Having an avoidant attachment makes you avoid connections once they become serious. the serious part makes you feel overwhelmed and unready because it feels too much, while simultaneously wanting the affection and validation given without any 'conditions'.
for people who want to become nonchalant or 'manipulative' or whatever, leaving someone hanging to let them chase may seem like the dream character trait they want to have, but it's a slow social suicide you commit.
as you grow up, you leisurely lose friends who deeply cared for you, you lose chances of true love because you couldn't face your fear of commitment or your low worth about deserving real things, you don't get to face your demons of seeing relationships as a struggle. the painful part is realizing the loss after a very long time, the what ifs and whys they come as sequela.
it's a human nature to care and love, we all have been hurt at some point but it shouldn't teach you to be hurtful or to mimic the facade of being powerful. be human, that's power.
