@jegulus-microfic / february 18: pet / word count: 572 cw: foul language and violent behavior
James doesn't easily get annoyed, but his biggest pet peeve is people who do not say hello when they arrive at a place, so every time it's his turn to be in charge of the till at the cafe where he works, he struggles to control the twitch in his eye. When the next customer only mutters "venti iced americano, hurry" without even looking up from his phone and throws the money on the counter, he just puts on his best customer service smile and clenches his fists.
Not even five minutes have passed since the order was placed but the man in his early forties is tapping his fingers loudly on the delivery counter and alternating between staring at his watch and at James insistently. Fortunately, there aren't too many customers at this time of day, so Lily and Mary don't take too long to get the man's order ready.
"Is it too fucking hard to make a good fucking drink? I asked you for iced and this is lukewarm!" says the man in a voice loud enough to silence the café that was previously echoing with the soft conversations of customers.
Under normal circumstances James would probably have explained that all that needs to be done to make the drink colder is simply to stir it, but putting on his best smile he offers a "Oh, sorry about that. We'll redo it!" the customer is always right and that shit, right?
So when the drink is handed to him for the second time and the man literally spits the sip he took on Mary, James is ready for a confrontation.
"Are you an idiot or some kind of mentally retarded? This doesn't taste like fucking anything! You bunch of morons were dropped on your heads when you were babies. And you pair of bitches..."
Just as James is about to leap over the counter and punch this asshole, the man is pushed and cornered against the wall in the blink of an eye.
"Can you shut the fuck up?" says Regulus, one of the regulars who comes almost every day after work, shaking the man by the collar of his shirt with his ringed hands. And if James always notices how he sits at the table closest to the counter, and they constantly exchange glances it's nobody's business.
"But-"
"I don't give a shit, you've been throwing a tantrum this whole time and I won't take it anymore so get the fuck out of here this very second or I'm going to shove what's left of your coffee so deep up your ass to see if you can finally taste it." Regulus continues before pushing him against the wall one last time and letting him go.
The lovely customer starts to walk slowly towards the exit, but halfway there he turns around as if to say something.
"I promise they'll be finding your remains for the next four months if you don't walk out that door now," the silver-eyed man says before the forty-year-old can add anything else. The thing is, he says it so menacingly, like he really means it, that James feels weak in the knees.
Physical or verbal violence isn't supposed to be attractive, but this may have awakened something in James.
So please, no one judge him when a few hours later he ends up tangled in his bed from head to toe with Regulus.
a/n: eating a lot of shellfish for my anemia made me feel better but everyone around me says I'm still pale asf T-T also ngl I don't the way I wrote this chapter but I'm too sick to redo it sorry huhu
tags: very vague hints of abuse near before the end
English isn’t my first language so there will be grammatical errors
Pls don't repost my work anywhere without my permission
Constructive criticisms and any kind of interaction are more than welcome
Requests are currently closed but my ask are still open (read pinned)
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Days pass and it’s now mid-November. To others, it just signifies the start of winter. Signifies the extreme cold that’s about to come.
For Cale’s group and the Whale Tribe, it signifies the start of battle. Signifies that they must now obliterate Arm’s First Battle Brigade.
Where does _____ fit in all of this?
Besides Cale, that’s where.
After their talk, the healer became practically glued to Cale with the man saying all kinds of reasons to take them everywhere.
In this particular case, his excuse is that they need to have a healer in case of an emergency.
Hannah snorted at the blatant excuse curated by the young master.
What makes it funnier for her is how after insisting they need a healer, Cale just went ahead and gave everyone potions after the battle.
“Why are you giving me a potion? I thought that little healer of yours didn’t have purification powers, I’m sure they can heal me.”
Cale frowns as if it’s a sin to even mention _____.
“_____ is still at the ship. I can’t have them out of commission so early so make do with the potions.”
“Human you’re lying again! I definitely heard you say on the way here that kind _____ shouldn’t see such a messy sight!”
As Raon spoke in his mind Hannah also burst out laughing.
This made the redhead turn around to leave. His frown etching deeper into his face as the two unknowingly gang up on him.
Everything goes smoothly.
Of course it does, Cale’s planning is always top-notch.
They managed to win against Arm’s First Brigade. They managed to take the remaining ships, Cale also managed to get permission from his father to let the Tiger Tribe stay in Harris Village.
But Cale is still not happy.
This is because he has to go to the empire. A place where the Sun God’s church influence is strong. The one place he can’t take _____ to.
It’s dangerous if someone, like a priest, discovers who they are. It’s still too early to let _____ back out into the world. Too early for them to fight their battles.
So when Count Deruth asked Cale if _____ could stay at the Henituse castle he allowed it. He may not be sure why his father is asking for the healer but he knows nothing bad would happen. It would also be a good opportunity for _____ to socialize more. Cale has noticed them trying to initiate conversations so meeting new people would probably be good practice.
What doesn’t know is that Hans had a hand in making this invitation come true.
Needless to say, the influence wasn’t direct. It’s just that every report the butler made included the healer which made Cale’s parent’s curious. It was also obvious that Hans thinks the two have chemistry so the Count and Countess wanted to take a look.
The whole family is aware that _____ is alive and in hiding. Aside from them a minimal amount of very trusted servants have also been informed. These servants are the most loyal to the family and in turn have been chosen to directly serve _____ during their stay.
Basen, in particular, has heard his parents talk about _____. He has heard them speculate about whether or not the healer will get together with his brother. And so when he met them he had full intentions of checking whether or not they are worthy of his brother.
Meanwhile Lily was none the wiser. All she knows is that the pretty healer must hide their face because bad people are out to get them. That and their abilities are amazing, she still remembers that refreshing feeling she felt when _____ healed her before.
With different intentions, the siblings went to greet the healer after their parents did.
Lily instantly got along with _____. Meanwhile, Basen and his parents nodded in approval..?
Approval of what? _____ doesn’t know. They’re just glad that everyone is kind.
The entire Henituse family, including Cale before he left, told _____ to just roll and play around. Treat their stay at the castle as a vacation.
Give _____ some credit because they tried really hard to follow their words.
However, they only lasted 3 hours before they were on their way to get permission to assist the knights' training.
Good thing Cale saw this coming so he informed Count Deruth in advance how _____ has a strong sense of responsibility.
The Count approved of them healing the knights but not replenishing their energy. _____ understands as they know stamina and endurance are important virtues to being a knight.
Another thing that Count Deruth noticed is how the healer seemed interested in administrative paperwork. Coincidentally, it was also how everyone found out that they’re a fast reader and learner.
“Healer-nim[1] are you interested in administrative work?”
The Count asked the next day while they were all eating breakfast.
“A little bit, but more than that I just noticed that the documents here look different from where I came from.”
Excuse me what now? How could they immediately tell that there was a difference when they only saw the document for half a minute and they weren’t even that close to it?
“You managed to read all of it?”
“Ah, I’m sorry was I not supposed to? I only read the first page because the rest was covered…”
Basen who couldn’t help but ask reassured _____ that those are public documents so it was fine to read them.
“...That’s so weird. In my previous place, they hid things like that. The ledger here is also different…”
Now that got Deruth’s full attention.
“How so?”
“Back when living with the Perduellios, I saw their ledgers a few times. Unlike here, the ledger there seems to have lapses in entry, but they aren’t very noticeable. Then they have two sets of ledger? I’m not sure why though maybe the people there aren’t as skilled as Basen so they need a trial ledger…”
That…
That’s definitely a textbook case of either fraud, tax evasion, or embezzlement. Or possibly all three.
Not that _____ would know because they never received proper education.
Speaking of their education…
“Healer-nim may I ask how did you learn to read and write?”
Countess Violan asked politely.
“I learned by accident. My room was where they used to put books that were for donation. They didn’t renovate it fast enough so I managed to check out those books. Then after a few days, I accidentally memorized the alphabet.”
This…
Doesn’t this mean they have a genius on their hands?
They let the topic go and switched to more lighthearted ones, like whether Cale is treating them well, as breakfast progresses. However, the Count and Countess didn’t forget about what they talked about.
That afternoon the Count sent sample administrative documents as well as beginner books to _____’s room. He also told the healer to come to him or Basen if they had questions or wanted to learn more.
Meanwhile, Countess Violan took it upon herself to teach the healer noble etiquette. With _____’s permission of course.
And that’s how _____’s stay in the Henituse Castle became an impromptu how-to noble 101 lessons.
_____ isn’t sure how this happened but they're just happy to be a part of whatever’s happening.
Aside from learning and healing _____ also plays with Lily whenever the young girl has free time. More often than not Lily would spend her downtime looking for the healer and asking them to do more light tricks. To which _____ is more than happy to do so.
So their schedule is as follows:
In the morning they would eat breakfast with the whole family.
After breakfast, they would either learn etiquette from Countess Violan or read the books Count Deruth gave them.
Then after lunch, they would either help heal the training knights or play with Lily.
It’s vastly different from how _____ spends their day with Cale but it still felt fulfilling.
However, the healer still felt more comfortable at the super rock villa.
This was because their movement was pretty restrained in the castle, unlike in the underground villa where they could wear whatever and go wherever they wanted. They can only roam around inside the castle and they can rarely let their guard down.
But it’s still fun.
_____ likes the new experience it brings. They like the new things this family is teaching them.
Plus it’s not like they were isolated because they could still talk to the servants assigned to them.
The healer's cheeks are dusted a soft pink hue at the maid’s compliments.
“Ah please refer to me by my name or just healer, I’m not a young master…”
“Nonsense! Young master _____ is a young master!”
_____ feels like they had the same conversation somewhere else before…
“However, was young master-nim born with the gift of learning fast?”
Lily, who was on her way to play with _____ overheard the conversation.
“Hmmm, I guess to some extent? Even before I was adopted people have told me I pick up things fast. But I’m not sure if those were empty words because my adoptive family still deemed my learning speed slow.”
The maid styling _____’s hair made a noise of protest.
“There’s no way that’s the case! I bet they were just jealous that young master-nim is a genius!”
“Huh? Me a genius? Ah no, no. There’s no way. When I was a kid I was punished because I can’t learn things in one go… I think someone like Lily-nim is a genius, not me.”
The maids and servants attending _____ began protesting about how both Lily and _____ are geniuses.
Lily then decided that she had eavesdropped enough and finally knocked on the door.
“Ah young master Lily, please wait a moment young master _____ is almost done getting ready.”
That evening, as Violan tucked Lily in, the girl spilt what she overhead to her mother.
In turn, Countess Violan told Count Deruth.
Then Count Deruth told Cale after he got back from looting- investigating the empire.
“Huuu, they just keep adding more sins to their list.”
Count Deruth did not comment as he heard the angriest sigh leave his son’s lips.
“As we talked about before I’ll let you handle the Perduellio family. Just talk to me if you need anything and I’ll make it happen.”
“Thank you.”
The two talked a bit more before they both left the Count’s office. As they turn into a corner they see _____ playing with Basen and Lily.
“Cale! You’re back! I heard what happened at the empire, did everything work out fine?”
Ho? So Hans was telling the truth when he said Cale and ____ have been on a casual first-name basis since a month ago.
Another thing that Deruth noticed was how his son’s face relaxed at the mere sight of the healer. It was as if he was never angry in the first place.
Deruth Henituse approves.
Cale and _____ hadn’t even gotten together yet, much less have asked for his approval.
Nonetheless, Deruth Henituse approves.
[1] I'm honestly not very knowledgeable about kr name honorifics, I only grew up learning the fil and jp ones so I'm unsure of this one
like... I feel like Deruth's status is too high for him to address reader with nim but it also feels awkward if I don't put an honorific at the end... send help
Would 17 and 30 Ryomina be okay? Recently found your works and loved how you wrote the pair in the 2022 kinktober asks!
I’m so glad you enjoy how I write Ryomina! Also, just. Fuck yeah! Love getting to write for my number one favorite persona ship (Tatsujun’s a close second btw)! And, I hope this is satisfactory and is some sort of improvement from the earlier kinktober works for these too. Good and sadistic or masochistic, as well as including enough knife for some good ol’ knife kink! I tried, and I think this is a good balance with my ever sought after variety lol. Though, I will warn ya, this one might be a tad...gorey? Or, like, bloody. It’s a bit bloody for sure. Sorry if that’s too far, feel free to ask for another kinktober work if u want a redo or smthn, lol. (I also just love getting kinktober asks, they’re very fun)
Kinktober prompt list: Here
Kinktober masterlist: Here
CW: Blood is spilled, knife kink is to blame lol. Minato’s also kind of sadistic, and Ryoji’s definitely a masochist here. The usual freebie teratophilia/monsterfucking energy, blowjobs, also! Just a general warning for spoilers for persona 3, and morbid dialogue relating to animals. Nothing zoophilic, just dark.
Minato smiled as he balanced his knife on the chest of the beautiful man beneath him. The tip of the blade dug into his pale flesh by the weight of the blue-haired senior’s hand on the hilt, Ryoji’s refreshingly blue eyes locked onto the blade, even as he laid back on one of his many pillows with his swept-back, chestnut hair a bit of a mess around his round, pink-tinted face.
“Y’know, Ryoji, when you said you wanted to give me a graduation gift, I didn’t expect this to be what you meant.” He hummed, the shirtless man only able to give an awkward,
“I...um, I mean, you did always say you wanted to mark me up? So, happy graduation! Sorry you missed it! Go crazy, as an apology!” while he laid on his circle-shaped, pillow-covered bed. A small chuckle a failed attempt to cover the way his eyes were wide with a melancholy mix of nerves, guilt, and arousal.
“You sure? If you’re scared of the knife, I won’t use it.” the wildcard hummed flatly, even as he lifted the blade away from the bead of blood that formed where the sharp point of the knife had dug into him.
Which, was probably a good idea, as Ryoji gave an honest, hearty laugh that shook the blue-haired man who straddled him in his boxers and one of the brunette’s button-ups.
“Aw, Funeral lily, that’s cute. But come on, we both know what I am now, right? A kitchen knife isn’t going to do anything to me.” He reminded, which was a green light for a darkly trouble-making grin to spread across the midnight-haired man’s fair face before he tossed a leg back over the brunette’s body to instead climb off of the bed. The confused look the move earned responded to with a small smile.
“Great! Then I’m not wasting anymore time. Get on your knees, Mochizuki.” He ordered, the weapon in his hand used to gesture to the bright yellow sunflower carpet that was only one of the many pops of color that the immortal brunette used to brighten the gothic architecture of his bedroom.
“Wait, but, I thought you’d, y’know, want to mark me? Or, well, at least try, since I don’t really scar.” Ryoji asked even while he moved to do as he was told. And, his point was hard to argue, since the small bead of blood Minato had gotten with the tip of the kitchen knife was already a scab. But, that did little to dissuade the eager excitement already in the wildcard’s blood.
“I will, don’t be impatient you slutty pincushion.” He snorted with a pat to the man’s head once he was obediently on his knees in front of him, “But I haven’t had sex in literal years, so now that I can walk around, I’m going to take my time and enjoy this.”
And, while that explanation made Ryoji blink up at Minato with a bit of surprise in his blue eyes, all it took was a small nudge from the flat of the kitchen knife to silence any further conversation or inquiries.
So, instead, the tall brunette obediently set to work on freeing the man’s erection from his boxers so that he could start the foreplay before he got stabbed. First, with almost tentative swipes of his warm tongue at the base of the wildcard’s dick. Slowly trailed up his length with low moans to encourage him. Then, when Ryoji got to the tip, gentle, ghostly kisses. Which, he lavished onto the head of Minato’s cock until a bead of precum could be lapped away.
“Fuck, Mochi...I see you haven’t fallen out of practice…” The wildcard joked while he watched the brunette’s thick lashes fall over his eyes at the taste of the salty fluid. But, Ryoji didn’t respond to the small jab, he just took him into his mouth to begin a gentle amount of suction that earned a louder moan.
Finally, he began to bob his head slowly. More of Minato’s length taken into the warmth of his mouth with each movement, just enough suction added when he pulled back to quicken the wildcard’s breaths, and his tongue kept to the underside of his cock for extra stimulation as a swift reminder of why the brunette had been such a swift hit with the girls of Gekkoukan
Yet, that night wasn’t a usual night. Because, if it were any night before Minato’s coma, it would’ve taken more than Ryoji’s playful, patient pace to infect the blue-haired wildcard’s head with a feral voice that urged, Fuck his face. Slam into his mouth, it’s not like he can suffocate on your dick. Even if that WOULD be insanely hot. And, on a normal night, Minato wouldn’t have had a knife to keep at his lover’s neck.
“God damn it…” Minato muttered to himself, his eyes closed so he could relish the moist warmth of the tongue his cock sat on, Ryoji’s nose now buried in his pubes so that the brunette could huff whatever musk the wildcard had. Before, after a long moment, he pulled away and let his member go with a soft pop of his lips.
“You doing okay, Funeral lily? You want me to- Woah!”
Ryoji’s question died in the air when Minato firmly pressed the point of his knife into the dip where the brunette’s throat met his shoulder.
“No! No, I don’t want you to stop, why the hell would I want that?!” He snapped, teeth barred at the reaper as his knife drew a new bead of blood that swiftly trickled down along his collar bone.
“I-I was just checking! You were breathing very fast, I didn’t want you to pass out or something,” The brunette explained, his sapphire eyes wide as they watched the silver glint of the blade.
“I won’t fucking pass out, fuck you.” Minato snarled while his cock twitched in impatient agreement. Though, his ill temper, naturally, didn’t deter or scare the brunette sat before him. Which, while Minato understood, still irked him a bit.
There was simply something annoying in the way that Ryoji moved his eyes to look up at him, the affection and lust that had shamelessly filled his eyes from their first interaction slowly dulled by the return of his guilt, any hint of fear squashed by a hint of regret that snuck in the moment the brunette no longer had a dick to focus on. Which, honestly, might’ve been the real reason Minato’s lip curled down at the man in that moment, aside from the simple irritation that came from the lack of sexual release.
So, he soothed his own anger with a quick slash at Ryoji’s neck with the kitchen knife. Done to earn a yelp, and rekindle the pink blush that had faded from the brunette’s cheeks, but, also to stir up a darkly sadistic joy in Minato as well. The masochistic pleasure that washed away the guilty shine enough to return Minato’s less malicious, lascivious enjoyment while he watched the gash heal itself shut. Only to jab the tip of the knife into the cut just before it could completely heal.
“You were serious, huh? You’re really just gonna let me go crazy on you with a knife?” He asked, the dark lust that filled his words almost enough to shake the wildcard, if he hadn’t been too horny to care about his own moral standing.
“Uh-huh…” Ryoji panted out, which got a raised eyebrow as he continued, “Like I said...not like you’ll kill me, so. It’s just kinda hot, not scary.”
“Why? I mean, other than the masochism of it, I guess.” Minato hummed, the tip of his knife slowly drug across the man’s offered throat to create a new wound and let more thick blood spill down his chest.
“Be…” The reaper’s voice was even weaker when he spoke that time, his head lolled back, lust glazed over his eyes like a layer of ice over a pond in winter. “Because...You’re no threat to me. So, you trying to be, is...cute. Like...like a fox trying to intimidate a hunter’s gun.” And, the morbid reason made Minato snort a bit before he pulled the knife out of Ryoji’s throat to let him heal.
“Well, that’s good, I suppose. Now, open your mouth.” He abruptly ordered, though the reaper’s obedience enough to make his cock twitch once more.
So, with his lover’s arousal in mind, and his own impatience just beneath the surface, the wildcard grabbed Ryoji’s swept back hair and pushed himself back into his mouth. Though, he didn’t bother with a slow, or really even compassionate pace. Ryoji Mochizuki was Death, he could take a dick being shoved down his throat for a few moments.
Which, Minato took advantage of to fuck into the man’s mouth while one hand was kept tangled in his slicked back hair. Though, the tall brunette made no move to stop the harsh treatment. Instead, he only let out muffled whines and moans, kept his tongue pressed against the bottom of his lover’s dick, and his hands on the carpet so that he didn’t jolt to hard while Minato lost himself in the pleasure. Unhindered moans released into the air to dance with the quieter, needier noises of the brunette. The knife kept, as best as Minato could manage through the haze of his desire, at the god’s throat. Any scratches or jabs little more than fuel for the two’s desire.
Until, all too quickly, Minato’s thrusts began to turn as sloppy as his breaths. His thoughts little more than fuck...god damn, fuck… before they were vanquished with the wildcard’s other senses in a blinding blast of white-hot heat.
And, when those senses returned, Minato found himself not on his feet, but crumpled bonelessly into Ryoji’s arms, his head on the taller man’s shoulder while he ran his fingers through Minato’s midnight hair.
“What...the hell…” He breathed, his thoughts like sand in his skull, “I...Why am I so tired? Why did that...Did I even orgasm?”
“You did,” the brunette assured with a laugh, his tongue swiped over his lips as if to double check that he got it all, “You even managed to get most of it in my mouth before you collapsed.” Minato only able to huff at that last part, his cock only able to weakly twitch in its own complaint,
“That’s so embarrassing. I don’t collapse after a fucking blowjob.” He muttered, though the brunette only squeezed him and scooped him up to place him back onto the circular bed.
“You also don’t sleep for seven years, funeral lily. Give your libido time to build back up, dear.”
While he spoke, the tall god crawled into bed beside Minato and cuddled up to him despite his continued mutters. Though, while it hurt his ego a bit to admit, the wildcard knew his lover had a point. So, he caved and let the brunette bring out his wings to drape a large, iridescent-black appendage over him like a blanket.
“We’re gonna fuck again once I have my breath back, though.” He warned grumpily, with a kiss his only response.
Five tags and I gotta do it, right? Thanks @annabtg @mppmaraudergirl @blitheringmcgonagall @jamesunderwater @arianatwycross for the tag!
List the titles your top five priorities for WIP updates (link your fics for new readers!)
An upcoming scene, event, or detail in each fic that you're looking forward to writing
Bonus: make a poll for your followers to vote on which top 5 WIP they are most excited to see an update on!
Then tag 10 writer friends!
This is going to be... interesting. I'm in a finish some wips before I post new ones zone, so that's super fun for me. So, top 5 by priority:
Chance would be a fine thing - Wolfstar A/B/O fic
The next chapter on this one is ALMOST done. Like, half a smut scene. I've been at like half a smut scene left for like a month, though, and I'm not sure why I can't get this one out. We meet James and Regulus next chapter, which is exciting!
Give Me a Sign - Wolfstar - Deaf Remus Soulmates
This one needs more work. The next chapter should include meet the parents (that the Potters and the Lupins), but what I'm most excited for is writing Sirius dancing around his kitchen, singing and signing to some song on the radio to Remus's amusement.
Summer Boys - Wolfstar Childhood Friends to Lovers
Again, this one is just one chapter, but I think I'm going to have to redo basically all of what I have drafted of Chapter 3. Exiciting things coming: Wolfstar double dating Jily at a carnival.
The Moon that Calls Your Name - Jily - Werewolf Lily AU
Coming up in this one is Lily's first full moon, but also some discoveries she makes when she transforms. 😉
Ignite - Canon Jily Secret Relationship
I've actually been making decent progress on this one recently, which I'm thrilled about. Still no estimated date of return (sorry!) Coming up that I'm excited to write: A second quidditch match plus a surprise twist for spectator Lily.
I know that's five, but I've never been good at following rules, soooooo.....
Lessons in Defense - Professors Moonchaser AU
This one has the most to go, but I've been thinking a lot about them recently. It's probably lowest priority on this list because it've got a long way to go on it, but it is coming! For this one, I'm very excited to get to/write Christmas!
So, this is chapter 2 of my fic but in Sirius’ POV, honestly I hadn’t remembered some of the batshit crazy things I had written until I was copying them into this chapter and like damn it’s insane
Does include the uncertainty prompt from @wolfstarmicrofic
CW: graphic depiction of violence
Links to other chapters here
Reminder that Remus’ pronouns for this fic are they/them, Sirius’ are ze/zis/zer/zhe/zeir/zey
Also fuck JKR and the rhetoric that she spouts that’s transphobic, homophobic, racist, antisemetic, and if I’m forgetting anything else then I’m deeply sorry
“We need to meet. I need to tell you something, the time is finally right. Meet at our old hang out spot , the one you always hated, I’m sorry but it’s the only one I could trust going to. I’ll wait as long as you need.”
Sirius left the note on the sidewalk, hoping that somehow Remus would find it, they always seem to be on the lookout so they probably would…right?
Happy that soon zey would finally see zis love again, but still terrified for what would come next, zey trekked back to where it all started. Trains, buses, hikes, all the way to that grungy shack that felt more like home to Sirius than Grimmauld ever did.
Despite how much simpler things would be to meet up at Mary’s apartment, there was still a fear about how Remus would feel finding out about all of this in Mary’s home, especially with them finding out about Mary and Sirius communicating. They already had trust issues, this would probably destroy any trust left if it isn’t handled correctly.
And so Sirius waited, going through the plan over and over again with James and Lily. Redoing the silencing spell every once in a while just in case.
“I go down there first and speak with Moony, then once they seem to have calmed down some–you guys come down. Don’t, and I repeat: do NOT come down these stairs unless the man seems at least partially calm. This is an insane situation and I’d rather not terrify Moony.”
“Yes, yes, we heard you the first 10 times,” James nodded.
“Where did that impulsive little annoying loud kid go?” Lily questioned.
“You married him,” Sirius quipped.
“I think my wife is referring to you, Sirius.”
Zer eyes glazed over for a moment, thinking about where they did go, cold metal bars, shrieking from all around the tower, never being quite aware when zey were the one yelling. This is about Remus, they remembered.
“I-I just want to do it right for Remus…”
“Yes, we know, give the man some space and some time to come to terms with the truth before bombarding them with it,” James said, the plan was somehow so simple to him by this point.
They spent some time laying around and waiting.
“We should have brought cards.”
“Are we even sure they’re coming?”
“Maybe we could finally talk about the other situation–” James started.
All thoughts and conversation was stopped by the sound of the door creaking and stomping shoes on the wood floorboards. The couple turned to face Sirius.
“Well…I’ve got to….”
“Good luck Sirius,” Lily patted zem on the shoulder.
James’ arms wrapped tightly around Sirius, “We’ll finally have our Moony back.”
Sirius shook, stepping down, trying not to go too fast or too slow, trying not to fall down the steps. Until making it to the bottom floor. Remus was examining the wood, their back turned on the other side of the room, staring at the spot where years ago Padfoot had watched them transform for the first time.
“Remus…” Sirius started to say.
They spun around to face Sirius, swiftly pulling out a knife and pointing it at the other man.
What. The. Fuck. Unsure of what else to do, Sirius shot zeir hands empty hands into the air, hoping that might make a difference in whatever might happen next.
“I don’t mean to cause trouble,” ze spat out, trying to sound calm as the love of zeir life is threatening to kill them with a knife because of the deaths of two people who are entirely alive and upstairs.
“Of course you don’t, you never do, you lying bastard,”as Remus spoke memories of past mistakes filled zer mind, of the prank, of thinking Remus was the spy, of all the thoughts zis head tried to believe and tried to swat away like an annoying fly while in Azkaban, all the you killed them, it’s your fault you’re hear, it’s your fault Remus is alone, all of it swirled like the worst brewed potion made by an idiot or possibly evil first year at Hogwarts.
Sirius’ eyes were the size of two moons, not a great comparison since that’s also something that brings Remus blinding hot rage. They were closer than the minute before, as Sirius’ mind came back to right here and now, they were moving forward.
“I just…I-I need to tell you something, but I don’t know how.”
“What, you’re gonna tell me you love me, beg for me to come back to you like we’re 16 again, like things are that simple again,” Remus backed zem into the wall, holding the knife to their neck, why is this hot, why the hell is this hot, this should not be making me blush, this man is ABOUT TO TRY TO MURDER ME…I’m such a dog, but then it started to hit zem, is Remus really going to....
“James and Lily are dead, and you’re barely even you anymore. Padfoot is gone and dead, Lord Black just needs to join them.” As Remus spoke tears began to appear in Sirius’ eyes, this is what they really think of me? Ze questioned, but no, Mary’s told Sirius well enough that Remus isn’t okay, this isn’t the man who loves me…right? They wouldn’t call me…they wouldn’t call me Lord Black, not as anything other than a stupid joke.
Are they really about to–Sirius stared, the blade next to zis neck…is this it? I should have had my wand, I should have explained better, I should–
Sirius glanced up for a moment, and then stared, right behind Remus there he was: James Potter in all his savior complex glory, pointing his shaking wand out. Lily next to him, trembling. Sirius’ eyes met James as zey felt liquid begin to sprinkle down zeir neck, like small rain before a storm. Despite the fear, still meeting James’ eye, zey almost screamed, “no–”
“Yes,” Remus said in response, moving even closer than before.
At the same time, James spoke, “Accio knife.”
Small droplets of blood began to trickle down his neck, Remus’ fingers brushing it. Sirius’ heart raced, Remus’ eyes never leaving zem. Staring for an eternity.
“I–I don’t know what to do…don’t leave,” Remus begged as they started holding onto Sirius, Sirius didn’t know what to do other than hug them back. How did it get to this? How did we get here? Zhe thought as ze stared at James, trying to hold back zeir tears.
“Please, let me explain.”
It took a while for them to respond, until finally there was a quiet, “okay.”
I didn’t think this far…why couldn’t Mary be here? She could say it so much better.
Sirius took a breath before saying, “I was falsely imprisoned, for a crime I didn’t commit.”
“Why should I believe you?” Because it’s me, because it’s me and you, the stars and moon, Sirius and Remus, the galaxy. Because I love you…and somewhere you have to love me again too, please.
But Sirius knew zey shouldn’t and couldn’t plead to Remus’ emotions, not now, not after, “Just, let me continue…I didn’t commit the crime, no one did.”
“You expect me to believe the Potter’s killed themselves and their child.”
Sirius was about to respond, ze really was, zeir mouth opened and ready to say they didn’t really die, but they saw a few feet away, Lily. No no no, no Lily, they’re NOT READY!
“No, because we never died,” Lily’s voice rang, Merlin Lily……WHY, I guess I couldn’t have said it better.
Remus broke apart from Sirius and turned to stare at the Potters, until their eyes darted back to Sirius, “What are you doing to my brain?” It’s too soon for them, it’s too much.
“What do you mean, Moony?” Lily spoke softly.
“None of this is real, IT CAN’T BE REAL, I–” they breathed heavily, “this isn’t real, I’m alone surrounded by ghosts by thoughts by everything fucked up in MY MIND.” Remus’ hands ran manically through their hair. Sirius wanted to reach out, to ground them, to help them realize this was real, but then there was the part of zem that was still in shock. The part of them that had blood running down their neck. The part of zem that was honestly terrified of the person next to zem.
“Moony, we’re back, please,” James touched their arm. Immediately Remus backed away, quickly into the corner of the room.
“No…no, no no no,” Remus shook their head, “no, it can’t be real. I’m alone. I’m alone , I’m sorry I couldn’t fix this before and make things right but you don’t need to….my mind doesn’t need to lie to me.” They fell to the floor, their eyes wide as they trembled.
“Remus, look at me,” Lily spoke softly, starting to crouch next to them. “Look at me,” she spoke sternly this time.
James moved next to Sirius, both the men hoping that if they couldn’t help Remus then Lily would be able to. Sirius struggled trying to rip a piece of cloth from zis shirt, ze couldn’t focus on it, couldn’t bring zis eyes away from Remus.
“Look at me,” James whispered, “Just look at me, I know it’s hard, I know it's scary and you want to stare at Moony because you always do, but just look at me for a second.”
Sirius nodded as James helped rip the clothes and apply pressure to the wound. “Hey, we’ve done this before, we’re okay, everything will be alright,” James spoke again.
Sirius heard Lily speaking to Remus from across the room, “I need you to take a deep breath for me, I know it’s a lot, but it’s real.”
“Lily I–” James turned to face his wife, so of course Sirius let zer eyes wander back to Remus, breathing like a madman, pulling away from their best mate in a far less friendly game of tug of war, Lily had always had a strong grip so the “game” went on for eternity.
“GET AWAY FROM ME,” Remus screamed, breaking their hands free and pushing Lily away.
Moony looked back to Sirius, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I’m sorry,” they wailed as they ran out the door, into the night.
Can I forgive them? That was the only thought in zeir head as ze stared at the door, holding a bloodstained cloth, an uncertainty with how the hell to move forward.
I had to redo this one and unfortunately Rave was a labrat to my lineart experiments and mood I'm so sorry that you took like a month to finish g r a h-
That aside I'm kind of proud of this but not at the same time- there's something about his anatomy that's kind of uhhhh ruined-
Sidenote I'd probably disappoint him with my abysmal barely-passable-for-honors report card that probably influenced this piece a little lmao
Summary: Maybe there really is a fine line between hate and love.
Disclaimer: Gif isn’t mine, credit to whoever made it
A/n: Guess who’s backk! And with a cheesy, probably all-over-the-place Sirius fic. Enjoy!
+ + + + +
It was nearing 4pm; The Three Broomsticks was as busy as you’d ever seen it. But then, it was a Hogsmeade weekend and cold outside - of course everyone would want cover from the snow. You pulled your half full butterbeer to you and hoped no one would remember it was your turn to battle your way through the swarms of Hogwarts students and Hogsmeade residents just to get to the bar to buy more drinks.
A pretty bar maid passed by the table you were sat at, taking the empty glasses that had piled up in the middle, leaning forward to grab the last glass before weaving back through the people standing and laughing around.
“I just can’t believe that in a few months time, we’ll be leaving Hogwarts for good!” Lily said, shaking her head and frowning a bit. You glanced over at your red-headed best friend and nodded, “I know, it’s gonna be so sad knowing we’re not going back in September.” If you were being truly honest, none of you knew if you’d actually even be alive come September, due to the impending war and rise of Voldemort and his death eaters.
Sat beside Lily, James wrapped his arm around her shoulders. You’d never known them to be so happy, and you were so glad they had found each other. There were a few bumps in the road, but the couple had finally gotten together a few months back and had been the cutest couple at Hogwarts.
Which should make you happy. In fact, this whole afternoon would’ve been amazing, if not for the man sat two seats away from you, between Remus and Marlene.
He sat there, wearing his worn leather jacket, fingers curled around his butterbeer glass as he smirked at something James said, looking like a goddamn snack. Arsehole.
You scowled, looking down at your drink. Sirius Black was the bane of your existence, a plague in your otherwise half-decent world. A handsome, god-like plague, but a plague all the same.
“Another round?” You heard him announce as he looked around the table. “We better get going soon actually,” Remus noted, checking the time, “We’re due to head back to school soon.”
“C’mon, live a little, Moony! We all know we could just sneak back whenever we want. Let’s have another and wait for the snow to pass,” Sirius said as he stood up. Remus grumbled something inaudible under his breath, before replying, “Fine, suit yourself.”
Sirius smirked, looking around at everyone - all seven of you (James, Remus, Peter, Lily, Marlene, Dorcas, and yourself) - before standing up, “I’ll be right back.”
You watched his retreating figure, glaring holes into the back of his head as he leant casually against the bar.
Merlin, you hated him.
“We all know that’s a lie.”
Your head whipped over to the source of the voice, your eyes fixating on James as you narrowed them slightly, “What’s a lie?”
“That you hate our Pads, we all know you don’t,” he shrugged matter-of-factly. You hadn’t realised you’d said anything out loud but...
“I do. He’s arrogant, he’s conceited, not to mention the most annoying and loathsome toad I have ever had the displeasure to come across in my life.”
“Now now, L/n! No need to be so feisty,” Sirius drawled.
You fought the need to roll your eyes. He passed around the butterbeers, everyone thanking him before you realised he’d missed you out.
“Think you bought one less than we need, Sirius,” Marlene said, looking over at him. He glanced at her before staring over at you. “Whoops, my bad, guess you’ll have to go without, L/n,” he said, feigning an apology.
You glared at him, clenching your fists under the table, before smiling sweetly and replying sarcastically, “No no, it’s fine, we all know how hard it can be to count to eight.”
Sirius sat, looking at you for a moment, tongue darting out across his bottom lip, before scoffing at you and shaking his head. He then shot you a cheeky smile as he pushed his own glass towards you, nodding towards it. He then turned away, starting up a conversation with Remus, Marlene and Dorcas instead.
You were silent, reluctantly taking the drink and running your finger around the rim of the glass.
James tried to hide his smirk by taking a sip of his butterbeer, before answering, “Just tell him.” Raising an eyebrow, feigning your confusion, you tap your fingers on the table next to your glass, “Tell him what?”
“That you like him.”
You nearly choked on air, “Well, you know, I would, but I don’t like him, so yeah I’m not gonna do that. But thanks for your suggestion.”
“You’re the one who always complains about him being with other girls. In fact, you can’t seem to stop talking about him, ergo, you like him!” James continued, Lily humming in agreement next to him.
You glanced over at the boy in question to find him deep in conversation - thankfully he wasn’t hearing what James was saying.
You sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose, “Look Potter, I don’t know how many times I have to tell you, but I will spell it out in plain English so then maybe you’ll understand. I... do not... like... Sirius... Black. In a platonic or non-platonic way. I merely put up with him as I am quite fond of our friendship, though right now I am unsure as to why. Just as I am unsure as to why you’re friends with that asshat in the first place.”
James laughs, shaking his head, “You’re just saying that because you know deep down I’m right. If it’s any consolation, he likes you too.”
“Highly debatable,” you replied, pushing your glass away from you.
____________________
Monday mornings were the worst. Particularly this morning. You stumbled from your dorm room and into your common room, trying to do your tie on the move. You were already late, which meant that you’d have to miss out on breakfast, which means you’d have to sit through Slughorn droning on about potions whilst your stomach rumbled.
You grumbled to yourself as you shoved your bag onto your shoulder and ran towards your potions classroom. You’d be late regardless, but better to be five minutes late than half an hour.
“You’re late, Ms L/n. 10 points from Y/h,” Slughorn states as you enter the classroom in a hurry. You cheeks turn red as you realise everyone is staring at you. “Sorry Professor,” you ducked your head down, taking your usual seat next to Lily.
“As I was saying, today we will be starting a project where you will choose a potion and create it outside of classroom hours. You will be finding the ingredients and preparing the potions yourself, and you will be working in pairs for this-“ you looked over at Lily who grinned back at you, “- assigned by myself.”
There were hushed murmurs across the class at the revelation, getting louder as Slughorn read out names. Your heart beat faster. Please don’t put me with Black, please don’t put me with Black, please don’t-
“L/n and Black...”
You groaned, your head dropping to the table as you muttered out a string of curses.
“Why hello there L/n!”
”Oh for fuck’s sake,” you groaned, siting up and tilting your head back in annoyance, “Could this day actually get any worse?!” “Tsk tsk, language,” Sirius chastised with a smirk, leaning towards you and thoroughly enjoying the fact that you were less than impressed with the general goings on in your life at this moment in time.
He was so close to you that all it would take was you to turn your head and you’d be practically kissing him.
Stop thinking about kissing him! ____________________
You were sat in the library, waiting for Sirius to show up - that is, if he was actually going to show - flipping through a book on advanced potions and making notes on your favourites. You’d agreed to meet here as you had a free afternoon, however he was late - something you’d foreseen happening anyway but it didn’t make it any less annoying.
You’d been there a couple of hours before the library door finally swung open and Sirius strolled in, shirt untucked, collar up and him redoing up his buttons.
“Busy day?” You asked him sarcastically as you looked up at him, eyeing the lipstick stain on his neck. Your heart clenched, but you refused to think about why this was. He chose to ignore you, “I lost track of time.” “Clearly,” you commented, raising your eyebrows.
He scoffed, pulling his collar down, “Let’s just get this work done. What potion are we doing?”
“The Calming Draught. It’s one the easiest to collect the ingredients for, but just complicated enough to earn a high grade on,” you explained, looking back down at your textbook.
“You’ve put a lot of thought into this,” Sirius commenter as he sat down across from you. “Yes well I’ve been here for nearly three hours now, whilst you were off with some girl in a broom cupboard somewhere,” you offered him a sarcastic smile.
“Stop being so jealous L/n, it’s not a good colour on you,” he teased, offering you a lazy smirk, “Besides, you could be one of those girls in the broom cupboard if that’s what you want.”
You pushed your potions textbook over to him and gestured at him to read it. Looking at his handsome face, his chiselled jawline and the way he ran his tongue across his bottom lip as he started reading, you couldn’t blame the girls. In fact, you weren’t entirely sure you’d be able to say no yourself.
Over your dead body would you ever admit that to him.
“I can assure you that is the last place I’d ever want to be,” you lied.
____________________
About a week later, you were sat with Lily eating dinner when you noticed Sirius entering the Great Hall.
Lily noticed the change in your demeanour and tilted her head to one side, silently asking if you were okay. You gave her a nod and a fake smile, one you were glad she didn’t look too much into.
The black haired boy sat beside his friends at the end of the table you were sat on; you could hear them laughing and joking around. Allowing yourself a glance over as you took a sip of your drink, you saw Sirius was already looking your way, so you quickly turned back to Lily.
You were so focused on not staring in his direction that you didn’t notice that he’d moved to sit beside you, until you felt an arm brush against your own. You looked up at him, your heart jolting as you tried to keep a blush from forming.
“Sirius, to what do I owe the pleasure?” You asked carefully. “Can’t a guy sit next to one of his friends now?” He asked with a smile, grabbing some food and putting it onto his plate. You barely noticed Lily sliding down the bench towards James as you turned fully towards him, “I feel like you want something.
“I want a lot of things. Right now though, all I was gonna ask is if you got all the ingredients for that potion or if you need me to get anything.”
“Oh! I um... I managed to get everything already, I just need to start actually preparing it. I’m planning on using one of the potions classrooms after dinner, you’re welcome to join me.”
“Gladly.”
____________________
Sirius followed you into the empty potions classroom, watching as you brought out your textbook from your bag.
“Would you mind grabbing a cauldron from the cupboard please?” You asked as you set out the ingredients.
The black haired boy opened the cupboard at the back and grabbed a cauldron out for you, placing it on your table.
“I’ve got all the ingredients here, including lavender, peppermint and crocodile heart. It says if we do this correctly, the potion should be a blue colour,” you explained to him, turning and nearly jumping out of your skin when you realised how close he was standing behind you.
“Just let me know what you need me to do L/n and I’ll do it,” Sirius said, the corner of his mouth lifting up into a small smirk. You nodded, getting started on the potion.
You were just about to add the peppermint when you glanced over at Sirius, who was sat at the table, resting his chin on his hands and staring at you with an odd look in his eye.
“Why do you keep looking at me like that?” You said nervously, tucking your hair behind your ear and looking away from his gaze.
”Like what? ‘M not looking at you in any kind of way,” he shrugged innocently.
You raised an eyebrow at him before shaking your head and letting out a soft laugh, “Never mind.”
____________________
The morning after, you, Lily, James, Remus and Sirius were eating breakfast.
“Anyone got any plans for the summer?” Remus asked as he flipped through the morning newspaper.
“Well, I’m going to spend it with my Lilyflower here,” James spoke dreamily as he leant his head onto her shoulder. She raked her hand through his head before saying casually, “We’re thinking of getting married.”
Sirius choked on his pumpkin juice and Remus leant over to pat his back, “You’re getting married?!”
“We’re thinking about it. What with the war rising and all, we don’t want to wait in case heaven forbid something happens to us,” Lily explained. “We know we want to spend the rest of our lives together, so why not make it official,” James added.
“You’ll need a wedding dress! Oh there’s been some really lovely designs come out recently, we’ll have to take a look once we get back home,” You grinned at Lily.
“I want something simple I reckon, nothing extravagant, maybe a bit of lace,” she mused.
“That would suit you so well. There’s so many pretty designs, I saw a few when I was shopping with my cousin for hers - I think I’d want one of the ball gown ones, or maybe a mermaid cut.”
“That’s if you can trick some poor sod into marrying you,” Sirius muttered, though it was loud enough for the table to hear and you knew he knew it.
“You’re insufferable,” you scowled, “Why are you being such a git?” This earned a half-assed shrug from him. If Sirius was honest with himself, he didn’t really know why he was himself, all he knew was that as soon as he said it, he regretted it.
That, and he realised he kinda wanted to be that poor sod he spoke about.
“One thing for sure, I don’t think I ever went to get married,” he covered smoothly.
“Oh?” Lily asked, subconsciously running her hand through James’ hair, “You don’t?”
You looked up at him in curiosity too.
“Nah. It’s... it’s not for me. I couldn’t stick to one girl,” he shook his head. He was lying, he just didn’t want to admit the girl he would settle down with probably wouldn’t settle down with him.
“Oh right... I forgot who we were talking to,” you said, shaking your head. “What do you mean?” Sirius asked with a frown.
“Sirius Black: a new girl every night, no strings, no feelings. Never taking anything further. Leave them before they leave you right?”
That hurt him. Somehow, despite everything he’d been through with his parents, you sharing that you thought about him like that hurt more. He glared down at his plate. “Yeah, I’d prefer that than being like you. At least I know I’m wanted,” Sirius retaliated, not thinking about what he was saying until the words had left his mouth. He froze - why did he say that?
You gave a fake smile, and let out a humourless laugh, “I don’t have to deal with this.” Standing up, you grab your a few bits of food and bid goodbye to James, Lily and Remus - “I’ll see you guys in class.” - before heading out of the Great Hall.
“Y/n, wait!” Lily jumped up, running after you.
“Padfoot...” Remus shook his head at him. Sirius clenched his jaw, “What.” Sighing, James took a bite of his toast, “Just, sometimes you don’t know you’ve got a good thing when you’ve got it.”
“What are you talking about,” Sirius frowned. James nodded in the direction you had just ran off in. “Y/n?” Sirius said in surprise.
“I see the way you look at her Pads.”
Sirius scoffed, shaking his head.
”You look at her like she holds all the answers to the universe, like she’s your moon and stars, like you can’t bear to be without her. You like her. You do, don’t lie to me Pads, I can see right through you.”
Sighing, Sirius looked down at his drink, “So what if I do, she doesn’t like me like that.”
“You don’t see it, do you?” Remus let out a small smile as he turned the page of his newspaper. “See what?”
“You’re fucking oblivious mate.”
____________________
“I don’t know why I let him get to me,” You shook your head as you stood outside the bar. “It’s because you care about him,” Lily said gently, squeezing your shoulder gently.
“Yeah? Well I shouldn’t. I shouldn’t care about him, or his stupid face or his stupid suits or his stupid... jawline,” you sighed.
“I... I think I love him, Lily. I didn’t think I did before, but I’ve realised I do. And he’s an asshole. An utter and complete asshole and I... I fancy the fucking pants off of him. And I didn’t even realise. He came into the library after clearly being with someone the other week, his shirt and shirt a mess and-and I got annoyed. I thought it was just because he as a person annoys me but I’ve realised... well it’s because I wanted to be her. Whoever she was.”
Lily wrapped her arms around you and pulled you into a hug. “I think I’m just going to go to my dorm and skip class,” you whispered, hugging her back, “You head back to James and enjoy the rest of the day, okay?”
You pulled away, smiling encouragingly at Lily, who looked reluctant to let you go.
“I’ll come to check on you later,,” she finally said helplessly.
”I’m counting on it.”
____________________
“She likes you,” James said bluntly, shaking his head at his best friend. “What are you talking about?”
“She likes you. And you sleeping with other girls all the time hurts her,” James said as Lily rejoined the table.
“What? No it doesn’t,” Sirius shook his head, though he didn’t sound certain.
“Are you sure about that?” Lily asked. “Of course I’m sure, why would she care who I sleep with?”
”Why would anyone?” Lily posed the question pointedly. Sirius shrugged, staring down at his drink.
“For Merlin’s sake, she likes you Pads. Fuck, for someone so smart you sure can be stupid,” Remus said.
“Y/n doesn’t like me. Don’t be ridiculous,” Sirius shook his head. He paused for a moment as the news sunk in, “Y/n likes me?”
At the nods from Lily and James, Sirius jumped up and ran out of the hall.
He sprinted towards your common room, dashing around a corner as he saw a glimpse of your h/c hair.
“Y/n! Y/n wait!”
“Y/n!” you heard your name being called out. You turned around to see Sirius chasing after you.
“What could you possibly want now? You’ve been nothing but a dick to me! I thought maybe we’d become friends through bloody working together but clearly I was wrong! So what is it? What do you want?”
“I want to tell you I’ve decided that maybe I might want to get married some day.”
“What? Why would I need to know that?”
“Because I’ve found someone I want to marry.”
Your heart clenched - that hurt more than you expected.
“I thought you ‘couldn’t stick to one girl’,” you pointed out bitterly, raising an eyebrow in surprise. He gave a small shrug, “Yeah well, maybe I’ve decided I want to.” “Why the change of mind?”
“Someone changed it for me,” he smiled.
You nodded, swallowing as you tried to keep the smile from falling off your face, “Why are you telling me this?”
He leaned forward and it was only then that you realised how close he was to you. Your breath caught in your throat as you found yourself getting lost in the darkness of his eyes. He leant down slowly, nudging his nose against yours as he brushed his lips across your own gently. You smiled sadly, pulling away from him slowly, patting him on his chest.
“I er... I should go...” you said softly, moving out of his arms and trying to walk away. Sirius’ heart clenched, “Wait!”
He followed you down the hallway, reaching out to grab your waist and pull you back to him, “Why are you running away?”
“I’m panicking!” You looked into his grey eyes and tried to step back, but he held you close.
“Why?” He whispered, as if his voice would break if he spoke any louder.
“Because you’re Sirius Black, you-you sleep with girls and leave them soon after. I-I don’t want to be just another one of them,” you stuttered softly, closing your eyes and tilting your head down.
You felt him brush his fingers under your chin and slowing move your head up to face his as your eyes opened to meet his. He leant forward, his lips just about brushing yours again, “You’re not just another one of them sweetheart.”
“Then what am I?”
Sirius let out a breathy laugh and shook his head fondly. “You’re mine,” he murmured, before his lips were on yours.
I really like Tequila from Lee's world. What would that weird Tom/Ginny combination be like if Lee had never returned to the HP universe? Would they become more like October Tom? Or something else entirely? How would Tequila handle the mad creature their main soul has become?
Oh man, you give Tequila far more credit than I do.
For simplicity’s sake, I’ll refer to Tequila below as “he”, mostly because it’s really Wizard Trotsky at the wheel in “Minato Namikaze and the Destroyer of Worlds”. He just happens to rock Ginny Weasley’s adolescent body.
Tequila’s a hot mess, a dumpster fire, and it doesn’t matter if he’s pining after Tom Riddle’s childhood friend Ellie Potter, if Tom is stuck in a diary only to be released to confront Ellie/Harry Potter, or if he’s stuck in a diary and released only to find out Ellie Potter isn’t even there. Tequila will always be a mess.
Let’s say Lee never showed back up. Tequila’s life would be one of hilarity and woe.
Wizard Trotsky likely would have continued masquerading as Ginny, i.e. being Tequila, out of a sheer lack of ability to answer the question “what the hell do I do now?” That’s why he stuck around as Ginny in the first place.
So Tequila goes to Hogwarts, milks “I’m an invalid, woe is me, I can’t go to class cough cough I am traumatized by snakes on planes” excuse for as long as he can get away with it (which is forever) and ends up with decent marks (having gone through Hogwarts twice now) but not nearly as good as he once had or, say, Hermione has because he’s gotten profoundly lazy. Sadly, this still puts him ahead of 50% of Hogwarts’ population.
Similarly, Tequila’s effort at impersonating Ginny Weasley is half-assed at best. However, because Ginny went through an incredibly traumatic experience, no one gives him shit for it or wonders “Hey, is this really Ginny?” Due to this, Tequila’s soul is dying inside even more than usual. He doesn’t even have to try around these assholes. He could walk up to the wall, spray paint “I am Voldemort, bitch!” and they’d probably just try to console him.
Lee showing back up out of the ether is the most exciting that has ever happened to Tequila possibly ever. It’d be better if Lee wanted to do epic ninja battle, so Tequila could prove how cool and not useless he is and defeat his prophesied enemy, but even Lee just being in the castle, insulting everybody, and lighting all of Hagrid’s pets on fire is amazing.
But anyways, Lee never shows up.
Tequila gets a pretty good idea of who the original Death Eaters were thanks to gossip but there’s not much he can do about it as all the Death Eaters (aside from the ones in prison) have disavowed Voldemort out of self preservation. His showing up as an adolescent schoolgirl just doesn’t have the same effect and it’d be a little hard to prove who he is given that he doesn’t even really know these people.
Not to mention that Voldemort was this distant thing in the future for him and he has no idea how to actually go about doing any of that. The actual Voldemort has many years experience on him in recruiting, guerilla warfare, logistics, etc.
Tom Riddle was in dueling club one time, it was great, he learned things.
So Tequila likely wiffle waffles a lot, telling himself, “One day, I’m going to run out on all these assholes, return as Voldemort, and then Granger will cry” only to sigh and realize it’s far more realistic to start from fresh. Besides, why just try to redo what his other half did, he wants to be his own person (a better more competent version! He won’t get blown up by any toddlers!) and that means finding his own cause. And if he can make Dumbledore’s Order his Order, then great.
Not to mention there’s the disturbing possibility that Voldemort’s not quite dead. Now, Tequila can give this credence as being the horcrux, he knows that Voldemort’s not really dead. He’s amazed Voldemort managed to blow himself up with a baby, amazed, embarrassed, and offended, but Tequila isn’t willing to completely throw out the idea that Voldemort’s this evil wraith who occasionally possesses muggle studies professors. Not exactly on Tom Riddle’s bucket list, but clearly, the original screwed up everything and doesn’t even deserve Tequila’s respect.
(Tequila went through a brief, extremely brief, period of wondering if he should seek out the main soul and help him return it to power. Being the horcrux, technically, he should probably serve the original soul.
Then he remembered that asshole had one job, only one job, and he ruined it. Tequila was shoved into a diary for nothing and look what happened. Now there’s a national Harry Potter Day. Clearly, the wrong half of Tom Riddle was put out of commission and if you want it done right you’ve got to do it yourself.)
So, in 1994 without Lee’s involvement, Voldemort returns from the grave. Because I’m realistic, Neville probably dies. Sorry, Neville, you lived a good if short life and I’m sure you gave it the college try. Dumbledore falls into despair and “THE WORLD IS DOOMED!” mode now that all his even remotely prophesied children are MIA and immediately gets the Order of the Phoenix together.
Ginny, being thirteen at the time, isn’t allowed because that would be ridiculous. Despite it being ridiculous to include thirteen year olds, Tequila is pissed that he’ll have to wait another god knows how many years before Molly lets him do what he wants.
Offscreen Dumbledore probably goes through varying levels of extremely horrifying solutions to the Tom Riddle problem.
First, he probably goes horcrux hunting. Unfortunately for Dumbledore, in “Lily and the Art of Being Sisyphus” and “Minato Namikaze and the Destroyer of Worlds” there are only two horcruxes and only one was intentional. Tom had originally planned to make seven but the hangover from the first one was so mind breakingly awful he went “New plan, I will make one horcrux, and then I will think of something else”. He never really got around to thinking of anything else.
Dumbledore, however, doesn’t know this. So he dutifully collects memories, banks on Tom’s ridiculously romantic nature, and starts going to places of importance. Not to reveal too much, but Tom actually laid several traps around for those poking their nose around looking for his horcrux. Dumbledore steps into several of these with not so good results.
Given that one of the horcruxes is Ginny and the other is still stuck in Konoha without any access to magic, Dumbledore is 0 for 2.
More, given that only Neville Longbottom was prophesied to have the ability to defeat the dark lord either Dumbledore has to somehow resurrect Neville or else get himself a new Neville. Because I love terrible, but funny, things let’s say he does both and we get a round of Pet Semetary (sometimes, dead is better, Albus) and pulling in Harry Potters/Neville Longbottoms from other dimensions (but miraculously not Eru Lee somehow, which is great for her because she’s busy having a terrible time in the third shinobi war).
Back to Lee for a bit and why Dumbledore’s first solution isn’t just to desperately try and find her.
First, she is completely off the map and has been for years. She isn’t even registering as “dead” or “in mortal peril” she’s just gone. Somehow finding her and hoping, miraculously, for her blowing up Voldemort a second time just isn’t on the table.
Second, Lee’s involvement in the prophecy is... a bit wonky. This has been noted a bit in “Lily and the Art of Being Sisyphus” but the prophecy in “Lily and the Art of Being Sisyphus” and “Minato Namikaze and the Destroyer of Worlds” actually explicitly does not refer to her in that it specifies a male child born at the end of July. This is because the universe is falling apart and we’re all doomed, doomed, doomed, but that’s a different story. Point being, especially in this Lee-less version, Albus has no idea what’s up with Lee but he’s putting his money on Neville. Poor, dead, Neville.
Tequila meanwhile gets to read news of how everything’s going to hell in the dumbest way he can imagine. Voldemort clearly came back wrong and missing a lot of brain cells, even with a body he keeps not taking over the ministry even though they’re practically begging him to do it, and everything he does is not only a) very embarrassing but b) it prevents Tequila from rising into power and becoming amazing.
Clearly, he must be stopped, there can only be one Lord of the Rings.
Well, destroying him completely means destroying Tequila first, and we can’t have that. So Tequila comes up with the only reasonable solution: they have to seal Voldemort’s evil spirit away in some magical artifact.
Tequila drops out of Hogwarts, goes adventuring for a few years, finds some exorcism sword or something and learns how to use it. Comes back and anticlimactically defeats Voldemort while everyone else was busy panicking and Hogwarts was being invaded or some nonsense.
Nobody, not even Tequila, knows how to handle Voldemort’s sudden and very anticlimactic defeat.
Then Tequila recovers and shouts “Weasley is our king!”
Tequila, probably eighteen around this point, is voted the youngest Minister of Magic ever. With Dumbledore dead, Tequila strongarms his way into taking over the Order of the Phoenix, and everything’s coming up Tom Riddle.
Only then Tom Riddle has that terrible sense of deja vu as the, “What now?” question hovers in his brain. Once again, he has absolutely no answer. Tom is the dog who has caught the car.
Congratulations, Tom.
TL;DR: Without Lee, Tequila would probably end up dealing with the original Voldemort himself/herself. He’s still a mess, he’s learned nothing, and at the end just finds out that actually, he didn’t want to be in power, being in power is stupid.
All he figures out is that he has no idea what he wants.
