NCC-1701-D.Va

That's what they came here to do. Stop First Contact.

[sunlightwarden]

I have to stop scrolling here when I'm falling asleep. Thumb slips and suddenly I'm DMing posts to people I've never talked to.

[kosmogrl]

sorry I can’t hang out tonight. yeah I’m busy freaking out over things that might not even happen. yeah it’s gonna take a while

[grenadineghost]

you want to be mommy’s adjective noun, don’t you, pet name? you want to verb and verb for mommy like a good gender

[alhyastarain]

you want to be mommy's weird potato, don't you, Brian? you want to skip and somersault like a good jester

[autogynophelia]

An interesting way of mapping privilege dynamics in a group is keeping track of what happens when two people start speaking at the same time. Not necessarily in the sense of "which of the speakers gives way to the other" (because this can be confounded by autism affecting people's responses to social cues, and also by people making a deliberate attempt to *not* give way as a reaction to their own marginalisation) but in the sense of "which of the speakers draws the attention of the group, and which is ignored".

I think many marginalised people have had the experience of starting to say something, and then seeing everyone's heads turn away to listen to someone "more important". And even if you refuse to give way, and you manage to make the "more important" person back down, you'll notice that when you stop speaking no one will respond to you, but everyone will immediately turn back to that "more important" person as if to say "Sorry, you were saying?"

And, of course, the specific social dynamics of the group will affect these things, like friendship, enmity, sexual and romantic attraction, or if one person is specifically sucking-up to another for some purpose like securing a job offer. But if you pay attention to this over several groups over a long time, you will pick up on patterns that repeat and repeat and repeat.

For example, normally if a man and a woman start talking at the same time, the man will draw the group's attention. And on those occasions where he doesn't, it's generally because there is some other marginalisation involved: race, class, disability, immigration status, sexuality...

But sometimes you will see a situation like this where a man is treated much worse than he "ought" to be, taking all these things into account, and you'll think "Huh, that's weird, what's going on there?". And then a decade later you'll meet that person again and she's a woman now.

[autogynophelia]

An interesting way of mapping privilege dynamics in a group is keeping track of what happens when two people start speaking at the same time. Not necessarily in the sense of "which of the speakers gives way to the other" (because this can be confounded by autism affecting people's responses to social cues, and also by people making a deliberate attempt to *not* give way as a reaction to their own marginalisation) but in the sense of "which of the speakers draws the attention of the group, and which is ignored".

I think many marginalised people have had the experience of starting to say something, and then seeing everyone's heads turn away to listen to someone "more important". And even if you refuse to give way, and you manage to make the "more important" person back down, you'll notice that when you stop speaking no one will respond to you, but everyone will immediately turn back to that "more important" person as if to say "Sorry, you were saying?"

And, of course, the specific social dynamics of the group will affect these things, like friendship, enmity, sexual and romantic attraction, or if one person is specifically sucking-up to another for some purpose like securing a job offer. But if you pay attention to this over several groups over a long time, you will pick up on patterns that repeat and repeat and repeat.

For example, normally if a man and a woman start talking at the same time, the man will draw the group's attention. And on those occasions where he doesn't, it's generally because there is some other marginalisation involved: race, class, disability, immigration status, sexuality...

But sometimes you will see a situation like this where a man is treated much worse than he "ought" to be, taking all these things into account, and you'll think "Huh, that's weird, what's going on there?". And then a decade later you'll meet that person again and she's a woman now.

[ashes2caches]

please make sure your transfem friends don’t get excluded. please listen to their needs.

[transsexual-feminism]

You should do more than just listen, actually. You need to ask her. You need to go up to her and ask her about things you can do to include her. We are taught to take up as little space as possible, you need to go out of your way to account for that.

[adoralucifera]

Some trans women will tell you up front! They'll be the first to get excluded for making a fuss.

PLEASE ask your transfem friends what you can do to help. Maybe she's doing fine, I'm sure one (1) of us is. But it's probably not your friend. And your friend probably wants to exist peacefully, because so much of her life is conflict already. A lot of us learn to shrink to avoid inconveniencing others. To get by with as little as possible because community, affection, care, help? All conditional in ways that are so much thinner than they are for other people within our demographics.

Please help us when you can.

[dragongirlsnout]

10 000 dollars a day to every autistic child who grew up into an adult with a weird relationship to eating because parents can in no way be trusted to respect children's issues with food

[aphel1on]

"character doing a c+ job of breaking the cycle of abuse" is such a crunchy dynamic forever. what if i'm giving my all to give you a better life than i had and i'm succeeding but "better" just isn't quite enough. what if my blind spots and deeply ingrained trauma and inexperience mean that you will be indelibly scarred by me despite my best efforts. what if my abuser's influence still bleeds through at times because i know nothing else. what if i go so far in the opposite direction to avoid it that i hurt you in ways i couldn't have anticipated. what if my undeniable love and unforgivable shortcomings came part and parcel with each other. what if your love and gratitude and resentment and pain came part and parcel too. what if we both knew you deserved better but i was all you had. what if we had to move forward and reckon with that. what then

[wizardshark]

99% of queer discourse stops right before they define the true difference between bisexual and pansexual!

[saspitite]

FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME

BISEXUALS GROW FROM THE GROUND

PANSEXUALS GROW FROM THE CEILING

[k1ntsug1-r0b0t-g1rl]

some days i feel overwhelming grief for the fact that i never got to be a teenaged girl

[k1ntsug1-r0b0t-g1rl]

i should have been an awkward tomboy slowly figuring out she's a lesbain and crushing on my best friend but instead i was crushed into nothing by feelings i couldn't even point to

[k1ntsug1-r0b0t-g1rl]

it's so fucking unfair

[exclipsensfw]

purity politics

(reposting this because tumblr deleted my blog funny enough for nsfw)

[exclipsensfw]

Someone sent me anon hate then reported every single one of my posts because of this post

[despazito]

I don't have time for tumblr discourse they're calling the very hungry caterpillar degenerate art over on twitter

[despazito]

good art is when something looks like real life, the more real it looks the more better the art. abstracted figures give my trad children nightmares, one time they were exposed to cubism and couldn't go outside for a week

[twocubes]

people want doing the right thing to be like pulling the correct lever at the correct time but actually usually doing the right thing is more like holding a moderate weight at arm's length continuously for seventeen years

[twocubes]

every so often since like, March, this post will spike in popularity, and I'll just suddenly know that a few thousand people somewhere are Going Through it for reasons I cannot know in any detail, like I'm some small node in our collective lymbic system that doesn't actually know what to do with the signals it's given. it's interesting.

[femalegrandma]

[catcrumb]

[sociallyunacceptableart4]

This was my art school’s water fountain. Drink from them wolf tiddies

[mando-lore]

Assignment misunderstood. I have now built a city.

[mando-lore]

[mando-lore]

Give it a day

[alexaloraetheris]

[hungry-skeleton]

Fucked up that if you make a minor social blunder you can't ask the person if they hate you forever now because that within itself is another social blunder