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disney princesses lockscreens

Apparently my director went to see a production of West Side Story a few years ago, and the guy playing Chino forgot his gun before coming out for his final scene. Once it got to the big scene where he is supposed to shoot Tony, he screeched “Poison Boots” and kicked the actor playing Tony until he went down. The girl playing Maria then had to jerk the shoe off of Chino’s foot, and had to do the gunshot scene asking “How many kicks Chino? How many kicks, and one kick left for me”.

tbbackus

There should be a blog dedicated to theatrical urban legends. Like that opening weekend of Dracula where Dracula (still hungover) vomited all over the audience during the first stage direction that everyone has a friend of a friend that worked on the show and was there.

crutchie-morris

or the one where the bridge never came out for Javert’s suicide and so he just pretended to stab himself and then lay there until the lights went out

musicofthestage

best story i heard was when a friend of mine saw a show where juliet forgot to bring the dagger out on stage so she just ripped the squib out of her chest and blood squirted everywhere

agatharights

During a passion play a friend of my brother was supposedly in, one of the roman soldiers who was supposed to stab jesus on the cross and accidentally grabbed the wrong spear- he was supposed to grab one with a fake tip, but instead he grabbed one with an actual metal tip and, well

Jesus screamed “JESUS CHRIST YOU STABBED ME”.

Since that Jesus had to be taken down due to a bad case of stab-itis, the backup Jesus came in, but he weighed significantly less than the original Jesus- which would have been fine, except that at the end the cross was supposed to ascend upwards with Jesus on it, and the weights hadn’t been adjusted.

So Jesus, instead, ROCKETED UP into heaven (or, just, above the stage).

soulpunchftw

This is wild from start to finish

totalspiffage

I was in Peter Pan once and one night at a performance, the adhesive holding our Hook’s mustache on was wearing off. It was near the end with a big fight scene and when he got attacked, he let his mustache fall and went “YOU RIPPED MY MUSTACHE OFF!” in a scandalized tone and it added a new note of hilarity to the whole scene (which was supposed to be funny anyway)

punkbatsarchive

In my seventh grade play, which was a midsummer night’s dream, Thisbe didn’t have a sword so she stabbed herself with a coathanger

redheadeddisneyfreak

My junior year we were doing Romeo and Juliet and after Juliet poisons herself it was supposed to go dark and she’d get off the stage. well the light crew accidentally turned them back on and Juliet who was sitting up slammed back down on the wooden bed with a loud bang. To which my theater teacher says into the com “zombie Juliet” and everyone who heard that had to keep as quiet as possible while our eyes were filling with tears.

sammywhatammy

i attended my county’s performing arts high school majoring in vocal studies, (mostly geared towards musical theater and opera styles) and once a year we got a field trip to new york (we were in jersey, so it’s not exactly far). we would do one touristy thing, an actor’s workshop with friends of our teachers working in various performing industries in nyc, and then see a show.

my first year doing this, our industry contacts were 1 actor, 1 casting director, and 1 producer to get different aspects of the business, and they all gave us amazing advice and told fantastic stories. the actor in question was Zazu on Broadway’s The Lion King for several years, and told the best story by far.

in The Lion King, there are only two pieces of pre-recorded noise in the whole show. one, when Pumbaa does a MASSIVE fart while fighting the hyenas, and the other being Mufasa saying REMEMBERRRRRR as Simba climbs Pride Rock. the actor told us while struggling not to laugh that, during one night’s performance, someone forgot to flip the tape of these pre-recorded noises.

so, at the end of the show, the great climax where Simba finally accepts his place in the Circle of Life, the heavens parted and-

PFFFFFFFFFRRRRRBTFTBTBFTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

everyone froze. and then all ran off stage positively HOWLING with laughter.

the lesson: sometimes there are fuck ups you just can’t recover from.

cinder-ember

During a high school production of Beauty and the Beast, where I was assistant costumer and assistant prop master, our director decided that we needed to spice up Gaston’s introduction. You know: in the movie, when Lefou runs in trying to catch the duck/goose that Gaston has just shot out of the sky?

Originally, the actors were going to stroll on stage with our Lefou hauling in the really neat (and real!) taxidermied deer head that we had found in a local thrift store. Now, two days before opening night, our director wants Lefou to run in from off stage and catch a stuffed duck that Gaston has just shot. This, of course, requires two things to work properly as a scene: a gunshot noise, and a stuffed duck.

The gunshot noise, we had covered. Blue-collar, redneck school? Guns a plenty to record. The stuffed duck? Harder than you might have thought to obtain.

Three hunting stores, two taxidermists, and one Pet Supply Store ™, I’d finally found a semi-realistic pheasant squeaky toy. What follows is an account of the ways this dog toy managed to be the nightmare prop of the six show run.

Opening Night: The stagehand, who was supposed to drop the bird from the ceiling catwalk, missed his cue and didn’t drop the it. Lefou’s actor rolls with it and does an excellent job of looking around foolishly before getting cuffed upside the head by Gaston. The stagehand then drops the bird squarely on Gaston’s head. Cue laughter.

Saturday Matinee: Different stagehand throws the bird instead of dropping it and beans Lefou directly in the face with the prop. Lefou falls over. Cue laughter.

Saturday Night: Bird is missing during curtain call. Director hauls the deer head down from it’s place on the tavern wall and tells Gaston and Lefou to revert to the old blocking i.e. no gunshot, no bird, just walk in with trophy. During Gaston and Lefou’s conversation, gun shot sound goes off and a stagehand throws the bird onto the stage…from the wrong side of the stage. Lefou and Gaston stare at it in awkward silence for a solid thirty seconds before Lefou makes off-script, subtle joke about Gaston’s gun going off late instead of early. Cue adults in the audience laughing.

Sunday Matinee: Director begs the stagehands to get the cue right at least once. Gunshot and bird prop go off without a hitch. Lefou accidentally catches the prop when it falls from the catwalk. He’s so startled that he caught it that Gaston runs right in to him. They drop both the gun and the bird props, and grab the wrong prop in their scramble. Gaston spends the rest of the scene gesturing dramatically with a stuffed pheasant, instead of a gun.

Sunday Night: Director is fed up with bird prop, decides that Lefou should just carry bird prop in after gunshot happens off stage. Lefou accidentally squeezes the prop during the intro conversation, startling both actors into silence with the squeaky toy noise - apparently, neither of them realized it was a dog toy.

Monday Elementary School Show: Lefou walks on stage with the bird. Accidentally drops the prop during conversation with Gaston. Gaston doesn’t notice the dropped prop and steps on it. Cue depressingly sad squeaky toy noise. Cue ten years olds laughing.

fat-hippie

I was in Twelfth Night during high school and we were lucky enough to have identical twin girls playing Viola and Sebastian. Due to the blocking in the first half of the play, their characters didn’t appear on stage together but rather almost consecutively one after the other for a majority of the first act.

It was awesome because when people saw the play and didn’t know the girls were identical twins, it literally looked like it was one actor doing multiple, uber fast costume changes.

One of our first performances was for our peers and it was a big school so lots of people didn’t know the twins. This - for some reason - was also the performance they chose to record.

Listening to the confusion of the audience during the playback was fantastic and completely topped by the moment Viola walked off stage left just as Sebastian walked on stage right and someone right beside the camera goes “OH WHAT THE FUCK” so loudly it drowned out everything else.

The best thing? That was the copy of the play that was made available for purchase by family and parents. Haha.

whereismyvillage

Oh my god. I went to one of the Spiderman shows where he flew out above the audience and then got stuck and had to awkwardly hang there for about 10 minutes, but these stories are brilliant.

andthereisnotragedyinthat

okay so, my senior year of high school and I’m part of the stage crew for Peter Pan. There’s a scene where Hook and Smee are searching for Peter and the Lost Boys. Now the theater department at my high school isn’t very well funded (in the southern USA, football is king), so the sets we managed to make were pretty kickass for the money we had. We had a structure painted like a big tree stump for the entrance to the Lost Boys’ hideout. You could climb to the top of it, but also go inside it through a trap door that we kept locked up during most of the play.

It’s like our third show and everything has been going surprisingly well. Hook and Smee climb to the top of the “tree trunk”, supposedly looking for Peter and not knowing they’re standing above his hiding spot the whole time.

Turns out someone didn’t close the trapdoor properly, because the second Hook steps on it, he plunges through the thing. He’s able to catch himself, but he’s got his ass and one leg dangling through this hole where it’s like a ten foot drop to the ground. All of us stage crew are literally two feet away from him offstage, just gaping at him because???? Y'all this fall looked BAD. Looked like my dude did the splits in mid air. The whiplash caused his fucking wig to come off. The audience is dead silent, all of us backstage are dead silent, the director is like already looking up how to treat a broken groin.

The kid who was playing Hook was like a fuckin sophomore and he KILLED it. He gave himself a second to catch his breath, never broke character, just looked up at his castmate and growled “Smee, you fool, help me up!”. He ended up playing off the wig thing as an embarrassing comedic bit for Hook, and the play went on. He was completely fine. It was the best thing I’d ever seen.

squidspawn

There was an infamous performance of the opera Don Giovanni where in the last act Giovanni was suppose to be dragged into hell via trapdoor but the overweight actor got stuck, leading someone from the audience to shout: “Hey everyone, Hell’s full!!”

sarahviehmann

I’m pretty sure I’ve reblogged this before but the Lefou story has me in tears every time.

dwlostcompanion

As someone who did Tech stuff in High school for 4 years, Lefou!

five-very-happy-years

I was a costumer on a stage version of Titanic, and in the scene where the women and children are getting in the lifeboats, one of the men (who was supposed to be saying goodbye to his wife he knows he will never see again because his is about to die), realized his fake mustache was falling off and instead of playing it cool… he rips it off his face, and hands it to his wife with the line “Something to remember me by”…it was the funniest thing that I have ever seen in my 8 years in theatre, the entire cast lost their shit laughing at the most dramatic moment possible

friendly-neighborhood-wizard

during a production of the lion king jr. we had this huge set piece with stairs that essentially served as pride rock. during the circle of life, rafiki would stand on the rock and the ensemble would descend from the audience in our respective animal costumes. about halfway during the song, the lions would enter with baby simba, climb the rock, and hand baby simba over to rafiki for the moment where he is lifted into the air. well, our rafiki had these extremely long, slippery bamboo “fingers” that were really hard to control, and baby simba was just a stuffed animal.

so.

imagine you are a tiny child, coming to see a play production of the lion king.

you watch as baby simba taken into rafiki’s hands, ready to be announced as the main character, who we spend the next hour talking about, lifted in the air in triumph as the music swells…

and then promptly dropped from the top of pride rock

and considering simba’s life is the entire plot of the lion king, we had to carry on with the show in the knowledge that it probably should’ve ended right there

girlsonffilm

During my sisters performance of Oliver, 3 different kids forgot their bowls and just pretended to eat.

In my performance of Romeo and Juliet (I was stage manager) Romeo forgot to have the dagger on him so juliet just punched herself in the stomach really hard.

newsieofnj

When I did West Side, Chino had a gun that was supposed to be as realistic as possible without any actual bullets or anything of the sort, and there was a problem with it so it didn’t fire after he came out onstage and Tony just kinda looked at him awkwardly and dramatically died in Maria’s arms and meanwhile chink is still like ????

little-one-smiles

My school did Shrek the Musical this year and the character who played Lord Farquaad stood on his knees the whole time with these stuffed legs and fake shoes in front to make him look ridiculously short. Well during his second biggest scene the seam of. The leg ripped from the shoe so he just has this free hanging leg the whole time. At one point he is yelling at somebody so he just straight up grabs the leg and jabs it at who he is yelling at then goes on to do the rest of the scene as if nothing is wrong. The audience was laughing the whole time. Enter Lord Farquaad a couple scenes later who galliently gets off his ‘horse’ and just says “just back from ankle surgery, weeeee!” The whole audience was dying and he couldn’t have played it off any better than he did.

mod2amaryllis

ok ok ok ok ok ok can I just have a quick lil moment of your time?

This shit.

So Hunchback is far and away my favorite movie from Disney’s Renaissance, and it always makes me so happy that yes, people seem to appreciate it, people seem to love it, but I’mma go into exactly WHY it’s my favorite, and WHY I think it’s so crucial, and WHY I think it should be required viewing for young boys specifically.

We all know that a huge bulk of the media we’ve grown up with consistently has that one frustrating message: Being the hero means you’ll get the girl. Many boys let this mentality bleed into reality. We have “nice guys,” who feel that their niceness entitles them to romance, when obviously that discredits a female’s personal choice. We all get this, we all know this, and a lot of us get that it’s a toxic message.

So check out our hero.

He’s an incredibly good person who isn’t conventionally attractive.

Check out our lady.

Super good person, conventionally attractive.

The movie so deliberately builds up Quasi’s hopes. There’s a whole fucking song about it.

But Esmeralda, who is her own person with her own motivations and preferences, chooses another man, who is also good and also attractive.

A lot of people criticize this aspect of the movie, the fact that Quasi doesn’t get the girl BECAUSE of his appearance. But my argument? This is the best damn message a movie could ever send.

Because when things get dicey, when Esmeralda’s life in in danger, when Quasi would be putting his own life on the line, he knows that romance is no longer within the realm of possibility. He knows he won’t be “getting the girl.” He knows this, and he allows himself a moment of bitterness, he risks falling prey to the “nice guy” trope, and he almost succumbs.

“She already has her knight in shining armor, and it’s not me.”

BUT THEN HE DOES THE RIGHT THING.

He has NO ulterior motive for saving her life. NO ulterior motive for opposing the man who raised him. And he doesn’t know that he’ll get any reward, he knows he could straight up get killed for his actions, and yet he still acts.

And there’s no bitterness. There’s still so, so much love between him and Esmeralda, pure awesome platonic love, and love between him and Phoebus, and just fucking love all around, it’s amazing.

I’ve heard so many people express distaste at Quasi not ending up with Esmerelda. Like he was cheated out of some kind of reward. But have they watched the ending?

Does that look like a man cheated of his reward? Does he look like he “lost” to Phoebus? No dude, that’s a man who has everything he ever wanted, and that’s also a man who didn’t “get the girl.”

If that’s not an essential message for young boys to hear, I don’t know what is.

deeafrotailmisstress

musicalhell

The writers described HoND as a “Rolling Stones” ending: Quasimodo doesn’t get what he wants (Esmeralda’s love) but he gets what he needs (freedom from his abusive guardian and acceptance by the city in general). And yes, that totally counts as a win for him.

sirslytherinscastle

The best Disney movie ever, right up there with Atlantis and Big Hero 6

cupcakesandrainbowsxoxo-deactiv

Stitch and Angel lockscreens requested by anon 💙💖

sciencebelongstoallofus

Maki Naro @ The Nib

itsallavengers

Peter Parker would literally be the WORST on stakeout missions, he lasted 37 minutes trapped in that storage facility in homecoming and for every moment of it he was active in some way. I think if he sat still and ‘watched an entrance’ for more than three seconds he’d just immediately start vibrating at a frequency that would tear his body apart.

psychbaby-blog

catchymemes

“My mom painted this and said no one would like it. It’s her 2nd painting.”

“I painted somebody’s mom”

“Took a while and not perfect, but i painted the guy who painted the other guy’s mom”

“I painted the girl who painted the guy who painted the other guy’s mom who painted an egret”

“I painted the guy who painted the girl who painted the guy who painted the mom who painted a bird”

“When it sinks in that I stayed up most of the night to paint a meme for internet points…”

yetimati

…And nobody thought to post other “branchs” of this chain? Yes, it’s ‘branchS’, plural, because apparently we also have these:

Bit wonky, but I painted the woman who painted the guy who painted the lady who painted the swan.

Bit shitty, but I painted the woman who painted the woman who painted the guy who painted the lady who painted the swan

I painted u/Shitty_WaterColour who painted the woman who painted the woman who painted the guy who painted the lady who painted the swan

I painted u/color_on_a_page who painted u/Shitty_WaterColour who painted the woman who painted the woman who painted the guy who painted someone’s mom who painted a swan

Oh well, here’s yet another layer

Another branch, starting from the girl with the white background:

Took an hour or so but I painted the girl who painted the guy who painted the other guys mom

I didn’t like how reddit treated the iPad guy so I painted the guy that painted the girl that who painted the guy who painted the other guys mom on my iPad.

Continue from OP’s branch:

I haven’t painted in two years and I’m glad for the inspiration!!

A painting of the guy who hasn’t painted in years painting the guy who painted the girl who painted the guy who painted the girl who painted the other girl who painted the guy who painted the other guys mom

Same ‘level’ as the one above:

Usually lurking but not today…plaid was a great challenge!

Continue! With a cat!

We painted the guy that painted the other guy who hadn’t painted in 2 years who painted the other guy who painted the girl that painted the guy who painted the girl that painted the guy that painted some guy’s mother who painted a swan whilst making them all an NPC in the process

Honorary mentioned:

Cheep cheep cheep cheep cheep!!!

And finally, The Great Family Tree (some branch is not in the picture, pls click the link below for the full list:

This seems necessary…

https://nubleh.github.io/i_painted/

urpe1fect4m3

had no idea where this was going but i’m glad I stuck around

xbabydollx

I came home to find that Daddy had put up a hammock for my stuffies in our bedroom… he’s the best 💖✨

sirslytherinscastle

I’m going to need to do this for my Babygirl. I can’t wait until she joins me on the truck. I hate being a long distance daddy. I’m no good at it.

babygirl-miles-deactivated20220

How to deal with Little Meltdowns

This is how my daddy calms me down after I have a meltdown (I’m not ALWAYS perfect…)

If your little is not already laying on a comfy surface try to get them that way.

Your little will most likely face away from you. Big spoon them and drape an arm around

If your little tries to tell you to go away, don’t unless they insist. then move your arm but don’t roll away.

At this point, once daddies arm is moved, I usually freak out that he moved.

This, is how he gets me to turn over.

Cuddle your little into your arms and talk to them calmly.Tell them you love them. That it’s okay. Comfort them. Kiss their head. Brush their hair with your hands.

Once your little has calmed a bit, reach for the nearest stuffie

Say “OH LOOK! (stuffie name) IS HUGGING YOU

If the little laughs, smother them with kisses, yours and the stuffies

if they keep crying repeat step 6 until you get to 9

Once your little is stable enough to talk, make sure whatever issue there was is resolved.

Make sure to cuddle, give juice, paci, blankets. Make them feel safe again

Alright guys! This might not work for every Caregiver and Little but here is a general outline of one of daddies favorite ways to calm me down. Of course, it’s different depending on the situation and this is a very general version but I thought I would share this with you guys!!!!

thorthedorkworld

I’m screaming why does Mamma Mia fit every fight scene so perfectly ajkaslajjddhhajadkjfh

thegoombs

Because it IS a fight song.

coinstar4cheese

@renegadebusiness

hamletthedane

Pro tip: if an evangelical stranger approaches you asking to pray for you, there’s inevitably something about you that they see and want to change. [Ex: I attend a very conservative, very religious uni and am clearly tomboyish/lesbiany, and thus am constantly attracting evangelical strangers] If you can’t shake them (usually very difficult), then turn the tactic upon them by asking if they mind you leading the prayer bc “I have a few things on my mind.”

Then talk about whatever it is that’s making them uncomfortable. I ask god to protect all the lgbt+ kids that are lost, isolated or homeless. I mention my non-Christian brothers, sisters, and siblings that have to fight for recognition and respect in a monoreligious nation. I pray for the protection of immigrants and refugees, reminding my evangelical friends that their savoir was once one of that number. You can pray for pregnant mothers to find the resources and abortive care that they need, if they need it, if you’re feeling particularly brave.

This achieves two things: 1) there is no response to this, esp if you wrap it up with “amen, thank you guys so much for doing that with me. I hope y'all have a blessed day” and leave them no room to continue the prayer. But more importantly 2) that group will NEVER bother you again and you will show them, using their own method against them, that their prayer isn’t an act of faith, but of power.

Just thought I’d share bc I know that I used to be accosted by evangelical strangers once a week on my uni campus and never had a good response or ‘out’. This is by far the most effective method of shutting that sort of behavior down real quick.

darkfrog24

Jesus could be a passive-aggressive son of a G and this is right out of his playbook.

nonibear11

Omg lol.

alexisbloodwood

BWAHAHAHA

nostrem

THEY SAID DONT LAUGH

babybunsworld-blog

I can’t help it 😂😂

When you’re super super bored at a truck stop bc there is no service

Happy New Year from Cali from Franklin and I

Sorry it’s been so long since a Franklin update. It’s hard to sneak around my trainer to take pictures of him. We drove from Georgia to Ohio to NJ! Franklin wasn’t happy to be back in the cold, but this time there was so much more exciting stuff to look at! Plus I treated him to Cinnabon for being good!

#cute #cglre #adorable #age regression #sfw age regression #sfw daddy #sfw caregiver #sfw only #sfw caregiver blog #sfw cg #sfw agereg #dxlg #sfw dxlg #rhino #franklin

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