Gobbbbb @sleepy-globlin - Tumblr Blog

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Concept: lesbian women in fairytales that go around trading with witches that ask for their first born children as payment

moringottos-deactivated20210117

mysharona1987

fullpraxisnow

Math proves that capitalism sucks and that capitalists are greedy.

brosefvondudehomie-deactivated2

So he gave millions and you gave $40 and feel like you’re doing more?

pebbleofgod

laurasterisk

As presented, brought to you by Jesus, and THE FRIGGING BIBLE

sleepy-globlin

What’s mOrE. The rich man is a leader of the synagogue, and at the time it was his job to care for widows and their children, for some of the poorest of the poor. He did not. Those two pennies are the woman’s everything - she should not have to give up everything to please the synagogue (that’s what they were collecting for), and she should not have had only two pennies to give.

This is not just the simple message that someone who has nothing gives more than someone who has everything - it is that people who have nothing should not have to give if the people who have everything giving enough. It is that those with nothing should not give everything. It is that it is not their responsibility. It is that the spirit of human kindness, while an important virtue for individuals (especially for those in power), should not be used to absolve those with money and power of their responsibility to the poor.

Basically, Jesus rocks.

And if anyone tries to argue that faith isn’t political, or that I should keep socialism or capitalism or whatever out of scripture - I would like to kindly invite you to shut up. If we ought to live as Jesus taught us, then we ought to speak and vote and act as Jesus taught us. This is some of what he taught us.

guilty-as-battery-charged-deact

The Addams Family renting out rooms in their huge mansion cheaply to broke college students.

The students digging it because the craziness and the bugs are pretty much the same as any other dorm house. Also, Morticia and Gomez treat them all like visiting cousins, not like tenants to abuse and exploit.

guilty-as-battery-charged-deact

One of the tenants is a creative writing major and Gomez and Morticia house them up in the tower because of the quiet and the inspiring view

They’re supposed to be working on a typical coming-of-age story but after living with the Addams for just a week the project is becoming a horror-Gothic-romance

They go to their room after classes one day and find Thing correcting the grammar errors in the manuscript with a red pen

specialstarfish

and yeah, the students pay roughly market value for their rooms, but that doesn’t stop gomez from shouting “capital idea!” and handing them wads of cash when they tell him about their weekend plans or what they’re researching, so they basically end up living there for free

gholateg

In the same vein, half the them have to turn into exceptional fencers, because Gomez just doesn’t give a shit, and if he sees you in the library, its fucking Sword Fighting Time.

Fester and Pugsley find out one of the college students is trying to get into chemistry and woo boy, there has never been a faster study of how to counter various acidic chemical reactions due to “water” balloons in campus history.

Morticia and Grammy are keeping the horticulturalists on their toes with their Black Tulip/Rose hybrids, which can flick their barbs a foot away from their stem system. But it’s fine, one of the kids has managed to breed Aloe with the anti venom.

Lurch makes sandwiches for everyone who’s too much of a coward for Grammy’s cooking. Any music major will find him looming over them, utterly stone faced as they practise until they finish, when he’ll smile, and slowly applaud.

And the spookiest thing of all

Wednesday and Thing will find your thesis. They will critique it in every way imaginable.

There is no escape.

aardvarkingmad

I especially love the idea of Gomez spotting a student in the library, throwing a sword at a startled student, shouting, “En garde!” and lunging at him/her with a sword of his own.

Student (later in life), when asked how she jumps from quietly doing research to handling a sudden influx of ER cases so quickly and easily, says, “When you have to snap out of deep concentration on biochem to fight for your life then get back to biochem without losing your train of thought…you learn or you die.”

soap-stains

This has made me laugh so hard-

manicbones

you know what’s more freeing than killing yourself? running away to a small town and getting a job as a waitress. buying a cheap car and sticking a bed in the back and driving southwest. adopting a cat. learning a new instrument. moving apartments. visiting a friend in another city. chopping all your hair off.

you can kill your current life without dying. you can kill this version of you and make a new one.

maybe I’m just a bipolar sucker for rebirth but sometimes that thought is all that keeps me alive

pikafem

pulling a wholesome gone girl > actually killing yourself

kurtwagnermorelikekurtwagnerd

it's 2022. donald trump has died in disgrace days after being impeached and jailed. my chemical romance's new album is coming out the same day as the new spiderverse movie. the lizzo and janelle monaé collab song is blowing up the radio. lil nas x has a verse in it. you and your partner have time and energy for dates after work after jeff bezos' assets have been seized and distributed to the public in the wake of his arrest for keeping employees in unsafe working conditions.

baconis42

oh what a life

dee-the-red-witch

Like to charge, reblog to cast.

glumshoe

Another thing I love in fiction is when dialogue immediately echoes the same phrasing used in the narration. It can be startling and funny.

Ex.:

As they made their way back to the car, Farad felt the prickle of eyes upon him. He looked around and spotted the culprits—perched on the roof of a van, a gaggle of dour-faced teenagers was watching them judgmentally.

“Don’t look now,” he whispered to his companion, “But a gaggle of dour-faced teenagers is watching us judgementally.”

mikkeneko

This can be used as a great character establishing trick too, eg.

What the fuck, she thought, and then because she was never the sort of person to sit on her feelings, said aloud “What the fuck?”

kyraneko

It works great the other direction, too.

“Fuck yourself dead, you half-blazed, fully-degenerate asshole!”

The half-blazed, fully-degenerate asshole in question declined to do so, and instead threw herself bodily at the other woman with the full intention to claw her to shreds.

mariesaandothercatastrophies

Just say neil gaimon and terry pratchett are your faves and move on

glumshoe

They’re not. They’re also not the only authors to employ narrative humor.

mattoidal

“Get a rat and put it in a cage and give it two water bottles. One is just water, and one is water laced with either heroin or cocaine. If you do that, the rat will almost always prefer the drugged water and almost always kill itself very quickly, right, within a couple of weeks. So there you go. It’s our theory of addiction. Bruce comes along in the ‘70s and said, “Well, hang on a minute. We’re putting the rat in an empty cage. It’s got nothing to do. Let’s try this a little bit differently.” So Bruce built Rat Park, and Rat Park is like heaven for rats. Everything your rat about town could want, it’s got in Rat Park. It’s got lovely food. It’s got sex. It’s got loads of other rats to be friends with. It’s got loads of colored balls. Everything your rat could want. And they’ve got both the water bottles. They’ve got the drugged water and the normal water. But here’s the fascinating thing. In Rat Park, they don’t like the drugged water. They hardly use any of it. None of them ever overdose. None of them ever use in a way that looks like compulsion or addiction. There’s a really interesting human example I’ll tell you about in a minute, but what Bruce says is that shows that both the right-wing and left-wing theories of addiction are wrong. So the right-wing theory is it’s a moral failing, you’re a hedonist, you party too hard. The left-wing theory is it takes you over, your brain is hijacked. Bruce says it’s not your morality, it’s not your brain; it’s your cage. Addiction is largely an adaptation to your environment. […] We’ve created a society where significant numbers of our fellow citizens cannot bear to be present in their lives without being drugged, right? We’ve created a hyperconsumerist, hyperindividualist, isolated world that is, for a lot of people, much more like that first cage than it is like the bonded, connected cages that we need. The opposite of addiction is not sobriety. The opposite of addiction is connection. And our whole society, the engine of our society, is geared towards making us connect with things. If you are not a good consumer capitalist citizen, if you’re spending your time bonding with the people around you and not buying stuff—in fact, we are trained from a very young age to focus our hopes and our dreams and our ambitions on things we can buy and consume. And drug addiction is really a subset of that.”

— Johann Hari, Does Capitalism Drive Drug Addiction?

swolerbear

This is so fucking important, I cannot cannot cannot stress enough how important this is.

tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva

I wish I lived in Rat Park instead of capitalism

millennial-review-deactivated20

excalibelle

can we add that employers shouldn't be allowed to require them from employees they don't offer health insurance to?

autterthisworld

I wish there was a show like My Cat from Hell but with autistic people

Autism Parent™: My kind won’t stop throwing tantrums

Autistic Expert: Well A) those are meltdowns NOT tantrums B) they have no control over this and C) stop touching them without their consent and forcing them into overwhelming situations

Autism Parent ™: I just want my kid to say “I love you”

Autistic Expert: They have been telling you they love you by infodumping to you and spending time in the same room as you. You just refuse to listen.

Autism Parent ™: They behave so weird. I want them to stop.

Autistic Expert: Have you ever talked to an autistic adult to learn about what autistic body language looks like? Well stop expecting them to act neurotypical, they are not. Their behavior makes actually absolutely sense for an autistic person.

Feel free to add more examples :)

firespirited

Parent: My kid screams after dinner every evening

Expert: Your dishwasher is really loud and makes the floor vibrate, have you tried running the dishwasher later?

Parent: My kid won’t eat

Expert: Now it could be for the forced eye contact and physical proximity of the family dinner table, it could also be a matter of texture, colour or certain tastes like bitter or sour, let’s try different things.

Parent: My kid yells when I want them to do homework straight away when we get back from school

Expert: The social part of school is draining for your child, have a nap/quiet-time then do homework

Parent: my child hates their grandfather and goes silent when we’re at their house.

Expert: Grandfather demands hugs, calls child a wierdo when they share their interests, calls them a wuss for having food preferences and keeps the tv on at high volume even during conversations, what did you expect?

Parent: My child is deliberately embarrasing me in front of my friends

Expert: It’s not about you. Children don’t set out to deliberatly embarrass their parents, that’s paranoid nonsense. Also stop dragging your child to events you know will be unpleasant to them.

Parents: I’m devastated, my child is wierd and everyone can tell and people look at me like i’m wierd and they’re not going to give me grandchildren or a wedding or become a lawyer like me and my father before me or a sports star and doesn’t like many of my interests…

Expert: You self absorbed asshole. Your child is not a mini-me, not there to fulfill your lost dreams, or fill in for adult friendships. If you can’t change and learn to appreciate what’s interesting about your kid and only see negatives and milestones that even a neurotypical child might not achieve anyway, I’m calling child services.

Parent: My kid is terrible at school, they won’t sit still in class and chatter all the time and ask the teacher lots of questions and prefer playing cards to tag

Expert: What are their grades like?

Parent: Very good,*sigh* I guess. Teachers have been quite enthusiastic but…

Expert: That’s your child’s way of focusing and socializing. You have a smart child and can’t even say so because you’re focusing on the differences again.

Parent: My child never tells me if they’re happy or sad.

Expert: Look closer, what gestures mean I’m in pain? what gestures mean i’m happy? Kid has been humming snippets of songs, tapping fingers and sat close to you but beside the sofa on the floor during this conversation. Happy, paying attention and wanting to be close to you. Right kid? You doing ok there?

Kid: *current kid slang for yeah dude totally rad but without tone* goes back to humming

shoresoftheshadowlands

so can we have the show already please? We really for serious need this

cleopatronising

i think the only thing wrong with some of us is that we’re being robbed of traditional jobs like woodworking artisans and witch doctors and being forced to like… write a cv and breathe stale air conditioner air when we should be barefoot hauling oranges from an orchard…

My coursework came out pretty

✨tumblr✨

So here it is. :))

#gardencore #flowers #goblincore #aestehtic #naturecore #floral #photography #hands #green #floaty #pretty #grandmacore #shiny #goblin

thehauntedcottage

Soft goblincore things- because we are not always little beings of chaos and shrieks, stealing and thievery

Muddy shoes, because although you could walk around muddy paths you chose to stomp on ahead and enjoy it

Picking lavender and/or lichen and sticking it in a random part of your hair so you can touch it every so often and smile

Wearing clothing with textures, you gonna wear velvet with a cronchy top? Great, experience your clothes

Taking showers in the dark and imagining you’re under a waterfall

Finding small things like bark or rocks and giving them to others meaningfully

Stopping every time you see a mushroom to boop it hello on the head

Making yourself a pile of blankets and stuffed animals and hiding deep in it

Burying things

Giving humans you care about soft scratches like cats, because mammals you know? They want the good pets

Cleaning your horde, slowly and with care

Taking yourself out for walks, go to your local stream, forest or mountain and let yourself become one with it

loughnesstwo-deactivated2021101

“Trick or Yeet!” I shout to the children when I open the door. “Yeet?” one says confusidly. I shrug. “Yeet it is.” I throw the child.

marauders4evr

Abled Person: Hey man, can you hold this wad of $2,000 and this one penny for me while I open my wallet?

Disabled Person: YOU COMPLETE AND UTTER FOOL!

The United States Government:

(Watch how many people don’t get this.)

marauders4evr

#raises hand #i dont understand #please explain?

In order for disabled people to receive any sort of financial assistant for their housing, food, bills, medical supplies, etc., they cannot ever have more than $2,000 of resources to their name. Ever.

It doesn’t matter what it’s for.

You’re saving up for a new wheelchair?

For college?

To put a downpayment on a house?

Hell man, you just happen to budget for once in your life so that you can have some extra money in case something bad happens?

Your benefits immediately get cut off if you’re a cent over $2,000.

And, even worse, you usually end up having to pay back every dollar the government gave you that month.

So say you get $400. If they find out you’re twenty dollars over the resource limit, you have to give them all $400 back and you undergo an investigation of your funds to see if you will continue getting money.

“What if I spend the money that day?”

Doesn’t matter. In fact, from what I can tell, people who do this are actually put under investigation for fraud.

And yes, this system literally kills people.

locuas642

Remember when “Guardians of the Galaxy” came out? one of Rocket Racoon’s creators, Bill Mantlo, suffered an accident in 1992 and has irreparable brain damage.

before the movie came out, Marvel gave him an exclusive preview screening. SOme people were upset because they felt if Marvel was really wanted to thank mantlo, they should have donated money to Mantlo’s family.

Bill Mantlo’s brother had to come out and explain: If Marvel gave them monetary aid, Bill Mantlo would lose his financial assistance.

rootbeergoddess

That’s so utterly depressing.

sushinfood

disgusting

beeskeepony

I have friends on welfare who won’t pick up a penny in the street because they’d risk the welfare they struggled to get for 10 years.

raenboow

oh look another fucked up thing in this world. let’s just add it to the list. number 63858b

luvtonique

My brother has been on California State SSI for autism for the last 10 years, and he absolutely has to (no joke, HAS TO) spend all 720 bucks of his SSI every month, because if he puts it in the bank he risks losing his SSI altogether.

Sometimes, at the end of the month, he has no idea what to do with his money because the whole month went by and he still has 400-ish bucks in his account, and he fucking panics because he doesn’t want to get anywhere near 2,000.

And here’s the funnest part of the story!

One day he did a huge commission on Second Life and wound up earning 1500 bucks off of it, and he told the guy to donate it 500 bucks at a time over 3 months. The guy didn’t want to, and just donated all 1500, which put my brother at 2,036 bucks.

The state IMMEDIATELY (I’m talking less than an hour) called him up to tell him over the phone that they were canceling his SSI, because they noticed he had gone over the 2,000 buck threshold. He had to tell them that someone had made a charitable donation to him and that this was not a common occurrence in any way shape or form, and upon not believing him, my mother had to call to talk to them as his legal caretaker and say basically the same thing until they called off the cancellation of his SSI money.

He also had to cancel his renter’s assistance because it put him to 1,062 a month, so if he went 30 days without spending any money they’d cancel his SSI altogether. Like, none of us in the family have any fucking clue why that regulation is in place and it’s the stupidest shit in human history.

Please, legal side of Tumblr, tell me what positive reasoning this law has?

sodomymcscurvylegs

Happy 4th of July everyone! This is what the “nation of opportunity” looks like.

xfirecorex

There’s something called an ABLE account that can help. If you are on SSI and were diagnosed as disabled before the age of 26 you can apply for an ABLE account that will allow you to save up to $99,000. More people need to know about this!