#funny superman

[jasontoddscrowbars]

Clark, flirting with Batman at the Justice Watchtower. Thinking they are alone but accidentally having his hand on the intercom button as he had Bruce pinned against the panel.

Clark: you gunna be home tonight?

Bruce: hmn

Clark, now in a deep southern drawl: I was thinking about instead of heading home to the farm, I could just go to your place and save a horse and ride a Batman.

From deep within the bowls of the tower, Hal: HA!

Bruce:

Clark:

Clark: *lifts hand clicking button off*

Clark: I’ll go put myself in time out.

Hal: don’t forget to tie up your horse!

[authorissitohbi]

Nuff said.

[ginnyvelociraptorpancho]

[complexcomix-blog]

Lol

[jasontoddscrowbars]

Bruce was invited to diner with Ma and Pa Kent by Clark a few weeks after they discovered their identities.

Bruce offered to help clean the dishes.

Ma: so, how old are you Mr Wayne?

Clark, blushing: ma!

Bruce grins at them.

Ma: what! He’s handsome and so young looking!

Ma, elbowing Clark: just your type too.

Clark, morotified:

Bruce: I wish I was young but I’m actually kind of old.

Ma: nonsense.

Bruce went and dipped a dish into water. As soon as he did he froze. He tucked his lips in as he crossed his legs. They stared at him. Pa snorted a chuckle as Bruce cleared his throat dropping the plate into the water.

Bruce: I’ve touched water and now I have to piss.

Ma: ah. I see.

Ma: well we all reach that point of age.

Clark: *facepalms*

Bruce took off down the hall excusing himself.

Ma turned to Clark with a wicked sneer.

Ma: you always did like the older ones-

Clark: Ma!

[jasontoddscrowbars]

Damian: you damn mutt! Put your peenier away.

Bruce, passing his room:

Bruce: I am NOT falling for this one again.

Jon: but it’s happy to see you! Look!

Bruce, turning sharply back around: dammit.

[jasontoddscrowbars]

Tim: Dad, come look at these case files.

Bruce: I’m coming!

Clark: not off camera you’re not!

Bruce:

Tim:

Clark: I mean…

Clark: no, I meant what I said.

Tim: I’ve touched that camera!

[jasontoddscrowbars]

Snippets of diaries of the Wayne and Kent families if they lived next door to each other before they knew who each other was part one:

Dear Diary,

The neighboring kids stole a branch in our yard and are sharpening pieces of it. I can only assume they are preparing for war or are about to get ready to lotf this shit.

It’s starting younger and younger.

Jon.

Dear Diary

I saw the neighbor kid face plant into the sidewalk. His dad has huge glasses and must be blind as a bat. He had a giant branch in his yard. Just sitting there. The idiots obviously are weak so we’re making spears for them so that they can survive. They obviously don’t know how to fend for themselves.

We must protect the little guys.

Damian.