Shitpost Collection

I needed a place to store shitposts I wish to revisit bc I hate tagging, so here we are

[capacity2]

You’ll be sitting on my apparatus

[suigintou]

foresees your doom but doesnt say anything

[scarlettaagni]

so i think the solution is to give dachshunds a third pair of legs right in the middle

[crimsonflowerz]

was so well-behaved the dentist let me put my fingers in his mouth too

[party-cat-anthem]

accidentally running over a vampire with my car because they didnt show up on the backup camera

[that-house]

imagine giving head for the first time and you feel your cutie mark coming in. and it’s teeth

[wartips]

shitshit shit. umm no its fine. does anyone see a grenade pin on tbe floor

[triangleguy]

my bad. turns off my perpetual motion dog catapulting machine

[kaihasmoreswagthanyou3]

jerking off is gay because you’re the same gender as yourself

[ovur]

You don't remember my old url....? O-oh.. no its fine. I said its fine! Don't... don't touch me.

[ovur]

*trips while I'm running away and you get a panty shot*

[flunkett]

Huh

[frikinnerd]

Can you believe they tried to monetize this shit

[ovur]

Ok I'll go fuck myself

[rars]

whatever man *walks outside of your render distance*

[2007xbox360-deactivated20211113]

Unassuming woman: Nice, dude. That hot dog is ketchup-pilled AND mustard-pilled

Strange man whose son died in an accident he could have prevented: I guess

[bandalbitch]

heyyyy soo. the execution is tomorrow! yes theyre executing me. Anyway do you think about me ever

[komainucomplex]

blonde people are so scary why cant u have a normal hair color like black or brown or green or green

[lokaror]

Terracotta Girlfriend: *moves half an inch in the dead of night*

[ballwizard]

meows loud as fuck shattering all glass within 3 miles no survivors

[syekick-powers]

extremely underrated subgenre of tumblr post: when someone makes a general statement about something, and another person offers a counter-statement that's just completely nonsensical, and the OP just agrees instantly even if it makes no sense at all

examples:

[ajarofham]

[feliza-navidad]

[gay-mormon-wizard]