i think a lot of neurotypicals misunderstand what “routine” means in the context of autistic ppl needing routine. they seem very fixated on the idea that routine means doing the same thing at the same time every day (eg always eating at 12, always showering at 7, idk, stuff like that) and they don’t seem to get that while yes, those are a kind of routine that some autistic ppl need/like, it’s not the only thing.
like for me, for example, it is way more important that the songs i listen to play in the right order and that the right kind of audio is on in the background when i do different tasks than it is that i do said tasks at a specific time of day. the routines that are important to me are about how i do things, not when. but nt ppl don’t understand this.
why is this important? bc i have had So. Many. neurotypicals tell me that the reason i’m depressed/anxious/not feeling well is that i don’t have enough of those when routines in my life. that obviously if i made sure to always shower at the exact same time of day i wouldn’t be depressed. that obviously if i made sure to always get up at exactly the same time, no wiggle room of even a minute, then i wouldn’t be anxious. “because you’re autistic!” they say, “and routines are important for you! you’ve even said so yourself!”
and then they proceed to not take the actual reasons why i’m feeling unwell seriously, because obviously if an autistic person isn’t living minute by minute according to a schedule that dictates their every move then that has to be the cause of all their problems.
reblogging this not for the NTs who misunderstand, but for other autistics reading this and going “wait, what i am doing is… a routine?”
