#baconnaise

[thatpollguy]

Do you like baconnaise?

I love it

I like it

It's okay I guess

I dislike it

I hate it

I've never tried it

I'm allergic/intolerant

Voting ended onNov 28, 2025

[joytraveler]

#36: Planet Of Pisces

"Okay, Pisces Playhouse, let's go- ooh look my character's a COOL DUDE! And I'm a firm believer that having cool sunglasses can help you save the universe, which is why I'm going to wear them this episode"

This game-- unlike any other so far-- has an intro! A blue spaceship soars through a sky full of stars, and inside, a boy with a red fauxhawk peers through the window unsurely as his burly, silver-haired father drives with a smile of confidence.

Syrupentine: Santa And Son!

[My father founded the Pisces project.]

[He created the machines that would convert this barren planet into a new Earth, and left them here.]

The screen switches back to the exterior of their ship, which is now skimming over the surface of a lush, green planet.

CRACK! Suddenly, a silver tentacle grabs the ship right out of the air!

aroseahorseboy: AAH FUCK JUMP SCARE

[They have been waiting for us to come back.]

The Planet Of Pisces logo, a pair of splashing blue fish, appears over the scene, as smoke from the crashed spaceship rises into the sky.

aroseahorseboy: Told you the last one was always the best, Bea

"I can't see anything- OH!" She removes her sunglasses just in time. "Daaang, ok I dunno if anyone ever played Xardion but this is what this makes me think of"

Bee52: cool I hope you get to play a robot cat!

When Bea starts the game, sprites of the father and son are standing outside the wrecked spaceship. The father is speaking.

[I'm going to the CPU to find out what went wrong. I'll be back by nightfall. Glem, you stay here and don't go anywhere!]

He walks off screen and the boy sits down next to the ship-- and the sun sets, the moon comes out, the sun rises again. The boy stands up and puts on those cool sunglasses from the title screen.

[I gotta find Dad!]

aroseahorseboy: it's like the Odyssey, gotta find your father Klickitat_Street: "Glem"???

"Glem! From the game over thing?" Bea tries moving around. "I think I've heard of you and uh, it's nice to meet you in person! I dunno, should I tell him?"

DueyDecimal: i thought that was just a glitch! Maybe it comes from this game?

The game begins-- Glem can run and jump, and he's armed with a blue frisbee(?). But this frisbee returns to him like a yo-yo, bounces off walls and ricochets, and if Bea times it right, he can fly on it like a hover board!

"You can't tell but the control is tight, but you can see the sprite animations in this look better, some of these games have been good but I'm already feeling like this one's gonna be special"

This game is DEEP, with every stage introducing a new mechanic that becomes part of your repertoire of moves-- soon Glem is sledding down spikes with his Discus (as it turns out to be called) serving as a sled, pulling off amazing ricochet shots that bring hovering bad guys down to use as stepping stones, and more!

When Bea pauses for a snack, even the pause screen shows a map of the world, and an enemy encyclopedia! The most common enemy in this game is a bat-winged frog creature called a Hopteran, which can fly, swim, or (true to its name) hop; the most frustrating one is the Angul, which appears to be a winged angel made of glowing neon, and always appears to hunt Glem down at seemingly the worst times!

HNV: God, this game reminds me of the first time I ever played Super Mario 3. aroseahorseboy: its more like dkc but yeah! Max_Force: I'm going to be a dad in eight weeks, you guys... I hope there are still games like this when my daughter gets old enough to play.

Bea has been quiet, as she gets when she gets really into a game. "If you're out there, Mr. Or Ms. Joy Traveler development person, please just let me know who you are so I can credit you somehow because this is a gem hidden in a pile of.. Uh well its the best looking game so far lets keep it at that!"

By the time she gets to the last boss-- four and a half hours later-- the adventure has taken her from rolling green hills, to a parched desert, to dripping, foggy cliffs, and finally into this wild technological slime mold explosion, where the machines sprout up from the ground and attack, monitors spontaneously grow out of the walls and blare warnings, and her old friend Angul could be waiting around any corner. She's fought robots, biological hazards, and even what looked like a giant blob of blood gelatin-- but the end of Planet of Pisces is near.

"Okay so this has gone way, WAY overtime but I think I'm near the end here folks, at least I hope so. I would almost say that if you ever find one of these systems, it's almost worth getting just for this one"

aroseahorseboy: hands up if you ordered one while you were watching those! Bee52: me berd_snurglar: you can order these??? Syrupentine: I hope Glem's dad is OK. :( aroseahorseboy: I hope he's not the final boss Bee52: bite your tongue!!!

"Look, I'm not proud of the way I got this, okay? I had to pry it out of the cold dead hands of a little orphan girl and then I had to suck a whole lot of di- I got it off eBay for like 30 bucks. He said he played a few games and decided it sucked. So if you're out there, hit me up for uh, a free t-shirt"

Syrupentine: I'm a Little dead orphan girl, where's my free T-shirt HNV: Dead T-shirt contest, wooooo

"I dunno guys I feel like the dad usually dies in things like these but we'll see, hang on time, gonna farm these spidery things for health real quick and then it's on to the boss..."

She stands before the boss door, readying herself for anything.

Behind the final door is... what looks like a garage, filled with those robots that were attacking, except now they're building a spaceship identical to the one that you came here in. Directing them is – Glem's dad!

"Sure, sure, just do this to me, thats fine. You called it, AroSeahorseBoy. This is gonna be like a Wily fight but really sad isn't it!"

aroseahorseboy: aw, I didn't have to bite my tongue Syrupentine: Aro is so smart, S-M-R-T

Dad sees him and jumps down from the balcony he's on. ["Glem! I told you to stay where you were!"] He takes one step forward and freezes. All the robots stop and look at him. ["YOU CAN NEVER JUST DO AS YOU'RE TOLD."] Dad suddenly rises into the air-- and begins to glow as he changes. He's a Angul! And from the looks of things, the king of them all!

"OK THIS IS WORSE THAN I THOUGHT" shouts Bea while frantically dodging attacks. Of course this is the kind of boss you have to learn the attack patterns of, no matter how much you've powered up. In the end it's come down to raw skill.

"Dad why?? Were you one of them all along? Or not? Or am I, Glem, also an Angul?? Should I try to focus on not dying instead of theorizing right now, OW there goes a third of my health"

The worst part is, no matter what you throw at him, Dad isn't taking ANY damage! In fact, the only thing that makes him pause, as far as you can tell-- is when you accidentally destroy one of the robot drones that's busily building the ship in the background. That makes Dad MAD.

aroseahorseboy: it's a meta boss, great THAT means he has another form berd_snurglar: Aro stop trying to be smart, we already believe you

"Hey daaad, I'm messing up all your cool expensive robots! MMph, yeah, I'm gonna spray paint bad words all over your cool space ship, too!" She takes out another worker bot. "You spat all over my dream of being a world champion CD thrower and now you're gonna pay for it!"

The robots do rebuild themselves after a short time, but when she knocks them all out at once, the fight changes. Dad lands-- and seems to deflate, all the neon and metal flying away and entering the ship!

Dad stands up, looking weak. ["Glem... It's the CPU. It--he--wants to get back to Earth!"]

The ship shudders and begins to collapse-- no, it's changing. The worker robots are reabsorbed as it changes and expands, becoming... What exactly? Ah, of course-- a giant mechanical dragon.

HNV: DUDE TaichoSenseiKun: I want one!

"ME TOO!" Bea's so impressed with the design she barely jumps over the huge, electrified fireball headed her way, the first of many! "Aaaaaah jeez welcome to BULLET HELL, I see! Fuckfuckfuck, string of obscenities!!!"

This takes all her skills and she has to invent some new ones! She can use the snowboard technique to surf over those electric balls, but it's still a bear getting him down, because only one of his heads is vulnerable at any time, and he may have as many as five!

"Aright if you do the ricochet throw it's a little easier to hit him, but you have to get it pixel perfect! And so Herculass (that's me) vanquishes the mighty hydra, at the expense of her damn thumbs but I do if for you guys!" She slips between a rain of laser fire, every move counts and she's gotta think fast, but as the boss starts to flash red, it seems the end may be nigh.

NormalNancy: YOU GOT THIS BEA YOU GOT IT Syrupentine: Iwata-san, lend Bea your power from heaven

"Dude too soon. Ugh doesn't matter its ALWAYS gonna be too soon"

Syrupentine: I was sincere. :(

Whether through her own skill or divine intervention... It works! BOOOM, down goes the dragon in a shower of bubbly explosions, all three heads twisting and screaming!

NormalNancy: YOU DID IT MaxForce: Planet of FUCK YEAH! berd_snurglar: how you gonna get home now, there went your ship

"Am I done? I'm just.. I can't.." Suddenly it all catches up with Bea, she hasn't been this into a game in a while! "I'd give a big victory scream but I don't think I have in meOOOOOOOOOOH IN YOUR FACES, ALL FIVE OF THEM ASSHOLE!"

Glem's father comes up-- it's strange, how strong and burly he looked at the beginning of the game, and how Glem seems to tower over him now.

["You've actually beaten 6R316-UE... Son, I don't know what to say!"] The wreckage of the dragon rumbles. ["CALL ME BY MY NAME... DAD."]

Suddenly the same neon and metal cloud rises from the dragon's heap-- and flies right into Glem!

"Aww.. Maybe his dad really just wanted to- OH NO!"

["Glem! No!"]

As Glem falls to the ground, his father grabs the Discus and tosses it into the air-- where it becomes another cloud and pursues the first into Glem!

"I... I don't know whats happening? Did I do something wrong? Is there more??" She tries tapping the buttons lightly, bracing herself for another boss fight

A new stage starts-- and it's not like any other stage in the game. It's sort of like Tron and sort of like Bomberman; a high-speed chase through Glem's own brain, where you have to use the blue bombs to block off the silver dragon-headed tapeworms and force them to destroy themselves!

DueyDecimal: TAPEWORMS! In this game?? berd_snurglar: it's more likely than you think

"WHAT IS HAPPENING WHERE ARE WE WHY ARE WE WHAT ARE WE DOING?!" Bea says, desperately trying to adapt to the new play style! Suddenly the old rules don't apply! "I'm developing an abusive relationship with this device, in that I think its amazing and wonderful and wants to make me suffer"

Every time she lands a hit on one of the dragons, a text box appears, and some of the dialogue seems a bit familiar.

[MY NAME IS NOT 6R316-UE.] [MY NAME IS GREIGUE.] [BUT IT COULD JUST AS WELL BE GLEM.] [OUR FATHER NEVER NEED KNOW WHO WON THIS BATTLE.][ONE SON IS AS GOOD AS ANOTHER TO HIM...]

"Bomb, bomb, evade, EVADE- ffff!! Wait, no, good, I think I got two at once that time?!" Bea's weary but not beaten. She can't be beaten now, she's come too far! "Get out of my HEAD, Greeg! I'm so pissed I'm not even gonna try getting your name right"

Syrupentine: Greigue? Someone's been playing Earthbound Zero... berd_snurglar: wait seriously the terrible monster we've been working our way toward is called 'greg'? aroseahorseboy: it's either that or "Greg-Ooh" DueyDecimal: Gregory the Terrible Eater! aroseahorseboy: if I didn't know that was a book about cartoon goats, that would sound like eldritch horror

Bea is visibly dozing off as she battle rages on, somehow just barely mashing buttons well enough to stay alive, even if she wanders aimlessly into a corner now and then. "s'gonna be over soon. I can feel it, I will persist, and so on, die already"

NormalNancy: BEA WAKE UP YOUR WINNING MaxForce: This is really creepy! aroseahorseboy: one more one more don't choke

"You guys are gonna have better luck piecing together what's happening than I am, I am- I'm almost dead now" she's down to one health pip!

Finally, there's only one dragon head left, chasing Bea's glowing avatar (Glem's soul?) through the maze faster than ever. All it takes is one well-placed bomb, that spins the walls around and captures the dragon in a cube, making it spin faster and faster and finally swallow its own tail!

[NO! NO! I WAS FINALLY! SO! CLOOOSE!]

[JOYRIDERRRRRR!]

The whole screen erupts in digital explosions, and fades back to the workshop, where Glem's father is holding his son, head in his lap.

NormalNancy: YESSS NormalNancy: Way to go Bea! Bee52: wait, joyrider? Wtf?

Bea actually slumps out of her chair for comic effect, but then falls on the floor for real. (THUD)

"OW! Shhh... I'm fine, just.. Not gonna do that again" (at least she's awake!)

The story plays out on the screen as Glem's eyes flicker open, his father hugging him tightly.

[I should have trusted you. You haven't just saved me-- you saved this world I built for us.]

[I've recovered control from 6R316-UE. The machines can rebuild the ship for me in just a few hours. What do you want to do?]

Now the game presents Bea with a final choice:

<I want to go home to Earth.> <I want to live here.>

HNV: it's a trap Klickitat_Street: I don't feel like we got enough input which would be the correct choice. aroseahorseboy: don't give up on earth! Syrupentine: No, stay, you put so much of yourself in this planet NormalNancy: KILL ME NOWWWW

"We know they were going away from the earth, we don't know why though! Is it bad? Do we really want to stay here and chance it with the crazy machines? Uugh.. I dunno."

"Whatever, doesn't matter what I choose, I can always come back and see the other one, can't I?"

"She said, tempting fate"

"Know what? somebody's gotta keep an eye on this place or things just go cray cray so.. all right, dad. We'll stay here, together. And have a cool robot family! I hope. Do you think we could rebuild Greg and make him nice? I feel kind of bad for him"

[I want to stay here.] [After all I've put you through here, you want to stay?] His dad hugs him tight. [The ship launches in three hours... But we won't be on it.]

The scene cuts to Glem and his dad watching the ship sail into the sky... And fades to black.

The torn and tarnished landscape reappears, and the cast roll begins-- all the monsters and meanies Glem fought pass by and are named, from Hopteran to Angul and even some Bea missed (what in the world was Wuggykins?). As the cast rolls by, the landscape slowly heals, going from brown and parched to green and welcoming, and crops and buildings start to appear. Even the sky goes from yellow to blue.

Syrupentine: Awww aroseahorseboy: Bea you totally made the right choice

"I sure hope so. I have a lot of questions but, all's well that ends well, I guess!" She leans back in her chair as she watches, a smile creeping over her face. "This is the kind of game I didn't WANT to end, in a way. This deserves a sequel!"

Finally the five faces of 6R316-UE appear, and cackle cruelly as the characters in its name change one by one to GREIGUE.

The faces disappear one by one, as do the letters... And when the word says GRE_G__, the dragon face looks sad as it disappears.

Llord_Kuruku: nickname Greg confirmed Bee52: Poor mecha dragon

"Thanks, rub it in, game" says Bea with a frown

Then a speck appears in the sky. The ship has returned! We fade back in on Glem and his dad as they watch it land...and out comes the whole family.

Names appear over everyone as they run out and hug Glem and his dad: RIKEL, a tiny little girl who falls flat on her face as she runs for Daddy's arms. ZORK and MARG, twin boys who grab each other and start wrestling before they can even join the family group. RENK, a boy who looks close to Glem's age who runs out to hug him first. And finally out comes...

Syrupentine: REDMOM!!! Klickitat_Street: I knew we were calling her Mom for a reason!

Bea screams! "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Sorry it's just, there she is! And the kids! So, everything was leading up to this game?? And the kids, too! Even if she named them weird!"

"I mean we shouldn't assume but she always did look like the mom type. Mom type Pokémon"

Redmom runs up to her husband and they embrace as their names appear: JOYRIDER and JAYWALKER.

Baconnaise: apparently weird-ass names are a family tradition??? aroseahorseboy: the computer knew Glem's mom??????

She sees the names. "Nnnnnnnng, 'Jaywalker'" she massages her temples.

HNV: Luke Jaywalker

"Ok, so, at least some of these are our mascot characters? I know two are, some of the kids have appeared in game, I know the twins from Beware! Kitchen, I don't think I've seen the others? This is adorable though, you don't usually get a game starring a whole family.. Or a series of games I s'pose"

DueyDecimal: A whole family of mascots reminds me of Doki Doki Panic! And Legacy of the Wizard if anyone remembers that!

The words The End appear in the sky as the family embraces in their new home, and the screen fades to black... But before it restarts, the sad dragon face appears once more with a message:

[IF ONLY ANY STORY COULD TRULY END SO HAPPILY.]

NormalNancy: whaaat DueyDecimal: Oh God this had better not have all been a dream!

But it doesn't seem to be-- Bea is returned to the title screen after a few tense moments.

"Man here it comes! I knew there was gonna be some bullsh- oh"

Bea looks into the camera. "SEQUEL HOOK!"

Bee_52: is there a Joy Traveler 168, please say yes Llord_Kuruku: just skip ahead to Planet of Pisces 2! aroseahorseboy: does ANYONE have a ROM for this???

"Wait, there IS a sequel? I musta just glossed over it, I couldn't have known! And I don't think there's a rom, I don't even know if there's another Joy Traveler of THIS model in existence!"

MaxForce: the one I bought was just Joy Traveler 67, it has 100 less games. :( aroseahorseboy: does it have POP though?? MaxForce: dunno, I ordered it an hour ago!

"You did whatnow??" "I mean cool but, I didn't know you could!"

MaxForce: yeah Bea! If it's got different games I might do my own LP of it and if not, AWESOME

"It could have totally different stuff but I hope you get to play this, the world must know! Now I need to recover a little so, gonna end the stream now, it's been a hell of a ride. Thanks for joining, my bees! Til next time, your queen bids you adieu!"

She doesn't turn it off right away, though. She lingers, thinking over some of the things she's seen. Is it more than just a bunch of recurring characters that show up through these games? There has to be more to their story, but maybe for another time.

[wikipediaoutofcontext]

The event featured a costumed fight between mayonnaise and a slab of bacon.

[joytraveler]

33. Sewer Adventure

Strangely this game doesn't have the same name that was listed on the menu screen: the title screen calls the game "Water Way." It also shows a little plumber character who is distinguished by his lighted miner's helmet, plaid shirt, and chinstrap beard with no mustache.

DueyDecimal: A plumber with no stache? Isn't that a violation of some rule?

"I love sewers, I was born in one! See I was a bee that drank some ooze, but, well you know that story. Hey, yeah, maybe he's gotta earn his plumber 'stache. You can't grow that, gotta earn it through battle"

berd_snurglar: true its a whole nother level of stache Llord_Kuruku: An Amish beard is LIKE a mustache HNV: C. Everett Poop

The game starts on the surface, with nowhere to go but down a manhole. This turns out to be the object of the game: go down. Each screen has a number of valves that must be turned on or off, and once the water pressure is restored, a new doorway opens. Some puzzles even require backtracking to change the flow in previous rooms!

Klickitat_Street: Oh, God. The whole game is a Water Temple! SugaGlyda: Or like that one SCP with all the rooms and it just keeps makin' them rooms

"This is kind of cool but jeez, plumbing is complicated! Who'da knew it?"

The fifth room complicates things even more-- the lights are out and Bea needs to find the switch. Luckily it's just a short walk away... but when the lights come on, the MONSTER wakes up!

aroseahorseboy: EYEBALL MAN

"OHHHHHGGGGGGFFFFFF I HATE YOU!! Jesus that scared the fuck out of me! I am out of fuck, thank to this thing!" time to flee from the horrid thing, trying to get from valve to valve

"I knew Sewer Adventure sounded creepy but they lulled us into a false sense of security!"

HNV: Geez, it's like the incarnation of "eyes peering menacingly out of the dark" Glockroach: Yeah sorry i took a big shit earlier that's probably it ate a lot of eyes Syrupentine: Maybe it goes back to sleep when you turn off the light?

"Let's try it out because it's fast and bad and I don't like it"

"Hehe they got a little remains of another plumber on the ground there, that's cute, HELP!!" She searches rabidly for the light switch!

When the lights flick off, all those eyes get heavy, and close one by one. That's the secret! But when the plumber's night light gets too close, they start to drift open again... which is why it's a good thing Bea just figured out how to turn her OWN light on and off.

"Well this is a survival horror now, I kind of dig it actually but I also am easily horrified as you just saw" She slinks away quickly, better get out of here before she wakes it up again

aroseahorseboy: i see where this is going now... it's gonna get darker and scarier as we go on, isn't it darker... and lonelier... and quieter... and BOO!

"Aro stop I'm afraid!"

Baconnaise: the eyes will get you bea. they'll get their gross eye gook allll over you

The next screen down is also dark to start with, but there are two much smaller monsters sleeping on the lower level, with only two or three eyes each... until Bea turns the light on, and it turns out it's just one WIDE monster with two clumps of eyes!

HNV: GLEM DIED again. What the hell does that even mean?

[selbstgemacht-derfoodblog]

Baconnaise – die beste Bacon Mayo

Baconnaise: Das ist cremige Mayonnaise mit knusprigem Bacon und vollem Raucharoma. Der Star bei eurem nächsten BBQ. Probiert es aus!

Die Baconnaise ist der Star unter den Dips. Aber was ist eigentlich eine Baconnaise? Eine Mayonnaise mit knusprigem Bacon – so wird sie cremig, würzig und leicht rauchig. Perfekt zu Burgern, Sandwiches und eurem nächsten Grillabend! Probiert unser Baconnaise Rezept unbedingt aus!

[cologneswift]

Sad

@taylorswift

[joytraveler]

"......." Bea takes a little shot of honey bourbon before this one. "LLLGRrkk... wow, that's horrible. Okay, we're doing this. A lot of you weren't here for BB but it was.. yeah, y'know, weird and kind of threatening. At first! But the next time we met, I think we made friends!"

Baconnaise: Hellbaby thinks Bea is mum TaichouSenseiKun: We'll make it a new mom, with ParentBuilder 2 DueyDecimal: Is that a game on this too? TaichouSenseiKun: Not yet but we rule nothing out anymore


#72: BOX BABY 3

This game has a graphical change from the first two. The wrapped gift is now on the left side on the screen with the 'astronaut' on the right. The 'astronaut' is also wearing a blue suit rather than the original yellow. Also, the dialogue is in capital and lowercase letters, rather than all caps.

[Hello there.] [I know you can hear me.] [I know you can understand me.] [...] [I also know you don't like me.]

"Who told you that?" She frowns. "I mean, we got off to a rough start. Are you feeling okay there? ...Bea Talks At Games, The Show.."

HNV: Hey, at least you're not as bipolar as the box.

[...] [I'm right, aren't I?] [It's okay to say so. (Y/N)]

"No no no, don't be that way, we's cool! Right? Give Beas a chance?" [N], hoping it means no i don't dislike you and not no i don't like you..

>aroseahorseboy has entered the chat. aroseahorseboy: we're cool i'm sorry i made drama there guys. Klickitat_Street: Uh, she meant the game? But we're glad you're OK now.

"Heya seahawse, we're talking to BB again! Let's all BEE on our best behavior!"

HNV: I told Aro we were playing BB3 and he perked right up

[Come on, let's be honest with each other.] [I know I'm not the one you want to talk to.] [...I haven't seen her lately.] [That was going to be your next question, right? (Y/N)]

"Her? Who her, Redhead Mom? No.." [N] "Haven't seen her in a while, actually, but you must know each other, right?"

TaichouSenseiKun: Are we sure this is box baby we're talking to pigbarrel: Of course, it's the same beeping noise as it types out its text as last time. that's like the voice of a game character that doesn't talk aroseahorseboy: no no guys i figured it out WE ARE THE BOX Glockroach: you're a idiot, get out pigbarrel: we are each a dot on the box.. a speck in this great universe...... Baconnaise: This planet of Meat

[She hasn't come back yet.] [...] [It's you and me now, you know.] [Whether you like it or not.] HNV: Whoever's talking, they don't have as many questions this time

"I think someone switched boxes on us between games here. Get a box that isn't full of Jerk, please"

"Maybe it's the Monsters Inc. HazMat guy on the side there, what's your deal? I like the blue actually, you look less like a Neptunian"

[I like you. ] [No, really!] [Well, I like you better than the others do]. [They're afraid of you, aren't they? (Y/N)]

Bea makes the scariest face she can into the camera. "WELL?? ARE YOU???" she hisses

aroseahorseboy: aaaagh cringe HNV: I fear and respect the B-box Bee52: the Bea box! Glockroach: Bea-elzebib *bub TaichouSenseiKun: that's the bib she wears as she eats your soul

"Yeah gonna go with No on that one"

[You're not fooling anyone. You know they are.] [Because they know what you can do.] [Especially the big one.] [He's the one who wants to change you.] [Me?] [I'm the one who wants to be your friend.]

Llord_Kuruku: yeah, that's me, I'm The Big One

"Maybe the box has six personalities, one for each side, depending how it got flipped over that day.. I wanna be friends too but you gotta be good, okay?"

DueyDecimal: Cool, the box is like the Dodecahedron from The Phantom Tollbooth (a book you should all read)!

[...] [Her?] [Well, what about her?] [Don't you think that if she wanted to see you...] [She'd have come by now? ]

HNV: Wow, the game is as curious where Joyce went as we are

"Start talkin', Boxy. Tell me what you know and I won't let the dog have you"

[...] [You see what I mean.] [I'm the one who can protect you from him.] [I'm the one who's taken her place for you.] [...] [I'm the one who decides whether or not to let you out.]

TaichouSenseiKun: Again, who's talking here aroseahorseboy: kinda wish I was wrong but I called it

"Yeah and who's "him"? Did you do something with my horrible scary square child??"

[...] [No, I'm not kidding.] [Don't try to tell me you'd given up on that.] (Y/N)

"No, not giving up but.. I dunno, am I the bad guy here? What's happening? If that's true why am I a weird jerk.." she frowns.

[I thought not.] [Do you want me to let you out?] (Y)

There's no "no" option for that one.

"That would be nice, please.. " she says quietly as the horror washes over her. "Watch, I'm gonna Game Over myself in a second here"

HNV: Maybe there'll be a new death animation at least?

[Good.] [But it's not just that simple.] [I know what you can do for me in return.] [Do you remember what you told her you'd do for her?] (Y/N)

aroseahorseboy: is there going to be a quiz? DueyDecimal: I remember! A computer the size of a sesame seed!

"Ulp... yyyeah? I am a Bea of my word, even if it gets me in trouble.. I'm not gonna betray Joyce though, I can't do that!" [Y]

[Don't sound so surprised-- we were recording everything.] [That's what I want, you see; the things you promised her.] [All of them.] [Can you make me rich beyond my wildest dreams?] (Y/N)

"Sure, you can be my treasury secretary. No, I don't think I can do that but what the heck do I say??"

Glockroach: Bilk 'em for everything they got DueyDecimal: That was something the box offered Joyce before, do you think it was lying?

Bea is still weirded out and confused, but her fingers eventually find their way to [Y]

Syrupentine: (COVERS EYES)

"I don't know if I can afford to say no..." She grits her teeth and awaits the worst! Looks like that was the correct answer, though, there's no Game Over message.

[That computer the size of a poppyseed-- can you make that for me?]

"If I can't I'm sure we can figure it out! Any tech geniuses in here? Anyone? Duey?"

DueyDecimal: Iiii'm afraid I'm more of the sociological kind of genius... but saying yes seems to be your best bet?

[Real friends, you can get me those? The ones who won't abandon either of us.] (Y/ N)

"Sure can, on today's episode of Bea Lies Her Ass Off! Well, maybe I can get them to join my fandom!" [Y]

Box_Baby_420: You know i love you Bea

[Can you change ME, though? Make me handsome? Tall, even?] (Y/N)

HNV: UH-oh, someone has short man's disease and needs a Box Baby Aspirin

"I think we have a rack somewhere, we can stretch you out Gonzo style. Handsome, can't help you there. Have you tried not being a giant creep yet?"

[You said you could make her famous, too. I don't want that, though.] [Can you make me unfindable?] (Y/N)

Syrupentine: Yes, blue creep, disappear

"Sure, like I said, join the beehive! Then nobody will want to talk to you!" [Y]

DueyDecimal: ...Ouch, Bea. :S

"I"m sorry you know I love you guys more than anything, honest"

[And I mean untraceable.] [Invisible.] [Well, not literally invisible. You know what I mean.] [Of course you do. You understand idioms.] [You know she's not really your mother, for example.]

"Oh I forgot for a while, I thought I had been birthed from a video game! Er, no offense."

pigbarrel: bea you can't have two moms, don't be a mom-hog

"Like hell I can't, this is America!!"

[...No, you're not a real baby.] [We never feed you. You never sleep or laugh or cry.] [...] [Oh? ] [And what do you look like when you cry?] [Do you want to see what you really look like?] (Y/N)

Klickitat_Street: .......I am curious.

"I'm not, can we stop? We got more pages we can play!" She finally hits Y after the room starts getting impatient. "We are going to be a beautiful child, and don't try to convince me otherwise!"

aroseahorseboy: box needs a mom. everyone needs a mom. glem needed his mom too. Glockroach: Dammit seahorse, my old wounds Baconnaise: He's right, though aroseahorseboy: i'm aromantic but that doesn't cover moms

[Do you want to see her again?] (Y) [There isn't a 'No' option for this question.] [Are you going to give me the things I asked for?] (Y/N)

"I think you're going go be disappointed, but, you've got it, dinglenuts. If you did anything to Joyce or.. Royn or Crom or any of the others, I will hack you so fast"

HNV: do we have the chance to jump out of the box and grab this guy's mask off?

"I know how to hack. You dopple down into the mainframe, then defeat the enemy core"

Baconnaise: There's usually a dungeon involved

[Don't forget who did this for you.] [It wasn't her. It was me.]

The lid of the box opens, and the screen fades to black.

Syrupentine: Can I look now? aroseahorseboy: ...ominous

"SO! How we holdin' up, I'm great, no prpbleems wif meee nop." Bea has melted down into her chair a bit.

aroseahorseboy: maybe i don't feel better yet but you don't look good either Syrupentine: You're amazing, Bea, I couldn't handle something like that game HNV: Seriously, I can't believe we're almost half done! It felt like this took a year!

"Yeah HNV, and these are getting intense, right?? I feel like I had an actual baby."

Baconnaise: Bea, no, you have no idea aroseahorseboy: and you don't even get a baby as a reward actually maybe your reward is that you don't have to have a baby

"We better at least get to meet Boxy in person after all this! I'm really kind of worried about them now, anyone else?"

Glockroach: Kid owes you a good whuppin' for setting him up with that freako

"We don't even know for sure what that was! Coulda been another box, another baby, another, eviler mom"

DueyDecimal: So! Does anyone want to hear my theory on Box Baby's true identity? Because here it comes! TaichouSenseiKun: It was me, sorry I'd been meaning to tell you aroseahorseboy: what did you see in the box??? TaichouSenseiKun: Dark HNV: How dramatic DueyDecimal: I think what's in the box is the Joy Traveler itself! It's telling us its own story! DueyDecimal: Yes, I have absolutely NO evidence for this and am completely pulling it out of my ass, but I stand by it!

"It did come in a box. It COULD make someone's dreams come true, provided they're game related. We've seen the tools ourselves!"

aroseahorseboy: oh shit yeaaah! Klickitat_Street: Bea, were you going to do a stream where you play with the game maker more?

"I"m going to dedicate a whole stream to that somewhere down the line, maybe sooner than later. We could use the unwind, and yet we all want to keep going, don't we"

Syrupentine: Do we get a preview of screen 7? Or are you keeping us in suspense all week...

"Hey how do you keep a bunch of nerds in suspense?" She gets up and goes off for a glass of water!

"Okay, sorry, sorry, here we go"

HNV: BEA YOU MONSTER aroseahorseboy: just for that i'm naming my baby after duey instead

Screen 7 shows an image of a car driving down a long driveway to a house; the car has a big JUST MARRIED message written on it, and cans tied to the bumper like in the cartoons!

"What?? JOY in Joy Traveler, what's happening here??"

pigbarrel: soon they'll change it to "just buried"

The menu shown in the sky shows 12 more games:

73. Felinja

74. Super Water Polo

75. Kwaseed

76. Foot War

77. Party On, Planet of Pisces

78. Insecticide

79. Death Master II: The Lord Of Death

80. Freak Show Starring The Hero

81. Run The Gauntlet

82. Imagination: The Game

83. Box Baby World

84. Make Your Promise

DueyDecimal: Finally, they made a game about your imagination! Llord_Kuruku: wait, is that like the prequel to Keep Your Promise?

[joytraveler]

#67: BoBo Town

A platforming game with automatic scroll. The player is a short guy with a big top hat, riding an emu at breakneck speed! Bea soon found she could jump, dash like a drill, and flutter for an extra long jump. It's a lot like the various 'endless runners' you can play on your phone these days, but each level does have a goal, indicated on the map at the top of the screen.

The peanut gallery is still rather quiet.

"EMU!" She shouts and points excitedly. "I like that large scary birds are a thing in this collection! Fu- okay, but you need lightning fast, you don't have much time to react! Stupid.. freakin'..GRAHHH!!"

"Guys please say something.. anything? Come on, its emu racing!"

Baconnaise: Why is it called Bobo Town HNV: Is this intended to be ironic? Haha, look, cute emus! Never mind the MURDERED CHILD. Klickitat_Street: Maybe this is like the cute predecessor to Cassowary Attack and then they got all edgy

After a lot of frustrating trial and error, Bea reaches the boss of the stage: a masked bandit in a cowboy hat, riding an ostrich! Now it does become an endless runner, as you have to keep running until you can drill it into submission

TaichouSenseiKun: This is what Glem would have wanted, I think. To go to the emu races for him Syrupentine: ...he did say he was going to a carnival or something, so... huh.

"The ostrich! My natural enemy and rival! YES, RUN FROM ME! Throw fewer bombs but run from me!"

After about five drills to the rear end, the ostrich throws its rider and runs away! The little guy on the emu's back catches him and ties him up, and there's a little cinematic of taking him to the Bobotown Jail and tossing him in. Apparently your player character is the mayor of Bobotown, and the emu himself is Bobo!

"Okay I have to say, I think they should just elect Bobo himself and cut out the middleman, but whatever, great little game!" She spins her chair around in celebration. "Right? ..You're not worshipping me enough, are you guys still sad about Glem??"

She sinks back into her chair slowly. "Yeah me too.."

HNV: We made Bea sad... I belong in Hell! Glockroach: Damn right you do DueyDecimal: You're right, we gotta be strong for Bea! She counts on us to get her through the hard games!

Syrupentine: It was just really hard, you know, we really loved Glem's first game and it seems like... what was that even about? They killed him off?? HNV: I never saw that in a game before, usually if you have a really good game you kill it with sequels! berd_snurglar: maybe its just to show we live in a random chaotic world, and video games are just a big waste of time Glockroach: Gee thanks berd, maybe we can not enjoy things together later

aroseahorseboy: sorry im quiet. just really hurt. ill come back for the next one maybe. >aroseahorseboy has left. Syrupentine: ...Aro left? Aro never leaves!! Baconnaise: Bea find the man game and someone hug aro when they can for me

HNV: I'll talk to him on discord Nobody else leave okay? Stick with Bea! Klickitat_Street: Yeah, look how far we've come! I can't believe we're almost half done with this! DueyDecimal: And there's another Box Baby coming up!