Normalcy: Or Lack Thereof.
How time flies.
Of course I'd open this blog post with the most cliched line I could fucking ever think of. I'm supposed to be studying, well I am studying and writing something for work, but decided why not blog a little just to serve as a mental "push-up?" Have not written something on my blog for ages so decided to give it an end-of-the-semestre update.
I can't fucking believe that it's almost done. It seems that it was just a month ago that the sem has started. The good thing is, I can genuinely and honestly say that this time it's different - for better or for worse. I finally managed to have some semblance of a study habit, maybe because I need to. Still poor, by most standards and honestly, I'm not even satisfied myself but it's there.
I now know my friends. I now know who my friends are. You can really gage the type of people you'd hang out with and despite every "positivity" quote you might have read, you do choose your friends and the people you hang around with and that's okay.
However, I cannot help but to still feel alone often you know? Suicide jokes becoming more apparent but I guess that's one of my ways to cope and just laugh about it. Still been self-medicating with coffee and it's barely making a dent, but at least it keeps me look like a functioning adult.
I miss people. That I admit. I really wouldn't want to say it, but it's true. No particular relationship to say here, but I can say I miss people.
Don't really know what to do this summer as I do have a relatively boring life. I think I'll dedicate it for the mean time, hopefully at least, with doing good at my work. working out and saving money so I can enroll myself.
I do a lot of introspection. I guess maybe because I'm self-absorbed. Is that a bad thing? I'm not too sure. But what I know is, I need it from time to time to keep things in (proper) perspective.
Am I excited for the “road” ahead? Fuck that. I'm not even excited for tomorrow.












