Two of Us
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Two of Us
Bro imagine being coworkers with Stratt and Grace working on the Hailmary like id be so excited to clock in every damn day to see my scary aah boss and her weird ambiguous situationship guy follow her around like a lost dog the whole shift. The workplace tea must've gone crazy there. Especially once they realized Grace got sent to space like
WHY DID YOU LEAVE THIS IN THE TAGS THIS IS FUNNY AS SHITT PLSS 😭😭
Rocky kind of gets slow boiled into his relationship with grace and doesn't define it. because why would he? He spends the first few days in denial that he can feel anything for this alien at all, and when he's finally ready to confront it, well. Rocky's going to go home alone after this. So it's literally not a problem. GRACE never asks to define what they are or what it means, either, so. Leaving it unstated is fine. So the sexual tension culminates in more and more frequent masturbation sessions and egg extraction and so on until its time for everyone to go home. And now it's time for everyone to forget about the weird half a year you let your alien friend jerk off in front of you and squeeze eggs out of your ovaries for health and pleasure. And that's sad, and you like this thing a lot, like it brought you peace and happiness at your worst and you nearly died for it and it for you and you DON'T want to leave it and be alone again, but it's for the best. So you say goodbye and start your trip back and can't help but wonder if your partner has moved on yet, or how fast they will want to when they meet the version of you that exists now after everything.
Then the taumoeba leak happens, and surprise! Grace is going to come live with you and die on your home planet!!! Isn't that fun? Do you want to commentate while I jerk off tonight before I go to sleep? I'm so excited to meet your mate :) I only live for 40 more years btw.
and that's when Rocky really starts to panic.
Avatar peglarpapers Reblogged Avatar synthyk Badge image.Badge image.Badge image.Badge image.Badge image. Rocky kind of gets slow boiled into his relationship with grace and doesn't define it. because why would he? He spends the first few days in denial that he can feel anything for this alien at all, and when he's finally ready to confront it, well. Rocky's going to go home alone after this. So it's literally not a problem. GRACE never asks to define what they are or what it means, either, so. Leaving it unstated is fine. So the sexual tension culminates in more and more frequent masturbation sessions and egg extraction and so on until its time for everyone to go home. And now it's time for everyone to forget about the weird half a year you let your alien friend jerk off in front of you and squeeze eggs out of your ovaries for health and pleasure. And that's sad, and you like this thing a lot, like it brought you peace and happiness at your worst and you nearly died for it and it for you and you DON'T want to leave it and be alone again, but it's for the best. So you say goodbye and start your trip back and can't help but wonder if your partner has moved on yet, or how fast they will want to when they meet the version of you that exists now after everything. Then the taumoeba leak happens, and surprise! Grace is going to come live with you and die on your home planet!!! Isn't that fun? Do you want to commentate while I jerk off tonight before I go to sleep? I'm so excited to meet your mate :) I only live for 40 more years btw. and that's when Rocky really starts to panic. #PREV TAGS EVERYONE IS GOING TO KNOW HE FUCKED THE HOLES CREATURE!!!!! #it’s so so so important to me that he is just absolutely refusing to address this until the last possible moment. #45 minutes out from Erid he puts a shirt on and drops the Four Years Of Cheating bomb and grace (malnourished) is like. wwhat. #guy for whom The Future was for 46 years sublimated into the endless horrible Present #and now it’s like oh my god. oh my god. It’s Coming For Me #and also the Holes Creature is starving to death. which would solve many of his problems but also he Would Kill Himself. so. <- prev
i think the difference between sex and gender as highlighted in phm is fascinating. gender as a concept is completely absent in eridian culture. sex is something rocky definitely had with that earth creature
me watching phm: haha i bet tumblr is gonna want ryan gosling to fuck the rock
me now: they have such a deep bond it transcends platonic or romantic, they’re soulmates who somehow met against all odds, they have nothing and everything in common. also the rock would fuck him not the other way around.
Phm from Adrian's perspective is just what if you were Penelope and Odysseus came home but he also brought a jellyfish and keeps begging you to build a fish tank for the jellyfish and make jellyfish food for the jellyfish and youre an ancient Greek whos never seen a jellyfish and you cant even comprehend how your going to do it but youre going to because if you dont Odysseus may kill himself. And also the jellyfish can do like. Witchcraft.
choosing to believe within my own beautiful mind that (holding space for book canon in which eridians do wear clothes) that rocky wearing this:
over his naked ass carapace has essentially equivalent implications to eridians as this:
has to humans
#im bullshitting but im having fun. #he’s in too deep. he can’t give up the game now. 46 years alone on a space ship hanging out naked bc well why not. #and now you’re maintaining this lie while elbow deep in several generationally complex mechanical problems. #where are you supposed to put your tools? cloaca? no. no. hold fast. toolbelt over bare ass. the alien will never have to know #until oops! this alien’s actually coming to live with you forever and you’ve spent the past six months bullshitting enormously. #rocky. rocky. never change
a what if scenario, suggested by Birdy :,)
Thinking about what the meaning of "You believe in God?" "It's better than the alternative" becomes when specifically Eva Stratt says it. Better than the alternative, which is that there is no power in all of this that is higher than me
the gracerocky sex tape that earth receives in the beetles is not actually a sex tape as such it’s a blurry whiteboard half in frame in the back of a video log created on day 26 of chain making after they’ve both gone completely insane. most of the whiteboard is covered in absolutely incomprehensible handwritten equations save for a single clean patch in the bottom right corner which has a straight up xenonite dildo suckered to it. just like left there absentmindedly. this of course triggers perhaps the first galactically significant rpf speculation in history
#like people are on twitter being like can you freaks stop being culturally insensitive it’s probably like a really mundane eridian tool.#quote tweet you know who else is a mundane tool. you for entertaining any other possibility other than that rock getting it in.
#prev yeah i'm not sure it's possible for grace to edit the logs i think it's a black box situation. safety feature. #so if they fucked on the ship at any point before the beetles got sent back? it's in there. Earth Knows. #however. absentminded xenonite dildo is such a beautiful word picture. i like to believe this happened.
Everybody now, we're gonna turn this thing around!
Grace and Rocky, giving a tour of the Hail Mary to fascinated Eridian scientists and diplomats.
Pointing at things and explaining what they are and how the ship works, lots of awed and appreciative noises are made.
Until one of the visiting Eridians points out a specific item. “And that?”
It’s a strange, circular thing, a xenonite disk mounted upright on some sort of pivot so it can spin freely, but around the edges it has… spokes? Pegs? Sticking out of it, that hit against a stiff flap that would slow down the spinning.
It is also separated into sections decorated with crude etchings of a human and an Eridian.
“Ah,” Grace says.
“That,” Rocky says.
“That’s. Um.” Grace seems somewhat embarrassed. “That’s the sacrifice wheel.”
“It just means you have to work double as hard as most people!”
Well maybe I don’t WANT to work double as hard as abled people!! Maybe I deserve a BREAK!! Maybe I’ve been working MORE THAN double as hard for MY WHOLE LIFE and it’s led me to immense burnout & caused me to develop several MORE disabilities!! Maybe I should be ACCOMMODATED so I don’t have to KILL MY BODY AND BRAIN over trying to do what abled people can do!! Maybe I DON’T have to work double as hard!! Maybe if there’s the option to let me NOT work double as hard, I should have it, because I’m already working double as hard JUST TO SURVIVE!!
Why do you think disabled people deserve less rest than mentally & physically abled people?
Dude, your glasses
Being hairy is so awesome #mammal