in my glass and paper cell doing crayon pullups

spider tag is #pider, art tag is #shallows art, if you don't wanna see me talk about my nearest dearest kink then filter "#it's my party and ill vore if i want to". anything else i trust you to figure out ◦•●◉✿☆✿◉●•◦ this is my happy place! if i interact with you a lot but don't follow you, that's why. zero hard feelings, just keeping my safe shallows safe and shallow ♡ ◦•●◉✿ ☆ ✿◉●•◦ unfortunately i don't do Commissions bc of adhd but if you have an idea you're free to suggest it and i may or may not draw it for you :3 ◦•●◉✿ ☆ ✿◉●•◦ if i reblog from someone shitty, that doesn't mean i know or support whatever they stand for, so don't worry about it. these are my safe shallows in a very turbulent mental landscape and i refuse to get into discourse this time, moral/ethical purity ocd ruined my life once and it won't happen again on my watch.

[shallowsenjoyer]

i am the decline of the west that the alt right manosphere girlies warned u about & nothing on gods flaming brown earth can shut me up

[stupidestasshole]

apparently im not allow to send people my spiders in the mail even if they are well trained and behave nicely

[bayboyzone]

get a job

[unsatan-offical]

hey can I tell you something. linux mint just released a big update. I know this because I got a notification telling me the update was available and I could install it if I wanted to. I didn't because I forgot about it, and lo and behold the update did not install itself or even so much as prompt me a second time. later I remembered and looked for it, it took about a minute to find and I didn't even have to look it up. It had a link to the page on what (exactly) was gonna change and was very readable and clear. I clicked the update, it ran a few things, then was like "hey I'm done, the update will kick in when the computer restarts". I went on doing my thing. when I restarted the computer, it ran a few things it normally doesn't and BOOM the computer was updated. I disliked it. the ui on the start menu was slightly different and the remapping software I needed to use my keyboard properly didn't work. so guess what? I went into Timeshift, a utility installed by default (but easily uninstallable!) on the standard Mint installation which saves a "snapshot" of the OS every however often you tell it to (for me, once a day), and told it to revert to my last snapshot. Tells me to make sure I have no unsaved work, then runs some whatever for two minutes and restarts. BOOM the computer is back on the old version, no huss no fuss no coconuts. the old start menu is back (it probs would've been easy to reconfigure it in the new v but) more importantly, my keyboard works exactly how it's supposed to again, just like that! and by the time the next major update comes out the bug in my keyboard util will probably have been fixed. and if it doesn't, no prob! just ^^^^^. or use a different one. or send a request. or find the command that makes it work anyway. less than 10 minutes googling easily.

Hey. Hey Windows users. You don't know how bad you have it.

[shallowsenjoyer]

know your orgasm! the six types:

the big finale

this is the classic movie orgasm. toe curling, mind blanking, downright pyrotechnic. is everyone who says they have these lying? we can never truly know.

the destination

it's often said that life is about the journey, not the destination. the same can be said for jerking off. sometimes you have all the fun on the way there, and when you get there... it's fine.

the wait no no no aww

you wanted to keep going. you REALLY wanted to keep going. you weren't even close to the end of that fic/comic/video. dangit.

the jumpscare

similar to the previous, it snuck up on you. but instead of feeling the sudden buildup, it was just There, out of nowhere, screaming in your face like an animatronic.

the ghost poop

easy cum, easy go. thankfully not a literal ghost poop, this orgasm is smooth and effortless, and you always feel a little refreshed after.

the nothingburger

that... that's it? i mean, that was definitely it, but... you've never been more tempted to go again without any real desire to do so, just out of the principle of the thing.

[shallowsenjoyer]

which is it? are you locked in or are you grinding? bc if it's both then girl that chastity cage is not working right

[apityingofdoves]

finally getting my shit together this time

[apityingofdoves]

finally getting my shit together this time

[shallowsenjoyer]

how did it go

[stupidestasshole]

find my 800 billion hidden spiders

[cursedpossums]

unrestrained summer fun

[cursedpossums]

every year around late may, without fail, this post starts getting notes again . and my little wet raw chicken breast of a brain gets puzzled. because i forget that summer is , in fact. a yearly event

[shallowsenjoyer]

@vocabulary-altering-posts

[lilyblisslys]

me with the. When she. When her. When the she her me

[mollyjames]

[electronicmail]

turning twenty-two next month. Last summer i was seventeen. It turns out you were seventeen last summer forever. When i turned seventeen, the summer before that i was twelve.

[shallowsenjoyer]

tech wife: *trying to leave Windows Insider*

me, high on painkillers: shorty got windows insider had to take that shit out cause she couldnt run

tech wife:

me: cause like. windows insider. i hardly know 'er

tech wife:

me: like dracula flow

[i-suggest-vore]

Not to get political or anything but I think vore is cool

[shallowsenjoyer]

siri how to bring out crisis management headmate. no im not in a crisis i just want. siri listen to me. bring out lift a car off a kid headmate to- SIRI. siri how do i give her a thank you note for the top surgery without us having to be freaked the fuck out. siri

[stupidestasshole]

Thank You for jacking off my amazing digital penis

[shallowsenjoyer]

[huge demon voice] look man i know you had to kill like three people to get this line open and i appreciate it, i do, but if im being honest i dont think i can help. my therapist told me to stop overcommitting myself to avoid burnout. [circle of fire burns out]

[strangegutz]

Little Menaces - Cora

OOAK handmade art doll