝗎𝗌𝖾 𝗂𝗍'𝗌 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗅𝗈𝗇𝗀, 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝖨 𝗀𝗈𝗍 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝗈 𝗂𝗍 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝗈 𝖿𝗂𝗇𝗂𝗌𝗁 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗂𝗋 𝗌𝗍𝗈𝗋𝗒. 𝖨 𝗀𝗎𝖾𝗌𝗌 𝖨 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽𝖽𝖽𝖽 𝖽𝗈 𝖺 𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗍 3 𝗂𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗀𝗎𝗒𝗌 𝗁𝖺𝖽 𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝖨 𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗍 𝗂𝗌 𝗌𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗌𝖿𝗒𝗂𝗇𝗀! 𝖤𝗇𝗃𝗈𝗒 :) Disclaimer: reader is lesbian, but other sapphics or straights? (if you guys read this stuff) would still enjoy the story I think

You buckled your seatbelt and closed your eyes, preparing for the plane to take off. This was your first time flying, and you didn’t know what to expect, but you felt so grateful for Mr. Matthews for hooking you guys up with a private plane so you at least wouldn’t have to worry about a baby crying. Though you were anxious to fly, you were more excited to experience this for the first time. Surprisingly, once you were in the air, your worries disappeared. You were seated next to Javi, Coach Martinez’s son, who chatted with you more than you usually spoke with any of the girls. 

Everything went smoothly, until you began to feel the plane rattle. So this is what turbulence feels like, you thought, until you saw panic from the cock pit, and your heart dropped to your stomach. You felt Javi grab onto your hand. This was the first time you met each other, but fear has a weird way of uniting people, so you grabbed his hand back, not saying a word when he squeezed your hand so tight it hurt. The pain grounded you as you squeezed your eyes shut. If I die, at least I will die comforting someone, you thought, before praying to a God you didn’t know if you believed in. Then, there were screams, and everything went black. 

You opened your eyes to a sight straight out of a horror film. Your ears were ringing, preventing you from hearing the screams of the inflamed flight attendant. When you forced yourself to tear your eyes off the now dead roman, you turned to Javi and unclipped his seatbelt, dragging the two of you to the door of the plane to help the others push it open. 

After a while of fighting, your eyes were harassed by the sun’s light. Taking inventory of your surroundings, Javi began to shout for his dad, while you couldn’t help but search for Natalie. Your head shot in every direction, your heart rate speeding up as you lost your breath. You couldn’t find her. With the last bit of air you had in your lungs you shouted, “Natalie!”

—

You woke up in a pool of sweat, heart racing the same as it had in your dream. You turned around to see Natalie was no longer lying there, but the indent on her pillow gave you enough comfort to catch your breath. It was just a dream, you reminded yourself. But it wasn’t a dream. It was a memory. The kind of memory that sticks to you like gum on the bottom of your shoe, reminding you with every step that it is still there. 

You wiped your face with the blanket, hoping to hide the fact that you were profusely sweating, even though the rest of the team didn’t look so great themselves. By now, you were all clad with greasy hair and stained clothes, trying your best to survive, let alone look presentable. The only one who seemed to still put effort into their appearance was Jackie, who somehow never ran out of collared shirts. You giggled at this idea and pushed yourself out of bed, stepping outside to see everyone already awake and dressed. You felt embarrassed to have been the only one still sleeping.

“Why didn’t anyone wake me?” You asked, while rubbing your eyes, still a bit groggy from the night of sleep you’d had. 

“Natalie told us not to,” Shauna explained, eyes shut as Jackie braided her hair. 

This caused Jackie to scoff and chime in, “Yeah, she probably just didn’t wanna bicker with you so early in the morning.”

You forced yourself to scoff while you replayed the events of last night, cheeks slightly flushing. Jackie was probably right, but part of you wants to believe she cared about you enough to want you to enjoy the rare time you were able to rest through the night. You dragged yourself out of your thoughts long enough to notice Nat wasn’t in sight. You kicked a rock on the deck of the cabin and nonchalantly asked, “Speak of the devil, where is she?”

Van, who you didn’t notice was tuned into the conversation this whole time, grinned and answered, “she’s by the lake.”

Her grin made you feel uneasy, so you awkwardly mumbled “thanks” and went back inside. 

You sat on the ground and thought about what you should do now. Everyone was just getting used to the cabin, so people were mostly just hanging around, trying to find some sort of normalcy. They were chatting on logs, braiding each other's hair, and otherwise acting like normal, or as normal as you can possibly be in this situation, teenage girls. Since you didn’t exactly thrive when you were a “normal” teenage girl, this left you feeling alone, just like you had the last three years. 

Remembering how sweaty you were last night, you mustered the courage to sniff yourself, only to find you were definitely facing the hygienic impacts of your nightmare. Because of that, you decided you should go to the lake, for completely not Natalie related reasons, and rinse off. For some reason, you found yourself picking out the cutest matching underwear set you packed, which still wasn’t much, considering you were just going to a soccer game. You told yourself the matching pink set was just so you would feel more confident taking your clothes off to swim, and put the set on under your t-shirt and shorts. 

When you made it to the lake, you saw Natalie floating on her back, and decided to sit for a bit before rinsing off. You watched the clouds moving in the sky, and thought that it was actually cool that the team had the whole lake to themselves, despite the unfortunate circumstances. You caught yourself catching glimpses at Natalie, who looked so peaceful floating there alone. Looking around, you noticed that it was just the two of you by the lake, which made you even more sweaty for some reason. 

Remembering that you were still supposed to be mad at Natalie for how she treated you, you pried your eyes away and lied on your back, admiring the blue sky and the birds that inhabited it. How easy would it be to just be able to fly out of here?, you thought, before feeling a drop of water land on your forehead. 

You wiped the water away, groaning at the realization that it must have started to rain, before opening your eyes to see Natalie standing above you, looking down at you. 

She bursted out into a belly laugh, one that you haven’t heard from her in a while, and asked, “you just gonna lay there or you gonna come swim with me?”

Your face warped into one of confusion at how abnormally, or normally you guessed, she was acting. Just yesterday you hated each other, and now she wanted to swim with you? She did apologize to you, but does that just erase the last three years of avoidance, bickering, and hurt? Was this going to end well for you? Did you care about how it was going to end? 

Nat interrupted your thoughts by shouting “race you to the water,” and sprinting back towards the lake. 

She got a few strides of a head start before something prompted you to push yourself up and to follow suit. You weren’t sure if you were running towards the lake, or to her. Was this muscle memory of all the times she raced you home from the playground, or was this something new, something unexplored?

None of those things mattered when the cold water sent a shock through your body, forcing a squeal out of you that was so high, you didn’t even know you could produce a sound like it. 

Natalie laughed before teasing, “what, are you cold?” and sending a tsunami of water your way.

You squealed again, this time more like an angry hamster, and splashed her back, before deciding that wasn’t enough revenge, and pushing down on her shoulders, jumping to get enough leverage to send her fully under the water. You didn’t care if you went down with her, it just brought you happiness to see the smug look wiped off her face.

—

You weren’t sure how much time had passed, the two of you floating on your backs in the water silently, until you saw the familiar orange hues of a sunset painting the sky. You knew you should go back to the cabin, and were honestly surprised nobody had looked for you, but you were scared. Scared that after this, things would go back to how they were before, and that this was a spur of the moment thing for Natalie, not something that would infiltrate her thoughts before bed like it would surely do yours. 

You ignored the pruning of your fingers, and turned to Nat. The glow of the sky made her appear golden, and the curve of her nose begged you to stare at it in awe. Your stomach twisted in a way that you knew you’d never be able to describe to anyone, at least not in the way that the girls in the cabin talk about their feelings. It was beautiful and disgusting, a secret that begged to be told. You jerked your head, so you were no longer looking at her, right at the moment Natalie decided to turn to you. 

“Hey,” she spoke softly, in that melodic way she always did. “We should probably go back soon.”

Normally, when you spoke to people, you thought way too much about how to respond, drawing out every possible turn the conversation could take before answering. Even ordering at a restaurant usually prompted some sort of internal rehearsal from you. But for some reason, maybe because of the look of the moon, or how it reflected off of Nat’s eyes, you didn’t think at all before saying, “no.” It came out more childish and tantrum-like than you’d care to admit, like how you would respond when your dad called you back inside after a long play-session with Nat. 

Nat chuckled, thinking you were joking, until she noticed you weren’t moving, and asked, “why not?”

This made you realize what you had said, and how you’d have to come up with a way to backtrack. You could say you were joking, or that you just wanted to stay a few minutes longer to clean your clothes. After thinking of different scenarios, something struck you. It hit you like  a train, the realization that you had spent so much of your life hiding your feelings from Nat, and worrying what she, or anyone for that matter, would have to think. You stood up in the water, causing Natalie’s face to grow concerned as she followed your lead. 

“I know you, Nat,” you started, “and I know that as soon as we go back there, in front of everyone, things will go right back to how they’ve been. And-” you stuttered, before regaining your bravery, “I’m just not ready for that yet. So please, just stay here a bit longer with me.” It came out like a plea, raw and pathetic, but you didn’t care, you needed Nat to know you still cared about your friendship, even if it was only real when the two of you were alone. 

Nat frowned, and traced her finger across the water, seemingly contemplating a response. She looked up at you and began to speak in a low voice, “I guess I was kind of planning on that.”

You rolled your eyes, upset at yourself for thinking this conversation would end in any way other than the inevitable, and began to turn around. You barely got one step in when you felt Nat’s fingers wrap around your wrist, pulling you, almost aggressively, to face her.

“Just listen to me,” Nat almost desperately commanded, while running her hands through her hair, like she did that day three years ago. This time it was different. She seemed to be fighting with her own thoughts, rather than with you. You patiently watched her pace a bit, back and forth, before speaking again, “remember how I said I was scared of losing you, and that’s why I decided to just cut you off on my own?” You nodded, prompting Nat to continue, “well, I guess I still feel that way. The plane crash was just a reminder of how fucked this world is.” She stopped speaking, but you could tell she had more to say, and was deciding on if she should. Ultimately, she didn’t hold back, and shyly admitted, “the day of the crash, even though we were still on bad terms, the first person I looked for was you, and the fucking panic I felt when I couldn’t find you, I couldn’t live with it if I felt it every day.”

Your heart just about exploded. It was equally comforting, and frustrating, to hear that Natalie was looking for you, the same as you were for her. But why then, did she still not talk to you? And why, even today, was she planning on going back to avoiding you in front of others? You decided to ask her those same questions.

Nat continued to stare at the apparently very interesting ripple in the lake while she thought of how to answer. “I guess,” she started, “me ignoring you was my way of convincing myself I don’t care, so that if anything happens, it will hurt less? And even though I want so fucking badly for this,” she jestured between the two of you before continuing, “to be our normal again, going in front of people makes it seem real, I guess. Like I’ll actually have you, and if I lose you, I’ll have nothing else.”

If you thought you were in disbelief after last night’s conversation, this takes the cake. Natalie really did want to be friends with you again, and her saying she “has you” made your heart burn in a way you didn’t want to unpack, but she still didn’t want to act like friends in front of everyone else, while you wanted to shout it out to the rooftops. Eventually, you decided that having her a little bit is better than not at all, and replied with a simple, “okay.”

Nat seemed relieved, but then confused, and asked, “okay, what?”

You smiled and responded, “we can keep our friendship just between us, for now, until you realize I’m not going anywhere.” 

Natalie smiled from ear to ear, relieved at your understanding. After all those years of her reassuring you that she wasn’t going anywhere, she finally understood how important that feeling is, prompting her to bear hug you.

You coughed out an exaggerated, “you’re squeezing me,” and blushed as Nat pulled away. “This was a great chat, but we really should head back, ‘enemy,’” you teased. 

Natalie smiled and followed you out of the lake. 

—

Back at the cabin, Nat explained to the girls how she left the lake hours ago, and how weird it was that you were there all day by yourself. You rolled your eyes, as you dried your hair with a towel, unable to hide your smile as you listened to the excuses Nat came up with. She had always been the better liar between the two of you. Whenever you got in trouble, she’d be the one to come up with some sort of story that could justify your actions. “No, we didn’t play in the mud! A car drove past us and splashed the muddy water onto us,” or “That wasn’t us being loud at midnight, it was the kids next door!” It was funny to see how that still reigned true almost thirteen years later. 

“What were you doing alone at the lake?” Travis asked over his shoulder, walking into his room for the night.

“Don’t be a perv Travis,” Jackie teased, while she brushed out her hair.

Travis rolled his eyes, finally entering his room, and you breathed a sigh of relief at Jackie for saving you from having to answer his question. 

They dropped the issue after that, as you all climbed underneath your blankets with your designated “sleep buddies,” as Misty coined it, creepy but effective. You waited until it seemed like everyone was asleep before turning to Nat, who was already looking at you. 

“Alone at last,” she joked, making you blush, for no reason at all. 

“Finally,” you agreed, “though it’s kind of fun to play pretend in front of people.”

Nat smiled, and then grew serious, “thank you for being so cool about this. I know it’s kind of dumb but,” she paused, “I got a lot of shit to unpack, and it’s just easier this way, for now.”

You sent her a reassuring smile before affirming, “it’s a hell of a lot better than how it’s been the past three years, Nat.”

Nat chuckled, before her eyes became weirdly focussed on your forehead. Your face scrunched in confusion, until you felt Nat brushing a hair away from your eyes, like it was nothing. It was nothing. 

The flush of your face was enough to make you turn around and quickly say “well, time to sleep.”

Nat scootched a bit closer to you, and asked, “do you need me to, ya know, help you?”

You squeezed your eyes shut. The answer was yes, you did need it. But the way just the brush of her fingertips against your forehead affected you made you feel dirty, like allowing her to cuddle you tonight would be taking advantage of her, so you lied and said “I’m good,” and pretended to sleep, tossing and turning as soon as you heard Nat start to snore beside you.

—

The next few weeks went about the same, except Nat had started hunting with Travis, leaving most of your alone time at the lake, or in bed at night. You got used to the feelings she gave you when she touched you, and started to ignore them whenever you could, hoping it would make them go away. 

One day, the two of you sat by the lake, as orange leaves flew past you. You coddled yourself from the harsh breeze of the wind. Nat noticed and offered you her flannel, and you ignored the urge to say yes. You contemplated bringing up something that had concerned you for a while, but decided it was for the best.

“Hey Nat,” you got her attention, “can I talk to you about something?”

Nat turned her whole body towards you, showing you her utmost attention. “Of course you can,” she replied, sweetly. 

You looked around at the trees around you, some of them clad with warm colors, but many of them already bald. “It’s getting colder, so we won’t be able to get away with the lake excuse anymore,” you gently approached the conversation, “I don’t think we will be able to have as much alone time.”

Nat looked down, and began playing with the sand beneath her. “I’ve thought of that too,” she agreed.

“So,” you began, planning how you want to phrase this, “do you think it’s time we just tell people we are friends again?”

Nat’s eyes shot up to look at you, she looked like she was about to get angry, when her face softened, and she sighed. “Can I be honest?” She asked. 

“That would be optimal,” you joked, pushing her leg playfully. 

She smiled bashfully and began to speak, “at first, keeping our friendship secret was about protecting me. Like, people finding out would make it a big thing, that would end one day.” You nodded, and the soft look in your eyes gave her the confidence to continue, “but now, I feel like it’s about protecting us. I don’t know why but what we have is stronger than anything I’ve felt before, but somehow feels so delicate that I don’t want to share it. Does that make sense? Fuck that’s so cheesy just forget-” you interupted Nat’s overthinking by grabbing her leg gently. 

“I get it Nat,” you began. You had always felt like what you had with Nat was more than a friendship, and even if that is not what she’s saying, you still related to her feelings. Somehow, even though you were just then rebuilding the years of friendship you had lost, the feeling felt even stronger than it ever had, and you felt scared. You tried to explain it in a way that doesn’t make you sound crazy and began, “sometimes you just have to do scary shit, Nat. I’m scared too, but it’s not fair to us to have to pretend to be something we’re not,” you weren’t sure what you were referring to in that last part, but it felt right. 

Nat nodded, and put her hand on where yours was resting on her leg. “So it’s settled,” she smiled, “we will tell people tonight.”

—

Telling everyone was different from what you expected. In your mind you thought it would be this big movie moment where everyone was shocked and asked you how it happened, but while people were surprised, with the weather getting colder people were more focussed on preparing than what your friendship status was. 

A few weeks after that day at the lake, Nat and you sat on the deck, cleaning the gun. Everyone else was inside changing, so you figured you’d take the chance to have time alone. Even though people knew you were friends, the two of you still had an unspoken agreement that you needed time with just the two of you, to talk, or just to enjoy each other's company. You stared at Nat’s concentrated face, just like the one she had when she used to paint your nails, and giggled. 

“What’s so funny,” the blonde teased, not looking away from the rifle. 

You giggled again before explaining, “it’s just funny how everything changed. We used to have sleepovers, and paint each other's nails, now we are stuck in the woods together, cleaning a gun.”

Nat laughed with you in agreement, before saying “I wish I could have been there for you through all those years. All the drama, the boys-” 

You interrupted her with a laugh, causing her to finally look up from her rifle and quirk a brow at you. 

“Sorry it’s just,” you laugh, “there weren’t really any boys in the picture for me.”

Nat nearly dropped the gun as she asked “WHAT?”

You looked at her with a confused face, wondering why that was so shocking for her. You never even really had friends after you stopped hanging out, and it seemed a hell of a lot harder to connect with guys than it was with girls. 

“Sorry it’s just,” Nat began, in a less shocked tone, “I mean not to be morbid but, we could die out here, and you never got with a guy?” She asked.

“Gee thanks for the reminder, Nat,” you teased, while looking down at your feet and thinking. Somehow, that statement didn’t really hurt you. The thought of kissing a boy, and doing more, never appealed to you. Honestly, it had the opposite effect on you than the one it seemed to have on other girls your age. The only time you ever really felt butterflies was when you were with Nat- Oh. You always had a feeling that there was something different about you. Something you could never place your finger on. But at that moment, it seemed so obvious. All of the unnecessarily long glimpses, the blushing, the heart racing, you had feelings for Nat.

 Your heart dropped at the thought, and a wave of panic shot through you. There was no way you could tell Nat, but could you really keep a secret from her? Would she even care? You remembered her asking you, “are you like, a lesbian?” And now that you knew the answer, the question seemed like even more of an attack. 

Nat noticed your despair, and grabbed your leg, causing you to flinch. “Listen, I’m sorry I brought it up. I’m sure we're not gonna die-”

“Yeah, whatever,” you interrupted, “I’m gonna go to bed now.”

Nat watched you leave, feeling horrible for reminding you of all the things you missed out on, and decided to leave you be.

—

Later that night, you felt Nat lay onto the ground beside you, and fought the urge to ask where she had been. You felt her get closer to you, causing your breath to hitch before you scooted away. 

“I know you’re awake,” she whispered. 

You ignored her, causing her to forcibly turn you around. Before you could say anything, she stood up, and practically dragged you up beside her, and out the door. “We are going for a walk,” she whisper-yelled, leaving you with no choice. 

Once you got outside, you had a bit more freedom to speak above a whisper. “This is ridiculous Nat! Let’s go back inside,” you argued.

“No, what’s ridiculous is you ignoring me over a mistake,” she replied. 

“Oh does that sound familiar?” You questioned her, annoyance in your tone.

Nat frowned and stepped closer to you. “Seriously,” she started sadly, “talk to me.”

Your face softened. You hated seeing her upset, especially at something you did, but you didn’t know how to word it, so you just started speaking, “I wasn’t- I’m not mad at you, Nat.”

“Then why-” Nat started to question, before you continued.

“You’re right. I never got with a boy, and probably never will, because I think-” you choked up, terrified of what will happen after you say the next part. 

A look of understanding washed across Nat’s face, and she took another step closer to you, nodding for you to continue. 

“I think I’m a lesbian,” you muttered, ready to run away, and never look back. “And I understand if you don’t want to be friends anymore. I promise I-” 

Before you could finish your sentence, you felt Nat’s lips crashing against yours, aggressively unsure. It lasted for a few pleasant, but confusing, moments before she pulled away. 

“Oh my God,” she said while beginning her usual nervous pace. “I don’t know why I did that, I’m so fucking-”

It was Nat’s turn to be interrupted, as you leaned in to kiss her, stopping her from spiraling even more. You both stepped closer to the other, and Nat placed a hand on your hip, as yours went up to the back of her neck, to feel her soft blonde hairs. This kiss was different, it grew more sure of itself the longer it went on. It was tender, loving, and unafraid. When the two of you finally pulled away, you just looked at each other. 

“Holy shit,” you both said at once, causing you to interrupt into a laugh. 

The two of you managed to sit down on the deck, knowing you should probably talk, but not knowing how to start. 

“So does this mean we are like girlfriends?” Nat asked. 

You cringed, the term sounded so foreign and official, but somehow good at the same time. “I don’t think so,” you started, but quickly clarified when you saw Nat begin to frown a bit, “I mean, one day we could be? But I don’t think we have ever been good at defined boxes,” you reasoned. 

Nat smiled and said, “you’re right. I guess for now, we are just friends who really like each other and also kiss sometimes?” She looked down, like something was missing from her statement. “And who also don’t kiss other people?” she added, shyly.

You playfully rolled your eyes and joked, “well there goes all my plans.”

The two of you walked quietly back inside, and got into your usual positions. Nat pulled you in to cuddle, like usual, but this time it felt different. You weren’t just cuddling because you needed it to feel safe, you were cuddling because you could finally admit that the touches the two of you shared throughout your whole lives have always meant more than “friends.”

𝖳𝖧𝖠𝖭𝖪 𝖸𝖮𝖴 𝖥𝖮𝖱 𝖲𝖴𝖯𝖯𝖮𝖱𝖳𝖨𝖭𝖦 𝖬𝖤! 𝖨𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗆𝖺𝖽𝖾 𝗂𝗍 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖾𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗅𝗈𝗇𝗀 𝖺𝗁 𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎'𝗋𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖻𝖾𝗌𝗍 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖨'𝖽 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝖻𝖾 𝗆𝗎𝗍𝗎𝖺𝗅𝗌 𝖺𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗉𝗈𝗂𝗇𝗍. 𝖯𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗌𝖾 𝗅𝗆𝗄 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗄 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖺𝗌 𝖺𝗅𝗐𝖺𝗒𝗌 𝖿𝖾𝖾𝗅 𝖿𝗋𝖾𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝗇𝗈𝗍𝖾𝗌 𝗂𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗇𝖺 𝗌𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝗌𝗎𝗉𝗉𝗈𝗋𝗍 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗁𝖾𝗅𝗉 𝗆𝖾 𝗄𝗇𝗈𝗐 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗄𝗌.

tags: @brightnessluvworld

[jackietaylorsghost]

this genuinely has me in tears

[riverrexd]

"𝖫𝖾𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖫𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝗂𝗇"

𝖭𝖺𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗂𝖾 𝖲𝖼𝖺𝗍𝗈𝗋𝖼𝖼𝗂𝗈 𝗑 𝖥𝖾𝗆𝖺𝗅𝖾!𝖱𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋

PART 2 OUT NOW

𝖲𝗒𝗇𝗈𝗉𝗌𝗂𝗌: 𝖸𝗈𝗎 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖭𝖺𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗂𝖾 𝗐𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝖼𝗁𝗂𝗅𝖽𝗁𝗈𝗈𝖽 𝖻𝖾𝗌𝗍 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽𝗌, 𝗎𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗅 𝖺𝖿𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖽𝖺𝖽 𝖽𝗂𝖾𝖽, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗁𝖺𝖽 𝖺 𝖿𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗎𝗍. 𝖶𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗂𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝖽𝖾𝗋𝗇𝖾𝗌𝗌, 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗀𝖾𝗍 𝖺𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗀𝗇𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝗁𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝖺 𝖻𝗅𝖺𝗇𝗄𝖾𝗍 𝖽𝗎𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗇𝖾𝗂𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗈𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗌𝗍𝗋𝗈𝗇𝗀 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗇𝖾𝖼𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖾𝗂𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗈𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗀𝗂𝗋𝗅𝗌 𝗈𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗍𝖾𝖺𝗆.

You looked around at your new “home,” a grungy street lined with boxy trailers at different stages of deterioration, as your dad walked a five-year old you into a dingy yellow single-wide. 

“It’s not much, but it's our’s,” your dad reassured, hoping you couldn’t read his disappointment at the luxury he has failed to give you. 

You silently let go of your dad’s hand and explored the home, turning around each corner like you were scared something would come out and bite you. It didn’t take you long to find the bedroom that housed boxes labeled with your name, and a naked twin bed pushed against the wall. 

You climbed your little body onto the bed and laid on your back, until you heard your dad shout out, “why don’t you go outside sweetie? The neighborhood kids are playing!”

You remained silent, but obeyed your dad, tying your pink converse and shyly stepping outside. Across the street there were boys chasing each other, girls playing hopscotch, and two ladies smoking cigarettes in their plastic adirondack chairs. What drew your attention the most was a girl your age squatting alone, poking at something on the ground. You stared at her, nervous to approach, until she looked up and shot you a wide tooth grin, with her front tooth missing. 

That goofy grin gave you the confidence to tiptoe over to her and ask, “what are you looking at?”

Her smile only widened as she proudly pointed to the frog in front of her. You giggled, and kneeled down right beside her.

—

The night before sixth grade, your parents had somehow agreed for you and Nat to have a sleepover. You sat across from her, fiddling with the CD player with your left hand while she painted the fingernails on your right. 

“This color looks good on you,” she said, with her face concentrated as she tried not to get any “plum purple” on your skin.

You blushed and thanked her, scanning the nail polish options for the color you thought would look best on her. You really thought all of them would look great, but ended up landing on “candy apple red.”

That night you wore your matching pajamas, that you had saved up all your lunch money to buy, and climbed into bed. As you closed your eyes, you hoped that you would be able to fall asleep tonight. Starting when you moved into the trailer with your dad, falling asleep became an issue for you. You’d close your eyes, but your mind would race with different questions and scenarios, until you’d notice the sun was up and you’d have to start the day. Usually, after a few nights you’d be so exhausted that your body would manage a couple hours at least, but that night, laying next to Natalie, you just couldn’t shake the thoughts of losing the people most important to you. 

When having your eyes shut became boring, you decided to open them, and look at Natalie, who seemed to be sleeping peacefully. It comforted you to know that she was right there next to you, and that she wasn’t going anywhere, at least for the night. In the middle of that thought, her eyes slowly opened, and she noticed you looking at her. 

She shot you a sheepish grin and asked, “why aren’t you sleeping?”

You questioned whether or not you should be honest, or if you should give her the quick and easy answer. Not wanting to keep your best friend up on a school night, you went with the ladder. “Just nervous for tomorrow I guess.”

Nat seemed to become fully awake, and she sat up in bed. She looked you directly in the eyes, like she was giving you another chance to be honest, before stating kindly, “you’ve never been a good liar. What’s really wrong?”

You picked at the lint balls on your sheet and avoided eye contact while you explained everything, the sleepless nights, the fears of losing the people you love, the days at school where you felt like a zombie because you hadn’t slept in forty eight hours. 

Nat just looked at you, you began to feel worried that she would say it was dumb, and then she hugged you, tight. “I’m not going to sleep until I know you aren’t awake, and if it takes me strangling you to show you that I’m not going anywhere, then strangle you I shall," she joked, through a strained voice. 

You giggled and replied, fighting for air, “that’s awesome Nat, but if you don’t loosen your grip a bit I will be sleeping permanently.”

The two of you giggled, but she wasn’t joking. She held you in her arms until you drifted off to sleep, for the first time in days. Though your problems weren’t magically solved, after that, things got a lot better. Whenever your mind would race you’d think of the two of you laying like that, and if you still couldn’t sleep, you’d call her to come over, and she always would. 

— 

Three years later, the two of you are lying in that same twin bed Natalie comforted you in. Except now, it is dressed nicely in purple sheets, and is filled with a potentially embarrassing number of stuffed animals for a fourteen year old to have.

Natalie scooped up one named “Brownie the Bunny”, as she turned onto her side and sighed, “I can’t believe we are going into high school soon.”

“I know right,” you giggled, “it feels like just yesterday we were playing with frogs in front of my trailer.”

Nat laughed and then grew serious. “I hope nothing changes too much,” she said in a low voice, while looking up at you.

You sighed, “I’m sure a lot will change Nat. But never us, okay?”

This made Natalie smile, and turn back onto her back to toss Brownie up and down as she quickly changed the subject to some new band she’s been listening to. You just looked at her, not really listening, feeling hopeful for the next four years together. 

—

Your promise reigned true for the first few months of freshman year, until Nat’s dad died. This set off a whirl wind that even your years of friendship wasn’t immune to. She started hanging out with her guy friends instead of you, and drinking way more than you’d ever seen her do before. Whenever you would show up to her place, there was always some excuse why you couldn’t hang out. Until one day, Vera got to the door before Nat, and since she never really cared about anything anyways, she let you in without question. 

You gently knocked on the door to Nat’s room, which you had done so many times before. When she opened the door to see you, her face dropped. “What are you doing here?” She asked, almost annoyed. 

“I just miss you Nat. We haven’t hung out in weeks,” you explained, upset that it wasn’t obvious to her.

“Yeah well, I’ve been busy,” she used as her excuse. 

“You never used to be too busy for me,” you almost whispered.

Natalie pulled the door shut as you stepped further inside her room, changing places with her. She ran her hands through her hair and saif “god, why can’t you accept that things change?”

Your heart broke a little, and you remembered your agreement. Did that not matter to her? “Weren’t you the one who was saying how you hoped things didn’t change?” You asked her, trying to fight the urge to cry.

“Well, I was naive then, and sometimes wishes aren’t enough. Sometimes shit just happens to you,” she harshly argued. 

You began to understand she was talking about her dad, which made you angry because you felt like you should be the one that she turned to, not Kevyn. “Yeah, sometimes they do Nat. But that’s not my fault! I mean it isn’t my fault your dad died-” you exclaimed, without thinking.

“What and it’s mine?” She yelled.

“God-” you realized what you insinuated and continued, “no. You know I didn’t mean that.”

“You know what?” she spat,  “Save it. Because honestly I’m tired of you chasing me down anyways. Like are you lesbian or something? Just learn to take a hint and leave me alone!” 

Your stomach dropped. This whole time you thought she had been distancing herself because of things going on in her life. You never thought it had anything to do with you as a person. You stared down at your feet and quietly stated, “you won’t have to worry about that anymore,” before turning and leaving.

—

Ever since that day your life has been completely different. Natalie was practically your only friend, so you started spending your time alone. Occasionally you would hang out with girls from school, but you never really clicked with them. You had gone from feeling bad about your dad’s loneliness, to him feeling bad about yours, so he would randomly ask if you wanted to come to work with him when he did weekend overtime. 

The only thing that was the same was that you were still on the soccer team. When you were still friends with Nat, she forced you to join the team with her, and even after you guys fell out, you couldn’t bring yourself to quit. The girls on the team were nice, but you barely spoke to them unless you were on the field, because it just didn’t feel right. In your mind, they belonged to Nat, even though they weren’t exactly buddy buddy with her either. 

Natalie usually completely avoided you, but when you did talk, it was either the minimal communication needed to effectively win a game, or bickering. Somehow though, the two of you managed to cooperate enough for the team to win states. 

You thought your life couldn’t get more fucked up, until your plane crashed on the way to nationals. 

—

When you found the cabin, things started to look up. It wasn't exactly a Hilton resort, but at least you wouldn’t be sleeping outside again. That was a positive, until it came to arranging the sleeping situations. 

“Okay, so that leaves me sleeping with Shauna, Van sleeping with Tai, Lottie sleeping with Mari, and-” Jackie looked up at her remaining teammates, “you two sleeping together,” she motioned towards you and Nat. With the limited amount of blankets, two people had to share, and since Nat and you weren’t exactly the social butterflies of the team, you were defaulted together. 

You began to sit down on your blanket when Nat spoke, “really? I mean, where is Misty gonna sleep?”

You rolled your eyes at how she acted like you would give her the plague if she slept next you and replied, “she refuses to sleep anywhere besides next to Coach. Now stop being a baby and sit down.” 

Natalie looked around, as if trying to find an argument, before rolling her eyes and sitting next to you on the blanket, dramatically putting her back to you. You rolled your eyes again, and laid on your side, back facing Nat. She stayed in her position for a bit, before mirroring you. 

—

Later that night, when everyone else was sleeping, you stared at the ceiling, like you had almost every night since the fight. It seemed like all of the progress you had made went out the window the day that you left Natalie’s house. Instead of replaying the memory of her cuddling you to sleep, you’d replay her asking “Like are you lesbian or something?,” wondering what the right answer is. 

You laid there for fifteen more minutes before you felt movement beside you, which prompted you to turn over and see Nat propped up on her elbow.

 “God, can you go to sleep? Your awakeness is making me wake up,” she complained. 

You just sighed, “I would if I could Natalie.”

The blonde’s expression softened, “you still have trouble sleeping?” She asked, showing more interest in you than she had for the last three years.

“Yep, don’t exactly have therapy money,” you replied dryly, causing Nat to chuckle.

“Oh really? I know this really good one. Her name is Mary Jane. She’s kinda pricey but I highly recommend,” she replied, causing you both to laugh, before realizing you may wake the others and putting hands over your mouths to shush yourselves. 

Your quiet giggles reminded you of all those nights you spent together, stealing your parents VHS tapes of movies you were too young to be watching, playing MASH, listening to music and talking about which member of the band you’d wanna be with the most. It almost didn’t make sense how you were the same two people now as you were then.

As your laugh faded out, your face dropped as you asked, “how did everything get so fucked up?”

Natalie looked back up at the ceiling, thinking of how to answer. If she was going to be honest, she didn’t really know herself, so she came up with the best excuse she could,  “my dad died, and I became a bitch.”

You giggled at her bluntness and then realized that her answer didn’t satisfy you. Through a frown you questioned, “but you’re not a bitch. I see you with your other friends, so why me? What did I do?”

Nat frowned, and stayed silent. You almost turned back around, thinking she wasn’t going to answer, when she muttered quietly, “you just cared so much, and I guess I kind of thought I was going to lose you eventually. I figured it would be better if it happened on my own terms. It’s stupid, and I shouldn’t have said all that dumb, untrue shit that night.”

Your jaw dropped. You weren’t expecting to ever get an explanation for why your friendship ended. You weren’t sure if you even wanted to know. Your eyes landed back on that familiar spot on the ceiling as you relived the night your friendship ended. How she acted like you were some stalker following her around, and like she didn’t even care about all those memories you had made together. It still stung, but hearing her explanation made it seem like she was just damaged, just like you, and that to her it was just painful means to an end. 

You cleared your throat and convinced yourself to ask the question you were dreading the answer to, “did you really feel that way about me though?” You paused for a second and whispered, “you can be honest.”

Nat frowned. She realized that what she said actually did more damage than she had intended. “Of course I didn’t,” she reassured. “I was the one shutting you out, you did nothing wrong.” She felt nervous to say the next part, but did it anyways, “and if you actually were like a lesbian, that’s not bad or anything.”

You fought the urge to get defensive, and instead just nodded. “I’m still mad at you ya’known,” you expressed, trying not to laugh.

“I wouldn’t expect anything less,” she smiled. She had a look on her face like she was thinking something she shouldn’t be, and she took a look around the room, almost as if she was checking if anyone was listening. “Listen,” she started quietly, “if you really can’t sleep, I can help you.”

Your face flushed a bit, and you wanted to hold your ground, to protest, but you really did need to sleep. You figured the next day wasn’t going to be all rest and relaxation, so you turned around on your side, and quiety said “okay.”

You felt nat scooting closer to you, and her arms wrapping around your waist like they had so many times before. You ignored the goosebumps you got when she whispered, “don’t you dare tell anyone about this,” and then drifted off to sleep. 

𝖠/𝖭: 𝖳𝗋𝗒𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗆𝗒 𝗁𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖺𝗍 𝖺 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝗌𝗁𝗈𝗍 𝗂𝗇 𝖻𝖾𝗍𝗐𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗌 𝗈𝖿 𝖡&𝖢! 𝖨𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝖼𝗁𝖾𝖼𝗄 𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗆𝗒 𝗆𝖺𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗆𝗒 𝗅𝗈𝗇𝗀 𝖿𝗂𝖼 𝖨'𝗆 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗇 𝗈𝗋 𝗅𝖾𝗍 𝗆𝖾 𝗄𝗇𝗈𝗐 𝗂𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍 𝖺 𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗍 2! 𝖭𝗈𝗍𝖾𝗌 𝗀𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗍𝗅𝗒 𝖺𝗉𝗉𝗋𝖾𝖼𝗂𝖺𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗂𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾𝖽 𝗂𝗍 :)

[virgoactias]

‘van is a wolf this’ ‘van is a wolf that’ no, you are all wrong. van will forever be a silly orange cat.

the resemblance is uncanny

[thatssodeer]

Phoebe Bridgers ‘lost boys’ is so Yellowjackets coded

[riverrexd]

taivan is genuinely my everything

[riverrexd]

omg where it all started 😭

[rhiannonsknife]

STREAMER GIRLFRIEND NAT ── SMAU .ᐟ

» nat scatorccio x fem!streamer!reader.

synopsis:

you’re a streamer, living with- and also dating nat → based on this request.

— warnings: modern social media au + some little blurbs. mostly just fluff. some nsfw content. mdni. also ignore the time stamps + any inconsistencies in chat.

♯1 ─ chat spots nat in the background.

smiling, you watch as the first messages of today’s stream appear on screen, the chat picking up speed as more viewers join in. lately, your streams have started gaining quite some traction, and so you try not to pay the already high, but exponentially increasing number any mind and decide to focus on the more familiar names instead. it isn’t all that surprising that van is among your first viewers, bringing up the topic of natalie right from the start, as if you hadn’t just talked to her about it face to face the other day. with the amount of followers you’ve been gaining, you decided it would be for the best to keep some of your personal life private, but neither chat nor your real life friends seem to have gotten the message yet, given that your ‘secret girlfriend’ has become one of your viewers’ favorite topics to discuss. “vandyke69,” you start, grimacing at the username, “we’ve talked about that before.”

thank god for your mods, jumping in when more messages pop up. as annoying as van’s stupid attempts are to steer the conversation towards nat, worse is only the user going by the name pitgirl.mi, whose messages you’ve been noticing for quite some time now: her mostly harmless teasing (at least you assume that’s what is it, because she’s never once missed one of your streams, so some part of her must enjoy watching you) never outright goes against the guidelines, but it’s never anything you’d deem nice, either. “and thanks for the donation, antlerqueen!” you say instead, ignoring that.

behind you, you hear nat shuffle under the blanket where she’s been hiding on your bed, making a face at the loud crinkling sound it causes. you can just hope your microphone won’t pick up on it, because you’d only agreed to let her hide in the background of your stream so long as she doesn’t draw any attention to herself. in hindsight, that was a really fucking stupid idea, but nat wanted to spend more time with you, and who are you to turn her down? “i’ll show you ‘the woman’ once you guys learn how to behave,” you lean in extra close to the mic to cover the rustling as your eyes scan over another message.

“uh....” glancing over your shoulder, you blush at that user’s observation. there goes your plan to keep this discreet. “that’s my- my pillow, chat!” you fake a cough right into the microphone when you hear nat’s muffled attempt to hold back her giggles upon hearing that, and quickly add: “anyway, we’re not here for that!”

♯2 ─ nat’s first ever voice reveal.

nat stands just out of frame on the day she agrees to speak to your viewers for the first time. to be fair, it’s more you who had to agree: she’d been begging nonstop to be featured in one of your streams until you finally relented and let her have this. starting with a simple voice reveal seemed like a good compromise for both of you, so here she is, the mic angled in her direction, leaning forward whilst still making sure she stays out of your viewers’ sight. you keep your eyes fixed on the screen all the while, ready to yank the camera away, in case nat accidentally leans too far in as she rasps: “hi chat.”

from the corner of your vision, you watch nat read through the absolute flood of incoming comments & reactions, a grin forming on her lips the longer she watches chat. “vip knows nothing,” you quickly pull the microphone toward yourself again and roll back into position in your chair. “but vandyke’s right, she is nice, guys.” beside you, nat chuckles, not quiet enough for the sound not to get picked up by the microphone. you still shoot her a playful glare, but by then it’s too late already.

♯3 ─ nat’s face reveal.

not long after the voice reveal stream, during which nat had ended up engaging with your viewers a lot, she agrees to do an actual, proper face reveal. that first time on stream has seemingly gotten her excited, and between the voice reveal & the day she decides to show her face, the two of you spent plenty of time talking it through before eventually agreeing to do it without much of an announcement or ‘build up’ beforehand. your chat reacts accordingly when people begin joining the stream, expecting nothing out of the ordinary, only to find both you and nat sitting in your usual setup, watching new messages come in. “fuck...” nat murmurs, smiling at the screen in amazement.

you grin too (despite the nerves of revealing yet another part of your private life to your ever growing audience), if only because of van’s reaction. you knew telling her about your account would result in her watching some of your streams just out of curiosity, but you couldn’t have anticipated her becoming one of your most active viewers. “no, van, this was all pretty spontaneous,” you reply, reaching for the water bottle on your desk to take a sip.

“hi, antler queen!” nat greets in the meantime, easily taking over the job of engaging with your chat. “yeah,” she chuckles at another message, “i’m ‘the girlfriend.’”

“i know, right, buzzbuzz09?” you wipe your mouth with the back of your hand before turning to look at nat, whose eyes are still set on the screen. it’s a relief to see her having fun with this; nat had always been interested and, more importantly, supportive of your work, but getting to let her become an actual part of it (and seeing your viewers react so positively) is everything you could’ve hoped for.

♯4 ─ chat noticing nat.

a knock on the door snaps you out of the video game you’re currently playing, still grinning at a joke one of your mods had made when you notice nat in the doorway. you quickly push one side of your headphones off and, even quicker, mute your stream and pause your game. “what’s up?” you ask, then add: “i’m on mute, they can’t hear you.”

nat smiles. “don’t worry. i’m gonna head out now, okay?”

“sure,” you hum, swiveling from side to side in your chair, “meeting up with van?”

“yeah,” she nods, “and picking up some groceries. do you need anything?”

you frown, eyeing the screen in your peripheral, where people have already started pointing out that you’re on mute and, worse, concluded that you must be taking to nat. “van is in chat right now,” you say as you turn back to her.

“great, it’ll be like a fucking baby monitor.”

you narrow your eyes as nat grins at you and repeats: “so, do you need anything?”

“a less attentive chat,” you mutter, “shane kemp says hi.”

“right…” she rolls her eyes affectionately. “i’m gonna go now.”

“have fun!” you still call after her, smiling to yourself once you turn back to your chat and unmute.

♯5 ─ chat asking for potential streams with nat.

“nat!” you call down the hallway. she’d accidentally walked through the background of your stream once, but these days, one nat sighting (even if it is only one single glimpse of her in the background of your streams), is enough for chat to go all crazy. now, though, one user in particular had brought up an interesting idea.

“what’s up?” her head appears around the doorframe, fully visible to your viewers this time.

“buzzbuzz09 wants to know if we’re gonna start streaming together?” you spin in your chair to face her. your relationship, which had been some great mystery at the start of your streaming career, is a fan favorite by now. a couple of weeks ago, some viewers had also started finding nat’s instagram and, while it had been a little weird at first, it wasn’t all that hard for them to do, considering nat’s account was public, and you were already following her on your main. besides, she didn’t mind once people started tagging her in fan edits.

nat chuckles as she runs a hand through her freshly bleached hair. “they’re asking for that now, huh?”

“yeah,” you nod, glancing back at the screen. “i think a lot of people would like that.”

+ TEXTS WITH STREAMER GIRLFRIEND NAT.

▸ you’ve lost track of time while streaming & she wants to go to bed.

▸ asking nat if she’s okay with being on stream today.

▸ nat distracting you via text during one of your streams.

▸ nat & your cat daughter.

▸ nat made dinner for you.

[likesomethingidk]

Need need need someone to write a Nat x reader fic based on more than a friend by girli UGHHH

[riverrexd]

just wrote this rq because I was bored.. sorry if it isn't what you imagined :)

You met Nat in your freshman year chemistry class. When you were assigned as lab partners, it was awkward at first, both of you struggling to start a conversation, not knowing what to expect from the other. But when your experiment blew up on you, leaving you both scrubbing blue gunk off your clothes in the girls’ bathroom, you couldn’t help but laugh together, and you basically spent every moment after that doing the same. 

The two of you had been through a lot together. Most notably, she was the one who gave you relationship advice when you got with your first boyfriend, Liam. When he asked you out, you were reluctant to say yes. He was a cute boy, but something about your interactions seemed staged. You didn’t explain this to Nat though, instead you told you were just shy, so she snatched your phone and sprinted across the room, texting Liam that you were excited to hang out with him, leaving you a giggling mess as you chased after her. 

When Liam took your virginity, you obviously had to tell Nat, leaving out the part where you closed your eyes, and pictured a familiar blonde on top of you instead. You weren’t even ready to admit that part to yourself. 

The longer Liam and you dated, the more distanced you got from Nat. Liam wanted to spend all his time with you, and Nat, being the good friend that she is, didn’t mind you hanging out with him more, because she could just hang out with Kevyn. This made you angry for some reason. Every encounter you had with Liam, left you hungry for something he could never provide; something softer, warmer, something more Nat. 

Though you weren’t spending as much time together, the two of you would keep in touch. One night, Natalie invited you to a party. She dragged you across the hot, crowded room, looking back at you with her blood-red lipstick and messy blonde hair. You looked at her in awe, blaming it on the fact that she was your best friend, and you would always admire her. 

It wasn’t hard for you to get Liam as a person off your mind, but Liam as an obligation, well that was a different story. The thought of having to put on the “I love you” act as soon as you left this party sent shivers down your spine, so you naturally decided to have one, or two, or ten drinks. Nat warned you to slow down, but all you could see were her plump lips moving, leaving you with a feeling that only made you want to drink more. 

Around midnight you started to feel sick, and Natalie dragged you up to the bathroom. As soon as you got on your knees, you started throwing up, with Nat holding your hair back supportively. You couldn’t control yourself, and looked up at her through tufts of messy hair, whispering “Hey Nat, I like you.”

She smiled a goofy grin at you and responded, “Well, you’re the best.” Her kind voice hurt worse than a slap in the face would have at that moment. 

The two of you had always told each other you’d loved each other, ending every text with an “ily” or a heart. To her, it meant friendship, stability. To you, this was the only place where you could ever speak your mind. It was real, and raw, like the wound under a bandaid, finally getting fresh air. 

After that party, things were normal. You were still with Liam, wishing it was Nat, and Nat was still her messy, beautiful self, who bit her lip when she laughed, making you sweat and imagine how it would feel if she did it to your lips instead. 

Your routine of staying somewhat distant, but still keeping in touch continued until a few weeks ago, when you found out Liam was cheating on you. You cried of course, using Nat’s shoulder as your tissue. Though Liam was not the love of your life, far from it actually, you thought you were his, and his cheating made it feel like the act you were putting on was all for nothing.

Almost stronger than the grief you felt was the feeling of relief. You no longer had to act like you loved Liam, but that didn’t mean you could admit to anyone, even yourself, your feelings for Natalie. Instead, you started having “girls nights” again. 

The two of you laid on her bed, Mazzy Star playing softly in the background. She got up to change into her pajamas. You watched. The smoothness of her skin and the tone of her back made it impossible to look away, until she turned back around, and you remembered you were supposed to be sad about Liam, and looked up at the ceiling, skin still slightly red from what you had just seen. 

Nat plopped dramatically down next to you, her bare leg brushing against yours. You turned to face her, and she did the same, causing a strand of blonde hair to fall across her cheek. You instinctively brushed the hair away, so you could see all of her. You couldn’t tell if you’d imagined the flush of her cheek after your fingers made contact, and pretended that it didn’t make you feel butterflies all over. 

Nat whispered to you, “it’s gonna be okay,” and you nodded, despite that fact that you knew it would never be fucking okay, because you don’t know if Nat will ever be more than a friend, and that uncertainty kills you inside.

[riverrexd]

𝙱𝚞𝚋𝚋𝚕𝚎𝚐𝚞𝚖 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝙲𝚒𝚐𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚜 ⟡ 𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 2

𝖭𝖺𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗂𝖾 𝖲𝖼𝖺𝗍𝗈𝗋𝖼𝖼𝗂𝗈 𝗑 !𝖥𝖾𝗆!𝖢𝗁𝖾𝖾𝗋𝗅𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋!𝖱𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋

chapter 1 here for those who missed it ;)

𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝗌𝗎𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗒: 𝖭𝖺𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗂𝖾 𝖼𝗁𝗈𝗈𝗌𝖾𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗅𝗈𝖼𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇 𝗈𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖿𝗂𝗋𝗌𝗍 𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗀𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖺𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗀𝗇𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍, 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗍𝖺𝗄𝖾 𝗂𝗇 𝖺 𝗇𝖾𝗐 𝖾𝗑𝗉𝖾𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖼𝖾, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖭𝖺𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗂𝖾 𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗌 𝗆𝗈𝗋𝖾 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎.

𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗇𝗍 𝗐𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌: 𝗌𝗎𝖻𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗇𝖼𝖾 (𝗐𝖾𝖾𝖽) 𝗎𝗌𝖾, 𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌 𝗈𝖿 𝖻𝗎𝗅𝗅𝗒𝗂𝗇𝗀, 𝖺𝗀𝖺𝗂𝗇, 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽 𝖻𝖾 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗉𝗋𝖾𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝖺𝗌 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗇𝖺𝗅𝗂𝗓𝖾𝖽 𝗁𝗈𝗆𝗈𝗉𝗁𝗈𝖻𝗂𝖺? 𝗄𝗂𝗇𝖽𝖺 𝖺/𝗇: 𝖨 𝖺𝗆 𝗌𝗈 𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗉𝗒 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝖾𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗉𝖾𝗈𝗉𝗅𝖾 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖿𝗂𝗋𝗌𝗍 𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗍𝖾𝗋! 𝖨𝗍 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗆𝗈𝗍𝗂𝗏𝖺𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗐𝗋𝗂𝗍𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝗊𝗎𝗂𝖼𝗄𝗅𝗒. 𝖨 𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖾𝗇𝗃𝗈𝗒 𝗂𝗍 𝗃𝗎𝗌𝗍 𝖺𝗌 𝗆𝗎𝖼𝗁, 𝗂𝖿 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝗆𝗈𝗋𝖾 ;) 𝖠𝗅𝗌𝗈, 𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗌 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝖻𝖾 𝗌𝗆𝗈𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖺 𝗃, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖨 𝗈𝗇𝗅𝗒 𝗌𝗆𝗈𝗄𝖾 𝖼𝖺𝗋𝗍𝗌, 𝗌𝗈 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗂𝗇𝖺𝖼𝖼𝗎𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗂𝖾𝗌 𝗆𝖺𝗒 𝖺𝗋𝗂𝗌𝖾, 𝗉𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗌𝖾 𝗂𝗀𝗇𝗈𝗋𝖾

You try not to laugh as the salon worker scrubs your feet with a stone.

"It tickles doesn't it?" Jackie says with a smile.

"Oh my God, so much!" You giggle in response.

"So how are you feeling about your psych partner?" Jackie inquires, a knowing look in her eyes.

You sigh and splash the water with your free foot before responding, "I was feeling okay at first, until I tried talking to her and she literally acted like I killed her dog! Or cat, she seems like a cat person actually."  

Jackie laughs, in that "make everything better" kind of way. "I guess she is kind of shy," Jackie says, empathy seeping through her words.

You shoot her a look that says "Are you crazy?!" before proceeding to actually say, "Are you crazy?! That's like saying Satan is shy!"

Jackie laughs again, this time loud enough to prompt the lady working on her feet to look up at her sharply, causing  Jackie to cover her mouth. "Listen, she may listen to loud music, and drink a lot, and do drugs, and get with a lot of guys-"

"Jeez Jackie.." you interject.

"BUT, she is still my teammate, and deep, deep, deep down, I think she is a sweet girl who seriously needs some female friends," Jackie finishes. 

One thing you love about Jackie is how she always finds at least something good in everyone, even the people she is usually talking badly about. You begin to agree with her sentiment until your phone buzzes: 

Unknown Number: this u pompoms?

"Never mind, she's still Satan!" you groan, "I mean, who starts a conversation like that?"

Jackie peeks over your shoulder to see the text message and giggles. "Well, you better respond... pompoms," Jackie teases.

"Ha Ha," you deadpan, while formulating your response. For some reason, a wave of nervousness flows through you when you click send.  

You: Sorry, I don't have this number saved :( Is this wannabe Kurt Cobain?

You tap your foot anxiously in the water, causing the worker to firmly grab your ankle to make you stop. "Sorry," you squeak out shyly. You don't know why you're so nervous. It can't be because of Natalie. Maybe it's because you're cheering at a game tomorrow? Yeah that must be- SHE TEXTED BACK. 

Scatorccio: real funny. so we gonna meet for this project or wut?

"Huh, I'm surprised she is actually putting in the effort to do the assignment. Normally she just takes the F if she doesn't wanna do something," Jackie said, before leaning back against the salon chair. 

"Maybe she likes me," you joked, causing Jackie to look back at you incredulously, sending another head-turning wave of laughter through the nail salon. 

Natalie rolls out of bed at eleven a.m that Saturday, and checks her phone to see a message from you.

PomPoms: Don't forget, my house @ 11:30, for psych. Be on time.

Nat chuckles at how uptight you are until she realizes she is supposed to be there in thirty minutes and is still in her boxers and t-shirt from last night. "Shit," she curses, while rushing to the bathroom.

Normally, she'd just change her pants and head out with her leftover makeup from last night, but something in her tells her to put some effort into her appearance. She just doesn't want to prove to you that she's dirty trailer trash like you're probably already thinking. That's the only reason why. That's why she re-does her makeup, tries on three different outfits, and shows up twenty minutes late to your house with an awkward knock on the door. 

"Oh, I'm sorry, did the last part of my text not send? You know, the part that said 'be on time?'" You interrogate her, as you lean on the door frame of your, what Nat is noticing to be, nice ass house. 

"Yeah, ya know, I just couldn't find this place through all the picket fences and perfectly trimmed bushes  everywhere," Nat replies, following you inside as she shamelessly glances around in awe. 

The place is spotless, with perfectly polished hardwood floors, incredibly high white ceilings, and a bright white sectional couch in front of a television that could fit in at a movie theatre. 

"Holy shit-" Nat remarks, still taking in the sight of everything that is the L/N abode. 

"What?" You ask, almost cluelessly. 

"What do you mean, 'what?' Your house is nice as hell!" Nat replies, surprised at your lack of understanding. 

You blush at the compliment, but Nat notices a weird look on your face that makes her think you've heard this a million times before, and aren't the biggest fan of the statement.

"Yeah well, don't go switching up on me now" you joke in response. 

"Me?" Nat dramatically gasps and fakes an offended hand on her chest, "Never," she replies while picking up and putting down random items you have scattered around. 

"Do you want something to drink before we start?" You ask politely, reminding Nat that she is here just for a project.

"I'm good," she replies. Nat has never really been someone who is good at accepting offers, even something as small as a glass of water. 

You plop down casually on the jumbo couch like it's nothing special. Nat sits gently, like she could break it if she moves wrong. 

"Relax Scatorccio," you start, "you're acting like you're trying not to get caught stealing," you joke. 

Despite your lighthearted intentions, Nat gets annoyed by the comment. Rumors fly, and she's sure that you've heard, and spread, your fair share of them. "That girl's no good, she stole from a liquor store," "Stay away from that Natalie girl, she's a whore," "Did you hear that Scatorccio girl killed her dad-"

"Natalie?" Her thoughts are interrupted by your voice. She is surprised at how sincere you sound, like  you care about where her mind was just at. She assumes you're just faking it, like your smiles when you cheer. 

"Did you hear me? I said we should start talking about the assignment now," you add. 

"Oh, yeah. Right," Natalie replies. 

"So it says we are to hangout for two weeks, at least three times a week, preferably more, and mark our emotional and social observations as we 'dive into our new friendship'" you read off the packet Mr. Nolan gave you.

Nat scoffs. "So the assignment is literally just to hangout with you?" She asks, confused on what the point is. 

"Yep," you reply.

"Well that's gonna be hard," Natalie says, half joking. 

"Tell me about it," you reply. 

"So does this count as a hangout?" Natalie asks. 

"Well it says the hangouts should be formatted like how you would hangout with any other friend. Would you say you and your other friends usually sit around on the couch talking about psych class?" you ask sarcastically. 

Natalie pictures you at one of her and her friends' typical hangouts and laughs. The thought of PomPoms smoking weed in the park at three a.m is really something. 

"What's funny?" you ask.

"Nothing," Nat starts, "I just can't imagine you'd like the kind of things my friends and I do."

"Likewise," you retort, "but we need to do it for the assignment." 

"Okay, so let's just do every other hangout" Nat plans. 

You nod, and finish her thought, "you pick the activity one day, and I pick the next."

"So when do we start?" Nat asks.

"Now."

"Where are we going?" you ask?

Somehow Nat convinced you to let her drive your car to her location of choice. She claimed it was for the "element of surprise" but deep down you wonder if she is going to murder you out here. 

You look out the window and see trees. Not unusual for Wiskayok (good), but also not helpful for identifying where you are (bad). Eventually, you pull into an empty parking lot, and follow Nat out the car door. 

"This is it?" You ask, looking around for some clue of what you could possibly be doing here. 

"Yep," she replies, like she is allergic to providing details. 

"I knew you were weird Scatorccio but being entertained by tarmac is a whole new low," you tease. 

Natalie rolls her eyes and prompts you to follow her to a bench that looks like it could collapse from the rust at any moment. For some reason you sit down, hoping the dirty seat doesn't stain your pink skirt.

"Now look who needs to relax," Natalie says with a scoff. 

You roll your eyes, waiting for Natalie to explain what her plan is. 

"You said we should do what we normally do with our friends," Nat begins.

"You better not try to give me a blow job," you jab.

Nat, trying to ignore your comment, continues on, "well, usually my friends and I go to some empty place, smoke weed, and talk about the world."

You shoot onto your feet, "no,no,no, we can not smoke," you whisper the word smoke, like your parents will hear you from here. 

"Why not?" Nat asks, genuinely curious. 

"Well, we certainly can't write about that in the report!" You argue. 

Nat laughs "so write that we 'explored each other's hobbies.'"

You slowly sit back down, staring down at your shoes nervously. "I've never done it before," you say shyly. 

Nat is genuinely surprised by this. She was sure some jock would have peer pressured you into getting high at a party or something. She starts to regret pushing it and says, "I mean, we don't have to."

Though you know you should deny, some part of you wants so badly to say yes, and that part of you wins, "screw it," you say. 

"Wow, PomPoms is all badass now," Nat teases. 

You roll your eyes as you watch her flick her lighter. 

"So," Nat begins, rotating the joint as she lights it, "you just bring it up to your mouth, and inhale a small amount, then blow it out, easy as pie," the blonde explains. 

You grab the joint from her, your fingers brushing as you do, sending a shiver through your spine that you choose to ignore, and you do as she said. Except it was not "easy as pie" and you begin to have a coughing fit, making Nat double over laughing. 

"It's normal PomPoms, don't be embarrassed," she reassures ineffectively, as she is still cackling. 

Nat puts out the joint and looks up at you, sprawled out on the bench, staring up at the now setting sun. 

"Wowww," you whisper, "so this is what it feels like to be high."

Nat chuckles and asks, "so what's the verdict?"

You send her a lazy thumbs up and continue staring up at the sky. She uses this as an opportunity to get a good look at you. She always knew you were pretty, it's obvious. But looking at you under the orange light of the sky, she can see you aren't just commercial pretty, you're write a poem about you pretty. 

She erases the thought from her mind and tries to remember all the reasons you never hung out before. It's not just the fact that you're a pretty cheerleader, but it's also the fact that the people you choose to be around are the exact people that have made her high school years hell. She wonders if you really believe all the things people say about her, and if you do, why are you here with her, looking goofily up at the sky?

"Why are you looking at me Scatorccio?" You ask, not in a sharp, accusatory tone, but in a hazy, curious tone. 

Nat clears her throat and says, "shouldn't we be asking each other questions? Like, for the project."

"Ohh, right, the project," you say, adjusting your body into an overdramatic "serious" position, with your legs crossed and your hand on your chin. "Ask away, detective."

"So uh," Natalie struggles to find a question to ask, despite not knowing anything about you, "What do you like to do when you're alone?" She lands on, instantly regretting how pervy the question came out. 

You giggle, "at least take me to dinner first." Nat blushes and you continue, "Well usually I'm so tired when I get home, because of all the people I see," Nat wonders if you were trying to rub in your popularity, or if that was really how you felt, "so I just put on some music and stare at the ceiling."

Huh, Nat thinks. Not what she was expecting. She doesn't know what she was expecting actually,  maybe for you to just come home and call some guy or something? But the answer makes her see you a little bit differently, not enough to want to be friends, let's not get ahead of ourselves, but enough for her to wonder what kind of music you listen to, even though it's probably shitty. 

She indulges herself in asking, despite her suspicions, "so what kind of music do you listen to PomPoms?"

Your eyes light up, like you just came up with the most brilliant idea, and you grab onto Nat's shoulders like a little kid, "that should be our next hangout!" you remark, "I can show you my music!"

Nat looks at both of your hands on her shoulders and a feeling somewhere between disgust and excitement jolts her out of the moment. 

"Sure, but we should get going," she says dryly, standing up and tearing your hands off her abruptly. 

She ignores the way your slight frown makes her feel, as she heads towards the car, ready to drive you home, leaving this night behind her. 

𝖺𝗇𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖺/𝗇 𝖻𝖾𝖼𝖺𝗎𝗌𝖾 𝖨 𝖼𝖺𝗇'𝗍 𝗌𝗁𝗎𝗍 𝗎𝗉: 𝗐𝗈𝗐 𝖺𝗇𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝖽𝗈𝗇𝖾! 𝖨 𝖿𝗂𝗇𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗋𝗇𝖾𝖽 𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝗍𝗈 𝗆𝖺𝗄𝖾 𝗆𝗒 𝗉𝗈𝗌𝗍𝗌 𝖺𝗍 𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗌𝗍 𝖺 𝖻𝗂𝗍 𝖼𝗎𝗍𝖾𝗋, 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗍𝖺𝖼𝗄𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖧𝖳𝖬𝖫𝗌… 𝖨 𝖺𝗆 𝗌𝗈 𝖺𝗉𝗉𝗋𝖾𝖼𝗂𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝖠𝖭𝖸 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇, 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗋 𝗋𝖾𝖻𝗅𝗈𝗀𝗀𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗂𝗌 𝖬𝖴𝖢𝖧 𝖺𝗉𝗉𝗋𝖾𝖼𝗂𝖺𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝖺𝗌 𝗂𝗍 𝗁𝖾𝗅𝗉𝗌 𝗆𝖾 𝗄𝗇𝗈𝗐 𝗉𝖾𝗈𝗉𝗅𝖾 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝗆𝗒 𝗌𝗍𝗎𝖿𝖿, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗆𝗈𝗍𝗂𝗏𝖺𝗍𝖾𝗌 𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗄𝖾𝖾𝗉 𝗀𝗈𝗂𝗇𝗀.

kiss/cig divider by: @strangergraphics

tags: @slutformangos

[strangergraphics]

vintage wallpaper dividers part six:

please like and credit if you use, reblogs are appreciated! thank you! 💕

[us-nowhere-girls]

This is giving "summer harvest in the fae lands" vibes

[rhiannonsknife]

breaking into a rich person's property with natalie on a hot summer night so you can cool off in their pool? her pushing you into it with all ur clothes on and then you dragging her in too as revenge? playing around in the water and making out but being interrupted by a security guard so now both of you have to book it before you're caught? running back to her trailer and taking each other's wet clothes off on the way to the shower/bed? pls tell me u see the vision

» nat scatorccio x gn!reader.

— warnings: lots of fluff. some slightly suggestive content. mdni. smoking/weed. they break into private property and then almost get caught, but does that need a warning lmao?

for one single, breathless moment, you’re suspended midair, not enough time for your brain to comprehend the shove from natalie fully, but plenty to let out a high pitched (much too loud, given the circumstances of your little pool date) yelp of “nat!” before splashing into the pool. bubbles rush past your ears and you disappear below the surface, still wearing all your clothes, water soaking into them as it swallows your body whole. as quickly as you go under, you break the surface again and push wet strands of hair from your face with both eyes still shut, trying to orient yourself without getting chlorine in them. once you finally blink them open, though, your gaze instantly lands on your girlfriend, currently doubled over laughing while kicking off her shoes & peeling off her socks to leave them on the edge of the pool. “asshole!” you shout.

wheezing, nat points a finger at you. “you should’ve seen your fucking face!”

“you- you pushed me!”

“well, duh.”

you wipe water from your eyes and glare, which, even as you do it, does very little to help your case. if anything, your girlfriend’s grin only widens while she quickly peels off her second sock, too, and even if you got out now and tried to get your revenge, she’d probably cannonball into the pool before you managed to heave yourself over the edge in your soaked clothes. so, accepting defeat, you push yourself off the ground and float on your back, opting to be the nice guy and wait for nat to join you on her own. you have no doubt that she will, and not only because she’s taken her shoes off: it wouldn’t have been worth the risk otherwise, doing what you both did if nat wasn’t planning on swimming, too.

looking over to her, nat’s bleach blonde hair is all messy from the humidity of another hot wiskayok summer, her top sticking to her skin where sweat has soaked through the fabric, and, while you will admit the push was unexpected, the cool water is also a much needed refresher. behind nat rises the absurdly large house of your clueless hosts, carefully picked with your girlfriend insisting that the family who resides here is spending their summer fuck knows where in europe (her words, not yours), leaving their mcmansion empty for all of summer. you didn’t ask how nat knew that, trusting her enough not to be scared when you climbed the iron gates at the end of the driveway, up the small hill & through landscaping that reminded you way more of a small forest than somebody’s fucking yard, before eventually emerging onto a sprawling terrace with a pool sitting right at its center.

you didn’t even know there were people in your bumfuck smalltown that rich when, hours earlier, nat had told you about this house in the backseat of her car, insisting that nobody would know. most of the security cameras were fake, she’d said, to scare off burglars, and besides, you weren’t there to steal or vandalize anything. matter of fact, if you did it right, nobody would know you’d been there at all: all you’d do was take a plunge into their pool, in & out, just like that. with the heat pressing down on you, even with the ac of nat’s car blasting, and sweat practically dripping down your back, you couldn’t argue with that.

now here you are, floating on your back in said pool and left hoping that what nat said about those security cameras is true. granted, there had been no alarm, either, despite the multiple signs warning about one as you jumped the fence, so...

slipping back onto your front, you dive under, coming up for air right at the pool’s edge. “get in here,” you say to nat’s shins, which you are face to face with from this angle.

nat chuckles, and dips a single toe into the water. “i need to warm up first,” she mocks, seemingly intending to take her sweet time after pushing you in with no warning whatsoever. so, your hand shoots out of the water to make a playful grab for her ankle, because if she can be an asshole about this, so can you. “fuck!” nat yelps, stumbling back with a laugh, only to forget she’s standing on wet concrete, and, slippery as it is underfoot, she obviously loses her balance. sensing that she’s gonna fall, and rather than risk cracking her head on the deck, nat opts for the less painful option and throws all her weight forward, splashing stomach first in the pool.

she resurfaces right beside you, coughing, with water & what remains of her eyeliner streaming down her face. “you little shit-” nat still rasps before she lunging, giving you no time to so much as laugh at her. screaming, you get dragged beneath the surface, and come up choking on laughter by the time your girlfriend’s surprisingly strong arms release you. “that’s what you get!” she exclaims, despite chuckling herself.

her tank top is utterly soaked, plastered to nat’s frame like the rest of her clothes, only that the top’s light color and the fact that she chose to ditch her bra make up for a great view that you struggle to tear your eyes from. belatedly, you force them away, lifting your gaze only to find nat already staring at you, cocking her head and asking: “what are you looking at?”

“nothing,” sheepishly, you sink into the water until only your eyes remain above the surface, a futile attempt at hiding the redness of your cheeks.

nat huffs, smiling still. slowly, she starts backing you up until your shoulders bump against the pool wall, eliciting a quiet gasp from your lips at the unexpected contact. “nothing, huh?” she lifts a wet hand from the water and brushes a strand of hair from your face, then settles it against your shoulder, not once breaking eye contact all throughout this.

“nat…” you lick your lips, right on time before she crashes her mouth against yours, eagerly swallowing up the surprised noise drawn from you. weightless under the water, nat hoists you up with ease, and lets you wrap your legs around her midsection as you kiss hungrily, tasting the chlorine on the other’s lips. water splashes over the edge when she pushes you up against it harder, one of your own hands cupping her cheeks as you struggle to reciprocate the kiss equally. the taste of not only the pool water but the smoke of the joint you shared in her car earlier makes you all dizzy, mouth moving slower than usual to drink it all down.

fortunately, nat is a great kisser, making up for what you’re struggling to deliver: she tilts her head along with yours, never letting you get too far, and, pinned to the wall like that, what else is there for you to do if not go along with it? pressing herself closer, you hear nat groaning against your lips, her hands roaming your sides, from your ass to your chest, then back down again. at some point, there’s also the slick of her tongue, and then you’re sucking on it, mouth open for her to enter, and you’re about to tilt your hips in search of her thigh to slot between them when-

when nat suddenly splashes water at you, catching you entirely off guard and leaving you gasping for breath. just as fast as she’s stepped into your space, she’s swimming out of it again, still kicking her legs for good measure so that even more gets in your face. “fuck you!” you yell, blindly retaliating by shoving water in the direction of her giggles, all whilst wiping at your eyes. just like that, it seems, your make out session is over: nat takes off toward the deep end, but struggles to move in a straight line, with how much she’s laughing in the process.

gaining on her, you chase nat into one corner of the pool, where there’s no escaping for her. to avoid getting grabbed, though, she dunks you instead, shoving you below the surface by planting both hands atop your head. she does succeed at that, temporarily at least, and you go under for a second before coming back up, spluttering. it is your turn to lunge at her, then, still twisting out of your grip like an eel as you grab nat to try to haul yourself up her shoulders. her laughter bursts through the surface in bubbles, even once you’ve pushed her underwater again, relenting to your play fighting as her body…goes slack?

frowning, you pull back and release her, yet nat only sinks lower, until she has disappeared entirely, not even the top of her head breaking the water anymore. “nat?” below you, her blurry outline hangs motionless in the blue water, floating without touching the ground. “nat?” you try again, stomach dropping when there’s still no reaction from her. “natalie, i swear to god, stop screwing around-” just then, a pair of hands closes around your ankles, the contact making you shriek as you’re suddenly yanked underwater.

this time around, you & nat emerge from beneath the surface at the exact same time: her cackling, while you have to heave for breath and recover from that, muttering: “you are the fucking worst.”

flipping you off teasingly, nat lets herself float out of reach, her gaze turned upward to watch the crescent moon reflecting silver across the water. with the giddiness wearing off, you sigh and join her, both of you keeping your arms outstretched as the water gently rocks your bodies. eventually, she turns her head as far as she can without sinking under, the small splash making you turn your own to look over at her. “you know…” nat starts, but whatever she was gonna say, you don’t get the chance to find out.

behind you, at the house, a light snaps on, lighting up one side of the mansion’s porch. you both freeze, and nat mutters: “what the fuck?” right when a second floodlight joins the first. next thing you know, there comes a voice from near the house, calling: “hey!”

“shit!” in your peripheral, nat’s eyes go wide. a flashlight beam sweeps across the lawn, catching against bushes & patio furniture before inevitably skimming over the water as well. reflected in nat’s pupils, the light flashes white, and she grabs your hand. “run.”

“what?”

“fucking run!”

the security guard is little more than a shadow against the bright backdrop of the porch lights, but his outline is making its way towards you. “who’s out there?”

simultaneously launching yourselves toward the pool steps, you & nat scramble out at the opposite end of the yard, a good amount of distance between you and the guard giving you a head start. water pours from your clothes as you break into a run, leaving a trail of wet footprints across the warm stone. thank god you both decided to wear shorts today, so the fabric of your pants only clings to the upper half of your legs as you begin sprinting. nat still manages to grab her sneakers in passing, whilst your own shoes are waterlogged and squelch under your feet with every step you take away from the house. behind you, the beam of light swings wildly across the lawn, seemingly still trying to catch up, but given how distant the voice sounds already, you’re relatively sure you’ll make it back to the fence in time.

nat, despite being the one barefoot, reaches it first and begins her climb only mere seconds before your body crashes into it, too, carrying too much momentum to stop in time. the drenched denim of your shorts doesn’t make it any easier, but high on adrenaline as you are, hysterical giggles spilling from your lips, you do manage to haul yourself up. “hurry!” nat calls from the top, then disappears over the other side, the landing ending in a muffled thud. “come on!”

“i’m trying!” risking a glance over your shoulder, you see the flashlight beam searching. it’s so close, it lights up the fence below you, creeping further & further up, nearly at your feet until you throw yourself over the top, just as the light reaches the spot where you’d been climbing. neither of you waits around to find out whether the security guard intends to follow: once down there, you take off immediately, rushing through the dark to put as much distance between yourselves and the property as possible. fuck knows if the guy called the cops, but if he did, it probably won’t take much for them to put two & two together if they find you, drenched to the bone and running through the neighborhood in the middle of the night.

once back in nat’s trailer, empty as per usual with her mom not around, you don’t waste any time. you barely make it up the steps, actually, leaving a trail of water in your wake as you stumble inside. as soon as the door falls shut behind you, your back is slammed against the wall, nat’s lips on yours, her fingers curled in the drenched collar of your shirt. “fuck,” you mumble between kisses, holding her close by the back of her neck. “that was close.”

“mhm,” nat‘s hum reverberates against your lips.

“do you think he called the cops?” by then, she’s hooked her fingers under the hemline of your shirt, peeling it off your abdomen and then upwards against the resistance of the wet fabric clinging to your skin. “don’t care,” she mutters, and pulls away just far enough so that she can tug your shirt off properly, all while breathing heavily, before reconnecting your lips. “don’t fucking car.”

gasping, you tip your head back to the wall behind it as nat starts trailing kisses down the side of your neck, tongue darting out occasionally as her hands have come up to cup your breasts through your bra. “fuck,” she rasps and lets her forehead drop against your shoulder. only now, whilst practically kneading your tits in her palms, does she stop to take a breath. panting yourself, you soothingly run your fingers through the fine hair at the nape of her neck. “is that okay?” nat asks, glancing up.

mouth agape, breathing heavily, all you have to do is nod.

[fleshtomyteeth]

someone made a gif of nat crashing out and im fucking crying

this is my new go-to reaction media when im upset

[riverrexd]

bubblegum and cigarettes ･ﾟﾟ･｡ natalie scatorccio x fem reader .・゜゜・CHAPTER 1

content warnings: internalized homophobia if you squint the squintiest squint anyone has ever squinted, but basically none :)

A Natalie Scatorccio x Cheerleader!Reader story where they are forced to work on a psych project together (shitty overview but you need to read to find out)

Your psychology teacher's face becomes a blur as you zone out while staring at the lecturing man. Your mind wanders off to your afterschool plans which include cheer practice, meeting up with Jackie to get your nails done, and-

"Mrs. L/N!" Your thoughts are interrupted by your teacher's hoarse voice. 

You look up to see his gray mustache downturned into an almost cartoonish frown, as he appears to be awaiting a response from you. You perk up just enough to respond with an almost overenthusiastic "Yes, Mr. Nolan?"

"Though I know my face is quite interesting, I'm afraid you won't learn psych by staring at it the whole period,"  he replies, while turning back to the whiteboard. 

The class bursts into a collective laugh and your face burns as you make a mental vow to never zone out in this class again. You turn to your best friend Jackie, and notice she is already looking at you with an apologetic smile, which somehow helps to ease some of your embarrassment. You manage to mouth an exaggerated "Oh my God" through a stifled giggle, causing both your's and the dirty blonde's smile to grow. 

In that moment, Mr. Nolan's voice began again as he explains, "Actually, as time has it we are just about done for today-" these words trigger the class to loudly begin packing up, prompting Mr. Nolan to quickly interject, "Not so fast! We have to discuss our new project so you can begin working on it over the weekend."

The class lets out a groan. Not only did you face an incredibly embarrassing moment, but you are now being bombarded by the news of the dreaded weekend homework. 

Mr. Nolan begins to explain the project, hoping to calm the aggravated class, "We are going to be doing somewhat of an experiment," the students start to loose interest, "and you all will be the subjects-" that regains their attention.  "I will be pairing you off into groups of people who I have not seen interact much, and you will log your experience of getting to know each other for the next two weeks in a journal. I'll hand out packets explaining the guidelines of the assignment in greater depth," Mr. Nolan continues, while walking around the room handing out composition notebooks with a packet tucked behind the front cover. 

Your mind begins to race as you look around the classes. He said you would be partnered with someone you don't know well, which is just about everyone in the class besides Jackie, and the few JV cheerleaders who sit in the back. Obviously you know all the football guys, but not enough for Mr. Nolan to note them as your "friends" right? The idea of having to spend two weeks, one on one, with a football jock should make you excited, but for some reason the idea puts a pit in your stomach that you choose to attribute to the idea of explaining why you have a boy over to your parents. 

Mr. Nolan stares down at a sheet of paper and begins to rattle off names of people who are paired together. Jackie gets paired with a shy girl in the front of the room, so you turn to see her reaction when you hear Mr. Nolan say your name, "you will be paired with," he pauses to check the paper again, and clears his throat before saying "Natalie Scatorccio."

You turn your head to see a bleach blonde girl already looking your way, you attempt to smile at her but she turns her head back around before you get the chance. Okay.., you think to yourself, hoping she is just having an off day, and will magically become personable when you start to work on your project. 

Mr. Nolan dismisses the class, and everyone rushes out, supplies half way out of their book bags.  You bee line for the blonde you were paired with, hoping to exchange contact information before she leaves for the weekend. When you finally find her, she is already at her locker, so you stand behind her, waiting for her to notice your presence. 

She gives you a somewhat of an annoyed glare, and you can almost see your awkward stance through the reflection of her bright blue eyes, causing you to straighten your posture before saying "Natalie?"

"That's me," she replies with a bored tone. 

"Um, I think we just got partnered for the psych project," you reply, trying not to sound affected by the disinterested look on her face.

"Yeah," she replies, putting no effort into the conversation, and turning back to close her locker. 

Though you are a cheerleader, and have been voted homecoming queen the past two years, you never considered yourself to be a mean girl. Yes the people you hang out with occasionally let out a snide remark about people who are less, um, conventional, than yourselves, and yes you sometimes laugh at those remarks, but you never considered yourself to be a "mean girl" and try not to judge others without getting to know them. However, something about Natalie's overall unwillingness to have a productive conversation with you sets you off.

"Look Scatorccio, I don't want to do this assignment any more than you do, but we got paired up together and that is just the facts. So can you please just cooperate and give me your phone number so we can get started?" You spit out, your rude tone sending a shiver down your spine. 

"Damn, Pom Poms, if you wanted my phone number you could have just asked, no need to get all pissy about it," the blonde replied, already scribbling her phone number onto an open gum wrapper.

Your face flushes, you blame it on your annoyance, as you try to utter out some defense, "What? It's not like- No. I don't WANT your phone number, I NEED your phone number-" you cut yourself off as Natalie's smirk grows wider, and you decide just scoffing is probably the option that is least likely to deepen the embarrassment hole you've dug yourself into. 

With one hand on your hip, you stick the other out sassily to accept the crumbled wrapper as you notice she's finished writing her number on it. Natalie drops the wrapper into your hand and  turns around while muttering "Seeya, PomPoms," and marching for the exit. 

You try to mutter out an annoyed "my name is-" but the girl is already out the door, leaving you to roll your eyes, and head towards the locker room for practice. 

*ೃ༄

Natalie walks onto the field, the cold, autumn, air brushing against her pale face as she approaches her teammates for practice. 

"About time you join us Nat," Jackie says while stretching. 

"Just be glad I did, captain,"  Natalie replies sarcastically while joining the girls in the stretch circle and grabbing her ankle. 

Jackie rolls her eyes and continues to chat with Shauna as Nat's eyes wander to the track behind where they are stationed on the field. A familiar looking cheerleader catches her eye as she flies through the air with a mile wide smile on her face. You. Her eyes roll in disbelief that anyone could really be that  happy to be in the air with only a few teenage girls below to catch them. 

She continues to watch you practice, wondering how much of your demeanor is an act, and how much of that she'd find out in the next two weeks, if she even chose to participate in the assignment. She watches your hair bounce, and your smile never falter, until her thoughts are interrupted by the sound of a whistle.

"Natalie! Get your head out of your ass! It's time for partner passes," Coach Martinez shouts. Natalie walks towards her usual partner, a wavy haired girl with tan skin, until she hears a chirpy voice directed her way, "Not so fast Nat! Shauna will partner with Lottie today, I wanna pass with you," Jackie says while jogging to get in front of Nat for the exercise. 

Nat wonders if Jackie is about to give her another talk about drinking too much, or being a better "team player" when it comes to showing up for team bonding activities, as her and Jackie never really got along well enough for the girl to willingly partner up with her. "Uh okay," Nat mumbled, while passing to Jackie.

"So," Jackie began, "you're partnered up with y/n for psych. That's fun right?" 

Nat just looked at the girl confused while receiving her pass, and kicking it back in Jackie's direction before sneaking another quick glance at you in the distance. "What's fun about it ? It's just a psych project," Nat replied, in a disinterested tone.

"I don't know, maybe if you guys get along you might wanna come to more team activities! She's usually hanging around with Mari or I," Jackie explained. 

Nat scoffed at the idea of her ever "getting along" with you, and the concept of Jackie's Brady Bunch fantasies she has. "Don't count on it," Natalie retorted, before she was saved by the sound of Coach Martinez's whistle, ending the warmup. 

By the end of practice Nat is drenched in sweat, and ready to go home. She heads for the locker room, watching as you head in the same direction. Her eyes roll at how you seem to glisten from the layer of sweat on top of your smooth skin, as opposed to how she is dripping and red. In the locker room, she takes notice to how you laugh with and get along with everyone on your team. Well, it's a cheer team, what is there to disagree on? Which RomCom is the best? She continues to glance at you until you begin peeling off your pink tank top, and her eyes dart to the ground in front of her, the redhead beside her scoffing as she apparently notices Nat's "totally not red" cheeks.

"What's funny Van?" Nat says, a bit more defensively than she intended.

"Nothing at all Natalie," Van says with a goofy smile.

Natalie quickly shoves her dirty close in her bag and behind to turn around to leave when she is met with the smell of strawberry shampoo breezing past her and the smooth sound of you saying "Don't forget to call me Nat" as you leave the locker room with a grin.

Nat grows angry as her teammates tease her with remarks like "is that your new friend?" and "you got a date to get your nails done Nat?" 

She slams her door shut and does her signature stomp towards the door, picturing how the next two weeks are gonna play out. 

This is gonna be fun, she finally decides. 

Afternote: OMG my first chapter done! I can't wait to hear feedback. Please be mindful that I am so new to this so the upcoming chapters may not be exactly like this as I find my footing. Thank you for your support :)

chapter 2 out now