eli:)

don’t ask

[sobbing-eternally]

*a winter’s ball*

burr, interested in the ladies: hey

hamilton, interested in the ladies: hey

laurens, just wanting to be included: hey

[sobbing-eternally]

loki: crouches down beside tony*

loki: so this is how you see the world

[sobbing-eternally]

bucky:

science:

[taliasburns]

INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY ↳ MCU WOMEN

[sobbing-eternally]

tony: hey loki

loki, in his gucci mask: new mask, who dis

tony:

tony: i’m literally right in front of you

[sobbing-eternally]

tony: steve

tony: steve

tony: steve

tony: steve

steve: wh at do you wa nt from me

tony:

tony: hi

[salty-ironstrange-shipper]

Tony: I’m alive, but only out of spite.

[salty-ironstrange-shipper]

Stephen: Okay, let’s do it.

Tony: Stephen, I’m not just some faucet you can turn on and off. You gotta romance me.

Stephen: *undoes the top button of his shirt*

Tony: Faucet’s on, let’s go.

[lazy-cat-corner]

Loki: Anyone who dares to ring my doorbell will die! No questions! No time to defend yourself!

Girl Scouts: Hello sir, would you like-

Loki:[reaching into his wallet] All of it.

[worstloki]

Loki: I’m not going to kill people who offer me cookies!

Thor, stabbed: oh? is that the only reason your kill-rule doesn't apply to them?

Loki: ...they also have decent brownies

[lazy-cat-corner]

The brownies aren’t even part of their fundraisers. They just make brownies to thank Loki for funding their troop and giving the kids a chance to go on field trips every year and buy new supplies/equipment.

Of course Loki doesn’t care. But the boy scouts down the street have been getting overconfident and think they can suck up to him and win his favor with their popcorn and he’ll be damned if he sees the little brats gloating to the girl scouts they’re better than them because “they can do boy stuff”.

[worstloki]

‘Girl Scouts vs Boy Scouts where Loki rigs every attempt of sabotage from the boys to rebound in their faces because he’s getting paid in brownies’ is something I didn't know I wanted but now need

[hashtag-anthems]

This just makes it sound like Loki is now the patron deity of the Girl Scouts, which I 100% support and require more content of.

[lazy-cat-corner]

Which is even more funny because the girl scouts are secular. Meaning based on the troop you’re with, your leader can organize it to be a religious or non religious troop. The thought of a Catholic troop suddenly being revolted by little girls demanding they pray to “our lord and savior, Loki” and replacing “God” with “Mischief” is exactly the kind of chaos Loki is set out to do.

“Our Mischief, who art down the street-

“We’ve talked about this. NO! And stop calling him that.”

[worstloki]

Odin: What chaos is Loki unleashing upon Midgard now

Heimdall, who has a mysterious box of choc-chip-cookies appear on his table mysteriously every week: None. Nothing. He’s been legally following every single rule to the dot. Actually, he’s being better than any model citizen. Keeping a low-profile and everything. He isn't scheming at all.

[imaginationhyperload]

Wait wait imagine instead that the little catholic troop simply bringing Loki to church with them and afterwards Loki would buy even more cookies than usual because “Um, everyone here is being NICE to me!?” And the Girl Scouts would get even more profits because they’re publicly reforming the mischief maker and everyone wants to keep it that way.

Loki sends extra cookies to Heimdall to keep him in his good graces and then sends even more to his mother because she is absolutely IN LOVE with the little scout troop Loki favors.

Loki only gives Thor the flavors Thor doesn’t actually like at first just to spite him and makes Thor chaperone the Girl Scouts on field trips if he wants to find the good flavors. Loki thinks it’s hilarious.

[sobbing-eternally]

thor: *taps mjolnir lightly on the table*

loki, glaring: *makes seidr dance on the table*

tony: what’s that?

nat, smirking: norse code.

[stark-strange-love]

Tony:

✨New year New Me~✨

Stephen: Bitch it’s August

Tony:

✨Time is an illusion~✨

[sobbing-eternally]

*loki’s birthday*

peter, handing loki a badly wrapped box: happy birthday mr loki!

loki, unwrapping the gift to find a toy version of mjolnir: what is this?

peter: i know you were sad about not being able to life mr thor’s hammer so i got you your own :)

loki:

loki, choking up slightly: ᵗʰᵃⁿᵏ ʸᵒᵘ

[sobbing-eternally]

loki: *cracks knuckle*

thor, cringing: loki stop!

loki:

thor:

loki: *vigorous knuckle cracking*

[salty-ironstrange-shipper]

Stephen: In 2020, we start oppressing people who like their hot chocolate with water.

Tony: If you’re lactose intolerant you can stay, but you’re on fucking thin ice.

Harley: I eat the powder straight from the packet.

Peter: Hey, do you know how horrible what you just said was?

[incorrect-spiderson]

Peter: CAN ANYONE IN THIS TOWER SPEAK ENGLISH???

Tony: Peter what are you talking about?

Peter: IM SORRY SIR I CANT UNDERSTAND ENGLISH. IM TRYING TO FIND A TRANSLATOR.

Tony: But... you just... said.. in...

Peter: PLEASE CAN ANYBODY SPEAK ENGLISH?

Shuri: *bursts into the room* I CAN. DO YOU WISH TO SPEAK TO THIS LOWER MAMMAL?

Peter: YES. ASK HIM IF IM ALLOWED TO HAVE DESSERT TONIGHT.

Shuri: *does hand signals*

Tony:

Tony: No

[sobbing-eternally]

peter: i’m sad

tony: why are you sad?

peter: because starfish have such lonely dating lives

tony: ??

peter, sniffling: they’re deaf and blind so they just scuttle along the floor until they bump into another starfish

[sobbing-eternally]

peter: the average human produces enough saliva to fill two swimming pools throughout their entire lifetime

mj: do you want me to kiss you or not?