a freak and a scholar

Aspiring 80’s Sci-Fi protagonist She/Her • 24

[marlynnofmany]

Small joys on Tumblr:

When your notes make a perfect cat

[marlynnofmany]

Kitty has an exclamation-point tail because of all the attention

[save-system]

[i-am-the-hero-alfred-jones]

Is this the cat that boops?

[marlynnofmany]

It is now!

[maykitz]

i have no idea what the context is but i can make a pretty good guess

[lesbianfl]

the best part of the princess bride is how it says that love is the number one motivation in life but! a close number two is spite.

[nateconnolly]

Majoring in creative writing was a colossal mistake that ruined my life financially artistically socially and spiritually BUT i got to read aloud from My Immortal to a crowd of twenty horrified bystanders for academic credit. So I broke even

[pangur-and-grim]

there was a time where this guy smelled nice and I thought it was pheromones, and like I'd get horny bc I thought it was him, but it turns out it was tide fresh laundry detergent

[buggachat]

the best female characters are the ones that online discourse calls annoying and cannot stand. this is a fact sorry. the more hated she is by the online sphere the better her character is sorry

[oswednesday]

one time at a funeral i panicked and said the first drink i could think of and the bartender made me the pina colada With all the fixings all the trims all the bells and whistles i didnt even ask imagine youre at a funeral and the person besides you is drinking a pina colada with whip cream as tall as the drink with a cherry and an umbrella, thats what happened to me

[satyriconmp3]

to have and to hold, to fuck nasty, till murder-suicide do us part

[what-even-is-thiss]

A lot of people still don’t understand me when I say that reversing desertification is a good thing. They think I hate deserts

Let me put it this way. I really like the ocean. However I don’t think it’s a good thing for the ocean to flood inland destroying ecosystems and villages because some of the natural hills that kept it at bay have been mined away. Me building a dam to keep the ocean away to bring back some of the natural barrier that was lost isn’t me trying to destroy the ocean. It’s me keeping the ocean out of my goddamned ecosystem where it isn’t meant to be anyways.

People planting new trees and grasslands on the edge of the Sahara desert aren’t trying to get rid of the entire desert. They’re replacing the natural root systems that kept the soil from blowing away that have been eaten away by overgrazing. They’re replacing the natural barrier that keeps the desert in its goddamned place.

[lakevida]

give me another amulet im not driving

[sacred-portal]

[zangoonse]

i love the phrase "cruel and unusual." not only is what you're doing mean but it's also quite frankly fucking bizarre

[senatortedcruz]

Just found a $50 bill in the street let’s hear it for girls posting their Ws online

[senatortedcruz]

Oh my fucking god I am going to kill myself

[aire1111]

50 foreskin dollars

[animentality]

[dragon-in-a-fez]

keep thinking about how I wrote in my dissertation about how every time a new form of public/social space emerges it's immediately popular with kids and teenagers who see it as a chance at freedom and then adults colonise it and kick them out. this happened with malls in the 80s and diners in the 50s and pool halls in the 20s. my dad was doing research on this trend in like 1975. and I was like "yeah so this is going to happen to the internet" and then five years later every government suddenly decided to ban kids from everywhere online. I hate being right especially when I don't even get paid for it

[storybookprincess]

so back when my little brother was in high school, my mom went as a chaperone for their senior year field trip to an amusement park. which, you know, brave move to volunteer to supervise a bunch of high school seniors let loose in a wonderland of rollercoasters and sugar

my brother and his friends in this field trip group were truly great kids. but they were not above run of the mill teenage boy shenanigans. it’s the end of senior year, you and all your buddies are at the amusement park, you’re naturally going to want to act like a complete moron

there was one kid in the group who was especially prone to goofing around. committed to the bit, some may say. my mom knew that if nonsense was going to break out, he’d likely be at the center of it

so she goes up to this kid at the very start of the trip and says “hey, i’m kinda worried about this chaperoning thing. this might be a lot to ask, but can you help me keep an eye on everyone? you wouldn’t have to do anything big, just be an extra set of eyes for me.”

friends, this kid proceeded to run their field trip group like the fucking us marines. everyone is at the meet up spots at the designated time. everyone waits in line for the rides like a bunch of boy scouts. the second the horseplay gets too out of hand, this kid is getting it back under control

it’s incredible how differently people act based on the expectations you set. instead of going to this kid and saying “hey, i know you’re trouble, so i’ve got my eye on you,” my mom went “hey, i know you have influence in your peer group, so i think you can help me.”

treat someone like a problem, they’ll act like a problem. but give people a chance to help, make them feel important, and they usually rise far above the occasion. it was a stroke of genius that i’m honestly still in awe of

[hollow-head]

"who do you self insert as when you read?"

This is me when I read: