allegory, allegorier, allegoriest

24 | ze/hir or they/them

[teathattast]

[princesswookiee-deactivated2014]

[draizetrain]

i think when u clean your house it should stay clean forever. what do u mean i have to do it again

[fizpup]

Get real.

[pastelpolitoed]

tumblr glitched while loading this, so instead of "dude get real" being the punchline, it was like this cat put on glasses for the first time and their friend was just. a legit dog. and not like them at all.

[fizpup]

This is killing me

[algebraic-dumbass]

2 + 2 = ????

it's 2 + 2 because addition is commutative

[epicsause-official]

fuck marry kill: sin cos tan

fuck sin, marry cos, kill tan

fuck sin, kill cos, marry tan

marry sin, fuck cos, kill tan

marry sin, kill cos, fuck tan

kill sin, fuck cos, marry tan

kill sin, marry cos, fuck tan

Voting ended onJun 5

[algebraic-dumbass]

happy pride month, be gay do math

[evilvarric666-archive]

Cats understand "naughty". In fact I think they're the only animal who understands it. Dogs know "good" and "bad" but not Naughty. Same with theft. Cats know what theft is. They know when they are thieving and you can see it on their faces. Squirrels are thieves but they don't know that. They know "take" and "have" but they don't comprehend what it is to steal. Nor do raccoons or coyotes or any species of rodent. They may participate in theft but they are ignorant of the weight of what they do, the full meaning of it. Cats know what crime is and they do it on purpose.

[otherwindow]

accidentally fell into somebody’s chimney

[mega-taiga]

They really said

[babygirlimgone-deactivated20240]

i love how OP is wailing over being set on fire but manages to remember to close the door behind him when he leaves the house.

[manuciruja]

awww the like button turns into a rainbow when you press it! that's so cute...hey staff what's with all the trans women you keep nuking?

[manuciruja]

i think we should be ridiculing them more for this. you don't get to try and go all "queer website" when your staff likes to go on nuking sprees targeting the trans fem users

[smadsel]

would be remiss not to mention that the rainbow notably straight up just removed the trans flag colors from it. like they’re gone. it’s the progress flag minus the trans flag colors.

[smadsel]

that’s not the whole flag, now is it

[manuciruja]

hey staff what the fuck

[villainessbian]

hey staff don't you think you're being too on-the-nose

[shrodingers-catgirl]

HEY STAFF DONT YOU THINK YOU'RE BEING TOO ON-THE-NOSE

[babushkaat]

garbonzo

[draconym]

The eye doctor is the most fun doctor you can go to. They never steal your blood. They never make you get naked and put on a paper dress. They're just like, "Can you see these letters? It's fine if you can't, we can fix that." And they don't even spell anything.

[draconym]

[fladurblegon]

“What if poor people abuse the system?”

The system intrinsically abuses poor people.

Hope this helps.

[breninarthur]

"What if poor people abuse the system?"

Rich people abuse the system far more and out of pure greed, not necessity or desperation so idrc about that

[crazy-pages]

If a system needs to be abused for poor people to get the help they need, I don't think poor people are the problem.

[interestingmistakes]

Reblogging this manually. Op doesn't want credit for fear of being terminated.

[notaplaceofhonour]

will never not be mad about gig economy apps making a 4 star rating mean “unacceptable quality”

[notaplaceofhonour]

Doordash will suspend you below 4.2 stars.

Uber drivers can be suspended at 4.6 stars.

Lyft drivers risk suspension under 4.8 stars.

Even for apps where they don’t have a publicly stated minimum, their algorithms will bury you.

4 stars does not mean 4 stars. It means 1.4 stars.

If you give a person a 4 star rating, to these companies, you are not saying “I was mostly satisfied with the service, but there’s always room for improvement”—which is what 4 stars should mean—you are voting for them to be fired.

[notaplaceofhonour]

Genuinely, do not ever give people 4 star ratings on gig service apps for any reason that is not a safety issue where their continuation on the app could seriously hurt people.

If someone gives you “just OK” service where you don’t want to give them 5 stars, but you don’t actively hate their existence and hope they die, just don’t rate them.

[krasnoarmeyets]

i bet it feels good as fuck to intend to do something and then actually do it

[sevengeese]

yeah thinking about my mom telling me as a kid not to tan because getting even darker meant she and i would get even uglier and being a tween and feeling so down realising i couldn't have a kid with blue eyes because i couldn't have a pretty child and going to visit family in india and being surrounded by advertisements for skin lightening products from the second i entered the airport

just... the way these standards are taught to and enforced on people of colour from the very start and the way it just beats us down...

the standards of beauty being white and light skinned... the assumptions of who is good and who is guilty being so often in their favour... the way that my white classmates in elementary school were genuinely marked easier by one of the teachers than the rest of us kids were for work of the same quality...