[angelicdewdrop]

[soundcarvings]

I feel so emotionally muted

[alreadydownstream]

the most exciting movement in nature is not progress, advance, but expansion and contraction, the opening and shutting of the eye, the hand, the heart, the mind. we throw our arms wide with a gesture of religion to the universe; we close them around a person. we explore and adventure for a while and then we draw in to consolidate our gains. the breathless swing is between subject matter and form.

- robert frost

quoted this yesterday to lz after she said she wants to live her smallness, to not be important, to not matter. i think life is the swing back and forth. seeing how small your life is on the scale of worlds and how big your life is on the scale of love. juxtaposition of many scales and movements between them

[slipdresses]

thinking about the kind of woman i want to be (as usual) and i think these words are a good summary:

sincere, receptive, gentle, honest, kind, open, curious, hopeful

[slipdresses]

**knowledgeable, talented, compelling

[slipdresses]

jotting down some recent(ish) moments of joy:

-j slicing mangoes and bringing them to me without me asking/us eating them together while i took a bubble bath

-being silly in the group chat/feeling really proud of my friends for where they’ve gotten in life and that we’ve all come up together

-redoing my resume (for like the 3rd? 4th? time) and feeling proud of my accomplishments and how much better my resume looks than just a few months ago

-j coming home with a nintendo switch and saying he got it for *us* to play together (something abt the way he said us made my heart so warm)

-My (very sassy, very tsundere) cat making biscuits on me after i came back from new york

-going back and forth w/ tori during succession sundays lmaooooo

-standing on the rooftop terrace of the MET, watching the sun set over manhattan

[slipdresses]

i think my husband really likes seeing me educate myself lol

his face always lights up when i’m telling him about a new cert or degree or niche skill i’m developing. it’s nice to be with someone who doesn’t just tolerate my interests, but loves & admires how multifaceted i am

[millthompson]

[garmentpurist-deactivated202603]

Although I’m often nostalgic, I know I can only move forward.

[aliceinwondercloset]

[garmentpurist-deactivated202603]

Some of the things I made this year

[nicholaschmidt]

[mmaisonnnn]

[alexhidalgu]

[dyingenigma]

Girl 6 (1996) directed by. Spike Lee

[moon-cherie]

[soracities]

“And no one is me. No one is you. This is solitude.”

— Clarice Lispector, Água Viva

[slipdresses]

suddenly thought about the columbia university job offer i got off pure vibes/charisma, that i turned down because new york was NOT for me

i definitely think i made the right decision. i’m just amazed by how rooted my sense of self is, even when my path looks hazy…