so like… Stratt used to look to Grace the way you do a last-minute appearance check in a mirror, when your feet are already headed out the door regardless. and then The Betrayal happened and the mirror shattered.
instead of a wall behind the mirror, there’s a window, and behind the window is the future. she had to shatter the mirror in order to be able to see the future through the window. the mirror had to break or else that future would be out of reach. there was no other way.
but in order to look through the window and see that future, to watch it approaching, to hold up her burning torch so the future knows where to go — she has to stand in the shards of the mirror scattered on the floor, no matter how badly her feet bleed from it.
and the thing about looking through a window - if the lighting is right, what you see depends on how you focus. the future is out there. but old habits die hard. she’s used to looking this way and locking eyes with her reflection. she still can, but that reflection is so much fainter. does it really look like her, or is that just what she expects to see? did it really look like her, before, in the mirror? the mirror’s broken. she can’t check now. the reflection in the window will never be like it was before, regardless.
she can’t step away or close her eyes. when the future arrives, guided by the beacon she holds, she has to be there to open the window. she stands in the shards of the mirror and they cut and cut and cut at her but she has to keep standing there, to make sure that breaking the mirror was worth it in the end.
Seriously, do you think Eridians have a concept of left or right? Or would they just have clockwise/counterclockwise? Since they're radially symmetric instead of bi-symmetric, their limbs are all identical and their bodies don't have a front or back. There is no constant "right" or "left" for an Eridian, except in terms of rotation.
Seriously, do you think Eridians have a concept of left or right? Or would they just have clockwise/counterclockwise? Since they're radially symmetric instead of bi-symmetric, their limbs are all identical and their bodies don't have a front or back. There is no constant "right" or "left" for an Eridian, except in terms of rotation.
“WHY did that alien ambassador just call me ‘peasant’??”
“Sorry, sorry, it’s a problem with the translation software.”
“What kind of problem? Am I about to insult him by accident too? I want it to be on purpose.”
“No, it’s just that the software had trouble with root words and etymology, comparing our concepts to theirs. They don’t have a word for ‘god,’ you see, and—”
“What the blazes does that have to do with it?”
“Look. The word ‘human’ can be translated as ‘person who lives on the ground, or the dirt, or the Earth, and who isn’t a god.’”
“So how did that—”
“It turned into ‘person who lives in the dirt and has no power over others.’ The closest they had when repeating it back through the translator was ‘peasant.’”
“That is the stupidest thing I’ve heard all week.”
“Why do you think I’ve been pressing for everyone to actually learn the language, instead of relying on the translator?”
“Well, if I make it through this meet-and-greet without having to throw or take a punch, I might take you up on that. Stick close. If somebody says something else dumb, I’m turning to you.”
sometimes when i am sad i go read through the tags on this post, because they are 70% other biologists saying things like “AND ALSO FUCK FIELD MICE” and “THAT CRAB ALMOST BROKE MY FINGER” and I am reassured that I am not the only one who has bobbled a wood frog right into their cleavage.
plus six or seven people who just….can’t figure out what a frog paper could possibly be. (guys it’s…a scientific paper. about frogs.)
I’m enjoying the tags/replies discussing the proper conjugation of “to yeet.” I am in favor of the decision that the future perfect is “will have yitten.”
Expanding this, NASA has a few gems from their report language:
“Underwent unplanned rapid disassembly” – it exploded, and it wasn’t an explosion we wanted to happen
“Lithobraking maneuver” – it stopped because it hit the goddamned ground.
“Engine-rich exhaust” – the engine bell melted or evaporated, or the engine ejected itself out the back of the rocket without having a very good reason to do so.
“Fishing orbit” – the craft is in the ocean instead of space and we didn’t mean to put it there
“Thrust was observed along an undesired vector” – the engine leaked and the rocket spun off into oblivion.
“Wearing his manager hat” – a moron who shouldn’t be an engineer (a reference to the infamous quote “take off your engineer hat and put on your manager hat” in the meeting in which the Challenger was cleared for launch)
on the subject of Humans Are Space Orcs i keep thinking it would be funny if ‘pursuit predator’ humans got together with an ‘ambush predator’ feliform species. and like. humans enjoy walking around with their friends! and the feliforms enjoy huddling in a concealed location with their friends! and it takes all of half an hour for a human to pick up a scarf and make a sling to take their pal with them while they go grab some lunch.
our new friends are like ‘are you sure this isn’t an inconvenience’ and the humans are like ‘are you kidding we do this with terran cats whether they like it or not’
also the team-up of humans and the feliform species gives most herbivore species in the galaxy screaming nightmares because here is a mobile tower that will follow you for 16 hours straight and it’s carrying a bag full of sneaky murder like it’s a baby this is not okay
With the revelation of his son’s survival comes the sudden death of Darth Vader.
One night, he dreams of teaching a sandy haired boy how to swim in the lake on Naboo and when he wakes up, all that darkness and hate and rage is nowhere to be found.
And so, Anakin Skywalker makes new choices.
He goes to Kamino, where he knows Palpetine has his DNA on file, and orders the techs to clone his damaged organs and limbs (all but the right hand. He’s too used to the mech), and he spends almost a year there, letting them mend his long-broken body. It’s painful, but Anakin Skywalker is nothing if not used to pain.
And he speaks to no one. No one knows where he is. Palpetine either doesn’t know and is furious, or knows and doesn’t care. Most think he’s died, and the Rebellion celebrates, but they’ve still got a sith lord ruling the galaxy so not too hard.
And when the techs finish, Anakin Skywalker looks in the mirror at his less-pale but still deeply scarred face, at his long limbs and for the first time in two decades takes a long, deeply breath.
And disappears.
He steals an unmarked ship.
He finds a swampy planet that seems to be relatively uninhabited.
And he breathes.
Until one day, while in meditation, settled on the marshy grown, something pokes his knee.
And when Anakin Skywalker cracks an eye open to see what is disturbing his meditation, he freezes.
Because the wizened, green old Jedi standing there with his cane nudging the former sith looks both incredibly pleased to see him but also not pleased at all.
“A debt do you owe this galaxy, Skywalker,” Yoda tells him. “Hide, you must not from your responsibilities.”
“I’ve done enough damage for a few lifetimes, Master Yoda,” Anakin responds.
Yoda huffs and sits next to him, looking at the swamp. “Blind were the Jedi, to your troubles.”
“No. I made choices.”
“And one more you must make,” Yoda says. “Come calling, destiny always does.”
Above them, the sound of a starfighter breaking atmo cracks through the calm of the Degobah swamp, and the presence of its pilot sings through the Force, right in Anakin Skywalker’s ears.
He sighs deeply. “Kriff.”
It earns him a smack upside the head from Yoda’s cane.
“Language, young Skywalker,” the old Jedi chuckles. “Or a bad influence on your son you will be.”
The fun thing is he would understand why people were getting him outfits with storks on them. That’s a word, it’s his name, straightforward. All the humans get him the same gag gift, but like, they’re putting effort in at least. This is a genuinely nice outfit. Stork will be a walking zero-effort pun sometimes, rather than waste a perfectly fine robe.
It’s fine. This is a readily comprehensible human illogic. Exactly the kind of thing he expected from moving to Earth.
Six years in he finds out about the stork bringing babies.
Stork has a good long meditation session about this myth, his name, his job, the outfits, the whole shebang (or whatever Vulcan concept is the equivalent).
And he decides he’s honored by it, in a humanly illogical way.
The humans are asking him to do what is after all his job, and specifically requesting him for the joy his name brings them on top of an already agreeable and satisfying task. He has no objection to engendering positive emotions in others. Harm hastens the heat-death of the universe, Surak teaches, so happiness must logically slow it down.
Plus, Vulcans of his generation love puns. There were two decades of punning competitions in colleges across the planet. So when he realizes that he is a walking zero-effort pun, and that the humans also love the pun, he is all for it. He is the Joe Cool of the entire Vulcan population in his city.
And via this pun, the humans are including him in a cherished and traditional myth, by casting him as the literal bringer of life and the expander of families.
There’s no downside. Stork wears his robes, pins, keychains, and other bird-related tchotchkes with genuine pride.
For real though working together with some human social workers, a Vulcan would be an excellent caretaker for children in an adoption center.
Child has a meltdown? Imagine Stork, perfectly calm and unbothered, approaching the kid and saying “You appear quite upset, Eliza. If you would please allow me to relocate you to the ‘bean-bag-chair,’ we can discuss the source of your distress.”
A Vulcan educated in medicine and child psychology would be endlessly patient with a kid with behavioral issues. Stork wouldn’t get or upset or frustrated. After all, these are children with medical and psychological conditions. It would be illogical to blame the child or to not treat them with the appropriate care.
Even if the a little one was having a bad day or was just overtired, Stork wouldn’t get angry. He might even be a calming presence. Any new kids acting out would learn real quick that they’d have better luck trying to arm-wrestle a Klingon than get a rise out of Stork.
Not only that, Vulcans live much longer than humans. Imagine Stork looking virtually unchanged as decades pass. Kids he’d helped years ago would turn up fully grown, maybe there to adopt their own kids, and run into Stork, looking almost exactly as they remember him.
And he’d probably remember them too. “Welcome back, Eliza.”
When Danny woke up, it was to a cold, dark room he's never been in, filled with the sounds of desperate and afraid children around his age or younger than him.
He doesn't remember exactly how he got here. One second he was walking home from school, late again because of his usual bullies, and the next thing he knows he's waking up here with a sharp pain in his neck.
"Where are we?" He asks nobody in particular through the dryness of his throat.
"We-we were kidnapped," the kid next to him answers. Danny can't see much in the dark, but he can hear that the kid has been crying recently. His voice is stopped up in a way only tears and allergies can cause.
"Us? Why?" Danny asks, confused. Nobody outside of his family would ever want him. He's just some quirkless nobody who wants to go to space. He's only ten, but he's known the world is not kind to people like him since he was four.
"I think-I th-think it's to take us somewhere else," the other kid gets out around his stuttering. "I heard one of the guards talking about fighting underground."
"That doesn't make any sense," Danny tells him. He feels the other kid shrug his shoulders before leaning tiredly into Danny's side.
"Unless they mean underground in the same way heroes are underground."
"What do you mean?"
"Some heroes don't like people so they're never on the news," this new kid explains. "They fight in the middle of the night in dark and scary places, and save people that way."
"How come I've never heard of them?" Danny wondered allowed. He's always been obsessed with heroes, Thirteen being his favorite of course. His passion for heroes and saving people almost matched his passion for space. He's just so in awe of somebody having the power to help others. It's something he's always kind of wanted, at least in a physical sense.
"They gotta keep themselves secret," the boy leaning on him explains. "They can't be popular like All Might because then all their secrets won't be secrets anymore, and then they'd have a harder time fighting."
"Huh. That sounds...Kind of nice, actually. Do you wanna be a hero when you grow up?"
"Yeah! Just like All Might!"
"I think I wanna be a hero too, now. But maybe I'll be one of these underground guys."
-------
Shouta Aizawa was straight up not having a great time.
For two weeks now he's been on this case of quirkless kids all over the city being kidnapped, and he and Tsukauchi have really been the only ones working on it. It makes his blood boil, knowing that there are people in this police department so willing to turn a blind eye to innocent children over genetics they can't control.
He's in the middle of talking logistics with Tsukauchi when the doors to the police department are slammed open.
Shouta could recognize the Fentons anywhere. They're well known for their top of the line support gear, but even more wildly popular for their opinions and experiments concerning the supernatural. And because they own that gaudy building with the neon sign that lights up the entire block.
Maddie Fenton makes eye contact with him, and she marches over to him looking like a thunderstorm incarnate. Her teal eyes flash dangerously, and it's not hard to see her rippling muscles under her jumpsuit. Shouta straightens at the sight of her, and even more so at the sight of her husband just a step behind her, huge and lumbering and just as angry, just as worried.
"Are you Eraserhead?" Maddie demands. Shouta nods his head and carefully sets down the papers he's holding before turning fully to face the Fenton parents. There's a small red headed girl who peaks out from behind her father's leg, looking up at him with the same bright eyes as her mother.
"What can I help you with?" he asks them, keeping his voice in his usual careful monotone.
"Our-our son was taken," Maddie says, and her voice cracks as she speaks but she firmly holds his gaze, unphased by her vocal cords betraying her. "And nobody is doing anything about it. I have been screaming myself blue trying to get anybody in this godforsaken place to care. it took me nearly forty minutes to be directed to you. So-please. Just help me find my baby."
Shouta glances back at Tsukauchi, who comes around and stands next to Shouta.
"Ma'am, does your child happen to be quirkless?" The detective asks. At the parent's hesitant nod, Tsukauchi moves back around to the other side of his desk. "Please, tell me everything you know."
-----------
"Izuku," Danny whispers.
"Hm?"
"We should-we should be heroes."
"That would be cool. Maybe we could open up our own agency together. Call it the-the All Might Jr. and Thirteen's Rover Agency."
"No, not like that. Well, maybe. But that's not what I'm talking about. You said earlier only one guard usually shows up to check on us, right?" Izuku nods into his shoulder. "Well, the way I see it, is, there's a bunch of us, and only one of him. It wouldn't be hard to surprise him and take his keys or something. Besides, we're all-we're all quirkless. There's no guarantee that the police will help, or any of the heroes."
"Except All Might. And Thirteen," Izuku replies quietly. "But then what, Danny?" Izuku asks. He lifts his head off Danny's shoulder and turns to face them, though they can really only see the dim outline of each other. "If we get past the guard, what happens after that?"
He's not opposed to the idea, Danny can tell. He's just scared of the unknown, and Danny is too, but he's more afraid of the unknown that comes with being moved away from his family. That certainly outweighs the fear of another guard or two running down the hall.
"I think-we can make a plan. But we'll probably need everyone in here to help."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. So, here's what I was thinking..."
----------
Daniel "Danny" Fenton was kidnapped two days ago on his way home from school during one of the busiest times of the day, which meant that it was probably done at the mouth of an alley way, and that they had means of a quick escape.
There are only a handful of alleys like that in the area Danny was taken, and Shouta gets lucky on the third.
There's a latch under the huge dumpster that he manages to crawl under and through. it's locked, but it's also older and rusted, and it doesn't take much effort to break. So with the help of his lithe frame, he squeezes through and drops down into the sewer.
It's an area he recognizes from one of his first missions on his own. He knows there's a door to his left that leads to a whole underground network where a dog fighting ring took place, and when that was taken down, an illegal quirk fighting ring.
It makes him sick to his stomach thinking that might happen to all of the quirkless kids that were kidnapped.
He quickly updates Tsukauchi, and without waiting for backup, he goes in.
-------------
Danny makes sure he's the first one the guard sees when he opens the door. The light is blinding and makes his eyes sting, but he holds his ground.
"Who are you?" He asks. The guard looks down at him, unimpressed.
"Eat," he says, before throwing a Tupperware container of some unknown food down at Danny's feet. The lid pops off and some of the contents scatter.
"I asked you a question," Danny says, crossing his arms and popping his hip out in the same way Jazz does when she demands an answer.
"Listen," the guard says, taking a couple steps inside. He absolutely towers over Danny's small frame. "I don't have time for useless runts like you. So you're going to eat," he growls, pointing at the food on the floor, "or you're going to starve. I don't particularly care which one happens."
"That doesn't answer my question."
"That's it, you little-"
Before he can finish his sentence, he quickly grabs his crotch in pain, and drops to his knees. Danny and the other kids waste no time in taking him down to the floor, biting and punching and kicking until the man is nothing but a groaning mess.
"That was a good kick," he tells Izuku, who had snuck up behind the man while Danny was talking to him.
"Let's grab his keys and see if we can find the way out," Izuku says.
Out in the bright hallway, it's easy to see how many of them there are now. It's not just a cacophony of cries coming from some faceless source. There are a dozen of them, all dirty and a little scuffed up. But now that they're all out of that room, despair is turning into hope.
"I woke up when they brought me here," one kid says. "I think I sort of remember the way."
"Come on, then," Izuku says encouragingly. The kid nods, and joins them at the front of the group.
"Let's get out of here."
----------
Shouta has taken down his fair share of underground groups. Drug dealers, fighting rings, illegal support equipment manufacturing, you name it, he's taken care of it.
But this has to be the oddest fucking thing he's seen out of all of them.
He's taken down a handful of guards here and there before they can alert the others to his presence, but to find a single guard or two already knocked out and beaten to hell is a new one. And he knows for a fact he's the only hero on the scene at the moment.
He quickly shakes off the surprise though and heads further into the hallway. He follows the trail of unconscious bodies.
But then, when he quietly rounds a corner, he's immediately met with twelve small, pissed off children.
There is fire in their eyes and anger fueling every motion their body does. It's why the little dark haired one lunges at him without looking, almost taking him by surprise. He tries to ram his head into Shouta's crotch, and he can't help but realize that's probably how all of those other guys went down. Shouta steps back and grabs the kid by the shoulders, holding him at arm's length as he gets down on all of their levels. He's never seen such angry blue eyes before.
"Hey, hey, it's alright," he tells him, voice as gentle and soothing as he can make it. The kid, however does not look convinced. "I'm a hero. My name is Eraserhead."
A little green haired kid perks up from the side. He looks like the most skittish thing to walk the planet but he steps up and speaks up anyway. "Eraserhead? Like, the underground hero?"
"Not very many people have heard of me," Shouta tells him, genuinely impressed.
"Where's your card?" the boy his grasp asks.
"It's in my pocket. I can show it to you, if you want. But you have to promise not to try and hit me again. Deal?"
"And if you're lying?"
"Then you can hit me all you want. I promise."
"Fine."
Shouta releases the boy and slowly reaches into his belt and pulls out his wallet, and then his hero license. He hands it over to the dark haired boy, who glances at it before handing it to the green haired one. He hands it back with a nod, and a relieved smile, and the dark haired one relaxes immediately.
"What are your names?" Shouta asks them before tucking his license away again.
"I'm Danny, and that's Izuku," Danny says. The other children give their names, too, but it's obvious it's these two who are have been leading the charge.
"It's nice to meet you. Now, follow me. The way I came in through it this way."
He takes hold of Izuku and Danny's hands, and with them going, all of them follow. They thankfully don't run into any more trouble on the way out. It looks like the operation hadn't quite started yet, and it was just in its beginning phases.
The entire way there, the boys talk about the hero agency they're going to open up when they become pros, occasionally asking Shouta for his input since he himself is one. It's would have been almost fun if it weren't for the circumstances.
"I understand All Might Jr," Shouta tells them when they're near the exit. "But why Rover for you?"
"Because those are the machines they send to space, and I'm gonna be an astronaut one day!" Danny says excitedly. "I'm gonna play with aliens and help Thirteen beat up bad guys!"
"Well, I know for a fact Thirteen would appreciate your help, Rover."
Danny's eyes absolutely sparkle at being called his potential hero name, so he concedes and calls Izuku by All Might Jr. The sparkly eyes he gets in return make it worth it.
Eventually they exit, going back in the way Shouta came, though the dumpster has thankfully been moved. The police and paramedics are there, taking the kids from Shouta as he helps them all out.
He speaks with the boys and their parents as they exchange contact information so Izuku and Danny can hang out once everything has calmed down.
And when they're done, he puts a hand on each of their shoulders.
"I'll see you when you get to U.A. okay?"
He's expecting an earsplitting scream of excitement to burst his eardrums.
Instead, he's nearly strangled by how hard they hug him. He hides his smile in his scarf as he hugs them back, ruffles their hair, and waves goodbye before going back to Tsukauchi.
-----------------
Five years later, on the first day of the new semester. Izuku Midoriya broke his finger with his outrageously powerful quirk, and Danny Fenton can fly and shoot lasers out of his hands.
They remember him. It's obvious by the look in their eyes that they remember him, so it's no surprise when he gets a knock on his office door after school has ended.
"Rover, All Might Jr," he greets dryly.
"Eraserhead," Danny greets, and although he's nervous, he grins at Shouta all the same. "We, uh..." Izuku steps forward, placing a hand on Danny's shoulder.
hi hi, so i noticed some people have trouble with identifying/understanding how the tabby gene works, so i thought i would make an easy guide for you!!
*Note - all red cats are tabbies. There is no such thing as a “solid” red or cream cat. If a red/cream cat appears solid, it is because they are a ticked tabby.
There are, in essence, 2 tabby patterns - Mackerel (tiger stripes) and Classic (blotched). The other tabby patterns seen in cats are gene modifiers that affect the tabby gene and change it.
Most dominant to most recessive -
Ticked
Spotted
Mackerel
Classic
Ticked Tabbies
The color on the hair shafts alternates, giving these cats a “salt-and-pepper” look. The ticking gene “masks” the regular tabby gene on the body, which is why ticked tabbies still have stripes on their face, tail, and legs - these are called residual markings.
Agouti Tabby
If a kit inherits 2 copies of the ticking gene (meaning both parents are ticked), then they will NOT have the residual markings. These cats will have a light underside and dark back/body. This is most evident in breeds like the Somali, Abyssinian, and Singapura!
(this kitty has the black ticking along her spine, forehead and tail, but doesn’t have any tabby stripes!)
Charcoal Tabby
The charcoal tabby is a wild variation of the agouti gene that causes a random distribution of black on the pelt. Charcoal tabbies are most common in the Bengal & Savannah breeds, and they have very distinct facial markings. NOT to be confused with smoke tabbies. The tabby gene usually shows through the ticking, although the ticking is still evident.
Spotted Tabbies
The spotted tabby gene “breaks up” the tabby pattern into spots. These spots follow the fur direction and can vary in size. Since this gene “modifies” the regular tabby gene, these kitties still have horizontal stripes on their legs, tail and face. This tabby type is pretty common and is seen most in the Ocicat, Egyptian Mau and British Shorthair!
Rosetted Tabby
There are many different variations of the rosette gene (arrow, pawprint, donut, cloud). This is a spotted tabby with the agouti gene, which causes the hairs in the center to be lighter and ticked. These markings look like leopard spots and are almost exclusive to the Bengal breed.
Mackerel Tabby
This is the most common and familiar tabby type. This is also the “default” tabby type. These kitties have “tiger stripes” on their body. Stripes can vary in closeness and size by individual
Broken Mackerel Tabby
These mackerel tabbies stripes break and sometimes form “spots” or bars, but don’t be fooled - this is still a mackerel tabby. These tabbies are also very common
(see how the stripes break up into spots on the shoulder and near the stomach??)
Braided Tabby
In the Toyger breed, the mackerel tabby gene has been modified to create thicker and more wavering lines to resemble a tiger. This is called “candle-flame” or braided.
Classic Tabby
This is the recessive form of the mackerel tabby, and is also pretty common. The classic tabby markings will spiral and create big blotches of pattern on the body. An ideal classic tabby has a “bulls-eye spiral” on their side and is most often seen in the Maine Coon or British Shorthair!
Marbled Tabby
Sometimes also called a Clouded Tabby, these cats are a modified version of the classic tabby. Agouti (ticked) hairs appear in the center of the tabby stripes, usually in the bulls-eye, which gives them a two-toned tabby look. This is evident in breeds like the Bengal and Sokoke!
OTHER TABBY PATTERNS
Lynx Point
This is a colorpoint cat with the tabby gene. Colorpoints have partial-albinism that causes the cooler parts of their body to develop color, such as the face, tail and legs. These tabbies can come in any of the other tabby patterns ^ and paired with the colorpoint gene. These cats will display tabby markings where there is pigment.
Torbie / Tabico / Caliby
This is a tabby-tortie, or tabby-calico. These cats are also sometimes called patched tabbies. They can come in any tabby variation ^ . These cats display two or 3 colors (black & red, blue & cream, chocolate, cream & white etc) and also have the tabby gene. These can sometimes be hard to identify against regular tabbies because the colors can blend and mix to be almost indistinguishable. They will carry the same tabby marking all over
Smoke Tabby
This is a tabby cat with the smoke gene. The smoke gene is a variation of silver, where the roots of the hair are pigmentless. These cats usually have a dark face mask and darker paws and tail. They can come in any tabby pattern
When Batman first started as a vigilante a certain percentage of the people of Gotham thought he was a demon or spirit or entity of some kind. Some of those people started to pray to him or even leave offerings on rooftops or fire escapes. The number of Gotham citizens that actually pray to him is fairly small but the number who believe he will protect them, who mutter under their breath "Batman will fix it" as their leaving the house the day after an Arkham breakout is very large.
Because magic and belief can work even when unknown or unacknowledged, Batman technically qualifies as a minor deity even though he doesn't know about it.
People have mostly prayed to him for protection and more specifically for the protection of children (especially after the Robins showed up).
Between his own actions and the belief of the people he is the patron deity of Gotham, of those in need of protection (particularly children) and of adoption.
Batmans strong belief that he is human keeps him human and he doesn't notice the minor boost magic is giving him. Like how no one ever sees him when he doesn't want to be seen or how he heals just a bit faster than the norm. It happens gradually over time as he gains more followers and he blames it on his training and on gaining experience as a vigilante .
Meanwhile, Danny needs a new home because of his parents and/or the GIW catching him and experimenting on him.
He escaped and went to Clockwork for help. Clockwork is one of his ghostly guardians but Danny needs human or at least human adjacent parents because of his human half.
Clockwork/Kronos wants to make 100% sure Danny is protected and happy in his new home. As a god himself, knowing Danny's power level and wanting to make sure whoever takes him in can keep up with Danny and offer him the safety he needs, Clockwork decides Danny needs a godly parent in the human world. His own children would be an option... except his relationship with them is still a bit... strained (hard to have a healthy family relationship after trying to eat your kids).
So he looks to other pantheons and after carefully considering the options, he chooses a deity that is still mostly human (perfect for Danny who was so recently entirely human and still learning about his ghost half), who is a God of protection (he can keep Danny safe especially in his own city where he's at his most powerful) and most importantly who is a God of adoption (who better to take in a child in need?). He chooses Batman.
The absolute chaos in the batfamily when the God of Time shows up and explains he wants Batman to adopt Danny because he is literally the God of having an adoption problem.
Everyone knows who Phantom is. He was one of the very first heroes though he inexplicably chose to dedicate his life (metaphorically) to micromanaging the hell out of some random town no one has ever heard of. He's a specialist hero, only really useful for ghost stuff. He comes every time someone contacts him for help but it's only happened a few times in all of his years of operation.
Then, kid heroes become a thing. Robin, once perpetually hidden beneath the shadow of the bat emerges into the metropolis sun just in time to make the front page.
When Batman's child-raising skills are called into question, Kid Flash is brought out at a press release by Flash to show that these exceptional children are around. They just aren't common knowledge for their own health (aside from the villains - being a child star wrecks your brain).
A few villains do come forward and say "no, the sidekicks will go out on their own if their hero doesn't let them. And they have all the powers and none of the restraint. Please don't separate them."
(Batman and Robin are both very flattered that all their rogues think they have powers. Robin is ✨glowing✨ with pride.)
Cyborg calls Robin at 3am. He asks if he's seen the new 'BooTube' page.
Phantom has set up his own website. It's a dark and moody ripoff of YouTube with 1 channel. His.
Introduction Video: Transcript
Hi guys, I can't lie to you, I was as up-in-arms as anyone when I saw what people are now calling "The Robin Reveal". But then I remembered that I started my hero work when I was mentally and physically fourteen years old...
Danny doesn't mention he was also chronologically 14 at the time. Secret identities and all.
...and I had no mentor, no training and no backup. It was just me and two humans, neither of whom even had powers at that time. I understand the call, in a way that none of the non-hero people criticising you could ever hope to comprehend.
I'm glad to see most of you fellow child-heroes have an experienced adult watching your back. But if you don't. If there's even one of you out there who need a mentor, consider Amity Park open for business, and consider adding my number to your speedial. I'm not like those people in interviews saying "Oh, someone needs to help the children!" I am helping you, I am helping you whenever you need with whatever you want.
The ghost swallows and seemingly forces down his brimming sincerity.
And for those of you who do already have backup? Consider checking back here. I'm going over my old reports from my first few years on the streets to see what I most needed to hear, and what I wished I knew sooner. Hopefully no one else will have to learn what I know the hard way.
You know how to fight, this channel won't be for that. This is about coping with secret identities, and the messed up situations that can only happen to a vigilante or hero.
Anyways, the first video is already ready to be edited so in a few days I'll be back here to discuss what you do when you've been cloned. How to deal with that emotionally and physically. My clone isn't very well known outside of my town but I think she'll add a great perspective!
Within weeks, without his knowledge, Danny is somehow remote-mentoring heroes of all ages.
Oh, my time has come. I have a TON of worldbuilding around this idea!!! but haven't gotten around to writing it because I've got so many WIPs. Also it's all a little too close to home since I know how these kinds of companies operate from the inside. And also it's depressing as much as it's funny. Really it should endgame be getting ballot initiatives to pass better laws for gig economy workers and everyone gets to sue for lost wages and gets better working conditions.
So it goes something like this:
The company originally starts off branding themselves as Hexer, and Geralt is an early adopter--so much so that when the company changes it's name to Witchyr, everyone still calls him the old school Hexer and he gets a special badge on his profile showing that he's been there from the beginning and he gets a slightly better default tipping rate.
Jaskier was approached by the company's co-founder in the first few years of the company getting started. The cofounder asks to buy the rights to his semi-viral indie song, 'Toss a Coin' so they could use it for their website and other marketing purposes. Jaskier was poor and just got done with college and a few thousand dollars sounds pretty great. Cue 8 years later, he now gets no royalties from a company that's now valued at millions of dollars and he's forced to sit through unskippable ads featuring his bastardized song when he's trying to stream anything online.
Which means Jaskier's always been a little bitter about the company and refused to download the app. But he ends up relenting because a godling is squatting in his and Priscilla's apartment and eats all his chocolate and spoils the ending of Game of Thrones for him and that's how he meets Geralt.
Aretzua is a coding academy and there's this throughline of magic and software engineering I haven't connected yet, but the Witchyr company is run by Stregobor and Vilgefortz, funded by venture capitalist Phillippa and populated with various sorceresses and mages helping with training and other ancillary support. They're aided by hardware and proprietary software to help people complete contracts.
Yen is a trans, disabled magical software engineer who fucked off to do consultant work because she got tired of working for megacorp Broiklon. She will eventually poke around the Witchyr platform and reveal how much the company has been stealing Witchyrs tips which becomes a huge controversy (see Instacart and the team who developed Para for DoorDash drivers to see how much of their tips they were actually getting).
The Witchyr app includes software add-ons that Witchyrs have to pay a monthly fee for, but the longer they've been with the platform the more discounts they get.
'Cause you see the majority of Witchyrs are actually not mutants. There's a handful of mutated witchers left, but that's where the app and other hardware comes in to help with all the training.
This is gonna keep getting long..cause like I said I have a ton of notes. Read on for Witchyr Signs and medallions, Ciri and Emhyr, and a public beef between Dudu and Whoreson Junior.
Witchyr medallion is part of the internal app witchyrs use and allows them to track monsters and log other environmental discrepancies. However, when you get to a place that has shitty cell service, witchyrs will find the tracking won't work anymore and the mages have to work to write an offline version of the program.
Witchyr Signs - a cybernetic-type of glove whose power is tied to the level the witchyr is at based on their profile information on the platform. The more difficult contracts they close, the more they'll level up and gain access to more power for their work. Axii is disabled fairly quickly from the gauntlet for various legal reasons that no one is allowed to disclose.
Lambert gets banned from the platform because he helped a witchyr hack his gauntlet to get access to more powerful Signs that he wasn't levelled up or trained for and something happens with a contract there's another lawsuit and shit got messy. Despite the ban Lambert keeps creating new profiles and they have a dedicated support person to keep closing out his accounts like a whack-a-mole because he keeps buying new phones and VPNs to get around the various ways they've banned him.
Now there's some alchemists/herbalists that Witchyr works with to provide the mutants and non-mutant Witchyr with potions. Triss is the liaison between the company and these small and medium businesses. Regis has an apocathcary and he has a contract with Witchyr to provide his goods and services. But of course Witchyr pays Regis a shitty, shitty rate for the potions he supplies, but it's OKAY because they make up for the difference by giving Regis and others a TON MORE ORDERS than he never would have had if he wasn't working with Witchyr.
Triss is supposed to perform quality control on his products and keep him happy to keep working with the company, but she learns more from him and enjoys working with him more than working with Witchyr, but Regis can't afford to take her on as an official employee so it just ends up being a nice developing friendship and a fraught business relationship when Witchyr is going through a lean season and not giving him enough orders, or requiring he makes the potions a certain way and use certain supplies. There's so many hoops to jump through to stay in this kind of business relationship.
Emhyr and Ciri have a strange and painful relationship that in my mind parallels Lisa Brennan Jobs and Steve Jobs (Lisa's memoir about her childhood is a very specific and insidious kind of father/daughter dysfunction that not many people talk about, and everyone in Lisa's life disputes her account. The gaslighting is awful.) The way Emhyr shows interests in his daughter's life ends up being awkward and alienating and always on his terms. In my head I think she meets Geralt by accident in this AU, not really bound by Destiny but it ends up feeling like destiny afterwards. That part I don't have sketched out as much as others.
Looking at the rest of my notes I also thought it would be hilarious if Dudu is still a doppler in this modern with magic AU, and ends up becoming a comedian of some renown, based on his early days doing sketch comedy. Really great with humorous impressions and physical comedy (think Bill Hader and Steve Martin). He ends up doing a full-body impression of Whoreson Junior that is hilarious and humiliating. And Whoreson Junior ends up using the app to call a Witchyr on Dudu and it becomes a viral hit for the platform and online beef (Dudu's online handle is Penstock, of course.)
I never found my notebook last January/Feb when I was working on this but I definitely had drawn wireframe designs for the app even though I'm not a product designer, lmao. TOO MUCH WORLDBUILDING not enough writing.
If anyone wants to write anything about this AU 100000% feel free to riff on any of my ideas or ask me anything about how these kinds of tech companies work.
“At the drop of a coin Witchyr brings a hero to your doorstep who rescues you from creatures, fiends, and the monstrous dust bunnies under your bed!” -Novigrad Times
Omg @kuwdora this is all gold. The mages v witchers exploitative relationship wow that’s exactly how you can imagine it working in modern times. I’m gonna be thinking about this post for the foreseeable future. Also I love when people don’t forget Dudu and they let him thrive.
Danny Phantom reveal scenarios! Which do you think would make it easier for people to believe: Danny transforming into Phantom or Phantom transforming into Danny?
Honestly I think it would depend on the situation. Like, if Phantom is in trouble and tries to save himself by confessing and turning back into Danny, I could see it being taken as a desperate ghost spontaneously developing a new power, as he has been known to do. Likewise, if Danny acted out of character (or seemed to from the perspective of those not in the know) prior to turning into Phantom, I could see it being taken as a trick.
No idea how well this will work, but I figure it’s worth trying, so here goes.
I have recently gotten into The Witcher fandom. I have watched two episodes, have no plans to watch further, or read the books, and have only tentative plans to someday play TW3, but that hasn’t stopped me from binge reading fics. Along the way I have learned of the existence and seen the usage of the Witcher sign of Axii a few times, but not many fics focus on it, and those that do are all either very kinky, or very short, sometimes both. I would really like to see a fairly long fic exploring trust through the consensual use of Axii. I have some ideas, which I will outline below, but I really don’t want to write it myself.
>Start with Geralt needing to Axii Jaskier for some reason. My thoughts go along the lines of the creature(s) Geralt is fighting having some sort of compulsion ability, and Jaskier getting a little too close. Geralt uses Axii to counteract it, and Jaskier has a very confusing 10-15 minutes.
>Afterwards, Jaskier is uncomfortable, but can’t figure out why. Eventually, he figures out that while he has always trusted Geralt, and Geralt has never abused that trust, he didn’t know about Axii, and thus was giving Geralt more trust than he realized. His trust was given under false pretenses. Once he figures that out, he decides it’s stupid. After all, Jaskier can see exactly why a Witcher wouldn’t go around telling people, even friends, about how they can mind control people, and regardless of whether Jaskier knew what he was trusting Geralt with Geralt has never abused that trust. He has definitely earned the trust by now. But just deciding a natural reaction is stupid doesn’t mean you immediately get over it.
>They talk about it. Either one could bring it up - maybe Geralt, being perceptive of physical reactions, can’t help but notice Jaskier’s discomfort. Maybe Jaskier, being an open and talkative person, worked out the above emotional stuff by talking aloud. Either way, they talk, somehow Geralt comes to the idea of offering to teach Jaskier to resist magical compulsion. This, of course, involves a lot of Axii. Jaskier accepts, because 1) consciously he does trust Geralt, and there’s no better way of showing that than letting himself be Axii’d repeatedly, and 2) being able to shrug of Axii will soothe the little unconscious bit that can’t help but be uncomfortable around mind control.
>The fic would then go for at least a few chapters with Jaskier building up resistance. I imagine step one is not resisting a compulsion at all, but learning to recognize when someone/thing is trying to compel you. Geralt might cast Axii at random through the day, and Jaskier has to tell how many times he did it when they’re setting up camp. It’s not until Jaskier starts to get fairly accurate with that that Geralt would actually give him a suggestion. And then they have to decide what to use, because resisting a compulsion to do something you already want to do is a lot harder than something you don’t, but being unable to resist a compulsion to do something you hate would be torture, so they have to pick something Jaskier doesn’t want to do, but also wouldn’t mind doing. Maybe a camp chore, like gathering firewood? Added incentive: if you successfully resist, you don’t have to finish the chore! Eventually they’d build up to resisting a compulsion to do something he does want to do, because it’s a necessary part of the skill. After all, I’m sure there’s some creature or spell out there (probably several) that can worm their way into a person’s mind by starting out with compulsions that aren’t out of character. Better to shake off such things before they get a foothold.
>After Jaskier has gained some resistance, he gets over his discomfort. Being a bard, he then starts to get creative. He might request Geralt use Axii to make him forget a song that’s stuck in his head, because it’s interfering his composition of another song. Geralt might resist, might point out “surely this isn’t the first time this has happened.” And Jaskier would reply “no, of course not, but on my own I’d have to set aside the new composition until this song fades on its own, but I’d really like to have it done for the next town! It’s not like I’ll forget it forever, Geralt. Even if I can’t shake of the Axii, I’ve got the cursed thing written down right here! It’s my own song! At the worst, I can always learn it again.”
>After a few such requests, Geralt starts to realize that Jaskier really is comfortable with this. Starts to trust that Jaskier doesn’t feel betrayed, and isn’t going to leave. He grows comfortable enough to get some ideas of his own:
Jaskier (whispering): “Did you just Axii me to be quiet?!”
Geralt (also whispering): “You can push past it if you need to, and this way you won’t forget.”
Jaskier (still whispering): “Alright, fair point.”
No idea where it goes from there. Honestly, don’t really have any ideas of other times/ways Geralt might use Axii spontaneously, even provided he had Jaskier’s trust and knew he could shake it off if needed. I just think this could be a cool way to explore the different ways and the depth at which these two trust each other. There could easily be other forms of trust worked into the story too. I just also really like Axii.
My favorite “humans are space orcs” idea is that trope where aliens kidnap some humans for their zoo, except it ends up like Jurassic Park. And the poor Alien Humanologists who were invited to the park are like:
“You mean you locked up a pack of curious, highly competitive persistence predators with NO enrichment in the enclosure? You FOOLS! If you had bothered to throw a basketball or half a box of Legos in there, KE-X9 would still be alive!
“Well of course they climbed the retaining wall! Did you think to study their evolutionary lineage AT ALL?”
The humans would find a way to use the basketball and legos to escape. I mean one time a guy somehow escaped from a prison in Mexico without breaking any laws so his escape would be legal so honestly given enough time the Jurassic park situation is inevitable.
Jurassic Park would be awesome, but now that I think about it I also kind of love love the idea of humans as the alien zoo equivalent of those octopuses that climb out of their tanks and wander around taste-testing other exhibits or throwing sub-par shrimp at handlers.
Like they’re totally unable to figure out what’s happening because the cameras keep going out, but every night things get moved, or stolen, exhibits are disappearing, WHAT IS GOING ON, they’ve moved facilities twice and it’s still happening, are they haunted, are the ancestors angry, WHAT IS HAPPENING!?
And then a weary humanologist is all ‘… your humans are getting out’.
“That is impossible.”
“They’re getting out.”
“That enclosure is COMPLETELY SECURE.”
“And yet somehow they’re getting out.”
“THE HUMANS ARE NOT GETTING OUT.”
“Oh yeah? I bet you twenty glarks they’re getting out. Stay after closing time with me and I’ll show you.”
*next day*
“… the humans were getting out.”
“… why did they keep going back in, then?!”
(In a deeply embarrassed mumble) “They said they weren’t going to escape until they finished their behavioural experiments. Uh. On us.”