after visiting 26 in their state, staying in their house, being in their room, exploring their hometown, and living off starbucks for a week - as a system, we have come to the conclusion that we would really benefit from moving across the country to live with them and experience all the changes that come with it.
the last visit (the most recent one) was a big step for our relationship, i tried a lot of things that i never though i’d do while i was with parker.. and it was great! i had a lot of fun, and valérie had a good time too, seeing as we’ve gotten a good schedule down for him now. and parker and i worked out a way to give riley and valérie time together during the days when me and him have things to do, and can’t let them out later or earlier. things are really coming together
the most recent trip was a big step for me and parker as partners. we both agree that we feel a lot closer to one another, more than we did before - and we seem to only keep growing closer and growing upward together. just when we thought we couldn’t be better friends or better partners together, we always somehow grow more as soon as we think we may have hit the top. it’s wonderful, really. i couldn’t be happier with where things are between me and parker.
as a system, the most recent trip confirmed a lot for us. that we need a change of pace, scenery, and people. we have always generally flourished in a stream of change. (back when valérie was the host, he would constantly rearrange our room because he hated that it was always the same - it drove him crazy.) as a system, that craving for change seems to flow to everyone to some degree, including me. we think we will do very well with 26, in their state and with them.
this is a bit of a bummer, but we’ve recently gotten major confirmation that we’ve been a system for a long time, and we’ve had an almost constant stream of trauma since we were very young... which is a lot to take in. i can’t wait to start therapy, and maybe even dig more into our past somehow. we’ve been getting some childhood memories back, but not anything really “significant”. though, i’m happy to remember any of our life from before we were 11. it’s progress
