Fandoms And Weird Shit

I'm bi and ready to die | Leo ♌ | fuck off pornbots I swear to god. | 20

[thethirdromana]

Putting the term "Catholic guilt" on a high shelf where fandom can't reach it until everyone learns how to identify characters who are very very clearly coded as Protestant.

[vampfuneralpyre]

[burgerdotcom]

reblogs were off

[power-handmaiden]

when I was in high school I had a literature teacher who had a policy of unlimited extra credit. All you had to do was read a book by a notable author (his discretion) and have a little chat with him after school to prove that you read it. No limits, no need for variety (one month I decided I really loved Kurt Vonnegut and just read everything of his I could get my hands on).

Yes, I was tearing through books constantly, and talking to this teacher at least weekly. Because even though I always loved reading as a kid, literature was always a very weak subject for me in terms of a teaching-to-standardized-test school setting (I just do awful on "what color were the curtains" type multiple choice questions. Those details don't stick in my memory THEY JUST DON'T). But that didn't matter for this class. I could just read my way out of any bad test score. I have always had fond memories of how I "fudged" my way through that class and "abused' the extra credit policy.

I was thinking about it again today, and only just now realized that he absolutely tricked me into being well-read, while my teenage self thought I was totally getting away with something. THAT MOTHERFUCKER. I hope he's doing well.

[qqchurch]

[free-my-mindd]

[olivetreeyale]

Shower thoughts…🚿🧼

Thihihi✨

[ballard96]

[segamascott]

[innerchildabortionclinic]

[centaurself]

happy 20 years of neil <3

[some-bitch-named-lemon]

Exams are taking over my schedule so if any UK homies want tickets (2) to the bbno$ concert in London 13th May, please feel free to purchase.

I’ll add the links below to the Ticketmaster site where they’re added :)

https://secure.ticketmaster.co.uk/rs/3E00631BE7CE3151/lrxjyhr0x8

[tojisteddy]

It’s not uncommon for pornstar!Simon to get pictures and videos from his fans getting off to his videos.

He’s seen some, deleted most if not all for his followers own protection on his end.

But there’s a video.

One he was just about delete till he accidentally clicked on.

Not a shit camera like his, as if the heavens had opened up, literally and metaphorically, the sun was shinging bright on your glistening wet pussy in 4k. Legs wide open so he can see past your folds to your wet labia minora, you pretty hole clenching and unclenching and drip, drip, dripping down to your asshole. You let out a little moan that makes Simon lean forward on his seat as he watches on the computer screen, eyes astonished, taking in your pretty thighs, the way the grey oversized shirt on you is ruffled up to your hips.

“Fuck- hck- this is crazy!” You’re breathless, leaning back into the pillows on your bed, chest rising and falling while your hardened nipples peak through. And then you bring your soaked hand down, your moan being held in as you bite your lip, holding your leg open with the back of your knee as you flick your own pulsing perl with the other hand.

“Shiiit Si, that’s so- oh my god!” Your voice goes up an octave, mewling, hips bucking in the air, your thumb so calculated as it circles around your budding clit, giving yourself small circles, then large ones, eyes squeeze shut. So delirious as you dream about your favorite pornstar drilling into you, giving your cubby cunt a smack, making you take his every inch of his thick girth till your crying, “More- more Si! Aangh!”

You wither, using the pads of your fingers now, rubbing your poor pussy faster, as if it’s not enough, begging to cum, incoherent whines about how you, “need you Si- I mmmh- need you so bad, uugh- need you!”

And Simon sees your sweet hole tighten, hard, gushing cream as you let out a scream of pleasure, legs shaking. And the video cuts black. The Brit doesn’t even realize he’s started drenching his underwear with the pre fuming from his mushroom tip.

He’s watched you again and again and again, till theres a crappy video of him in that chair in the basement, your video playing on his computer screen in the background, Simon milking himself raw. His cock rock hard but his hand is cum soaked white, twisting both his hands down red hot length, tightening them both, imagining feeling how hard you’d cum around his cock, milking him for filth. the shlick, shlick, shlick sound heard as he lets out a filthy groan.

“Fuck, you dirty girl, heh- you’re a bloody dirty thing, arentcha mama?” The vein of his neck is popping out, held tilted to the side, mouth forming a small ‘o’ whipping the small smirk off his scared and masked face, “Fuuuucks sake lovie!” Simon lets out a deep chuckle, voice cracking as he moans to the video.

And your eyes are wide as you watch his most recent upload after work. You were high as shit when you have the audacity to send that video. Didn’t even think he was the type to look at those kind of things from fans, especially when they weren’t asked for.

But you’re whimpering, wiggling on the bed from the heat starting to pool in your jeans.

Pornstar!Simon is getting off, to you.

His biggest fan.

a/n: I entered a flow state. They’re having a freak off.

Part one

[wallsofparadis]

how i feel opening up tumblr to read x reader ffs at my big age

[str4wb3rry-newsboy]

no, i dont lose hyperfixations. theyre just moved to a different, slightly less used, shelf in my brain.

[pinksplace]

I can’t stop thinking about Simon Riley

Simon Riley who has these big hands, hardened by war and calloused from murder.

Simon Riley with a permanent ache in his shoulder from the kickback of a rifle.

Simon Riley who’s lower back hurts every time he crouches into position.

Simon Riley with knees that click everytime he crouches.

Simon Riley with chafed inner thighs from the rough material of tac pants.

Simon Riley with shoulders tensed up to his ears.

Simon Riley who really, really, really needs a massage.

It’s Gaz who gives him your card, clicks his tongue and tells him “Trust me, bird’s got magic hands.”

Simon Riley who stares at it for two weeks, insisting it’s something for girls, nothing that a man like him would ever need.

Then his back goes out.

Two days of fucking agony, stuck on the shitty base couch because he can barely stand long enough to get back to his quarters.

Two days of wishing he’d just been fucking shot, at least then the med bay would give him the good drugs.

He crawls onto your table with a grunt and the words “Firm pressure.”

Then you touch him.

Like silk, your hands smooth over his muscles, needing every tight spot you can find until the knots come loose under your fingers. 

You take him apart with pressure so firm it’s almost painful, your elbow digging into his tailbone as you work over a particularly stubborn spot.

Simon Riley who’s so fucking vocal the whole time.

He groans, moans, even whimpers into the headrest. Simon who jumps against the table when you start to work on his upper traps.

Simon Riley who cums in his fucking boxers when you make his neck crack.

Like an out of body, third person experience he blows his load just as the tension releases.

It’s unmistakable, his choked noise and the way his entire body goes rigid.

Never mind how he reaches out and grabs your thigh with a grip tight as steel when it happens.

Simon Riley who leaves two hundred dollars in cash and his phone number on the table when he leaves. Along with a little note in his chicken scratch-

“Do you do house calls?”

[blackmarketfruitrollups]

Respectfully, I do not believe you can call yourself a writer if AI is writing it for you.

The increase in fics I've seen where the writer is just like "well it's how I write so scroll if it bothers you"

Babe you're killing the planet

[phantomsuds]

To have and to hold

[yeomanslog]

i have no idea who these people are but the art is beautiful

[yeomanslog]

WAIT A DAMN MINUTE. i just got an insane memory of a wendigoon video with these names i am pretty sure. Is this call of duty fanart????????? is there old man yaoi potential in call of duty?????

[rawme-price]

The concept of king!price marrying reader for the purpose of an heir...but he's infertile.

It's becoming increasingly obvious—after months price bending you over every surface in the beadchambers, study, library, anywhere—that price will not be able to bear a child of his own seed.

He was tempted to blame it on you, but taking a new betrothed only to find the same issue could lead to more problems. Still...unable to create an heir, a shameful thing for a ruler such as price. You see how it eats at your husband each night.

Though you did not know him originally, you've come to appreciate john, even love him at times. As such, you decide to handle the problem yourself.

How? Well, with Sir Mactavish, one of your favourite knights that just so happens to bear stunning blue eyes the same as your king.

You offer your solution up to him late at night.

John undressed into his sleep robes, you in a similar state. Poor johnny makes a horribly pathetic noise when he's summoned to your chambers. If it were anyone else, you doubt price would agree, but mactavish...there's a loyalty in his eyes, a telling that this is no shameful event to devalue price, but just one more thing for him to control.

That night, sir mactavish dishonors his vow of chastity with prices hands on his hips, helping the young lad work you the way you deserve.

The very same month, you miss your bleeding. Still...you need a spare, and mactavish is more than willing to supply.

[some-bitch-named-lemon]

This has me FERAL 💔