Have you ever wanted to push someone away?
To spend as little time interacting with them as possible? To make sure that they don’t want to be around you? And to make sure that it’s their idea – so you can blame them for it?
Constantly second guess their decisions. All of their decisions, from their most important life choices to what to have for lunch. No matter what it is, make sure that they know that they could have done better.
Let them know that their ideas and beliefs are wrong. Both in general and specifically, especially about anything that is truly meaningful or important to them.
Make sure they feel stupid for even thinking that. Don’t bother explaining why they’re wrong. Unless you can make them feel bad by doing it.
And – every step of the way – make sure they know that (unlike them) you’ve got it all figured out. That you’re right.
Start doing this, and you’ll see results almost immediately. If done consistently, the effects will be permanent.
Can you tell I’ve been spending too much time online lately?
I can’t tell you how many supposedly Christian sites and commenters are doing exactly this. Using this approach to interact with other people.
Saying all manner of angry, hateful, and/or fearful things. And then trying to dress it up with some “Jesus talk.” Maybe a slogan or a Bible verse out of context. Following this approach every step of the way.
If this is our approach, it kind of doesn’t matter what we’re talking about. What great and good cause we think we’re defending.
Because if this is how we’re doing it, if this is the “Jesus” that we’re showing people? Then we’re not showing people Jesus at all.
We’re showing people us. We’re showing them how small and weak and fearful we are.
And we become the reason they turn away from Jesus.
If we want people to go away, this works. Every time.
If not, here’s something else we could try.
“We do not draw people to Christ by loudly discrediting what they believe, by telling them how wrong they are and how right we are, but by showing them a light that is so lovely that they want with all their hearts to know the source of it.” - Madeline L’Engle