I Swim For Better Days Despite The Absence of Sun

27//Queer//Dancer//Proud Jew and Zionist//Water Enthusiast 📍BOS מים

[starringmeacomplicatedlovestory]

This is so important to me

[likesboys-deactivated20160803]

[femstyles]

Those 5 boys and the community around them held such a strong role in shaping me and knowing one of them is just... no more... I can't explain this feeling.

[starringmeacomplicatedlovestory]

Right now I'm kind of staggering between the different stages of grief. I don't even know how to explain what one direction meant to me as a teen, or where to begin talking about not only how much, but just how they affected me, but if you were a fan back in the early 2010's, or you just followed me or any other 1D stan way back in the day, then you just know. There were times when I was literally only kept living because of one direction. I'm watching old videos and it's absolutely heart breaking with hindsight. RIP Liam 💕🕊

[maleksrami]

i am the person i am today because of the experiences i had stanning 1D in my twenties. those formative years were shaped by the the memories and connections i made, people i met on and offline, the learning and self discovery i endured while loving them, their music, their bond—so much of it was through those boys.

liam was integral to that entire journey and always will be. that chapter in a lot of our lives may or may not have closed, but it is something that will continue to be carried with us as we keep growing older together because there was just nothing else like them. everything about them was so special. despite everything.

i cherish so much about that time in my life, about his contributions to it, his legacy as an artist. it feels like such a massive waste. liam was immensely talented and i only wish he had gotten the help he needed in order for people to keep seeing that. he deserved to get better as much as the people he hurt deserved to speak up.

let this be a lesson to hold onto one another, check on people you love, get help if you know you need it. hold yourself accountable when you mess up. you can start over. you can become a better you. feel everything you need to feel, process this however you need—it’s all valid and warranted. this is very shocking and complicated. it is confusing and heartbreaking.

take care of yourselves.

[the-chosen-half-of-one]

Achievement unlocked: discovered piece of media at exact right time in your life to experience maximum peak emotional impact and infatuation

[unclefather]

Reblog if you’re a true 90s kid and you remember this tumblr

[turnipfritters]

In retrospect it was high key insane that they had the activity feed embedded into your dash board like that

[kedreeva]

It’s why you never wanted a post to escape containment here. It literally made your dashboard unusable for days or longer, obscured by notifications that didn’t even stack. It was wild. I miss it.

[deactivated1053489]

“How is Brendon Urie disbanding a band of one person” simple. Tonight he will finally take the green ribbon that he keeps habitually wrapped around his neck and he’ll undo the bow and unravel it and

[starringmeacomplicatedlovestory]

Hey would any of my followers are under the age of 27, have any connection to Judaism and haven’t been to Israel wanna help me out, can you dm me?

[neurotypicalite]

theres a pink blue and white flower at rhe grocery store i have to make. a joke

[neurotypicalite]

call that a transplant

[starringmeacomplicatedlovestory]

Currently so homesick for Israel. i need to go back asap

[starringmeacomplicatedlovestory]

Wow, we went to the kotel yesterday and it was just. Oh my god. I don’t know how to properly explain it.  I want to remember that moment for the rest of my life. It was overwhelming and emotional but I’m glad I cried. I feel like a part of something so much bigger. At the time I felt emotionless and but couldn’t stop crying and staring at the wall. Once we left I wanted nothing more than to go back. I know at the time I was, I don’t want to say dissociating but I was definitely having some sort of transcendental experience. I LOVE BEING JEWISH. I know one day I’ll return. I could even see myself  making Aliyah one day. Just when we were all singing and praying during havdalah last night I felt such a connection to something so much deeper. Yes this is a Jewish trip but in that moment it was more than an ethnicity and religion, it’s an ancient culture that’s survived against all odds and we are all apart of that no matter our observance or background. I felt so proud to be a part of this. I love the staff’s passion and excitement for sharing Judaism with everyone especially those of us who didn’t grow up with it. I’m definitely going to thank them before the end of this trip. Going to Yad Vashem today and its definitely going t be another emotional day.

[supermoonscarab]

[luxgalador]

my teeth hurt just looking at this. like these made my teeth hurt. not from eating them. just the way they felt.

[starringmeacomplicatedlovestory]

These were never meant for erasing. yiu draw faces on them and name them and they are your pets and they are friends with the ones the 2 kids who sit next to you in your 3rd grade classroom have. you may occassionally trade them but for the most part they are as much your pets as your tamagochi and micropets were. But your teacher couldn't ban them because they technic were school supplies, they were a way for us to cheat the system.

[snoopysfriendwoodstock]

genuinely when you log off and are only exposed to the lives of those around you as god intended you realize how much shit does not matter. i know this is not a hot take but we were not meant to hear every thought, feeling and opinion of people we will never see face to face. it’s so much easier to pile on people for harmless but annoying opinions when you will never have to spend extended time with them.

[changbeens]

forget zodiac signs, forget mbti, the true personality test is, what song is this: na na na

[grox]

Garlic powder & onion powder are literally like two beautiful twin sisters brushing eachothers long hair at the lake by moonlight one last time before they both walk into the forest and kill themselves

[starringmeacomplicatedlovestory]

NO because the funniest shit happened in dance tonight. All class it was piano versions of Encanto Moana and Hamilton. it was a vibe and pretty different than our normal stuff. We get to the end of class and we get ready to mark grand allegro standing in sous-sus our teacher plays the music AND OUT OF NOWHERE WITH NO WARNING ITS FUCKING CATS. NIT JUST CATS BUT THE FUCKING CATS SONG. Me and my friend take a split second to look at each other like ”is this what i think it is” and we collapse in laughter. like all class we’re dancing to lin manuel miranda then we finish with fucking memories. It was the funniest thing i swear to god.