Richard + Orcrist (The Hobbit BTS)
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@sienaumber
Richard + Orcrist (The Hobbit BTS)
*video starts*
Welcome back everyone! Today we will be doing a hobbit tier list
*1h yap later*
And that's why i put them all in S tier
Thank you everyone for watching
The consort seems to be very serious in listing all the things he wanted to buy later on
Am open for commissions btw >w<//
the scene that traumatised an entire generation of tumblr users
SHERLOCK 1.01 • A Study in Pink
the reason I don't want to have scuff marks around my charging port
~Blip~
“What exactly are you suggesting?” Fili looked around at the rest of the company. “This is Bilbo we’re talking about. Does anyone here really think that anyone could keep him somewhere he doesn’t want to be?”
“That’s right!” Kili pointed at his brother. “Bilbo kicks ass for breakfast! What’s Thorin gonna do?”
“They’re not as unevenly matched as ye think,” Dwalin replied. “Bilbo’s impressive, aye, but Thorin’s never gone all out with ‘im. Wouldn’t risk hurtin’ him.”
Kili scoffed. “And you think that Bilbo’s ever gone all out with any of us? He slaughtered a whole colony of those giant spiders in Greenwood. Alone! Bilbo’s terrifying!”
There were murmurs of agreement to both points. Their king and burglar were remarkably well matched. It was hard to tell which one would stand victorious if they were to truly clash.
functionally suicidal character saying “I would die for you” to their significant other and its like. I get the sentiment, honey, but if a hot dog vendor told me he’d sell hot dogs for me, I wouldn’t feel very moved now would I
I turned off the TV and immediately pulled up AO3.
Fili: What do you look for in a partner?
Ori: Someone kind
Fili: Okay, but everyone wants someone kind
Ori: Nori and Dwalin didn't
Your ideas are so wonderful and I absolutely love how you think! Since you have such a great imagination I was wondering do you have any headcanons for a fem bagginshield?
In Tolkien's lore, Dwarf-women rarely travel, and when they must, they dress exactly like men to protect themselves from outsiders. For the entire first half of the journey, Bella genuinely believes Thorina is a Dwarven king. Thorina wears heavy iron armor, talks in a gravelly, low register, and keeps her braided beard immaculate. Bella only discovers the truth when Thorina gets injured by Wargs, and Bella has to help Oin dress her wounds. Bella is utterly stunned, not by the fact that Thorina is a woman, but by the realization of how much terrifying, lonely pressure this princess has been carrying to keep her small people safe in a hostile world
Because Dwarf-women are so rare, they are treated with absolute, sacred reverence by their kin, and they choose their mates with extreme caution often never marrying at all. Thorina, consumed by war and exile, had long accepted she would die unwed. When Bella saves her from Azog at the Pine Trees, Thorina experiences a violent, overwhelming shift in her Dwarven instincts. To see a soft, short-lived Halfling woman throw herself in front of a Pale Orc out of pure devotion completely breaks Thorina's stoic defenses. From that night on, Thorina's protective instincts become borderline terrifying; she treats Bella not as a hired thief, but as a sacred treasure that the universe uniquely granted to her
Their cultural views on womanhood clash in hilarious but touching ways. Bella’s idea of a proper woman involves clean aprons, baking flawless seedcakes, and hosting perfect dinner parties. Thorina’s idea of womanhood involves maintaining tactical shield-walls, mining precious gems, and leading men into bloody battle. During quiet nights on the road, Bella tries to teach Thorina how to properly patch clothes using fine, invisible Shire stitches. Thorina, whose giant hands are used to heavy smithing hammers, constantly rips the delicate fabric, growling in frustration. Yet, she sits submissively at Bella's feet for hours, letting the Hobbit scold her, secretly loving the gentle touch of Bella's small fingers against her palms
Because Thorina is a female ruler who defied the odds to reclaim her throne, the young Dwarven girls of Erebor look up to her like a goddess. But they grow equally obsessed with Queen Bella. Bella refuses to let Erebor remain just a cold fortress of war. She creates the first royal greenhouse, imports Shire flowers, and introduces the gruff Dwarven miners to the concept of "Afternoon Tea." The combination of Thorina's iron military rule and Bella’s soft, unyielding domestic management turns Erebor into the most prosperous, culturally unique kingdom in Middle-earth
mermay is long gone, but selkie june could be a thing, couldn't it? maybe selkie september would work better...
anyway, here's a little mermaid AU :D
so this is basically hwo it is
*Bagginshield Cooking*
Bilbo: Okay so just follow my instruction
Thorin: *in warrior stance*
Bilbo: First, beat the eggs
Thorin: *fist smashed the eggs*
Bilbo: Yeah that's it, get the fuck out my kitchen
[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over
More of their 7 babies
I haven’t been very active on Tumblr I swear I’ll lock in 😿
Don’t know what’s better, Thorin knowing that Dwalin likes Nori and they both have deep grumpy yearning conversations about their loves, or Thorin having absolutely no clue about it at all and Dwalin and Nori have a whole ass courtship going on during the quest Thorin doesn’t find out until they reclaim Erebor and Dwalin and Nori kiss in celebration and he’s like “?!!!????!”
Thorin's terms of endearment: My heart, my one, my treasure of treasures
Bilbo's terms of endearment: you idiot, you sap, silly Dwarf, daft King
“A burglar indeed.”
@lesbiankiliel prompted ‘Bilbo pranking Thorin by nicking his crown, Thorin be like “and you said you weren’t a burglar”;
Thanks for the prompt! <3