Operation Songbird

I'm a teacher, a writer, a couch potato, a consumer of lots of good food, and a lover of beautiful clothing

[evannabadasslovegood]

you know, a lot of haunting could probably be solved by providing ghosts with proper enrichment. ending up with blood writing on the walls? provide a box with flour or kinetic sand for words to be drawn in and patterns to explore. dealing with weird moaning and wailing? set up some instruments they can whistle through and make something more constructive. your ghostly houseguests are probably just bored being stuck in the physical world and unable to interact with anything. did you ever think about that Susan? no, you only think about yourself

[screnarchive-deactivated2022042]

me justifying the actions of my found family of morally gray characters

[felix-lupin]

[rainbow-femme]

[imthejesusofsuburbia]

the reason high school is so difficult is because ned never made a guide for anything past 8th grade

[poolsidescientist]

If there's one thing I will never understand it's Lord of the Rings fans wanting to be an elf in Middle Earth. I mean, sure they're graceful and pretty but they live too damn long and having to witness an eternity of stupidity from the species around them. Like, imagine being Elrond and basically witnessing a cringe compilation of the human race. Nope. No thanks.

[curseworm]

theres a knight in my backyard stabbing the ground with his sword trying to render my soil barren by killing the worms but luckily ive trained them all in classical ballet and they keep pirouetting away from the blade

[adulthoodisokay]

you can’t get sentences like this anywhere else

[funnytwittertweets]

[justpastryvideos]

[cleverclove]

CHOCOLATE MAN BACK AT IT AGAIN

[official-lucifers-child]

i see any large amount of chocolate and my mind just screams “it’s the fucking chocolate man again”

[moki-dokie]

this bitch knows carpentry, pottery, sculpture, architecture, AND all the chocolate/confectionary skills. what the fuck doesn’t he know?????

[digitaldiscipline]

when to quit

[westofvenus]

men in the 70s were like “I’m so very hairy how sexy of me” and they were right

[joshpeck]

Hiiiiiii ^_^ say it back

[tonightweredrinkingfromthebong]

screenshots dont do this justice

[broitsablog]

*inhuman clicking*

[frostychica]

the millennial steve irwin

[ariassong]

Wait where's that website where you group movies I thought of a good one.

[ariassong]

[howelljenkins]

when i was in fourth grade i was in the gifted program and they let us go to the library more often which meant we had more chances to take the accelerated reader tests and get points and whoever reached a certain threshold got to go to chuck e. cheese so i‘d go around asking ppl i knew had a hard time reading what their logins were and sneak in to take tests for them so they could go to chuck e. cheese too. i got caught and they didn’t let me go to chuck e. cheese but it was worth it fuck you

[howelljenkins]

that’s why we all need to LIE and CHEAT

[chuck-e-cheese-official]

We love your heroics! We’re gonna deal with whoever caught you.

[howelljenkins]

CHUCK E CHEESE OFFICIAL??

[ierotits]

we need to keep calling chris pratt a homophobe because if we do it enough he will inevitably get himself cast in a movie where he acts a gay character to try prove he's not homophobic, and then during the press tour he'll get asked if it was hard to play a gay character and he'll fuck up and say something like "yeah it was a huge challenge for me because I actually hate gay people" and it'll be a fuckin field day on tumblr

[pupangelremade-deactivated20211]

[bestiarum]

[roselightfairy]

I love that Denethor and Theoden both laid eyes on Pippin and Merry and thought, “This hobbit is the most interesting and entertaining person I have encountered in years, and I am going to make him my personal esquire and keep him by my side at all times.”

[roselightfairy]

It also strikes me that this is essentially what Thranduil does with Bilbo in The Hobbit. Not the personal esquire thing, but declaring him an elf-friend is the same idea.

[homelesscorpsebehindatrain]

Gandalf: this is a hobbit

Kings:

[sunflowersupremes]

Elrond met Bilbo exactly twice before becoming pen pals for decades AND inviting him to live with him. He even puts up with Bilbo writing songs about his parents.

[mathelaw-deactivated20260116]

In the movies is worse lmao he meets bilbo once (1), bilbo immediately insults him and elrond goes 😳 would you like to live with me

[forcesensitivebantha]

star wars is very good except where it is very very bad. hope this helps.

[lichrelly]

#the guy is hot though#anna karenina skywalker or wtvr

you mean ANAKIN!?!?