Meatloaf extraordinaire @sp-eye-ral - Tumblr Blog

some of you need to re-learn the word "selfish" and stop calling everyone a fucking narcissist

i could never handle immortality not because of any existential reasons but because i know itd make my procrastination so much worse. catch me putting off tasks for decades. catch me putting off tasks for centuries. what do you mean that movie ive been meaning to get around to became lost media 40 years ago. what do you mean that landmark ive been meaning to visit has been eroded. oooh i got PLANY of time..............

creekfiend

even if your clothing is made of natural fibers the thread is usually polyester. the sexy crow boy will suck the threads out of your 100% cotton t shirts like pasghetti

This is why I have no sympathy whatsoever for anti-intellectuals who complain when discussion posts use too much academic language. "You can't expect me to whip out a dictionary every time you post—" BITCH I LOOKED UP "AHEGAO" FOR YOU. OUT OF THE GOODNESS OF MY HEART.

freesnooki-deactivated20220131

Imagine for a moment you’re one of Lou Wilson’s new neighbors. This guy moves in driving the joker-mobile. He gives you his number and when your call goes to voicemail you’re treated to a full gospel choir. One day you catch a glimpse through his window and he’s just scratching hundreds of scratch-off lottery tickets. He owns two jet skis.

playtwewy

hjartasalt

Not now kitten daddy's googling his symptoms

hjartasalt

Daddy has five days left to live

hjartasalt

Daddy wishes to be cremated

hjartasalt

It's what daddy would have wanted

hjartasalt

Hi. Everyone else go home this is the only tag that matters to me

drumlincountry

If your life is horrible and you need a new source of meaning and direction.... Do NOT find religion. Learn to identify plants.

cookinguptales

vic michaelis, the madlad that you are

raccoonmilf

Shoutout to my dad who accidentally moved into an up and coming black lgbt neighborhood and was very disappointed to learn that all of his “new friends” weren’t actually interested in how to use iNaturalist or where he saw coyotes on his walks 😔🙏🏻

raccoonmilf

You misunderstand. My father has accidentally been on multiple dates now with multiple guys he was hoping wanted to be friends 😅

raccoonmilf

Oh bless him

argumate

A trading card game consisting of real-life ojisan (middle-aged men) are going viral with kids in the city of Kawara in Fukuoka Prefecture.

draconym

I love absolutely everything about this. I want to make trading cards for everyone in my neighborhood. I want to receive these instead of business cards. I want to build a deck around my local electrician and mail carrier and ice cream truck driver.