Something I think gets deliberately misunderstood in SJM fandom discourse is this: when someone points out that Character A behaves just as badly (or worse) than the Character B you’re criticizing, it’s not an attempt to make you like A.
In the Throne of Glass case specifically, when someone criticizes Chaol and another person points out that Rowan behaved far worse, it’s not because they want a Rowan stan to suddenly like Chaol. It’s usually an attempt to expose a double standard.
Chaol Westfall is arguably one of the most hated characters in TOG. He is scrutinized for every hesitation, every poor reaction, every moment of failure, while other characters are excused, romanticized, or outright glorified for actions that are equally harmful if not more harmful.
He is still hated unfairly for Nehemia’s death, despite the text making it clear that Nehemia planned everything herself and that Aelin later reflects on this in Heir of Fire. Holding Chaol responsible for something Nehemia knowingly arranged (and that the narrative itself later reframes) is scapegoating.
Meanwhile, Dorian manipulates, disregards consent, and uses his privilege without much self-reflection early on, yet his behavior is frequently framed as charming or romantic. Rowan is cruel, demeaning, and physically violent toward Aelin, never offers a meaningful apology, and even speaks with contempt about his dead wife and is still positioned as the ultimate book husband.
The Cadre have centuries of bloodshed behind them and are treated as misunderstood warriors. Even Lorcan and Aedion are often afforded more grace than Chaol.
What’s especially telling is how this pattern repeats with new readers. Every time someone starts TOG, Chaol becomes the designated villain of fandom discourse, while characters like Dorian and Rowan are almost universally adored. Liking Manorian or Rowaelin is treated as the default.
You don’t have to like Chaol. But pretending he’s uniquely awful in a cast full of deeply flawed men {many of whom are treated far more generously by the fandom} says more about fandom bias than about the character himself.
