valen @spencstan - Tumblr Blog

hi whoever is reading this :))

i'm valen (any pronouns) i post about basically whatever i'm obsessed with at the moment. umm the grishaverse, pjo/hoo, the marauders, b99, marvel, etc.

i draw and paint and i'm want to practice more so i accept request for characters or whatever idk

i have a tiktok acc where i post my art the @ is: @/queerartist24

my art:

digital painting

grishaverse:

wesper (jesper and wylan) sketch

wesper again

nina zenik

kuwei, jes and wylan

helnik (matthias and nina)

inej

inej again

s&b stills:

sketch

^ that sketch but only the crows (and better?

and no one cares but i'm re-reading books so i'll leave the posts here so i can find them when i want to see my fav quotes lmao (this is actually really helpful i recommend it)

grishaverse

shadow and bone trilogy

six of crows and crooked kingdom

--------------------

cemetery boys

#idk how to tag this #art #?#drawing #grishaverse #idk maybe

theseheroes

yes i’m that person who’s unhealthy obsessed with the fact that leo and piper and the only 2 that were friends before they were demigods

bunkernine

Leo having two foster moms and having relationship issues with Calypso, taking relationship advice from Reyna and Apollo of all people, and then having best friend Piper dating a girl, is literally the funniest ending for him, because he's sooooooo close. He is so close. He's right there. He is soooo close. Only one thing can really perfect this. One thing. 🤏

tedcruzisthezodiackiller

“all queer media is one dimensional, tropey, mass market, and made for teenagers-” not true. look harder

Memorial: Mike and Benson have been together for a few years and are in the middle of determining if they’re going to stay together when Mike learns that his estranged father is terminally ill, and goes to Japan to reconcile with him before his death. meanwhile Mike’s mother stays with Benson in the US. my favorite part of the novel was the part in Japan, exploring the relationship between Mike and his father (TW for racism and abuse)

the luminous dead: w/w romance between a spelunker on a mission on an alien planet and the women who hired her for unknown reasons, who’s stationed on the surface and communicates with the mc through her high-tech caving suit. toxic but intriguing romance, killing eve and TMA fans you will enjoy this (TW for graphic descriptions of injury)

The Vanished Birds: explores a society that was created after the Earth has been environmentally destroyed and humanity has moved onto space stations, and all space travel and commerce is controlled by corporations. queerness isn’t the focus of this book but many of the main characters are queer. beautiful writing, will make you super depressed in the best way (TW for child abuse)

The Color Purple: Celie is separated from her sister in childhood when she’s forced into an abusive marriage by her father, but she continues to write to her over the years. an important part of the novel is the relationship that develops between Celie and her husband’s lover Shug. what I love about this book is that its an important look at misogynoir and abuse of vulnerable people, but Celie ultimately gets her happy ending. (TW for abuse, racism, sexual assault, incest)

The Miseducation of Cameron Post: the first half chronicles the early life of Cameron, a closeted lesbian growing up in rural Montana in the 90′s. the second half is about Cameron’s experience in a conversion camp. I love the writing of this book, it’s very atmospheric. I felt like I could picture Cameron’s town in my sleep. (TW for conversion therapy, homophobia, self-harm)

boys run the riot: manga, a trans boy who wants to work in men’s fashion one day works with two of his classmates to design and create a clothing line. I’ve only read the first volume so I cant speak on the series as a whole. the MC is only out to some people, so he gets misgendered and still wears the girls’ uniform in school. this might be difficult for some people to read, although there isn’t too much overt transphobia if I remember correctly (at least in the first volume)

The 57 bus: nonfiction, follows the stories of an agender teen who experienced a hate crime, and the boy who attacked them. A tough read, but a really important look at the justice system, racism, transphobia, and restorative justice (TW for transphobia and homophobia, violence, depictions of police and the justice system)

our dreams at dusk: manga series about an LGBT+ center in Japan. follows gay, trans, and asexual characters. an interesting look at queer issues in Japan. also the art is gorgeous (TW for homophobia and transphobia)

in the dream house: memoire about the author’s experience in an abusive sapphic relationship. super important, as abuse in queer relationships is so seldom talked about. hard to read but the writing is very lyrical and poetic, and beautiful (TW for abuse)

ask the passengers: mc is a girl who’s falling in love with another girl, while staying closeted from her gay friends because she’s not sure how to identify. the gimmick of the book is that the mc talks about her problems to airplanes in the sky, and this magically touches the lives of the people in the planes. I felt this part of the book was goofy and honestly I think it would be better without it, but I remember that the journey the mc goes through regarding her sexuality made me feel very seen (TW for homophobia)

king and the dragonflies: written by the author of Felix Ever After. the rest of his books deserve an equal amount of attention. middlegrade, about a boy dealing with the death of his brother and coming to terms with his sexuality. I liked the relationship between King and his family. they weren’t super homophobic but they also weren’t completely accepting at first either, it felt like a very realistic and healthy depiction of a family (TW for homophobia, racism, child abuse)

haven’t personally read, on my tbr: Giovanni’s Room, Nevada, Stone Butch Blues, Oranges Are Not The Only Fruit, My Cat Yugoslavia, My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness

“queer media is all boring period pieces and people getting divorced and experiencing horrible homophobia and tragedy-” not true. look harder

The Magic Fish: graphic novel, a young Vietnamese-American boy reads fairy tales with his mother to help her practice her english, and searches for a way to come out to her. some of my favorite art in a graphic novel, look it up its stunning

Honeygirl: going through quarter life crises and unsure of what to do after earning her PhD, the mc goes to vegas and ends up getting drunkenly married to a woman she doesnt know. the mc’s relationship with academia was very relatable to me

whatever: basically just about the mc fucking around with his friends, being in a band, and discovering that hes gay. a lot of fun, love the characters

anything by Alice oseman: Alice Oseman is the only person I trust to write about the fandom experience in YA fiction. my personal fave is iwbft. disclaimer: I haven’t read solitaire, cant say whether its good or gay

Ivy Aberdeen’s Letter to the World: middlegrade, Ivy’s family’s home is destroyed by a tornado, and shes also dealing with the fact that she’s realizing she’s a lesbian. some internalized homophobia, but everyone in Ivy’s life is really accepting and its very sweet

my love mix-up: manga, mc has a crush on a girl in his class and asks to borrow her eraser, and sees the name of a different boy written on it (this is a popular love charm in Japan). boy #2 sees the mc holding the eraser, and thinks HE has a crush on HIM. very wholesome and funny, and one of the few times I’ve read a manga that actually allows a character to have crushes on people of multiple genders. it deals with homophobia in some cases, which makes it feel grounded in reality, but all of the mc’s friends are very accepting, and its very cute.

The Tarot Sequence: urban fantasy set in a modern magical society, mc is the heir to a family of the magical aristocracy, but since his family was killed he’s fallen from grace, is broke, and works as a mercenary for other powerful families. he tries to unravel the mystery of his family’s death on the side. m/m romance and found family. love the characters and the world building, and the author is planning for this to be a NINE book series. next book is coming out May 2022!! (TW for sexual assault)

In Other Lands: mc gets recruited to go to magical summer camp, except he’s genre-savvy, hates fighting, and misses technology. super funny satire of portal fantasy books, but will also have you aching for the mc? elliot schafer my beloved

havent personally read, on my tbr: a hero at the end of the world, the poster children, tell me how you really feel, heavy vinyl

we absolutely do have a long way to go in regards to queer representation, but it frustrates me to no end when I see post claiming that queer fiction is all one specific type of story. there are lots of queer creators out there writing unique, thoughtful, beautiful stories who deserve our support! if theres a particular type of queer fiction you would like to see, do a little digging because its likely that SOMETHING similar exists. it just doesnt exist on like disney+

also @lgbtqreads is an incredible resource, if you want to read something gay and have a specific genre or type of story in mind I highly recommend looking around on their blog

additional recommendations welcome!

robotpussy

annabeth was written as a smart blonde to break the "dumb blonde" stereotype. annabeth being black is still breaking down stereotypes as black women and girls are often ignored and undermined in academic spaces

mistarover

bitches saying that black annabeth chase "doesn't make sense" as if she wasn't born from the divine thoughts of her godly mama

mytragedyperson

Honestly one of my favourite episodes of community was the one where abed beat troy at sports. Like something about the "nerd" being better at sports than a joke just felt great but also how casual he was about it. Another of my favourites was the one where they try to change abed to get him a girlfriend because the ending where the girl Jeff thought would flirt with him went to Abed instead and Abed not needing help getting people to like him was a nice touch. It's just nice to see the "nerdy guy" who would usually be the butt of the joke winning and being loved is great. Honestly I must love abed, he just seems so chill, like yeah he has his quirks and is autistic but where this could be treated as a bad thing, instead it's just Abed, another part of him. And they all like abed. In a lot of situations he's actually the one that remains calm through it all, and in one episode I'm pretty sure it shows he's actually the sanest one? Like you know the Halloween episode where they think one of them is crazy because of Britta's test but then it turns out she just printed them wrong and they're all crazy except one? I'm pretty sure the sane one was Abed, right? It's also why Pierce doesn't really do anything to him in the episode where he psychologically torments them all. He can't. Honestly Abeds just great.

Of course these are more basic and of course like the Halloween episodes and paintball episodes are great and everything. But these episodes just have a place in my heart for reasons I can't even fully explain.

charleslove

this is the sweetest thing i've ever read

femsolid

I like art that depicts women not posing seductively or gracefully but simply existing as human beings.

sheheisk

Works:

1. Ampio orizzonte by Ettore Tito, 1910 2. Mariana (Millais) by John Everett Millais, 1851 3. Bathing Girls by Paul Gustave Fischer, 1860-1934 4 If a woman reads a book in the forest but no one is there to see it... by Jenna Gribon, 2020 5. The Reader Wreathed with Flowers / Virgil's Muse by Camille Corot, 1845 6. In the Garden by Helena Janecic 7. A girl with her bike looking over the water by Alexander Akopov 8. Girl with a Straw Hat by Francine Van Hove 9. After the Ball by Ramon Casas, 1895 10. Untitled by Francine Van Hove

spencstan

after watching heartstopper i feel like it's my right as a bi woman to ask for some good sapphic friends-to-lovers book recs

gay-in-space5-deactivated202205

hello i have gay books for you.

one last stop, they kinda fall for each other while their becoming friends (super super good)

on a sunbaeam, lesbians in space friends to lovers and then they got separated (everyone is gay)

she drives me crazy, enemies to friends to lovers

leah on the offbeat, sequal to love simon but abt leah and her gay panic over abby but they love happy endings so it’s amazing

spencstan

I read one last stop and it was soo good but thanks for the other recs!!

after watching heartstopper i feel like it's my right as a bi woman to ask for some good sapphic friends-to-lovers book recs

#sapphic #sapphic books #queer book recs #book recs #heartstopper #tara x darcy

thebigqueer

AUGH. THINKING ABOUT THALIA N LEO. NO CUZ leo lives at waystation now & the hunters are at the waystation often and every time leo sees thalia ALL HE CAN THINK ABOUT is the boy he loved because thalias eyes remind him too much of jason her smile reminds him too much of jason he’s literally going insane. and finally he’s like no nope i can’t just pretend like looking at her isn’t driving me insane so he just tells her about jason about how much he loved him and he’s just sooo frustrated about it like he really doesn’t want to tell her but he can’t keep it inside anymore and thalias like ⁉️⁉️ oh man oh jeez,,,, and then wow unexpected bond.

thebigqueer

like literally imagine you are thalia and this kid. this kid who annoyed you so much the first time you met him. he suddenly tells you he’s like deeply in love with your dead brother. and you’re just like… what. what. huh. yeah okay

thebigqueer

and honestly like. thalia doesn’t even know how to REACT she’s like weren’t you the same kid flirting with me the first time we met what happened to you being all macho hetero??? but at the same time she’s like oh i totally expected this. there’s no way this kid was straight to begin with. and her thinking back to the time she literally saw jason ask leo to join him to talk to her,,, she’s just like . i’m never going to be okay again . my brother and his boyfriend were gay for each other and didn’t even know it. i’m going to die right now

star-anise

My girlfriend and I talk a lot about our different generations of queerness, because she was doing queer activism in the 1990s and I wasn’t.

And she’s supportive of my writing about queerness but also kind of bitter about how quickly her entire generation’s history has disappeared into a bland “AIDS was bad, gay marriage solved homophobia” narrative, and now we’re having to play catch-up to educate young LGBTQ+ people about queer history and queer theory. It gets pretty raw sometimes.

I mean, a large part of the reason TERFs have been good at educating the young and queer people haven’t is, in the 80s and 90s the leading lights of TERFdom got tenured university positions, and the leading lights of queerdom died of AIDS.

“Excuse us,” she said bitterly the other day, not at me but to me, “for not laying the groundwork for children we never thought we’d have in a future none of us thought we’d be alive for.”

freedom-of-fanfic

“the reason TERFs have been good at educating the young and queer people haven’t is, in the 80s and 90s the leading lights of TERFdom got tenured university positions, and the leading lights of queerdom died of AIDS.”

aphilologicalbatman-deactivated

thank you for giving me a good reason to finish my dissertation and try to make it in the academy

brs-love

Wait, idk LGBTQ+ history, but they died of AIDS cause, what, hospitals refused to treat them or…?

star-anise

Oh heck yeah.

When an epidemic happens, public health agencies spend millions of dollars trying to understand what happens: Why are people sick or dying? What caused it? Who else is at risk? Government health departments like the Centres for Disease control and private companies both invest hundreds of millions of dollars into preserving public health. This happened in 1977, when military veterans who all attended the same gathering began to get sick with a strange type of pneumonia, with 182 cases and 29 dead, and the CDC traced the illness to a bacterium distributed by the air conditioning system of a hotel they all stayed at, and in 1982, when seven people died of tainted Tylenol, and pharmaceutical companies changed the entire way their products were made and packaged to prevent more deaths.

Meanwhile, the AIDS epidemic took six years to be recognized by the CDC (1975-1981) because at first the only people dying were intravenous drug users, which is to say, heroin addicts; when it was recognized, President Reagan’s government pressured the CDC to spend as little time and money on AIDS as possible, because they literally didn’t think gay lives were important. So yes, hospitals refused to treat them and medical staff treated them as disgusting people who deserved to die, but also, there was very little funding for scientists to understand what this disease was, what caused it, where it came from, how it spread, or how to stop it. The LGBTQ+ community had to organize and fight to get hospitals to treat them, to fund scientific research, to be legally allowed to buy the drugs that kept them alive, and to have access to treatment. An effective treatment for AIDS wasn’t found until 1995.

And it’s ongoing; a lot of the difficulty of fighting AIDS in Africa is that it’s seen as “the gay disease” (and thanks to European colonialism, even African societies that used to be okay with us were taught to think LGBTQ+ people are bad). Even now that we have medications that can treat or prevent AIDS, they’re incredibly expensive and hard to get; in 2015, New York businessman Martin Shkreli acquired the exclusive right to make a drug that treats an AIDS-related disease, and raised its price from $13.50 a pill to $750 a pill.

Here’s one history on what it was like to have and fight AIDS, one history on how politicians responded to the epidemic, and if you can get a copy of the documentary How to Survive a Plague, it’s a good introduction, because it’s about how AIDS patients had to fight for their lives. A lot of these histories are imperfect and incomplete, because privilege played a big part in whose lives and deaths were seen as important–Poor people, people of colour, trans people, and drug addicts were less likely to be able to afford or access medical care, and more likely to die without being remembered; histories often tend to focus on straight people who got AIDS through no fault of their own, and then white cis gay men who seem more “respectable” and “relatable”.

I mean, people who will talk about how homophobia led to neglect of AIDS still find ways not to mention that AIDS isn’t just sexually transmitted; it’s hugely a disease of drug addicts, because sharing needles is a huge way the disease spreads. But because society always thinks, oh, drug addicts are bad and disgusting people and of course criminals, that often gets neatly dropped from the histories, and it’s still hard to get people to agree to things that keep drug addicts alive, like needle exchanges and supervised injection sites. But if you want my rant about how the war on drugs is bullshit used to control poor people and people of colour, and drugs shouldn’t be criminalized, you’ll have to ask for that separately.

elfwreck

They died of AIDS because

Hospitals refused to treat them, and when they did get admitted, treated them like dirt so their will-to-live was eroded - refused to let long-term partners visit them, staff acted like they were disgusting nuisances, etc.

Very little funding was put into finding causes or cures - AIDS was considered “god’s punishment” for immoral behavior by a whole lot of people.

Once causes were understood (effective treatments were a long ways off), information about those causes weren’t widely shared - because it was a “sex disease” (it wasn’t) and because a huge number of the victims were gay or needle-drug users, and the people in charge of disease prevention (or in charge of funding) didn’t care if all of those people just died.

Not until it started hitting straight people and superstar celebrities (e.g. Rock Hudson) did it get treated as A Real Problem - and by that time, it had reached terrifying epidemic conditions.

Picture from 1993:

We lost basically a whole generation of the queer community.

psychoactive-teratogen

As a current AIDS survivor, this is really important information. I was diagnosed not only HIV positive in 2014, but I had already progressed to an AIDS diagnosis. Knowing how far we’ve come with treatment and what the trials and tribulations of those who came before cannot and must not ever be forgotten. Awareness is the number one goal. I often speak to the microbiology students at my university to explain what it’s like to live with, how the medications work, side effects, how it’s affected my daily life, and just raise general awareness.

Before my diagnosis, I, like many others, was clueless to how far treatment has come. I was still under the belief my diagnosis was a death sentence. Moving forward, even if only one person hears my story, that’s one more person that’s educated and can raise awareness.

I believe it’s time for us as a society to start better education of this disease. The vast majority of the people I’ve spoken to are receptive to the knowledge of my status, and I’ve received lots of support from loved ones, friends, and total strangers. It’s time to beat the stigma.

smallswingshoes

This is slightly off-point, but as for the cost, I wanted to mention that some pharmacies have specialties that let them get special coupons/programs and stuff to save money.

A bottle of Truvada (a month supply commonly used for treating this) is at least $3,000 out of pocket and insurance doesn’t usually take a lot off of that. But the pharmacy I work at is an HIV specialty and we always get te price down to less than $10.

If you’re on HIV meds and they’re ludicrously expensive, ask your local pharmacy manager if there are any local HIV specialty pharmacies that they know of. They might be able to help.

mycroftrh

I think it’s important to emphasize that, while the diagnosis is no longer a death sentence, it is also true that people dying of AIDS because of homophobia is not history only.

My brother’s first boyfriend was kicked out/disowned by his parents for being queer, got AIDS, couldn’t afford treatment, and died. He died in 2019, at around 20 years old.

In 2019.

Barely more than a kid.

Of a treatable disease.

Because of homophobia.

Because his parents cared more about not being associated with a queer person than they cared about their son’s literal life.

AIDS is not just history. Neither is homophobia.

madgastronomer

Back to history: When AIDS patients held die-ins, they went to hospitals, lay down in front of them, and literally waited to die.

specificfuckery

carnivalseb

If you’re young & either queer or queer-adjacent, think about the number of people out of the closet you know your own age & think about how many you know your parents age. They’re not stamping us out of the mould any quicker these days than in the ‘60s, except in lockstep with population growth. I think, growing up, my picture of relative numbers of queer people & straights was unavoidably impacted by the number of empty seats at our table. That might be the case for you too. The number of elders you never got to meet.

Remember this when people talk about how small the LGBTQIA+ population is. That it’s “such a small percentage of the population to be catered too”. Remember this and tell them, “that’s because homophobia killed them”.

purplepints

This picture of the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus is often included with the “The men facing the camera/in white are the surviving members” but it leaves out something extremely important:

By 1996, all of the men facing the camera in the picture were dead.

Every.

Single.

One.

Eric Luse, the photographer, said this in a more recent article :

By 1996 the obituary list was almost 50 names longer than the entire choral roster. All of the positions plus four dozen more, gone. The obituary list continued to grow, too. The cost and availability of any treatments in the mid-late 90s continued to cause more death.

If you were queer in the 80s and 90s, you knew someone who had it and knew people who died from it. Period. I cannot stress the impact this had on the queer community and those of us who were alive at the time, and I know the scope of it is almost unimaginable to younger people today.

By 1996, there were NO surviving original members of the SFGMC. You need to know that when you see this picture.

Dozens of the men turned away from the camera here in this shot were also dead alongside the men in white. It is vital to recognize that.

There is no hope in this picture, it isn’t a display of a lucky few who avoided death. There is no “Well at least some of them survived” because no, they didn’t, and this time was so fucking bleak and painful it’s astonishing that anything got done. They’d march one week and die the next. Their friends would bury them in the morning and march in the afternoon. This went on for years.

Bigotry and hate and ignorance killed generations of queer people. It speaks to the sheer resilience of the community that from that all but state-sanctioned genocide, we have gained so much ground in the last few decades. Much is owed to the people who refused to stay quiet and who fought even on their deathbeds, so please consider learning about LGBTQ+ history as a way of continuing the fight and showing respect. Many of us coming of age at that time didn’t have that opportunity, and made it a point to learn and get involved as teenagers and young adults because we saw what we were losing.

Sing for two.

mg-dl

My fave part of this post is the repeated usage of the word “queer”. In a discussion about the hatred of LGBT people and how they were left to die by the government, it’s always a great idea to call them all a slur. Can you switch it up a bit and use “fag” next time?

star-anise

There’s a really obvious reason why we’re using “queer”.

When talking about LGBTQ+ history, often we have to be really careful with the language we use, because how we understand things now is not how the people we’re talking about understood themselves at the time. We end up using phrases like, “People who we would now understand as gay or lesbian” or “experiences which modern transgender people often identify with”.

In this case? It’s because that’s the word they used.

(Many of them also used the words “fag” or “dyke”, but “queer” is more inclusive.)

When I talk about “the leading lights of queerness” I mean Queer Nation. I mean the people who contributed to Queer Theory. I mean people who deliberately chose to use that word. I mean me and my ex-girlfriend. We exist.

During the AIDS crisis especially, homophobia was so bad that a lot of people didn’t want to be known by any word associated with the gay community: Not gay, not homosexual, not queer, not anything. Epidemiologists had to create the category of “men who have sex with men” because there was literally no existing term that didn’t carry the weight of a slur. The purpose of using the word “queer” was for people to say, “Let’s stop running from the things society is calling us; let’s pick up the weapons they’ve hurled at us and start hurling them back. There is no level of socially acceptable we can be that will make them suddenly decide our lives matter. We’re here, we’re queer, get used to it.” It meant very specifically embracing and defending their/our marginalized position.

Every word we’ve ever been known by has been a slur. We all have our own histories and flinch reactions. I grew up with “gay” and “lezzo” being used really hatefully around me, as well as “queer” and “dyke” and “fag”, and I have different comfort levels with all those different words.

/shrug emoji You can dislike the word all you like and ask that it not be used for you. But historically and today, a lot of us do use it for ourselves, and we constitute “the queer community” or “queerdom”. Which we don’t think is a bad thing. If you don’t want to join us, fine, but that doesn’t make us stop existing, and any other word you can call us would also be a slur, because our community is predicated on saying, “We are that thing you’re so afraid of. Get used to it.”

poztatt

Speaking to the MSM point in the final addition. Functionally a problem in trying to get studies going in the 80s and 90s that tried to figure out what in hell was going on was trying to get people into studies. To answer questions. Because you could lose your job, home, family, life if you incautiously admitted to being gay/queer/homosexual. So among the men who were terrified of being on any kind of record as being gay because they self identified that way there were a whole host of people who didn’t actually see themselves as gay. Because it was just not something they could accept. But what always fascinated me was in the studies we did (I’m out of Vancouver, BC and have been part of an HIV/AIDS research organization since 96, for context) at one point we had a staunch group of individuals who were predominantly immigrants from other cultures who culturally had definitions of behaviour that didn’t align with North American behaviour labels. Insertive partners in some cultures are not gay as they were/are not mechanically different from “the normal male” sexual actor. Receptive partners were. Basically the thinking in some people’s minds is that women=receptive and insertive=male. And if your sex didn’t match the sexual position… Now. To be clear. I’m not saying these things as a point of “this is what I think”. This is what had been captured in interviews and conversations and studies over the years. Some people aligned themselves these ways. I’ve always seen it as part and parcel of the gender issues and misogyny that we’re still, 30 years later, arguing about. As to the rest… I’ve written about this (and lectured and written and lectured and written) before. In this particular thread even. It will never stop amazing me the revisionism that happens around queer. Those of us who were in large protesting crowds, remembering “We’re Here! We’re Queer! Get Over It!” being told “it’s never not been a slur/been used by us” just…wigs me out. What I remember? What I remember is my now husband and then friends (and myself) knowing that the straight culture we lived in equated holding hands with a sexual act. Holding hands in public as queer people was fucking. It was viewed the same. Today that seems ludicrous but it’s how it was. Our being was an act of aggression, of sexual acts, of a political agenda. A spiritual and moral violence. And we knew. Like everyone has known: the fear behind that was potentially a tool we could use. So standing in rooms with scientists and physicians who had decided we were dirty queers with sick fucking lives and minds, prone to acts of perversion and inhumanity? We wore shirts with QUEER in big bold letters so when they talked to us, met our eyes, it was over the words they were whispering in their heads. It was under the leather we wore, the sexualized outfits with no room for misinterpretation about FUCKING. And SEX. And in these meetings discussing policy and funding and science we stood there in our entirety on display, forcing them to look at us in all of this - to see we felt all of it was normal and not something we were ashamed of? How could the idea that sex was enjoyable be a topic of debate that had implications on our fundamental humanity? Apparently people did, and do, think so. This all put us in positions of power in those negotiations. Negotiations, do not ever forget often that were about whether or not their largess would allow us to live. So while people were embarrassed to be confronted with their prejudices that they were comfortable expressing out of sight and hearing of us, we stood and HELD their eyes and their attention. Queer fuckers. Fags and perverts. And we refused to fucking die quietly. (shrug) So to those that dislike the word, outside of the fire of my own history I will calmly discuss it and follow their instructions not to call them queer. But if you step into my history, into the graveyard of the men and women I know who are now gone due to apathy and disinterest and hatred and homophobia… you’re going to hear queer. In great swelling chants from the throats of thousands of people in the streets. You can like it or hate it but you cannot argue it’s existence and the lever it was that shifted the world we’re arguing in the middle of, today.

prismatic-bell

If you want to know how all-encompassing AIDS was of queer culture, I’d like to direct you to RENT—not the movie or modern performances, but the original. Jon Larson was cishet, but he was also writing about his own friends and community.

You will note that literally half the cast has AIDS. If you listen to the original workshop, it’s THREE QUARTERS—Maureen is positive and Mark refuses to get tested out of fear because he’s showing symptoms.

Next: the Life Support scene. First of all, it was based on a real group called Friends In Deed. Second of all, something often omitted but still sometimes honored:

The intention was for the names of the characters to change for every actor, sometimes more than once in a run (literally up to and including “every performance”). That’s why none of the characters’ names are mentioned in the scene except by the actor with that name. Each actor was given the opportunity to name their character after someone they had known who died of AIDS, and the “default” names were all members of Friends In Deed.

So when you listen to that song, remember: every person named in it is dead. Of AIDS. It is entirely possible this is their only memorial. And when you hear a different name, that, too, is in memorial. Of a person who died because the whole world looked away.

I would also advise young members of the community to look up the AIDS memorial quilt. It’s been digitized and can be viewed online. Each panel is 6’x3’, roughly the size of a grave. The quilt weighs 54 tons and is the largest folk art object in the world; in its entirety it requires a space the size of the Mall in Washington, DC to display. (For non-Americans and/or people who are unsure: you know the pictures of presidential inaugurations, or MLK’s I Have A Dream speech? That’s the Washington Mall.)

Every single panel in the quilt represents a dead person. Some represent more than one dead person, because people would make a panel in memoriam and then they, too, would die of AIDS, and there would be nobody left to make a panel for them.

When you turn your back on “queer,” when you turn your back on “weird gays,” when you turn your back on trans people, this is what you are turning your back on. Fifty-four tons of nothing but names of the dead.

And I assure you, the people who hate us enough to have made the quilt necessary? They hate you too. You’re not special just because you’re the “right kind” of LGBTQIA.

punk-n-junk

“Excuse us for not laying the groundwork for children we never thought we’d have in a future none of us thought we’d be alive for.”

soup--champ

Managed to track down a high quality photo of r/place prior to the destruction for those who want it. May it rest in internet history.

willowdove

Can someone explain what this is and why everyone was obsessed with it for a few days because I kept seeing it referenced with no context

beanabina

r/place was an April fool's event put on by Reddit (first in 2017, then again this year in 2022) where a blank canvas opened up on April 1 where users could place one single pixel, once every five minutes. Pixels would overwrite anything placed in that same spot previously, with the canvas constantly changing in flux. Hundreds of communities and hundreds of thousands of people came together to build incredible pixel art, defend their little swaths of territory on the canvas from griefing, form alliances with nearby territory to protect each other's artwork, and hide lots and lots (and I mean lots) of amogus characters.

After 3 days of war, fighting bots, twitch streamers, and griefers, this was the final canvas. On April 4th the only pixel that could be placed was white, and the canvas quickly reverted back to a blank slate, with only screenshots like this to commemorate what hundreds of thousands of people came together to create.

#THE ARGENTINIAN FLAG #proof we're the best country #nunca tan orgullosa de ser argentina