h
Keni
tannertan36
styofa doing anything
DEAR READER
oozey mess
NASA
Monterey Bay Aquarium
sheepfilms
shark vs the universe
Cosimo Galluzzi
titsay
Misplaced Lens Cap
YOU ARE THE REASON
JBB: An Artblog!
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i don't do bad sauce passes
Discoholic 🪩
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Show & Tell
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@stuffmariathinksisfunny
every culture has their ethnic donut and every culture has their ethnic dumpling… humans be frying dough
Every culture also makes a sword. If they got metal they make a sword, if they don’t have metal they take obsidian or shark teeth or whatever it is that they’ve got and they make that into a sword.
Coincidence? I think not.
2 constants in all civilizations:
Tasty Fried Food
Danger Murder Sticks
Imagine going to a party and the white suburban stay at home mom with two overachiever kids and white dad who barbeques but doesn’t know how to barbeque and yet is always surrounded by other white Dads who compliment his barbqeuing even though they’re just store bought preshaped frozen patties from Ralph’s or Food 4 Less and while he’s cooking those the white mom comes out and says “okay kids, here’s some pizza!” And she pulls this out and starts telling the kids why its a “fun pizza” and then cries in her master bedroom when no one likes it or finishes it and the white dad is then consoling her why she sobs that she’s a terrible mother and ruined her fourth grade straight B+ sons birthday and thinks her kids hate her but they don’t care but she continues crying softly into her pillow while the children eat poorly cooked burgers with unmelted kraft singles and too much mayonnaise and the only other condiments are two pickles and pepper because the dad calls it his special burger with a secret spice but the spice was just pepper and the kids just keep playing E rated games on their Nintendo Wii while the 17 year old older sister starts cleaning the tragedy up and throwing away uneaten “fun pizza” and whole burgers dejected from the start while she dials Pizza Hut to get these kids an actual birthday lunch and the mother then throws a fit because the daughter did something the kids liked and she didn’t and was the only one making a huge deal out of it and the daughter was then grounded from her TV in her room for only two days and the son went to blow out the candles in his standard birthday cake from food 4 less the mom added strawberries to so she could feel she did something but was still slightly teary and sad because her day was ruined by no one wanting to eat her “fun pizza”
i mean i’d eat it
that was a wild ride
Sophie Turner by Richard Phibbs | Harper´s Bazaar UK (May 2019)
this man was really just in this public bathroom with his girlfriend on speaker phone and she’s like “what are you up to” he’s like “I’m taking a shit baby” absolutely appalling this might be the last straw for me I really might attack this man
literally I feel like a wild chimpanzee right now
I am abt to lose my fuckin mind because I happened upon this gender reveal party. and like it’s soo over the top expensive
And like I’m like. Oh great, a horse themed gender reveal party.
complete with like … just truly excessive foods and of course, themed cocktails
and this sign which like… the fragility of like *not* italicizing the word ‘colt’. Like imagine being this weird abt gender
with like, a bucket that eventually ‘revealed’ the gender
But like… the picture that really just completely undid me, for this party which surely was more money than many weddings -
it’s not a horse themed gender reveal party. It’s a gender reveal party FOR A HORSE. I can’t even like imagine the life that would lead to hosting a gender reveal party for a not-yet-born horse. Think abt getting an invitation to this. the cis are at it again.
And that there’s that many guests, my god
NEVER has a post thrown me for such a fucking loop before
he really snuck into her window at night and watched her sleep and we all were young and the 2008 recession was going on and we were just like “yeah okay sure”
so many people are reblogging this with “NOT ME I KNEW IT WAS CREEPY KGKSNCKAJX0” congrats bitch but please be advised that this is a twilight blog and I’m talking specifically to the motherfuckers in the trenches
please, I am begging you, PLEASE look at this extremely good image my friend just texted me
Public service announcement: DO NOT attempt to take panoramic photos of your pet. The results are traumatic.
Via Countryside Veterinary Hospital
I’ve met this girl 😂
IM CRYING
if you dont believe in aliens youre fucking stupid
i dont give a damn about roswell or area 51 or whatever the fuck. thats not what i mean. the universe is infinitely large and weve already found living bacteria and stuff on comets. space has some crazy shit. it rains glass on venus and there’s a planet made of solid diamond. jupiter’s great red spot is a billion year old hurricane and like ten million earths could fit inside the sun. who gives a fuck if they arent little green men from mars. aliens exist and if you dont think so youre clowning hard my man
remember this show where this one dude had to guess what is he smelling and he put his nose into someones asshole and went “smells like ass” and the commentator went “correct” and this dude did the funniest expression ever. wheres that gif
my favorite thing about kermit the frog is that sometimes he makes this face
