DEAR READER
Discoholic šŖ©
JBB: An Artblog!
cherry valley forever
ojovivo
I'd rather be in outer space šø
we're not kids anymore.
AnasAbdin
Cosmic Funnies
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
KIROKAZE
almost home
Origami Around
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dirt enthusiast
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
Janaina Medeiros
styofa doing anything
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Kaledo Art
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@spazz981
imagine seinfeld but if jerry had.... an inquisitive mind..
I just meant if jerry wanted more information but I can see how you might have understood this as me proposing a bicurious seinfeld
Not that there's anything wrong with that
not that there's anything wrong with that
Gosh Iād love to give it a try. Itās just so hard to find the time with all the *describes a daily schedule that is 65% dilly-dallying*
we gotta get back to torrent distribution, i just watched someone eat eight grand in bandwidth charges because they ran a direct-download piracy site with local file hosting through cloudflare. torrents were invented literally for this exact reason
torrents work like this
i have a file or folder on my pc that i want to share with other people. let's call it gayshit.mp3
unfortunately gayshit.mp3 is 750mb and im not paying for discord nitro so i need another way to send it
i put it into qbittorrent and it makes a torrent file. this is essentially a very small file that points to gayshit.mp3 so other computers can find it. kinda like a treasure map
i send this tiny file to my friend, who loads it into qbittorrent. their computer takes a moment to find mine over the vast expanse of cyberspace and then (as long as my pc is running and the file is still where it should be), it gets copied from my hard drive to theirs
this is the cool part: if somebody else loads that tiny file, they can download it from both of us. if i'm offline but my friend is on, the third person can still get it. this also means that if two people have separate halves of the file, they can download the other half from each other. as long as some combination of people have the pieces between them, they can all have the whole thing.
crucially this does not require a server!!! you can just upload the file to a few people and as long as they keep it, it's still accessible. as long as somebody, somewhere is still connected, it's available forever. the only way it goes away is if everybody disconnects from it.
please learn to torrent
An expert guide to get started using torrentsTorrents are one of the most popular forms of file sharing on the internet, accounting for over
always use qbittorrent, do not use bittorrent or utorrent.
I just really hate the word "fandom". It's just a portmanteau of "fan" and "random". It sounds like some desperate attempt to be quirky and different. Plus, the word "fanbase" already exists.
idk, i thought it was fan + kingdom, or fanatic + domain??
but yeah, it is a bit weird how we have āfandomā when āfanbaseā already existed? but thatās language for you, always changing all the time
Actually, Anon, fandom is significantly older than fan base or fanbase; the OED gives the first known citation of fandom meaning āthe community of fans of a thingā from 1903, while their first entry for fan base isnāt until the 1970s. If you compare the frequencies of the two terms in Google Ngram Viewer, youāll see that fandom has historically been far more frequent, with fan base running a distant second (and the closed form fanbase an even more distant third).
The OED also rejects your portmanteau hypothesis, though I suppose sportswriters from the 1900s mightāve been trying to be quirky and different when they coined fandom from the productive derivational suffix -dom,Ā which the OED also gives copies examples of throughout the 1800s (including BA-dom, old fogey-dom, blizzard-dom and theater-dom.
Respect the fandom, guys. Itās older than Steve Rogers.Ā
So, seeing as the OED does not provide free access to its sources, I looked this up. According to various webpages, included this one, āfandomā was used in 1903 by the Cincinnati Enquirer to refer to baseball fans.
Thus not only do we have an early example of a word that combines āfanaticā with ā-domā as in ākingdomā, we also have a useful reminder that when it comes to excessively liking things to the point of it being its own subculture, people who are into sports have the rest of us beat by several orders of magnitude.
It's hard to say this without sounding like a right wing dickhead, but the thing about progressive spaces is that they may naturally attract people who are always on the lookout for excuses to start a fight. Like you can find yourself faced with someone whose political outrage is totally justified, and whose humanitarian ideals are right on the money, but simultaneously they are carrying a ton of psychological baggage about being wronged and getting revenge, and they will exploit literally any opportunity to live out this psychodrama with anyone in their line of vision. I have thought of several related anecdotes since I started typing this post, but I'll limit myself to the thing that inspired it, which is that I just visited this ultra-lefty cafe/bike shop/community gathering space where I've heard that the proprietor is constantly in a fight with everyone around her. When I paid for my stuff I noticed that there was no tip option, but I thought I had heard something about this, so I snuck away to look at the website and it made me really glad I didn't ask! I think there should have been a really enticing and exciting way for her to say "I've decided to be the change I want to see in the world, so I'm paying my baristas a full living wage, I'm making sure EVERYONE feels welcome and comfortable here, and I'm selling products I believe in!" -- but instead all the web copy sounded more like "You're either with me or against me, you're a fucking piece of shit asshole if you can't handle the inclusive atmosphere here, and by the way tipping is for fascist cavemen and if you ever try to tip someone you are refusing to relate to them authentically and you are enforcing a dangerous and evil power dynamic that should be purged from human society (so therefore I pay my staff well)." Like everything she stood for was totally agreeable, but why did she have to put it like it was directed at her worst enemy, rather than at the kinds of people she wants to attract? If the word on the street is to be believed, the reason for this posturing is that she spends quite a lot of energy making as many enemies as possible, and she probably likes it that way. I guess I'm just reminding myself, and perhaps others, that while one might think of "politics" as being broadly social and theoretical, no individual can fully separate the political from the intimately personal. Even somebody who seems to want to uplift and protect their fellow humans may be getting some perverse inner satisfaction out of that valiant crusade, and you may never realize it until you find yourself in a confusing fight with them.
I ran a LARP for a few years explicitly aimed at being queer friendly and accessible, and eventually cut it short mainly for this exact reason. You wouldnāt believe the amount of abuse my staff and I took for reasons that felt genuinely insane. I got called ableist for telling someone they couldnāt be invincible in my game of make believe, more than once. Defended myself, multiple Jewish players, and a conversion student from accusations of antisemitism based on alleged lore weād never written / suggested / that simply and plainly did not exist in game. Had a staffer try to talk to someone about how a joke she made was uncomfortable only for this person to retaliate in epic proportions full white woman crocodile tears style, trying to get this staffer removed and eventually escalating into a full public hate campaign when she didnāt get her way. All thatās still just the tip of the iceberg.
Progressive spaces are naturally populated by traumatized people, and unfortunately trauma makes people more difficult. (Iām not excluded in that. No one is.) Running a progressive space is doubly difficult because a lot of left-facing trauma was inflicted by authority, so youāre setting yourself up to be the windmill that someone tilts their displaced rage at. I donāt really know what the solution is, but I do know that this is one of the huge reasons itās so hard to find community: the people with a bone to pick canāt reach the ones who actually hurt them, but theyāll sure find you along the way, and the safer they feel around you the safer theyāll feel coming after you.
Once again I am begging everyone to read Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It by Chris Voss.
Voss spent 25 years as a hostage negotiator, meaning that his job was to talk to guys on the phone who had literal guns to innocent people's heads. He KNOWS how to compassionately de-escalate a conflict and have productive, constructive conversations with people who are highly activated and reactive.
Especially if you are neurodivergent, read this book. The communication tools are specific, concrete, easy to implement, and will dramatically reduce the psychic damage you're taking just from trying to navigate the conversation.
holy shit its for real
ohmygod gang. I just figured out how to create a fake click-to-remove ad in an ao3 fic
am I about to be a menace to some poor fandom? I have an idea for a fic written in tabloid form...
Wait op can this power be learned?
In the basic form, you can actually do it directly in the fic itself without even needing to use a workskin. You just need to use two html tags: details and summary.
<details open> <summary> text you want the button to have </summary> <img src="linktotheimageofthead.jpg"> </details>
Specifying that the details section is open makes it so that the "ad" is visible when the page loads. The reader then click/taps on the triangle button next to the text to close it.
I also put everything inside a center tag so they'd be in the middle of the page.
The way that I made the button look different was through CSS code in a workskin - but I'll share that once I've done some other funky things lol
AO3 š TAGS š ARE š NOT š SPOILERS š
iām so tired of authors not tagging correctly because they donāt want to āspoil the ficā
correctly tagging your fic allows readers who DONāT want to read things like major character death, gore, mpreg or whatever may be their squick to filter your fic out from the main ship/fandom tag. not including the correct tags on your fic is harmful to readers and iām tired of pretending itās not.
ādonāt like donāt readā great! i wonāt! tag your fic correctly next time ffs
if you fear a tag will ruin the plot or reveal a twist write that in the notes at the beginning and a detailed warning in the end notes!
Ao3's tag system is a great tool that helps sensitive readers take more educated risks, but if we're jumping all the way to 'if you don't tag my squick then you are HARMING me' then we've gone waaay too far.
(If OP had just been talking about failing to follow Ao3's rules around the major warnings that would be one thing, but they also threw in 'mpreg or whatever may be their squick' so now it's rant time.)
I do think warning your readers about major common squicks outside the archive warnings is a great impulse! I do it myself! And yet it's also true that literally anything can be a squick or trigger. A potential trigger may seem obvious to you while being totally unnoticeable to the author, and vice versa. Maybe you remembered to tag mpreg, but did you tag for needles? Vomiting? Menstruation? Blood? Doctor's offices? Drug use (because the character takes tylenol one time)? Car crashes? Underage drinking (that isn't considered underage in your country of residence or the time period in which your story is set)? Fatphobia? Character skipping meals? Racial slurs (against Vulcans)? Child endangerment? These are all things that might be reasonably expected to squick or trigger readers because they bring to mind real-world awfulness. I see all of these used as content tags sometimes, but waaaaay less than they 'should' be if authors were truly obligated to protect us from being squicked. And that's not even getting into common narrative or sexual squicks that might be a huge deal to some (unprotected sex, unlubed anal sex, rimming, ass to mouth, breeding kink, daddy kink, undernegotiated D/S, etc) but are so entirely within the realm of normal for others it would never occur to them to tag.
I certainly encourage authors to use tags to help readers find what they're looking for and avoid what they don't want, but enthusiasm for Ao3's tagging system can go too far, wherein readers with specific squicks or triggers begin to hold authors more accountable than they hold themselves. Tagging literally everything is impossible, and there is no fandom consensus on what has to be tagged other than the standard archive warnings.
Creating a new fandom consensus on what MUST be tagged beyond the existing consensus of rape, under-18 sex, graphic violence, and major character death would be incredibly fraught. Standardizing a warning is a powerful normative act, one that can easily inflate existing personal feelings into harsher moral judgments. "We all agree this topic is so upsetting it MUST be warned for" is one step down from declaring a topic entirely taboo. And that has consequences. Victims of rape and child abuse talk about how psychologically damaging it can be to have to cordon off a major part of your own life experiences lest they discomfort others; it can easily feel like you yourself are being declared a blight rather than the harm that was done to you.
Awareness of this impact is why I confess I do find it concerning that the untagged sqicks people get most vocal about tend to involve deviation from sex and gender norms. I understand that pregnancy is a horrifying threat to many fanfic readers and that a lot of us have deep discomfort with our sexual traits, which can naturally lead to us only being able to enjoy a narrower slice of available fictional content, but I never see anybody up in arms about undeniably negative shit like untagged car crashes the way I see some people up in arms about having to occasionally encounter neutral things like untagged mpreg or omegaverse or gender-atypical genitalia.
This is always especially unnerving to me when the offending topic is something that is both inherently morally neutral and entirely possible to encounter among real-life strangers in a positive context. Sure, getting hit with a wave of gender dysphoria when you're trying to read erotica is a bad time, and it's entirely logical to want to select your erotica according to your own genital preferences, but the level of moral outrage people occasionally exhibit when they encounter unexpected genital configurations in erotic fanfic tends to be, uh, pretty unmistakably hostile towards trans bodies, even when it's coming from trans people. Like, okay, say mpreg is a trigger for you because you associate it with threats of corrective rape and you don't want to read about it in your escapist fanficāfair enough. Do you also ask real pregnant trans men in real life to put content warnings on their happy selfies of themselves just existing? Do you get why that would be fucked up? Do you get how it would be extra fucked up to make that request mandatory at an institutional level? Especially if cis pregnancy didn't require any warnings?
Then there's the structural question.
Ao3 content tags were designed to be used positivelyāthe 'exclude' feature did not exist at launchāand as such there was an implied expectation that if you tagged your story as x, you were putting the tag there for people who might want to filter FOR stories with x. That meant a very brief mention of x occurring offscreen wouldn't merit an x tag; nobody came to a fic tagged Arranged Marriage expecting to hear about the main character's cousin having an arranged marriage.
The recent push to use content tags as warnings has led to aggressive overtagging of minor mentions of x, making the x tag less and less useful as a positive filter. This is somewhat mitigated by people using 'minor x' or 'x mention' instead of clogging the 'x' tag (shoutout to people putting background ships in the content tags instead of the ship tags!) which I appreciate. However, this points to a fundamental tension in the practical use of Ao3 tags now that we do have the 'exclude' feature.
If the point is to help readers avoid things, authors will tag very differently than if the point is to help readers find things they might like. And the original structural design of content tags was to help readers find things they might like. Ao3 is firstly for authors to archive their fics and secondarily to help readers find those fics. Only thirdly is it optimized to help readers NOT find fics.
Talking like the 'correct' use of Ao3 tags is to optimize exclusion means you've got your understanding of Ao3 tags backwards.
tl;dr:
there is no standardized list of minor archive warnings; squicks/triggers are so varied it would be impossible to mandate warning for all of them
mandating warnings for x inherently imposes a structural & cultural penalty against x content
ao3 is structured to favor positive content tags (help readers find) over warning tags (help readers avoid)
Authors can be expected to tag the stuff they personally find most relevant about their fic, in much the same way a book in the library has a few major keywords attached. More granular content warnings are a bonus. If you as a reader are highly sensitive to encountering a type of content that falls outside of the major archive warnings, you have to take responsibility for that yourself; it will never be reasonable to 100% conclude that a given fic lacks your squick just because your squick isn't tagged. Unless somebody is blatantly lying about archive warnings or actively mis-tagging, they are not tagging their fic 'incorrectly.'
It's great to encourage people to tag more comprehensively! Explaining why certain tags are of interest to readers would be a good start, or perhaps explaining how to maximize the use of filterable tags that work as both positive and negative simultaneously. But OP's post is neither helpful nor accurate.
I donāt mean to be rude; but I donāt think Iāve ever seen this, does anyone have any examples?
Supernatural
Doctor Who (Steven Moffat specifically)
Sherlock (Steven Moffat specifically)
Actually Steven Moffat is basically just this sentiment given human form.
A version of this happened with The Magicians, tbh. Though instead of expectation: men, reality: women it was expectation: smug nihilists, reality: mentally ill queer folks.
Arguably Game of Thrones.
If we broaden it outside of televisionā¦I think Star Wars falls into this, at least the sequel trilogy. Maybe the MCU as well. And I canāt help but think of every band thatās ever complained that their fanbase is mostly women. 5 Seconds of Summer comes immediately to mind.
In general, most white male creators seem to have this massively entitled mindset where they wantāand think they deserveāthe time, attention, and enthusiasm that creative fandom (i.e. the side of fandom more dominated by women) is known for.
They want our eyes for ratings, our word-of-mouth for free publicity, our metas for social media buzz, and our spending power for merch and cons. But they donāt want us. And they donāt really want the responsibility of telling a story to a thoughtful, engaged audience, regardless of that audienceās demographic makeup. They just want to be praised for whatever schlock they cough up.
And like any other spoiled brat, they will break their toys before they share them.
It goes all the way to the top for kids shows. Toy sales will crash a show. Makes sense, but if those toys are gendered for boys instead of the female viewers, they wonāt usually switch up the marketing and move them to the girl aisle. They cancel the show outright.
Mind you it is perfectly possible to make the switch in marketing, but execs would rather throw it all out than have something that doesnāt perform well with male viewers. For example the Rey merch was not expected to be popular, for some reason, there had to be public outcry to get merch of one of the main 3 protagonists. A PROTAGONIST. The fact that she wasnāt a huge part of the 1st launch says a lot already.
And what happened when female fans got too invested in the Sequel Trilogy? The entire writers room didnāt necessarily lash out, but they sure forgot how to behave.
Young Justice
Paul Dini: Superhero cartoon execs donāt want largely female audiences
#WhereIsRey (initial)
#WhereIsRey (ongoing)
The older, male generation of 'Star Wars' fans may be losing interest in the franchise, but female fans are stepping up.
Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker was designed to be the opposite of The Last Jedi
Youāre all sitting on the hot take of the decade tbh
And yet when they fond out that boys were watching MLP:FIM in droves, they had NO PROBLEM with it.
#SONS OF ANARCHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!#LITERALLY SONS OF ANARCHY IS THE BIGGEST EXAMPLE OF THIS LIKE EVER#kurt sutter wrote that show for MEN and ended up with an overwhelmingly female audience#because heās actually a good writer and knows how to develop characters well and wrote excellent female characters#but once he realized that his audience was almost entirely women he literally took it out on tara and gemma in the show#but like tara specifically#he resented her character for being a huge draw for female viewers so he tore her development to shreds and killed her#in the most brutal gut wrenching way possible#kurt sutter you will pay for your crimes#i actually wrote a manifesto about this on one of my old blogs i should try to find it sldkjsldfjsdljf#long post (via@m-oonknight)
OMG YES. I LOVED Sons of Anarchy, especially the women and then I got to season 6 and it was like - everything was just tossed in the trash? And like, why did Sutter hate that Tara drew tons of attention? That should have been a good thing! He should have been like āHey folks, this girlās getting us more viewers, letās put her in more scenes!ā It just doesnāt make sense to me. MEN donāt make sense to me.
The 100 too. Iāll never forget how Jason Rothenberg would attacked female fans on Twitter and mock them in interviews, and then post links to male fan discussions on Reddit to praise and thank them. In his goodbye letter to the show he SPECIFICALLY thanked Reddit and it was so disgusting.
Star Trek from TNG on was also a boyās club, even though the TOS fans were mostly women. Women, in fact, who literally created modern fandom with their zines. But after TNG it was all, āWomen donāt understand Star Trek, only smart men hur dur.ā
I think it would be harder for us to find examples of when this DIDNT happen than when it did. It happens all the time.
Doesnāt stop it from boggling the mind
(though it could probably start to make some sense if you follow the money past audience bases to maybe a couple of investors or like a rich patron ā¦ š¤)
Stooooop I just wrote a masters thesis on this shit. Media creation and distribution is a means by which dominant power structures consolidate their hegemony. Dominantly situated creators get upset when the audience they attract isnāt the audience they wanted, because they view the whole creation and sharing of the fiction as an exercise to sustain kyriarchal conditions that benefit themselves. When the audience is Other, they see it as a failure of those efforts and lash out.
Simply, theyāre trying to assert a particular worldview via fiction, and upon getting confronted with something else, begin foot stamping. Itās not just men wanting male attention and gatekeeping. Itās that the fiction in the first place was an attempt to curate dominance and whoopsie! they miscalculated.
(anyway if anyone wants to read 35k words of philosophy about this, hmu)
Hey folks, for anyone that was interested in the thesis (firstly thank you so much for reaching out I really appreciate the interest) the following is an open access link to download it. Please let me know if it doesnāt work for some reason. Comments are now restricted so canāt put it there, but I hope you see this if you were interested!
Iād also love to hear your thoughts, as I literally wrote it for communities like ours to read, so, thanks.
Fictions are a cornerstone of human cultures: they are created, shared, discussed, modified, and valued. Yet, philosophical accounts which p
(a realization about dialogue formatting, from a comic artist turned novelist.)
One of the first things a novice writer learns about speech tags is that theyāre part of the āscaffoldingā of prose. They should be largely invisible to the reader: use them when necessary, omit them when not, and be sparing in the application of verbs other than āsaidā. They serve only the function of clarifying who is speaking when it is necessary to do so.
Except:
Sometimes you might want to use a speech tag in spite of the redundancy. The fact that the readerās eyes slide right over them is an exploitable property. By slicing a line of dialogue in half with a speech tag, you can force the reader to perceive a meaningful pause between two utterancesāand the effect is much stronger than you might get out of an ellipsis or an em dash. Developing an intuition for when and how to do this is a huge part of learning to write dialogue, I think.
(And yes: if you ever wondered, this is exactly same the reason why comic artists sometimes ādouble bubbleā their speech bubbles. Same end, different means!)
This is in no way meant to disparage my peers, but it is very funny coming from the kind of niche cultural touchstones of tumblr and connecting with other artists. I'm experiencing the reverse of that xkcd comic, where I'm like "yeah I'm not as on the cutting edge as I should be - I never read Chainsaw Man or played through Disco Elysium, and I only read House of Leaves once when I was in high school" and they go "what's House of Leaves?"
House of Leaves depicts a cognitohazard that draws people into an obsession that demands to be shared and spread. Every set of fingerprints on the text remains embedded as it passes hands.
House of Leaves makes a nest in your mind. It lives there. Remains there. It then demands to be shared. You are just doing the bidding of the book. As Navidson dragged in the documentary crew. As the documentary drew in Zampano. As Zampano's essay drew in Johnny. As Johnny's analysis drew in The Editors.
You were compelled to enter the labyrinth.
You are now compelled to spread it to others. Through your art. Your analysis. Your Tumblr postsĀ¹.
Ā¹- See CamDawn's #the word houseĀ² in these tags is written in blue tag for examples. Ā²- The word house cannot be written in blue in tags due to Tumblr formatting. The tag is a reference to this fact and an attempt to ensure that the jokeĀ³ is maintained. Ā³ - CamDawn's blog attempts to highlight house in blue each time she uses it. Tumblr too, though not always. Her Masterpost has highlighted tags for ones that are used more often. House of Leaves entry only has the word house written in blue. This is one example of CamDawn's obsessive need to make multilayered jokes that only she knows the links to. An example of which can be found in the #these tags are like an ogreā“ tag. ā“ - The movie Shrek (2001) contains a conversation between Shrek and Donkey in which Shrek compares ogres to onions due to them both containing layers.
I like how in the first post House is in blue when Molly says it but not when the others ask about it, like the blue color is a part of having been exposed to it and the others are, as yet, uninfected.
Some behind the scenes for you: I'm color blind so I almost accidentally made it purple
Listen, I'm having fun playing with the ultra patriotic voice, but after a couple years in blue-collar landscaping jobs, you really do need to phrase things like that.
"I'm pretty sure that fella ain't here legally."
"Well, that ain't your business Chip, it's his."
They hate being preached to. If you pull out words like 'gender wage gap' they'll tell you you're brainwashed by the far left media.
"He's one of them transgenders."
"He got freedoms too, Jimmy."
Also, please understand that SO often the real issue these people have is that they just want to say something inappropriate. They don't like being told they can't say "fag", so they'd say it for a reaction, just like a teenager would.
Shut down the conversation without reacting.
"His dick, not mine" will get you much further to shutting that guy down than "well it's really inappropriate to call someone a slur while I'm the job site".
And that's the point. To shut them up. To make them quit saying shit like that. The first one makes him seem kinda weird for caring about what that guy does with his dick. The second one gives him something to fight against and make a big deal about.
code-switching matters for communicating across cultures of all varieties
Cannot overstate how many flavours of bullshit disguised as political opinion can be shut down by ānone of my businessā or ādonāt be rudeā
The entire point of, OK, my phone really wants to call it Anastasia so I guess weāre doing that? The entire point of Anastasia (as administered by a board-certified Anastasiologist) during sugary. Sugary? Havenāt I suffered enough? The entire point of Anastasia during augury. Jesus Christ. Hold up. You know what, augury is preferable to sugary. Augury is obviously performed by an auger (makes sense if you give it a think) whereas sugary is performed byā¦? A sugardaddy? NO THANK YOU. Anyway. The entire point of Anastasia is so that you donāt know what music your sturgeon. Fuck right off. Was playing. While you were under. Youāre not supposed to wake up from Anastasia and immediately realize you managed to get earwormed by Motƶrheadās āAce of Spadesā during your sugary.
when i was a kid i was so mad all the time bc i thought someday i'd have to be somebody's wife i didn't know it was optional. is everybody reminding the young girls in their lives that it's optional.
AND SO IS BEING SOMEBODY'S MOTHERā¼ļø
it is about being a woman. hope that helps!
reading comprehension questions for the notes:
is wanting to be a wife and mother a requirement for being a woman?
why might OP be annoyed with replies assuming that this post is about being aroace or transmasc if a woman doesnāt want to be a wife or mother?
are there reasons unrelated to sexuality and romantic interest that might make a woman not want to be a wife or mother?
are there reasons unrelated to gender identity and expression that might make a woman not want to be a wife and mother?
core concept: what is gender essentialism?
is it gender essentialism to imply that all women inherently want to be wives and mothers? could this be what OP is critiquing?
look at the notes OP responds to. is it gender essentialism to imply that being a wife and mother is so affixed to womanhood that to not want to be those things means youāre incapable of sexual/romantic feelings, or not a woman?
what trait are you perpetuating when you assume that women who do not want to be wives and mothers must be aroace or trans? is it gender essentialism?
saw someone trying to roast this guy on reddit but all the comments were just like "fuck off, that's based"
nature is healing
FUCK YEAH.
