#geraskier shitposting

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

Geralt: Dress appropriately, Kaer Morhen gets cold. I don’t want you to freeze before you meet my brothers.

Jaskier: 

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

Jaskier: (doing the love at first sight walk across the tavern)

Geralt, trying to brood:

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

Geralt: Please behave yourself. We are in public.

Jaskier, enraged: 

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

Adding to the Kaer Morhen bestiary collection one volume at a time.

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

Geralt approaching Jaskier from around the corner, doing his best Steve Irwin impression: What a beauty this one is. Just look at this bard luxuriating in its natural habitat. It’s not often we see one of these in the wild, but this is a pure-bred Dumbicus Thotticus.

Jaskier, whipping around to flip him off: (offended bard noises)

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

Geralt: Please stay (at camp, at the inn, in our room etc) where I know you’ll be safe. Or at least as safe as someone as irritating as you can be.

Jaskier “Do It For The Vine” Pankratz: Yeah, okay. Sure.

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

You know what I really, truly love about the Witcher fandom? 

We looked at Medieval Fantasy Poland and said, “You know what doesn’t exist here, in Medieval Fantasy Poland? Homophobia. Fuck that.”

And we just kinda washed our hands of it? Like I see it here and there but it’s never really the MAIN POINT of a fic. It doesn’t crop up enough to be a major trope. Fucking...changing the bath canon is a trope but not homophobia. 

That was really cool of us to delete it like that.

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

Geralt Roger Eric du Haute-Bellegarde-Pankratz de Lettenhove of Rivia and his husband Julian “Jaskier” Alfred du Haute-Bellegarde-Pankratz de Lettenhove of Rivia.