can't go home, got my dick stuck in the moon

why must i always get got

[tsuyuzakimahiru-deactivated2020]

[dreamlogic]

asked one of my coworkers how she's doing today and she goes "could be better, could be worse," and another coworker nearby who was eavesdropping chimes in with "could be a lil bit o' alligator curse!" i have no idea what he meant by that but i do know that it has been immediately added to the lexicon.

[snuffteddy]

[samreich]

choose your fighter

[lmaonade]

this is so damn funny

[z3bula]

this gif lives in my head rent free, I just imagine an image of Bad Luck Brian flashing in my head anytime something mildly unfortunate happens to me

[memes4doom]

[tall]

[cybelusreverie]

notice that no one on MTV Cribs has an emergency eyewash station

[earhartsease]

on it boss

[enki2]

[celestiamoved-deactivated201701]

i like boys who dress like icecreams and ignore me for video games and get food all over their face so i can wipe it off and spoon feed and baby them esp when they are mean to me it’s garbage i know but i can’t help it

[illness-deactivated20180325]

boys who dress like ice creams still haunts me. even more than the rest of this which is objectively worse.

[silvaurum]

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

[silvaurum]

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

[silvaurum]

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

[fallout-lou-begas]

Visit Original Link

[snoleopard7]

[cheaphalloweencostume]

all movies are for children because the moving image is inherently juvenile. to be entertained by it even moreso

[scrumptiousangst]

Staring for two hours at a painting doesn't make you deep.

[cheaphalloweencostume]

i can stare for up to 7 hours actually

[paxamericana]

[frailgun]

more women should have the body of a snake imo

[frailgun]

more women should have 4 arms

[pineyw00dsshesquatch]

Best I can do is 6 arms and centipede

[frailgun]

"best I can do is going above and beyond the call of duty"

[kitschke]

i kinda love this response. just try reading my comment in a nicer voice and you'll feel better

[tippyturret]