WWJD: What would Jupiter Do? @silver-millennial - Tumblr Blog

My family wasn't allowed to have "Welcome" mats until I was like 10 years old because I'd get upset and told my mom I didn't want the vampires to find a loophole and use it as an invitation.

fishpondfish

mymusician... oughh my little bug [remembers parasocial relationships are bad] [remembers infantilization is bad] this complete stranger is their own huge bug

catsizeddragon

can't stop reading the last part like a Clickhole headline so I made one

LMAOOOO

"I have a problem with my trans son. Not because he's trans, but because he inhaled all our food like fucking Kirby."

#my teen brother ate SEVEN jr bacon cheese burgers and 2 large fries - i had a salad & regular fries and had to appeal to my parents for the #right to a frosty i was also a teenager and nearly 6ft tall i think had i been raised a cis boy i could have seconds without guilt & shame #i think about that a lot because boys are allowed to eat and are encouraged because their growing bodies need it #i eat a meal a day and do 16hr fasting because they convinced me i cannot judge my own appetite #i want to eat 7 burgers 😔

abandoned-quiche

* (Oh, these parentheses I keep opening?

* (I'm collecting them.

* (Right now, I'm 1,762 parentheses deep.

* (Oh, my precious parentheses... (I don't ever want to close them!

bloodied-dagger

* Oh, these parentheses I keep closing?)

* There’s some guy who keeps opening them.)

* Right now, they think they’re 1,762 parentheses deep…)

* But really? They’re all closed.) Thanks to me.)

#sharing an editable .doc with someone

acidtheater

Most annoying online emotion is "I have a funny personal anacdote to add to this but it doxxes like all of my personal information"

huffylemon

johnturturro

#i liked how in true blood vampire bill went to the church to be like LOL MYTH #A CROSS IS JUST BASIC GEOMETRY #but it did hurt a bit he was just super strong - that is the vampire i would be because I tell my tattoo artist i'm fine but like am i?

victusinveritas

orcboxer

honestly "oracle that nobody believes" is such a solid trope. imagine trying to convince anybody in 2006 what the next two decades was gonna look like

#if i could talk to old therapists then perhaps i was not a pathetic simp that needs to move on and stop deluding myself because married her?#and did not need to work on feeling pretty i needed to go on t?#a lot of really fun stuff that stunted me in indecision because its easier to think i'm not looking from all angles?