Good Conversation is my Kink.

Dirty Old Man, 51. Cis (I think) he/him. Into women, non binary people, and occasionally guys. Living in Colorado, waiting to talk to you for the first time. 3 adult children, 7 grandchildren, 6-7 problems. Happily married and also allowed to flirt. My memory is bad. Sketchy. Etch-a-sketchy. Did I already tell you that?

[scrumptiousangst]

My social energy fluctuates wildly, which greaty affects how much I can initiate conversation. BUT I am still thrilled to hear from YOU. Please never hesitate to talk to me again, even if it's been a long time.

[scrumptiousangst]

[thepromiscuousfinger]

[masterxdanx]

[mynaemsophie-deactivated2026031]

reblog to bap prev with your paw

[bakedplushie]

if anyone could throw me $20 that would be very cool <3 we don't get paid until this Friday and i'm out of my preferred pain management medication

CA: $ariotprincess PP: kezzdispenser

thankchew friends :3

[bakedplushie]

could still use help, i go to the store later today

[stella-draws-things]

[scrumptiousangst]

-my grandson grunting when he is upset and nonverbal

[infectiouspiss]

Is it acceptable that I do shave my legs only because it’s easier to put lotion on my legs when they aren’t too hairy and I do like the feeling of smooth skin when I finish up with it.

I also only really do it once or twice a month so sometimes I do go out in public with hairy legs.

come on man i'm on my lunch break can't you wait???

[kallistoi]

[image description: a digital calendar with the events:

weigh the hearts of leg shavers (7-11:30)

lunch break (11:30-12:30)

weigh the hearts again 🙄 (12:30-00:00)

a cursor on the calendar shows the time as 12:02. end description.]

[beardedmrbean]

[chosominous]

[effemimaniac]

I'm so horny I could fuck a person I was attracted to #TRUE

[weantuniverse]

(via Facebook)

[sscreamss]

just because you don’t look like somebody who you think is attractive doesn’t mean you aren’t attractive. flowers are pretty but so are christmas lights and they look nothing alike

[qqchurch]

the Ice War on Europa...

[qqchurch]

[deep-state-partisan]

[somestrangeangels]

[annelidarchive]

the thing about that weird stuff americans call cheese is that if you heat it a little it becomes an excellent burger condiment despite its failings in every other area. such is the fate of the american cultural product

[lootpuppy-deactivated20260205]

the American 'cheese' slice was engineered by our best scientific minds (all borrowed from Germany ofc) to melt perfectly onto a burger and for nothing else. Its only purpose is to compliment the one true product of the American people. The hamburger. (also borrowed from Germany)

[annelidarchive]

reeling a little at the implication that the Kraft Single was a product of operation paperclip

[foone]

in case you were wondering:

American Cheese is a processed cheese made of Cheddar, Colby, or similar, combined with Sodium citrate. The Sodium citrate keeps the cheese fats from separating during the pasteurization process.

The patent for processing American Cheese was granted in 1916 to James L. Kraft, a Canadian of German descent who had immigrated to the US in 1904. Pasteurizing the cheese prevents it from spoiling, allowing it to be shipped farther and stored longer. It was actually WW1 that gave Kraft (and his company) their big break, as the US government provided cheese (in tins) to the armed forces abroad.

So no, Project Paperclip here, although the US Armed Forces and Germans were involved. His ancestors left Germany for Mennonite reasons, not because they were Nazis.

Fun fact: His parents spelled their last name "Krafft". He dropped one of the Fs when he started J.L. Kraft & Bros. Company, which later became Kraft Foods.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Who wants to hear a DIY tiling pro tip that the experts won't tell you

[hazelriver74]

Yes!

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Do not drop your phone into the bucket of tile adhesive. This step is actually completely unnecessary and massively complicates the tiling process.

[fueles]

You say this but my uncle is a tiler and he swears by the “drop phone in putty bucket” technique. I think you’re just posting this for clout

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Your uncle is caught up in a tradition that he was taught as an apprentice that he never questioned. Modern putty doesn't require phone, the formula has changed.

[perfectly-disfigured]

MY uncle says some customers still demand the phone putty technique because it "doesn't look right otherwise"

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Drop an empty phone case in and those customers can't tell the fucking difference because there is no fucking difference.

[lithiumdoll]

My mum renovated houses for thirty years, she says “you’re half right, but in some cases - particularly in houses built before 1930 - the phone does add some benefit. Could be a tablet too if you’ve an old one in the garage. And anyone who says it’s got to be a particular model is just being precious about it, whatever the forums say.”

[00venator]

IPhones and tablets where invented in 1898, what did they do before then?

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Nothing, tiles were invented in 1899.

[thesaltofcarthage]

my sister the historian studied ancient pompeiian tile mosiacs and there's definitely graffiti of dropping cans on strings into the buckets of putty, so it goes way back.

[misanthropemom]

Now, wasn't that more satisfying than just the *sad trombone noise* that you get on other sites?

[fagstaynight]

some people on the internet have only been on here for five minutes

[cowboyspones]

i will never get over this one i’m afraid

[scrumptiousangst]

Merriam Webster was in no way shape or form bought by Elon Musk

Thank you for fact checking my jokes. I look forward to more updates from you. Did that chicken really cross the road or was it just a Chinese psyop?