RESIDENT EVIL: VERONICA (2027)

Janaina Medeiros
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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@sabbs118
RESIDENT EVIL: VERONICA (2027)
Every morning, the queen asked her magic mirror to show her the most beautiful person in the world.
The mirror replied "To whom?"
"The miller who made the flour for my bread," the queen would say, or "Whoever spun the thread my shawl was made of".
The mirror would show her, and she'd be amazed.
The first time, she says "To me," and the mirror dutifully shows her her reflection. And she is pleased.
The second time, she says "To the King," and she is pleased to see herself once more.
The third time, she says "To the Royal Advisor," and is once more satisfied to see herself.
The fourth time, she says "To the scribe who takes the King's letters." She is shown the man's wife. And she seethes, but quiets herself, for it is only right that a man loves his wife.
The fifth time, she says "To the Court Wizard," and is shown the man's departed mother as he remembers her from his youth, radiant and smiling and warm and larger than life.
The tenth time, she says "To the Stable Master," and is shown the fastest horse in the stable, majestic and free as the wind even in captivity
"To the baker," she is shown the man's daughter, young and adorable and full of joy and laughter.
"To the artist who did my portrait," she is shown a painting of a woman done by the man's teacher, who he still looks up to now that he is well established himself.
"To the Royal Knight," she is surprised but not displeased to see the castle's entire guard force in the middle of doing drills.
The one hundredth time she asks the mirror, and it asks her "to whom?" she once again says, "To me." And she does the same the one hundred and second, and again and again and again.
It is a different person each time, and they are all beautiful.
“Because the truth is, tech doesn’t have an image problem. It doesn’t have a message problem. It has an intention problem. What’s wrong with the axe murderer who broke into my house is not that he hasn’t successfully persuaded me to buy into his narrative. What’s wrong is that he’s trying to kill me with an axe. Similarly, when you launch a product that’s designed to put millions of people out of work, block access to sources of verifiable truth, replace human creativity with slop, and lower the barriers to every sort of atrocity, the problem isn’t that you haven’t told the public a good story about those things. The problem is that you are trying to do them.”
— The 40 Most Rage-Inducing Problems in Tech
There's an arm tight around your waist when you wake. It's heavy and familiar. It pulls you a little closer as your return to consciousness becomes known.
"G'morning," you mumble, rubbing at your eyes with the point of your knuckle. You blink, once and then twice, as the waking world comes back into focus and takes the shape of a new day.
"Morning."
Levi's voice is always so raspy in the morning. So low and rough. You shiver a little at the sound, but hide it in a stretch–your movement stunted by the hold he has you in, pulled to his bare chest.
"What did you dream about?" you ask him sleepily, rolling over so you're facing his way. He lets you move freely, but keeps his arm over you, and you prop your chin in your hand once you're laying on your tummy. You watch him as he watches you.
"Dunno," he says indifferently. "You know I don't ever really remember stuff like that."
You scrunch up your nose, having expected the answer but being no less disappointed by it.
"What did you dream about?" he turns your question back to you.
"Got a boob job."
KICK THE CAN!
Let’s play the biggest game of kick the can on the internet.
To kick the can, reblog it. I wanna see how long this can go on for.
the oldest reblogs for this post that i can find are from january 2nd of 2013. this can has been getting kicked around tumblr for almost 13½ years now
with the resurgence in popularity of calvin & hobbes, I’m so surprised no one has included this
i’ll say it. fuck that fictional man friday!!!!
From the Nashville Zoo’s fb page! Here’s the petition, please please please take a moment to add your name (even if you’re not from Nashville!). If you are from Tennessee, contact your representatives and make it clear that the people do not want this data center. This is an AZA accredited zoo which is home to several species of critically endangered animals, we NEED to protect it. Make your voice heard!
Because people will pay attention to cute animals, here are some of the critically endangered/endangered species housed at the Nashville Zoo!
The Amur Leopard and Clouded Leopard (which recently celebrated its 50th cub born at the zoo!)
The Sumatran Tiger
The Red Ruffed Lemur and Ring-Tailed Lemur
The Cotton-Top Tamarin and White-Cheeked Gibbon
The Colobus Monkey and De Brazza’s Monkey
And the Mexican Spider Monkey!
Look at them!!!! Look at them and fight like hell to save them!!!!
Where are my Tennessee Peeps at!?!
my pronouns are she/her bc I'll never be him (anthony head playing on his pink ds in full costume on the set of merlin)
waking up two hours early for my job as a gacha character to put on my three discrete hair ornaments, four layers of clothes, eight-square-inch armor plates affixed to my clothes at random, various ribbons and straps that do nothing but encircle my thighs/upper arms, choker, and multi-layered gloves. however I forget to affix dangling tassles everywhere and am sacked immediately for my carelessness
Woke up ten minutes early for a far hornier gacha game and just put on booty shorts and a tank top
Let's ambush mama! 😼
"Why do Pallas cats always look grumpy?"
"Pallas kittens."
The sheer roundness of this kitten must be admired.
Rupert Giles + 🔥 🔥 🔥 [requested by Anonymous]
Marina and the diamonds
fake dating is soooooooooooooooo goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooddddddddd
its often done so poorly imho because there needs to be miscommunication, but sometimes people go overboard with it
18+
like imagine you come home from uni one summer and drop by sakanoshita market one morning after a run only to find that your dad’s best friend still runs it. you’re in a sports bra and shorts and you want to laugh at the way keishin decidedly looks away when you press the cold bottle of water he gave you right against your sweat-slick chest.
it becomes a thing—stopping by the store. usually late at night. you steal cigarettes out of keishin’s pocket, and he chides you with no real heat behind it. he plucks them from between your lips to take a drag before putting them right back and you think about indirect kisses and his callused hands.
you drink beers and get a little drunk and complain about the weather and your shitty boyfriend who thinks it’s your fault that you always take so long to cum.
keishin barks out a laugh and drags a hand through his hair as he shakes his head and you inhale as you clench your thighs together.
“it’s definitely not you, sweetheart.”
his words play over and over in your head as you plunge your fingers below the waistband of your shorts as soon as you get home.
you lay it on thick until he gives in one night, until you feel the cool wood of the office desk beneath your ass as he spreads your legs and sinks two fingers inside of you. keishin strokes your tight channel and massages your swollen clit and you cum so hard and fast you nearly cry.
he tells you how good you did for him as he kisses your cheek. tells you to go home and touch yourself like that and get a new boyfriend while you’re at it. your lips try to find his mouth, and he shakes his head with a smile.
“someone your age.”
keishin’s resolve not to be any more of a scumbag lasts all of three days before you’ve got your fingers buried in his hair while he tongue fucks you into a whimpering mess.
“we can’t keep doing this.”
till you’re bouncing on his cock in the back seat of his car.
till your loser boyfriend’s visiting for the weekend and keishin’s got you bent over the desk in his office with the store sign flipped to CLOSED, running shorts pulled to the side and thumbs pressed into the sweaty small of your back as he fucks a sticky, hot load into you and makes sure you don’t forget exactly how quickly you can cum.