El Chupacabra

Zoe ; I don’t even know what this blog is anymore honestly just fuck it

[pwesident]

jesus was a gamer

[unclefather]

how

[pwesident]

died in a t pose

[drearyhours]

respawned

[no-chill-at-all]

[slightmood]

me: *finally gets settled into bed*

my bladder:

[seabass2819]

[somecutething]

He loves getting his haircut!

[sagefigs]

this is one of the best things if not the best I’ve seen in my life 

[paperstorm]

Australian comedian Jim Jefferies points out the ridiculousness of American pro-gun arguments. x x

[redhead4eyes]

Welp

[starscream-moved-blog]

[trustissued]

My heart will always be soft. I will never stop looking for the good and love in everything. You can’t take that away from me.

[gluten-free-pussy]

I know for a fact I’ve told this story on here before but I’ll never get over the time when I was working retail and I was cashing out some lady so I asked “cash, debit or credit how are you paying, ma’am?” And she said “that’s none of your business.” And demanded to speak to my manager about my invasive question

[spark-of-jenius]

Oh, I’ve got one in this vein: a lady called our company wanting us to come steam clean her tile floors, but refused to give her address, instead demanding that we do it at our location. And hung up when I tried to explain that her floors were attached to her house.

Let that sink in for a second. 

[1amgirl]

[dynastylnoire]

why you bake me

[pukicho]

If you were to vacuum up jello through a metal tube, well I think that’d be a neat noise 

[luteyandthemermaid]

i beg to differ 

[pukicho]

Then Beg

[microtear-deactivated20181213]

[automodownremade-deactivated202]

[norabelrose]

I’m going to say something super controversial here: billionaires shouldn’t exist

[ziggyplayedd]

i used to think billionaires were like. slightly richer millionaires but for reference: a million seconds is 12 days, a billion seconds is THIRTY TWO YEARS.

no one can convince me that it’s possible to possess a billion dollars, much less dozens of billions of dollars, and not be a disgusting terrible shitty unethical heartless human being

[parakeet]

by calling yourself valid youre invalidating others. fuck off.

FJKJDLKFJ:LKDSFLKAJDFKLAJDFLKJLKDF

[parakeet]

only one person can be valid at at time it turns out. validity is passed around like the olympic torch

[striikee]

Mom said its my turn on the valid

[fuckyeahgreatplays]

Me, constantly

[daily-rage-comics]

*feels ok for 1 second* amazing. i was faking my mental illness all along