#indecisiveness

[would-you-punt-them]

Indecisiveness

Punt it into the Sun?

PUNT!

Don't punt!

Voting ended onApr 30, 2025

[thepersonalwords]

A real value of our lives is in how we use our time as we journey from the womb to the tomb. A great difference between the womb and the tomb is the w and the t! Wasted time! We waste great and precious time as we journey from the womb to the tomb; in the end, we remember the w and the t in a simple statement of regret, 'had I known' ! The wasted time!

Ernest Agyemang Yeboah

[multiplicity-positivity]

hi can we request some advice and support for closeted systems at school trying to choose a career path?

please consider:

- practically no adults know about our plurality and for safety reasons it should stay this way. getting proper acommodations at school is impossible since we're selves-diagnosed and closeted.

- we are median, monoconscious and traumagenic (OSDD-1a) with parts that tend to come and go. that last part means making big life decisions without some form of regret hard

- the most common standpoints we have are "i don't want to work" (reasoning depends on the part), "space + the humanities somehow", "famous YouTuber or author".

- we have a factive who has an interest in his source's career, but feels like being a factive is cheating (this is linked to allegations that his source takes credit for others' work.) also the industry is highly toxic

- the whole "consider your interests/values/ikigai" feels very singlet-centric to us sadly

sorry if this sounds blunt; i am trying to get a lot of info across. i hope others in the same situation can find help and comfor here as we have

Hi! We went through a very similar problem when we were in school, and we’re sure there are lots of systems out there who are going through something similar! Choosing a career can be incredibly daunting, especially when you have multiple headmates who each want something different for your lives. We want to try and address each of your considerations specifically:

- You can express your worries about choosing the right career to an adult in your life without ever mentioning your plurality or your disorder! Even singlets can be indecisive, nervous, wishy washy, or uncertain when it comes to choosing a career, and you could absolutely come to a teacher, career planner, or guidance counselor with these concerns without ever mentioning your own multiplicity.

- We get this! But learning to live with the choices made by your system is an important lesson! We can’t change the past, so trying to take a deep breath, accept what you can’t change, and make adjustments for the things you can may help dealing with regret a bit easier.

- It’s really unfortunate that most people do in fact have to work for the majority of their lives in order to support themselves! If you’re interested in something that combines outer space and humanities, maybe look into scientific journalism, space journalism, or maybe even double majoring in physics/astronomy and literature/art in order to create some opportunities for your collective to combine these interests for a career down the line!

As far as YouTuber goes, it’s never too early to start drafting potential video essays and start planning out what life as a YouTuber may realistically look like for y’all. And as for being an author, you can start looking into what realistically goes into publishing a piece, working with editors, publishing companies, deadlines, and marketing teams, and what comes with being an author outside of just writing.

- It is not cheating at all for an introject to take inspiration or passion from their source in their system’s real life!! If the career choice this factive is interested in is something that seems appealing to the rest of your system, it is absolutely okay to seriously consider and look into it.

- We understand what you mean with “consider your interests” being singlet-centric, so we’d like to pitch you a different question to ask yourselves: Is there a job which your system members could each see themselves doing? What’s something that you don’t necessarily love, but that you certainly don’t hate? You don’t have to love your job - in fact, most people probably don’t. But finding a job that you A. Can each do comfortably, and B. Don’t hate, can make life easier for your whole collective!

Some other things we feel are worth mentioning:

- If you’re in high school, it is OKAY to take a few years of a break between high school and college while you all figure out a bit more about yourselves and what sort of education you’ll need to get a career you could really excel in. In the meantime, working an entry level job in food service or retail is fine! Our system was pressured into attending college right after high school, and that’s left us with a degree that we’ll never really use because we didn’t know what we wanted to do with our life at that point.

- Any job you can do that supports your system is good enough. It’s okay to not have any sort of big career aspirations! It’s okay to just work a job at the end of the day. Besides, chances are, you may not keep your very first job for the rest of your lives!

- Your career does NOT have to be your whole life/lives! It’s okay for your job to not mean all that much to you or make up a key part of your collective identity. You can fill your lives outside of work with things that really do mean a lot to you! You don’t have to live to work - it’s okay to work to live!

We hope this helps! For context, we are 28 years old and have been in the work force for 13 years now. Currently we are a line cook at a Jewish deli. Our dream career is being a librarian. We may never be able to realistically achieve that, so we’ve filled our lives with activities and interests outside of work to help take care of our own mental and emotional well-beings. And we work a job that we don’t hate, that we can physically accomplish, and that pays enough for us to live more or less comfortably.

Sorry this got so long, but this is a huge topic that we have a lot of thoughts on! Ultimately what’s helped us may not help y’all… but we hope that something here will at least be a little bit useful! We’re wishing you all the very best, no matter what your futures hold! 💕

[clemdrawzstuff]

In order to combat indecisiveness with shipping, I just go the poly route! I highly recommend!

[m4y4fun]

Decisions…decisions……

Should I….

Make a Punch Out Askblog!

Make a Kirby Askblog (my au)

Make a Kirby+Punch Out Askblog! (Fighters Of The Stars)

Drawing requests! (Any game, maybe human)

Tell us about your (non-Nintendo) ocs!

Make a Non-Nintendo ocs Askblog!

Post the latest chapter of One Stormy Night!

Just draw random doodles!

Draw My Singing Monsters!

Finally make that Masterpost!

Something else! (Comment or reblog what please)

None of these!! (See results/I don’t know you)

Voting ended onJun 18, 2025

[wanderingmind867]

How do people commit to things? I don't know how people do it, but I admire those who can fully focus on a show and binge it without ever feeling painful second thoughts about watching something else? I can't do it. Bob's Burgers is a show I can get really close to binging sometimes, but even then it's not something my mind is really fit to do. I could only binge something if my mind wasn't going to pay attention to it. But the minute I start focusing, I start second guessing and overthinking everything.

I have like 15 different shows to watch, 15 different plates to juggle. I've started watching Darkwing Duck with my dad, I also started watching the Golden Girls with him (mostly just because it's on Disney+ and I was curious about it), we've got DVDs of Batman: The Brave and The Bold, Batman 1966 and Superman the Animated Series. I've also been watching The Great North with my dad, via Disney+. I have so many things, and I can't freaking choose between any of them! Damn this all!

Seriously, I hate how indecisive I am. If only I could just flip a coin or spin a wheel to decide what to do. But no! No, my brain would much rather just make me feel miserable for existing. I hate it so, so much. It's just a lot. And it gets to me. And I don't know how other people do it. And that brings me back to the original point of this post. I have admiration for people who can do things like commit to one thing. I can't do it, but I wish I could. sigh...

[mbti-notes]

Anon wrote: Hello ! I have a couple issues I wish to improve and want your advice:

Firstly I have this out of sync behaviour. Especially with my mom where I become immature like a teenage brat and say things which I dont necessarily feel are aligned with how I truely feel, like "that person did me wrong blabla they are this and that " although I dont feel the grudges . Its almost as if I am possesed. Could it be that its because I didnt get enough mirroring for her growing up and we were not talking when I was in my preteen? Is this a Fe issue?

Another issue I have is my indecessiveness in life, no matter how brave I try to be I get stuck in dilemmas and they suck my soul out. There would have been less consequences in choosing than all the rabit holes I have to go down to. I feel like all my ambitions have come to dust with my adhd and other issues that are a blockage and I am just feeling lost and say and do stupid things so I can ignore my failures.

Ps. Could you please tag this INFJblackpearl so I can come back and see your answer.Thank you :)

----------------------

(1) I have already written in detail about the complexities of parent-child relationships, so I suggest you search through the site index and relevant tags for previous articles.

(2) There are many possible factors that can contribute to indecisiveness. You must have some understanding of what's causing a problem before you can find the right solution, and it doesn't sound like you have much insight into it, so deeper reflection is required. This means all I can do is merely speculate about what the underlying factors might be based on what is generally common for the personality type.

For INFJs, one common factor is an irrational fear of failure that often goes along with unhealthy perfectionism. This might manifest as having unrealistic expectations (Ni) and/or holding oneself to unreasonable standards that stem from social pressures (Fe). Thus, the remedy would be to nurture a more realistic and/or a more compassionate and forgiving mindset.

Another common factor is being out of touch with one's own needs, preferences, and values. It's hard to make firm decisions when you don't know what you need, don't know what you want, don't know what you like, and/or don't know what you value most. Denigration or denial of oneself is a common sign of unhealthy Fe. The remedy would be to improve your self-esteem and self-worth and take steps to know and honor yourself better.

Another common factor is lack of critical thinking skills. Good critical thinking includes being able to explore, analyze, and evaluate your options in a more thorough, systematic, and objective manner. Feeling inundated with or being too easily swayed by too much information and not knowing how to draw sound conclusions is a symptom of having poorly developed judging functions. There are lots of online and book resources for improving critical thinking.

[monsteracademy]

sona