this is a genuine question… why are people hating on polyminds? I’ve only recently learned about them but it just seems like IFS without it being applied in therapy - and I see some intending to use their system (the medical term) in therapy when possible.
So far I haven’t seen any polyminds claiming to be plural, but moreso a collective of selfstates or subpersonalities that have been given roles to better understand the self. Not like… larping being a system.
This is a genuine question so please don’t be an ass if you reply 😭 both anti and pro (and neutral) opinions are very welcome as, again, this is a genuine question and I’m curious to see what other people think. Like I said, this is new to me, so I’m just seeking more clarity on the situation.
anger is a valid emotion. it orients my sense of justice and how i want to be treated. i can express anger in healthy ways. i am allowed to feel angry sometimes [white knuckle gripping the sink]
Wait, I don't get it, what's the difference between dissociative disorders and IFS? I thought it wasn't normal for presences that are not you to have their own beliefs and voice and emotions and sometimes take control of you but if I understand it correctly isn't that just what IFS is? So if I'm getting it right having parts that want to do their own thing that contradicts all the things you want to do and be is something instinctual that people force themselves to unlearn, in which case I don't think I quite get the difference between singlets and systems? Like aren't all systems just...people who are good at IFS?
ding ding ding, we have a winner
prefacing this with - i am not a therapist. i am a DID diagnosed system who has been undergoing IFS therapy
IFS is a therapy style that originated with a therapist trying to treat a singlet with an eating disorder. it wasn't a case of this being an entirely separate personality, or a case of her blacking out and this part piloting the body. the therapist had tried everything he could think of to help her remain mindful and not give in to the eating disorder
the man mainly worked in family therapy, which is about mediating conversations between different people and helping them find a solution that works for everyone present. out of curiosity, he started treating the situation like family therapy, and started talking to the part of that patient who needed the eating disorder. by identifying that there is some part of the patient who liked some of the effects of the eating disorder, speaking to that part directly allowed the therapist, the patient, and the part to find a way to give that part a better outlet for those concerns
IFS is a tool specifically designed to help singlets who have other disorders identify that they have parts who are trying to protect them
a part with an eating disorder might see itself as protecting the Self from other people's judgements
a part with an anger disorder might be trying to defend the Self from betrayal
a part with extreme depression might be bottled up emotions Self won't let itself touch so it can function in society
a part with a substance abuse disorder is trying to help Self avoid pain
its normal for singlets to behave in ways they know aren't the way they want to behave ideally. a singlet is someone who, most of the time, can function as one singular identity. IFS steps in when that singlet finds themself with some behavior they dislike and can't shake, and helps them narrow down why they're doing what they're doing
according to the IFS model, everyone starts out as a system, many fragments of identities and thought patterns and behavioral patterns. a baby has no concept of a singular identity. throughout childhood, the kid learns more about themself and most thought patterns fuse together into a singular identity
a dissociative system is a single body that experienced circumstances that didn't allow those parts to fuse together, or circumstances to force those parts back apart. the way that somebody lived was too disruptive and fluctuating for that somebody to handle as a single person, so multiple identities grew up alongside one another and became a system
the only difference between a singlet and a dissociative system is that the singlet believes it only has one set of thought patterns and beliefs. for a vast majority of the population, that's all someone needs
however, IFS therapy has been given to scores of singlets, and they come out of it as endogenic systems. there are no memory gaps for them, but these singlets in IFS generally become endogenic systems. they don't seem to come into plural communities, probably because they don't really consider themselves to be proper systems. however, ive read transcripts of singlets' sessions in IFS, and i believe they undergo endogenic syscovery
i don't believe in clinging to disorders and their definitions. a disorder is a type of behavior that researchers have encountered frequently enough that they want to warn therapists that these behaviors exist and guide them in how to help somebodies with those disorders
imagine you have people exploring a jungle. you have a group that's been walking thru the jungle for years, and a group that is preparing to go into the jungle for the first time. the experienced group made a book for the new people, and it identified broad categories of animals they will see. "this is a frog, its a small slimy animal that jumps around and has a long tongue" "this is a panther, it is a large furry animal with sharp teeth and roars", etc etc. the new people go into the jungle and encounter a salamander and a tiger. the salamander is similar to the frog, but it isnt a frog. the tiger is similar to the panther, but it isnt a panther. however, because those animals are similar enough to what the experienced group described, the new people know how to interact with the salamander and the tiger
this is what the DSM is. it's not a definitive list of every type of disorder a person will ever encounter, its guidelines for therapists to identify what their patients are experiencing, or similar things to what that patient experiences, and to guide therapists on types of treatments that might help the patient
when i started IFS therapy, my therapist told me that because i had already identified that i am part of a system, we can skip step one of IFS, which is learning what a system is. the second step is identifying parts, which went a lot faster for us because we had already started to track altera. the later steps of IFS are focused on getting these parts to talk to one another, which is different for dissociative systems, because cofronting might not be easy
the post that sparked that rant was saying that "because hyde was created by a potion, jekyll and hyde can't be a system". however, i believe a system is about what the end result looks like, not about the circumstances under which the system syscovered. jekyll in the book says he identified a long time ago that he had multiple parts of himself, and that the potion helped him give hyde an easier time coming to front. that sounds like a system to me
or that show severence, where people undergo brain surgery to become a system. those parts of themselves, the happy leader, the zealot, the diligent worker, the rebel, they existed in those people before the surgery. they just didn't need or couldn't find those parts because of the life they lead. they became systems and those other parts of themselves became people in and of themselves. an outie choosing not to let that innie have the ability to front anymore feels like murder to an innie
the only difference between a singlet and someone with a disorder is when the system with a disorder isn't able to function well in the environment they are in, because the circumstances that caused them to form borders between these parts are no longer present in their lives. a person who experiences abuse and develops alters to cope with that abuse only becomes disorderly when that person is removed from the abusive situation
disorder means "the current setup isnt working". dissociation is a disorder when it prevents the person from living a life they and the people around them enjoy. its the same thing with OCD or narcissism or low-empathy, etc. its only a disorder when the behaviors keep that person from experiencing a life they can enjoy, or cause them to directly impact others
being a system isnt necessarily a disorder. being a system isnt some magical prexisting thing that we discovered that a person only experiences when they go through a specific set of circumstances. the world we live in is extremely complex, and many people find it comforting to have multiple parts who each excel in navigating the world in different ways
the game disco elysium did an excellent job representing this. the main character is a system with 26 parts and a Self (host). the Self is able to converse with different parts to decide how the body will interact with the outside world. harry is much closer to the type of system people become under IFS, than the type of system i am part of. the difference is that harry has a concept of Self. he has one singular identity that he uses to make decisions on which parts can be listened to at any given point. we don't have a host. we don't have a singular identity
im not going to police other systems and how they structure things. i am, however, going to defend everybody's capacity to contain multitudes. i think a lot of issues come up when people are too afraid to let themselves be contradictory or have multiple ways they want to be. i think a lot of people would be happier if they could admit that
is a sideblog by @selkra-souza centered around their parts, the inside out fandom and plurality, three things that surprisingly have a lot of overlap.
★ Click here see an introductory post about their Emotionsonas.
★ Click here find original art posts about their parts and inner world/paracosm.
★ Check out this blog’s writings at #self tag.
Disgust is the leading emotion because he’s the best at getting tasks done, which is apparently what matters most in life. He’s meticulous and persnickety. And, he pays close attention to details, unless it’s about people. He’s not a people person. He loves eating fruit, looking at bugs and mushroom and wallowing in dirt gardening!
#green tag
Love considers himself a hopeless romantic even though he doesn’t know what romance is. He values friendship, intimacy, found family and cute plushies. His dirty jokes and bubbly snark often annoys Disgust. He loves baking, strawberries, displaying Valentine's decor year round and shipping only the finest awful fictional characters.
#pink tag
Joy is the “inner child” that Souza hardly ever let go. He’s impulsive, energetic and hardly has an “inside voice”. He knows long term contentment is built on making time to enjoy the little things in life. His endless optimism contrasts with Glooms’ perpetual pessimism.
#yellow tag
Gloom (aka Sadness) is the most sociable part, which is why she’s informally second in command. She’s the most empathetic and the best at handling conversations. As emotionally intelligent as she is, if she got her way completely, Souza would be melancholically lounging on the floor all day eating chips.
#blue tag
Like Disgust, Anger’s not sociable and similarly gets irritated by people. She also spends maybe too much time scribbling up responses and comebacks for imaginary arguments. Even though she’s the most intense emotion, she’s also the most protective.
#red tag
Fear is pretty chill most of the time until Disgust reminds her of an upcoming due date. She’s fascinated by liminal spaces, and frequently explores the subconscious whenever Souza is asleep. She’s cautious but in favor of novel experiences like visiting new places and small talk with new people.
slightly hot take based on talking to some family very close to me. IFS therapy can result in parotraumagenic systems sometimes and is another very prominent form of created systems that doesn't get talked about. So actually fearmongering abt creating headmates to help with trauma is silly and we should be writing resources to help do it in a safe and beneficial way instead
IFS can be funny and tragic at the same time because your most self destructive part might just be an angsty teen who felt a taboo emotion to the rest of the parts.
So I'm currently doing IFS (internal family systems) therapy, and it provides a really interesting framework for understanding my various defence/survival mechanisms, how they interact, and what they're trying to protect me from, as well as how to address them and move towards healing. I'm pretty optimistic about this work helping me with how I handle things going forward! Would you folks be interested in hearing more about my experiences with IFS? 🦇
