#jeno fluff

[neogotmycookie]

it's not that deep | l.jn

summary: in the midst of jeno trying to help you pass a statistics class, you become friends, and eventually, that friendship turns into something neither of you can define. you say he fucks around too much. he says you're not his type. and as far as you're both concerned, it's not that deep anyway. pairing: fuckboy student!jeno x f!reader.       genre: university!au, fluff, crack, angst, friends(ish) to lovers, smut! mdni! woop woop   word count: ~25k    warnings: oh boy… jeno and oc are both warnings in this, emotional constipation, a lil toxicity but it's all love, jealousy, they fuck obvs, kissing, spitting, fingering, dry humping, oral (fem receiving), he eats it from the back, multiple orgasms, overstim, dirty talk, praise, possessiveness, light choking, lots of teasing, nipple play, his dicc is big bc…cmon, he's a hard dom but the tables do turn a couple times, rough sex, he alters her brain chem, sweet sex also, multiple positions, jen goes through it in one scene(you'll see), angst!!!!, same page!hae makes a few appearances (yes, that's a warning), alcohol consumption, there's a lot more tbh but im so tired rn  a/n: happy gooning!!! that’s it. that’s the tea. also pls send me love im a desperate whore. i'll get a girl boner for each note/ask. ALSO!!! im now officially an unemployed international postgrad student so pls support me on ko-fi (if you can), it would mean the world to little old me👉🏼👈🏼 i genuinely hope you love this fic. i almost went mental writing it - pls excuse any typos. thank u love u bai :’)  masterlist | ko-fi

Jeno isn’t supposed to be upstairs.  

Jaemin’s party has already tipped into chaos — music too loud, bodies packed too close, laughter spilling into corners it doesn’t belong — and Jeno feels detached from all of it. He’s tried to lean into it, tried to drink past the restless feeling sitting heavy in his chest, but it hasn’t worked. 

Someone mentions his room being occupied offhandedly, like it’s a joke. Jeno barely reacts at first. People drift in and out of rooms at parties all the time. It shouldn’t matter. 

Still, his feet carry him upstairs. 

The hallway is quieter, the noise dulling with every step, and when he stops in front of his bedroom door, something feels… off. There’s no grim moans bleeding through the walls. No laughter. Just a silence that doesn’t quite fit with the rest of the house. 

He hesitates, fingers curling around the handle before he pushes the door open, and his eyes land on you: lying back on the bed with your legs dangling over the edge, one arm resting across your stomach, hair falling loosely around your face. Even from the doorway, you look… different. 

“Y/N?” His voice comes out tentative, cautious. 

His suspicions of you being asleep disappear when your head quickly raises. Your wide eyes show surprise.  

“Jen? Hi.” You sit up quickly, as though you’ve been caught red handed. “Is this your room?”  

“Yeah.” He nods, taking in the perplexed expression on your face. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?” His words come out rushed as he shuts the door behind him, giving you both privacy and all of a sudden, he feels like he’s intruding, even though you’re in his room.  

“Yeah, sorry, just needed some privacy.” You shake your head. “I can go.” You rush to get up and he instantly feels guilt wash over him. 

“No, no. You’re fine.” He cuts you off, his hand waving defensively and you settle back on his bed with a sigh. “Did something happen?” He asks carefully, somewhat worried now. He’s never seen you like this before. Not that he sees you much outside your tutoring sessions, but the times he does, you’re all chirpy and playful, always cracking jokes. He doesn’t know you well but it’s evident that you’re not your usual self.  

“Um, not really.” You scoff, an exasperated laugh leaving you. “It’s silly, don’t worry about it.” Your eyes stay on your hands as you play with your rings and he realises he’s never noticed them before. Pretty, he thinks. 

He moves to sit on the carpeted floor, leaning his head on the foot of the bed, next to where your legs are dangling off the edge. He’s now decided that this situation is a lot more interesting than the chaotic party Jaemin decided to throw downstairs. Half his friends are drunk off their faces, the other half busy getting there, while Haechan and his girlfriend have already disappeared to god knows where. And you? You seem somewhat sober and definitely in need of some company.  

“What’s up, Y/N? You’re clearly upset.” He presses, not happy with your vague answer. Jeno is a nosy guy and he knows that about himself, but in this case, he’s also worried and for some reason, he can’t seem to be able to let this go.  

“I’m not upset.” You defend, making clear that he’s touched a nerve. “I’m pissed off.” Oh? He can’t help but crane his neck sideways to look up at you. Your eyes meet for a split second and it’s clear as daylight now, you really are pissed off. But there’s something else behind your eyes, he can’t quite decipher. Embarrassment maybe? 

“Shit.” He turns to look in front of him again, legs crossing to make himself comfortable. “Who’s the culprit?”  

“Classic shitty ex with his shitty new girlfriend, you know the drill.” You explain, sounding like you hate yourself for even talking about this. Jeno gets it.  

“Ah. I assume they’re here showing off their happiness?”  

“You assume correct.” You confirm and Jeno can’t see you, but he imagines you nodding your head.  

“Want me to beat the shit out of him?”  

Your snort tells him that he’s succeeding at making you feel a tiny bit better and he can’t hold his smile back.  

“You wouldn’t hurt a fly Lee Jeno.” He feels the mattress dipping behind him and when he looks back up he can’t see your face anymore. You’re lying down again.  

“Hey, I work out.” He elbows your calf playfully, earning another tiny laugh from you.  

“Really? I couldn’t tell.” Your sarcasm doesn’t go unnoticed.  

“I see you checking me out when I talk stats.” He jokes, expecting a snarky response.  

“I’m just a heterosexual female, Jeno. I see muscles, I stare.” So, you do check him out?  

“I mean, I was joking, but stare away if it makes you happy.” It’s your turn to make him laugh, kicking him in the ribs lightly. A comfortable silence falls upon you both and Jeno ignores the buzzing coming from his back pocket, probably Jaemin or Jisung looking for him. He’d rather be here right now though. Not because he enjoys your company, he just feels a sense of calmness he doesn’t want to ruin. Or at least that’s what he tells himself. 

“Feeling any better?” He breaks the silence a few moments later and for some reason, Jeno feels comfortable enough to lean his head against your leg, eyes closing to stop the room from spinning. He realises he must be slightly more intoxicated than he thought he was now that he’s sitting down and he smiles when you don’t retract, his temple resting on your soft calf.   

“A little.” You nudge his head with your leg. “Thanks.” You say softly. “And sorry for spoiling your night.”  

“You didn’t.” He reassures you quickly. If anything, you made it interesting, but he doesn’t admit that out loud.  

“How come you’re up here?” You ask, as though you’ve had an epiphany and Jeno lets out a short laugh through his nose, eyes remaining closed.  

“In my room?” He teases and he’s aware that he’s deflecting, but he hopes you don’t catch him.  

“Ha-ha funny. You know what I mean.” It was worth a try, but there’s no deceiving you it seems.  

“Just not in the right mood for a party.” He confesses, sounding almost defeated. And he feels it.  

“Tired?” Jeno can tell you’re sat up now, you voice coming from directly above.  

“Yeah, it appears trying to force knowledge in that pretty little head of yours takes it out of me.” His joke lands well, getting a laugh out of you but then you startle him with a flick of your fingers on the back of his head. “Oi!” He leans forward, hand cupping the spot you just attacked.  

“Insult me again. I dare you.” Your provocative tone intrigues him in a way, even though the pain on his scalp.  

“Damn woman.” He complains, the heel of his hand rubbing his head now. “Do that to your shitty ex and you’ve got yourself a gorgeous homerun.” He jokes and almost flinches when you lightly ruffle his hair in a comforting manner. Soft and tender. A complete opposite to your usual demeanour. 

“Care to answer my question now?” You return to your previous subject, not letting it slide and he’s almost annoyed that you’re so observant.  

He leans back again, resting his head on the mattress and he’s met with your face. From this upside-down angle, he notices the necklace that dangles off your neck as you lean forward to get a better look at him. It’s dainty, like your rings, and it sits prettily between your collarbones.  

“Just felt a bit lonely, I guess.” He admits and he feels exposed. It’s been sitting with him all night. He hadn’t meant to say it, but now that he has, it feels strangely relieving. He can’t quite put his finger on the reason, but he thinks it has something to do with the way you look at him. No judgment in your eyes, just understanding. Could also be the fact that you’re upside down.  

“As in, there’s no one to talk to or no girl to stick your dick in?” Your question takes him aback and if he weren’t looking at you, he might have thought you’re mocking him. Your perfectly serious expression tells him otherwise.  

Jeno shrugs. “Both?” God, he sounds sad.  

“There’s plenty of pretty girls downstairs, no?” You shuffle to the edge of the bed now, sliding down to join him on the floor, mirroring his way of sitting. Though your eyes are on the ceiling, his are stuck on your side profile, your neck and that stupid necklace. Have you always been this captivating or is he just drunk and horny? He’s always thought of you as a girl who happens to be a friend. Not his usual type. Or maybe that’s his way of coping with the fact that you’re actually too good for him.  

“None I’d wanna stick my dick in.” The words leave his mouth before he can contemplate them and your eyes close as you breathe out a chuckle. “Plus, my room was already occupied anyway.” He teases, smiling at the way your kiss your teeth, feigning annoyance.  

“My apologies, Mr. top shagger. I was experiencing a misery crisis.” You retort, lazily turning your head to stare at him. His laugh dies out a second after, but his smile lingers as his eyes drop to your lips for a mere second before trailing back up to yours. There’s mischief written all over your face and for the first time in what feels like forever, Jeno feels flustered. It’s like you’ve got him all figured out and he knows that if you were to read his thoughts right now, you would most likely condemn him to eternal hell.  

“What?” He asks, deflection getting the best of him again.  

“Nothing.” You shake your head, diverting your gaze to your hands again. “You’re the one staring.” There’s a subtle tint of pink on your cheeks and now it’s Jeno’s turn to smirk. You’re shy. Because of him.  

“That’s new.” His observation comes out in a hushed tone. Not intentional.  

“What is?” Your eyebrows furrow in question and your eyes find his again.  

“You’re blushing.” He points his chin at your face and to his surprise you don’t shy away. Instead, you maintain eye contact, one eyebrow raising daringly as you try not to smile, tongue poking into your cheek.  

“And you’re flirting.” The slight tilt of your head gets his heart going a little faster. “That’s also new.” Your smirk returns and your eyes narrow, studying him. 

“Is it though?” Whatever has taken over him, Jeno can’t explain it, but you’re reciprocating and he has no intention of stopping until you do. What are the odds of this going to shit anyway? 

“When have you ever flirted with me?” A genuine question, nonetheless, not a valid one. Jeno’s flirted with you in the past. Subtly. But he has. Aways harmless. No ulterior motives. Until now. 

“You know I have. You’ve just never flirted back.” He explains casually. It's the truth and your cheeky grin accompanied by your silence validates his argument. You might be terrible at stats, but you’re not oblivious. “Do you not want me to flirt with you?” He tests.  

“I never said that.” You shrug, your nonchalance doing something to him he can’t quite describe. He feels it in his spine though, and it’s unnerving and hot at the same time.  

“So, you want me to?” He doubles down, enjoying whatever turn the conversation has taken. Your hesitation intrigues him, gaze drifting down to his lips for a split second before returning to his eyes. Jeno knows the signs. 

“Never said that either.” 

“Oh, fuck off.” His hand has no business grabbing the back of your neck and your lips have no business being this soft against his, yet both of those things are happening before Jeno can process his actions and he can’t stop the low grunt that rumbles in his chest. You kiss him back like you expected it, like you were prepared for it and that eggs him on even more.  

You shuffle closer, your hands finding home on the sides of his neck, holding him close, making his head spin as he struggles to stay sane. The low moan you let out against his lips allows him to lick into your mouth, tangling his tongue with yours, gliding, flicking, tasting you eagerly. He really shouldn’t be doing this - fuck stats, fuck tutoring - but the thought doesn’t even register.  Not when you look so good on his floor and taste even better on his tongue. He only knows that you’re here, close, and he wants more. 

He tugs on your hair, blunt nails scratching lightly at your scalp and you obediently allow your head to loll back, giving him space to attack your neck with wet kisses, your perfume invading his senses, clouding his mind as he sucks on your pulse. He smirks when you whine, the sweet sound reaching his already half hard dick. He lets his other hand travel down your body and when he reaches the inside of your thigh, he squeezes the flesh, waiting for you to protest, to stop him or indicate in any kind of way that you don’t want him to keep going. Instead, you spread your bent legs expectantly. 

No words are exchanged apart from a low ‘fuck’ he lets out when you hurriedly dip your hands under your short skirt, tugging at your panties and the second they’re on the floor, Jeno wastes no time. His fingers find your folds instantly, rubbing from your entrance to your clit and he grunts at the wet glide, so fucking wet, he thinks as he circles your bundle of nerves slowly at first, then more determined, wanting desperately to get you off. It’s like he’s possessed. He can’t think straight, the only thought dancing around his mind is seeing you fall apart on his floor. 

You bring his lips to yours again, hands pulling at his hair as your tongue invades his mouth and your hips grind against his hand. He’s in a slightly uncomfortable position, butt still on the floor, body twisted at the waist as you’re splayed on his carpet, head resting on the edge of his mattress. Not that it matters anyway. 

“Make me cum.” You moan in his mouth; demanding and breathy and he swallows it with a filthy kiss, moaning when he dips a finger in your needy hole. You’re so wet, making his mind go blank and he feels like he could give you anything you asked for at this point. He pulls out, trying two fingers this time, knowing you can take the stretch with how drenched you are.  

“Pull your skirt up.” He instructs softly, lips dragging against yours.  

You do exactly as he asks, revealing the unholy sight of his fingers slowly fucking into you. Your clit is engorged due to the arousal and he can’t shake the thought of his lips wrapping around it, sucking as hard as he pleases, flicking until you’re shaking. He settles for splitting you open with his fingers for now.  

He curls the digits slightly, pressing them upwards as he starts drilling into you at a rough and quick pace. The quelching noises sound almost melodic to him. That’s what good pussy sounds like, he thinks and he relishes in the loud mewl you let out, knowing he’s hitting the right spot.  

“There?” He breathes out against your temple, desperately needing to unbutton his jeans, the constricting feeling torturing him, but your nod keeps him going.  

“Yeah.” You pant, your eyes on his hand, taking in the erotic image as your nails dig into his thigh through his godforsaken jeans, and he wishes he could feel your touch properly, without any barriers.  

He makes sure the heel of his palm stimulates your clit each time he fucks into you and he praises the universe when your walls flutter around his fingers.  

“Oh my- fuck!” You cry out as you head tips, eyes rolling back, jaw dropping in a silent moan and Jeno feels lightheaded at the newfound, sinful image of you climaxing. Your cunt clamps down on his hand, making it impossible for him to keep thrusting, so he buries his fingers all the way in your pulsating heat and starts harshly rubbing your clit with his thumb. Your thighs start quiverig, eventually closing and trapping his hand between them, preventing him from continuing.  

Your expression resembles an angelic one as you take deep breaths, trying to resurface back to sanity. “Jesus.” You whisper, almost like a prayer and he lets out a short breathless laugh, nails scratching the back of your scalp to help you calm down as your body still trembles.  

“You good?” He bends down a little, stealing a kiss off your shoulder. The reason unknown to him, but he doesn’t question it either.  

“Mhm.” You nod lazily, turning your head to look at him and your fucked out eyes remind him of the big problem in his jeans. “I think we should fuck.” You blurt out unexpectedly and he feels his eyebrows raise in surprise. He thinks exactly the same, he just didn’t expect you to spell it out like it’s the most normal thing in the world. But then again, you’ve always been the blunt type. A woman who knows what she wants. He’ll bite.  

“Do you, now?” He purposely feigns surprise as he drags his fingers out of your now relaxed walls and doesn’t even warn you before hooking his arms underneath you; one around your middle, the other one under your bent knees. Your small yelp makes him smile and your arms coming to wrap around his neck in urgency tug at his heartstrings in a way that makes him feel dizzy. 

 He carries you for a few seconds as he walks around his bed, dropping you so your head lands on his pillows. You bounce a couple of times before sitting up, resting your weight on your palms.  

“Don’t you think that’s inappropriate?” He asks, trying to maintain a serious tone but removing his t-shirt anyway.  

“Just a tad.” You say absentmindedly, eyes shamelessly trailing down his naked torso, landing on his hands as they work his belt undone. Jeno is aware of his above average size, but your eyes slightly widening when he shoves both his jeans and boxers down, definitely do wonders to his ego.  

He kneels on the bed, shuffling until he’s situated between your already parted legs. He taps on your chin with his index to get your attention. “You’re drooling. Arms up.” He bites his lip trying to conceal a smile as you sit up properly, extending your arms above your head. “Cute.” He mumbles before dipping down to take hold of the hem of your top, dragging it up and off you, revealing your pretty tits. The lack of bra causes his brain to short circuit for a second before discarding the top somewhere behind him and he doesn’t waste time, moving to unzip your skirt. He smirks at the way you adorably raise your bum to help him remove the last piece of clothing.  

“How do you want it?” He asks, trying to sound unaffected, all the while aching to touch you all over, heart threatening to jump out of his chest. You bite your bottom lip in thought, contemplating your options.  

“Can I be on top first?” You ask tentatively, neck craning so you can look up at him. You’re so pretty like this. Splayed on his sheets with nothing on but that necklace he can’t seem to get enough of. Jeno nods in understanding, gathering that you’re most likely worried he won’t fit in any other position and he’s more than happy to let you take him however you please.  

He plops down next to you on the mattress, still sat up and you quickly follow, dragging your knees on his sheets so you can straddle him. His hands move instinctively, taking hold of your hips, pulling you closer as you slightly hesitate and the second your knees trap his hips between them and your arms wrap loosely around his neck, he allows his own to slither around your middle. Your tits brush against his chest and he has to hold back a groan at the soft sensation.  

His eyes find that necklace again and this time he can’t refrain from voicing his thoughts. “That looks good on you.” His chin points at the piece of jewellery and you look down momentarily before realising what he’s referring to.  

“Thanks. I like yours.” You pull at his plain silver chain with your fingers, bringing his face closer to yours. Your blush is back, making him feel giddy. What’s wrong with him? He can’t even blame it on the alcohol; he feels mostly sober now. 

He trails a hand up your side, palming your breast momentarily before his fingers tuck your hair behind your ear, palm coming to rest on the side of your neck, thumb tracing your jawline delicately.  

“Can I kiss you?” You ask hesitantly, your lips almost touching.  

“You can do anything you want.” He utters quietly and he sighs when you close the tiny gap, your lips moulding against his. You kiss him deep and slow - slower than he’s used to - lightly nipping at his bottom lip, a satisfied hum escaping his chest when your hands tip his head back a little, yours angling to the side so you can deepen the kiss. Your tongue obscenely glides against his, your taste invading his senses and the wet smacks of your lips turn him on even more. His cock twitches between your bodies and he moans when you push him by the shoulders, letting himself land on the pillows, dragging you with him.  

“Fuck, how are you so hot?” You whine as you trail kisses down the side of his neck and he huffs out a laugh, the compliment reaching his ears as he feels them getting warmer.  

“Have you seen yourself?” He breathes out weakly as you suck on a spot that has him reeling, his hand tangling in your hair to hold you there, giving you permission to mark him.  

“Shut up.” You murmur against the sensitive spot, your tongue soothing the scratch of your teeth.  

“Fuck you.” He retorts childishly, hands grabbing your ass, squeezing greedily, pushing you downwards as he grinds his hips up, length slipping between your puffy folds, your arousal coating him perfectly. “You’re so wet.” He moans against your shoulder as you keep sucking greedily, and Jeno is positive the spot on his neck will feel sore tomorrow.  

You sit up abruptly, eyes finding his, looking enticing as ever, pupils blown out, lips wet and swollen. You shock him when you lewdly dribble in your palm before reaching down to engulf his painfully hard cock in the very same hand. 

“Jesus.” He pants as you lather him in your spit and slick, the glide of your hand sensational. You shuffle slightly upwards, aligning him with your entrance and he helps you maintain your balance with his hands on your waist.  

“Ah, fuck.” You whine when his tip breaches your snug hole and he feels like he’s losing his mind. There’s no way a pussy can be this wet and feel this good. Your contorted expression tells him you might not be enjoying this as much as he is though, which brings him back to reality.  

“You okay?” He drops his hands to your ass cheeks, spreading them as far apart as they can go, hoping the action offers your pussy some relief.  

“It stings a bit.” The cute scrunch of your nose makes his heart race, and he has to refrain from fully thrusting into your pulsating heat. “Keep your hands there.” You plead and he does, holding you open as you try to sink down a little further with a whimper of discomfort.  

“Come here, kiss me for bit.” His words must affect you, the tightening of your walls suffocating him, but you follow through, arms wrapping securely around his neck as your lips find his again. He kisses you slow, matching your rhythm from before, tongues gliding languidly, still wet and messy, but mostly intimate. Too intimate. And he knows it’s working when your walls start relaxing around him, your cunt producing another gush of slick that drips down to his base.  

He takes matters into his own hands, hips raising to thrust into you little by little in quick, short pumps and when your mouth drops open against his, he moans, finding pleasure in pleasuring you.  

“Better?” He whispers, searching for any signs of discomfort as your eyebrows crease adorably.  

“Uh-huh.” You nod quickly, nose bumping against his as you kiss him again, all tongue and teeth, and Jeno doesn’t stop fucking you. Even when he’s fully sheathed in, he keeps going, quickly but gently pumping into your slippery warmth, length barely pulling out before sliding back in. “Fuck, you’re s-so deep.” You whine dreamily and he loves that you’re not moving, hips still, trusting him, taking what he’s giving you from underneath as his hands stay on your ass, holding your cheeks apart just like you asked him to.  

When you sit up a little, palms resting on his chest as you start meeting his thrusts, you let out a loud moan and Jeno assumes his cock is hitting exactly where it should be hitting. Your tits are bouncing beautifully, nipples hard from arousal and he wishes he had his mouth all over them, but doesn’t risk changing the angle of his hips, fucking you how you need him to. He doesn’t need your words, just your closed eyes, slack jaw and trembling breaths are enough for him to know you’re lost in pleasure.  

“Jen- f-fuck me harder.” Music to his ears.  

“Yeah? You sure?”  

“Mhm yeah, right there, just harder.” You nod quickly, eyes pleading and how could he ever deny you anything.  

“Fuck, baby.” He barely registers the pet name leaving his lips, but he knows it does something to you, pussy gripping him a little tighter than before and when his hips start smacking against yours, ass jiggling in his hands, you both moan loudly.  

“Oh, fuck, y-yes, like that.” You cry out, back arching, head tipping backwards in ecstasy and Jeno can’t find it in him to stop staring at you. There’s sweat dripping between your bouncing breasts, and all he can think is how much he wants to lap it up, how much he wants to lather your nipples in his spit and feel the weight of your pretty tits in his palms.  

“Rub your clit for me.” He requests in a frenzy, desperate to see you fall apart again. Your ring-clad fingers quickly find the swollen nub, drawing frantic circles around it and Jeno feels his balls tightening at the sight, cock throbbing as he nears his end. Your eyes find his for a split second before they roll back as you visibly start shaking, your hand quickly leaving your clit with a shriek as though the stimulation feels painful. “That’s it.” 

 He doubles down even through the kneading of your walls around him, thrusts becoming more brutal, balls slapping against your ass. He becomes desperate with the way your nails dig into his chest, his grip on your ass tightening, causing the flesh to ripple. He selfishly hopes his fingers leave bruises, reminding you tonight for days. 

He swears the obscene slapping sounds that echo, along with your loud cries of desperation, surpass the best quality porn he’s ever watched. If he could only have a recording of the incoherent blabbering leaving your mouth now, he’d happily ditch all the porn sites and just listen to that whenever he’d want to bust a nut. 

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck.” You cry out in panic, desperately trying to raise your hips, unable to handle what he’s giving you, but that just urges him to drive into you even harder, refusing to hold back now that he’s got your body spasming hard on his cock. “J-Jen- I c-can't, f-fu-”  

He wraps a secure arm around your middle, quickly manoeuvring you on your back and before you can protest, he’s slipping right back inside your warmth, his lips silencing your cries. Your arms wrap around his shoulders, nails digging into his skin as he supports his weight on one arm, hooking your leg over his elbow, fingers digging into the flesh of your thigh. His hips resume their abuse, cock driving into your spent hole repeatedly as he seeks his own release. Your pussy is still quivering around him, forcing a guttural groan out of his chest.  

“So fucking good.” He mumbles in utter bliss, your walls squeezing him just right and he accepts defeat, knowing that he can’t last much longer. “Can I cum inside?” He asks for permission, half conscious of the fact that he’s not wearing a condom. He feels helpless.  

“Yeah.” Your hands squeeze his biceps in reassurance. “Fill me up, Jen.” You whisper and he swears it’s the most erotic thing a girl has ever said to him during sex. And he’s fucked many girls. None have uttered his name like you do though.  

“Shit.” He’s panting uncontrollably, his sweat dripping on your skin, mixing with yours as your hands come to cradle his face in comfort, and he gets this strange feeling in his chest. You’re too tender. Too soft. And then you’re leaning up slightly, kissing him but it’s almost as if he’s forgotten how to use his lips, mouth hanging open against yours, releasing a deep grunt as his orgasm takes over him. His arm starts trembling, struggling to hold him up, blunt nails sinking into the flesh of your thigh as his hips stutter, pumping messily into your wet heat, hot spurts of his release painting your gummy walls, claiming you in the best way possible. He wonders if he’s entered heaven or some unknown dimension, convinced that the way your cunt is milking him is out of this world.  

When his thrusts come to a halt, length burying inside you as he releases your leg, he hears the whimper you let out, feels it against his lips and that reminds him to kiss you again. And again. And again. Until you both can’t breathe. Until his lips feel sore. Until you’re desperately pulling at his hair. Until he’s had enough of you. If that’s even possible. 

He slips out with a sharp inhale, making you mewl and you’re both looking down, taking in the sight of his now softening cock, all covered in both of your releases. He sits up a little, shamelessly staring at your pulsating hole while forcing your legs wide open. Some of his cum escapes, slowly dripping down to your ass and Jeno feels lightheaded at the sight of your pretty cunt; all puffy and swollen because of him.  

“Stop staring you creep.” You complain, playfully kicking him in the ribs as his hold on your inner thighs loosens.  

He observes you for a moment; taking in how beautifully ruined you look. Your chest flushed, sweat all over your skin, nipples still slightly erect, tits jiggling a tiny bit from your intense breathing. The blush creeps up to your neck and reaches your cheeks, lips so red and shiny one could think you have a dark shade of lip gloss on. He feels a wave of satisfaction wash over him, knowing that it’s all him; that it’s his spit covering your lips, that your skin is covered in the afterglow of the orgasms he just fucked out of you.  

“Going shy on me again?” He teases with a raise of his eyebrows, hand playfully squeezing the flesh of your thigh, before he shuffles upwards, lying next to you on his front, arm lazily draping over your middle as he tries to regulate his breathing.  

“What if I closely stared at your dick like I was examining it?” You joke, absentmindedly scratching up and down his arm. He allows his eyes to shut, the relaxing motions of your fingers causing drowsiness to take over him as he shuffles closer to you, seeking more of your warmth. 

“Go ahead, I got a pretty good dick.” He mumbles sleepily against your upper arm. You whack him lightly but that still startles him in his woozy state.  

“Can you bring me something to clean up with?” You cringe as you rub your thighs together in discomfort and he shoots up from the bed quickly, feeling bad for neglecting you. He so easily sunk into the comfort of your warmth and that scares him a little. This is just sex, right? Nothing too deep. Just sex between two people who were having a shitty night and decided to make it better. Just incredible, mind-blowing sex with the girl he tutors twice a week for extra credit. Right?  

The act of aftercare is normally something he indulges in to subtly get rid of the other person. Never intimate, just transactional. In this case, kicking you out hasn’t even crossed his mind. He realises that he wouldn’t mind if you spent the entire night or at least just stayed a little longer. But surely that’s owed to the fact that he knows you in a way. You’re not just a random girl he met and decided to fuck and chuck. You’re friends. Right? 

“Shit, yeah, one sec.” He slips out of bed and rushes to his ensuite bathroom, catching a glimpse of himself in the mirror. He looks wrecked; sweat glistening on his skin, lips swollen, the hickey on his neck visible already, dick still shiny with slick and cum. He splashes some cold water on his face and neck, allowing the cooling feeling to wake him up before cleaning himself up.  

When he re-enters the room, you’re on your side in foetal position, very clearly asleep and he can’t help the quiet chuckle that leaves him. He carefully rolls you onto your back again and you hum contentedly as he slowly drags the warm damp towel between your legs, cleaning your folds and inner thighs as gently as possible. He feels guilty when he shakes you lightly, waking you up, but he knows you’ll thank him tomorrow. 

“You gotta pee first, then we can sleep.” He whispers, careful not to pull you out of your slumber completely.  

“I um- I can go home,” You mumble, still half-asleep, clearly dreading the effort. Silly. 

“How about just the bathroom, hm?” He scoops you up bridal style again, exactly like he did before, only now you’re completely naked and your head buries in his neck, nuzzling sleepily. “I’ll drive you home tomorrow.” He reassures you and smiles when he feels your arms tighten around his neck.  

“You’re actually a sweet guy, aren’t you, Jen?” You mumble dazedly against his skin and he carefully sets you down on the toilet seat.  

“Always the tone of surprise.” He teases as he combs your hair out of your face and behind your ears. “Do your thing. I’ll be back in a sec.”  

He heads back into his room, picking up your clothes off the floor, folding them neatly on his chair before rifling through his drawers for a comfy t-shirt for you to wear. He hears the faint trickle from the bathroom and can’t help but laugh quietly. A small routine, small domesticity — nothing like him, yet it feels… right. He grabs his phone, sending Renjun three quick texts, hoping his friend is not too drunk to respond.  

Jeno: can you bring me a glass of water pls 

Jeno: in my room  

Jeno: knock.  

RJ: on it 

RJ: you ok? 

Jeno: yeh all good 

“I’m done.” Your voice floats from the bathroom, followed by a flush as he puts a clean pair of boxers on before rushing to come get you.  

“Hey, lazy bum.” He enters to find you perched exactly where he left you, elbows on your knees. “Did you wipe, or do you want me to do that for you too?” He teases and you whine sleepily, face buried in your hands.  

“I did. I promise.”  

“Good. Now arms up.” You comply without a question, and he carefully slips the t-shirt on you, warmth spreading in his chest when you sigh at the comfort of cotton, hugging your arms to yourself. You blink up at him, looking soft as ever as you make grabby hands, and his insides almost melt at the cuteness.  

Why does he feel this sudden urge to coddle you? Sure, Jeno likes looking after his friends, making sure they’re happy and healthy, but this is different. In all his sexual encounters, he’s always maintained boundaries — never lent clothes, never ensured a girl didn’t get a UTI, never carried them around. 

With you, he finds that he’s already broken most of those boundaries in one single night. And he doesn’t know why. 

He carries you back to the bed, only this time you cling onto him like a koala bear, arms and legs wrapped around him in a tight hug. He puts you down gently, tucks you in with the duvet, smoothing it over you, making sure you’re comfortable. A knock on the door makes you blink in question. 

“It’s just my housemate.” He reassures before getting up to crack the door open.  

“Here you go, sir.” Renjun presents him with a pint of water and Jeno gratefully accepts it with a smile.  

“Thanks.” He goes to shut the door again, but Renjun quickly stops him.  

“Dude, what’s going on?” A worrisome expression on his face. 

“Nothing. I’m just- I'm not alone.” Jeno points his thumb behind him, without really allowing Renjun to look inside his room. 

“Oh.” Renjun almost looks surprised, an inquisitive look taking over his face which makes Jeno feel scrutinised. His friends know him well enough to know that he doesn’t just hide girls in his room.  

“I’ll explain tomorrow.” He assures his friend, silently implying that he can’t elaborate right now. Thankfully Renjun catches on quick and turns to leave after giving him a thumbs up. Jeno doesn’t fail to give him a fond smile for respecting his privacy. It’s one of the things he loves the most about that boy; he doesn’t hover, unless he’s needed.  

Jeno takes a couple of gulps before placing the glass of water on the nightstand next to you. Your eyes are closed again and when he quietly joins you under the covers, he feels you shift next to him. He checks if your eyes are still closed and when he confirms they are, he turns off the bedside lamp, allowing the darkness to engulf both of you.  

He’s lying on his back; arm folded under his head as he contemplates the choices he’s made tonight. Your stable breathing calms him in a way, and he finds himself trying to match your rhythm. When your hand brushes against his arm, fingers curling around just above his elbow, he freezes slightly, savouring the small contact. 

“Jen?” You whisper, as if checking he’s still there with you.  

“Hm?”  

“I don’t want things to be weird.” Fuck.  

“They won’t be.” He turns toward you, voice soft, though the darkness obscures your features. 

“How do you know that?” You’re still whispering and he doesn’t know why, since you’re the only two people in the room. He matches your tone anyway.  

“I mean...” His words falter briefly as your grip tightens. “Things don’t have to be weird, right?” Your fingers loosen, but they remain there and Jeno has trouble breathing. It’s not that deep, he thinks to himself.  

“Right.” You’re not convinced; he can tell. And neither is he.  

“You’re overthinking.” No shit, Sherlock.  

Your sigh lands on his shoulder, warm and heavy. He senses you closer than he expected. “And you’re not?” 

It’s his turn to let out a sigh this time.  

“Right.” Your tone cools, as though distancing yourself slightly. Your hand remains, a tether. 

“I don’t know what to tell you, Y/N.” He sounds defeated and he wishes he could give you the reassurance you’re looking for. He can’t though. Not without lying.  

“Do you want me to leave?” Your question takes him aback. 

“What? No, that’s not what I’m saying, Y/N.” He rubs a hand over his face in exasperation.  

“Stop saying my name like that.” Your voice not a whisper anymore and that does something to his head.  

“Like what?” He provokes, tone harsher than intended.  

“Like I’m a problem you can’t be bothered to deal with.” Your words pull him under, and he pauses to recollect his thoughts. He doesn’t want to argue, but it seems you do and Jeno is confused. Did he just imagine the last hour? 

He rolls on his side to face you, and you let your hand fall from his arm. He feels the absence. “Can we please talk about this tomorrow? With clear heads?” 

You shuffle closer and his heart thuds a little faster, your knee bumping into his accidentally. “Okay.” You whisper after you’ve settled into a more comfortable position, but for some reason unbeknownst to him, Jeno senses a hesitancy in your movements. 

“You can move closer.” He smiles fondly and relief floods him when your arm wraps around his waist. He draws you in, fingers stroking the nape of your neck, tucking your head under his chin. “If you wanted to cuddle, you could’ve just said.”  

“Shh.” You scold, earning a tiny laugh from him.  

“You’re funny.” He whispers into your hair, nails softly scratching your scalp, making you shudder.  

“You’re not.” You retort, half-mumbled, and he snorts. His distress has somewhat dissolved, however the tension and confusion linger and Jeno prays that a goodnight’s sleep will fix whatever it is that broke between you and him tonight.   

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘ 

Jeno gets woken up by an involuntary twitch of his own body and when he slowly cracks his eyes open, he’s reminded that he once again forgot to roll his blinds down, allowing the morning sunlight to invade his room.  

He attempts to get into a more comfortable position, the fruity scent you carry drifts over him, and he relaxes — you’re still here, safe and real, reminding him that last night wasn’t just a fraction of his imagination. 

You’re clinging onto him; cheek squished against his chest and he’s pretty sure you’re drooling on him. He feels a laugh bubbling in his chest, but he holds it in, not wanting to wake you yet.  

The position you’re both in is slightly different to the one Jeno remembers falling asleep in. You’re using him as your pillow, your leg comfortably draped over his crotch, arm hugging his middle as though he’s your favourite teddy bear and he’s convinced that you must own one with the way you cling onto him like it’s a habit. 

He raises his sprawled arm to wrap it around you and the second his hand finds your lower back, he assumes the shirt he put on you last night must have ridden up. His fingers splay just above your ass and he’s instantly reminded of your naked bottom half. He vividly remembers picking up your underwear off the floor last night, along with the rest of your clothes.  

The thought of your nakedness brings him back to last night. Back to what you two did and how good you looked on top of him. And under him. And on his floor. His mind drifts from your smooth skin to the way you kissed him, to the way you took everything he gave you like you were made for it, like you craved it. He knows he shouldn’t. Especially when you’re soundly asleep in his arms, but Jeno has to suppress a groan at the thought of your warm and wet p- 

Your sleepy hum pulls him back to reality and he mentally presses pause on the daydreaming session, but your bent knee nudging against his half hard dick doesn’t make things easy for him. Stupid morning wood, he thinks, as if his dirty mind didn’t just cause this.  

He keeps his eyes shut, trying to think of dead puppies or his gran and it seems to be working, until your body moves, your face nuzzling in his neck, knee dragging over his crotch. The long sigh you let out against his skin, causes goosebumps to raise and he mentally curses.  

Redirecting his focus to your comfort, he allows his knuckles to trace gentle circles along your spine, and he smiles when you shudder slightly, the little tremble of your body sparking a sense of delight within him.  

“You awake?” You mumble in his neck, the tiny movement of your lips barely even there, but still enough to tickle him.   

“Just about.” His voice comes out raspy, vocal cords still half asleep, causing him to clear his throat. He subtly wiggles his hips a little further down the mattress to escape the pressure of your knee and when you move with him, clinging onto him with a whine, he can’t help but use his free hand to steady you, forcing your leg further up his torso to ease the pressure.  

“Sorry.” You whisper into his skin. “Are you uncomfortable?”  

“No.” He reassuringly squeezes your thigh, thumb gingerly caressing the surface. “You?” 

“No. Surprisingly.” If his eyes were open, Jeno would have rolled them in annoyance.  

“Yeah, cause you’re always so uncomfortable around me.” His tone full of sarcasm, but he can’t help it. If you’re going to give him attitude, you’re going to get it back. Especially this early in the day when he’s slightly hungover and has not had his morning coffee.  

“Grow up. You know what I mean.” Your humourless words contrast the way your fingers softly trace the line of his collarbone, a quiet familiarity in the gesture. 

“You thought it would be awkward?”  

“Didn’t you?” Your head moves, nose rubbing against his jaw, and he knows you’re looking at him. He adamantly keeps his eyes closed.  

“What, just cause we fucked?” The light slap he receives on his chest makes him chuckle. He’s always enjoyed getting under your skin, but for some reason, now that you’re half naked in his bed, it’s even more rewarding. “It would have been awkward only if the sex was bad.”  

You keep quiet and Jeno gives into the urge to turn his head and look at you, blinking his eyes a few times, adjusting to the sunlight. He raises his eyebrows expectantly as he dips his hand under your loose shirt, fingertips light as air, traveling up and down your spine slowly.  

“Is this you indirectly asking if I liked it or not?” Your eyebrows raise in response, mirroring his expression.  

“No, I already know you liked it. Just wanna know if it altered your brain chemistry.” He smirks at the way you roll your eyes, and if he didn’t know you to a certain extent, Jeno would really think you’re annoyed, but he recognises your usual façade.  

“Mind-blowing sex isn’t the answer to everything Lee Jeno.” Your hand engulfs his jaw, fingers squishing his cheeks and shaking his face from side to side gently. “I’m one of the very few female friends you have and you’ve already stuck your penis in me. Raw.”  

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t you very blatantly ask me to fuck you?” His pointed look gets a surrendering smile out of you, hand now settling on the side of his neck. He’s not even fazed by your proximity; noses almost touching, bodies flush against each other like you’ve done this a million times. 

“You stuck you tongue down my throat and then fingered me like nobody’s business. I’m only human.” Your bluntness makes him grin. 

“So, what’s the problem? We both wanted it, no?” He rolls to face you fully, leg fitting naturally between yours, touch grounding yet intimate. He tries his hardest to keep his attention on you, but the whimper you let out shows him you’re just as affected, and his hand has somehow fallen on your ass.  

“Why did you want it?” The question catches him off guard; your inquisitive eyes making his heart stutter.  

“I was horny. And lonely. And you looked good. I mean...You always look good, I just-” He takes a breath to compose himself. Since when does he have trouble expressing himself in front of a woman?  

“Relax, it’s not a test, I’m just genuinely curious.” Your chuckle and your fingers lightly pushing his fringe out of the way help him compose his chaotic brain just a little.  

“I dunno. I just wanted you.” He settles for honesty and if that comes to bite him in the ass later, then so be it. “That too shallow for you?” 

“No.” Your eyes travel around his face as you’re in deep thought and Jeno feels impatience creeping up on him.  

“But?” He challenges, knowing it can’t be that simple.  

“But, I don’t know if I can be normal around you now.” You purse your lips as you brush his bottom one with your thumb and he stops breathing for a second, his heart rate increasing significantly. “I don’t really do casual sex.” 

He likes your honesty. 

“When have you ever been normal around me, Y/N?” His light-hearted comment earns him a bashful smile from you, your thumb now tracing his cheekbone as he playfully gropes the part where your thigh connects to your ass. “Look, I’m not expecting anything. If you’re uncomfortable, we can go back to normal. You get your tutoring. I get my extra credit.” 

“And you’d be happy with that?” Good question.  

“I’m a big boy. If that’s what you want, then that’s what you want.” He offers a way out, but part of him hopes you don’t take it. 

“What if I don’t know what I want?” Your eyes close, a long sigh escaping through your nose. He wants nothing more than to make it easier for you. 

He smiles, conflicted. 

“Then… I dunno. I guess we figure it out.” He says it casual, like it’s nothing — but his stomach twists anyway. 

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘ 

The drive back to yours is quiet. Not uncomfortable, but definitely unusual. Neither you nor Jeno are usually this quiet around each other but now your thoughts are too loud and so are your doubts.  

You barely register the car coming to a stop, having completely spaced out. It’s Jeno’s voice that brings you back to reality.  

“Is here fine?”  

“Hm? Yeah. Here’s great. Thanks for the lift.” His eyes are already on you when you look over at him, expectant and unsure. The corner of his mouth lifts subtly, a small smile forming as a response to your gratitude. 

“I’ll see you Tuesday?” The tapping of his fingers against the wheel sounds louder that it should.  

“Yeah. Tuesday.” 

“Cool.” 

“Cool.” You repeat dumbly, not sure how to approach your next words.  

“Are y-” 

“This shouldn’t happen again.” You blurt out and the tapping stops, his eyebrows raising slightly, but other than that, he remains calm.  

“Alright.” He nods understandingly. “It won’t.” The warmth and playfulness his voice held until this morning, long gone.  

“I’m sorry.”  

“What for? You didn’t do anything wrong.” He shrugs, his fake nonchalance sitting heavy in your stomach.  

“I dunno. I feel like-” 

“Y/N.” His hand finds your shoulder, hold grounding. “We’re good. Honest.” He turns in his seat, facing you better. “People have sex all the time. It’s not that deep.” He squeezes your shoulder once, barely there but you still feel it as his neutral smile does very little to convince you. Simply because it doesn’t reach his eyes. You hate this unfamiliar side of him.  

“It’s fine if you don’t wanna tutor me anymore.” 

“I do.” There’s no hesitation in his voice, touch reassuring. 

“You sure?” 

“I am. As long as you are.” Another subtle squeeze, now on your upper arm, his hand having slid down. “Plus...I really need the extra credit.” His playfulness is back, and you can’t hold back the sheepish smile that takes over your face.  

“Okay then.” You exhale, somewhat relieved.  

“Okay then.” He repeats, light-heartedly, the warm smile now reaching his eyes as his warm hand slides further down your arm before he completely retracts. The gesture should soothe you, but it somehow unsettles you.  

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘ 

Next time you see him is indeed Tuesday. Your regular first session of the week. And it’s all fine. It’s all normal. It’s all good.  

Until it isn’t.  

Until you see a text pop up on his screen. Yuna.  

We still on for tonight? It reads and you quickly avert your eyes back on the histogram displayed on your laptop screen. Something about a survey, a sample and frequencies. It’s all a mess now. Who the fuck is Yuna? And why is she texting him? What about tonight?  

You shouldn’t care. You really shouldn’t. But then he’s quickly typing a response you can’t see and he places his phone face down. Like it never happened.  

“What’d you get?” He interrupts your ridiculous thoughts as he leans over your shoulder to take a look at the scribbles on your notepad. “Correct formula. Wrong result.” 

“What? Why?” You’re more annoyed than you should be. His raised eyebrows betray his shock at your abrupt tone.  

“You’re asking me why you can’t count?” His smirk is worth slapping off. “Check your total number of observations again.” He taps his pen on the letter n and when you count again, you realise it’s 6 instead of 5. Great. You really can’t count.  

“That’s just a silly mistake.” 

“Which will cost you a whole lot of marks.” He does this thing where he twirls the pen between his index and middle finger, and it shouldn’t be that attractive. “You see, it’s not a matter of logic with you. You just need to concentrate.” He’s enjoying this too much. His smile audible.  

“I am concentrated.” You state stubbornly.  

“Concentrate better.”  

“Fuck off.”  

His lack of response causes you to look at him. His neutral eyes and pursed lips tell you he’s not going to entertain whatever argument you’re trying to start and that agitates you even more. So does his stupid cologne. And the fact that he’s so close still. His forearm is now resting on your notepad and all you can think of is how prettily it flexed when it was between your thighs.  

“Sorry.” You sigh, slumping back into your chair, looking around the quiet café. You need air and all you keep getting is his scent. It’s not fair.  

“Am I allowed to ask?” His tone is tentative, but present.  

“Ask what?”  

“What’s bothering you.” He starts going over what you’ve written on your notepad with his pen, overlining letters and numbers, following every curve. You glance at his profile for a moment and you’re thankful he’s now focused on the page in front of you.  

“Nothing is bothering me.” You cross your arms over your chest defensively.  

“Lie better.” The corner of his lips twitches as he keeps outlining, still not looking at you. Smug bastard.  

“Is it me?” He side-eyes you for a split second, gaze meeting yours before dropping back down to the mistaken 5 you wrote down earlier. It’s like an insult. 

“That’s awfully egotistical of you.” You challenge, making him struggle to hold back his smile. “What makes you think that?” 

He shrugs. “Just a hunch.”  

You lean over, elbow on the table, chin resting on your palm, closer now. “Not everything is about you, Jeno.” You say as calmly as possible.  

His pen comes to a halt. Eyes catching yours without backing down now.  

“As if you don’t think about me 24/7.” It’s a joke, but it’s not.  

“Is that what you tell yourself?” You shouldn’t give into it. Into his flirting. But he makes it almost impossible to behave.  

“Is it bad if I do?”  

“Not bad. You’re just wrong.”  

“Like your calculations.”  

“What?”  

“Solve it again. No calculator. Not like it helped you the first time anyway.” He leans back in his chair with an unbothered expression, pen dropping dismissively on your notepad as he resembles your stance, arms crossing over his buff chest. “Go on, I don’t have all day.” He points his chin to the page smugly. Did he just...play you? 

“Prick.”  

“Mhm.” 

Is this what it’s going to be like from now on? If so, then you’re astronomically fucked.  

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘ 

Two weeks go by. Four tutoring sessions with Jeno — all pure torture. But somehow, focusing on the calculations and formulas actually pays off. You don’t ask as many questions anymore, you get the correct results most of the time, and you even score 76% on the mock test Jeno printed out for you. 

A glimmer of surprise flashes across his face when he finishes grading, but it quickly softens into something pleased. Proud, almost.  

“Nice one,” he says, head bobbing in approval. “Let’s get to 80 next time.” 

You like that look on him. Like that he’s proud of you. You wish you could see it more often. 

But the wish evaporates the second you lay eyes on him tonight. Regret floods you for giving in to Mark’s pleas to come to this stupid party. As if the man needs a wingman — he always does fine on his own. And so does Jeno, by the looks of it. But you already knew that. So why does your chest tighten when you see a girl standing between his spread legs, his casual perch on the kitchen counter, plastic cup in one hand, the other tucked in his hoodie pocket? 

He’s not touching her, but her hands are on his thighs, and even from behind her head, you see his face clearly. Smirking, dark eyes checking her out as he sips his drink. There’s no trace of innocence in the way he’s looking at her. It’s the same way he looked at you that night in his room. 

You know you’re out of bounds. Yet jealousy gnaws at you, and you hate yourself for it. It shouldn’t affect you. You rejected him — or whatever that was. He should be the one pining, not you. But he’s fine, and here you are, still haunted by how warm and safe his body felt that morning. 

It’s unfair. 

Unfair in every way: the way he doesn’t spare you a glance, the way his eyes are fixed on her, the way he chuckles at whatever she says, the way he looks so good even while flirting with someone else. 

Hood up, fringe falling messily over his eyes. He looks soft but dangerous at the same time. Effortless. Sleeves pushed up, baggy cargos that only he can pull off. He’s hotter than ever — and she’s touching him. Not you. He’s looking at her. Not you. Laughing with her. Not you. Not you. Not you. 

“Dude, you’re staring.” Mark steps in, blocking your view of the kitchen and yanking you out of your trance. You groan, hiding your face in your hands. Maybe you’re being dramatic — but Mark won’t judge. He knows. “That bad, huh?” 

“Shut the fuck up.” You mumble into your palms, relaxing slightly as Mark wraps his arms around your shoulders, burying your face in his chest and lightly swaying you from side to side. 

“Awh c’mon… you’re good.” Mark shakes you playfully, helping your shoulders loosen. “It’s okay to be jealous.” He lowers his voice so only you can hear him. 

“This is not helping you with the babes, I’m sorry.” You wrap your arms around his waist, enjoying the comfort of your friend’s embrace — and you really shouldn’t — but you sneak a glance over his shoulder. Jeno is still there, the girl still perched between his legs, still talking. But his eyes are very clearly on you. Expression neutral, as always, never giving anything away. Yet if you were to guess, he looks conflicted — maybe a little annoyed. 

Fuck this. You refuse to stare, burying your face deeper into Mark’s neck instead. 

“Are you two planning on fucking tonight?” A boyish voice interrupts the moment. Pulling back, you see a boy standing next to you. You recognise him — always with Jeno or some girl you’d assume is his girlfriend. And he’s in your stupid stats class, too. 

“Dude, have some decorum.” Mark protests, keeping one arm around your shoulders, shaking you playfully. “Y/N, this is Haechan. Haechan, this is Y/N.” 

“Hi, Y/N. I’ve heard a lot about you.” Weird, you decide. 

“Umm I don’t think I—” 

“No time for that. Beer pong. Me and my girl versus you two. In or out?” Haechan cuts you off, no hesitation. As much as his energy overwhelms you, a game that involves alcohol sounds like a perfect distraction. 

Mark looks over at you questioningly. 

“In.” 

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘ 

Easy. That’s what beating Haechan and his girlfriend was. Too easy. And you’re currently obliterating Chenle and this boy, Renjun, who you’re pretty sure is Jeno’s housemate. 

You make the last shot. In. Some boys around the table cheer, some point fingers at the losing team, laughing at them. 

“Let’s fucking go!” Mark grabs your shoulders from behind, shaking you and you can’t help but laugh at his dramatics. 

“You just got lucky.” Haechan complains loudly. 

“You can’t get lucky twice.” You point out as you rearrange the cups back to a perfect pyramid shape. 

“You’re just a sore loser, dude.” Mark throws the ping pong ball at the weird boy, sticking his tongue out and Haechan looks like he’s had an epiphany. 

“Maybe you should play against our champions.” He says with a glint of mischief written all over his face. 

“Nah, I’m-” 

“Someone get Jeno and Jaemin.” Haechan interrupts you for the second time tonight and now he’s seriously starting to annoy you. 

“Someone else can take my spot.” You say nonchalantly as you place the last cup at the top of the pyramid. 

“Oh, grow up.” Haechan challenges again. 

“Get off my back. Respectfully.” 

“Didn’t think you’d be boring. Respectfully.” He’s hinting at something you can’t quite decipher, but somehow you know Jeno has something to do with it. 

“The fuck is that supposed to mean?” You raise your voice a few decibels as you step closer to the annoying boy. 

“I’m just saying.” He shrugs, like his words didn’t hold some cryptic meaning. 

“Care to elaborate?” You stand in front of him, arms crossing over your chest expectantly, eyebrow raising and he smirks. As though getting on your nerves is his newfound hobby. Seriously, what is this dude’s problem? 

“Oh, you know, just that you’re a-” 

“Yooo okay, let’s break it off.” Jeno’s voice cuts in before his friend can finish his sentence and suddenly, you’re being dragged away from the scene and the people that have gathered around without you noticing. You try to stand your ground, pulling away from the hand around your elbow and before you can approach smug Haechan again, Jeno stands in front of you. 

“Walk away. Right now. Please.” His expression is unreadable, but he’s definitely not pleased. You can figure that much out. 

“What’s it to you?” You challenge, suspicious of his involvement. 

His eyes close for a second, jaw clenching, as though he’s collecting himself and Haechan’s voice cuts through again. “Yeah, Jen-Jen, what’s it to you?” 

Jeno just steps closer to you, shielding you from his friend’s antics and before you have time to react, he’s dragging you away again. Hand tight around your wrist and you let him. Not before you look back, only to find Haechan wiggling his fingers at you in a playful wave and you can’t help but flip him off. His laugh is loud and if it weren’t for Jeno, the alcohol in your system would have prompted you to start a fight. How can someone be so irritating? 

Once you’re out in the back garden, you force your arm out of Jeno’s hold.  

“Chill.” His instruction makes your blood boil. 

“What the fuck!” You shout loud enough to get some heads turning, interrupting their smoking sessions. Jeno just chuckles, index and thumb pinching the bridge of his nose. “What’s so funny?” You’re quieter now but you make sure to keep the cold tone on. 

“Are you a child?” He asks with an amused smile as he leans his weight against the wall and if you weren’t so pissed off, you’d swoon at how good he looks right now. 

“He started it.” 

“Yeah, well, he’s a child.” Jeno points out like it’s a fact you should be aware of. His hands are in the pockets of his hoodie and you realise how chilly it actually is. 

“I’m assuming he knows me as the slut who slept with his friend just to get over her ex.” You move to lean against the wall next to him and he snorts at your comment. 

“You know I don’t slut shame.” He says casually, his breath visible in the cold air. “Besides, is that what that was?” He’s looking down at his shoes as he kicks some pebbles into the grass. “Rebound sex?” 

“You know it wasn’t.” 

“So, why do you care about what Haechan thinks?” 

“Cause he’s your friend.” 

“He’s also a wind up.” Jeno turns his head to look down at you. “And you let him get to you.” 

“He’s fucking annoying is what he is.” You scan the garden as you rest your hands behind your back, preventing the concrete from digging into your ass. 

“Yeah, he’s for the thick skinned.” He says it with fondness, and it baffles you. “His girlfriend tolerates him just fine, so he must be doing something right.” 

“An unsolvable mystery.” You mumble and Jeno chuckles, though you weren’t really joking. 

There’s a pause. A comfortable silence between you, which in that moment you really appreciate. 

“Didn’t know you were that good at beer pong.” Jeno elbows your side playfully and you almost smile, but then you remember that the only reason you decided to play was to distract yourself from him and the girl who was feeling him up. 

“Surprised you even saw that.” It’s meant to be teasing, light-hearted. It’s anything but that. 

“Why’s that?” His tone is devoid of any playfulness now. 

“You just looked...busy.” You refuse to look at him but you feel his stare on your side profile. You feel hot all of a sudden. Why can’t you just keep your mouth shut? 

“So?” 

“So, nothing. Just an observation.” You try your best to stay calm, but your pulse has increased significantly and you feel like throwing up. Jeno’s scoff is difficult to ignore. 

“I don’t get you, Y/N.” You’re still adamantly looking anywhere else but at him, but you can imagine his expression. He’s definitely doing that thing he does with his eyebrows when he’s confused. The one that makes him look like a puppy. And you hate yourself. “Why do you care?” 

“I don’t.” You defend quickly. 

“Right.” 

“What do you want from me, Jeno?” You close your eyes in exasperation. 

“No. What do you want?” He moves to stand in front of you now, giving you no option but to look at him. “You fucking rejected me. You don’t get to be jealous. So why am in the wrong here?” 

God, you’re such an idiot. 

“What exactly did I reject?” 

“What?” Genuine confusion painted all over his face. 

“What did you expect? That we’d keep fucking and live happily ever after? I’m sorry, I don’t do that shit. I can’t.” Words leave before thought; regret floods instantly. You expect him to argue back, to shout, to react, but his next words hurt you even more. 

“Yeah, no, I’m not doing this.” He shakes his head in disbelief, a bitter laugh escaping. 

“Not doing what?” 

“I’m not gonna argue with you, when you’ve already come to your conclusions.” 

“So, I’m wrong then? Did you want a relationship with me? Did you wanna take me to bruch? Buy me flowers? Introduce me to your parents?” Silence. “You said it yourself. You were horny and I happened to be there. A girl doesn’t give you what you want and you act like your heart is broken. Boo-hoo, wah-wah, grow the fuck up.” 

For the first time in the four months you’ve known the boy in front of you, his face is not stoic. He looks enraged, disgusted even. “You’re a fucking joke, Y/N.” 

You don’t even know what can beat that. He’s right. 

He steps closer and you wish you weren’t backed up against the wall. He’s too close. “I don’t know who fucking hurt you, and I don’t give a shit quite frankly. What I do know is I’m not a punching bag and I don’t like games.” 

“I’m not playing a game.” 

“No?” His head tilts. 

“No.” Your voice comes out weak. He’s suffocating you and you can feel the tears welling up in your eyes. Your stomach heavy. 

“You say you don’t want me. Then you flirt with me every chance you get. You get moody whenever a girl’s name pops up on my phone. You hate when my attention isn’t on you. You get jealous. You make petty comments. You can’t even look at me right now. Should I go on?” 

Are you really that obvious? If you had balls, he’d have you by them. 

“I might fuck around, but at least I’m honest about what I want.” His index and middle finger poke you on the chest, right in the middle and he might as well carve your heart out at this point. “You’re the game player here. Not me.” He says quietly, but the words echo loudly in your head. 

You blink and there’s wetness dripping down your cheek and the only thing you can do is nod, eyes avoiding his again, the stamp on his hoodie a lot more interesting, but blurry as another tear escapes. It’s not sadness. It’s anger. You’re angry with yourself mostly, but also him. Because he confuses you. Because he makes you feel vulnerable. Because he makes your heart do things it shouldn’t. And he scares you. So much. The way he grounds you scares you. The way he always talks sense scares you. The way he understands you scares you. The way he sees you...it scares you. 

“Why are you crying?” There’s no malice laced with his words, just worry. A genuine question. Whispered. 

“I wanna go home.” If misery could be pictured, it would be you. You sound like a spoilt child that didn’t get their favourite toy on Christmas day. 

“Okay.” He doesn’t move and neither do you. You can feel his eyes on your face and you can’t help but look into them when his thumb wipes the tears off your cheek. His palm feels warm on your cold skin, soothing your heart and you wish you could bury your whole being in it. You just hide your face in it for now. 

“I don’t like you when you’re mean.” You sniffle a little, half aware that he’s stepped closer now. His familiar clean scent engulfs you and you sigh in contentment. Your hands instinctively grab onto each side of his hoodie pocket and when you look up at him, you can tell he’s trying to fight off a smile. His features are on the softer side again, puppy-like. The fairy lights reflect on his eyes, illuminating tiny little star-like specks. 

“Don’t make me act mean then.” His fingers brush a strand of hair behind your ear. Your pride wants you to push him away, but for some reason you let him touch you. You also let your forehead rest on his sternum, and you let his arms wrap around your shoulders, hugging you into him, into his warmth. The embrace is very similar to the one Mark gave you earlier, but so different in so many ways. It calms you like no other hug ever could. Like no one could ever compare. And maybe no one can. 

“Are you still mad?” Your question is muffled by the fabric of his jumper, cheek squished against his chest, eyes closed as you bask in the proximity. 

“Mhm.” He answers a little too quickly for your liking, but his arms tighten a little more around you and you can’t fight off the tiny smile that threatens to take over your face. 

“Do you still like me?” You feel him tense just then and your arms wrap around his middle in fear of him pulling away. 

“I mean...” You feel his chest move as he exhales loudly, his chin rests on your head. “I don’t hate you.” 

“Good.” 

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘ 

It’s two days later that you decide to face the problem that is Lee Jeno. A normal late Sunday afternoon. You’ve done your shopping for the week, gone over some lecture notes, caught up on all your uni emails, procrastinated, even gone on a run to convince yourself that you didn’t just sit around all day. You send the text before you can talk yourself out of it, and when 15 minutes go by without a response, you start to regret it. 

Are you busy tonight? 

The screen laughs in your face each time you check your phone and see no new notification. Why did you decide to act brave tonight? Why are you so stupid? Of course he’s busy. He’s probably in bed with that Yuna girl, altering her brain chemistry like he did yours. You wonder if he cuddles all the girls he sleeps with like he cuddled you. All careful and possessive. 

You’re about to change into your pyjamas when you hear it. 

Ding. 

Jeno: just got back from the gym  Jeno: need a shower and then i can be free  Jeno: how come? 

Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. Do you reply now, or should you give it some time? Make him wait like he made you wait? NO. No games. He said it himself. 

You: come to mine?  You: gigi and mark are out  You: we can talk  You: you want  You: *if 

Your fingers are shaking so much you forgo typing a whole word and you can only hope he’s not laughing at you when you send the correction. Five long minutes go by before he replies again. 

Jeno: i want  Jeno: gimme 30 mins 

You snort at the text mocking your typo. Of course he won’t pass an opportunity to tease you. He definitely knows you’re shitting bricks. 

You react with a thumbs up before you start pacing around your apartment, looking for things to do until he arrives. 

First you wash up the few forgotten mugs in the kitchen sink. Then you reorganise the cereal boxes that Giselle and Mark always mess up. 

He texts you a simple omw when you’re contemplating whether you should put on jeans or keep your joggers on. You decide on the latter. No need to try hard. 

He knocks when you’ve just finished brushing your teeth for the second consecutive time, which you’re starting to regret because your gums sting now. 

You take a deep breath before opening the door and when you do, he’s standing right there, hands in his pockets, looking effortlessly cool as ever. His signature look. Attire matches yours: big hoodie and baggy joggers, emitting comfort and softness. 

His eyes scan you like yours scan him. Head to toe. “Cute socks.” He nods in approval and when you look down at your feet, you realise you’re wearing fuzzy Christmas socks with little mistletoes on them. Great. “Swear Christmas was like a month ago.” 

“They’re warm.” You step aside to let him in, and he quickly takes his shoes and jacket off by the door before trailing toward the living room area. You observe him as he carefully places his thick jacket on the back of the sofa. He inspects the room like he’s never been in your apartment before. It feels oddly domestic when he’s not here for a tutoring session. 

You set your phone on silent and quickly notice the time. Apart from the fact that he’s five minutes early, it dawns on you that it’s dinner time. 

“You hungry?” The words slip before you can stop them, and he swiftly turns around to look at you. You’re still leaning against the door as he plops down on the sofa armrest. 

“I could eat.” He shrugs with a lopsided smile. He looks so boyfriend-coded like this. So warm and soft. Just lounging around your living room. “Unless you’re cooking.” His eyes are full of mischief, smile cheeky. 

“I mean, I was thinking of ordering, but you can starve if you’re gonna insult me in my own home.” 

He ends up placing the order. Something about a deal on his Deliveroo, but you know he just didn’t want you paying. Just like when he never lets you pay for your coffee but complains when you occasionally pay for his. 

He’s munching on a dumpling when you’ve run out of things to talk about. You’ve covered the hangover you were both nursing the day before, his gym session and how he got hit on by a guy, your running session and how you got drenched by the rain, the stats chapter you’ll be entering next week, the fact that you both have a seminar tomorrow morning, the fact that you might skip. You talk about anything and everything but what you both really want to talk about. 

“Did you stay long on Friday after I left?” You ask casually as you blow on your spring roll to help cool it down. 

He shakes his head. “Nah. You left at the right time. It was dead after.” He drops his chopsticks on his plate and grabs a napkin for his hands. 

“What about the girl you were with?” It slips. But at least it doesn’t sound malicious. Your eyes meet for half a second and you almost laugh at the side-eye he gives you. 

“Still not over that?” He leans back on the sofa, getting more comfortable, legs spreading a little as he sips on his water. 

“It’s just a question. Don’t deep it.” You take a sip of your own water before turning your body completely toward him, legs criss-crossing, arm resting on the back of the sofa. 

He pulls his hood up as he slides a little further down the cushions, almost as though you’ve put him on the spot and he’s trying to hide. You find it amusing. “Nothing happened if that’s what you’re asking.” No glance toward you still; he’s too busy trying to stabilize the half-empty water bottle on his stomach and only when he fails for the third time does he look at you. 

“Why?” 

He shrugs. “Wasn’t really my type.” 

You nod. “Didn’t realize you had one of those.” You twirl one of your rings with your thumb. You feel nervous suddenly but choose to push your sarcasm forward. 

He blinks, unamused. “Is this what you wanted to talk about?” 

“I judged you.” You say quickly, refusing to back down now. His eyebrows tense a little, emitting confusion for just a second. “And I’m sorry.” You chew on the inside of your cheek as you wait for a response. 

He nods just once before averting his attention to the bottle again. “You’re not the first or the last person to do that.” 

“I have trouble seeing the good in people.” You avert your eyes to the loose thread on your sleeve. It’s difficult staying afloat when he looks at you the way he always does. Like you’re easy to read. 

“Yeah, I gathered that.” You detect a smile in his tone and you hate that you don’t have to see it to know it’s there. You expect him to ask why. He doesn’t; you sense his contemplative eyes on you still. A beat of silence passes and you find yourself trapped in it, struggling to utter more words. He helps with the worst possible question. “Why did you sleep with me, Y/N?” 

“Don’t say it like that.” You let out a humourless laugh. 

“Like what?” There’s expectancy in his voice. His restraint is slowly breaking. 

“Like I lured you in or something.” You pull the loose thread harder. He lets out a short laugh. It sounds accidental. 

“Just answer the question.” He taps on the plastic bottle as if to get your attention. “And look at me.” His eyebrows lift momentarily when you do, like a greeting. The situation seems awfully comical—or maybe it’s the fact that you struggle to stay serious in serious situations. He mirrors your barely-there smile regardless. 

“There’s not just a single reason.” You can’t be more honest than that. 

“Okay, so name three.” He holds his thumb, index, and middle finger up, wiggling them as he waits for you to start listing. “Go on.” He nods when he senses your hesitation. 

You sigh dramatically as you look around the room, like the answers are hidden in the furniture. “I guess you’re attractive.” 

“That doesn’t count. I want profound stuff.” 

You scoff. “Since when?” You raise an eyebrow and his pointed look makes you back down, his three fingers waving slightly, demanding. 

“You made me feel comfortable.” 

Middle finger down. 

“I was intrigued.” 

Pointer down. He nods again when you pause for too long. It takes everything not to look down, but you don’t. 

“Felt right.” 

“And now it doesn’t?” He’s quick. No hesitation. No whys and hows. He sits up and turns to look at you properly, mirroring your position. One arm drapes over the back of the sofa while the other holds onto the water bottle still, one leg folded under him, the other hanging off the sofa. You like that he’s comfortable in your vicinity; it calms the turmoil inside you. 

“It does. It’s just confusing.” You admit. His eyes look more alive now. 

“What’s so confusing? People fancy each other. They fuck. They either make it a thing or they don’t.” For someone who normally reads you in no time, he seems to be struggling now. 

“Jen, this isn’t stats. It’s not that simple.” You smile fondly at his confusion. “Besides, what exactly is this thing we could make it into?” You can almost see the gears spinning in his head. This, he doesn’t seem to have an answer for. 

“This might sound wild, but I happen to know what dating is.” His widened eyes evoke a laugh out of you. Maybe he did have an answer after all. 

“You wanna date me.” You deliver the question in deadpan tone. 

He tilts his head a little. “Would that be so terrible?” 

You purse your lips in thought. Would it? “Do you understand what that entails?” God, you sound so condescending. Like a middle-aged person. 

“God forbid we go somewhere other than a café and talk about something other than stats.” The sarcasm in his voice makes you roll your eyes. Mostly because it makes him sound hot. You almost flinch when he shuffles closer, his knee touching yours. He drops the bottle he’s been fiddling with somewhere behind him and his fingers find yours in a heartbeat. Like he didn’t even think about it. Like it’s reflex. 

“That’s not what I mean.” You know he knows, but you say it anyway. Your eyes find your hand in his, thumb stroking your knuckles gently before gliding over a ring, finding a new toy to fiddle with. 

“I’ll be good to you.” You bring your gaze to his face. He looks almost shy, eyes on your hands and if the lighting were stronger, you might have been able to spot the blush on his cheeks better. You imagine it for now. “I don’t expect you to trust me from the get-go.” He chews on his bottom lip for a second. “But maybe— you know—maybe eventually...” He looks up, scanning your face for a reaction, which you try tremendously hard not to give because you just happen to love a pathetic man. He’s unsure, but he’s trying. You’ll give him that. 

“Ask me properly.” You squeeze his fingers once and he has the cutest look of hope on his face. 

“You’re going on a date with me.” 

“I said ask—” 

“I’m telling you.” He tugs on your arm playfully and you can’t help but gleam at his unusually playful antics. 

“Alright.” 

“Cool.” 

“Now get out of my house.” 

“Sorry?” Genuine surprise takes over his features; eyebrows furrowed to the maximum, eyes wide. 

“You’re not staying the night.” You pat his thigh as you get up and start picking up the takeout boxes lying scattered on your coffee table. 

“Why not?” He sounds almost offended. You laugh quietly as you walk into the kitchen. 

“You’re just not.” He hasn’t moved from his spot on the sofa when you look back at him. 

“I won’t try anything.” 

Your pointed look forces the corners of his mouth to curl into a mischievous smile. “I’ll just cuddle you.” 

“Next joke.” 

“You really think I’m not capable of keeping it in my pants?” You don’t even bother responding to his silly question. 

When you approach him again, you stand in front of him and with the way he looks up at you, it takes a lot to not just get on your knees for him. 

“It’s not you I’m worried about.” You admit, hinting at something he catches on quickly, his pleased smile difficult to miss. 

He moves closer, warm hands engulfing the backs of your knees, his hood dropping as he cranes his neck to gaze up at you with pretty eyes. He looks almost innocent like this. So handsome. “At least give me a kiss.” 

Your hands come to rest on his shoulders, looking for support as he pulls you closer, between his spread legs. This screams anything but innocent, and the way he nuzzles his face against your tummy has your breath hitching. You bury a hand in his hair, nails lightly scratching as he breathes you in. 

“Just one, yeah?” Your quiet offer makes him look up again, eyes finding yours in an instant, chin resting on your lower abdomen. Who knew Lee Jeno could look so submissive and sexy at the same time. 

“Just one. And I’ll fuck off before you know it.” You should tease him. Make him beg. But he looks too good for that. Too insatiable. And you can always make him beg another day. 

You do exactly what you said you wouldn’t do. You get on your knees, between his spread ones, and now it’s you that has to look up at him. Your hands find his strong thighs and the thought that enters your mind isn’t a pleasant one. Envy flickers for a moment, remembering the girl from two nights ago, standing between his legs in a very similar position. But then you see how he looks at you and envy becomes want. He didn’t look at her like that, nowhere near. 

His hands fall on top of yours before trailing up your arms and you drag your knees across the carpet to get closer. Your noses touch when his palms engulf each side of your neck, thumbs tracing your jawline, fingers reaching your nape, his touch making your knees feel weak as your heart beats faster, and you’re worried he can feel it through your pulse points. 

“You know,” His top lip grazes your bottom one lightly and you can’t help but bite onto the spot he touched. “You’re doing a bit too much for just one kiss.” 

“You either want it, or you don’t.” You match his low tone; afraid you’ll break the trance you both seem to be in, your fingers lightly squeezing his thigh muscles in encouragement. 

You see his smirk and then you don’t. Your eyes drop shut the second his mouth is on yours, claiming. His palms feel warm on your cheeks, his lips soft on yours but demanding, thighs tensing under your wandering hands, and you feel dizzy as you let him tilt your head as he pleases, let his tongue in your mouth, let him taste you. It’s wet and it’s loud and it’s hot, the neurons in your brain already useless. 

You really should pull away, not give in to him so easily, but one hand is in your hair now, tugging, the other around your throat, gentle but assertive, and the whimper you let out is embarrassing. Your hands clench around the fabric of his joggers; your pussy around nothing, and that’s when you abruptly push him away, hands on his firm chest. You think your ears deceive you, but you swear Lee Jeno just whined. A needy, pathetic whine. So beautiful. It makes something coil in your chest, a pulse of heat you didn’t expect, a reminder of just how much power he has over you in a single sound. 

His back is against the sofa cushions now, and he looks defeated, chest visibly moving. “You’re a fucking menace.” 

You laugh a little too loudly at how out of breath he sounds, as though he didn’t just have full control of that kiss. His lips are shiny, a darker shade of their usual pink, and you lick at yours, realizing they must be just as wet. You can still taste him, and your walls flutter around emptiness again. You’re tempted to look down and check whether he’s also affected, but you withhold. That would make things so much worse. 

“I promised one kiss. I gave it to you.” You pat his thighs gently, and his hands catch yours again, fingers interlocking this time. It’s your heart that flutters this time. 

“Alright, Dua Lipa.” 

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘ 

Jeno has always known you’re trouble. He’s always pitied the guy you’ll end up with—or anyone who falls for you. Not because you’re not a catch, but because he views you as someone hard to say no to. And now… he’s exactly the kind of guy he pities. He’s never thought of himself as a weak man. But here he is, walking you home after your regular Tuesday session, pretending he’s listening to your rant about some professor who hates you and struggling not to make his fascination obvious. Because he really is fascinated—by the way you move your hands, the way you furrow your eyebrows in frustration, the way you swear a little too much when you’re stressed, and the way you say “what the fuck,” because what the fuck is wrong with him? 

He can’t stop thinking about how adorable you looked earlier when you drew a Venn diagram correctly, how your eyes lit up when you got his validation, how you gasped when the only thing he said was “good job.” Not because he has some weird claim on you, but because he likes how determined you are to do well. And he likes that he’s helping you. But most of all, he likes that you’re succeeding. Jeno is positive you don’t even need his help to pass the module anymore, but he can’t bring himself to tell you that just yet—simply because he likes that you want his help. 

It’s been two days since that obliterating kiss, and Jeno keeps pondering. You. How you got on your knees. How you touched him. How you sounded. How easily you ruined him with just one kiss. He knows he’s already slept with you, but for some reason, that kiss beats any other moment he’s had with you. It was too good. Too much. And oh, what he would give to experience that again. 

“You free this Friday?” The question slips mid-thought, and the silence that follows makes him turn his head to look at you. He struggles not to laugh at your dumbfounded expression, pursing his lips to control the smile that threatens to take over his face. 

“You weren’t listening just now, were you?” You scold, though the tone of amusement is still evident. 

“Nah. Not really.” He blatantly admits, getting a kick out of annoying you. 

“Dickhead.” You huff in the cutest way possible. 

“Friday.” He repeats stubbornly as you’re nearing your building. “Free or not?” 

“What exactly am I walking into here?” You ask carefully, eyes narrowing in suspicion. 

“An orgy.” 

“Yeah, alright, get me involved.” Your bored tone shouldn’t make him smile. 

He sighs in annoyance, because there’s no way you don’t know what he’s hinting at. “I wanna take you out, you pleb.” 

“Pleb?” 

He groans dramatically. “Oh my god—” 

“I’m actually not.” 

“What?” 

“I’m not free on Friday. I promised Gigi I’d do movie night.” No way. Fuck that. There’s no way he’s asking you out and you’re rejecting him. 

“You serious? You’re blowing me off for some movie night?” He knows he should tone it down. He’s sounding hurt, and it’s not that deep. It shouldn’t be. 

“I’m not blowing you off—” 

“You so are. Royally.” He can’t help but feel a little defeated. He’s never winning with you. 

“I can do Saturday.” You say with a hopeful tone, and Jeno feels some relief at the fact that you’re not entirely rejecting him. 

“I said I’d go to this stupid party on Saturday.” He grumbles. He doesn’t even want to go, but you’re not willing to cancel your plans for him. So why should he? 

“Right, well… we’ll have to do next week then.” The disappointment in your voice makes his heart jump and his stomach clench. Why do you keep doing that? Until now, it was his head. Now, you’re messing with his heart and stomach too? It’s unfair. 

“Why don’t you come with me?” He offers, hoping it doesn’t make him seem weak. Although he knows that’s exactly what he is—a weak, needy, pathetic man. For you. 

“To your stupid party?” You almost sound offended, and now he regrets even asking. 

“Yeah.” He sighs as you both come to a halt outside your building. It’s dark already, and the streetlights reflect prettily on your face, accentuating your features. Your nose is a little red from the cold, and you’re in thought, teeth catching your bottom lip as you consider his invitation. 

“That’s not really taking me out though, is it?” You try shyly. You never tiptoe around things. And Jeno hates that he loves that. 

“I just want to spend time with you, Y/N.” He attempts to lower his guard a little but realizes how awfully intimate his words sound. Oh well. “We can show face for a bit, and then we can just fuck off if it’s boring, go somewhere else.” 

“Where?” 

“Disneyland.” He deadpans again, trying to put on the fakest smile he can, but unintentionally, it transforms into a genuine one. He blames the cute way you roll your eyes at him. So unamused. 

“Wow, you’re on a roll today. How will I ever recover from this laughter?” You sound bored, but he sees how hard you’re trying to hold back your smile. 

“God, you’re annoying.” And he’s not lying. You are so fucking annoying. And so fucking pretty. He blames the streetlights. And his stupid heart. 

You outright laugh at his exasperation, and Jeno finds himself in a predicament. He could ignore you, move on with the conversation, or he could shut you up. It’s an easy decision. 

The cute sound of surprise you let out when his lips crash onto yours is imprinted on his brain, and so is your soft touch on his chest, and so is the way you kiss him back, matching his eagerness, and so is your taste, and so is the way your body molds into his. It all just fits perfectly. You fit perfectly. 

Your nose feels cold against his cheek, but the back of your neck feels hot against his frosty fingers, and he wonders when it became such a normal thing for him to notice details like that. A kiss is a kiss. There shouldn’t be any science behind it. That’s what he always thought. Until that night you sat with him on the carpet at the foot of his bed. 

A wet smooching sound echoes in the cold of the evening when he pulls away, and he can’t fight his smile seeing how you lean closer, chasing after his lips. 

“Come.” He whispers, both your breaths visible. 

“Huh?” You sound lost, blinking quickly as though adjusting back to reality. Did he just kiss you, stupid? 

“On Saturday. Come with me.” He sounds like he’s begging now, and he hates it. That’s what it’s come to. 

He trails his hands down your arms, over your thick jacket, and the bashful expression on your face makes his pulse fasten as he threads his fingers through yours. 

“Okay. I’ll come.” Success. 

“Good.” He leans down, leaving another chaste kiss on your lips before he can chicken out, and then, as you’re about to speak, he’s walking away. 

“Dude, what th—” 

“You better have that mock test ready for Thursday!” He shouts over his shoulder, and he wishes his resolve was stronger, but he can’t fight the need to look back. And the confusion on your cute face is so worth it. 

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘ 

Jeno doesn’t know what to do with himself. 

There you are. A few feet away from him, in this crowded space, conversing with some girls he’s never met before. So confident, carrying yourself so gracefully, your laugh audible and sweet. So sweet, so intoxicating, so heart-wrenching. 

He brought you here. And for some reason, he expected you to not leave his side; to crowd him, to be needy and demand his attention. As always, he was mistaken. He should know by now, you’re not like most girls he’s associated himself with. But he’s a fool. A fool who keeps misjudging you and putting you in the same basket as everyone else. 

And there you always are. Proving him wrong every single time. 

“What’s with the long face?” Haechan’s voice cuts through Jeno’s trail of thought. 

“No long face.” Jeno quickly dismisses the accusation. “Just thinking.” 

“Thinking at a party? You must be in serious trouble.” As much of a smart-ass as his friend can be, he’s got the tendency of being right most of the time. And just like now, he’s always smug about it, the irritating smirk on his face proof. 

“Fuck off.” Jeno mutters, always harmless. “Don’t you have a girlfriend to bless with your annoying-ass face?” 

“And bless her I shall.” Haechan sings, making Jeno snort at his silliness. “Quit yearning and just go talk to her, you dumb-ass bitch. You look like you’ve seen a litter of dead puppies.” Haechan whispers aggressively as he walks away swiftly, before Jeno can have the pleasure of shoving him. 

“Wet wipe.” Jeno curses under his breath as he watches his friend lovingly wrap his arms around his girlfriend, his face nuzzling into her neck as she smiles bright. It’s sweet and it’s disgusting, and the undeniable feeling of envy fills Jeno. He’s envious of them both. Because as disgusting as they can be, they’re happy. And they don’t fail to remind him every fucking second. 

When Jeno redirects his vision to you, he’s met with your eyes, and you shatter him with the sweetest smile you’ve ever given him. And there goes his poor heart again. His lips move on their own, returning the gesture without permission, and when you extend your hand in his direction, wordlessly asking him to join you, there goes his stomach. His legs seem to work on their own, because in a few seconds, he’s pushing himself off the wall, crossing the room, and in a few more, Jeno’s got your hand in his. 

“Hey.” You greet quietly, with a small squeeze around his fingers. 

“Hey, yourself.” He instinctively pulls you closer into his side and you smile wider, looking down bashfully, the group you were chatting with long forgotten behind you. 

“Having fun?” You seem genuinely interested, and for some reason, Jeno feels weak. Words don’t come easily in that moment, so he just shrugs, nose scrunching a little.

“You?” 

“Eh, I’m too sober.” The way you wrap both arms around his has him in a chokehold, and Jeno looks around at the chaos of the party, then back down at you. 

“Wanna get out of here?” He asks, relieved that your eyes light up with hope. 

“Disneyland?” You tease, a tiny smirk adorning your face. Jeno chews on his bottom lip to prevent his own smile. 

“Disneyland.” 

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘ 

Jeno’s place is relatively tidy compared to last time you were there. Some books are scattered here and there, a plant struggling to stay alive in the corner, a used-up mug on the coffee table. Though very evident that it’s a boys’ house, you can smell the laundry detergent. It’s messy but clean, and for some reason, that makes you feel a sense of warmth. 

“Not as bad as I thought it would be.” You twirl your finger in the air, gesturing at the space as you walk further inside the living room. 

He snorts as he takes off his shoes, placing them next to yours. “Did you expect a crack den?” 

“Sure looked like one last time.” You stand in front of the bookshelves, scanning all the titles they’ve collected. “I’m assuming these aren’t all yours.” 

“And why would you assume that?” He’s standing a lot closer than you thought; you can almost feel his body heat seeping through your thick jumper. 

“Dunno.” You stay put, refusing to turn around and look at him. “You don’t strike me as much of a reader.” 

He lets out a short laugh, his breath hitting the back of your neck. Oh, he’s close—close. 

“And what do I strike you as?” His fingers make contact with the back of your hand, lightly tracing until his index hooks around your pinky. The gesture feels a lot more intimate than it should, and even though it’s the least sexual thing anyone could do, you feel yourself getting hot. 

“As someone who reads because they should, not because they want to.” 

“Wow.” His whisper hits your ear as his thumb fumbles gently with the ring you’ve got on your pinky. “You’ve got me all figured out, haven’t you?” 

“Not really, no.” Your breath hitches slightly as he wraps his other arm around your middle, pulling you flush against him. His chest feels hard against your back, and his breathing is definitely a lot more stable than yours, but his heartbeat doesn’t match his calmness. It’s oddly comforting. 

He doesn’t stall when you turn around. His lips instantly find yours. No teasing, no hesitation. 

He’s everywhere. 

You feel him everywhere, and your heart hurts from the intensity. From how gentle he is. From how slow he kisses you compared to all the other times. 

You’re worried he can feel the heat radiating off your skin when his hand cradles your face, thumb tracing your cheekbone so delicately you feel hysterical. The whimper you let out seems to encourage him as he tilts his head a little, deepening the kiss, and you can’t help but part your lips more, desperate to taste him. 

Your hands slither up to his hair, threading through the short strands, and a moan escapes from your throat when he pushes you into the bookshelf, his tongue obscenely licking into your mouth, tangling with yours in a wet mess. 

“You hungry?” He mutters into the kiss, clearly with no intention of pulling away, but your arms circle his neck, holding him closer—just in case he made the unacceptable choice of stopping. 

“Mm-mm.” Your refusal vibrates between your mouths as you kiss him harder, his uncoordinated breathing egging you on as you walk him backward, blindly leading your tangled bodies to the sofa. 

“Thirsty?” He’s smiling as he lets you guide him, his hands grabbing onto your hips, refusing to put space between your bodies. 

“No.” You clumsily stumble over your feet, and his arms around you help you regain your balance, his light chuckle hitting you on the lips, breath hot against you, as he harshly lands on the sofa cushions, eagerly helping you straddle him as though being apart from you is unfathomable. 

“Guessing you’re not tired either.” He barely gets to finish the sentence before a grunt leaves him; your fingers pulling harshly at his hair as you shamelessly shove your tongue in his mouth, easily shutting him up. He slumps against the sofa with a sigh against your lips, hands limply resting on your ass as he lets you take control. 

“What about you? You tired?” You break the kiss with a loud, wet smack, your hand around his neck preventing him from trailing after you. You tighten your hold when he attempts to move again, and you revel in the sight of his confused expression. It's almost like a newfound pleasure, like it’s something he didn’t know he wanted until now. You can tell by the tensing of his eyebrows, the quick blinking of his eyes, the tightening of his jaw, the clawing at your ass cheeks. 

He’s never been put in his place before, and it shows. 

“Answer me.” You instruct seductively, lips brushing his as you grind down on the very evident erection suffocating in his jeans. 

“Fuck—no. I’m not fucking tired.” He grits, nostrils flaring in annoyance, and his harsh expression earns a smirk from you as you make sure to press harder on the sides of his neck. A mean laugh tumbles out of you as his resolve breaks, eyes rolling back the second you grind down again, the fabric of your jeans rubbing against your throbbing clit deliciously, but you ignore the pleasure, focusing on how responsive Jeno’s body has suddenly become. 

He could easily overpower you, take matters into his own hands, ruin you if he wanted to, and that knowledge turns you on a lot more than it should. Because he’s actively choosing to be submissive. He’s silently asking to be choked, succumbing to the power you didn’t know you held over him. Until now. 

“You’re kinda pathetic, Jen.” You whisper in his ear, his moan vibrating between your chests as you leave a little kiss on his cheek. “It’s cute.” 

“Fuck off.” 

You’re not sure if it was meant to come out harsh, but it’s far from it. It’s whiny and breathless. 

“That’s mean.” You coo at him, another soft kiss left on his cheek before a theatrical pout takes place on your lips. “You promised you’d be good to me.” 

“You’re the one who’s being mean.” His head turns so he can look at you, arms wrapping tightly around you, and you can’t help but loosen your hold around his throat. 

He’s blinking slowly, breathing shallowly, and you swear his hazy eyes are going to be the death of you. He looks weak and sweet and so fucked out, and if it weren’t for the next words that leave his mouth, you would have held your ground. 

“I like you.” He whispers. So casual but so lethal at the same time. “A lot.” 

You sit up a little, and he follows after you, arms tightening around you as he buries his face in your chest, sighing heavily, making your heart go crazy. He can definitely feel it. 

“Say something.” His words are muffled against the fabric of your jumper, and you can’t tell when exactly you started stroking his hair, both hands softly threading. 

“I like you too.” You murmur in his hair, inhaling the boyish but sweet smell of his shampoo, and you smile when his shoulders visibly relax. 

“Stay tonight.” 

You know what he’s asking, and when he looks up at you, you also know it’s game over. 

You give him a little nod before leaving a chaste kiss on his lips, his surprised expression making you feel giddy. “I’ll stay.” 

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘ 

Lee Jeno is a lot of things.  

He’s stubborn and annoying and cocky at times and he’s annoyingly smart and good with numbers which makes him a good tutor. He’s nice at times too, and funny and oddly endearing. He’s also incredibly hot, and cute, even though he hates being called that.  

But you’ve always known those things.  

What you didn’t know is how incredibly and unfairly good he is at giving head. Out of this world good. And as much as you hate it you also can’t help but love it. What you love the most, however, is how much he seems to love it. 

“Holy shit, Jen, slow down.” You pant, thighs shaking in overstimulation, your body trying to comprehend the intense orgasm it just went through, but Jeno doesn’t seem to give a flying fuck.  

“Shut up and keep your legs open.” He mutters into your drenched pussy, arousal and spit coating the lower half of his face, the scene before you incriminating as you struggle to do as he says with a pathetic whine.  

“I’m too sensitive, you psycho.” Your futile attempt to harshly pull at his hair, backfires as he shoves two fingers in your dripping hole, a string of spit landing on your clit, thumb replacing his tongue in harsh circles. His fingers reach deeper than yours ever have, stimulating the sensitive spot inside your walls with ease.  

“Don’t want my tongue? Fine. You’re taking my fingers.” His hand is thrusting roughly, digits barely pulling out as he creates a vibration-like motion, abusing your g-spot like nobody’s business.  

“Oh my god!” Your screech is embarrassing, and so is the way your trembling fingers grip his bedsheets. What really is mortifying, though, is how loud your cunt is. The lewd sounds are almost offensive to your dignity, which seems to be out the window by now. You feel too hot, sweat dripping down your temples and you wish you had the energy to take off your top, the intense pleasure clouding all your senses. 

“Just accept that you’re gonna cum again.” The sweet kiss he leaves on your inner thigh highly contrasts the way he’s violently fucking into your sopping cunt and you can’t help but give into it. Because he’s right. You’re going to cum again. “There we go, baby, just take it.”  

“Fuck, it’s too much, y-you're too deep.” You cry, asking for a little bit of mercy that doesn’t seem likely to come your way.  

“You’re dripping though.” His hot breath fans on your centre, free hand pressing into your belly, holding you hostage. “Literally ruining my sheets.”  

His humiliating words do something to you, and unfortunately, he seems to notice the way you clench around his fingers, the way your back arches a little more. “Thought you didn’t like me being mean, baby.” 

“Shut the fuck up.” Your voice comes out whiny, no threat laced in it whatsoever, and his laugh is sinister, openly mocking your desperate state, pushing you over the edge unexpectedly. “Fuck, I’m cumming.”  

Your body tenses, chest heaving, walls clamping down on his fingers, forbidding any further movement, but his thumb is relentless, rubbing your poor clit through your high. 

“Shit, baby.” He whispers, the sound barely reaching your buzzing ears. Your eyes are squeezed shut and you reach for anything that can pull back to the surface. Your nails dig into his arm, the one draped over your stomach and he quickly laces his fingers with yours, understanding what you need. “You’re good. I’ve got you.” He trails gentle kisses up and down your thigh, the action soothing, helping you back to a more coherent state. 

“I fucking hate you.” You pant. No irritation in your tone, just defeat and deliriousness. 

He chuckles against your skin, fingers slowly pulling out of your heat. “No, you don’t.”  

Your hands instinctively caress his hair as he starts dragging your top up your torso, a kiss left on every newly uncovered inch of skin. You help him by sitting up a little, arms raising and then hands finding his face as soon as the garment is off, pulling him in for a slow kiss he so easily gives into. You can feel his grin, and it makes you chuckle softly against his lips but neither of you pulls away.  

Within seconds, your back arches, making room for his hands as they unclasp your bra and once it’s gone, you eagerly wrap your arms around his neck, craving to feel his skin on yours, sighing at the way your sensitive nipples drag against his warm chest.  

It’s quiet and loud at the same time. No words are exchanged as you intimately make out with him. It’s all heavy breathing, a whimper here and there, the rustling of his sheets, the wet sound of kissing, one of your phones’ buzzing as neither of you seems to care. It’s a soft moan of yours that breaks the silence, and then one of his as he slowly grinds his jean-clad cock into your tingling pussy, the material harsh on your hypersensitive clit.  

His arms cage your head, supporting his weight as he makes room between your bodies for your hands, trembling fingers clumsily unbuttoning and unzipping his jeans, your hands blindly shoving the material down, both of you to stubborn to pull away from the sloppy kiss you’ve trapped yourselves in.  

“Mmh- just- fuck sake.” You mumble in his mouth and he lets out a small laugh as he reluctantly pushes off you to remove the rest of his clothes hastily. You smile at his erratic movements, relishing in the fact that he’s as needy as you are.  

His mouth is back on yours within seconds, body finding home between your parted legs, fitting just perfectly and you breathe harshly when his cock prods at your entrance.  

“Do we need a condom?” He murmurs breathlessly, eyes meeting as his face hovers just inches above yours. You find it cute how he remembers about protection now, when he’s already finished inside you before.   

“You’re clean?”  

“Yeah.”  

“Then no.” 

He nods with a shaky exhale, and you pull his face closer, not being able to stand any space between you. One arm sneaks around his neck, the other circles his shoulder blade, holding onto him as you prepare for the intrusion, craving the stinging sensation you felt last time he entered you.  

His tip bumps your clit a few times as he rubs the length of his cock between your folds, coating himself in your arousal.  

“So wet, baby.” It sounds pained and you’re slowly starting to lose any restraint that’s left in you.  

“Please, fuck me.” You whine into the dip of his shoulder, hips twitching, raising to find friction.  

The head of his cock kisses your entrance, and the second you start to feel the delicious pressure, he slips, finding your clit once again, making you inhale sharply. You’re so wet, it’s embarrassing. 

“Shit, sorry.” He utters the rushed words as he looks down, between your bodies, one arm propping him above you.  

“It’s okay, just try again.” You caress the back of his neck softly as you patiently wait for a stretch that doesn’t come. He’s still, breathing heavily as he looks down, forehead dropping to your shoulder and now you’re starting to get concerned.  

“You okay?” You ask in confusion, as your hands reach for his face, but he hides in your neck.  

“I’m- this is fucking embarrassing.” His body is trembling and you have no choice but to wrap your arms around him, still not understanding what he’s going on about.  

“Jen, what’s wrong?”  

Did he change his mind or something? Did he just realise he’s not that into you? Or did he just remember he’s got chlamydia?  

“I’m actually freaking out. What is hap- 

“I’ve gone soft.”  

Oh.  

“My dick is soft.” He rephrases, voice muffled in your neck and you try your best not to laugh at his pained tone, by hiding your face in his shoulder. Don’t laugh don’t laugh don’t laugh.  

It's pointless. Inevitable. A snort escapes. He tenses.  

“Are you fucking laughing?”  

“No.” Your arms tighten around his shoulders, trapping him, or preventing him from seeing your pursed lips.  

“I actually fucking hate you.” He exasperates, lips grazing your skin, but he lets his weight slump on you regardless. And you feel it. He really is soft.  

“Are you nervous?” You’re not mocking, just asking genuinely as your thumb strokes his temple, nails gently scratching his scalp, trying to offer some comfort through his embarrassment.  

“Why would I be nervous?” He defends quickly, stubbornness coating his voice.  

“Chill. It’s just a question.”  

“I’m not nervous.” He persists. He really is incapable of lying.  

“You’re overthinking then.” You start tracing patterns on his shoulder with your free hand as his breathing becomes more stable.  

“What’s there to overthink? It's sex.” He sighs as your toes tickle the back of his knee, foot slowly caressing his leg.  

“Erectile dysfunction?” You joke and he huffs out a breath in annoyance, tickling your neck, goosebumps raising. You hum in thought, pretending to be in search of other reasons for his little mishap. He shivers as you lazily start scratching up and down his back, your other hand still in his hair, slightly tugging.  

“Maybe you’re just not that into me then.” A smirk tugs on your lips as he playfully bites down on your shoulder.  

“Yeah.” He nuzzles your jaw. “That must be it.” He starts kissing along the bone, his hand cradling the other side of your face, urging you to face him and he’s miserably failing to hold his smile back, just like you are. He cutely brushes his nose against yours and your brain malfunctions for a second. Never did you think Lee Jeno would be eskimo kissing you in bed right after he got a limp dick because he got too nervous.  

But here you are.  

“You know,” Your hand caresses his wrist as his hand buries in your hair. “You can be really cute sometimes.” Your lips find the tip of his nose, and he slightly flinches as the tender gesture, coaxing a giggle out of you that gets interrupted by his hand roughly pulling at your hair and you know your tactic to get him riled up is working.  

Your whine is muffled by his lips, tongue forcing its way into your mouth like it’s his mission to shut you up and you revel in the dominance he asserts. A big hand wraps around your neck, fingers squeezing a little tighter than you expect, making you feel dizzy as his tongue claims your mouth in the filthiest way possible. Drool smears on your chin and the little twitch you feel on your belly forces a satisfied moan out of you.  

“This cute enough for you?” He breathes into your mouth, his hips grinding with force, hardening cock sliding between your wet folds, cunt throbbing with need. 

“Whatever cutie, just try not to go soft on me again.” 

A sarcastic laugh tumbles out of him. “You trying to piss me off?”  

“Yes.” 

“I will literally fuck you into oblivion.” He mumbles in your ear, his teeth trapping the lobe between them before he starts trailing wet kisses down the side of your neck, hand moving to fondle one of your breasts, fingers harshly squeezing, claiming, making you mewl.  

“Please, do.” You beg cutely, legs wrapping around his waist, heels pushing him into you more as your hips lift momentarily as you feel a new gush of arousal dripping out of you, smearing between your bodies. You just know it’s a mess down there.  

Two of his fingers find your entrance, swirling through the wetness before he abruptly shoves them in to stretch you out again and before you have time to adjust, two become three, stretching your tight hole to the max. Your moans are unrecognisable, downright pornographic and you can’t imagine how good his cock is going to feel. You’re so horny, you feel like you’re going to pass out. 

“Jen- oh fuck- please just put it in.” Your hands grab his face, forcing his eyes onto yours, showing him how blinded with desperation you are. You really want him. And he seems to share the same sentiment. His dilated pupils show you that much.  

He kisses you stupid again, tongue tasting you hungrily as he fucks his fingers into you deep and slow a few more times and then emptiness. He kisses you harder when you whine in protest, but it’s the fat head of his cock prodding at your hole that really shuts you up and this time he doesn’t slip out. This time you feel the sting you so impatiently were craving.  

Your walls flutter around him, but they welcome his thick length greedily, sucking him as he sinks in slowly.  

“Oh my god.” He utters breathlessly as his pubic bone finds yours, hips grinding to help you both get used to the stimulation, mouth dropping open against yours as you bite down on his lip, not caring if your draw blood because it all just feels divine.  

“Move.” You plead, letting your legs spread wide for him, your hands burying in his hair as you bring his lips to your again, needing him closer.  

“Stop clenching so hard. Feels like you’re pushing me out.” He whispers softly, following up with a slow kiss, his hand caressing your thigh as he holds himself up on one forearm by your head, thumb stroking your temple gingerly and you instantly feel yourself relax a little.  

“Sorry.” You murmur into the kiss, feeling him smile against you, your stomach doing that thing it always does when he does the most insignificant things. 

He finally starts moving, slow and deep, cock stimulating every nerve ending in your walls and you’re so sensitive you feel every ridge, every vein, the slight curve of his length and the way he thrusts a little upwards doing wonders to that sweet spot deep inside you.  

He leaves a sweet kiss on your cheek before letting his head drop, face burying in your neck, hot breaths hitting your skin deliciously as you both lose yourselves to the consuming pleasure. Your arms wrap around his broad shoulders, quiet moans filling the space of his room as his pace quickens slightly, the hand on your thigh slipping between you and the mattress, softly squeezing your ass cheek, keeping you in place, grounding you like you need him to. 

“Fuck, baby.” The sweet petname, whispered in your ear, makes your pussy clench around him and he lets out a muffled grunt. His fingers squeeze the flesh of your ass a little harder and his hips start snapping against yours, wet slaps echoing as he fucks you with short and hard thrusts. “You like that?”  

“Yes.” You sigh into his neck, nails clawing at his shoulder blades as you take what he’s giving you, eyes rolling to the back of your head when his cock starts abusing your g-spot, barely pulling out before fucking back into your needy cunt. You feel incredibly close and you’re almost shocked he’s managed to bring you this close to an orgasm so quickly, just with his cock. “Fuck- I’m s-sorry- I think I’m gonna cum.”  

“I can feel you.” He moans and raises his head to look at you. “It’s okay, don’t say sorry. I want you to.” His hips maintain their perfect rhythm, stimulating the gummy spot inside you as well as your swollen clit. “Let go, baby. I’ve got you.”  

You squeeze your eyes shut, not being able to handle his intense stare and another moan from him is what send you over the edge. It’s intense, mind-consuming, your legs shake as he fucks you through it like he’s made for it, messily kissing you, groaning into your mouth as you violently squeeze his cock, walls almost pushing him out, but his thrusts unfaltering.  

“Jesus.” He pants as you cry out, the pleasure now bordering overstimulation, but he doesn’t slow down. His back is drenched in sweat, your fingers slipping as they try to hold onto something and he immediately pins your hands above your head as he starts fucking you harder; bruising, animalistic thrusts melting your brain into mush.  

“J-Jen, I’m- oh f- I can’t-  

“Shhh. You can. It’ll feel good again.” His tongue finds yours in a kiss full of teeth and spit and you can barely focus on anything, too fucked out to function properly. You’re thankful you’re at least breathing. “You’re mine. Right, baby?” 

Holy fuck. What is happening?  

“I am?” You mumble against his lips, your heart going ballistic.  

“You’re my girl, no?” He holds your arms pinned with one hand as the other cradles your jaw, eyes finding yours. 

“Yes.” You breathe out pathetically.  

“Say it.” He demands with a sharp thrust, balls slapping against your ass, your arousal coating your inner thighs as he grinds into you.  

“I’m your girl.” The tip of his cock brushes your abused spot again, mind-numbing pleasure building again, like it never went away. 

“Fuck yeah, you are.” He traps your bottom lip between his teeth, sucking before releasing. “Mine.”  

Your breathing is laboured as his hips resume their ministrations. Fucking you hard and fast towards another high that seems to come even quicker than the previous one. It’s like he’s forcing them out of you. And you know you’re going to be ruined for any other man after this. You really are his. He owns you. But you can’t say that. You refuse to admit it. Even as he’s balls deep in you, fucking you into oblivion, exactly like he promised. 

“Are you mine?” It slips out before you can register the thought. You blame his dick.  

He moans. It’s strangled and deep, his eyebrows tensing as he blinks quickly, as though trying to comprehend your words. It’s cute and hot at the same time. “Fuck- you know I am.” 

“Tell me.” You whisper, short-breathed, nuzzling your nose with his, your foreheads almost touching and his eyes roll back when your walls flutter around him again. What a sight.  

“I’m yours, baby.” He grunts as you purposely tighten around him and you didn’t think it was possible, but he fucks you harder, the sounds obscene, your back arching as he sits up, kneeling between you spread legs, pushing them up to your chest, fucking you so deep you have to brace your hands against the headboard, a loud cry leaving your throat. “All yours. All for my girl.”  

“Oh my god.” You exhale harshly, nails digging into wood as his words send you into a frenzy. “Fuuuuck I’m gonna cum.” Your tone pleading and he can’t do anything other than oblige.  

“Uh-huh, cum for me, baby.” He whispers, head hanging low as he lets a good amount of saliva dribble from his mouth onto where you’re both connected, and your broken moan echoes around the walls of his room when the digit quickly finds your swollen clit, all wet and slippery from arousal and spit. He flicks the nub in quick up and down motions as he tries to keep the same angle of his hips.  

A particularly soft flick of his thumb is what makes your body seize, drowning you in obliterating pleasure as your pussy squeezes tight around him again, this orgasm even more intense than the previous one, if not the most intense one you’re ever had in your whole existence. 

He pulls out with a grunt, hovering over you again, a deep kiss left on your lips before he continues down to your neck, sucking and licking, marking your sweaty skin, and you whimper weakly when his tongue finds a nipple, his big hands squishing your sensitive tits and you don’t have it in you anymore to deny him anything. He can do as he pleases. 

“So pretty.” He mumbles, completely lost in his own little world that seems to be occupied only by your nipples and tits as he lathers them in his spit, licking and sucking like man starved.  

Before you have time to regain your breathing, you’re on your front, face buried in his pillows as his hands grab onto your hips.  

“Ass up for me, baby.” He helps you get on your knees, back arched, tits squished against his mattress. “Spread your legs.” He gently taps your outer thigh and you oblige with a whimper as he starts leaving wet kisses on one of your ass cheeks, hands kneading the flesh.  

“What are you doing?” You mumble, slightly panicked as he gets closer and closer to your asshole.  

You attempt to look back when no answer comes, but your head drops back down in defeat as his tongue licks a fat stripe from your clit to your dripping entrance. The moan that erupts from your throat is broken, surprise evident as you tangle your fingers in his sheets.  

“What the fuck.” You whisper, rushed words muffled by Jeno’s pillows. Your jaw slackens as his tongue languidly circles your sopping hole, dipping lightly, tasting you shamelessly and within seconds it travels back down to your clit, flicking it from side to side with the tip of his tongue, making your legs tremble, struggling to hold you up.  

You’re a mess down there, you know it. The filthy sounds filling the room, prove that much. He’s sloppy with it; making out with your pussy like he’s thirsty, tongue everywhere, even slipping up to your other tight hole a few times, coating you in his spit wherever he can reach.  

“Shit.” He rasps. “I could eat this pussy for days, baby.”  

“Jen-” 

“So perfect.” He mumbles in awe, his lips brushing your sensitive clit before wrapping around it, sucking harshly, tongue flicking in quick motions, driving you crazy, turning you into a blabbering mess, a hand reaching behind you to tangle in his hair, pulling desperately.  

“Please fuck me. Want your cum in me.” You don’t even know where that filth came from, but you can’t bring yourself to care in the slightest. You think you might lose the plot if he doesn’t stick his cock in your aching pussy right this second.  

Thankfully, your begging deems rewarding. You feel the mattress dip behind you as he repositions and the sound you make when he stuffs you to the brim in one motion, resembles a scream.  

“Yeah? My girl wants my cum?” His voice barely reaches your ears over your loud moans as he starts thrusting into you in no time. Hard and fast. And you feel him in your fucking throat; the position allowing him to go deeper than anyone has before. His hands grab onto your waist, fucking you silly onto his cock, his balls slapping your poor clit deliciously and you’re positive you’re drooling onto his pillow.  

“Oh, my fucking god. Right there.” You plead urgently as his tip nudges your g-spot for the umpteenth time tonight, your eyes rolling in the back of your skull, arms crossing over the small of your back, silently asking him to take complete control over your spent body.  

“Shit, Y/N.” He pants, one hand taking hold of your wrists, the other grabs onto your shoulder, forcing you onto his cock, the wet slaps of his hips onto your ass turning you on beyond belief. You arch your back more, craving to feel him as deep as possible and his moan tells you he’s equally as affected. “You look so good like this.” 

You twist your neck, looking over your shoulder, desperately searching for his eyes. You know you look destroyed, barely able to keep your eyes open, but you want him to see, want him to know what he’s done to you, that it’s all him.  

The second his gaze meets yours, you know it’s game over for both of you. He looks unreal, sweat dripping from his temples down to his neck, chest glistening and heaving, abs flexing beautifully each time he thrusts forward. You know he can feel your walls tightening. His eyes closing momentarily, jaw clenching, his hold around your wrists becoming so deliciously painful, you hope it leaves a mark. 

The hand on your shoulder slips in your hair, pulling, forcing you off the mattress as he leans forward, slotting your lips with his in a sloppy kiss. It’s full of tongue, saliva and need. You love it. You love everything he’s doing to you.  

“You gonna cum one more time for me, yeah?” He whispers wetly against your lips, spit smearing on both your chins and you can’t help but nod dumbly. “Good girl.” 

Your face is shoved in his pillow again and next thing you know, he’s fucking the living shit out of you, hand now at the base of your nape as his hold around your wrists doesn’t loosen.  

“You’re so fucking perfect for me.”  

It’s the primal, raw need in his voice along with the brush against your sweet spot that has you teetering over the edge again. It’s overwhelming. Your fists clench at the small of your back, legs shaking and weren't he holding you in place, you would have collapsed on the mattress limbless.  

A tear escapes from the corner of your eye from the intensity, trickling down to the pillowcase and you thank the universe when you hear a deep grunt leaving his throat, signalling the beginning of his own orgasm.  

“Shit, baby, I’m cumming.” His voice trembles and his hips stutter, sloppily thrusting until your feel warmth spreading inside your throbbing cunt, his hot release painting your walls white. He grinds into your ass, dragging both your highs until he lets out a whimper of overstimulation and you intentionally clench a couple of times, wanting to torture him for a little longer considering what he put your body through tonight. Not that you’re complaining, but the pathetic whine that escapes his throat, along with his hands grabbing your hips in urgency, is the best reward you could ask for now.  

You accidentally let out a breathy chuckle that becomes louder when he lightly slaps your ass in warning. “Don’t be a brat.”  

You mewl when he slowly pulls out and manhandles you onto your back. He leans down, seeking for your lips and he sighs when you meet him halfway, slotting your mouth with his on instinct as his body moulds with yours, his hand slipping his softening length back into your dripping hole with no warning, earning a yelp from you.  

“Mmh, Jen-” 

“Relax.” He mumbles into the kiss. “Just feels warm.” He whispers, and you can detect a tone of shyness. You can’t help but smile fondly at the side of him you’ve rarely seen.  

“You’re weird.” You tease, still kissing him slowly.  

“You’re annoying.” He retorts, leaving quick little kisses on your lips, moving onto your cheeks, then your nose, then returning to your lips with a chaste smooch that deems you helpless. Giggles and butterflies erupting.  

“But you like me.” You sing playfully, dragging the sentence, hands squishing his cheeks to annoy him even more. He stares down at you for a moment, biting his bottom lip to contain a smile you can see anyway.  

“But I like you.” He admits, blinking slowly and you can’t help but return the smile before leaning up to give him another sweet kiss.  

Lee Jeno likes you and you like him too.  

Who would have thought? Definitely not you. 

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘ 

When you return from the bathroom, covered in the t-shirt he had on earlier, he is already under the covers, lying on his front. You’d be surprised if he wasn’t exhausted after all that. His bare back looks kissable and the back of his hair a mess and you can’t stop smiling giddily.  

A ding averts your attention. It’s your phone, coming from your jeans lying on the floor messily. You pick up the piece of clothing as well as the rest of your scattered clothes, placing them somewhat neatly on his desk chair before retreating your phone from your back pocket and setting it on silent mode.  

“Could you get mine too?” His groggy voice breaks through the silence as you scroll through any missed notifications.  

“Sure.” You reach inside the pocket of his jeans and as you’re about to toss him the phone, he speaks again. 

“Just turn my alarm off.” He mumbles in the pillow he’s got his face squished in. So cute.  

You snort. “Why do you have an alarm set for Sunday?”  

“I was gonna go gym, but wanna snooze with you. Is that alright?” He fires back, sarcastic even when he’s sleepy.  

“I guess that’s alright.” You feign an exasperated sigh. “What’s your passcode?” 

“Six-nine-six-nine.” He mutters indifferently and you snort again at the silly combination of numbers he’s chosen. Of course it’s sex related.  

“Meaningful.” 

“Just do it and come back to bed.” He huffs impatiently, which makes you giggle.  

The delighted sound is cut short the second his phone unlocks. Two incriminating messages from that Yuna girl, and a few more from Haechan. You feel like you’re invading, but they’re right there for your eyes to read. And you instantly regret the whole night.  

Yuna: where were u tonight  Yuna: thought we were meeting 🙁 

Haechan: yuna is looking for you  Haechan: on the verge of telling her you’re busy clapping cheeks with stats girl  Haechan: she’s pissing me off   Haechan: just cut if off if you’re into y/n  Haechan: don’t be an idiot 

You instantly like Haechan a little more and Jeno a little less. Did he really bring you to a party he was planning on meeting a side piece at?  

What the actual fuck.  

“Get back here.” Jeno grumbles sleepily from the bed, and you’re stuck between throwing the phone at his head and smashing it on the floor.  

You do neither. You choose to stay calm for now. You’re too tired to cause a scene or have an argument.  

“Coming.” You utter quietly, turning off his alarm before walking back to the bed.  

You get under the covers without another word. Your mind racing a thousand miles per hour, not knowing what to really think. You turn the bedside lamp off, mainly because you want to hide your watering eyes and he instantly shuffles closer, his arm wrapping around you, pulling your back flush against his chest, his body curling into yours comfortably.  

The kiss he leaves on your shoulder makes you close your eyes, refusing to shed tears right now. Grow up Y/N.  

He lets out a sigh, his warm breath hitting the back of your neck.  

“Night, baby.” He whispers softly, sounding already halfway to dreamland.  

You knew this was too good to be true. But what are you supposed to do now? 

“Night, Jen.” 

∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘ 

Jeno’s fist hurts from the loud banging on the door of your apartment. 

Last night he went to sleep happy and content. Ecstatic at the thought of waking up next to you, spending the morning in bed with you. But when he woke up all alone and confused, all those positive feelings went down the drain. He feels enraged. Humiliated. But most of all, he feels something he hasn’t felt in a really long time. Something that until now, he hasn’t allowed himself to feel. 

Hurt. 

His chest physically hurt when he realised you weren’t in the bathroom or anywhere else in his place. He felt sick when he saw your clothes were not on his chair anymore and your shoes gone from his doorstep. 

But then, when he checked his phone for any missed calls or texts from you, he realised what was going on. And he felt angry. Mostly with himself but also with you, because you chose to not trust him. Again. Because you chose to leave in silence. Because you chose to drop him instead of talking to him. 

So, he’s here, banging on your door like a lunatic, running after you like he always is. Because he wants to fix this. Because he can’t let you go. He refuses to. 

Because Jeno doesn’t just like you. He’s crazy about you. He wants you like he’s never wanted anybody else in his entire existence. 

Because he’s a fool. A fool who’s undeniably in love with the girl he was just supposed to tutor and help pass a stupid stats class. 

When the door opens, Mark appears. 

“Where is she?” Jeno asks abruptly and Mark’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise. 

“Um, hi?” 

“Yeah. Hi. Where is she?” He repeats, not in the mood for small talk. 

“I’m under strict instructions to not let you in.” Mark admits in a low tone. He looks scared. 

Jeno walks close to the boy, putting on a fake smile and Mark’s eyes go wide as he takes a step back in fear. 

“Do you want to spend the rest of your life in a wheelchair?” Jeno speaks slowly in a sweet tone, hand raising to squeeze Mark’s shoulder in warning. 

“No sir.” 

“Good. Tell me where she is.” 

“But I-” 

“Mark.” Tone devoid of any emotion now. Cold as ice. Mark gulps loudly. “I will genuinely beat the living shit out of you.” 

“She’s in the shower.” Mark steps aside obediently, giving Jeno space to enter the apartment. “You can wait in her room.” 

Jeno smiles and gently pats Mark on the cheek. “Good boy.” 

As he walks down the hall towards your room, Jeno hears Giselle scolding poor Mark, who just whines quietly. Something along the lines of ‘you try then’ and a defeated sigh. 

Jeno feels bad for speaking to Mark like that, but he had to do what he had to do. He’ll apologise later. All he really cares about now is you. 

He takes a seat at the foot of your made bed and his mind drifts to that night he found you lying in his bed. All sad and alone. He remembers how upset you were about your ex and hates to think that he’s now just another guy who’s hurt you. Because that’s the last thing Jeno wants to do. All he wants is to be with you. 

He knows he’s not easy to trust and he knows you have trust issues. You’ve never talked about it, but you don’t have to; he can tell. And he doesn’t care. He’ll do whatever it takes to gain your trust, but he needs you to want him to try. He needs you to listen to what he has to say. 

“Was me leaving without a word not enough of a statement?” Your irritated voice interrupts his messy thoughts and Jeno shoots up to his feet. 

Here you are, shutting your door closed and leaning against it. Your hair is wet from the shower you’ve clearly just had and you’re dressed in a baggy t-shirt and cute pyjama bottoms with sushi rolls on them. Under normal circumstances his first thought would have been damn, she’s cute but right now all he can see are your red glossy eyes. You’ve been crying. Because of him. 

“Why can’t you ever just talk to me when something’s wrong?” His question comes out more accusatory than he intends and he already hates himself for not being able to keep calm. 

“What’s the point?” You say weakly, chin quivering, lips pursing as you look at anywhere but him, blinking your tears away and Jeno can’t stand seeing you like this. He just wants to hug you. Keep you safe in his chest. 

“Y/N.” He says sternly, walking closer to you and before you can escape, he’s got your face in his hands, thumb wiping away the single tear that’s escaped. “Baby, look at me.” 

“Jen, just-” 

“Hey, no. Look at me.” He cups your cheeks, even as you attempt to turn away from him. You give in with a defeated sigh. “Those texts you saw. They mean nothing. I swear-” 

“I can fucking read.” You interrupt him, voice not so weak now. “She thought you were meeting her.” 

“I agreed to that ages ago. I didn’t even remember, I fucking swear! It was before we-” He sighs, closing his eyes momentarily to compose himself. “Look. I meant what I said last night. Yes, it was during sex but I really did fucking mean it.” 

You blink once. 

“You’re my girl.” He steps closer, the sweet smell of your shampoo taking over his senses for a second, but he focuses again. “You’re the only one. I want you. Just you. I’m so- I promise you- I haven’t been with anyone else since that first time. I don’t want anyone else. I only want you.” 

“Why?” You whisper, eyes wide. 

“Because. You’re you. And you’re perfect for me. And I can barely think when you’re around. And I’m literally about to have a heart attack right now.” He grabs your hand and places it on his chest, and he knows you can feel his insane heartbeat when your breath hitches. “You’re so fucking annoying. And I’m crazy about you.” 

There. He said it. 

You sniffle and before he can say anything else, your arms wrap around his waist, face burying in his heaving chest. 

“You have to believe me.” He’s close to begging now, breathing unstable, but he holds you close anyway, arms circling around your shoulders, nose nuzzling in your wet hair. 

“I believe you.” You whisper in his chest. “I’m sorry I didn’t-” 

“Don’t apologise.” He cuts you off. “I’m the one who fucked up. I should’ve-” 

“It’s fine.” You butt in, and he smiles at how you’re both just communicating in unfinished sentences without failing to understand one another. 

“So, what now?” He tries tentatively, unsure of how to approach anything at this point. He just wants things between you to be okay. 

“I’m tired.” You mumble weakly, and he feels guilt wash over him. You probably didn’t get much sleep last night, while he cluelessly dozed off so quickly. 

“Wanna take a nap?” He suggests as his fingers thread through your hair, trying to help you relax. 

“Will you stay?” You look up at him with soft eyes, still wet from crying and there goes his aching heart again. 

“Of course, baby.” His palms tenderly cradle your face again and he melts when you stand on your tippy toes. He quickly gives into you, head dipping down slightly to give you the kiss you’re silently asking for. 

It’s soft and sweet. You taste like you and toothpaste, and he has to pull away before the innocent kiss escalates into something else. “Come on, let’s get you in bed.” 

Once you’re both under your cosy blanket, he lets you rest your head on his chest, arm around your shoulders, one hand stroking your hair, the other tangled with yours, holding them close to his chest, over his now steady heartbeat. Your breathing gradually slows down and when he’s sure you’re asleep, he takes his phone out of his pocket, quickly unlocking it and opening his chat with Yuna. He sends the text without even thinking it over and sighs as he sets his phone down on your bedside table. 

He smiles as he inhales your familiar scent, his eyes closing in contentment as he keeps repeating the words he just typed out, in his head. Particularly the second sentence. 

Can’t see you anymore. I have a girlfriend. 

And yeah, he's yet to ask you properly, but at the end of the day, you’re his girl. And it can’t get any deeper than that. 

©neogotmycookie

taglist: @fancypeacepersona, @miauumin, @hi00000234567, @leehaechie, @0423luvbot, @yoonohswife, @lovesuhng, @slightlyunhingedsagittarius, @813ths, @m8rkers, @bluedbliss, @zhapire, @focusonyeri, @inthearcade, @papichulomacy, @wispyharmony, @floraljae, @honeybeehorizon, @abcdefuvk, @cxralrxses, @tteokbelly, @jaehyunpeachyy, @kissyfacekoo, @juniper-flour

[withlovemark]

“girl talk”

word count: 3k+ | genre: fluff, smut | featured couple: 🐾🐰

synopsis: girl talk with jeno except he loves how cute you are so much that he can't help but sabotage it.

→ takes place during loverboy hendery's, call me

jeno hums in quiet amusement, leaning back in his computer chair, one arm hooked loosely around your waist while the other rests against the armrest.

his game sits forgotten on the screen, abandoned the second you climbed onto his lap.

you’re straddling him, knees on either side of his thighs, leaning forward slightly as you talk, completely unaware of how close you are. his gaze fixed entirely on you.

“jeno, you have nooo idea,” you whisper dramatically, leaning in like you’re about to reveal classified information.

his eyebrows lift immediately, playing along without hesitation.

“should i be worried?”

“no,” you say quickly, shaking your head before lowering your voice again, more serious now, “but honey told me something today.”

and here it is.

he’ll never admit it out loud.

but he loves girl talk with you.

not necessarily for the stories — though those can be entertaining too — half the time he barely knows who the people you’re talking about even are. the names blur together sometimes.

but…the way your eyes light up when you tell them?

that part he never misses.

jeno hums again, softer this time, his hand sliding absentmindedly along your back before settling at your waist, fingers resting there like they’ve memorized the shape of you.

“honey? that’s xiaojun’s girl, right?” he murmurs, piecing it together just enough.

you nod immediately, serious, like this is important.

“okay so apparently — and don’t! tell anyone because this is a top tier secret—” you pause, letting the suspense build, leaning even closer without realizing it, “—the leader of the pinks sorority,” your voice drops, “…and hendery.”

jeno’s head tilts slightly at the mention of his friend, “hendery? like wayv frat leader hendery?”

“yes,” you whisper urgently, eyes wide.

his mouth pulls into a quiet grin, clearly amused — not at the story, but at how invested you are.

“okayy,” he says slowly, dragging it out just a little, “continue.”

you lean in even closer, practically conspiratorial now, your hands coming up to rest on his shoulders without thinking.

“they’ve been secretly hooking up since sophomore year.”

jeno blinks, a bit of shock actually plastered on his face, “what?”

“crazy, right!” you gasp, hands lifting for emphasis before settling back on him, your energy spilling over into every movement.

jeno lets out a quiet breath of a laugh, shaking his head as he leans back slightly, the chair creaking under the shift.

“aren’t their houses like… rivals or something?”

you point at him instantly, eyes lighting up, “i know! that’s exactly what i said!”

he watches you for a moment. the way you lean forward every time you make a point, like the story pulls you closer. the way your lips move too fast for your thoughts, like you’re trying to get everything out at once before you forget.

his hand squeezes just slightly at your waist, grounding, steady.

“and nobody knew this?” he asks, quieter now, still playing along, still following, even if his focus is slipping back to you.

“apparently not,” you say, eyes wide, completely invested, “honey said they’ve been sneaking around for years. like secret meetups, late night stuff, the whole thing.”

jeno lets out a low whistle, head tipping back against the chair for a second before his gaze finds you again, “that’s kinda impressive.”

you stare at him, “jeno.”

“i’m just saying,” he laughs, lifting one hand in mock defense while the other stays right where it is on your waist, keeping you close without even thinking about it, “keeping a secret that long on a campus like this?” he shakes his head, amused, “that takes skill.”

you roll your eyes, but you’re smiling.

and jeno…he’s just focused on you.

because the truth is, he’s only half following the story now. the other half of his attention is on the way your eyes shine when you’re excited, the warmth of you sitting comfortably in his lap like it’s the most natural place in the world. like you belong there.

his thumb traces slow, lazy circles at your waist.

“so what else did she say?” he asks quietly, voice softer now, like he’s easing you right back into it.

your eyes light up immediately again, “okay wait…it gets juicier.”

jeno’s grin spreads, fond and a little amused, “oh, does it?”

you nod enthusiastically, already leaning in again — and he lets himself sink a little deeper into the chair, arms tightening loosely around you like he’s settling in, like he’s not going anywhere.

and he doesn’t want to.

because he could sit here all night listening to you ramble about campus gossip if it meant you stayed exactly where you are — straddling his lap, smiling like this, looking at him like he’s the only person you want to tell your secrets to.

“so apparently,” you continue, fully pulled back into the story now, your hands resting on his shoulders, fingers curling slightly into his shirt, “hendery is like… actually in love with her.”

jeno’s brows lift, playing along, “in love?”

“yes,” you say emphatically, “he’s been obsessed with her since sophomore year. apparently all the boys in wayv house know it too.”

jeno lets out a quiet hum, his hand resting comfortably at your waist, “that’s rough.”

“exactly,” you say, nodding rapidly, “because the problem is she refuses to commit.”

jeno tilts his head slightly, eyes still on you, “refuses?”

“yeah,” you sigh dramatically. “like they’ve been secretly hooking up for years but every time he tries to make it official she shuts it down.”

jeno’s mouth twitches, a quiet hint of a smile, “poor guy.”

“right?” you lean forward again, more animated now, pulled deeper into it, “honey said he literally tried to ask her to define the relationship and she told him—”

you stop.

just for half a second. because you feel something warm brush your skin. jeno’s lips. soft. barely there. against your collarbone.

you blink, momentarily thrown off — your words catching for just a beat before you push through it anyway.

“—she told him she didn’t want their houses involved in drama and—”

another kiss.

just as soft. just as distracting.

jeno hums quietly against your skin like he’s still listening, like nothing’s changed, his thumb still tracing slow circles at your waist.

you narrow your eyes slightly, glancing down at him.

“…jeno.”

his lips pause for a second, lingering just above your skin, but his hands don’t move from your waist — if anything, they tighten just a little, like he doesn’t want you shifting away.

“hmm?” he murmurs, voice low, innocent in a way that’s definitely not convincing.

“are you paying attention?”

“mhm,” he answers easily, lips brushing your collarbone again, soft and absentminded, like he’s doing it without thinking, “i am.”

you squint at him, clearly unconvinced, but you push forward anyway.

“anyway,” you continue, trying to gather your thoughts again, “so he’s been waiting for her to change her mind this whole time.”

jeno presses another kiss just below the first, slower this time, like he’s lingering on purpose.

“that’s dedication,” he murmurs against your skin.

your sentence stumbles into a warning, “…jeno.”

“what?” he asks, tone light, but his lips are still hovering there, barely pulling away.

you inhale quietly, trying to refocus.

“as i was saying,” you continue, stubborn now, determined to get through it, “honey said the boys think she keeps him around because she likes him but she doesn’t want the responsibility of actually dating him.”

jeno hums in response, drawing you in closer without asking. another kiss. this one slower. warmer. you inhale a little sharper this time before forcing yourself to keep going.

“and apparently he still drives her home every time they meet up and—”

kiss.

“jeno.”

“yeah?” he replies softly.

you try to glare at him but it’s difficult when he looks so relaxed, so completely at ease — chin dipped slightly, eyes half-lidded as he presses another gentle kiss along your collarbone like he has all the time in the world. completely innocent. and completely distracting.

“you’re ruining our girl talk.”

jeno smiles faintly against your skin, the corner of his lips brushing you, “am i?”

“yes,” you say, firmer this time, even if your voice wavers just a little.

he finally pulls back, just enough to look up at you, expression calm, unreadable — but there’s something playful sitting right behind his eyes.

he knows exactly what he’s doing.

“finish the story,” he says, like nothing happened, thumb still tracing slow circles at your waist, grounding, steady. “i’m listening.”

you stare at him for a second, trying to decide if you believe that. then you sigh dramatically.

“ok so,” you continue, though your voice is a little less steady now, “so honey thinks hendery is eventually going to snap and demand she either commits or—”

your words falter.

because jeno’s not even pretending anymore. his gaze flickers from your eyes to your lips for just a second, then back up again — slow, deliberate, like he’s weighing something. like he’s deciding. his hand shifts slightly at your waist, thumb pressing a little more firmly this time.

“or…what?” he asks quietly, a teasing glint in his eye.

he doesn’t sound all that interested in hendery anymore. and it’s getting harder to focus on words when his lips brush your skin like that.

screw the girl talk.

you lean in, capturing his lips with yours, with absolutely no warning. jeno’s eyes widen for a split second in surprise, then flutter shut as he responds eagerly, his mouth parting to deepen the kiss, tongue slipping past your lips.

“bunny,” he chuckles against your lips, the sound vibrating through you as his hands grips your hip, pulling you flush against him.

“—or what?” he teases, again.

“it can wait,” you say breathlessly, your fingers threading through his soft hair to tug him back in.

his lips meets yours again, soft at first, but the heat builds quickly as you sink deeper into it.

he parts from the kiss for a second, fingers gently reaching up, careful and tender, hooking the arms of your glasses and sliding them off your face, setting them aside on the desk. his touch lingers on your cheek for a moment before returning to pull you closer, tilting his head and connecting your mouths fully, tongue sliding in, slow, exploratory, tasting you with languid strokes that curl against yours.

his hands roam slowly up your sides, fingers tracing the hem of your t-shirt before slipping beneath it to graze your bare skin. his touch igniting sparks.

you follow his lead, the rhythm he’s set unhurried but intense. the kiss turns wet and thorough, saliva mixing as he sucks gently on your tongue, drawing a soft moan from your throat.

“mmm,” he hums into your mouth, breaking only for air, nipping at your lower lip, then diving back in.

your fingers curl into his hair, pulling him even closer as you tilt your head to give him better access, the kiss turning sloppy, tongues sliding insistently.

the chair creaks faintly as you shift your hips, grinding down against the growing bulge in his sweats. his thick cock hardening beneath you, pressing up through the layers — your leggings and his sweats creating just enough friction to make your pussy throb.

jeno groans low, the sound muffled against your lips and he bucks up lazily, matching your roll with a deliberate thrust.

you pull back a fraction, panting, your lips glistening from the thorough attention.

“this better be worth ruining girl talk,” you tease, voice breathy.

his eyes are dark, hooded with desire, but a playful smirk tugs at his swollen lips.

“oh, it will be,” he murmurs, capturing your lips once more in a slow, sucking kiss that leaves you dizzy.

one hand slides down to your ass, squeezing, guiding your movements, urging you to hump against him harder.

the dry friction builds heat fast — his dick grinding right against your clit with each pass, your wetness soaking into your panties.

you rock steadily now, the pace still teasing, playful pushes and pulls that have him breathing raggedly into the kiss. his tongue laps at yours in mirroring slowness, hot and wet, while his free hand cups your neck, thumb stroking your jaw to keep you locked in the makeout.

every grind sends jolts of pleasure through you, his cock so rigid it outlines perfectly against your pussy.

“fuck,” he whispers, parting from your lips and trailing kisses down your jaw, nipping at the sensitive skin there, “want more of you,” he murmurs against your neck, voice rough and low.

his fingers hook into the waistband of your leggings, tugging them down quickly. you lift your ass slightly to help, the fabric peeling away from your skin, exposing the damp spot on your panties where your arousal has already soaked through.

he slides the leggings off your legs completely, letting them pool on the floor. the air feels cool against your heated skin but jeno’s warmth presses right back in as he pulls you flush against him again.

his hands immediately return to your ass, palms cupping the full cheeks, squeezing hard enough to make you gasp. his grip is firm, possessive, thumbs pressing into the crease where your thighs meet your ass, spreading you open just a bit as he guides your hips down to his clothed bulge.

you grind against him immediately, the friction now more direct, your panty covered pussy rubbing along the length of his cock through his sweats. he’s so hard. the outline thick and throbbing. you’re so wet. the fabric of your panties growing slicker, you can feel it leaking out — dampening his sweats, leaving a visible wet patch on the grey material.

jeno’s gaze drops, fixated on the sight of you grinding slowly on his lap. he can’t look away, eyes glued to the way your soaked panties cling to your folds, the dark stain spreading wider as you bounce a little faster.

“shit,” he breathes out, voice strained, one hand sliding up to grip your hip tighter, urging you to keep that rhythm.

you moan in response, the direct pressure on your clit sending sparks up your spine, making your thighs tremble as you grind down harder.

“neno,” you whimper, nails scraping over his shoulders through his t-shirt, your body arching into the friction, your pussy throbbing, clenching at the tease of his hardness so close yet not inside.

“you’re killing me, bunny,” he groans deep in his throat, fingers digging deeper into your ass, spreading you wider so your clit catches perfectly on his tip with each bounce.

his breaths come ragged, chest heaving, and you feel him twitch violently beneath you, the heat of his arousal seeping through.

the sight of him so entranced, eyes dark and hooded, lips parted as he watches your body work him over — it pushes you further. you let out a breathy moan, picking up the pace just a touch, bouncing with more intent, your panties so drenched they slide slickly against his sweats.

“feels so good,” you gasp, head falling forward to rest against his shoulder for a moment, but you don’t stop, hips rolling in tight circles. your core tightens, pleasure coiling hot and insistent, but jeno’s reactions hit you harder — his grip bruising your ass, pulling you down forcefully now, like he’s chasing something urgent.

“fuck—can’t... hold it,” he grunts suddenly. his cock jerks hard against you, and then he’s cumming, hot spurts soaking into his sweats as his hips buck up uncontrollably — head thrown back against the chair, lips parted in a silent groan that turns into a low, guttural moan. his face twists in ecstasy, eyebrows furrowed, cheeks flushed, completely fucked out and lost in it.

the wet warmth spreads under you, mixing with your own slickness, making the friction even messier as you keep moving through his release.

you smirk down at him, satisfied, slowing your bounces to a teasing grind, savoring the vision of jeno unraveling beneath you — his chest rising and falling harshly, a sheen of sweat on his neck, that dazed look in his eyes as he finally blinks up at you.

“have i ever told you how pretty you look like that?” you say, pulling a low chuckle from his chest.

“you’re prettier,” he murmurs, voice thick and gravelly, one hand sliding from your ass up to your lower back, holding you steady as the other dips between your bodies, and into your soaked panties.

his thumb presses directly against your clit, starting a slow, firm rub that tightens that coil in your stomach again.

“oh god, jeno,” you gasp, the direct pressure igniting every nerve, your hips snapping forward on instinct.

you cling to him tighter, arms wrapping around his neck, fingers threading into his hair as you bury your face against his shoulder as you grind down desperately, rolling your hips in urgent, needy circles, chasing that building fire while his thumb continues circling your swollen nub.

you can’t hold back, the moans spilling from your lips right by his ear — soft, breathless whimpers.

his favorite sounds. right next to you yapping his ear off.

your pussy clenches around nothing, thighs trembling as you hump against him faster, the chair groaning under the frantic pace.

“yes, right there,” you plead, voice breaking into a whine, nails scraping lightly at his scalp as your hips buck wildly.

he doesn’t let up, thumb flicking side to side now, then rubbing broad and fast, his free arm tightening around your waist to keep you pinned close, absorbing every desperate roll of your body.

“you’re gonna soak me, aren’t you?,” he growls low, breath hot against your skin.

you nod frantically, moans spilling hot and ragged against his neck, until you break with a breathless whine, body seizing as your orgasm rips through you, pussy pulsing wildly, gushing wetness over his hand, clinging to him as he holds you steady.

your body hums with the aftershocks, chest heaving as you slump against jeno's shoulder, the world fuzzy around the edges from that shattering release. he doesn't rush you, just wraps both arms around your body, tracing gentle, soothing circles along your spine beneath the rumpled t-shirt.

you feel his lips brush feather-light kisses against the exposed skin of your neck, then your collarbone, warm and tender pecks that make your eyelids flutter in contentment.

minutes slip by like that, your breaths syncing up as the haze clears, his steady heartbeat thumping under your cheek.

finally, you push yourself up a little, propping on his chest, the sticky evidence of your combined messes cooling between you.

jeno's eyes meet yours, a teasing glint sparking in them as he tilts his head, voice low and playful.

“so…you were saying? what does honey think hendery is gonna do?”

you blink at him, the post-orgasm glow fading into a sudden wave of annoyance.

your cheeks heat — not from arousal this time, but from the sheer audacity of him circling back to that gossip like nothing happened.

glaring at him, you huff, crossing your arms over your chest.

“ugh, see—this is why i prefer girls’ talk with the girls,” you pout, lips pursing in exaggerated frustration, “you’re too distracting.”

that earns a wide, amused grin from him, his hands sliding down to grip under your thighs, fingers digging into the soft flesh there.

“let me distract you some more,” he teases, voice husky with renewed intent, before he lifts you effortlessly off his lap.

a surprised squeal escapes your lips as he stands, your legs wrapping instinctively around his waist.

he carries you the short distance to his bed and drops you onto the rumpled sheets with a playful bounce, hovering over you immediately, bracing on his forearms to cage you in, his body heat enveloping you.

“and you wonder why no boys are allowed in girl talk,” you joke, reaching up to trace a finger along his jaw, your voice light but laced with challenge.

both of you are smiling now, breaths mingling in the close space, the air thick with that easy, flirtatious energy before his lips press onto yours again

🐰

an: i finished this earlier when i thought was doing okay. i unfortunately am so so sad again so this is probably my last fic for a while. i will try to get orgasm donor johnny out before april ends but i’m gonna be honest chiefs, writing smut is really hard rn 😔💔😣anyways, i hope the loverboys and lovergirls are able to cheer everyone up a bit! ♥️ captain jeno is back with his freaky ass panty kink in this one heheheh

btw if you want a specific scenario with a specific couple, you can always leave the idea in my ask box! (i can’t promise i’ll write it, but if the idea really speaks to me, i might)

love tags: @dearlyminhyung @hyuckluvr-com @fancypeacepersona @chvngminz @hyunkaluv @iluvgnabnahc @n-jules @haesunlover2 @nottkwiwin @alexameliamg @ihatefrvits @amazinggraxia @karleereadssmut @drunkhee @bamjjwi @mahae @ncityswrid @jaeminiwrld @httpsxnox @blubb0 @pocketyoun @multifandomania @mey-archive @zuzu-the-simp @markiepoo4eva @jungwooie @kkyeoji @withapairofwings @cookydream @meowieshibal @remgeolli @yutasputa @kyungsooislifeu @dior-15 @hyucksnctzen @bridgertonletsgo @leleszn @hijjjjku7 9999 @afterhvours @mangoescrazy @vantxx95 @nctubatu

TAGLIST: CLOSED.

[sourrpatched]

𝐒𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞

PAIRING: drummer!Lee Jeno x fem!reader

SYNOPSIS: Lee Jeno is in desperate need of release. The problem is he’s not exactly stuck on the whole groupie concept, that’s where you come in. His bartender friend who’s a struggling writer that’s in need of some real inspiration. The suggestion is simple, friends with benefits. The only catch is, don’t fall in love, which should be easy considering the two of you have no intention of ever falling in love anyway.

WORD COUNT: 28k

WARNINGS: humor, fluff, angst (if you squint), smut (MDNI), public sex (does in a car count), unprotected sex (pls wrap it up), biting, fingering, oral (f!recieving), light sub/dom play, cum eating, mutual masterbation, these two are very dense, they’re also extremely silly

BEFORE YOU READ: reading the first story isn’t necessary but there are many appearances and references to things in the first one so to better understand read Francis Forever!

NOTES: I’m sooo sorry about the delay for this one but it’s here and instead of posting on friday i decided why not now! I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing!!

explore the 𝑹𝑶𝑪𝑲𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑹 𝑺𝑬𝑹𝑰𝑬𝑺 here!

spotify playlist that helped inspire me while writing can be found here

Part One: Early Spring

Sugar, we’re going down

 ☆ 📚 ☆

You stood in the center of the familiar crowded office, your lip in between your teeth as a sort of calming method. It was complete silence safe for the ticking of the clock that crescendoed with every second, building up your anticipation.

It was half past three which meant that if you were lucky, you’d have time to arrive home for a quick celebration with your cat, Meowy, before getting ready for your shift later tonight. You were confident this time, there were only so many mistakes you could’ve made after about ten different overviews of the same work.

The cough along with the sound of glasses hitting the table was enough for you to concede that the read through was complete. You were about to speak when the cherry haired woman spoke.

“No.”

Your feet would’ve collapsed into themselves if it wasn’t for the chair in front of you that your hands grasped at for dear life. You were sure she could hear the squeak of your last bit of humanity slipping away. 

“I must end it all,” your head shakes, refusing to meet the eyes of your friend, Shuhua.

She sighs, the scene in front of her reminiscent of the past few times you had asked her to read over your work. “Don’t be dramatic, get up.”

You stood up straight again, her soft nod a quiet way of telling you to take a seat. Ever since you were young you’d wanted to become a writer, and luckily enough working as a Bartender for one of the city's most frequented exclusive bars had its perks. You met Shuhua around the first month of working there, having built a friendship ever since she ordered a dirty martini. She was the owner of one of the biggest Publishing companies, and was very willing to help accomplish your dream.

Only that took way more effort than you ever thought possible. Shuhua was very confident in your work, the only problem was that she thought you weren’t being authentic enough. It wasn’t like you weren’t trying to, it’s just that sometimes work dragged on and took most of your energy for the day, and by the time you met the deadline, your work came out rushed in areas.

“Y/N,” Shuhua starts, your voice ringing out and cutting her off before she could continue. 

“It’s the Amusement Park scene right? I was half asleep when I wrote it that morning and I should’ve read over it again before printing it out.” You spit out, words tangled together because unfortunately you were always one to grow chatty when nervous.

“That’s not the problem,” Shuhua answers flatly. Your brows furrow. “Chapter thirty two.”

You flushed red, of course you knew what part that was. Not exactly because of it being your own writing, you could forget your own name if it weren’t for your nametag, but because it was the scene you dreaded most when you went over the draft.

Smut scene, not exactly your forte.

“Y/N, I mean this with all uttermost respect, are you even trying?” She flips open the book onto the page in question. “He kisses me. Very nicely.” She reads the words you wrote aloud and you could feel yourself sinking into the seat with every next sentence.

“I mean seriously,” She tosses the book down once again, “Is there a reason your skills become equivalent to that of a six year old when you write a smut scene?”

“I’d be concerned if a six year old was writing that.”

“You know what I mean,” She sighs, “Look Y/N I mean this as a friend, but even more as a publisher, I know you can do better than this. The rest of the novel is proof of that.”

You smile at the compliment. That means she at least liked the majority of the story. 

“Wipe that smile off of your face,” You frown again. “Tell me, what’s the problem? You can’t exactly have a smut book without any of the smut.”

It wasn’t that you weren’t trying to write smut, it had been the best way to navigate the built up emotions from both characters who seemingly hated each other before that, it was necessary. You hadn’t taken into account just how lacking you were in that department until you sat at four am, your computer brightness at full.

“The problem might be me,” You confess. “It’s not like I have much experience to base anything off of.”

Shuhua sighs, “No, that’s not your fault, some men don’t exactly offer the best services when it comes to getting off.” She meant that. It had been the topic of the first conversation you both shared after about three dirty martinis.

“Guess it doesn’t help that the closest I've been to touching a man’s body in a year is brushing hands with the DreamCafe cashier the other day.”

Shuhua’s gaze is pitiful, “Y/N, are you serious?” You nod. “God this is going to end up published five years from now if we keep up this pace.”

You purse your lips, not exactly knowing how to respond. Your list of experiences was about the size of a quick shopping list, and it wasn’t like you were against the idea of sex either, you just were a bit too busy to just go around looking for the first attractive man in your area. Most of the guys around were ugly too, and if they weren’t then they were clients at your workplace, which meant it was a no-go. 

The last thing you needed was to bump into a one night stand asking for a shot of whiskey. Besides you’d been hit on enough at your job to know that most men were way too easy, and something about that just grossed you out. Your friend's eyes brighten, an idea taking place in her mind that forms into a smirk on her face.

“What?” You ask, looking around the room as if it wasn’t just the two of you in there.

“I say this with all of my heart,” she raises a brow, “if you want a good story, you have got to get laid.”

You chuckle nervously, standing up and wiping off your pants. “No thank you!”

“Nope Y/N I’m serious,” She raises her voice slightly, she always did this with other clients but when it was directed to you it was a bit scary.  “Consider it. It might get your creative juices flowing.”

“I don’t really want to think about any juices right now.”

Shuhua rolls her eyes, picking up your paper and reaching forward to pass it to you. “You have amazing skill Y/N, I am not at all doubtful of that, but I think that this could help you sort things out better. If you don’t want to of course you don’t have to, but if that’s the case then I’d consider publishing this without the smut scenes.”

You were barely out of the door when you began contemplating her suggestion. The smut scene was necessary. There was zero way that you were going to publish the book without it, it would feel like you gave up if you did. 

You groaned loudly, the stares from the workers occupying the same elevator going unfazed with how deep in thought you were. Maybe Shuhua was right? Maybe hooking up with someone would make things easier for you as a writer. You always get the best inspiration when you force yourself to explore new things.

The only issue now was who would be your pick? The last thing you needed was to join a dating app and end up meeting a serial killer, you saw that in a movie once. Time felt like a ticking bomb now. If you wanted this book done by the end of the year, you had to do something about your problem, and you had to do it immediately.

☆ 🎸☆

The subtle bed squeaks and giggles were something Jeno usually had zero problem sleeping through, after all for a good few years he was the main person causing those noises. Countless hookups and one night stands he brought back to the shared apartment that he thought didn’t matter much anyway because the other guys were just as loud as he was, except for Jisung and Mark, and because it’s not like any of the girls they saw were here to stay.

He was regretful now as he laid in bed, his pillow squeezed tight around his ears to try and tune out the rest of the world from outside his bedroom door. Now the problem was simple, he was growing a bit more frustrated the past weeks. The rise of Oblivion was still subtle, but he wasn’t a stranger to the city anymore. 

And most would assume that was the best part of their growing fame but really it was the opposite. Jeno never really got the whole Groupie thing, sure he tried it a few times but really revisiting the same face every night wasn’t his style. Usually because it ended up causing assumptions to be made. Like your balls deep in a girl four times out of a week and suddenly she thinks that means that she can stay over and make you dinner, or call you baby and make arrangements to introduce you to her friends.

Jeno shuddered, the memory of Lia making him cringe. He had been in a dry spell ever since. It wasn’t so bad at first, Jeno was an introvert by nature so unless he was tagging along with Donghyuck and Jaemin at their club escapes he was pretty content staying home and hoping on league. But lately he felt like he was really going to go insane, it didn’t help that every other night there were enough sounds he was shocked there hadn’t been any noise complaints. 

Jaemin had suggested he just cave in, let the groupies run their course explaining that not all of them really searched for something more. Jeno declined. Jaemin wasn’t much of a convincing person when he had a stalker problem not even three months ago. 

But now as he hopes that the pillow on his face can cut off enough of the oxygen in his body to have him pass out for at least a couple of hours so he wouldn’t have to hear the monstrosities happening outside, he thinks maybe it would’ve been better if he did have a hookup he could meet up with right about now just to save his eardrums.

He decided for the next best option. Going on a walk and making his grand escape hopefully before the funny business got any louder. He shoved off the pillow, pulling up his phone to check the time. Right on schedule. 

Jeno tried to open and close the door quietly enough to make his presence unknown, but unfortunately the great squeak from the hinges had betrayed him. Causing both his friend, Jisung, and Jisung’s girlfriend to shoot up from where they sat very comfortably on one another on the couch, in a position that made Jeno wish his vision was worse than it already was.

“I- Jeno! When did you get here?” Jisung stuttered, his cheeks growing red by the second.

“Never left,” Jeno shrugged, “sup Darling.”

The girl only smiled tightly, refusing to meet his eyes after he’d caught the two in a compromising position. Jisung scowled, not a fan of how popular the nickname had become within the group of guys since he’s the one that created it in the first place. There was no use in arguing against it now though, not when their fans had already began to implement the nickname themselves. 

“Y’know if you’re going to fuck it would probably be better not to on the couch, it’s kind of a general rule.” One that Jeno could attest to never breaking.

“We weren’t going to–“ Jisung’s brows furrowed in annoyance? It was always so easy to tease the guy. He took a breath instead, ignoring the obvious bait. “It’s four pm, you do understand that right?”

“Yep,” Jeno starts, “Late night.”

Usually Late Night was code for a more rated R style of living. Now poor loser Jeno used the term for what were nights of binge watching Formula One Race highlights and an occasional jackoff session when he really couldn’t sleep. What? It was scientifically proven that release made for better sleep quality.

Darling chose to finally speak then, “Tomorrow you should post a picture or something, fans are wondering what their favorite drummer has been up to.”

He cringed, not too sure just how much fans would be interested in his new super boring lifestyle. “Yeah sure, i’ll get to that.” He could probably just take some pictures today while he’s out running to post for later. “Everyone else out?”

Jisung nods, his attention on the TV as he scrolls through what shows and movies were suggested. “I think Mark went to go help his mom back home today and Jaemin tagged along.”

“He’s not trying to get into Mark’s noonas pants anymore right?”

Jisung chuckles, “No, pretty sure she’s engaged now.”

In Jeno’s humble opinion as a twenty five year old, engagement at twenty six seemed pretty soon but to each their own. No seriously, because his parents themselves were pretty adamant on him finding a potential girlfriend and or wife soon. 

He shakes off the thought, “Hyuck?”

“Who knows, the guy has been way too secretive lately for someone who loves to be in everyone else’s business.”

“You’re still mad he tried joining us on our first date?” Darling reached forward tugging on Jisung’s cheek, a smile on full display.

Jisung rolled his eyes, “Tried is an understatement, he literally sat at the table right next to us.”

Darling only cooed at him, the two becoming lost in their own little world of smiles and extreme public display of affection. Jeno held back a groan of annoyance, instead choosing peace. Since it was late that at least meant that he had time to stop by the bar, he was pretty sure you were scheduled to work today also so why not make things better by venting all of his problems with a couple of drinks in between.

“I’m going out,” He announced to nobody apparently since neither one of them spared him short of a glance. 

Apparently tonight was an exception to an empty club, what with being a Thursday. He’d made an entrance and beelined directly to the bar, which was a bit busier than he usually found it.

You were busy serving up someone’s drink to notice him, a man who stared at you a bit longer than some may deem normal. It wasn’t long until you slid over a glass to the man, who took it with a small glint in his eye and offered up a piece of paper before whispering to you and walking away.

“What’s that about?” Jeno asked curiously, though he was sure he knew exactly what it was about.

You barely flinched, having already noticed his presence before he spoke. “Number,” You groaned before throwing it into the trash, “Why are all of these rich folks so greedy. I work for tips not for numbers.”

Jeno laughs, “Oh I'm sure he wanted to give you a tip alright.”

You deadpanned, already concocting his drink of choice, “You’re here early.”

“Couldn’t exactly get anything else done,” He smiled sweetly in thanks as you slid over the glass.

You giggled, knowing exactly what he was implying. “Donghyuck?”

“Worse, Jisung.” 

That got your attention, the shock in your face masked by your hand coming up to stop yourself from laughing. “Wait really?”

“Unfortunately,” Jeno sighs, “It seems he’s been getting more action than me nowadays.”

Your brows furrow, “Is Lee Jeno in a dry spell?”

“The worst kind,” He groaned, downing the rest of the drink with a quick chug. “I mean seriously, you know how tired my wrist is?”

You laugh, “Whatever happened with Lia?”

Jeno let out another sigh, “Didn’t last long at all. None of them do, at some point they think that they’ll get a little love story when I make it very clear from the start that i’m in no way looking for anything like that. Doesn’t help that because of Jisung and Darling, people assume the rest of us are looking for that.”

“Ah yes,” You slide over another serving you must’ve mixed while he started his rant. “Who would dare assume a twenty five year old wants to settle down.”

“I’m serious,” You chuckle, proceeding to make another person drink while he continues to rant. “It’s like no matter how up front I am about only wanting casual sex people expect to change my mind. It’s exhausting.”

“Tell me about it,” You sigh, “The persistence of some men around here really does give me the creeps. The other day I had to ask Heejin to walk me to my car cause this guy kept saying he would see me after my shift.”

Jeno frowns in concern, “You could’ve called me to pick you up.”

You shrug it off, “It was late anyway, and I had things to take care of.”

“Ah,” Jeno laughs, “You’re still working on that porno.”

“Will you shut up?” You look around frightened that anyone overheard him, lucky for you the crowd had died down.

“Have a drink with me?”

You raise a brow. “I’m on the clock.”

“Then after.” Jeno replies, taking another sip from his glass.

“I’m not drinking that fuck ass poison you sip on.”

He holds back a laugh, “You forget you’re the one who invented it.”

The memory springs to life, the first time you’d practiced mixing drinks for your bartender certification and Jeno being your willing subject. In his defense, he could handle his liquor quite a bit, and being young and broke meant that he’d take any ounce of free alcohol necessary.

You had mixed the worst kinds of alcohols together, whiskeys and tequila stirred into a concoction that somehow looked purple. Jeno had taken a careful sip, not before asking you just how safe it was, and though it must’ve been the most awful thing he’d ever tasted he couldn’t help but give you a shaky thumbs up. You’d been so excited to make your own recipe, and he was in no way going to burst your bubble.

It became his drink of choice since then, and despite the fact that you had tried it for the first time a year ago and realized just how disgusting it was, he continued to order it anyway. Maybe it grew on him, or maybe he just happened to succumb to Stockholm syndrome. Nevertheless, it was still his first choice.

“Yeah and i’ve since then improved, thank you very much,” You wring out a rag to clean up the table where some drunk had spilled a bit of his beer on the counter.

Jeno hums, “So then why don’t you prove it to me? Drinks later?”

You roll your eyes, never really able to say no to him. “If you can wait a couple of more hours.”

He nods, his eye smile mimicking that of a crescent moon. “Done.”

 ☆ 📚 ☆

Your shift went by quicker once Jeno had stopped by. Most of the drinks for the rest of the night were easy shots of whiskey that you served for the other customers besides him since you’d planned on drinking together. And it was nice, being able to make a bit of casual conversation in between working. It was always a relief when Jeno visited, even if that meant he teased you out loud a few times even in front of customers.

Luckily for him, you spared him a beating because he promised to buy your favorite. Somaek.

“I still remember when you would gag every time I ordered a beer,” Jeno jokes, poking at the last piece of fried chicken from the take out you guys had picked up before arriving at your own place. 

You laughed, louder than you had to because alcohol always had a way of making you giggle over any and everything. “I told you, when you mix Soju you can’t taste the gross beer flavor.”

Jeno hums, smiling at you as you devoured the chicken like it was the last meal on earth. His smile quickly vanished when he got a notification on his phone, the brightness only peeking for a second before he clicked his phone off.

“Who is it?”

“Lia,” Jeno groans, “she wants to know if i’d be down to meet up.” You hum, taking a last swig of your glass of somaek. “The worst part is if I were even slightly more tipsy, I think I would’ve caved in.

“You’re insane,” You laugh, the man only meeting your eyes with a look of desperation.

“Yeah unfortunately.”

You pause for a moment, your mind trying to fight against oversharing because when you were about two drinks in you got to that point. Ultimately you lost the internal battle. 

“I’m not having too good of luck in that department either,” You match Jeno’s energy with a sigh. “What makes it worse is that Shuhua says I gotta get laid cause it’s making my book bland.”

He coughs, “What?”

“Yeah,” You continue. “Don’t laugh but I've been really struggling writing a few of the more.. intense scenes. I’m really trying though, it’s just the idea of sex with a random stranger really is weirding me out. Then there’s the deadline, I wanted to have this done by the end of the year but Shuhua’s convinced that unless I get hands on inspiration then i’m totally fucked. Not literally but figuratively—“

“Wait wait wait,” Jeno interrupts you. “You’re telling me Shuhua told you to find somebody to fuck or kiss the book deal goodbye?”

“No? She said I could always just take out any sex scenes.”

Jeno snaps his fingers then, raising his glass to his lips. “But you’re perverted and refuse to.”

You frown, “I’m not perverted! Last I checked i’m not some freak who got hard on a carnival ride.” The memory of Disco pang pang was horrifying at the time it happened, now it was funny to look back on. Especially when you used it against him.

Jeno flushes red, “I told you to stop with that already! I wasn’t hard, it was my phone in my pocket.”

“Yeah sure thing neno,” You winked, pouring yourself another two to three ratio of soju and beer, Jeno’s hand subtly moving to help steady the glass as you poured the shot of soju into it.

“You’re irritating,” He rolled his eyes, though you could tell by the small smile tugging on the corner of his mouth that he was far from being angry at all. It’s just the way the two of you teased one another.

“And you,” you raise your glass like you were making a toast. “need to get laid.”

He lets out a dry chuckle, raising his own drink to clink yours. “Can’t argue with that.”

As you sip down the now room temperature beer, the bitter taste hardly effective since you were now tipsy enough you could hardly taste alcohol, an idea hit you straight on like a bus. You eyed the man in front of you, him being completely clueless to how you were observing him like he was a science experiment.

He was busy calling out meowy’s name with a few psst psst in between to get her to stop playing hard to get and let him pet her. By the time he set your cat onto his lap your mouth spoke before your brain could stop it.

“We should have sex!”

Jeno’s eyes widened tenfold, and because of how you’d forgotten to adjust your volume before speaking, meowy became startled and ran straight out of the living room space and into your bedroom.

His silence lasted long enough for you, despite the cloudy mind, to understand just how bizarre the suggestion was without any explanation. So you gave him just that. 

“Think about it neno,” The usage of the childish pet name in this topic of discussion caused you to slightly cringe. “You need to get laid because your brain refuses to function without direct stimulation to your– thing.” You emphasized the word by jerking your hand forward in the direction of his crotch. “And I need to get laid so I can get inspiration for my book!”

The man was too stunned to speak, his hands coming up to his face to rub at his eyes like this was a dream. Unfortunately for him, it was not. “You can’t be serious.” He finally speaks.

You nod, “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I don’t know y/n maybe because i’m your best friend and I don't think we’ve ever seen each other in that way?”

Now it’s your turn to roll your eyes, “There’s no romance to this at all. Sure attraction plays a subtle part in this but it’s mostly about trust.” He sits still for a moment, pondering. 

“We don’t have to, it was just a suggestion.”

You say it as if the words that left your mouth weren’t just a ticking time bomb in Jeno’s poor mind. You took another swig of your drink, falling into the same ordinary rhythm the two of you had from earlier.

Jeno speaks up barely holding in a cough when he asks, “Trust?”

You nod again, “I don’t really want to just sleep with just any guy, most of them don’t even know how to please a woman let alone charm them. I need inspiration, not regrets.”

Jeno smiles at that, “So you’re saying I know how to please women?”

Instead of falling into his bait you offer a shrug, "I've heard word, why? You saying what I heard is wrong?”

He chuckles lightly ignoring your dig, “Not at all. Just taking precaution. Wouldn’t want you to end up like Lia.”

You suck your teeth in annoyance, “You wouldn’t have to worry about anything, it’s not like it would change anything.”

“Y/N,” He calls your name again. Only this time there’s no teasing, no mocking. “You do realize that sex can change a lot of things for some people.” He speaks honestly, most of it coming from experience of countless horror hookup stories you’d heard first hand time and time again. “I trust you a lot, and i’m not against the idea but I don’t want things to ever get weird for either of us,” Jeno sighs. “The last thing I want is to make things complicated.”

“Well then it’s a good thing that none of us are looking for anything more than sex.” You reply directly. “The best part is it shouldn’t be awkward at all, we know each other well enough.”

Jeno takes a moment, a deep breath of consideration while you’re busy swirling your glass around. 

“Okay,” He answers, your gaze falling over to him in an instant. “We can talk more about this later then, when you’re not drunk.”

“I’m not drunk.”

He hums, “How many fingers?” He asks as innocent as ever, contradictory to his middle finger standing straight and tall in your face.

“One,” You answer, shoving his hand away. “and you can shove it up your ass, asshole.”

He smirks, “According to our earlier conversation you’d probably prefer it up yours.”

“Motherfucker—“

“I’m serious though Y/N, we can talk more about this later.”

You frown. “Fine,” You stand up from where you sat on the floor, “then i’m going to bed.”

“Go ahead,” He says it like it’s his own house. “I’ll clean this up.”

“Sure,” You reply, stretching your arms and legs before heading for your bedroom. “Use the spare by the way, don’t go home this late.”

You were able to afford an apartment with a spare bedroom, one that Jeno often occupied. Especially these days with how many people were staying in the band’s shared apartment these days. 

“Yeah yeah, make sure not to sleep on your back, the last thing I want to wake up to is you dead from choking on your own vomit.”

“Don’t say things like that!” You shout in disgust, earning a laugh from him.

“Goodnight neno.”

“Night, Princess.”

☆ 🎸☆

Jeno always knew you were unpredictable, but this moment really took the cake. 

He had cleaned up your apartment, figuring that the more he kept his mind occupied the less he had to actually overthink the arrangement you had suggested.

On one hand, the message was clear. You both got along so well because of how similar the two of you viewed the world. Hookups were nothing more than a sense of relief for you both, so as much as he loved to tease, he knew that there really was nothing to worry about. The other hand was complicated because for some reason he began to over analyze everything. 

How would this work? Would the act itself be awkward? Would this ruin your friendship? Is this a one and done deal?

There were too many variables to consider, and Jeno wasn’t sure how this would go about if you weren’t just talking out of your drunk mind and really meant it. He took a deep breath as he stared into the mirror in your bathroom, setting down the toothbrush he had there because of course he had his own.

And as he laid in the spare bedroom, the subtle scent of your lavender sheets filling his brain, he chose to do what was either going to be the worst mistake in his life, or the best.

Really though, what was the worst thing that could happen? The both of you have sex and hate it?

“I stand by what I said,” You mumbled over the spoon in your mouth. “I think it could do us both good.”

Jeno had barely gotten the sentence out when you brought up the question again, this time over breakfast without any alcohol in your system to use as a cushion in case Jeno declined. Though Jeno wasn’t too sure you needed it anyway.

You were firm with your question, not in a way that made him feel like he had to agree but instead as if it was a simple request such as, What should we have for dinner? and not Do you want to have casual sex?

“You don’t have to agree with me, I can always figure out a solution to my own problems and I'm sure you’d have zero problems in that department either.” You added, looking over his arms that were pretty distracting. He was wearing a sleeveless tank top, the shirt of his he left with a pile of clothing, largely consisting of hoodies you had borrowed and forgot to give back, and clothes he kept at your place for the times he would stay over.

The issue was the opposite. Jeno has had many problems in that department lately.

“Okay,” Jeno begins, clearing his throat. You reacted with wide eyes. “Yeah sure why not?”

You smile happily, as if he’d surprised you with an all paid trip to the Bahamas or something. “Jeno, you have no idea how much this is going to help me!”

He frowns, surely you couldn’t be that inexperienced. The two of you had countless stories shared. You especially had a habit of rambling about. 

“Wait,” You hop out of your seat. “We need to make a list of rules!” Before Jeno can comment you’re already running to your room, returning slightly breathless with a pen and paper in hand. 

You set it down on the table slowly beginning to move the pen drawing line after line, your writing was surprisingly messy for someone who was an author. Jeno didn’t comment on it though, he doesn’t have time when you’re already pushing him further down the dining bench, scooting closer to him as you set down the paper that now reads. 

Rules for our arrangement.

“What’s this?” Jeno asks, earning a bored look from you that translates to, are you really asking?

“Rules, I think it’ll be best so we can note our boundaries before just hopping into things.” Your smile is tight but genuine, which only makes Jeno realize just how nervous you really are. You weren’t the type to show your fears, but you were always one to be cut and clear about anything else you felt. 

Jeno nods along, smiling softly in hopes that it’ll help you feel less awkward. “Okay, what do you have in mind?”

You smile widely, this time with full fledged confidence. “I’m glad you asked. So for starters, I think it’s best we start this arrangement with a few notes on what we are okay with and things we aren’t okay with.”

“Like?” Jeno asks before taking a sip of water out of his cup.

“Like, Anal!” Jeno chokes on the beverage, coughing repeatedly to regain composure. His scene doesn’t alarm you much, so you press further. “I don’t ever want anything up there.” You state flatly.

“Sure,” He nods, having cleared his throat and this time taking a sip to fully clear out his throat. “it’s not really my thing either.”

“Great.” You write down the first rule, Sex will only involve things the both of us are okay with. And in parenthesis: No Anal.

“Is there anything you wouldn’t want to do?” You question him. Jeno tries to think, it’s a bit harder to think about when you’re put on the spot. There’s nothing he’s too uncomfortable with that he wouldn’t just say in the moment, so he opts for the obvious answer.

“No Anal.”

You let out a laugh, “Great I guess we're both on the same page then.”

This felt almost ridiculous, but as long as you were happy he wasn’t going to question much. “Another thing, I need your permission to allow all of our uh– experiences to be used as inspiration for my novel.”

“I know Y/N trust me i’m cool with it.”

“Okay because the last thing i’d want is for you to be offended or upset if I write something you disagree with.”

Jeno shook his head, “Nothing to be ashamed of, I have quite the reputation i’ve upkept.”

You scowled, his cocky attitude baiting your reaction. “Okay, but don’t be offended when I make sure to add your size.”

“Is that supposed to be a threat? Because I can show you now if you’d like.” Jeno replies mockingly, reaching for his shorts.

You reach to stop his hand, “Let’s keep it in your pants at least a little while longer.” He shrugs, his arms folding around his waist as you write.

“Are there any rules you want to add?”

Jeno ponders for a moment. There wasn’t much he thought he could add with all seriousness. The situation itself was not very serious on his part, sleeping with a close friend all because he couldn't find a regular hookup who didn’t want dinner dates and eventual marriage? He felt pretty ridiculous, but since you had been the one to suggest it, it at least kept him from feeling like a weirdo. 

There was one thing he needed as a rule, something that would give him peace of mind going into this arrangement.

“We have to separate our sex life and our friendship.” He spoke after some time. You had met his eyes with a brow raised.

“I’m sure that’ll be a bit difficult considering we’re going to be friends who fuck.” You joke.

He lets out a small chuckle, before adding with complete sincerity. “I think it’s important that we keep both our sexual life and our friendship separate. There’s no reason to let any of it get mumbled and jumbled, that's why friends with benefits never work.”

“Right,” You breathe out. “So then you’d prefer?”

“I’d prefer that no matter what happens, things won’t ever change. No matter what. Even if we stop sleeping together, we need to remain friends.” 

It wasn’t just a request, what he wanted was a promise. One on paper that was needed in the rare case that everything went to shit. He wouldn’t be able to agree to it at all if that wasn’t agreed upon.

You met his eyes, a reassuring smile on your face. “Then if at any point any one of us want out,” You scribble down the rest in handwriting he could hardly understand. “or for any other reason, we talk to each other.”

The room was met with silence as you finished writing down everything, reading it over like it was one of the ten commandments until the two of you had it ingrained in your brains. 

The quietness only broke when Jeno laughed aloud after teasing you by moving his thumb away from the ink you had to stamp his fingerprint on the paper. All uneasiness or anxieties vanished just like that, the two of you rebooting back into your playful dynamic.

“There!” You exclaimed happily once Jeno gave in and allowed you to bring his red stamped finger onto the paper. 

Jeno hardly had time to admire you, his phone alarm going off reminding him of the Band’s practice today. He locked his phone, the blasting sound coming to a quick halt in an instant.

“I have to go now.” Jeno stood up from the seat, sliding across the floor easily even while you were still sitting. 

“Wait!” You stuttered, a blush reaching your face as all nervousness came back in full force. “Uh. When did you want to start? Y’know.. doing.. stuff.”

Jeno had to use every fiber of his being to resist making fun of you. “Whenever you want to.”

You nodded. “Then how about tomorrow? I don’t have work so we could maybe, I don't know, go out?”

Yeah, Jeno really had to use the last of his restraint. He chose to laugh instead, “You trying to ask me out on a date?”

You scowled, “I’m just trying to set the mood.”

“Yeah i’m not sure that’s how friends with benefits really works,” He says too casually for someone who has never been in that arrangement until now.

“Right.” You reply.

“Y/N,” he calls out. “You can just call whenever you want to.”

He hopes the implication is clear.

“Sure, you too.”

With the way you look at him he knows that you understood. There’s a quick goodbye before Jeno is out the door. He hopes the guys don’t mind his slight tardiness, though if he’s serious almost all of the group had a problem being late to practice.

He feels a bit of relief, the two of you having found solutions to your growing problems. Well, at least a bit of his growing problems, but it wasn’t something he’d like to dwell on at the moment. 

There wasn’t much anxiety, at least on his part, more so the awkwardness radiating off of you not knowing how to start but he was sure that the feeling would shrink with time. If he weren’t booked and busy with practice at the moment, he would’ve probably tried easing your embarrassment using a different method. That was mostly him thinking with his dick, which nobody could blame him for, it had been a pretty hard couple of months.

All in all, Jeno couldn’t feel more confident. It was a win-win situation, and since the both of you had agreed and talked everything over he was sure that nothing would go wrong.

☆ 📚 ☆

The moment Jeno had left your home, you let out a deep sigh. 

To be completely honest, you had woken up this morning pulling the hair from your head as memories flooded your mind. You weren’t even sure you had wanted to step out of your bedroom hearing the man lurk around the place from behind the door. 

You debated resting until he finally gave up and left, but the growl your tummy had let out at the smell of everything delicious wafting into your room had caused you to cave in.

On the bright side, as much as you were stupid and impulsive, he’d actually agreed. It saved you the embarrassment of being rejected, not to brag but that wasn’t something you were accustomed to experiencing. And now all of it was hitting you, at full force.

Friends with benefits.

You genuinely had zero clue just how that worked, did this mean that now at any time either one of you could just call on one another like a booty call? You let out a sigh, Meowy let out a meow in response, like she was asking where the man had gone.

You weren’t quite sure that you made the best decision, but only time would tell. For now you could feel ease creeping up your spine, this would solve one problem for now and in the worst case scenario, it would probably end in bad sex. 

It was a chance you were more than willing to make.

There was nothing that could’ve mentally prepared you for heading into this type of arrangement. And no it wasn’t the friendship thing, it was not knowing just how to jump start into sex without looking insane.

The two of you sat in your living room, barely any distance between the two of you where you lay on the floor, watching the TV. Which was ironically out of the norm when the two of you were usually cuddling during your movie marathons. Everything felt off, even the movie playing on the TV that truthfully you randomly picked and now realized was definitely not something you were rating higher than one star on Letterboxd later.

Meowy had made herself a bit too comfortable with Jeno. Lying on his lap like nothing mattered in the world more than his hands petting her. Ridiculously enough, you felt a short wave of envy, shoving that feeling down immediately because in what world would you be jealous of your cat for living carelessly.

You were sure it had been almost an hour of just sitting next to each other, not a single one of you moving a single bone in your body. You were pretty sure he was waiting for a signal, but every time you had the nerve to try, you shrank in on yourself in an instant, overthinking everything. It was like the moment had long passed, that was until the worst thing imaginable happened.

There were moans blaring out of the TV, the movie having shifted from its weird cultish horror vibe into a porno. Meowy wasn’t a fan of the shift in volume, hopping off of your friend and walking away into her cat bed. You cursed silently, of course your cat would leave you to fend for yourself.

The uncomfortable silence filled the room, safe for the excruciatingly long sex scene playing out in front of you that felt like it was mocking you. You were suddenly thankful the room was dim enough that your redness would go unseen.

“Are you trying to subliminally tell me something?” Jeno whispered, his voice too close to your ear that only made you blush harder.

You refused to meet his gaze, if you did then you’d lose the last of your dignity. For a moment you weren’t sure how to reply, deciding to use all of your strength to sound as confident as ever.  “If I was then would that finally get the ball rolling?”

He chuckled, his hand suddenly slipping around your waist. “Is that what you were waiting for?”

There were always times where the two of you would have a conversation and he’d allow his cocky nature to slip out. This time felt different though, it was like the room shifted with his tone.

“Yes.”

His eyes widened at your response, a slight falter from not having expected you to be so honest. “Then I'm sorry I kept you waiting.” He answers truthfully. His arms suddenly pull you closer to sit on his lap. The same arms that he left on full display with his sleeveless shirt, it really didn’t make things any easier for you. You’d been making subtle glances at them hoping he was into manhandling, which seems now you were right.

“How should I make it up to you?” He tilts your chin up with his fingers. Your faces are only inches apart. Damn he was good at this. You were aware of his game, you’d seen it play out many times in person. But why did it suddenly feel so different when it was directed at you? You suck in a breath, his thumb tracing the side of your stomach louder than the long forgotten movie playing behind you. 

“Y/N,” He calls your name. “We don’t have to do anything.” His voice is soft and reassuring, only adding fuel into the growing heat.

“I want to, it's just,” You frown, hoping you don’t sound ridiculous. “I don’t know how to start.”

He nods in understanding, his palm wrapping around your cheek. “Do you want me to lead?”

“Please.” 

You were sure you came off a bit more desperate than you meant to, but with the way his hips suddenly shifted just a fraction gave you the feeling he wasn’t complaining.

“Okay.” His voice is featherlight, you could feel his breath quicken as he closes the distance between you. “Then is this okay?” He asks, his thumb still tracing over your body, now fixated on the lower curve of your back.

You barely manage to nod before he’s connecting his mouth onto yours, a short peck to feel out the action before fully engaging. If any of your worries still existed they were certainly gone now, tuned out by the heavy beating of your heart. You leaned forward this time, your lips meeting this time with much less hesitation.

Jeno brought his right hand up to cup your face, his left hand around your waist, the grip firm to hold you in place. His teeth bite into your bottom lip, pulling a tiny gasp from you just to slide his tongue over the skin. You take that as a challenge, meeting him with your own eagerness and sliding your own tongue into his to deepen the kiss.

He groans, his hips shifting you into a more comfortable position on him. You’re not sure how many seconds pass like that. You slightly grind against him, the simple peck from earlier turned into a full on makeout session. Your hands fondling his arms to keep yourself from losing all of your balance as it grows heated. And just as your chest begins to tighten with every breath of yours being stolen by him, he pulls away.

You take in a deep breath trying to steady yourself, his eyes meeting yours with a question. One that you already have an answer to.

“Bedroom.”

The word comes out rushed and whiny, earning a low chuckle from him before he lifts you up with him. You had of course made out with people before, most of that happening in your early college years but this time was different. Jeno had taken your breath away but with that all motor function too, you noticed it now as your feet felt way too light.

He must’ve picked up on it, instead lifting you into his arms like you weighed equivalent to a pillow to him, and heading straight towards your bedroom. “Neno–“ You squeaked out, caught off guard by his sudden action. You couldn’t see his face from how he was carrying you over his shoulder but you were sure he was giving his signature samoyed smile.

You were proved right a moment later as he steadily set you down onto your bed. “Tell me, Princess, just how many book drafts of yours played out like this?”

Your cheeks reddened, he was spot on with the question. Male lead plopping the Main Character onto the bed before pounding into her with zero warning. The only thing that was missing was the use of his belt as a restraint for the main character’s hands. As much as that sounded interesting though, it was a little too early to hop into something as complex as that. So for the meantime, this would do.

It must’ve been a rhetorical question, since he doesn’t give you time to answer before he's lifting your shirt up and off your body. You pull him in for another kiss, all tongue and teeth, your patience growing thin with every second building up. You let out a happy sound, one that he drinks up, one hand sliding against your back to unclasp your bra in a quick second.

You push him back, noting the messy hair and the way his chest is practically begging for air. “You are way too good at that.”

“What can I say, i’ve had some practice.” He replies, meeting your mouth for a deep but short kiss compared to the ones before. You get the memo and start removing your own bra, discarding it onto the floor. But as a simple minded woman who believes in equality, and seriously loves a nice chest even on a man, you lift his shirt up all the same, meeting your own pair of fabric somewhere you couldn’t care less about.

He detaches from your lips, his mouth leaving kisses around your neck before slowly making it down to your breasts. “Fuck, you’re just as beautiful as I imagined.”

“Have you imagined me in this position on multiple occasions?” You tease, not expecting an answer.

“Only since I had to leave you to go practice when we signed our lives away.”

“That was only a day ago.”

“Really? It felt way longer than that.” Your words catch in your throat with how close his breath is over your sensitive nipple, every nerve in your body on standby waiting for him to do something. Lucky you, he doesn’t leave you waiting any longer. His mouth connecting around your chest and sucking harsh enough to make you moan.

The pleasure is foreign to you, the only experience you had being your own hands pinching against your chest whenever you seeked pleasure by yourself. Other men had usually disregarded that part of your body at all, unless of course they used it to their own benefit, squeezing onto your chest as if it were their own personal stressball. With every lick to your nub it sent a jolt to your body, growing hotter. 

You could barely keep your eyes open now, focusing all of your attention on keeping the noise down because it wasn’t like you owned the house, it was rented. Jeno’s hand snakes down again, this time sliding through the elastic waistband of your shorts, tracing the thin fabric of your panties slick with your arousal.

“Neno please,” You whine, your hips growing weak even to the slightest touch of his fingers against you, subconsciously trying to grind down on his hands.

He detaches from your lips, his gaze hazy while he meets yours. You can already feel the ache on your chest from the littered bruises he’s left forming. Jeno must be growing impatient too, because he’s pulling down your shorts at your plea in record breaking time. 

“Lube?”

“The bottom drawer to the right.”

The loss of his touch feels like an eternity of hell until he’s back again. Your cunt clenching against nothing as his hand pushes your legs further apart. You have to give yourself a moment to calm your nerves, the sound of the bottle opening signaling them to come back at full force.

“Fuck baby,” Jeno starts. “We might not even need that much with how wet you are for me.”

As cocky as he sounds, it only fuels your fire. Fuck Jeno for living up to his expectations without even having fucked you yet. You already felt stupid enough.

He slides a finger through the lace fabric, shoving it to the side as his middle finger pushes through your folds, the bed talk stalling you for long enough to warm the lube he’d gathered onto his fingers. It worked well, your cunt squeezing around his finger from where he curled it up. His fingers were much thicker than yours, a feeling you hadn’t felt in quite a while because you’d been the one prepping yourself most of the time.

“Another one please,” You breathe out. His ringer finger pushes in next, filling you up more and causing another moan to push past your lips. 

“You’re so tight,” He mutters, his eyes zoned in on the way your cunt sucks in his fingers. His hand is moving on its own then, dragging slowly out of you before pushing in with more force. You let out another whine, your thighs threatening to shut on instinct to which he pinches them.

You wince, caught off guard by the sudden sharp pain as he smoothes his finger over the spot. “Keep them open, be a good girl and do that for me.”

The nickname does something to you, call it a hidden praise kink you hadn’t even realized you had until now. Jeno’s fingers are moving with much more pace now, not enough to completely satisfy you but enough to have you seconds from begging for more. His mouth clashes against yours again, swallowing every low noise you make as his fingers scissor you apart, and when he finally adds the third finger you feel seconds away from snapping. 

You accidentally bite down on his lip, a warm metallic taste meeting your mouth that you can’t help but to taste more of. Jeno has no issue with this, the thrust of his fingers getting more urgent than before, his tongue begging to taste more of his own blood mixed with the sugary taste you have from snacking on artificially flavored gummies.

“Fu–nghh— neno”

You’re close, and all it takes is one sharp thrust of his fingers curling right into the spot you needed him most to have you finishing. Your eyes rolling back with the very welcome feeling of your orgasm washing over you.

His fingers continue to move, dragging out your pleasure for as long as he could until you're wincing from the overstimulation to which he removed them, your cunt suddenly far too empty. You feel like your soul has been knocked out of your body, taking a few deep breaths to gather the last of your energy.

“Are you okay?”

The chuckle slips out of your lips before you can even stop it. “Dude you just made me cum from your fingers alone and you’re asking that?”

Jeno looks around, confused on how that’s a shocking revelation. “Yes?”

You sigh, “I’m okay, just need a moment.” You open your eyes, his large frame still holding your thighs apart in between you. You probably shouldn’t laugh at a moment like this, but he really looks just like an obedient puppy waiting for your next move. 

He catches the smile on your face, his expression growing confused. “What?”

“Nothing, you just look really cute right now.”

He frowns, “Aren’t I supposed to look hot and sexy and so unresistable you can’t help but climb onto me?”

You shrug, “sure you look all of those things too.” 

His frown deepens, he cups your hands with his own, holding them on either side of you, Not rough at all, if you wanted to you could move him off of you, but a part of you really liked the illusion of him pinning you down. Perhaps another time he’d really use all of his strength, now that idea sent another wave of arousal in between your legs.

Jeno catches on quickly, how can he not with the way you’re squirming around. “You like being manhandled?” 

You don’t answer. You trace over his body instead, eyeing the very prominent bulge in his pants. Since your legs were free now you bring up your knee, rubbing it ever so slightly against him. He shutters at the contact.

“Neno,” You whisper his name like it was a prayer. “I think i’m ready for the next round.”

He lets out a short laugh, though there’s hardly any humor in his tone whatsoever. You take note of his ears, the faint pink from how badly he must’ve been holding back. If you were reading him correctly, that meant he was probably too close to snapping. You were thankful he was focused on your knee rubbing against him, cause if he saw your expression now it would’ve given yourself away.

He lets go of where he had your hands, giving you the opportunity to wrap them around him and feel up his muscles you’d been way too distracted earlier to fully admire. 

“Fuck–“ He groans. The sound like music to your ears and further encouraging you to touch him. He pulls his shorts down slightly, revealing the waistband of his boxers, the print of his dick making your mouth water.

You’re already reaching forward, cupping him firmly. A wince sounding from his lips. “Can I?”

He nods. You hook down the fabric, his thick and needy cock slapping against him fully erect and flushed against him. You pump him twice, using your other hand to reach for the condom he’d grabbed earlier when he got the bottle of lube.

There was no going back after this, you did realize that as you rolled the condom down onto him. “You’re sure about this?” He asked one last time, his breathing heavy waiting for your answer to finally cave in.

“Never been more sure.” Within the next second you feel the stretch as he pushes into you, your cunt squeezing his thick girth inches at a time until your hips meet his own. He gives you enough time to adjust, kissing down the side of your shoulder to help calm your nerves.

It’s far from your first time, but this was nothing like any of the men you’d had before. His size fills you up in all of the ways you’d only thought possible in some kind of fairy tale.

The sound of your name being called makes you open your eyes that you hadn’t even realized were shut. You clench around him unintentionally, pulling a groan from his throat that only feeds your confidence. You could tell based off of how his arms tightened their hold around you, how wrecked he was. 

“You can move.”

He wastes no time, setting a slow pace that somehow drives him directly to your sweet spot. He’s way less quieter than you’d assumed he’d be in bed, his noises low yet heavy, matching your moans as he continues to thrust inside you.

It doesn’t take long for you to feel your orgasm approaching once more. And with how patient he’d been, it was like a prayer had been answered. 

“Neno I- I’m—“

“I know baby me too,”

With an embarrassing amount of thrusts the two of you came undone together. His mouth landing on yours to capture the last of your screams as your pussy clenched around him with your release, triggering him to finish into the condom.

After a quick moment of the two of you registering everything, you can’t help but laugh, Jeno's wounded expression only causing you to laugh more. 

“I’m sorry it’s just,” You catch your breath, stopping yourself from looking any more insane than you probably did now. “Fuck, those girls were really not lying.” His head tilted in confusion. “You really are big.”

He laughs then, "That's really nice and all but if you keep saying things like that I might have another problem.” He replies, referring to the fact that he’d just come once and was not quite ready for another round.

“What’s that saying? What’s one’s problem is another's solving?” You smirk.

He scoffs, pulling out of you with a swift action that makes you wince. “You could barely last one round, save it for next time.”

“Me?” You gasp. Jeno stands up already having discarded the condom in your trash. He’s reaching for his boxers from the ground to put on as some kind of shield. You were a bit disappointed, his size while soft was surprisingly just as impressive as it was when it was hard. “I came twice!”

He’s back then, a damp towel in his hand to clean around your sensitive thighs. “And you also scared the living shit out of me when you went limp after you came the second time.”

You roll your eyes, “Not my fault you fucked me dumb.”

He snorts, tossing the damp towel onto the ground as he lays back down beside you, pulling you close to his chest in what could be viewed to some as intimate, but to you two was normal behavior.

“Ew you’re gross and sweaty!” 

He hums, “So are you.”

You groan, “Release me you freak.”

“Aftercare is highly recommended after any heavy sex session, just lie with me for a bit, okay?”

“I’d argue it could’ve been heavier,” You mumble, succumbing to his hold around you.

“Next time,” His voice is light, leaving you with a strange sense of peace. You couldn’t help but stare now. With his eyes shut you could observe him closer than ever before. The soft lips of his that had been on you multiple different times tonight, red and bruised from the makeout session you had earlier. 

You squeeze an arm out of his hold, raising your fingers to trace over the small bite on his bottom lip. “I’m sorry I bit you.”

“Don’t be,” He sounded dazed, like he was seconds away from falling asleep. “If I had a problem then I would’ve stopped you.”

“Oh so you are a freak!” He hums, not denying it. “Oh my god you are, aren't you! No wonder those girls had zero plans on letting you go.”

He opens his eyes then, meeting you with a bored look. “I wouldn’t be talking if I were you, aren’t you the one who was seconds from coming just from me pinning you down?”

“What?” Your jaw drops. “That’s so untrue! This is defamation!”

He shuts his eyes again, seemingly ignoring your remarks yet keeping a smile on his face the entire time. 

“I could sue you! I’d take that drumset from you in a second.”

“Then would you take my job too?” He replies mockingly.

“Hey I could! The guys really happen to like me, you know I think if I talked it out with them we could work something out.”

He hums, “Then I guess i’d have to learn how to make some drinks and fill in for you?”

“I think bartender Jeno would suit you well.”

“Jeno? But what happened to Neno?” You regret even speaking to him instead of just playing dead after sex the second he brings up the nickname. 

You choose instead to turn your cheek to him with a pout. “You really love yourself some pillow talk.”

“I’m not the one who started it.”

“I wasn't pillow talking with you I was threatening you.” You retort. “You’re always so full of yourself you know not everyone is trying to bed you, right?”

He laughs, “Did I not just bed you?”

“Ah but that doesn’t count!” 

You’re both laughing then, every single ounce of regret fading away. You were silly to ever think that things could change between you two, and this was proof enough that sex didn’t necessarily mean everything would be different between the two of you. 

If you could flick off every movie and novel for overdoing the trope you would right now. Because as you laid next to Jeno you realized one thing, it would take more than just one hookup to erase the history you had both built together.

Part Two: 

Dare

☆ 🎸☆

Jeno was in no way secretive, but he also wasn’t the type to tell just everyone every single activity he found himself doing daily. He was quite the opposite to Donghyuck in that way. Where the lead singer acted as if he would die if he wasn’t in the loop twenty four seven, Jeno kept most things lowkey. 

But there was one issue with that.

“Late for the third practice in a row,” Donghyuck popped out of seemingly nowhere, trailing behind Jeno as he made his way over to the couch to set down his bag.

“Don’t know what you mean, Jisung isn’t here yet either.”

“Thats because the dude is probably getting his dick wet right now,” Jeno scowls at the idea, “You, have been getting zero action.”

“You don’t know what I do in my free time.”

“I know you’ve racked ten hours a day on valorant all last month,” Donghyuck hums, tilting his head like he had discovered groundbreaking information.

Jeno sighs. “You’ve been in my room.”

“I told you, your controller runs smoother than mine.”

“So then grab it and leave, why are you snooping?” Mark tunes in from where he’s standing, ironically enough, tuning his own guitar. 

“Because JenJen has been out way more than he usually is, and I know he’s not at any bars or clubs because I've been at all of them.”

“Ever considered he was avoiding you?” Jaemin smirks.

“Well no, that's unlike him.”

“I’m still here, y'know." Jeno shakes his head, nodding over at Mark in a quick apology. “Sorry, time went by quicker than I’d thought.”

It was the truth after all. He had made it very clear to you that he ran a tight schedule today, one that miraculously worked out in your favor considering how easy it was for Jeno to give into your whiny pleas. Especially when they were all he could hear with your hands in his hair roughly tugging as he ate you out slowly. It didn’t take long for you to finish on his tongue, it did however end with a quickie that lasted a bit longer than it should’ve.

“Don’t worry about it. Five minutes means nothing when you compare it to,” Mark checks his watch, the sound of the door twisting open. The creaky door revealed Jisung, who looked too sweaty for someone who drove himself here. “Ten.”

“I’m sorry I’m late I was—“

“Nobody wants to hear about your sex life.”

“I do.”

Jaemin winks at Jisung, the other frowning. Jeno would’ve laughed if it weren’t for the fact that if he made a single wrong move all attention would be directed to him. He moves away from the group slowly, hoping they’re too busy drilling the youngest to notice him slipping by. 

Unfortunately, that's not the case. “You alright man? I feel like the only times I ever see you is when we’re practicing.”

Jeno stops in his tracks, Mark standing before him with a slightly worried look on his face. Mark was a worrier. He didn’t like to make it very known, usually he played it off as just curiosity. But Mark always had the habit of playing with his fingers when he was concerned. 

“I’m great, actually just been spending more time with friends.” Jeno hopes the excuse is enough to let him escape, though if Jaemin was the one he said that to he would’ve been caught instantly.

“Oh,” Mark seems relieved, “Y/N? You should bring her over some time, or better yet bring her over to our set next weekend.”

“Yeah man I’ll let her know but I’m pretty sure she’s going to be busy.”

He knew you’d be busy, you mentioned that the night before, about how busy your work schedule was going to be and so there wouldn’t be much time in between to hang out. You had apologized profusely, to which he’d told you there was seriously no reason to. If he could last months without sex, he could last one week while he was out of town.

“Y/N! We haven't seen her in a while!” Jaemin joins the conversation, “How has she been?”

Mark is quick to give a short answer to him, one that Jeno is thankful for as he steps towards his place, drumsticks in hand. The other guys were still talking to each other, the conversation shifting to how Mark doesn’t appreciate them being late constantly. Jisung arguing about how he’s in more trouble when Donghyuck has shown up late to practice more times than Jisung. 

The guys were certainly not used to the rise of fame they’ve had, adjusting to a busier schedule and way more practice sessions than ever before. Jeno hadn’t even had time to check in with his family so much anymore because of how busy he was.

The reminder plagues his mind, making him reach for his phone to swipe through the family group chat that he hadn’t been catching up with for reasons that would only make him guilty. There wasn’t much to catch up on except for his cousin asking him for tickets to Oblivion’s show this weekend and another asking if he’s bringing Jaemin as his plus one to his sister’s wedding. That one he skipped past because Yeri had really been trying to make moves on Jaemin 

Shit. He had forgotten about how soon that was. He slid out of the chat, noticing a more recent text from his mother.

Mom: I hope you aren’t forgetting about the wedding. I ordered your suit for you and we still need to get it tailored. Stop by soon, I’ve seen my own son on my phone more than in person.

He shoots back a simple reply. He would make sure to visit her soon. More than likely after the show, since his hometown was only half an hour away. 

He hadn’t been home in a while, something he was regretting now that he realized it. He did love visiting his family, the problem was that as much as they supported him they, his mother mostly, couldn’t help but make subtle comments.

Like why wouldn’t he want his own place? She was willing to pay his rent so he didn’t have to share space with all of his roommates. Jeno declined on multiple occasions. As much as the guys were annoying, he didn’t mind their company.

Jeno grew up in a household different to the rest. His parents spent most of their time abroad, his father managing the family business and his mother spending most of her time performing in front of stadiums as a nation-known cellist. He did have his older sister, Seulgi, though she was busy with business school to eventually take on their family business.

He loved his family of course, and they loved him but being with the guys felt like he finally had brothers, annoying and kind of invasive, but brothers nonetheless.

“Okay enough screwing around, seriously.” Mark calls for the rest of them. The guys make their way to their positions, Jeno was about to set his phone down when he spots your message.

Princess: You busy tonight?

You had set your own nickname on his phone when you found out he had you as FN/LN, it stuck around since then. He smirks, typing in his reply. 

Neno: Why? 

You miss me already?

The chat bubble shows that you’re typing. He smiles to himself, awaiting your reply.

Princess: And other things…

I'm free at ten, you have a key.

He’s about to reply when Jaemin pops up from behind him, startling him into shutting his phone off. “Who are you texting?”

“Family.”

Jaemin scoffs, clearly not buying the excuse but choosing to ignore it. “Alright Vin Diesel.” He takes a few steps away, not before raising a brow like he was onto Jeno.

With what little time left before they start warming up Jeno sends a quick thumbs up, hoping that gets the message across clear enough. He can’t say he regrets any of the decisions made in the past few weeks, and if he could make an educated guess based off of how often you ran towards your laptop to write things down after sex, he was sure you felt the same.

He wouldn’t admit it to the guys, mostly because whatever he was up to wasn’t really their business, but also because he liked the sneaky vibe the two of you had going on. It wouldn’t last forever, that’s for sure. But could you blame him for not wanting his friends to ask question after question about you? 

If anything he was doing you two a favor, the guys would probably jump you with questions about Jeno that they would never be able to squeeze out of him. There was also the fear that if any of the guys started to catch on then he’d have to explain himself. They had already had a habit of teasing him whenever he mentioned spending nights at your place, even before this arrangement began.

Especially Jaemin who was always the hopeless romantic, reading into things too much. He always bugged Jeno with questions about you, ones like how nice you complimented each other, and how cute the babies would be if you wanted any. It was a problem that Jeno easily solved by setting boundaries, sure, yet still left him wary of telling his friend.

Jeno decided that it would be best to keep this from them, at least for as long as he could. It wasn’t so bad though, because on one hand while you got to tell your own friends, he kept it to himself. A secret that he cherished on his own, one that he could smile freely without anyone poking into what deeper meaning could be there.

☆ 📚 ☆

The last thing you expected was for you to be drunk out of your mind on a random Wednesday at six in the afternoon. It came as no shock that the reason came down to one single factor. Yuqi. The girl was known for her spontaneous trips all around the globe, so when she texted you to meet with her since she happened to be in town, you couldn’t decline.

So you had reluctantly canceled the plans from earlier with Jeno, one too many sorry texts and gifs until he finally called you to say it was really okay. Practice had gone on a bit longer than it usually was with their show coming up soon. And before you could offer another apology for not being able to go out and travel with him to see the band, he was already stressing that you need to worry less.

So that’s what you were doing now, relaxing with three empty soju bottles on the table to account for that. Yuqi sitting in front of you, picking at the samgyeopsal that you had eaten way too much of since she’d offered to pay. You couldn’t help the smile on your face, call it a buzzed daze or whatever but you felt good.

“Shuhua tells me you’ve been focused on writing,” Yuqi starts, “Says you’re trying to push yourself to release by the end of the year.”

You hum, batting your lashes to snap out of whatever daydreaming you’d been doing. “I’ve been pouring all of my hard work into it.”

Yuqi giggles, “Yeah, she said you’re not bad at all, just lack sex appeal.”

You gasp, “I’ll have you know that’s not true!”

She laughs louder, instigating just as she always did. “I’m kidding! She did say you were a bit stuck with the smut scenes.”

“Wow and I thought there was a non disclosure for book transcripts.” You joke, shoving a piece of the pork into your mouth. The sweet glaze being the first thing you taste as you bite into the meat, savoring the flavor like it was gourmet. You guessed that came with the buzz.

“Hey she said that I should talk to you about it, that I might offer good advice.”

“Cause you’re a sex fiend?”

She clicks her tongue, “Because I am an editor for one of the most recognized Magazine Journalism organizations in the world!” A few customers who happen to be dining in raise their eyebrows, giving you a look of disdain and annoyance. Yuqi bows her head slightly in apology before coughing and adjusting her volume, “And because I am a sex fiend, yes.”

“No need.” You reply, picking another piece of meat from the stove on the table. Yuqi frowns. To be honest, if she would’ve come around earlier offering you her own hook up stories than you probably would’ve taken that and used it for inspiration, but now you had your own experiences to use. Not that you had told anyone about that as of yet, so of course Yuqi was looking at you like you just turned down a million dollar check.

What Yuqi was offering was like a goldmine to early writers, ones who, like you, struggled with writer's block because of lack of inspiration. The only thing is, there wasn’t much left uninspired to you. Not when for the past few weeks since the first time you and Jeno had sex. If anything, you’d become quite the fiend yourself, texting him almost every day about perhaps trying something new. For research purposes of course.

“No need?” Yuqi spoke up, "Don't tell me you’ve replaced me with someone else. I didn’t even get to tell you about my trip to Thailand!”

She forgot that she did tell you about that trip, right as it was happening. She called you straight from the bedroom of some girl named Minnie that she’d met at a soirée where she downed way too many glasses of champagne to remember how she ended up in a different hotel room.

“Not replace you, just got some first hand experience.” You smile, refusing to meet her eyes as a warm smile makes its way on your face. She gasps loudly, having realized what the implications meant, the scattered people around shaking their heads at her volume.

“You found another fuck buddy?” She lowers her voice, leaning in closer to analyze any answer your body could tell her. Blame it on the alcohol and the dry mouth you get after a few too many shots, but you gulp. Her eyes widened once more. “Oh my god you did! Why wouldn’t you say anything?”

“Must I need to share everything?”

“Y/N,” She deadpans. “That’s like your main characteristic. Chronic oversharer?”

You open your mouth to reply but she cuts you off. “Don’t argue against it, it’s true! The first conversation we had was about how your childhood cat died and inspired you to become a Bartender.”

Rest in Peace Martini.

You shake your head, setting down your glass. “Alright, fine. Yeah I do, but it’s not like you think it is!” Yuqi tilts her head. “I mean that! You know i’m not really one to have a Fuck buddy.”

“Yet you do anyway?”

She was right, and your stubbornness hated that. “Only because it’s not just some rando!” This time, everyone’s eyes landed on you disapprovingly. You winced, quietly apologizing for your volume.

“Which is exactly why you kept it a secret in the first place, and why you refuse to tell me without sounding ominous, and also explains the fact that you look so tense right now because i’m putting all of the pieces together and— oh my god.” Yuqi pauses, “You’re fucking Lee Jeno.”

You almost spat out your drink, “How did you even guess that?”

“I had a hunch,” Her eyes trail down to your exposed shoulder, the sleeve of your shirt tugged lower than it was supposed to be. “Also I've only seen bites like that from one man.”

You weren’t sure if you should be concerned or jealous that she was familiar with his bite marks, not because the two of them had ever messed around but mostly because up until this moment you didn’t know she knew of his bedroom habits. You settled on fear. Yuqi’s guesses were never wrong. It was as scary as it was impressive. 

“Calm down tiger, I only know that because he used to hook up with my college roommate.”

For some strange reason that gives you a bit of relief. “I wasn’t going to say anything.” She stares at you for a bit, contemplating whether or not to argue with you, ultimately deciding not to.

“Fine, don’t say anything, just drink with me.”

You wouldn’t dare decline. Yuqi excuses herself, heading out to the bar to grab a few shots for a quick second. You’re left alone, scrolling through your phone and slowly thinking about Jeno. You think back to what Yuqi had mentioned earlier. Jeno’s fling with her roommate that you weren’t aware about. You can feel it again this time stronger, a pang in your chest that you refused to dwell over. Your attempts at ignoring fall flat because within the next second you slide into your recent chat with him, sending a text before your brain could decide otherwise.

Princess: What are you doing?

A few minutes pass with no reply until the notification comes in. It’s a picture of him in dim lighting, the only light coming in from what you assumed was his pc. He had headphones on, the mic barely covering his mouth. From the angle, you could see a bit of his clothing. A black tank top, that he apparently had multiple different versions of, his muscular arms on display. You bite your lip, saliva gathering in your mouth from how badly you needed that right now. The next message is short and simple.

Neno: On league w hyuck.

You feigned chalance, staring at the picture longer than you should’ve. Your eyes roam around the place, searching for your friend’s whereabouts before you could make a stupid decision. She’s nowhere, which meant one thing. Your finger is over the call button about to click when you hear someone come up, assuming it’s Yuqi you set your phone down. 

“Hey, are you lonely?”

A stranger you hadn’t noticed until now stood in front of you, the man clearly intoxicated with the way his speech was slurred. 

“Ah,” You look around for Yuqi, she’s nowhere in sight. “No not real—“

He doesn’t give any time for you to answer, sliding an empty chair way too close to you. From how close he is you can smell the alcohol off of him, even worse with the way he opens his mouth. “It’s not safe for your friend to just leave a pretty girl like you here.”

Your heartbeat rises, his words coming off way more threatening than friendly. You awkwardly laugh, hoping that you don’t at all look as scared as you feel right now. 

“Seriously, you’re fucking beautiful.” His arm reaches forward, holding onto your arm. “You got a boyfriend?”

“I–“ You stutter. Fuck. This was not at all how you were supposed to sound like. You’d experienced enough cat calls to know that the best choice in this situation is to walk away. For some reason though you couldn’t help but freeze up.

“Then how about you come with me tonight? I could show you a fun time.”

“How about you fuck off instead.” Yuqi appears out of nowhere, a deep frown on her face, the drinks in her hand coming down to slam against the table.

The man scoffs, looking more annoyed than frightened. “I don’t think someone like you should be talking like that.”

“And I don’t think someone in their thirties should have a receding hairline, but clearly I was wrong.”

He sneers, standing up from where he’s seated shortening the distance in between them. “Are you crazy?”

“Are you?” She starts, walking closer to him. In most scenarios you’d find your friend’s confrontational attitude inspiring, but right now all you could think about is just how drunk this man is, and just how many things could go wrong.

“Watch your fucking tone,” He stares down at Yuqi. “Bitch.”

You stand up then, trying to deescalate the situation without any hospital trips tonight. Yuqi opens her mouth about to start arguing back, the other people around doing nothing but sitting down in their seats. “Hey, there’s no need for any of this. I have a boyfriend, so if you don’t mind leaving—”

“What and I’m supposed to believe you?” He turns his attention to you. A group of men get up from their seats, quickly grabbing onto the man who you assume is their friend. They refuse to meet your eyes, instead trying to calm the guy down and take him back to where they were seated. 

“No fuck no I’m not leaving!” The man shoves his friend off of him. “These two bitches think they’re better than me or something.”

You hope he’s too drunk to notice the way you roll your eyes without thinking. As a bartender you’d seen many aggressive drunks, you knew better not to react spontaneously since they’d only take it as a challenge. You tried to keep your composure, instead turning your attention to Yuqi who had at some point during the dispute, grabbed onto her phone. 

You meet eyes with her, mouthing let’s go to her. She nods regretfully, holding back all of her anger on the tip of her tongue. You're about to step around him when he focuses on you. He grabs onto your wrist, “The fuck do you think you’re going?”

You pull your arm away, his grip not tight enough to scare you off. Okay, now you were seriously getting pissed off. “Dont fucking touch me.”

He lets out a deep chuckle, “Why? You seemed like that's all you wanted earlier.” 

Call it liquid courage but you felt a sudden surge of anger. All you wanted was good food, fun with a friend, and maybe a booty call at the end of the night not whatever bullshit this guy was on. You were off the clock for fuck’s sake. 

You're not even sure when it happens, just the direct aftermath. The man’s on the floor, blood dripping from his nose as you hold onto your hand. Your knuckles red from the contact to his face, more than likely going to leave a bruise. Yuqi’s eyes are wide, and you can tell she’s trying with all of her power to hold back laughing. 

The sorry guy is still on the floor, holding his nose and freaking out about the blood as his friends try to stop the bleeding and calm him down. You take that as a sign to leave, smiling and nodding at the crowd who are staring jaws slacked. Yuqi throws a quick few bills on the table before grabbing onto your non injured hand and dragging you outside of the restaurant. 

There she finally lets her expression change, her laughs filling the silent outside air. “Oh my fuck—“ She tries to catch her breath. “What the fuck when did you learn to punch like that?”

“I’m a girl who works as a bartender, it’s a safety measure.” You shrug, prompting her to laugh more. You fall into a fit of your own, her contagious cackling promoting you to join. The roads are hardly busy at all, a comforting fact to you when the two of you probably looked insane right now. 

She finally steadies her breaths, at the same time a car approaches the side of the road. One that you recognized as Jeno’s. He parks it, stepping outside of the vehicle and directly to the two of you. You suck in a breath, his hands coming to your face as he looks into your eyes with worry.

“What happened? Are you okay?” You open your mouth to respond when he cuts you off. His hand grabbing onto your tender one, the colors barely visible from where the bruises were forming. “Youre hurt.”

“You should’ve seen the other guy!” Yuqi jokes. 

Jeno’s eyes darkened. “Where the fuck is he.”

“Neno it’s fine he was just some drunk,” You smile tightly, hoping it’s enough to keep him from doing anything stupid. It’s not.

“It’s not fine. I could hear him through the phone and drunk or not he shouldn’t be talking to anyone like that.”

You couldn’t lie, the way Jeno was acting right now was kind of sexy but this was not what you wanted right now. The situation had been dealt with. You were pretty sure with a punch of that strength you’d at least broken his nose.

“Jeno,” You slide your fingers into his hand, the act more intimate than you realized. He seems caught off guard, closing his own fingers around yours lightly so as to not hurt you more. “I promise, I’m okay.” He sighs, his jaw clenched with everything he’s holding back right now. 

“Well,” Yuqi starts. “There’s an obvious connection going on right now.”

You both turn to face the brunette, her smile teasing with a flicker of amusement in her eye. You guessed this was probably the most fun she's had in a while. You expect him to pull away, closing your eyes to brace yourself from the embarrassment. The moment never happens, his hand refusing to let go of you even as he turns to face your friend.

Jeno huffs out a short chuckle, “Hi Yuqi.”

“Hey Jeno! It’s been quite the while.” She looks behind the two of you to a car that pulls onto the side of the road behind Jeno’s. “I wish we could chat longer but unfortunately I do have a flight to catch so..”

“You said you’re staying for a week?”

“Ah,” Yuqi gulps, caught in the lie. “Right well I should start packing early. It was nice seeing you two though, goodbye!”

She's gone the next second, sneaking around the two of you to get into the car. You smile amused by her antics. Jeno doesn’t let go, instead leading you with him towards the car. You follow behind, nothing but the sound of the engine from Yuqi’s mysterious ride fading into the night. He opens the door for you, letting you in and shutting it as he makes his way over to the drivers side.

The ride is full of silence, the traffic lights illuminating Jeno’s face to help you decipher his current mood. He’s unreadable to most, especially when he’s upset. But not to you. Never to you. You knew him like the back of your hand. 

You try and come up with something to say when your phone lights up. 

Yuqi: Oh he’s down baddddd. He called me to go check on you didnt even say hi just said go check on y/n then said he was on his way and hung up. 

I thought it might be best if you wanted to see him so I got a ride lol :P 

Text me when you get home tho!

Unless you’re too busy getting busy iykwim ;))))

You shoot out a quick reply, closing the app to open your recent calls. Jeno was at the top of the recents page. You must’ve called him accidentally when that man snuck up to you, no wonder he mentioned hearing the conversation.

That made things much more awkward for you. For one, you had been the one to cancel plans on him. Then after a few drinks you called him, ruining his game because you couldn’t simply get the stranger to fuck off. That must’ve been why he was silent. He was mad at you. The furrow in his brows gave away that much.

“I’m sorry,” you start, “for ruining your night.”

He keeps his eyes on the road, his eyes only barely meeting yours as he continues to drive. “Is that what you think?”

“Isn’t it? I didn’t even mean to call you. I was going to handle it myself.”

He takes a deep breath, “Stop, that's not it.”

“Then what is it? Are you mad you didn’t get to hit him first? Is this like a weird Alpha Male dominance thing?” He chuckles and for some reason that makes you more frustrated. “I’m serious, Jeno. Why are you mad?”

“I’m not mad,” he pauses,  “Well not in the way you think.”

You lour, “What kind of response is that? Is this some kind of puzzle to solve? Oh great mysterious Jeno, please allow me to discover the truths of why you're angry!”

“I’m not mad,” He stops at a red light, head turning to look at you directly, your own eyes meeting him with slight annoyance. “I-“ He starts again, turning back to the road. “I’m upset. I wish I was there with you and that you wouldn’t have to deal with those poor excuses for men. And it's not that I don’t think you can handle things on your own, it's just that I wish you wouldn’t have to. Call it my ego but I want to be there to prevent shit like that.”

You blush, remorseful for your tone seconds prior. You were jumping to conclusions quite a bit. No, a lot a bit. Jeno wasn’t the type to want to admit how he felt, so you knew it did take him more courage than the average person to open up.

If his pride was hurt doing so then you thought the best option would be to hurt your own back. “If it helps, I was upset at you earlier too.” You can see his brow raise slightly. “I texted you mostly cause Yuqi mentioned you used to hook up with her roommate. If it’s like an ego thing, I guess technically I’m the same.”

“Miyeon?”

You wince at the name. “Sure.”

You weren’t aware of when the two of you made it to your apartment, just that suddenly you were in the familiar dark garage, cars parked all around the grey space. He turned the key, his car turning off as the two of you stayed quiet.

“Miyeon was just a fling, I didn’t tell you because it was over as quickly as it began.”

You refuse to move a muscle. You couldn’t explain why the thought still bugged you but it did. “Okay.” You say, and you're reaching for your seat belt when his hand stops you.

“I’m serious, there’s nothing you need to worry about.”

You knew that was true. The two had probably gone about their life without acknowledging each other. Jeno probably even lost track of her within the list of girls he’d already been with. For some reason the thought bugs you.

You shake it off, “I know, Neno. It’s okay, it was just a lapse in judgment.”

He nods, refusing to look away from you. You're not sure when he removed his own seat belt but he did, because suddenly his hands moved to remove your own. Your heart was pounding, his breath featherlight against you, raising the hairs on your arms.

He pulls away slightly, looking into your eyes for any words you left unspoken, all of which he’d taken right from your mouth. Speaking of, you couldn’t help but look at his lips, the overwhelming urge to pull him closer taking over your entire being. He must get the memo, because with his next move he’s cupping your face and kissing you.

The kiss is not at all like the ones you’d had before. Where those before were pure adrenaline, his lips met yours with an apology. Slow and gentle. His tongue grazed your bottom lip like he couldn’t get enough of you. And when you were about to deepen the kiss, he pulled away.

“Goodnight, Princess.”

You felt like you’d been slapped in the face. Was he insane? You snapped out of whatever daze you’d been in, facing him. He was already turning the car back on.

Wow so he really is insane.

You scoff, about to get up and out of this car and block him on every app to ever exist when you stop yourself. You bring your legs up onto the seat, hooking your hand under his seat to slide it further away from the wheel. 

“What are you doing?”

You ignore him, and once there’s enough space between you move over, hopping onto his lap. His hands hold your waist on instinct. “It’s bad manners to leave a girl hanging after kissing her like that.”

He smiles mockingly, “Like what?”

You bring your hand up, mimicking the way he held onto you. “Like it hurt you to pull away.”

“Maybe it did,” He whispers, one more word and his lips would be touching yours. You aren’t sure who made the move, just that all of a sudden you were both on each other once again, this time with a sense of urgency.

His hand slid into your shirt, fingers trailing up your spine to push you closer to him. The action only fueled your hunger more, you kissed him harder. It was possessive, like you wanted to leave a mark on him, one that told him that for now he was yours. You rolled your hips once, the two of you sucking in a breath in sync at the feeling.

He pulled away, his chest heaving. “We shouldn’t be doing this here.” You knew him well enough now to know he was trying desperately to come up with an excuse. Why he was, you weren’t sure.

“Why not?” You ask, taking a moment to give him time to think. He didn’t answer. Feigning innocence you grinded your hips down once again. His jaw clenched, a tell sign that he was holding back, redness creeping up his face. “Nobody’s around.”

“I don’t have condoms in here.”

You shrug, condoms were the last of your worries right now. “I don’t mind it as long as you don’t.”

His gaze darkens, a smile creeping onto his face. “Is that what you want?”

More like what you needed. If he didn’t dick you down right at this moment you would probably just end up getting yourself off then going to bed frustrated. There really was no comparing your own smaller fingers to his thick ones, and even your pussy was starting to tell the difference.

You nod and that’s enough for him to curse a fuck it and bring his mouth to yours. This time it was all teeth and tongue. Nothing but pure fervency to consume every part of each other. You let out a gasp as he slips his fingers under your skirt, dragging them against the damp fabric.

“You’re so wet baby,” He pulls away, whispering against your sensitive neck. “Is this all for me?” You nod, wishing for nothing more but him to fill you up already. He clicks his tongue, “Come on Princess we’ve talked about this before, use your words.”

“Yes, since you sent that picture of you.” You ramble. You think it would probably be best if you were shot dead at the moment. What was that one animal that gets so embarrassed that it just dies on the spot called?

He chuckles, finding your confession flattering. “Then I shouldn’t tease you any longer.” He says before sliding your panties to the side and shoving two long fingers in you at once. The squeeze is tight, but in all of the right ways. You whine, grinding down on them to feel them hit deeper.

“Fuck,” He says, fixated on the way you squeeze around his digits. “Use my fingers to get yourself off.” You waste no time listening, riding them slowly as he watches. You’re biting onto your lip, holding back sounds as much as possible because technically you both were still in a public area, as silent as it was.

He kisses you, swallowing every single one of your sounds. Your brain feels like it’s working overtime, hyperaware of every action. You feel him slide another finger in, curling them against you barely grazing your g-spot. You bite down against his lip, offering a poor apology as he hisses, your orgasm approaching rapidly.

Jeno doesn’t reply, instead he uses his mouth to trail against your neck making sure to leave bruises around the sensitive skin. You’ve given up on holding back any sounds, your moans building up just as your climax is, and right as you’re about to finish Jeno bites down on your skin. You cry out loud, the pain and pleasure meshing into one, a tear sliding down your cheek.

He pulls his fingers out, a whine falling from your mouth from the loss. “Color?” He asks, his pupils dilated as you look at him.

“Green.”

“Good, I knew you could take it.” He slides the waistband of his sweatpants down, pumping his cock twice.

“You didn't wear anything under?”

He shakes his head, “Had to hold myself back from fucking you the second you started grinding against me.”

You laugh, “You should’ve just done it.”

“Stay quiet and I will.” 

“Okay,” You take the challenge, sliding your panties down your thighs and hovering over his dick. You don't give him any time, sinking down on him in one full go. You bite down on your lip to keep yourself from groaning. He’s breathing heavily holding back his own sounds. “That goes for you too.”

His arms come up to guide you, helping lift until it’s only the tip before sinking down again. Nothing but heavy gasps of air and low curses slipping from you both. There was nothing like a fun challenge, trying your hardest to hold back your moans while simultaneously trying to get the other to slip up.

As he continues to pound into you, you try your hardest to keep your eyes open, the slight sting of the mascara in your eyes from your earlier tears. You made a note to buy yourself a sex proof one soon. Jeno’s trying his hardest to stay composed, but you can tell how good he feels with the way his fingers dig into your skin.

“Fuck.” He gives in, lifting you fully on his own and setting a harsher pace. You can feel him hit directly against you. You gasp, using your hand to cover your mouth and try to keep silent. It’s no use, from the angle you feel him even deeper, moans coming out of you as the pressure in your stomach signals your release.

“Neno– mmh. fuck—“

You shout, louder than you meant to, your legs aching with how much they were being put to use. You swear you notice a twinge of mischief in his eyes. The next second he’s bringing the same hand that was just inside you to your mouth. “Open.”

You do, still managing to taste yourself as he swirls his fingers around your tongue. He pulls them away, a string of saliva breaking away as he uses his thumb to tilt your head down. He traces your bottom lip, slightly bringing you closer. Then when you think he’s going to kiss you senseless again, he spits into your mouth.

“I told you princess, keep it down.” He whispers, thrusting into you with no remorse. You can feel yourself about to come undone.

“Neno I’m gonna—“

“I know baby, me too.” You can hear it in his rough voice. “Cum with me.”

With one last thrust you’re orgasm hits you, fast and heavy. He curses, filling you up with his seed. You whine, it’s the first you’d ever let a man finish inside you and damn had you been missing out. Any attempt of speaking is cut short, you’re brain is too fucked out to process anything. Instead you fall forward, curling into his neck that’s damp with sweat that is a little gross but mostly comforting.

“You smell familiar.”

He laughs, his hand scratching your scalp, you hum. “It’s your shampoo.”

“I fucking knew it.” You pout, not daring to move from his hold. The two of you stay that way. Curled up against one another in complete silence. You’re fighting your sleep, you had been the second he started scratching you. His low breathing isn’t helping either.

“We can’t stay like this forever,” His whispers, yet makes no choice to move. And even though you knew what he meant, your mind couldn’t help but picture different scenarios.

Was that what he would tell his other hookups? 

Did he warn them before they became too attached?

You shove the idea down, refusing to think it over. He was oblivious to your sudden concerns with your face hidden away from him. You suck in a breath, the light lavender scent of your shampoo hitting your nose with an underlying musk from Jeno himself. You should say something. It wasn’t abnormal to be curious about his past arrangements. You open your mouth, closing it just as quickly. 

“I know.” You say instead and you swear you can hear his heart pound a bit faster when you do, but just as you shoved down your own thoughts earlier, you do the same now.

 ☆ 🎸☆

For a long time there was nothing Jeno loved more than performing on stage.

He was destined to make music. He knew it from a young age. Cemented by his aunt who had gifted him a drum set as a kid. His mom had only further encouraged him, he was the one to take on her love for music, even if it was through a different instrument or way of expressing.

During every stage his heart was pounding with adrenaline, never becoming exhausted and instead waiting for his next cue. It fueled him, every slam of his drumsticks, the vibration felt throughout his entire body, and of course as he grew older he only became more confident in his abilities. He felt it every time he was on stage, a smile growing on his face as each song came.

The growing fan base wasn’t something he ever prioritized. He didn’t make music to become famous and make money, hell he was the son of some of the most known and respected people in their fields. You would make jokes about his nepotism, and maybe if the guys had any clue who he was before he joined then that would’ve been the case, but none of it mattered anyway.

Now suddenly, he wanted to show them the best of him. That meant being himself at his core, and what better way was there to show that side of him than drumming?

Oblivion were finishing up their last song, the sound of the fans screaming crescendoed as Donghyuck’s low nasally voice rang out the final verse. Jeno’s heart was going one hundred miles a minute, pure ecstasy flowing through his body. Then within a half second, he blinked and suddenly his smile had nothing to do with the crowd and the energy they had been radiating all night that directly translated into his performance. No, this time he pictured you, in all of your glory. 

The song came to an end. The crowd made sure to be the loudest they were the whole night, one particular high pitched squeal pulling him from his own thoughts. He rolled his eyes at Jaemin who was winking at a fan that resulted in another scream. He dragged him off of the stage, following the rest of the group as they walked back to their shared waiting room.

“Great show out there,” Darling cheered, specifically running into Jisung’s arms to give him a quick peck. The action made Jeno slightly envious in a way he’d never felt before by the couple’s frequent pda. “I swear there were way more people in attendance than any other show!”

“Thanks Darling,” Jaemin smiles. “You might just be our good luck charm.”

Jisung visibly deflates at the usage of his nickname for his girlfriend, pulling at her waist to keep her close like Jaemin would snatch her at any second. Jaemin was only messing around, he’d confessed to Jeno a few months ago that he loved how Jisung’s face scrunched up when he was annoyed, so he made it a mission to piss him off as much as possible.

“Yeah Jisung is more focused than ever,” Donghyuck smirks, “unless we count the time he was busy getting his dick sucked before we had to go up on stage.”

“That’s not what happened!” The couple shout in unison, matching shades of red in their face. Jeno was sure the group would never let them live that down.

Mark laughs. “Well we should be staying here for one night only, remember not to end up so drunk that you sleep through hotel maintenance pounding on your door so hard they assume you died.” 

“It happened one time.” Donghyuck groans.

“And it won’t happen again, you and Jaemin are sharing a room tonight.”

“What? Hello, way to be a cockblock, Mark. I was planning on going out tonight.” The implication that he was bringing someone back to the hotel was clear.

“Not my problem,” Mark sighs out before turning to Jeno. “You’re staying a few days longer, right?”

“Yeah, I'm gonna spend the weekend with my parents.”

“Nice, have fun.”

“Then what about you, Mark? You just got a room to yourself?” Donghyuck pouts.

“Yep,” Mark answers honestly, "gives me time away from you guys.” 

Darling laughs, "Don't worry, the nahyuck fans will love it.”

“What the fuck is that?”

“Aww,” Jaemin coos, his arm wrapping around Donghyuck’s shoulder, “We have our own ship name!”

Donghyuck looks like the revelation is causing him physical distress. Jeno takes that as a cue to leave before the two start fighting because once they started it was hard to stop them.

“Youre not going out with us at least?” Jisung asks, his fingers intertwined with his girlfriend's, a soft smile on his face that Jeno never saw from him until the two of them reconnected. He was happy for his friend, he always did wish the best for them all, and for people like Jisung and even Jaemin, he knew as much as they contradicted it with their past or current actions. They wanted love most of all. So seeing Jisung as he was now, so open and honest with his feelings was relieving for the most part. Though on one hand it did open a can of worms he was actively avoiding paying any mind to.

He could tell the guys were growing a bit curious. He wasn’t spending much time at the apartment, opting to spend the night at yours instead. A privilege you weren’t aware of that none of his past hookups ever got. Once again, a can of worms he really didn’t want to open. 

“Nah not tonight.”

Jisung raises an eyebrow, but doesn’t ask anything. With that, Jeno’s saying a quick goodbye, making his way out of the door as Donghyuck and Jaemin start one of their petty arguments.

Jeno had to give his parents credit, as much as his parents were busy, they always made sure to provide their children with only the best of the best. That included hiring Miss Kim, their personal chef, to make the best meals for their children.

He sat at the kitchen table, plates of breakfast being served as his Mom read the morning newspaper, his father sitting next to her and feeding her some of the washed grapes that Miss Kim had brought earlier. Jeno felt a twinge in his chest at the sight, covering it up with a quick cough as if anyone around would notice it.

“Is Seulgi here yet?”

His mom sets the paper down, “She’s late, overslept after a late engagement party her friend, what's her name?”

“Joy.” His father answers, feeding her another grape.

“Right. I think She's set to be one of her bridesmaids.”

Jeno nods. Miss Kim is setting his plate down in front of him, he mouths a thank you receiving a quick smile and bow before Miss Kim heads back to the kitchen.

“Speaking of which,” Mrs Lee sits up, eyeing Jeno with a mischievous expression as he digs his spoon into the side bowl of rice. “You aren’t coming alone, right?”

Jeno smiles smug, “Are you implying I bring back Jaemin?”

Jeno had invited Jaemin to a family gathering of his about two years ago. His mother was not immune to his charms, taking a liking to his carefree and confident way of speaking. She was adamant on setting him up with Seulgi until she had came out. And even though both parents were very supportive, Jeno had a feeling that his mother hadn’t yet given up on her dream of having Jaemin as a son in law. Though her target had shifted to Jeno.

“No actually, though im not opposed to inviting him. I’ve already told your cousin all about him.” That explained the consistent texts from her. “I just think it would be nice if you brought someone back home with you. Show her around a bit. How about that friend of yours you mentioned? Y/N is it?”

He almost spat out his food, choking it down instead to which his father passed him his handkerchief. He grabbed onto it, coughing until they finally died down.

“I’m not too sure ive mentioned her before,” He finally answers.

“Oh if not you then, perhaps Seulgi?”

Jeno has to hold back from groaning. There was a time where he and his sister went out for drinks, she had introduced herself to you and the night ended with you and her exchanging numbers. Clearly he wasnt aware that you both had stayed in contact since then, he’d definitely be asking you about that soon. “Yes, perhaps.”

“She told us about her, mentioned shes a very sweet girl.” His mom’s smile widens. “I’d like to meet her.”

He hums, praying for any possible distraction to appear. The sounds of rushed footsteps approaching from none other than Seulgi herself. “Sorry I’m late!” She says, taking a seat next to Jeno. “What did I miss?”

“Nothing.” Jeno says at the same time his mother says, “Did you invite Jeno’s friend to your wedding?” 

Seulgi pauses for a moment, “Jaemin?”

“Y/N.”

“Ah,” Seulgi smiles a thank you at Miss Kim who brought her a serving, “I assumed he was going to bring her on his own.”

“Never just assume with a man,” Mrs Lee sighs. “Jeno, I hope you can consider it.”

It’s not that Jeno refused to consider inviting you. It’s just that, his mom could be kind of stubborn. If you were to come by and she grew to like you then she’d automatically assume that you and him were meant to be together. And Jeno had a feeling she would like you, there was nobody in the world who wouldn’t. 

The last thing Jeno wanted was to make you uncomfortable by introducing you to his family, meeting Seulgi was enough, and you end up running away scared. On the other hand, you were someone important to him, so what was the difference of introducing you to his family when he’s introduced Jaemin before.

“I’ll talk to her about it,” Jeno says finally. His mom, grinning happily, is about to reply when he continues. “But I'm not going to force her. If she doesn’t want to, then she doesn’t have to.”

“Well of course not,” Seulgi punches his shoulder lightly, “We’re not expecting you to kidnap her. Although considering the book drafts she’s shown me, I don’t think she’d mind it.” She jokes. Jeno’s eyes widen, and a part of him is scared that his parents might have heard, but when he turns to see them both in their own world he knows they didn’t.

Then again, there’s that familiar sting of envy. Only this time he can’t blame it on the overdone PDA from Jisung and Darling, now it’s from his own parents. His parents wore their hearts on their sleeve constantly, and never hid their love from anyone. He’d grown used to it years ago, so what changed now?

Something must be severely wrong with me.

☆ 📚 ☆

Things are the worst they could ever be. Okay that was dramatic but it was what you felt like in the moment. For starters you had a suspicious feeling you were growing sick, you sneezed way more than the average amount of times a person sneezes today. Then second of all, you were drawing blanks both literally and physically.

You had been sitting in front of your laptop for what felt like hours, and absolutely nothing would pop up. There was also another issue, one you didn’t want to speak aloud to anyone other than the incognito mode on your safari search. You felt pent up. Something that you didn’t even know could happen with two days of abstinence, but unfortunately it could. 

It was like you were going crazy, you’d lasted years without sex so why did two days suddenly feel like eternity. Your head missed Jeno a lot, but your body did so much more. Especially late at night, like right now that you were in the darkness of your room with only the bedside lamp to illuminate the space around you. You tried to get off, maybe that could help with your writer's block in some weird kinky way. It was no use.

Not even scrolling Twitter videos could save you. You tried to sleep it off, perhaps a break would help. But the longer you laid down in complete darkness the more insatiable you became.

And then there was the bright idea. Jeno was a night owl, perhaps he was awake right now? You blushed in the dark room, there was no way you were even considering sexting him while he was spending quality family time. No you couldn’t stoop so low.

You flopped onto your right side, squeezing your eyes shut to clear your mind. Only instead your mind began playing tricks on you, images of Jeno’s body flashing through your mind like they were stored in a hard drive from your brain. You visualized the curve of his muscles, the definition and ridges of his back muscles that you hooked your nails into when he drilled into you so—

Oh gosh. You were seriously thinking about Jeno like that right now. This couldn’t be right, right? Your body seemed to think differently, with the way you felt your panties begin to dampen from your arousal.

You took a deep breath, snatching your phone from the charging cable on your desk and opening your message tab with Jeno.

Princess: Are you awake?

His typing pops up faster than you’d expected. You were hoping that he wouldn’t reply, then you could call it a night and pretend this never happened.

Neno: Yeah. Can’t sleep?

Princess: Not really…

You’re about to chicken out, your finger hovers over the do not disturb button when your familiar ringtone, one of Oblivion's earliest songs, blasts out of your phone. You jump, sliding the answer button.

“Hello?” Your voice comes out way more weak than you intended, and mentally you’re beating yourself up about it.

“Hey,” His voice hits you like a truck. The deep timbre sliding down your spine in a way that makes your body react on its own, goosebumps raising on your skin. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing I–“ Just miss you. It’s funny how now the tables have turned. “Can’t sleep.”

He hums, and you can hear him shifting on the other side, perhaps trying to get comfortable. “Do you want to talk?”

You wanted more than talking but maybe that was being too greedy. “Yeah, tell me about how the show went.”

He pauses for a second, “Went great, fans seemed to enjoy it a lot. Spent the rest of the day with my family.”

“Oh,” You forgot that he mentioned a breakfast date with his family. Your family was far too busy for those kinds of gatherings so it was a bit surprising but sweet. “How was that?”

“Not bad, it was nice seeing them with how long it’s been.”

“Can you tell me more?”

He chuckles, “Like what?”

“Anything. What about that game you play, how's that going?”

There’s another pause, and for a moment you feel like you’ve been caught. “Princess.”

The nickname goes straight to your core, your thighs pushing together on instinct. “Yeah?” You reply, voice weaker than you meant it to come out.

“Why are you awake right now?”

“I- I told you. I couldn’t sleep.”

“Right,” He pauses again, and you missed the way his voice deepened. “How can I help you with that baby?”

You suck in a breath, a curse slipping from your lips. You swear you can hear him smile through the phone. “Come on, tell me what you need.” 

“I need you.”

You can hear him move around again, your chest tightening with how honest you were. You meant it in more ways than one, but there was no time to dwell on it now.

“Why don’t you let me hear how true that is?” 

“Like right now?” You squeak out, suddenly embarrassed.

He chuckles, “Or is that not why you called me?”

“I don’t know what you mean—“ “Princess. Never in a million years have you asked me about my games.”

“What if I wanted to change that?”

“You’re stalling.” He states, “If you’re shy you don’t have to be, your voice alone made me crazy the second you picked up.”

His honesty scares you a bit, but it also gives you room to relax. “Do I have that effect on you?”

“More than one.” You take a shallow breath, and he definitely notices it. “Are you gonna be a good girl and spread your legs for me?”

There’d be no way for him to know if you were really following his instructions, but with how needy you were you made sure to do it anyway. Sliding your fingers past your bellybutton and tracing the light fabric.

“Tell me, just how wet are you for me?”

“Fuck–“ You clench around nothing. “Since earlier. I couldn’t sleep without thinking of you.”

“Is that why you texted? Were you just waiting for me to call you to use my voice and get yourself off?”

“N-no I didn’t know you’d call.”

He hums mockingly, “Really? Then what were you going to do? Give up and wait for me to get back home to fuck you? His words were harsh. For some reason it was working for you, a wave of want rushing through your veins. “Or maybe, you were going to go out and find someone else to do the job?

“No Neno I wouldn’t,” You plead, “I only want you.”

“Fuck,” He whispers Beasley audible through how fast your heart was beating. “Then use my voice, and I’ll make sure to fuck you good tomorrow as an apology.”

You take that as a promise, your hand slipping down into your panties, fingers gliding across the folds of your wet cunt. You gasp, “Fuck Neno I’m so wet.”

“Yeah baby?” He grunts, and the familiar sound only drives you crazier. “Go ahead, slide a finger in.” 

You do as he commands, your pussy squeezing around the digit. Only there’s no relief, you were used to Jeno’s long thick fingers, yours were nothing in comparison. “It's not enough.” You cry, desperately wishing he was there.

“Shh,” he coos you. “It’s okay baby, come on just imagine it’s me.”

You slid another finger in, it wasn't long enough, but it would have to do for now. You rocked your hips, slowly fucking yourself with your fingers, your panties pushed to the side as the wet squelches filled the room.

“Fuck I can picture how tight you are,” he groans through the phone and youre barely registering now just how quiet he’s trying to make his own voice. “Youre taking my fingers so well huh?”

“Fuck Neno please.” You whine, scissoring yourself to fit another finger in.

For a moment all that can be heard is the heavy breathing through the phone. The two of you are trying to keep as quiet as possible. You register it then, the wet slide of him on the other side. You’re not sure how you missed it. He was jacking himself off as you got off to his voice.

“Neno.” You call out his name.

“Yes, princess?” He stutters through the line. 

“I’m ready for you now.” 

He laughs at being caught. “Yeah? You gonna be able to take it?”

You nod like he could see you, “just please fuck me already.”

“Alright then,” he plays along. “Spread your legs for me more baby.” 

Your eyes are shut, visualizing him over you, his hand gripping your leg harsh to keep them from shutting. You slide a third finger into your cunt, it wasn't close to his girth but it would have to do at the moment. You clenched around them, imagining your fingers were his cock instead, filling you up so good. “Neno–ngh fuck youre so big.”

“You can fit me baby, you know why?” His voice is low. “cause that pretty pussy of yours was made for me.” 

You moan, setting a strict pace to match his own through the phone. The light sounds of his breathing getting heavier with every thrust of his hand. You could imagine him now, he’d probably be biting his lips to hold back his noises, trying to keep quiet from his family who were only a few rooms over. Your stomach tightens, your release approaching quicker than it would when it was just you to get yourself off.

“I’m close.”

“Me too,” He replies. “You gonna let me cum inside you again? Fill up your needy cunt?”

“Fuck yes Neno—” You scream out, your orgasm washing over you in the next second. Your fingers are cramping up, continuously thrusting inside you to help milk out your orgasm. 

He grunts a bit louder, calling out your name from what you can assume is from him reaching his own climax. You keep your phone close to you, your breaths evening out. Your legs felt like jelly, the energy you’d had before dissipating. The tiredness from the time being four in the morning finally hitting you.

“Baby?” Jeno called out. You hummed low, using what was left of your energy to do so. He chuckles through the line, having realized that you were seconds away from knocking out. “I’ll see you tomorrow, princess.”

You don’t even remember if you answered or not, only that the call ended. Your breaths fall into an even rhythm as you drift off to sleep.

Part three:

Do I wanna know?

☆ 🎸☆

Call Jeno what he was. A simp, a manwhore, a little bitch. That one was specifically from an angry Donghyuck whom he had declined going out with for the fifth time in a row to see you today. He’d gotten back from his parents house, and assuming how early he woke up to drive back into town he wasn’t surprised you were still sleeping. You had a habit of a minimum of twelve hours a night and he’d taken up most of those last night at four in the morning.

He blushed slightly at the memory. You hadn’t answered, which would’ve worried anyone in his situation if he didn’t know you well enough to know that you were probably busy writing like your life depended on it after gaining a surge of inspiration.

He gripped onto the plastic bag in hand. He stopped by the convenience store for some of your favorite ramen. Nothing else, truthfully, the pack of condoms had somehow made their own way into his bag. “Y/N!” He opened your front door, being sure to lock it behind him.

The apartment was unusually silent, safe for the meows coming from Meowy who greeted Jeno by rubbing against his feet. He cooed at the cat before making his way over to your kitchen to set the bag on the counter. “I brought you some noodles! Oh and they had a discount on the condoms so I thought why not!”

You didn’t answer. He frowned, looking out at the front door he’d just come from to spot your shoes in their place. You were home, so were you just sleeping in?

He walked over to your bedroom, knocking a few times. A low groan sounding through the door followed by a “Come in.”

He opened the door, the darkness of the room enveloping you as you laid in bed, Your body curled in itself like you’d exhausted all energy for the rest of the year. He frowned, approaching you with soft footsteps. Your eyes met his with a squint.

“Princess?” He called your name, to which he immediately regretted the second your lips started wobbling.

“Neno I’m sorry,” your eyes began to water.

He panics, sitting on the corner of the bed to get closer to you. “Hey, what's wrong?” He feels a slight panic from seeing you like this, it’s not the first time he’d seen you cry but it wasn’t a sight he’d see often.

“I didn’t want to text anyone and I know I said I wanted you bit then I woke up and it was like a crime scene everywhere and I spent the whole morning washing the sheets but then my washer broke so I hand cleaned it all and these cramps are seriously going to kill me—“

“Hey it’s okay,” Jeno cuts you off, his thumb wiping the tear threatening to fall from your eyes. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

“Nothing,” You reply bashfully, “Ugh I’m so annoying I always get so sad on my period. It’s gross.”

“It’s not gross.” He replies in an instant.

“Youre right it’s just human nature or whatever,” you sigh, wiping at your own eyes and sitting up. He reaches forward, his warm hand wrapping around your waist to stop you. “Hey it’s okay, I can go. Just get some rest.”

You pouted, “But I don’t want you to go.”

He smiled, “Okay, I won’t.”

Jeno wasn't sure how much time had passed like this. Just that as soon as you could you had cuddled into him. Something about his natural body warmth being the perfect temperature to help your cramps, so he held onto you, your breaths eventually evening out into sleep.

He didn’t even bother to grab his phone, instead just staring at you like some creep. He was grateful no one else was there to call him out on it though. After a few minutes, you shifted. Your head peaked up from where it laid flat on his chest.

“Sorry did I trap you?” You mumbled the question, sleep still evident in your voice.

“No, it was pretty comfortable actually. You're like a sloth kind of.”

You rolled your eyes, laying your head down again. “You look like one.”

“Rude, and after I canceled plans with Donghyuck to come see you.” Jeno was only joking, he would’ve declined plans with Donghyuck even if he didn’t come to see you.

“Sorry again,” you whisper. “I didn’t mean to lead you on.”

He scoffs playfully, “Hey I’m your friend before anything else.” He’s not sure why it felt so icky to say it but he continues, “I don’t need sex just to want to see you.”

You blush at his words, hiding your face deeper into his chest. “Yeah well, you're the first guy I’ve ever met like that.”

Jeno wasn't sure of most of your dating history, he wasn't the type to just ask but now he couldn’t help but be a bit curious. “Have you dated men like that?”

“Not dated, I’m not one for a relationship.” He knew that. The two of you had related plenty, but now he was itching to know more about you.

“Is there a reason?”

“No, not particularly at least.” You stir, wrapping his arm around your shoulder as you lay on your back, looking up at the ceiling filled with the tiniest glow in the dark stars that had been there for years. “I mean for some time I did want that, but then I lost my virginity and I guess I realized that love isn’t something that happens in real life.”

There’s not a single ounce of pain in your voice. “I held it off for the longest time, save for love kind of thing. Then in college I ended up sleeping with a crush and really it didn't live up to any expectations. The guy hardly even acknowledged me at all except for my body.”

Jeno scowled, the stupidity of men would be their demise. He could understand why women wanted nothing to do with them, there were plenty of fish in the sea sure, but just how many were the parasitic kind that drained the life out of women.

“It was alright I guess, led me to now. And congrats, you're the only man to actually care enough to make sure I finish.” You joke, though there’s an underlying embarrassment in your voice. One that he catches quickly.

“Do you regret it?” He asks. No malice in his words, just pure curiosity.

You shrug, “I guess I regret that it wasn’t like the books I write. There was no attentiveness, just impulsivity. If I could’ve then I would’ve wanted my first time to be with someone I could fully trust, someone who would treat me carefully knowing it was my first.”

He nods, though you don’t notice it at all. There’s too many things running through his head. You deserved better, even now you deserved the best. He wanted for you to fall in love just like the stories you wrote. The uneasy heartbeats, the anxiousness of not knowing if your feelings were reciprocated, then eventually the love confession that brought on a happy ending.

You deserved it more than anyone in the world.

“But it’s already passed so it’s nothing to dwell on,” You say, sitting up. “Now how about the ramen you brought?”

Jeno knows better than to argue, offering a smile instead.

“Coming right up.”

☆ 📚 ☆

The rest of your week had gone about as well as it could while you were on your period. You of course had to show up to work, despite the cramps and lower back aches, keeping a smile on throughout your shift while experiencing some of the worst discomfort ever.

The only way you survived was because of the pain killers Yuqi had given you and the take out from the restaurant down the street. Jeno hadn’t stopped by as often as you hoped. He told you that Mark was becoming more strict with practice as the group went viral for the third time in the month. You had seen a couple of videos, more recently one that was a q&a with Jeno. You had already known every answer of his, so anyone who considered themselves Jeno fans could suck it.

Speaking of which, he had also told you to hurry home tonight, which you figured was because he finally had time to visit. Your spirits were lifted now, you only hoped it wasn't so obvious as you left work to head straight home.

You squeaked open the door, expecting Meowy to meet you the way she always did with everyone who’d set foot into the apartment. Instead, you were met with a floor full of rose petals, candles (not real ones of course that was a fire hazard), lining up the hallway into your kitchen that was fully decorated with more roses and dinner plates. Your heart skipped a beat, the thought of an intruder stopping by and setting up all of this as a passing thought until you met eyes with Jeno.

He stood wearing a black buttoned up top tucked into the jeans he had on. It was casual enough that you didn’t feel underdressed, having come home straight from work in jeans and a basic tank top you’d put under your work uniform.

“Hey.” He beamed, the same puppy-like way that you were used to but somehow now made your heart feel like it could burst any second.

You freeze for a moment. “What is all of this?”

“Dinner. Oh don’t worry, this is a recipe my family cook taught me how to make so it should be edible.” He jokes, grabbing onto your hand to lead you to your seat. You sit down, overwhelmed by the burst of emotions flowing through your chest, he sits ahead of you.

“Japchae?” He nods. “I would’ve cooked up something like steak but I thought maybe this was a safe bet.”

You pause for a moment, only this time he must notice the shift in your demeanor. “Are you okay?” He asks, a slight tone of fear in his voice, he must’ve thought you were upset.

“I’m just I don’t understand,” You say finally. “Why all of this for me?”

He doesn’t take a single second to think about it, “Because you deserve it.”

“But I'm not- I've never even had a date treat me like this,” You stammer.

He chuckles a response. “Y/N, because I wanted to. How’s that for a reason?”

You still don’t understand it fully. This was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for you, the previous being your mother who gifted you a custom typewriter for your sixth birthday, only this made zero sense. It wasn’t even your birthday.

There must be a hint of hesitance he picks up on, because in a second his hand is over yours in a comforting gesture. “If it helps, think of this as part of our rules. I’m trying to give you inspiration.”

Right, of course. That made perfect sense, why else would Jeno have gone all of his way to set up such a nice dinner like this. You offer a small smile, nodding as you reach for your chopsticks. “Okay, then let’s not let this go to waste.”

Jeno smiles, relieved.

Dinner went well as soon as the alcohol was brought out. One glass was enough to make your nerves disappear , the conversation between you stirring from small gossip he’d learned from Jaemin’s loud mouth to early memories the two of you remember from the first years of your friendships.

The japchae was more than just great you came to find out. Jeno could seriously have become a world class chef if he didn’t stick to his career now, speaking of which had only become way more demanding than ever. But he was happy, and you were even happier than he was. The man was a once in the lifetime talent, he deserved all of the love and recognition in the world.

“Neno,” you said suddenly. “It’s getting pretty late.”

He hums, “Yeah I’ll clean up and I can g—“

“No!” You scream shutting him up. “Stay. Please.”

He laughs, “Okay princess.”

“I’ll be back, just–” You’re suddenly shy, avoiding any eye contact with him. “I’m going to go clean up a bit, maybe after we can cuddle or something.” You hope he doesn’t make you explain more and just gets the memo. Luckily, he grins knowingly. “I’ll be back!” You shout as you run towards the bathroom.

You were never the shy type, but as you step outside of the shower, you feel an overwhelming amount of anxiousness. You slipped into a loose fitting shirt. One Jeno had left behind. He was lying down in your bed, scrolling on his phone until you entered. Jeno’s eyes turn to you, discarding whatever he’d been watching on his phone and sitting up straight on the edge of your bed.

“You’re wearing my shirt,” he states with an expression that you could only describe as want, though it didn’t feel fitting enough.

“I hope that’s okay,” you answer, approaching him until you’re right where he sits. His hand comes up, brushing your cheek. You shiver despite his hand being warm and inviting.

“You’re breathtaking.”

You blush at the compliment, pulling his hand away from your face to move it to your hips, climbing on top of him swiftly. “Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me—“

“Not for that, for everything else.”

“I meant it when I said you deserve it.”

You lean in, his breath catching as your lips connect to his. There’s a subtle desperation in the way he kisses back, where most of your kisses were fervent, this one was full of something more. No fight for dominance but rather a way of expressing your gratitude.

Jeno tugs at his shirt, lifting it off of your body. “Can I?” He asks, earning a nod from you before he’s flipping you onto the mattress. You’re laid completely bare, at least figuratively with the way he’s looking at you, like he’s undressing you with his eyes alone.

You have barely a second to catch your breath, Jeno’s lips trailing over your breasts as he unclasps your bra. You shudder, your chest laid naked as the cool air hits you.

“Fuck– Neno.” You moan as he takes your left breast into his mouth, his tongue flat over the sensitive nub. His hand comes up, palming your right breast, his thumb circling against your nipple.

You’re only growing needier with every second, every lick sending shocks of pleasure throughout your body. He pulls away, and you take the opportunity to pull him in for another kiss, this one heavier than the last. You button his shirt while he’s distracted, pulling it down and discarding it to the floor.

Jeno’s breathless as he pulls away, his eyes full of want. “Can I taste you?”

You nod, and he’s kissing you again. His hand moving to slide your panties off. He reacts in an instant, leaving kisses down your stomach until he’s face to face with your needy cunt.

His breath fanning over your folds, driving you insane with every second he spends refusing to take action. “Please,” you whine. He snaps out of whatever haze he’d been in, his tongue tracing against your folds that leaves you panting.

Your legs fight to close, his hand keeping them stretched open enough for him to continue lapping at your juices in peace. You call his name, moans growing louder as he presses closer against you, his nose pressing against your clit.

Your hands are moving before you can stop them, reaching out to tug on his hair. He moans into your pussy, the sound traveling through you evoking you to moan.

You cry out, twitching around his tongue as he begins to fuck you with the muscle. Your juices mixed with his spit sliding down his chin in a beautiful mess.

His name trails off of your lips like a melody. The sound meshing with the loud squelches of him devouring you. He pulls away, substituting his tongue for his digits.

“Oh my– nghh Neno—“ You can feel tears threatening to spill. The pace of his fingers fucking you rough as he sucks your clit. He continues to fuck his fingers into you, curling them to hit your pleasure point directly. Your legs squeezing around his head as you cum with one last cry of his name.

He laps up your fluids, his nose pressing against your sensitive clit with how messy he is. “Jeno baby, please,” you beg, the overstimulation getting to you. He doesn’t seem to notice, continuing to lick against your folds until you're dragging him to look at you.

His hair is a mess with how much your hands tugged at the strands. He meets your gaze, his lips and chin wet with you, pupils completely dilated. “I’m sorry baby.”

You shake your head, tugging at him to come back up. When he does you’re kissing him, sucking on his tongue to taste more of yourself. He groans into your mouth, pulling away to let out a gasp. “Fuck.”

Your brows furrow, meeting his eyes where he looks down at himself, a small wet patch visible through his pants. He just came untouched from eating you out. A burst of pride shoots through you, drawing you to kiss at him again.

“You’re so fucking hot, can I please take these off of you?” You ask, batting your lashes.

“When you ask like that, who am I to say no?”

You smile, unbuckling his pants and rushing to rip them off of him like the fabric was life threatening. Your hand palms against him, his size growing with the slightest touch of yours.

He’s holding back a groan when you start sucking at his neck, leaving hickeys on display for everyone to see. For everyone to know that he’s yours.

He helps you take off his boxers, another piece of fabric meeting your floor. He's fully erect, the thick muscle hitting against his abdomen with a slap. Your mouth waters at the sight, taking in his size with your eyes and zeroing in on the thick vein that runs along the shaft.

You suck in a breath, envisioning how nice it would be to feel him inside your mouth, his hand forcing your head down until your gagging as he fucks your face. That would have to do another time, for now, you wanted nothing more but to feel him in your guts.

“You like what you see?”

“Corny.” You answer, earning a chuckle from him before he’s pecking your lips again.

“You love me.”

He says it so casually, yet it still makes you feel weak in the knees. “And other things.”

Jeno lines up to your entrance, knocking your breath out of you as he sinks into you. The squeeze is tight, but it’s not unbearable. He’s giving you a few seconds to adjust until you nod at him to continue.

The first thrust is enough to pull a loud moan from your lips, your hands coming around his back to steady yourself. It’s obscene, his hips slapping against your thighs as he drills into you over and over again.

You can already feel pressure start to build up again, your nails digging into his skin drawing a curse from his lips.

“It feels that good, baby?”

“Neno– please please don’t stop—“

“I won't princess.” He says before fucking into you faster, this time his lips swallowing your moans as he kisses you like his life depends on it. Your body feels light, consumed by the feeling of him. You’re crying, you can taste the saltiness of your tears as he kisses you through it.

He must tell you’re close because his hand goes down to rub against your clit, the circular motion sending you close to the edge.

“Come on princess, let go for me baby.”

With those final words you’re clamping down around him, your orgasm flooding down your thighs only producing a wetter sound as he continues to pistol into you. His thrusts grow sloppier until he’s finally reached his own climax. His cum spurting into you, filling you up.

Your words are barely coherent, voice wrecked with all of the screaming you did. You’d have to bake a few apology cookies and offer them to your unlucky neighbors. Jeno kisses around your face, cooing you until your tears stop, his final kiss being one to your lips.

You open your eyes, his own meeting you with what you could only assume was fear, but quickly disappearing just as it happened shifting to one of… you couldn’t tell.

The previous you who had felt bare had nothing on you now. Because even as Jeno pulled out, his cum dripping down into the sheets, you couldn’t help the feeling in your stomach.

Something had changed.

Part Four:

Heart-shaped box

☆ 🎸☆

Jeno was in a funk. Ever since the date he set up he felt insane. Something was different, he knew it deep down. It wasn’t an obvious fact, you had continued to text him like normal, even sending him dress options for the wedding he had sprung onto you so late.

You didn’t mind, casually sending him your finds from shopping trips you went on with Shuhua. He took in a sharp breath every time you sent him a picture, his lungs felt like they would collapse at any moment with how great you looked. Though it was mostly you, even showing up to the wedding with your hand around his arm would provoke that reaction from him.

He imagined it now, you being so close to him as he introduces you to his family. A smile on your face and a light blush because as much as you were a confident speaker you would probably still feel nervous to meet his parents at such an important event.

Jeno got that same weird feeling in his stomach, covering his face so the rest of the guys wouldn’t see.

“Yo are you good” Mark asks, “Your face is all red, you're not sick or anything right?”

“He could be because you can’t help but keep the fucking air conditioner on all through out the night!” Donghyuck argues. Mark rolls his eyes.

“Jeno isn’t sick,” Jaemin moves the back of his hand to check Jeno’s temperature. “Yup not sick.”

“I’m fine guys, really.”

“I don’t think so, you’ve been spacing out a bit lately.” Donghyuck sing songs, “kind of like when Jisung was heartbroken and slumping around like a kicked puppy.”

“I don’t think I was that bad,” jisung replies, earning a “you were” from everyone else.

“Seriously I’m just thinking a lot lately.”

“Wait like really?” That seems to get the group's attention, they get closer, gathering around him like a kettle of vultures.

“You say that like I’m an idiot.”

“An idiot no—“ “debatable.” Donghyuck starts, earning a scowl from Jeno to which he hides behind Mark. “You aren’t one to think about things too much, you're level headed like that.” Jaemin finishes his thought.

“Yeah hyung, so no offense but it’s a once in a lifetime experience to see you act so–“ Jisung contemplates, “so lost.”

Jeno wasn't sure when any of them had caught onto any of that but apparently they did. He really wasn't the type to open up, but there was a time for anything. “Okay yeah, I guess it’s just a lot of changes lately.”

“Go on.”

And so he did. Jeno went on to explain every detail of yours and his arrangement, well the ones that mattered, up until now. The date, the sex, the way he couldn’t help but feel like he was stuck in a Train going down a different path than he ever expected yet he wasn't even mad about it.

“Oh my gosh,” Jaemin squeals. “I knew you were both meant to be!”

“Great going Jeno, I owe him five dollars now I hope you're happy."

“What?” Jeno asks.

“Jaemin did always say he had a gut feeling that you and Y/N would end up together,” Mark agreed. “That bet lasted shorter than expected though.”

“I think you’re confused,” Jeno starts. “It’s not like that. Me and Y/N are just friends with benefits.”

“Right and the benefits include date nights, home cooked meals, and life altering sex after?” Donghyuck taunts. Jisung makes a look of disgust at the last part.

“As much as I don’t think the last part was necessary,” Donghyuck shrugs. “I do agree. That's not at all what friends with benefits do.”

Jeno isn’t sure what to say. Was he at fault for this sudden shift? It felt like he was, but then again you didn’t seem to act like anything was wrong either. Maybe the guys were being dramatic. Jaemin looks at him like he knows what Jeno is trying to do.

“Answer this one thing,” Jaemin starts. “Do you feel your heart beat a little faster around her?”

Jeno nods.

“And when you think about her. What about then?”

Jeno felt the blood creep up his neck. How the hell would Jaemin be able to tell that.

“Think about it Jeno, it shouldn’t be that hard.”

Jeno frowns. Could he be… no. There’s no way. But then he thinks back to you, your contagious laughs and smiles.

Oh.

“What does this mean now?”

“Well you’ve already got the grand gestures down, loverboy.”

“This time, just add the confession.” Jisung adds.

☆ 📚 ☆

Time had gone by quicker than you’d thought. The continuous dress shopping leading up to this exact moment. You had packed up well, joining Jeno in road-tripping to Jeju island. It consisted mainly of sleeping, singing along to music completely off key, and feeding Jeno snacks while he drove.

You hadn’t felt the subtle shift in the area around each other, not when every time you looked away he made sure to keep his eyes on you until he couldn’t.

The wedding was in the afternoon. A ceremony that would end with a sunset. This made for really good inspiration for the third part in your book series, so you made sure to make a mental note of it.

You changed into your dress, hidden in one of the hotel’s rooms as Jeno got ready with the rest of his immediate family. You felt nervous, the outfit fitting way more exposed than you were used to.

“Y/N! Can I come in?”

“Uh, yes!” Seulgi walks in, a bright smile on her face as she does. “I didn’t think you’d have time to stop by and do anything.”

“Yeah well, I promised Jeno I would check in on you,” She gives you a look over, “You look beautiful.”

You blush, “No of course not, you look great.”

“I do, don’t I.” She does a bit of a twirl, the sleek yet elegant white gown hardly moving except for the flared fabric at the bottom.

You’d never imagined a life of marriage for you, but seeing Seulgi look so bright and happy made you second guess. Perhaps there could be someone to change that? Perhaps even–

“Jeno’s waiting outside. I’m going to go set myself up for pictures before the ceremony begins.” She gives you one last nod. “I’m glad you came.”

You offer a smile in return, “Thank you for inviting me.”

You had unfortunately not been able to catch Jeno before the ceremony began, sitting on the outskirts as the family sat front row to Seulgi, as did her wife’s family in the opposite direction. Jeno had made sure that even with the distance, at any opportunity he would look at you.

Goosebumps rising on your body with the way he looked into your eyes so sure. And with every vow spoken, it almost felt like he meant it to you. You had to take a breath the second it ended, being pulled by one of Jeno’s cousins who had claimed you as her new best friend. She dragged you towards the drinks, offering you a glass of champagne that you held onto.

Beyond the live orchestra that you were sure you would only live to see once in your lifetime, there was nothing but cheers for the happy couple. You were a bit too invested to have noticed Jeno sneak behind you, his hand tapping on your shoulder.

“I didn’t get the chance to tell you how beautiful you look.” He says, staring at you with a quiet longing you didn't pick up on.

“You can tell me now,” You tease.

He chuckles, his hand hesitating for a moment before it finds its way around your waist, pulling you closer as his lips graze your ear. “Youre the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” You don’t even get the chance to reply, the words falling flat on your tongue.

“What an honor it is to meet you.”

You look up to see the same woman who had stood up on stage before, Mrs. Lee. The musical genius in the flesh. Jeno, quickly moving to give the two of you space to talk, though remaining close enough.

You bow quickly, a perfect ninety degrees. “No, it's an honor to meet you. Your work is truly inspiring, I tell Jeno everyday just how lucky he is to have a mother so efficient and hardworking.”

She brightens, “Do you study music as well?”

“No ma’am, unfortunately I’m tone deaf but I appreciate it all the much more.” You reply shyly. “I’m a writer.”

“Ah,” Her smile widens, “That’s beautiful. I am quite fond of authors myself, please do tell me what you happen to write?”

“I’m only now starting, but if all things go to plan I should have my first novel released soon.” You nod, looking at Jeno who hadn’t once let go of his hold on your waist. As if sensing it, his mother turns attention to the area, smirking playfully.

“Well I do wish to own a copy once it does release, and Jeno.” She beckons her son. “Do bring her again more often, I think the two of you make the perfect pair.”

She apologies, stepping back into the celebration. You feel like a weight was lifted off of your chest, somehow wanting nothing more than the woman’s approval.

“Oh my god, I shouldn’t have mentioned that. How do I even talk about my book with her when you inspired half of it.”

Jeno laughs, “I don’t think she minds. She knows more than she lets on, she just likes for people to introduce themselves anyway.”

Your eyes widen, "You're saying she probably has a hundred page long history on my entire existence?”

“A hundred pages sure sounds humble,” he jokes.

“Neno!”

“I know, I'm only joking.” His hand comes up to smooth over your cheek. You can’t help but lean into his hold, breathing in the subtle hint of wood from the cologne he must’ve put on as he got ready. “Can I show you somewhere?”

“That sounds like something a murderer would say,” He sighs and despite your heart thundering you continue. “But yes.”

The first thing you notice is how silent it is besides the waves crashing into the sand. The entire property had been closed off, a subtle flex Jeno hadn’t intended when he told you about the place on the drive over. It was dark despite the fairy lights hanging off the building, the only real lighting coming from the full moon that was cast up above you.

You think of all of the possibilities that could come about in your book. Every piece of inspiration coming from the past few months up until this moment. Only you knew it couldn’t continue this way, not with how risky it became. Not when you realized just by looking at Jeno in his suit, laughing with the rest of his family just how easy it would be to get used to this. To crave more.

“Do you like this place?”

“I love it.” You speak carefully, suddenly overwhelmed with how comfortable the silence was between you two. You're not sure when your chest became so heavy, or when breathing felt like a pierced blade to your chest.

“Princess.” Jeno calls you, and you wish you could answer him but you just can’t. He must’ve repeated himself again, because the next second he’s at your side forcing you to look into his eyes.

And even with the rough lighting and the blurry vision, he still took away every last bit of your sanity. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

You can tell he’s stressed, and you aren’t even sure when you started to cry but here you were with your makeup probably ruined, struggling to catch a breath. When did it become so hard to look at him without feeling like the world was crumbling beneath you? When did his pure existence have such profound meaning to you? No, that you could answer, because even a panic attack couldn’t take away from the fact that you loved Lee Jeno.

“I–“ You try to speak, only embarrassing yourself as you choke up on the words, warm tears spilling down your face.

“Hey, look at me. It’s okay, we’re okay.”

No, everything was not okay. You had fucked up the only rule that really mattered. You had done yourself the worst by falling in love with him.

“Y/N.” He’s clearly worried, though he masks it well enough. You look up at him, “I’m sorry, I made the rules myself and I couldn’t even follow them.”

“What do you mean?”

“I think I– no. I know it now. I’m in love with you.” You close your eyes refusing to look at him. “I didn’t mean to, and I know this is so sudden and you don’t feel the same at all but I just—“

You never get the chance to finish your sentence. His lips come crashing into yours, the same passion from the kiss you’d shared only nights before. He’s pouring every ounce of a love confession to you, hoping it will be enough to clear your mind of any doubts you had that he wasn’t yearning for your love.

He’s the oxygen you need to breathe. That’s your first thought when he pulls away. “I was supposed to be the one to tell you first.” He whispers.

“Then maybe you should’ve said it sooner,” You taunt, his thumb tracing over your tear stained cheeks.

He frowns, “I promise I was going to. It just took me a bit longer to realize.”

You gasp, feigning offense. “Wow, here I am pouring my heart out to you and instead you let me embarrass myself!”

“It’s not embarrassing to see you cry, you’re pretty even when you do.”

You hope it’s dark enough for him not to notice how flustered you are. “Don’t use flattery to get out of this!”

“Oh?” He pokes at your cheek. “But you seem to enjoy it a lot.”

He closes the distance, pecking the corner of your lips that results in a bashful smile from you. “Don’t worry, you have the rest of our lives to get used to my compliments.”

“Is that your way of saying you’re madly in love with me?”

“I think the kiss established that earlier. But yes Y/N, and I’d love for you to be my girlfriend too.”

“Ah,” you contemplate. “What are the benefits?”

“Everything we’ve done the past few months and more, you just got to experience the free trial.”

You shove at him playfully. “Then I gladly accept.” You say, and before he can give a snarky response you’re pulling him closer. Closing the distance between the two of you to share a kiss, this time as lovers.

Epilogue

Scary Love

It was Déjà vu. You sat anxiously in the same office you’d been in before. Only this time, you were confident that Shuhua wouldn’t turn you away, oh and of course the fingers you had been fiddling with happened to be of the man sitting right beside you.

Shuhua sets the papers down, her expression flat.

“So?” You grow more anxious, biting your bottom lip.

“I’ll let the graphic design department begin searching for an artist to go along with your cover art.” Your eyes widen. “It's wonderful.”

You jump up, dragging Jeno up on his own feet to celebrate with a hug. He smiles, not at all minding the fact that you’d just manhandled him.

You turn and face Shuhua then, tears brimming in the corner of your eyes. “Shuhua!”

“Don’t cry you big baby, you were always going to make it, you just needed more time.” She smiles, pulling you in for a short hug. “I’m proud of you y/n.”

“How am I not supposed to cry when you say things like that!”

The two of them laugh at you as you hug Jeno, hiding your face in his shirt. “I told you she’d love it.” Jeno says, patting your back. You look up at him, “It’s really thanks to you.”

He chuckles, “Thanks princess, but I wasn’t the one who wrote it.”

“Ah but you're the one who inspired it all!” You tease him, “Maybe I should add you as a co-writer.”

“Mhmm I’m sure my fans would be taken aback.”

“I don’t think they’d mind. Lee Jeno is known for being multiskilled after all.”

“Don’t you guys have places to be,” Shuhua groans. “I heard you booked a sold out show.”

“Oh right!” You exclaim, “we should really get going, don't want to keep anyone waiting.”

“Right, go on and leave! Take your puppy with you!”

Oblivion had really reached new heights of popularity, they’d been working so hard these past few months working on pushing out a full album that you had almost forgotten how your boyfriend looked. You giggle at the thought, you were Lee Jeno’s girlfriend.

The fans quickly took a liking to you, with how loud and relatable your personality was. They’d even spotted the two of you on a date (if you can call grocery shopping that) not too long ago, asking for a picture with Jeno that you quickly agreed to. Jeno, as humble as ever, had gushed at their compliments. And when the fan suddenly turned to you asking if they could also have a picture, Jeno was way too quick to take fifty of them.

Things were great, even with the busy schedules between the two of you, you made sure to make time to go to his shows.

“Guys, we’re going to need you on stage in the next ten minutes.” Chenle, Oblivion’s new manager, reminded everyone.

“Yes sir!” Mark saluted the man, “You heard him guys, hurry up.”

“I’m going to miss you.” You pout, running your hands over your boyfriend's forearm.

“Don’t be silly, I’m going to be looking right at you.”

“I don’t think the fans will appreciate that.”

“No they will,” Darling adds into your conversation. “They’ll add it to your cutest couple moments compilations.”

“You sound like you know them so well.”

“She has secret chat rooms with them,” Donghyuck squints at darling. “Where else would they have gotten those pictures of me and Jaemin.”

Jaemin wrapped an arm around the tan man. “Nope, all me.”

You laugh at the two of them, Jeno’s arms wrapping around you and he snuggles into your neck. “Do you want to come up on stage later?”

“Neno you know I can’t.”

“You can if it’s an encore,” he sighs. He really does look like such a puppy when he makes those eyes. “Please baby.”

You couldn’t say no to him. “Fine.”

He smiles, pulling you in for a short and sweet kiss that's partially interrupted by Chenle stopping by again to shout, "Five more minutes!”

“You guys are kind of disgusting.” Jisung scowls but from where he has his head laying to rest on darling’s shoulder.

“You say that, but need we remind you of the heinous acts the two of you got up to before our show?” Jeno threatens the couple with a smile on his face.

They match each other’s beet red. The rest of the band turned to laugh at the pair, teasing the couple further. That reminded you.

“Neno,” You ask. “Have you ever considered red hair?”

By the time the last song ended the crowd pushed for more, which meant that you could make do of your promise to your boyfriend. Security allowed for you to pass through and onto the stage, Jeno capturing your entire body the second you got close. “I missed you.”

“I thought you said you’d be looking right at me.”

“Yeah but that only made me miss you more.”

The band, as per fan request, chose to perform their final song again, this time with a twist. Jisung was to take over lead vocals as the rest of them swapped instruments, safe for Jeno who instead had to direct you to play for him.

You sat on his lap, a bright smile on your face that was battling the stage lights. You’d never felt happier, you think, sitting with Jeno. A part of it scared you, not knowing what could come out of this. You hadn’t ever expected to be living as one of your novels, but here was the man in front of you willing to give you your happy ending. Loving you so openly despite his similar fears.

“Here,” he gives you a drum stick. You accept holding onto it as his bigger hand wraps around yours. “Follow my lead.” He brings the stick down, hitting the snare with light force. Not enough to have you jumping off of him but enough for you to squeal in shock. 

His laughs fill your ears despite the heavy music and crowd. And as you turn back barely able to look straight into his eyes, you find him already looking into yours. This time with an expression you find easy to recognize with how much you love him too. 

You realize it then, you’d follow his lead anywhere.

࣪𖤐 the end ── ★ ̟

FINAL NOTES: This one was so much less angsty than the other one and I was scared if that would affect the readers experience but my beta reader said that both stories were on par with one another… Anyway i’m happy to write more of these two in the next part.. Donghyuck biases i hope ur excited!!

taglist: @jwilous @haechanahceah67 @vsrenne @reveries01 @bluesbliss @crzyhyuck @miauumin @yesohhsehun @kittydollzz @hi00000234567 @zhapire @babyjieee @kzyhycklvr @thisgomdo @honeybeehorizon @notmastyle @idkwiexist @stormy1408 @positionslab @neobeesprout @hyuckluverr @jwikyo @haylandthewoods-blog @oneuluihaechan @alili-milidoy @okkkcausewhet @kkkkkeonho @klowiishere @fancypeacepersona @dior-15 @voucearse @bluedbliss @beomgyus11 @zhapire @t3kandson @firydst @hancafe @saranghoeforanton @strawbabyz @cupid4hae

[vnti-vnxiety-recs]

Not! The Norm (M)

★ PAIRING: sociallyawkward!semi-agoraphobic!Reader x Neighbor!Jeno

☆ WORD COUNT: 13.9k~

★ GENRE(S): strangers to friends, friends to lovers, slow burn, fluff, smut

☆ SUMMARY: You move to a new city, hoping the change will help you get out of your comfort zone. When you meet your neighbor Jeno, he ends up becoming a friend who turns your world upside down.

★ ☆ WARNINGS: unprotected sex, drinking, drunken recklessness, MDNI, 18+

☆★ NOTES: I’m sorry to announce that this is probably the last fic I’ll ever write lowkey. I’m going back to college and haven’t really felt the motivation to write lately. I won’t be deactivating my account, and my ask box will still be open if you want to chat but response might be slow TT. I made sure to write this one with love. Thanks for all the support!

𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬

Your life was simple. Work, sleep, eat. Rinse and repeat. Day after day, it was the same unchanging cycle, and strangely, you didn’t mind. There was a comfort in the predictability, a sense of stability that kept everything steady. This routine might have been repetitive, but it was reliable and safe. For as long as you could remember, you had lived by a quiet motto: Simplicity is security.

You didn’t go out much, only if absolutely necessary. Your hobbies were mostly indoor activities like reading, drawing, playing video games, or sewing small projects. The only thing that kept you from the comfort of your home most days was your job, but even that was about to change. You had recently been hired for a  work from home position that paid more than your previous job. When you found out that the new role would require you to move to a different town, you didn’t feel even a flicker of hesitation. Some might have called you a shut-in, but you saw it differently. To you, it was about protecting your peace

The day you moved in the neighborhood was quiet. Your apartment was tucked away on a cozy corner of the street. It was within walking distance of a small shopping center just a few blocks away, making errands convenient without the hustle and bustle. The apartment was a massive building that looked like it had seen better days. It resembled an old dormitory, its brick walls are weathered and moss creeps into the cracks. Despite its worn exterior, there was a certain character to the building. There was something warm and inviting about it.

The weather was dreary, gray clouds hung heavy in the sky threatening a light drizzle. Despite the gloom, you found yourself surprisingly upbeat.  Maybe it was the excitement of a fresh start, or perhaps it was the comfort of knowing you’d be in a familiar routine soon enough. Whatever it was, you clung to that small flicker of optimism as you carried your boxes inside.

The air inside smells faintly of old wood and dust. The wear and tear were evident. The paint on the wooden trim was peeling, and in some spots, the stairs bore dents and scratches where footsteps had worn down the wood over the years. 

You sat the last box from the U-Haul down with a satisfying thud. your arms aching from the day's work.The building had no elevators. Instead it just had a large, winding staircase that spiraled from the ground floor up to the upper levels. When you first received the keys to your apartment, you’d immediately complained about the lack of an elevator. The landlord had simply shrugged and explained that the old elevators had been deemed a hazard. The maintenance team had decided they were too risky to repair, so they’d been walled off and left untouched.

You breathe out a sigh, wiping your brow as you toss your keys onto the small table near the door. Your shoulders slump as you peel off your jacket, letting it fall to the floor. “I’ll return the U-Haul tomorrow,” you think with a quiet resignation. You have done enough today.

You settle onto the cool wooden planks of your walkway, stretching out on your back to cool down after the long day. Your eyelids flutter as fatigue sinks in. Just as you're about to drift off, faint voices drift through the open window. It sounded like playful bickering and laughter. You try to ignore it, but curiosity nudges you. You’re nosy by nature, Besides, nothing much ever happens in your quiet life. A bit of drama never hurt, especially when it’s not your own. You sit up slowly and glance outside. Through the window, you see a moving truck parked next to yours. Standing on the sidewalk is a broad-shouldered figure, patiently waiting as his smaller friend hurriedly loads boxes into his arms. You can’t see their faces, your window’s too high and the boxes obscure most of your view. You catch snippets of their voices. There is some teasing, some frustration, but mostly playful banter. You watch as they come and go, tossing boxes off the truck and joking around. Their laughter echoes softly in the quiet street.

After a few moments, you yawn and decide it’s time to retreat. You pull the blinds shut, feeling the tired ache in your feet. A long soak in the tub sounds perfect.

𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬

It’s been a month since you moved in. Your days have once again settled into a predictable rhythm. Work, errands, sleep, repeat. Nothing much changes, and that's exactly how you like it. 

Early the next morning, your alarm buzzes insistently on your bedside table. You reach out and swipe it silent. You sit up and stretch before you toss on something comfortable. You settle on leggings and a loose top. Today’s plan was to beat the crowd to the farmers market by getting there right when it opens.

As you lock the door behind you, a sudden sound of footsteps makes your shoulders tense. You hate small talk with a passion. The idea of awkwardly exchanging greetings with neighbors feels like an unnecessary burden. The thought of having to stand there, forcing a polite smile and exchanging meaningless greetings, makes you start to retreat. Just as you finish unlocking the door a cheerful voice calls out, stopping you in your tracks before you can slip back inside.

“Oh! Hi! I don’t think I’ve had the chance to properly introduce myself.”

 You freeze mid step and turn toward the voice

Standing there is a tall figure, someone around your age. His smile is charming,  the kind that looks like it comes easy. His eyes crinkle into crescent moons as he regards you with friendly curiosity and extends a hand.

“I’m Jeno,” he says confidently. "I just moved in down the hall."

You blink, caught off guard by his charm. For a moment, words evade you as you meet his gaze. Your grip is light and tentative as you shake his hand. You mutter out your own greeting and you think you’re speaking loud enough, but Jeno has to lean in slightly to hear you better.

“Sorry, one more time,” he says.

You chuckle nervously, clearing your throat. “Sorry, I don’t talk to people very often,” you admit, raising your voice just a bit. “I’m Y/N” 

“It’s nice to meet you. I think I’ve seen you a few times. You’re kind of hard to come by,” Jeno jokes.

“I don’t leave the house much,” you reply with a small smile, crossing your arms and shrugging. “But unfortunately, I need to go to the grocery store today.”

“Really? Same here,” Jeno says, his eyes lighting up. “I just came back upstairs to grab my wallet. Do you want to go together? I usually hit the little farmers market around the corner. What about you?”

“Me too,” you say, forcing a smile. Inside, you’re practically melting down. You’ve never talked this long to any neighbor, especially not someone as charming as him. You want to run in the opposite direction, but your not sure how to politely decline.

You walk down the stairs together, and Jeno keeps talking, but you can’t even meet his eyes. This was probably your worse nightmare come true, trapped in conversation with a really attractive guy.

“Thanks,” you murmur softly as he holds the door open for you.

Jeno nods with a warm smile and follows behind you as you step outside. The morning sun casts a gentle glow on his features. 

“So,” he begins casually.  “How long have you been living here?”

You fiddle with your keys as you walk. “It’s been about a month now,” you reply. “Not too long. I guess I’m still getting familiar with the neighborhood.”

He nods thoughtfully, glancing around. “Yeah, it’s a pretty quiet spot. Not much happens around here, but I like that. It’s a nice change of pace from where I come from.”

Curious, you glance over. “Oh, really? Where'd you move from?”

He smiles. “A bigger city. It was always so loud and crowded. When I was younger, I loved it. I was always getting into trouble. But now… I need something calmer. This neighborhood seemed like the perfect place to start fresh.”

“You’ll have to tell me some of those stories.” You say.

You were curious about Jeno, he had such a sweet face that you didn't take him as a trouble maker. The conversation flows more smoothly now that you’ve warmed up to each other. You learn that it was mainly Jeno’s friends who dragged him into trouble. They sound like a fun group they way that Jeno describes them. You can't help but laugh through most of his stories.

As you approach the corner of the next street, the distant chatter from the farmers' market grows louder. When you finally arrive at the market, you both share a small smile.

“Thanks for walking with me,” you say softly. “It was nice talking to you.”

Jeno grins. “Same here. Hopefully we’ll bump into each other again.”

You turn to head toward your own shopping. The world feels a little less ordinary today.

𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬

Later, you’re almost finished with your shopping, checking off the last item on your list. You put the carton of eggs in your basket when a familiar face catches your attention. Turning slightly, you see Jeno standing in the dairy aisle, examining a block of cheese. He catches your gaze with a gentle smile. ”Hey Stranger.” 

You find yourself smiling back.  Without thinking, your lips curl up into a genuine smile.

“Hi,” you reply and start fiddling with the handle of your shopping basket.

He closes the distance between you. “Are you done shopping?” he asks casually.

“Yup,” you say, glancing down at your list. “What about you?”

He nods. "Me too. How about we walk back together? I can carry all your bags, make it easier for you."

You let out a sigh, feeling a sense apprehension. The first walk wasn’t terrible, he was surprisingly pleasant company. But the thought of being alone with him again makes your stomach twist nervously. Still, you remind yourself that carrying all these groceries home alone isn’t exactly ideal either.

“Okay, let’s check out,” you decide.

As you approach the checkout line, you steal a glance at Jeno's basket. It's surprisingly empty, considering the length of your shopping trip. You're on the verge of asking where all his groceries are when you catch yourself, unsure if it would come off as rude or nosy. You bite your tongue and keep your thoughts to yourself.

Jeno steps forward, placing his meager items on the conveyor belt. He pays swiftly, then turns to you, his hands outstretched to help with your groceries.

When your turn comes to pay, Jeno beats you to it, his card already halfway through the reader. You reach for your wallet, but it's too late. He's already signed the receipt, a nonchalant smile on his face.

Your eyes widen in disbelief as you realize what he's done. Your jaw drops as you realize how much he had spent. You had put a  month's worth of groceries in your basket. Your hands shake slightly as you protest, "How could you pay for my things? That's too much!"

He waves off your concern, "It's no big deal. I don't mind at all."

"No, I need to pay you back," you insist. You hate the idea of owing anyone, and the thought of getting things for free makes you feel even worse. 

Jeno notices the seriousness in your expression and immediately softens. "Hey, you can just send me the money later," he says.

Relief washes over your shoulders, and you take a deep breath, feeling your tension ease slightly. Your shoulders relax as you nod, grateful but still feeling a bit awkward about the situation.

You make your way back to the apartment together. Once you make it home you ask Jeno for his cash app, venmo, paypal, or anything so that you could pay him back. He pauses for a beat, then pretends not to hear you. He helps you set your groceries down before he turns and walks off down the hall, leaving you standing there stunned. He had tricked you.

Jeno was an anomaly, something that shook up your daily routine. Jeno was unpredictable which made him dangerous in your eyes. Jeno was something you were not prepared for.

You don’t see Jeno for a while, choosing to stay inside most days, avoiding the outside world as much as possible. When it’s finally time to go to the market again, you pray to all the gods above that you won’t run into him. Just as you're about to head downstairs, a familiar voice calls out, “Can I join you?” 

Curse your luck.

He doesn’t even ask where you’re going, as if he already knows that you don’t leave for much other than shopping. You shake your head and keep walking, your steps steady and deliberate. Today, you really don’t want to be bothered. You’re wary of him buying your groceries again and putting you further in debt to him.

About halfway down the staircase, he calls out, confusion clear in his voice. "What’s wrong?"

You glance back at him, offering a small, polite smile. "Nothing, it's just easier to shop for myself if I go alone," you reply softly.

Jeno steps onto the middle landing, catching up to you. The sunlight from the wide window behind the staircase pours in. The window itself is tall and arched, with delicate stained glass details that catch the light and scatter tiny rainbows onto the stairs. He reaches out, his hand hovering near your waist, not touching, just trying to block your path. It's like a scene from one of the romance novels you read. 

"Listen, if it's about the last time, I'm sorry. I won't buy your groceries again if it means—" Jeno stops himself, rambling, "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable, I should have asked. I didn’t think you would mind.”

It did make you uncomfortable. You're not used to this kind of attention, this level of closeness, you barely knew him. You know it was probably something stupid to complain about but the act of someone doing something nice for you just to hold it over your head wasn't a foreign occurrence. You instinctively step back just a little and speak again, your voice remains gentle but firm.

"It's okay," you say quietly, avoiding his gaze. "I just prefer to do things my own way. I appreciate your concern, but I’m used to taking care of myself." 

Your words are kind but clear, signaling that you’re not ready to accept his help or his proximity just yet.

𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬

It doesn’t take a month this time for you to see Jeno. This time, it’s only two weeks.

You were busy playing a puzzle game on your DS when you heard the knock at your door. You groan in annoyance, your focus broken after ten minutes of trying to solve this frustrating puzzle. With a sigh, you shuffle over and crack the door open slightly, peering coldly through the crack.

Jeno stands there, a tentative smile on his face. “Hey, I’m sorry to bother you. I was wondering if you wanted to watch a movie or something?”

There he was again, asking to be in your company, as if it was nothing. He really didn't know when to give up. You’ve never known anyone to take this much interest in you. You haven’t had much experience talking to guys, you didn't really like their attention.

“They just added the new Studio Ghibli movie on Netflix,” he says, biting his lip nervously. “You mentioned it briefly the last time we walked. I thought maybe we could watch it together.”

“I love those movies,” you say, your previous annoyance fading as you think about the new Ghibli film. Your face brightens, and a genuine smile spreads across your lips.

“I just need to finish this puzzle,” you add, glancing back at the DS screen.

“Puzzle? Can I help?” Jeno asks curiously.

You nod determinedly. Two brains are better than one, and as much as you’d like to just Google the answer, you’d rather phone a friend. Without hesitation, you step aside and gesture for him to come in. He slips off his shoes by the door and sets them next to yours.

His eyes scan your quarters as you lead him into the living room. Your apartment feels warm and inviting. Plants hang from the ceiling near the kitchen window, swaying gently. You had a desk set up in the dining room space that Jeno assumed you had made into an office area. The mood lighting in the corners of the living room casts a soft, warm glow over everything. The TV is mounted on the wall opposite a small, cluttered couch with a throw blanket and pillows that leave barely enough room to sit. 

You make space for him on the couch and hand him your Nintendo DS. “Here,” you say quietly. 

He takes the device, eyes flickering between the screen and you. You lean in slightly, hopeful. “So, we have to cross through all nine dots with just four lines,” you explain.

Jeno studies the screen. He fiddles with the controls, trying to find a solution, but he doesn’t have any better luck than you. About twenty minutes pass, and both of you sit there more confused than when you started.

Finally, you sigh and admit defeat. “Let’s just Google it. I give up.”

Jeno shakes his head, determination flickering in his eyes. “No, we can do this. Believe in us. We’re so close.”

“My brain is going to melt. Can we at least try another one? I’ve been stuck on that puzzle forever,” you say, frustration creeping into your voice. The movie has been long forgotten in the back of your mind as you and Jeno sit close on the couch. You’re practically perched on his shoulder, watching him maneuver your character through the game.

Jeno continues on trying to solve the puzzle, determined to not let a game out smart him. You don’t realize how close you’ve become until Jeno finally solves the puzzle and turns to look at you with a triumphant smile on his face. You’re about a breath away but Jeno doesn’t lean away yet. The air around you feels almost magnetic, as if something wants to pull you closer. You can feel the heat crawling up your face, and your heart pounds a little faster. In your embarrassment, you're the first to look away as you shift awkwardly on the couch.

Jeno tries his best to break the tension. “Do you work from home?” Jeno asks, changing the subject. His attention was towards your office space and wondered if that was the reason you never left home.

“I do,” you reply softly, grabbing a nearby pillow to hold in your lap for comfort. “ But lately I think maybe it’s not so good for me.”

Why do you say that?” he asks, turning his body to face you, his tone gentle.

You hesitate for a moment before speaking. “Well…before, at least I was forced to interact with people. But now since I don’t leave…there’s no one. I feel like I’m growing more antisocial by the day.”

Jeno nods in understanding. “You’re not as bad at socializing as you think,” he shrugs casually.

You shake your head and sigh. “You’re just saying that.”

Jeno sets down the DS on your coffee table and scoots closer to you, his expression earnest. “Hey, I mean it. I like you,” he says seriously. His eyes suddenly widen as he realizes what he just said, but he doesn’t take it back.

You blink twice before nodding slowly. “Thank you.”

Jeno offers a nervous smile. For the first time his eyes avoid yours as he awkwardly looks around your living room, trying to find something else to talk about.

“Do you still want to watch that movie?” He asks.

You nod with a shy smile, feeling a little nervous. You’d never watched a movie alone with a guy before, and right now, the setting feels unexpectedly intimate. You were so caught up in trying to solve your puzzles that you hadn’t realized how casual this all was.

“Let me know if it gets too cold,” you say, turning on the TV and settling into the couch.

Jeno nods, and you both focus on the screen. About halfway through, he shifts slightly to get comfortable, and somehow, he ends up even closer. His thigh pressed up against yours. The warmth from his body burns and your heart skips a beat.

You almost don’t hear him when he softly asks for a pillow. You follow his finger to the pillow resting in your lap, and your brow raises in question.

“You want to cuddle with one?” you ask.

He nods, pointing at the pillow in your lap. “I want that one,” he says with a daring smile.

Your eyebrows furrow and Jeno can't help but laugh at your expression. “Come on,” he says between a chuckle. “You have like ten pillows over there.”

“Choose another,” you say stubbornly.

He chuckles, amused by your stubbornness. “So stingy,” he teases. Then, without warning, he adds, “Fine, I'll just use you.”

You’re not sure what he means at first until he lays his head on your lap, looking up at you with a smile.

There’s something quietly domestic about the scene. The way his shoes sit beside yours by the door, him fighting over your favorite pillow and now his head resting in your lap. It feels intimate and unexpectedly comforting. 

Your heart flutters, but you quickly stomp down the feeling. Nothing good ever comes  from feeling things like this. You turn your attention back to the TV and press play on the movie.

You find yourself enjoying his company more than you expected. His warmth that seeps into your skin loosening up the tension in your body. You’re grateful he hadn’t made a move, that he was just content with cuddling and laughing along with you during the funny parts of the movie. It feels safe, but most importantly, it feels right.

When the credits roll, there's a bittersweet taste in your mouth. Your time with Jeno has come to an end.

You glance down, he had taken the pillow from your lap sometime during the movie and had been fidgeting with it. He was mindlessly humming along to the song that played during the credits.

You hesitate, your heart pounding a little. “Are you leaving now?” You finally ask.

“Yeah, it’s getting late,” Jeno answers, sitting up and stretching. He stands up from the couch, a gentle smile lingering on his face. “It was nice hanging out with you today.”

You sit up a little too quickly at that. “Can we hang out again?” you blurt out, immediately cringing at how eager you sound. 

Jeno’s expression softens. “Of course we can,” he says.

His hand reaches out toward your face, and for a moment, you think he’s about to pull you into a kiss. Instead, he picks something out of your hair. “Sorry, there was a lint,” he says casually.

You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding, and a small, relieved laugh escapes. “Thank you,” you say softly, your voice trembling slightly as you manage a shy smile.

You walk him to the door and bid him farewell.

You stand there for a moment after he leaves. Your heart was pounding with that familiar, annoying flutter in your chest. A flicker of fear rises in you. You couldn’t fall in love with Jeno. Love hurt, and you already carried enough scars to last a lifetime.

𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬

You’re in your apartment’s lobby, checking your mail when you hear the door open and close noisily. You look up, and your heart is immediately stolen. Sitting comfortably in Jeno’s arms is a fluffy white puppy. 

"Aw, how cute," you coo, hurrying closer. In your excitement, you completely forget about checking your mail, leaving your keys in the mailbox and the little door ajar.

Jeno smiles at you, “I prefer handsome, but cute works too,” he says jokingly .

You laugh at the quip before focusing back on the adorable puppy in his arms. “What’s his name?”

“Hayan,” he tells you with a soft smile. “He’s my friend’s dog. I’m just watching him while he’s out of town.” He shrugs. “I'm more of a cat person.”

“Hi, Hayan!” you coo. “What does his name mean? Hayan?” you ask, tilting your head curiously at Jeno.

“Just means ‘white,’” he says with a shrug.

“Very creative,” you tease, grinning.

“I didn’t name him,” he says defensively.

You smile warmly and shake your head. “Well, I don’t want to hold you up. Sorry to keep you,” you say. Your eyes linger on the puppy.

Jeno knows you well enough to sense you’re just giving him an out. “It’s always a pleasure to talk to you, you know that, right?” He chuckles. “Do you want to come over and hang out with him?”

Your face lights up, and you nod enthusiastically, already starting to make your way toward the stairs. Jeno calls out after you, “Your mail!”

You glance down at the mail in your hand and shrug. “What about it?”

He points with a small laugh, “Your keys are still in your mailbox.”

Your cheeks flush with embarrassment, and you quickly walk over to retrieve your keys, locking the mailbox. “Sorry, I got distracted,” you mumble.

Jeno shakes his head, “Come on.” The puppy in his arms yawning cutely as it falls back asleep on his chest.

The juxtaposition of the sight was stirring something deep inside you. Jeno’s strong arms and broad chest surrounding the small puppy. The way he held Hayan so carefully, so protectively, made your stomach flutter. You found yourself yearning for Jeno to be wrapped around you like that. 

You walk up the stairs side by side, your gaze flickering back to the adorable puppy whose peaceful face and tiny yawn make your heart soften. Once you reach the door, Jeno digs into his pocket for his keys, and you wait in anticipation. You had always wondered what Jeno’s place looked like.

“Wanna hold him while I get the door open?” Jeno asks.

You nod happily. You carefully take Hayan from Jeno’s arms, pressing a soft kiss onto the puppy’s fluffy head and petting him gently. Jeno opens the door, and you walk into his living room, placing your mail on the coffee table. Your eyes drift around his apartment, analyzing everything to get a better look into Jeno’s life. Jeno’s home smells of amber and something woody. The layout is identical to yours but the vibe was completely different. There’s a soft, plush rug covering the wooden floor and a comfortable looking couch sits on top of it. A bookshelf lines one wall, filled with a mix of manga, novels, and little trinkets. You look at all of the small souvenirs and photos that hint at his interests and personal life. 

You settle onto the couch. Hayan is still sleepy, and begins to doze off on your lap. His tiny paws and nose twitch adorably as he dreams. You don’t want to disturb his nap, so you sit perfectly still. Jeno just smiles softly before walking into the kitchen.

 “Are you thirsty?” Jeno asks casually as he gets a water bottle from the fridge.

You shake your head. Jeno shrugs, “I’m going to hit the shower. You can stay as long as you want,” he says before heading down the hall.

As he leaves, your eyes drift back around the apartment. You couldn't do much else, your phone was in your back pocket and you didn’t want to risk stirring Hayan. You occupy yourself with committing Jeno’s apartment to memory. Your gaze lands on a photo on his side table. It’s of him with a woman, both of them around the same age. Your heart sinks slightly, and you pick up the photo to get a closer look. You hope it’s his sister as you examine the image. Your eyes are drawn to Jeno first. You study him closely. His full lips, pretty eyes, and that charming mole under his eye have you under spells. 

Then your gaze shifts to the woman. She’s pretty. A twinge of jealousy flares in your chest, and you quickly look away, feeling suddenly self-conscious. You tell yourself you have no right to feel this way, but the emotion lingers stubbornly. Your mind creates all sorts of scenarios in your head as it tries to make sense of it all. Your eyes trail back to Jeno’s photo, and just as you wonder how long you’ve been staring, you hear the bathroom door open. Heart pounding, you hurriedly put the photo back where you found it. In your haste, you wake Hayan. He looks up at you with sleepy eyes and lets out a soft yawn.

Jeno walks into the room, laughing softly. “He’s still sleepy? This babysitting gig will be a breeze,” he jokes. He walks closer, crouching down to gently pet the sleeping puppy. “He must have been so tired,” Jeno murmurs, softly stroking Hayan in your lap.

He’s on his knees in front of you, and when he looks up, your eyes lock. His arms rest beside your thighs on the couch, boxing you in. The way his eyes shine as he gazes at you makes your breath catch. His hair is still damp from the shower, slightly dripping, and he smells like honey.

Your eyes drift to his lips. Full and tempting, just like in the photo. You take in each of his features, committing everything to memory. Without thinking, your hand reaches out, and your thumb brushes softly against the mole under his eye.  Your mind is in a haze and you don’t realize how close you’ve gotten. Suddenly you can feel his breath against your lips. Had he moved closer without you noticing? He licked his lips, and the way they shimmered with moisture made your breath hitch unexpectedly. The closer he got the slower time felt, almost like you were trapped in molasses. You felt a shy brush of his lips against yours. 

Hayan sneezes loudly, breaking the moment. He jumps down from your lap and trots off to find somewhere else to nap. Startled, you pull away from Jeno completely. You quickly readjust your position on the couch and avert your, focusing on anything but Jeno. Suddenly, you felt his hand take yours. He wasn’t going to let you run away this time. He carefully brought your fingertips to his lips, kissing each one softly while maintaining eye contact. He looked like he wanted to eat you alive.

You were short-circuiting. Was this real life? Your heart felt like it could leap out of your chest. Jeno noticed the stunned look on your face and held his gaze, a quiet smirk playing on his lips. He was glad you couldn’t look away. He rarely got the chance to see you this close and he was savoring every second of it. You were effortlessly beautiful and he couldn’t get you out of his head. 

He gave you a mischievous smile, one you hadn’t seen from him very often. Deciding to take mercy on you, he slowly stood to his full height and backed off. With a playful glint in his eyes he dropped the wet towel on your head. The dampness made you cringe, and you swiped it off, tossing it back at him. 

“You’re so gross,” you muttered, trying to hide your blush.

“Don’t be dramatic,” he rolled his eyes playfully. “I only used it on my hair.” He settled down next to you on the couch.

You gather your composure, trying your best to act normal. “How long is Hayan going to be here?” you ask nervously, fidgeting with your nails to distract yourself from everything that had just happened.

“Until Friday,” Jeno replies. “You can come over as much as you want. I wouldn’t mind the extra company. Plus it looks like he already likes you.”

A bright smile spreads across your face. “I’d love to help!”

He nods. “I get home around 6 on weekdays. You can come then, if that works.”

“What if I take care of him while you’re at work?”

Jeno pauses, considering it. “That sounds like a good idea, but I hate to get you wrapped up in my responsibilities.”

You shrug. “Well, I work from home and don’t do much all day, so I don’t mind,” you add, eager to sell the idea now that it’s been proposed.

Jeno nods thoughtfully. “I don’t see why not.” After a few beats of silence, a look of curiosity passes over his face. “You seem to really like animals. Why don’t you have any pets?”

“Well, for starters, I live in a pretty small apartment, and I don’t go outside enough to officially get a dog.” Your eyes widen. “But don’t worry, I’ll make sure I take Hayan out!” You reassure him even though he probably didn’t doubt you for a second.

“What about a cat?”

“Hm, I’d still feel bad keeping him cooped up inside all day,” you reply with a shrug.

Jeno grins. “Well, that’s okay. You’ve got me! I’ll be your pet,” he jokes.

Your face flushes, and Jeno smiles back. For a moment, you think he’s doing this on purpose. There’s no way he doesn’t know exactly what he’s doing to you.

Feeling a little bolder, you reach out and grab the collar of his shirt in revenge. “Gonna let me walk you too?” you tease, and for once, Jeno is the one caught off guard. His cheeks turn bright red, probably the reddest you’ve ever seen. Satisfaction bubbles up inside you, this was a small victory after the little stunt he pulled earlier.

You laugh softly, and a genuine smile begins to spread across Jeno’s face. A peaceful silence settles between you two for a moment before Jeno speaks again. His eyes search yours. “Do you ever get lonely?”

You pause, thinking deeply before answering. "I'm used to it," you admit, your voice low. "As you could guess, I don't have many real friends. The only other friends I have are online, so...I guess that counts, right?" You let out a small, hollow laugh. "I wish I was more outgoing, but I'm scared. I'm scared of meeting new people, and I'm terrible at socializing. It used to be lonely, but I've gotten used to it."

Jeno reaches out, his expression gentle. You feel a flutter in your chest as his hand brushes against yours. "You shouldn't be," he says softly.

You look down, a soft blush rising to your cheeks as you fidget with your hands. "It's not all bad, I guess," you say glancing up at Jeno. "And yeah, it means a lot that you're here and that you care. It's...it's a big deal for me."

“I’ll always be here.”

𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬

Jeno knocks on your door early the next morning, before work, and drops off Hayan along with everything you'll need to take care of him. Usually, you’re used to seeing Jeno in his casual clothes with his fluffy hair slightly tousled.  But today, he’s dressed sharply in a sleek black dress shirt tucked into tailored slacks and he has a heavy watch shining on his wrist. His hair is slicked back smoothly, with a few strands curled in softly on his forehead, giving him a charismatic look. 

He’s off to work, but there’s a lingering look in his eyes. You find yourself wishing you could keep him to yourself today, just a little longer. You feel like a doting wife sending her husband off to work, all that’s missing is him leaning in to kiss your cheek before he leaves.

“Have a good day at work,” you call out, watching him turn and head down the hall.

You take Hayan inside and you’re excited to not be alone all day for once. You spend hours taking calls for your job, playing with Hayan in between calls. During lunch, you pause to take Hayan for a walk and to get some fresh air. You capture a few funny videos on your phone, your favorite was of Hayan sitting by a flower bed and a butterfly landing on his nose. He freezes, eyes wide in wonder, before suddenly jumping up, making the butterfly flutter away. You couldn't wait to show Jeno later.

You were in such a great mood that later you decided to take Hayan to the local park. You had to work up the courage but once you saw Hayan having the time of his life it was worth it. 

As the evening settles in, Jeno arrives to pick up Hayan. He settles onto your couch, sleeves rolled up, shoes kicked off and hair a tousled mess. It was a stark contrast to his sharp, polished appearance from earlier that morning. He sits close, and you can smell the remainder of his cologne on him. You would drown in his scent if you could. 

You showed him the funny videos you had taken of Hayan. “He's so cute!” you laugh softly, your heart melting at the sight. “He’s a lot like you, you know.” You add.

Jeno gives you a smug look. "You think I'm cute?" he asks, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

You’d gotten a little used to his teasing, so you nudge him and roll your eyes. "Not in that way, dork."

Jeno looks playfully disappointed, then tilts his head in confusion. At that moment, you swear you've seen Hayan do the same thing. “Then, how so?” Jeno asks.

“Well, for starters, you kinda act alike,” you explain, reaching over to run your fingers through Jeno’s messy hair absentmindedly. Jeno leans into your touch without hesitation, closing his eyes briefly. “And you sort of look like him. I just can’t quite put my finger on it,” you finish.

Jeno tries to stifle a yawn. Your touch is so soothing, it feels like home. “You think so?” he asks groggily, resting his head on your shoulder.

“Yeah,” you whisper and rest your head against his.

The scene is picture perfect. Hayan is asleep comfortably on your lap and Jeno is resting  against your shoulder. In that moment, you realize just how lonely you’ve been. You don’t think you could go back to that cold emptiness.

𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬

Before, your days would blur together in a never-ending cycle of waking up, going to work, eating, and sleeping. You never realized how lonely it was until you met Jeno. Now, your days are filled with laughter, smiles, games, and a light you’ve never seen in the world before. The sky seems bluer and more vast, the air feels crisper as you breathe it in, and the sun shines brighter. Honestly, it scares you because it could all vanish in the blink of an eye. What if Jeno moves away? Or he gets a girlfriend and can’t spend time with you anymore? What if he only felt sorry for you all along, and you were just too foolish to see it?

You try not to think about it too much, your eyes drifting over the pile of puzzle pieces spread across Jeno’s floor. You had come over after work, and he surprised you with a new puzzle. He usually gives up on them pretty quickly but you loved putting them together. You had been working in silence, your brain deciding to think of fucked up scenarios to torment you. You nervously chew on your bottom lip to try to calm your nerves.

You hadn’t even noticed how tense you were until Jeno came over and kneeled beside you. You pull yourself out of your daze and look up at him. His thumb moved softly, tracing along your lips before he gently pulled your bottom lip free from between your teeth.

He massaged the flesh with his thumb for a moment, then slowly let go. “What’s wrong?”

You sat up and crossed your legs, you could see the worry etched into his expression. You licked your bottom lip and winced, your teeth had bitten into it too deep and split the skin.

“Sorry, it’s just a bad habit I have when I’m focusing,” you whisper.

“Liar,” Jeno says easily, sitting back on his hands. “You think I don’t know you.” There was no questioning in his voice, only certainty. “Something’s bothering you.”

Jeno’s eyes saw everything. They could spot every change in your expression and notice any shift in your behavior. Right now, you weren’t sure if that annoyed you or not. 

“I just really like spending time with you,” you say softly, your eyes drifting back to the pile of puzzle pieces as you continue fitting them together. “And sometimes, I get a little sad.”

“Why does that make you sad?” Jeno asks in confusion. 

You can’t bring yourself to meet his eye. “Because all good things eventually come to an end,” you whisper.

His voice is quiet when he speaks again. “Hey. Look at me.”

You stubbornly keep your focus on the puzzle. You’re afraid to meet his gaze because you know that if you do, your walls will come crashing down, and the tears you've been holding back will spill over.

“Y/N,” he repeats your name softly, as if it’s the most fragile thing in the world, like it’s made of glass. “Please.”

Taking a deep breath, you finally glance up at him. When your eyes meet, you see understanding and compassion. 

“You mean the world to me,” he says softly. “I enjoy spending every single day with you. I can’t imagine my life without you.”  The way he’s looking at you takes your breath away. For a moment, you believe maybe he could love you.

Your heart soars. It’s as if you could fly. Everything he just said matches how you feel about him, how you’ve felt all along. 

“You always know exactly what to say,” you say with a small smile.

“Of course,” Jeno says triumphantly, a proud smile spreading across his face. He’s happy he managed to bring your smile back to its rightful place. “You’re my best friend.”

It shouldn’t hurt when he says that, but it does. Obviously Jeno was your friend, that had been long established but for a second you believed he thought of you as more than that.  The smile on your face wavers just a little. But before Jeno can address it, Hayan suddenly bounds over and jumps onto your puzzle, sending pieces flying everywhere. Both you and Jeno startle, laughing at the chaos. You’re grateful for the distraction, and you’re glad the laugh that escapes is genuine because honestly, you didn’t want to think about the millions of pieces your heart just shattered into.

Once everything settles, and Jeno helps you clean up the puzzle, the room remains quiet. Hayan curls up contently in his dog bed, feeling satisfied after causing a little destruction. 

Jeno is the first to break the silence. “Are you hungry? I can make dinner,” he asks hopefully.

You love Jeno’s cooking, and you always enjoyed playing sous chef while he bustled around the kitchen. But tonight, you needed to be away from him, even if just for a little while. 

“No, I’m kind of tired already,” you lie. “I think I’m going to head back over to my place.”

Jeno’s face falls slightly, and he looks like a kicked puppy. The sight of it twists the knife in your chest even more, but you know if you stayed, things would only become more awkward.  

Jeno nods and walks you to the door. Just before you reach the threshold, he hesitates for a moment. “I forgot to ask but do you want to go to dinner on Friday? I’m inviting some friends, and I think it would be fun if you came.”

You hesitate to answer so Jeno offers you a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry. It’ll only be a few people, and you don’t have to stay the whole time if you don’t want to.

Let me sleep on it?” you ask.

He nods. “Let me know. I’d really love to see you there.”

𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬

The music was loud, and the place reeked of stale booze. The bar you were sitting at was sticky, and you were feeling beyond overstimulated. Where was Jeno during all this? You wish you could say you didn't know but your eyes kept drifting to him and you couldn’t look away. For the last thirty minutes you had watched him, he was dancing with the same girl who had his attention since dinner.

The night hadn’t started bad, Jeno had been right, the dinner was fun. You met a lot of his friends, and they were warm, welcoming and a little rambunctious, just as Jeno had described them in his stories. Jaemin, Renjun, Yuna, and Haechan sat around the dinner table, taking turns sharing embarrassing stories about Jeno. You thought it was cute how they teased Jeno. You had never seen him get so flustered. It was enjoyable, until Haechan suggested going bar hopping. Everyone seemed excited by the idea, and you didn’t want to be a downer. When Jeno shot you a hesitant look before answering, you gave him a confident nod. You’d learned over the past few months that sometimes, it was good to step out of your comfort zone. So you put on a brave face and gave it a try.

You all were about to split up in the parking lot, agreeing to meet at the closest bar, until a girl approached your group. After a quick introduction, you realize you have seen her before. She was the girl from the photo, the one Jeno had framed in his living room. Apparently she was one of his childhood friends. She quickly explains that she had been running late and missed dinner. She introduced herself as Sasha. You complimented her outfit and got to know her fairly quickly.  

She rode with you and Jeno to the bar, she had taken the passenger seat and left you sitting alone in the back. Jeno and Sasha laughed and rambled on without you. You wanted to join in and not feel so awkward, but they were talking about old memories, ones that you were obviously not a part of. You shrugged it off, telling yourself they were probably eager to catch up.

You finally arrive at the bar and walk beside Jeno. You’re about to reach out and take his hand to avoid getting separated inside when suddenly, someone rammed into you. You stumble to the side and you look up to see Sasha’s apologetic smile as she slips past you. She intertwines her fingers with Jeno’s, pulling him behind her with a confident air around her. Jeno’s eyes widen in surprise before he glances back at you in concern. His brow furrows as he quickly checks if you’re okay. You manage a small smile, offering a shrug and a fake nonchalance, pretending it didn’t bother you even as your chest tightens slightly.

Jeno’s other friends are kind enough to look out for you and offer to stick together inside the bar. Feeling a bit more grounded, you instinctively latch onto a girl named Yuna’s side for support and watch pathetically as Sasha drags Jeno into the crowded bar.

And that’s how you found yourself exactly where you were now.

“You're not going to ask him to dance?” Yuna says after ordering another shot at the bar.

“He seems pretty busy,” you reply sarcastically, rolling your eyes.

Yuna shakes her head with a knowing smile. “You know he’d drop everything to be next to you, right?” she says and you whip around to face her.

“If you’re just trying to make me feel better you don’t have to lie,” you huff, annoyed.

The bartender slides Yuna her shot, and she downs it in one gulp, making a face at the bitter taste before turning her attention back to you.

“Whatever. Sit and mope all you want,” she shrugs, then pushes off the bar and heads toward the dance floor.

You stare daggers at her back, then turn back to the drink you’d been nursing all night. Renjun catches your eye from further down the bar and gives you an apologetic smile as he approaches.  

“People tend to make that face after Yuna talks to them,” he says softly. “I’m usually the one who has to come and fix it. Please tell me she didn’t say anything rude?”

You shrug it off with a small smile. “No, nothing like that. She’s right. I can’t really fault her for it.” You meant it. Yuna was real and confident, she didn’t care if people couldn’t handle it. You admired that about her. You had talked to her a lot during the dinner and she was everything you weren’t. You wanted to be fierce like her someday. 

“From the look on your face, she probably told you to stop with the ‘kicked puppy’ act and go get what you want.”  Renjun chuckles and takes a sip of his drink.

Your cheeks flush with embarrassment. Did everyone know you had feelings for Jeno?

“Is it really that obvious?”

“Unfortunately, yes. But luckily, Jeno’s an idiot and probably hasn’t caught on,” Renjun says with a teasing smile.

Your eyes drift back to the way Jeno dances with Sasha. “They look perfect together.”

“If it’s Sasha you’re worried about, those two broke up a long time ago,” Renjun offers, trying to lift your spirits.

You shoot him a surprised look. “Wait, they dated?” If you didn’t feel like shit before, you definitely felt worse now.

It was obvious he still had feelings for her. The way he danced with her, the way he looked at her. He even still had a picture of them together in his living room. Watching them, you finally chugged the alcohol that had been resting between your palms all night.

Renjun shrugs. “Yeah, but it was a long time ago. They’re just friends now.”

“Well, she seems like she wants to be more than friends again,” you say, signaling to the bartender for another drink. When it arrives, you don’t hesitate, you down it quickly.

“You don’t have to be scared. What’s the worst that could happen if you confess? You know the saying that goes “It's better to have loved and lost than never to love at all’?” Renjun prompts, making you laugh bitterly.

“I can’t risk losing Jeno. I can’t ruin what we have. Besides, I’ll never be brave enough to confess,” you say.

Renjun shakes his head. “Well… then, think of it this way. Would you rather lose Jeno knowing you tried, or lose him to someone else without ever saying a word?” His eyes meet yours. “The choice is yours.”

You swirl the straw in your drink, letting his words sink in as you contemplate them.

“Those who love don’t let themselves be ruled by fear,” Renjun continues softly. “They know it’s scary, and they know it will hurt. But they find the courage to love anyway. You’re scared of getting hurt and that’s okay. Because courage is what comes after fear.”

“Then I guess I’m just a coward,” you say, your voice tinged with bitterness. “Fear’s what’s kept me safe all this time. I’m okay with being scared. I’m used to being alone, and I don’t really need love. I’ve gotten this far without it.”

“But are you really living?” Renjun asks.

You bristle at his words, and suddenly, your mind spirals. He was right, he saw right through you. You'd just been getting by, day by day, nothing more than surviving.

Food, water, and shelter. That’s all you needed to survive.

But love, that’s what you needed to truly live.

You take a long swig of your drink, hoping the burn of alcohol will distract you from the tears that burn behind your eyelids. 

You’ve never gotten this drunk before, and the way the liquor mixes with the chaos of your emotions feels dangerous. You stand from the bar, and Renjun’s hands shoot out to steady you, but you shrug him off.  

“I’m fine,” you insist.

“Maybe I should get Jeno to take you home,” he suggests cautiously.

At his words, your eyes drift back toward the dance floor. A part of you wants to believe Renjun and Yuna. Maybe Jeno could have feelings for you, but the more logical side doubts it.

In the end he’s dancing with her, not you.

You tell Renjun you’re headed to the bathroom, but the truth is, you’re leaving. You don’t know where you’re going, but you can’t be in this dingy bar a second longer.  

Without saying goodbye, you slip out and start walking down the street. It’s probably a forty-minute walk to your place, but the cold, fresh air offers you a strange solace, and the stars above provide silent companionship.

About fifteen minutes into your walk, your phone buzzed loudly in your pocket. You ignored it, sinking deeper into your thoughts and letting everything you’d been feeling toward Jeno over the past few months come bubbling to the surface. Love, then fear, then sadness. It was like a never ending cycle and it was exhausting.

You remembered what Renjun said at the bar and realized he was right. It was pathetic to keep living in fear like this. If you didn’t muster the courage to truly live, you’d just die alone.

You spot a park up ahead off to the side of the road. You had worn heels for the first time in a long time tonight and your feet were killing you. You steady yourself and carefully make your way across the wood chips, trying not to kick up any and get them caught in your heels. 

Finally, you reached the swings and sat down heavily. You were still heavily intoxicated and at first the quiet, rundown park offered a strange comfort. That was until you stared at the playground through your drunken haze, your mind began to distort things. Shadows seemed to hide inside the tunnel slide, ghosts haunted the swingset, and worse, you imagined a killer lurking in the woods behind you.

The longer you sit outside in the middle of the night, the more you regret the idea of walking home. A fresh wave of tears wash over you. You were drunk and alone, and you hadn’t realized how cold it had gotten. The alcohol had kept you warm, but now as the buzz faded, the chill of the night seeped into your bones making you shiver.

You reach into your pocket to grab your phone, but before you can dial Jeno’s number, you're blinded by the headlights of a car. You raise your arm to shield your eyes, squinting through the glare as the car door finally swings open. A figure steps out, and you strain your eyes to discern who it is.  

Are you out of your mind?!” a voice yells out.  

You recognize it as Jeno’s, but the tone is unfamiliar. His tone is sharp and almost angry. For as long as you’ve known him, he’s never raised his voice at you like that before. You hear the wood chips crunch under his feet as he storms toward you, grabbing your forearm and yanking you up from the swing set. You stumble to your feet, caught off guard. 

He does a quick once over of your body from head to toe, searching for any cuts or bruises. When he seems satisfied that you’re unharmed, his shoulders sag in relief. He takes a deep breath, closes his eyes briefly, then reopens them but his expression is still tense.  

“What do you think you’re doing?” he asks. You could hear the strain in his voice as he tried to stay calm.  

“I was going home,” you respond as if it were obvious. What little alcohol is still in your system makes you unusually fearless. Is this how Yuna feels all the time?

He leans in, inhaling sharply, and smells your breath. “You’re drunk.” he states, disbelief evident.  

You shrug off his grip on your forearm and glare at him. “Of course I’m drunk, Jeno! You took me to a bar! What was I supposed to do?”  

“If you were ready to go home, you should have come to get me,” he snaps, frustration bubbling up.

“And what? Interrupt all the fun you were having? Don’t act like you’re so concerned about me now!”  

“Do you have any idea what could have happened to you? Do you think this is a game? You don’t just wander off like that!”  

“Stop acting like you care! All night has just been you and Sasha. You haven’t said a word to me since we entered the bar!” 

You’re in each other’s faces at this point, and you never thought it would be possible to be this angry with Jeno.

Jeno runs his hands down his face, sighing heavily. “I’m not having this conversation right now. It’s cold, and I need to get you home,” he says exhausted. 

“No! I’m not going with you,” you reply stubbornly, standing your ground.  

You don’t know why you’re acting this way. You were just about to call him before he showed up, but now that he’s here, all the feelings you thought you had under control start to surge to the surface. You couldn’t bear to be near him anymore. You start marching away from the park and head back toward the main road. You were determined to put as much distance as possible between you and everything else

You hear the sound of the passenger car door opening and the last voice you wanted to hear tonight speaks.  

“Where is she going?” Sasha called out.

“Just get back in the car,” Jeno responds, voice tense, as he begins to stalk after you.

Now, you’re mad and embarrassed. Sasha just saw you having a yelling match with Jeno after acting like a wet rag all night. She’s probably happy you’re jealous. The gravel crunches beneath his footsteps as he walks after you, calling your name. You hear Sasha call out again, equally frustrated.

“Y/N, come on! This isn’t funny. What’s your deal?” Sasha barks from her spot next to the car.

“I said wait in the car!” Jeno yells behind you.

You don’t dare look back. Stubbornly, you keep walking, your high heels clacking unsteadily against the narrow shoulder of the road. Cars pass too close for comfort and  their headlights are almost blinding but you don’t care. You’re being reckless but your feet refuse to stop. The embarrassment weighs heavy on your chest, and you’re too humiliated to face Jeno right now.

“No! She’s so annoying. It’s too cold for this,” Sasha mutters from behind in frustration.

You roll your eyes at her words, ignoring the sting they carry.  

Jeno calls out to you again, voice pleading. “Y/N, wait!”  

“Jeno, leave me al—” Suddenly, your knee buckles beneath you and the heel of your shoe snaps with a sharp crack. You try to catch your balance, but you’re a stumbling mess. You fall sideways, tumbling down the ditch beside the road.  

You squeeze your eyes shut tight as you feel yourself rolling down the slope while mud and leaves scrape against your skin. Your body hits the bottom with a dull thud, and everything blurs together. All you could feel was the cold, the dirt, and the sting of pain.  

Above you, muffled curses and hurried footsteps grow louder. Jeno and Sasha rush over, their faces etched with concern.  

“Shit,” Jeno mutters, voice tight.  

“Are you okay?” Sasha asks, her tone a little softer now.

You struggle to get to your feet, but you wince as pain shoots through your ankle.  

“I—I don’t think I can get out on my own,” you admit guiltily, bitterness choking your voice. You berate yourself silently. How stupid, how reckless. Now you’re stuck in this ditch, needing help from Sasha and Jeno to get back up.  

The ditch is deep, with a steep slope that, under normal circumstances, you could have managed to run up. But with your injury, it’s impossible. You watch Sasha unlatch her heels and kick them off with a faint glare.  

“Don’t look at me like that,” she snaps, eyes narrowing. “I may not like you all that much, but I’m not a bitch.”  

Without hesitation, Sasha and Jeno make their way down the hill bickering all the while helping you up. You lean heavily on both of them, one arm around Sasha, the other around Jeno. You finally manage to stand and look between their faces. Sasha's jaw was tense, while Jeno's eyes showed concern.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper, voice trembling. “I should have listened.” Your voice trails off in shame. 

Jeno’s eyes soften, and he shakes his head slowly. “Save it. It was an accident.”  

Sasha remained silent for a moment before she clears her throat. She speaks quietly but firmly. 

“I know I’ve been harsh, but that doesn’t mean I want to see you get hurt. You’re not stupid you’re just drunk and tired. I’ve been there and I've seen Jeno do worse so don't beat yourself up.” Her voice isn’t cold anymore, it's just honest. 

Jeno looks over at her with a small, proud smile. She offers a small smile, but before it can fully develop, it's replaced by her usual guarded expression.  

Once you're back on the pavement, Jeno lifts you into his arms, carrying you bridal style. You instinctively rest your head against his chest, feeling safe in his strong hold. Sasha walks ahead, rubbing her arms for warmth. She was eager to reach the car and escape the cold.

“Are you jealous?” Jeno asks, breaking the silence. His voice is sincere and almost curious. “Is that what this is about? You’re jealous of Sasha?”

You glance away, voice small and uncertain. “I’m not jealous,” you mumble, feeling exposed.

Jeno chuckles softly, "You can't hide it from me. I know you, remember? I know you can't look people in the eye when you lie, and you can't hold your liquor to save your life." He pauses, then adds, "And I know you think I have feelings for Sasha, but you're wrong."

“Then why dance with her all night long? Why ignore me?” Your voice grows stronger, laced with hurt.

"We were just catching up. I didn't mean to leave you alone, especially after I invited you. I'm sorry."

“You know how I feel tho… I was out of my element and you left me alone,” your voice waivers.

Jeno’s face softens. “I’m really sorry.”

 Suddenly, Sasha’s voice interrupts, echoing down the road, “Can we go now?!” Sasha yells impatiently, before rolling up the window and sinking back into the seat.

Jeno laughs fondly, "Sasha's not so bad once you get to know her. She's like a sister to me.”

You raise an eyebrow, "So you dated your sister?" You were too drunk to worry about the fact that technically, you weren’t supposed to know that.

Jeno rolls his eyes, "It's not like that. We didn't date long because our dynamic wasn't suited for a relationship. She's harmless if you give her a chance. I was actually telling her about you."

Your heart warms at his words. "I feel like such a brat," you say, covering your face in embarrassment.

Jeno teases, "You are, but it's cute. I've never seen this side of you."

You groan, knowing he won't let you live it down. Summoning the rest of  your courage, you speak, "Thank you for being there for me. I'm sorry for getting jealous and causing a scene." You finish by placing a gentle kiss on his cheek.

Jeno stops walking and cups your cheek before you can fully pull away. He seals your apology with a soft kiss. You wrap your arms around his neck, deepening the kiss. When you pull away, you're breathless and he kisses your nose and resumes walking.

When you get in the car, Sasha doesn’t say anything, just mutters a “Finally” under her breath and blasts the heater as Jeno starts the engine. The ride is surprisingly pleasant, Sasha sings along to the songs on the radio and encourages you to join in. You breathe a little easier now that she isn’t sending icy glares through the rearview mirror. You're still not entirely sure how you feel about her, but you're glad whatever beef she had with you has been squashed.

At your apartment door, Jeno hesitates before speaking.

“I'm sorry for yelling at you earlier. I don’t usually get that worked up, but I really thought something had happened to you,” he says.

“No, I’m sorry, Jeno. I shouldn’t have left. That was dangerous, and I wasn’t thinking. I feel like I ruined the night,” you reply, your voice tinged with regret.

Jeno closes the distance between you in two long strides and wraps his arms around you. “You didn’t ruin anything. I’m just glad you’re okay. Truce?”

You nod and hug him tighter, and he kisses the top of your head.

You pull away, your gaze dropping to your muddy clothes. "Shit, I'm sorry," you mutter, scanning Jeno's shirt for any dirt you might have transferred. His once clean shirt now smudged with dirt and you grimace at the sight.

Jeno chuckles, grasps the hem of his shirt, and with a swift motion he pulls it over his head. You’re too stunned to speak. Your eyes rake over his toned body, his abdominal muscles ripple like waves and a deep V-line draws your eye down to the waistband of his jeans. You swallow hard, feeling your cheeks flush with warmth.

He tilts your chin up and offers a smirk. The expression on his face is a challenge, daring you to make the first move. "Do you want me to help clean you up, or would you rather I go?" His voice is a soft rumble that sends shivers down your spine.

You can't find your voice, so you act. You strip off your muddy clothes until you stand before him in just your underwear. It was the most vulnerable you have ever been with Jeno, but you trust him. His gaze rakes over you, setting your skin ablaze. Both of you seeing a new side of each other, and neither of you could get enough.

He leads you into the bathroom, turning the shower on as steam begins to fill the room. He lifts you onto the counter before positioning himself between your legs. Your heart pounds in your chest as he carefully helps pick all the leaves and sticks from your hair, being gentle to avoid making it even more tangled than it already is. Once he's done, you hop down and stand before him, unsure of what to do next. Jeno decides to take the lead and he watches you with a lazy smile as he reaches for his belt. You can't help but stare at his hands. They are thick, manly, and veined. Your mind races, imagining those hands wrapped around your neck. Jeno likes the way you look at him, his smile turning cocky. He then slides down his jeans, revealing his muscular thighs and the prominent outline of his erection straining against his briefs. You lick your lips, your mouth suddenly dry.

He leans in, his voice barely a whisper over the roar of the shower, "Help me, yeah?"

You step closer, your fingers trembling as you hook them into the waistband of his briefs. He notices your shaking hands and bends down to look you in the eyes. "Hey, we can stop if you want. I can shower at my place, you know that, right?" Jeno would never pressure you into something you weren’t ready for and you appreciate him for taking the time to check in on you.

You shake your head, you were beyond horny at this point. "No, please. I need this. I need you."

He sends you a smile, a slow, sexy curve of his lips that drives you crazy. Then he nods, motioning for you to continue.

You pull his briefs down, and his cock springs free, slapping against his abdomen. You gasp, your eyes wide as you take in his size. He's thick and the head of his cock is pink and weeping. It was like a ripe, juicy fruit and you can't help the way your tongue darts out to lick your lips as you imagine tasting him.

Jeno tilts his head with a cocky smirk. "Your turn, princess. No more hiding."

You take a deep breath, unclipping your bra. It falls away, revealing your breasts to him. You shimmy out of your panties, adding them to the growing pile of clothing on the floor. You stand tall, your shoulders back, and your chin high. Your heart pounds in your chest as you do your best to appear as confident as Jeno.

You watch his eyes glaze over in lust. ““Come here,” he says softly before guiding you into the shower.

You step into the shower and Jeno's eyes never leave yours. He turns the showerhead, letting the water cascade down your body and  washing away the rest of the mud on your skin. You shiver under the intensity of his gaze.

He reaches for the shampoo and his fingers massage your scalp as he works the product into your hair. You close your eyes and your body relaxes under his touch. Once he's done, he rinses your hair.

He grabs the soap and lathers it up in his hands. He starts at your chest and his soapy hands glide over your skin making your breath hitch. Then he cups your breasts, his thumbs circling your nipples until they grow hard. He pinches them and the sensation is new and unexpected, causing you to jump slightly and take a step back. He doesn’t let up though, he follows, pressing you against the cold tile wall so that he can explore your body. His hands roam down your sides, over your waist, until they reach your hips. He massages the skin there, continuously lathering you in soap before he reaches around and grabs the flesh of your ass. You gasp, your eyes fluttering closed as he leans in and  captures your mouth in a searing kiss.

His tongue dips into your mouth and explores every inch of it. Your tongues dance, your teeth clash, and your breaths mingle. You grab onto his shoulders, your nails digging into his skin as you pull him closer, deepening the kiss. You want him, all of him. You want to know him in ways you never have before.

Your hands slide down his chest and over his abs until they reach his cock. You wrap your hand around it and run your thumb along the rigid veins. He freezes, his mouth agape and his breath hitches. You tighten your grip, stroking him slowly, your hand slick with water and soap.

You remember all the years worth of fanfics, sex articles, and porn you’ve consumed and you use that knowledge to guide you on what to do next. You had read that guys like a tight grip, so you grip him hard enough for him to really feel it. You twist your wrist as you stroke him and tease the sensitive head of his cock before gliding back down to the base. You watch as the water rains down on him, his hair plastered to his forehead and droplets rolling down his abs. You feel a sense of empowerment, knowing that you're the one driving him to the edge.

Jeno lets out a shaky moan, his brows furrowing as he hides his face in your shoulder. "Fuck, who taught you this?" he asks, genuinely puzzled. He'd assumed you were a virgin, but the way you touched him was anything but innocent.

You feel emboldened by his reaction and lean in to purr in his ear. "Shh, just take it. You deserve it." You can feel his body trembling, his grip on your hips turning bruising as you increase the pace, you add your other hand and they work in tandem to drive him closer to the edge.

He leans into you, his breath coming in ragged gasps. His hips thrust forward, meeting your strokes. You can feel his body tensing, his orgasm building. He lets out a guttural moan before he grips your wrist tight.

Suddenly, he pulls away, taking a clumsy step back. "Wait," he says, his voice rough. "Turn around."

Your stomach clenches in excitement. The look in his eyes promises that you're in for something special. You do as he says and turn to face the wall. You expect to feel his cock, but instead, you feel his warm wet tongue against your folds. He hums at the taste and sucks eagerly at your clit. He needs you ready and wet enough to take him. He slips two thick fingers inside you, stretching you out for him. You can feel your juices dripping down your thighs and your breath comes in short gasps.

Once he has your juices dripping down his face, he finally stands. Leaning over you, he runs the head of his cock along your slit. "You're so fucking wet," he growls. "You have no idea what you do to me, baby. I've jacked off thinking about you, imagining you coming to my door, begging me to eat your pussy." He leans in closer, his voice dropping to a low whisper. "But now, I’m all yours. Whenever you want me, you can have me."

You whimper, your hips wiggling impatiently. You reach back, grabbing his cock, guiding it to your entrance. Testing the waters you dip the fat head of his cock into your cunt again and again until you can't take it anymore.

“All you have to do is ask, baby. Say it.” He grits out as his hand comes up to lightly grip your throat.

"Fuck me," you pant, your voice barely a whisper.

You gasp as Jeno presses his hips forward, stretching you open. It's a new sensation, and your initial instinct is to pull away. You rise onto your tiptoes, but Jeno's grip on your neck tightens, holding you in place. "Stay right there," he breathes, his voice ragged with desire. "Right there…" 

He pushes in deeper, and you can feel every inch of him as he fills you completely. You take a moment to adjust, your body throbbing and pulsing around him. When you start to move back against him, he takes it as a sign to begin thrusting.

He starts slow and shallow, testing the rhythm. "How do you want it?"

"Deeper," you whisper, your voice barely audible over the sound of the shower. "Faster."

He obliges, his grip on your hips tightening as he picks up the pace. The sound of skin slapping against skin echoes through the bathroom, drowning out the sound of the shower. He uses his hold on you to move you up and down on his cock, fucking you against him with powerful snaps of his hips.

"You feel so good," he pants, his voice laced with praise. "You're taking it like a champ, baby. You're so fucking wet."

You were delirious and drunk off his words, you wanted more. You can feel your orgasm building and your legs tremble, but you don't want him to stop. "Harder," you beg, your voice barely a whisper. "Fuck me harder."

He growls, his hips moving like a piston as he rams into you., The hand around your neck moves down, his fingers finding your clit, rubbing harsh circles that send you spiraling over the edge.

Your climax hits you like a tidal wave and your body convulses as you scream his name but Jeno doesn't stop. He fucks you through your orgasm, his body tense as he chases his own release. "I'm so close, hold on for me," he grunts. "Make me proud, take it."

You're a whimpering mess in his arms, your legs shaking as he finally pulls out, painting your back with his cum. He strokes himself, ensuring he's spilled every last drop.

Your legs give out and you sink down onto the shower floor. Jeno bends down to your level. "You okay?" he asks.

You laugh weakly, shaking your head. "I'm more than okay," you say. "How are you... not even a little out of breath?"

He chuckles, leaning down to press a soft kiss to your lips. "I don't go to the gym for nothing," he says, his voice laced with pride. "Now come on, let me run you a bath." He helps you to your feet, his arm wrapped around your waist, steadying you as you step out of the shower.

𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬 𓅭 𓅮 𓅯𓅰 𓅬

While cleaning around your house, you notice a small piece of paper slipped under your door. Your heart skips a beat as you see the handwritten message:

Meet me on the roof at 9

One of the main amenities you moved into this apartment for was the rooftop lounge. It’s a quiet, tucked away spot with a view of the city skyline. You start getting ready around 8, choosing an outfit that’s cute yet casual since you weren't sure of the exact occasion. You hesitate for a moment in front of the mirror, nerves fluttering in your stomach. You take a final glance over your outfit to make sure you feel confident then head out the door toward the rooftop. When you step outside the cool night air brushes against your skin.

The space isn’t often used, but tonight, it’s transformed. Twinkling fairy lights and lanterns are draped over railings and in the center stands a small, round table covered with a white cloth and a tiny vase holding a single red rose. A soft melody filled the space as a small speaker played a mellow playlist, setting the mood. It’s a cheesy setup but that makes you love it even more.

Jeno is already waiting at the table, leaning slightly forward with a gentle smile. His eyes light up when he sees you, and he stands to greet you.

He’s dressed in a simple white button down shirt and slacks. It's laid-back but with a touch of formality, which makes you feel a little insecure about the outfit you picked.

"You look amazing," Jeno says softly, and any doubts you had wash away in an instant.

Your cheeks heat, and you can’t help but smile. "What did you want to talk about?" your voice is a little tentative.

“I know you’ve been avoiding me,” he says softly, taking a step towards you. His voice is gentle but steady. “And I know you’re afraid to let your walls down, but I promise I won’t hurt you if you let me in.”

His words hang in the cool night air as you think of a way to explain yourself. It’s true, you had been distant lately, unsure of what your relationship really was. You hadn’t talked about labels yet so you weren’t sure where you stood. 

He takes another slow, deliberate step toward you and reaches out to clasp your hand in his. His touch is warm and reassuring. He guides you toward the small, romantic table he’s set up.

As you walk, your eyes are drawn upward. The sky above is a deep blue, speckled faintly with stars struggling to shine through the city’s smog. When you reach the table, you notice a small insulated bag resting beside it. Jeno reaches inside, pulling out plates wrapped in plastic, their steam still rising, trapping the warmth inside. The faint scent of herbs and spices drifts up as he unwraps them, revealing beautifully prepared dishes.

He sets the plates down carefully, placing silverware and a single wine glass in front of you. From his seemingly endless “magic sack,” he retrieves a bottle of wine and he uncorks it. He pours a generous glass for you before doing the same for himself.

You wait until he’s finished, then raise your glass. The two of you sip the wine and the velvety flavor coats your tongue, and you hum softly in content. You offer him a small, thankful smile.

“I’ve been saving this for a special day,” Jeno says happily, his eyes shining. He digs into his food, nodding encouragingly at you to try yours.

You happily take a bite, the flavors bursting in your mouth. You were grateful you had an excuse to remain silent, you were still trying to find the right words. 

“Just relax,” he chuckles softly, breaking the quiet with a gentle laugh.

You hate how attuned he is to you, how he can read your mood with such ease. Sometimes it feels like he’s known you forever.

Swallowing the lump in your throat, you whisper, “I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything,” he replies softly. “We’re fine. We’ve always been fine. Let’s start from here. I’m not looking for an apology. I just missed you. I just want you here with me.”

Your stomach tightens with emotion, and even though you’ve already swallowed your food, the lump in your throat won’t go away. “I’m here. I’ll always be here,” you whisper back.

He offers you a warm, reassuring smile, one that seems to say everything you need to hear. Leaning across the table, he gently wipes away the tears you didn’t realize were falling, his thumb brushing softly against your cheek.

You don’t need him to say the words because he’s already shown you how he feels. His care is evident in every gesture, in the way he listens, in the gentle way he looks at you. He’s never too direct, and you appreciate that. Sometimes you think he’s afraid that being too honest might scare you away. 

Thank you Jeno, for always being the brave one, but I think it's my turn

You take a deep breath and meet his gaze directly. “I love you.” The words come out confident, steady, and unwavering. You don’t dare look away.

Jeno’s face lights up with the biggest smile. “I thought I might never hear those words,” he says.

[gyeomsweetgyeom]

[11:33 am]

(cw: pregnant!reader, nausea and mentions of throwing up)

Pregnancy had not been kind to you. You were tired all the time, and no amount of sleep you got was ever enough. You cramped horrendously, the sharp pains even you rousing you from your sleep or leaving a dreaded phantom throbbing feeling in the pit of your stomach. And gee, when you weren't sleeping or hunched over in pain, you were constantly peeing. Even when your water intake was low, you were constantly scurrying to the bathroom to empty your bladder.

Thankfully, you had no morning sickness. At least that's what you thought for the first five weeks you'd known about your pregnancy. Now, freshly into week 9 of 40 weeks of pregnancy, some sort or nausea had hit. You had an aversion to things, scents specifically, you'd never thought twice about before.

You'd had to throw out your body wash for being too minty, change your laundry detergent for being too sweet, and open up all the windows when you cooked eggs. Through lots of calculated breathing through your mouth and countless ginger candies, you managed. There was no other option.

Jeno had been great through it all. He went through the changes in recipes and soaps without complaint. He gave you massages when you cramped and kept your ginger candies stocked up. These were all changes that were fixed easily and you really hoped that the last few weeks of your first trimester would be smoother sailing.

You were laid out on the couch, snacking on grapes while you watched TV. Just the thought of standing up to do anything made you feel sick. In the midst of an emergency in the medical drama you were watching, the front door opened and in waltzed in the love of your life fresh from the gym.

"Hello, my love," he greeted, bending over the back of the couch to press a kiss to your temple.

You accepted it gratefully, humming lovingly before freezing. Usually, you love it when Jeno comes home from the gym. His muscles are bigger, his adrenaline was pumping, gee, if you wanted to know how you ended up in the first place...

Today, was out of the usual. Instead of enjoying his manly musk, your stomach lurched. You jumped away from him as you sat up, "oh my god. You have to get away from me."

"Huh?" He mumbles out, stepping around the couch to get a better look at you, "are you feeling alright? You didn't make eggs again, did you?"

Instead of answering, you cup one hand over your mouth with another clutches at your stomach while you race down the familiar path to the bathroom.

Your hands grip the sides of the ceramic toilet bowl until your bones hurt, but you can hardly focus on the pain as you empty out the contents of your stomach.

"Is this like afternoon sickness? Does it still count as morning?" Jeno asks, no doubt trying to keep your mind off being sick with his stupid question as he holds your hair back.

You breath heavily in the short reprieve of emptying your stomach, "don't be cute, right now!"

He rubs a hand on your back, grimacing as your retching echoes through the small bathroom, "I'm sorry, my love. I wonder what we need to change this time."

You pant, shakily reaching up to flush the toilet while resting your forehead against the cool side of the toilet bowl. "It's you," you say while slowly turning your head to glare at your husband, "you smell like a lawnmower and a wet dog from a junkyard had a baby."

Jeno's mouth opens and closes with confusion before his brows furrow as he replies, "I thought you liked how I smelled after the gym."

You catch another whiff and curl forward again with a loud gag and tears in your eyes, "your spawn doesn't!"

Jeno knows better than to let you hear him laugh, so he covers his mouth with the palm of his hand before the sound can escape. You heave into the bowl, spitting out a mouthful of saliva before fixing him with another, much colder glare, "don't talk to me again until you smell like you know basic hygiene practices."

He nods his head silently, backing out of the room quickly. The sound of your voice yelling, "wash twice and use deodorant!" just make him smile even brighter. He's so in love with you.

[mightyjo]

SORRY? - lee jeno

genre : fluff, comfort, romance, sulky!jeno, boyfriend!jeno × girlfriend!reader, jeno × reader

summary : you've been too caught up with studying that you neglect your one and only awesome boyfriend, jeno.

inspired by : To All The Boys I've Loved Before's hot tub scene <3

warning(s) : #notproofread, some curse words here and there (^-^)

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ .

you are on your last day of exams before christmas break, and you’ve been so caught up with studying and finishing all your assignments just so they wouldn’t burden you later—clearly neglecting your boyfriend, jeno.

which you didn’t even realize.

you guys haven’t talked for two days straight, and since he wasn’t texting or talking to you first, you assumed he also wanted to focus on studying for exams.

but you were wrong.

finally, the last exam of the semester is done! you’ve given your all, and honestly—you don’t give a shit anymore whether you get good grades or not. you’re already too stressed to even care about your school’s bullshit.

you’re definitely ready to enjoy some healing and relaxation time.

just the thought sleep makes your mood better.

well, you and your friends have been planning this villa trip together. and the ones coming are minjeong, ningning, aeri, jimin, hyuck, renjun, jaemin, jeno, and you.

the crew is set, and you guys are ready to go.

you guys decided to rent a van, leaving at noon so you'd arrive at the villa in the evening.

you sat next to jeno the whole ride, but he was very quiet, not talking to you at all. he had his airpods on and was reading a novel he borrowed from you a week ago, so you left him alone, happy enough that he was actually reading something you recommended to him.

you’re honestly so terrible at reading jeno’s mood, especially when he's angry/sulking, cause he’s not the type to show those kinds of emotions blatantly. so you don't actually know if something is bothering him.

you ended up sleeping the entire car ride, not realizing your head was resting on jeno’s shoulder the whole time. he stayed completely still, letting you rest on him because he knew how tired you were.

once you arrived, jeno gently woke you up.

“y/n, we’ve arrived. the others already went in,” he said, softly caressing your cheek.

“hmm? we’re here?” you mumbled, voice raspy, still half asleep.

“mhm.”

seeing how cute you looked, jeno couldn’t help but press a small kiss to your cheek.

“m’kay…”

you both got out of the car and brought your bags inside. everyone had already picked their rooms—the girls shared one, and the guys shared another.

after unpacking, jaemin, renjun, and hyuck were busy playing games.

you thought jeno was with them too, but he was nowhere to be found.

“hyuck, have you seen jeno?” you asked.

“JAEM—THERE’S SOMEONE ON MY LEFT! DEFEND ME, FOR GOD’S SAKE—what?” hyuck yelled before turning to you.

“have any of you seen jeno? he’s nowhere to be found.”

“haven’t seen him since we unpacked,” jaemin said, shrugging.

“same,” hyuck added.

“i think he went outside to swim? i saw him wearing his swimming trunks,” renjun said.

“okay, thanks, guys. good luck i guess?”

“yeah, yeah—good luck finding jeno,” jaemin teased.

you immediately went outside, confused about why jeno would swim in the middle of the night.

then—it hit you. how he was very quiet in the car on the way over here. and you just realized how much you’d been neglecting him these past few days.

you start looking for him.

you checked the pool.

he wasn’t there.

you tried calling him, no answer.

then you remembered seeing a hot tub earlier while bringing your suitcase in.

maybe he’s there.

so you went to check.

and he was.

sitting alone.

staring into nothing as the cold wind brushed past him.

guilt washed over you instantly.

he was definitely sulking in the car earlier—that’s why he had his airpods in and didn’t talk to you.

you slowly approached him.

as you got closer, jeno noticed you—but didn’t say anything. he just stared.

“jeno?”

“hm?” he replied, raising an eyebrow.

“are you mad at me..?” you asked softly.

“nope. definitely not mad at the way you ignored me for the past week,” he said, still clearly sulking.

“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to neglect you. you know how overwhelmed I get with exams and assignments…”

jeno stayed silent.

not saying a single word.

so you decided to join him.

you stepped into the hot tub, the warmth contrasting the cold air, and moved closer until you were standing right in front of him.

“wait… I’m really sorry, jeno. I shouldn’t expect you to always understand me—it’s not fair of me to be that selfish…”

you leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his lips.

he pulled back slightly, raising an eyebrow.

“you think a kiss will melt me away?”

“…maybe?”

“come here, you,” he muttered, pulling you into his lap and wrapping his arms around you.

“don’t ever ignore me like that.”

you blinked, surprised by how soft his voice sounded now.

“I won’t,” you whispered. “I promise.”

jeno studied your face for a moment, making sure you meant it. then his grip tightened slightly around your waist, pulling you closer.

“you better not,” he murmured.

you smiled a little. “what, you’re gonna sulk like this again?”

“I’ll do worse,” he said, narrowing his eyes playfully.

you laughed softly, resting your hands on his shoulders.

“scary.”

“yeah?” he hummed, leaning closer. “you didn’t seem that scared just now.”

your cheeks warmed.

he gently tilted your chin up.

“trying to fix everything with one kiss…” he murmured.

“…did it work?” you asked.

jeno paused.

then a small smile appeared.

“…maybe.”

this time, he leaned in first.

the kiss was slow. soft. warm.

like he’d been holding it in for days.

when he pulled away, his forehead rested against yours, his thumb tracing small circles on your waist.

“…I really did miss you,” he admitted.

your heart softened.

“I missed you more.”

he scoffed lightly. “not possible.”

“it is.”

“prove it.”

you grinned, wrapping your arms around his neck and hugging him tighter.

“I’m literally right here.”

jeno chuckled softly, burying his face in your neck before holding you closer.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ .

i know it's very cruel of me to post this a couple of day's after mark's departure from sm and all nct units, but this jeno drabble has been sitting in my draft for so longgggg, so i decided to post it.

wishing mark nothing but the best moving forward. i truly hope this decision brings him happiness and comes from a place that feels right for him. <3

thank you guys for reading this, and I hope you all enjoyed it !

[bridgertonletsgo]

Get Pucked (It’s the Prequel, Baby)!

“I’m tinkering with the idea of murder.”

Pairing -> Ice Hockey Player!Lee Jeno x Justrecoveredfromaconcussion!Female Reader.

Genre -> Fake dating. Fluff. Smut.

Word Count -> 33k

Synopsis -> Lee Jeno was a simple person: show up to class, show up to practice, and commit to them. Simple and easy; which was why Jeno never involved himself in relationships. Situationship, late-night hookups? Sure. Relationships were too complicated for his taste so he became infamous for rejecting people with their romantic pursuits. With that aside, one stupid thing he allowed himself to indulge in was bets. Stupid bets. Some were low stakes, some were high stakes, nevertheless bets. So when his friend, Chenle, challenged him to be in a relationship with one person for three months, a low risk bet with a high reward where if Jeno succeeds, Chenle owes him money, but if Jeno fails, Chenle gets Jeno's precious motorbike (Chenle doesn't even have a license!), Jeno simply couldn't refuse such an easy challenge. Whether by sheer luck or not, you were the victim of this subject - the girl he accidentally pucked who ended up in the hospital with a concussion. So, he asked you out, however, the guilt ate him like a parasite and he confessed the truth to you on your date. You, on the other hand, weren't mad that your secret crush of many years, Jeno, asked you out because of a dumb bet and not because he actually liked you, instead, you proposed to fake date each other and split the prize money between the two of you. Jeno agreed to it and had only one condition from him - don't fall in love with him. 

Disclaimer -> don’t read this if you hate cliches 😔! one bed trope, motorcyclist Jeno hehe, mentions of murder, stalking, and suicide (not graphic or explicit at all), riding, mirror sex, slight degradation, vibrator, blowjob.

Author’s Note:- A prequel to this and this. All these three one shots can be read as a stand-alone so you don’t have to read the others if you don’t want to. If you want to read all three, you can read the linked stories above first, since it was released first, and then read the prequel. Or, you can start off with this one aka in chronological order. FYI, Chenle appears in both How to Get Your Boyfriend to Breakup with You 101 and this one but he is not the same Zhong Chenle - they are doppelgängers! Same name, same face but two individuals who lead separate lives! Enjoy hehe <3 ao3 ver if u prefer to read it over there instead!

You know how they say your mind replays your whole life in seven seconds right before you die?

Well, yours replayed the most recent event that led up to that moment.

Lee Jeno flew through the ice rink from one end to the other as he dodged the opponent team with only one goal in mind - the perfect last puck of the game to break the tie. The crowd, including you, watched in anticipation with every glide of the crisp blade that skirted around the icy arena. Jeno's movements were too captivating to take your eyes off him, not just because he was your crush, but because he was a star player for a reason with those swift and skilled movements of his! Your bladder was reaching its limits but the game was almost over so you stayed to watch to the very end. This was it! He was near the goal and there was a small opening in the top right corner of the goalpost if he could accurately hit his shot. All the spectators held their breath as the match counted down to the last few seconds of the game, Jeno paused for a millisecond before he whacked the puck with his stick ; the puck flew off the icy ground, into the air, into the direction of the goal net, but it bounced off the metal post, over the barrier, and smacked you right on the side of your forehead. Knocked out.

Your only last thoughts before your vision faded into total darkness were, please don't let me pee my pants.

   "Wanna go to the game?" Your friend asked. The last time you went to an ice hockey game, you ended up in the hospital with a raging concussion to the point you had to take the rest of the semester off to recover. So safe to say, you weren't keen on going to another ice hockey game in your life. Ever. Even if your crush was the star player of the team. Now you were back on campus, fully healed and ready to take on the new semester and whatever may come your way.

"Not in this lifetime ever again." You chatted while everyone in the classroom waited for the lecturer to begin the class.

"I totally forgot about that!" Your friend gasped in guilt. "Sorry."

"It's fine," you chuckled at her. "Cute charm." You loved how the small charms decorated her hand and dangled off her wrist.

"Thanks! I've just added this little car charm." She showed you her new charm. "Went on a road trip over the long weekend."

"Fun! Where'd you go?" You asked her.

"We went to-"

"So!" Professor Choi Sooyoung randomly bursted out in a loud voice and clapped her hands together and the chatter of the classroom died down. "Now that we're done with group projects, we will be focusing on your individual project."

"No more working together," you whispered and frowned at your friend beside you while the Professor talked.

"I'm sad." She pouted back.

"You're more than welcome to take the film in any direction you like as long as it focuses on dark themes." Professor Choi Sooyoung sat on the table. "Any questions?"

Someone raised their hand. "Is sexual intimacy on the table?"

"Everything is on the table: addiction, sex. As long as there's a message behind it. We're all adults here. I'll release a more detailed guideline that you can refer to later." She replied. "But don't go around shooting porn." Some people in the classroom groaned in disappointment.

"I will also be submitting these to a local competition, and whoever gets first place, wins a sponsored trip." This information caused chatter and murmer among your classmates including you. "So I expect quality work from each and everyone of you." She commented and then resumed her lecture till class was over.

You and your friend walked out the lecture hall and headed to the library cafe for a quick pick-me-up before you went your separate ways. "Gosh, I thought this would be an easy elective but she's submitting this to a competition!" You groaned and your friend reciprocated.

"I heard she didn't even do this last semester. Some just filmed on their phone and submitted it as is. So many people got an easy A." Your friend huffed and complained.

"What the heck! Shoot, I don't even have a camera!" The class had only worked and submitted on group projects so far this semester, you took this elective solely because it sounded fun and heard that the professor was chill most of the time, so you had different roles like a script writer or the props person instead of the camera man or the director. Your heart thumped raced in your head at the fact you had to carry all these heavy roles just for an elective! You didn't even own a camera! "Do you have any I can borrow or rent?" You asked as you both entered the library cafe.

"Sorry, I'm also borrowing mine from a friend's friend." She frowned in response. Your lips pursed into a thin and nodded understandingly. "Wait! Let me ask my friend!" She screamed almost too loudly where she received death stares from other people around her. Even though there was a cafe in the library, the quiet rule was still heavily enforced throughout the premise. "Maybe I can ask my friend's friend if he has extra cameras laying around? He's super into photography."

"Really? It's fine if he doesn't have any, I'll find a different way." You reassured her.

"Let me just give it a try." She texted her friend's friend and he promptly texted her back."Yes!" She exclaimed. "He has a couple extra old ones that he doesn't mind lending to you but they're still in good condition. Is that alright for you?"

"More than perfect! I'm just trying to pass this class." You smiled brightly and your heart let out a breath of relief. Now you can focus on other things and order your favourite drink.

"Ok, his name is Bae Jinyoung and I'll text you his contact info." She swiftly sent you his contact information via text.

"Thanks! You're the best!" You hugged her while you both stood in line at the cafe, waiting to order your drinks. The cafe was always occupied with people but today was a bit of a quiet day, granted most of them were still in class while yours ended early.

The second you stepped into the cafe, you glanced at Jeno who sat across from Chenle as they both played games on their phones. Well, you didn't exactly see Chenle but you saw the back of his head which was unmistakably his. There was a secret you kept to yourself and never whispered it to a single soul - not because you were ashamed of it but because you felt silly, almost cliche-like, for liking a popular guy who had never noticed you and it wasn't like you made an effort to get acquainted with him like most people do with their crushes, especially since you knew he infamously doesn't do relationships. You've heard the stories from acquitances and classmates, Jeno's a straightforward type of person who makes it clear from the beginning that it would only be physical, but alas, there was something about his charm, his looks, the way he fucked that made girls fall deeper and deeper with him. Some of them were bold and tried to shoot their shot but Jeno would reject them faster than you could say airball. It would devastate you to have all of him, yet, he was never yours to begin with.

"Staring at Lee Jeno?" Your friend teased and nudged your shoulders while you waited behind someone in line.

Your eyes widened at the fact you got caught staring at Jeno. "N-no," your denial made heat crawled up to your back. "You don't see people with red hair everyday." You pointed to Jeno's hairdo.

"Girl, it's fine. He's hot and cute." Your friend also glanced at Jeno was remained oblivious at the two souls staring at him.

"Someone has a crush," you playfully diverted the attention to her instead.

She snorted at your statement. "He's good looking but not my type."

"Not your type?"

"You know, popular, it's like dating a celebrity. I would get so jealous if other girls constantly looked at my man," she explained.

"Yeah, I get it."

"Is that why you've never talked to him?"

Why the hell was she perspective for? "No!" You jumped in almost too defensively. "Yeah he's cute but he gives me the ick." There was a sliver of truth in your statement. "I saw him sneeze into his hands instead of his elbow or a tissue." When it happened, you were both in the cafe library but you were seated in a corner waiting for your friend to arrive. While Jeno stood in line to order his drink. From a distance, you took note how he finally shed his leather jacket and hoodie when the weather was warmer and traded it for a black T-shirt. You were secretly admiring the way his biceps flexed against the short sleeves but that moment was interrupted when his whole body jolted into a sneeze and he covered it with his hands. Ew. Then proceeded to pay and take his drink with the same unwashed hands. Men. Safe to say you called the time of death on your crush.

"Ew," your friend's face morphed into the exact expression of disgust you made when it happened and you couldn't helped but laugh.

"What would you like to order?" The cashier asked as you both now stood in front of her.

"I'll have a Frappuccino mocha with extra chocolate drizzle." Your friend gave her order to the cashier.

"And I'll have an iced peach lemon tea, please." You promptly added afterwards.

"What size for both?"

"Regular, huh." You informed the cashier.

"Alright, thanks. Your order will be ready once this beeps." She handed a small black device once you both paid for your drinks.

Then, you both situated yourself in the corner booth since it was empty while you waited for your order to be called on. "What are you planning to do for your assignment by the way?" You asked her.

"I'll figure it out later but something along the lines of toxic love, domestic abuse or even touch upon Stockholm syndrome since it sounds interesting to me."

"Ooh! Definitely go for it, I would watch that in a heartbeat." You replied enthusiastically.

"How about you?"

"Ooh," you hissed and gave her question a thought. "I'm leaning towards a thriller type of thing, murder just sounds appealing."

She snorted and quietly laughed at your response. "That sounds so weird without context."

   Lee Jeno was a simple man: show up to class, show up to practice, and commit to it. Clean, simple, and predictable. Relationships on the other hand, there were messy, too many variables and miscellaneous feelings involved with no clear winner.

Hence why Jeno kept it straightforward and simple with anyone involved; he makes it clear that it's purely a mutual physical relationship with no labels. If they didn't like it? More than welcome to leave. However, there were still people who chose to read beyond Jeno's words and attemptted to pursue a relationship. He could only shake his head at their silly pursuits and sigh in disappointment before he broke it off. Of course, on more than one occasion, he was met with girls who felt upset and betrayed by him so they hit him, cursed him, smeared his name, and he pretty much had braced himself against those reactions - that was fine. The worst of all was when they would act out in public and dragged him under the scrutinizing eyes of strangers. For once, it would be nice to have someone who understood him and cleanly break it off with no feelings involved.

There was something else he loved as much as the concept of simplicity and predictability - the rush of adrenaline. There was something addicting and inticing to the thrill of not knowing the bounds of your limits. He too found it ironic that two matters on the opposite side of the spectrum was something he liked. The rush of speeding through the highway on his bike, the intense countdown from the game to make his bet, and stupid bets that had no real value to it

"I bet you can't do it." Chenle sucked in the last bits of his coconut matcha and wriggled his eyebrows at Jeno with that cheesy grin of his.

Jeno rolled his eyes and ran his fingers through his faded red hair; that was another stupid bet with Chenle, which he unfortunately lost hence the red hair, it was a bet to see who could break more eggs with their head, and lo and behold, it was Zhong Chenle. 42 vs 32. "I can, just don't want to." He rolled his eyes at Chenle.

"Not even if you tried." Chenle snorted which provoked the competitive spirit that was slowly burning up in Jeno as Chenle continued to mocked him.

"You're trying to lure me in." He leaned closer to Chenle. "I'm not doing it." Jeno was determined to not be pulled into Chenle's silly antics again.

"I dare you." His signature grin plastered on his face.

"No." Jeno replied in a bored tone.

"Please!" Chenle whined too loudly which received death glares from other people around them.

Jeno grew conscious of the unwanted stares and toned down his voice even more even though he wasn't the one speakinf loudly. "No."

"I'll give you a thousand!" He begged with his hands clasped together.

"A thousand?" Jeno gawked at the preposition Chenle was throwing for a silly little bet. "Really?" He knew that Chenle had more than enough money to burn for silly things like this but, even then, it was going too far. The stakes did not match the reward.

There was smug smirked stitched on Chenle's face. "Need to burn all my money somehow." He shrugged cockily.

God was he sometimes annoying. "Go on." Nevertheless, he was intrigued with Chenle's proposition.

"If you lose, you give me your motorbike."

"Fuck no way, bets off. You don't even have a license." Jeno shook his head. "I saved up money to buy that bike."

"Nah, it would be the perfect practice bike." He leaned back against the chair and crossed his legs. "Gotta scratch something up before I buy a real bike."

"My motorbike is a Kawasaki Ninja ZX-14R that can speed at 295 kilometres per hour, " Jeno punched Chenle, "while you scream riding at the back."

"It's because I want to feel Jeno Oppa's hard abs." He cackled and teased by simultaneously touching his biceps and and up but Jeno shooed him away.

"No bet." Jeno shook his head, he knew it was too good to be true.

"So, what I'm hearing is that you're a," Chenle paused for a second. "Chicken," he whispered in Jeno's ear and there was a devilish grin on his face.

"It's not wor-" Jeno took a deep breath and closed his eyes. This was just one of Chenle's many tactics to make other people do stupid things.

"Bok, bok, bok." Chenle started clucking with his hands near his armpit.

"I'm not going to do it." Jeno stood firm.

"Bok, bok, bok." His neck pecked out of his body with his eyes wide opened with his arms folded to the side. "Bok, bok, bok."

"Fine." Jeno grumbled and pursed his lips into a thin line. "So, how's this going to work?"

Chenle clapped his hands excitedly, which received another round of angry stares from people nearby. "You have to date the first girl who orders an iced peach lemon tea for three months. No dating apps, no cheating, a full-on committed relationship." He explained the Jeno premise of the bet.

"Fine, deal."

"Yes!" They both shook on it, especially Chenle with his vigorous handshake. Jeno was a hostage since Chenle was insistent that they would find the perfect candidate at the cafe library. Although Jeno was held against his will, he didn't mind spending the rest of the afternoon there since all his classes for the day was in the morning. Chenle, however, skipped his afternoon class in favour of waiting for the person to order the drink, he would occasionally checked for the time on his watch. They hadn't noticed how quickly time passed because they were engrossed with a game on their respective phones.

"You're so shit at this game." Jeno commented.

"Shut the fuck up. One more round." Chenle's competitive streak was burning with passion.

"Let's just pick whoever comes next, easy." Jeno piped up after awhile.

"No, no, we have to pick the person who orders an iced peach lemon tea." Chenle was insistent. "One more round, dude." So they resumed their game until they heard someone order the drink.

"Iced peach lemon tea, please." A female voice ordered which caught both of the attention. Jeno turned around to see the person who ordered the drink and raised his eyebrow as he watched you and your friend slid into the corner booth. His eyes blinked slowly and his eyebrows knitted together; there was something about you that seemed oddly familiar but he couldn't quite pinpoint it. Were you in the same class as him? No. He would've remembered seeing someone as pretty as you in his class. A party? Not that either.

"We found your girl." Chenle cackled while he rubbed his hands together like an evil maniac. "The bet officially starts now. Go ask her out."

Jeno dusted his hands off his black cargo pants, ready to get up from the chair after hours slummed in the chair, when a cashier approached Chenle. "I'm sorry but we have to ask you to leave the premise." She informed about his much needed departure.

"What?" His voice boomed throughout the gigantic, enclosed space. "For what?!"

"People have been complaining about the disruptive noise." She glanced nervously at him. "Which is you."

"I've been anything but disruptive! These bitches should mind their business!" His voice grew louder and louder without his realising it. People stared at him with a frown on their faces.

At this point, heat crawled up from Jeno's neck all the way up to his ears and he had his head down in embarrassment. "Chenle, apologise and leave." He whispered in a hushed tone to Chenle.

"No, I want to watch you ask her out." He whined to Jeno.

"Just apologise and leave. I promise I'll ask her out." Jeno lightly scolded Chenle like was a child.

"Fine, I will leave but I will not apologise for simply existing." He snagged his sunglasses on and sashayed out the door.

"Sorry about the disturbance," Jeno flashed a sheepish smile at her, only for her to return a tight smile before she went back to the counter.

Jeno sat back down again and waited for everyone's to focus on their own thing. He glanced at you and noticed that your friend had gotten up and left the place, leaving you all by yourself. He watched the way your features tightened when you read a specific part of a book and your slightly frown on your on the corner of your lips. That's when it hit him! You were the girl he pucked! He had visited you a couple of times in the hospital while you were still unconscious, you looked frail and grey on your bedside, he even met your parents who were understanding of the whole situation. Despite that, the guilt never faded and he wanted to see you and apologise in person once he heard that you woke up, but your parents informed him that you were focusing on recovering and didn't want to relive the moment - scared that it might trigger you. So, he left you alone. It was like fate had brought you back to him and not some stupid bet.

Jeno got up from his seat and went to you. "Hey, you're yn right?" he whispered softly but it caught your attention as you looked up at him.

You froze. Lee Jeno coming up to you was not a daily occurrence (more of a never occurrence). You took a quick glanced at his attire: team hoodie and black cargo pants. He has practice today. Maybe it was the combination of you noticing anything Jeno related and him being a creature of habit that you instantly knew what he was up to based on his outfit. If he wore his team hoodie with cargo pants or track pants, he had practice and if he wore a simple shirt or his leather jacket, it meant that he didn't have practice that day. "Hi," your confused tone didn't go unnoticed by him.

"You're the girl I accidentally pucked, right? I'm really sorry." He apologised sheepishly. "I'm Jeno by the way," he introduced himself to you like he wasn't one of the most well-known guys on campus and extended his hand to shake with yours.

You muffled a chuckle at his cute behaviour and shook his hand. "Yeah, I heard from my parents that you dropped by often."

"I've been meaning to get in touch with you but your parents said you were focusing on recovering." He shoved his hands in his black cargo pants as he talked. "How are you doing?"

"Well, had a raging concussion but now I'm better than ever. Even got a break thanks to you." You cracked a light joke and he chuckled in return.

"Can I treat you to a meal? As reparation for pucking you." He asked you.

"Right now?"

"If you're free. Or, any other time is fine too, just let me know."

Your heart raced at the thought of being on a one-on-one date with Jeno, even though he didn't say it was a date but whatever. Years of admiring and creeping him from afar, and sure, you've imagined countless of ways how your meet cute would be but this took a surprising turn, "now is fine," you replied.

   It was a family-style restaurant with dim-lights, warm ambiance, and cozy food. It wasn't too far from campus and it was a place that you and Jeno frequented often with your respective friends. A heavy guilt settled in Jeno's chest as he watched you happily devour your food with a glint on your face. He has disappointed girls on more than one occasion, even angered them, but to his defence, he made it clear from the beginning what being with him entailed. However, using a girl for his own personal benefit, a stupid bet, was stooping too low for him. Especially a girl he accidentally concussed. With shaky hands he placed his utensils down on the table. "Listen," he braced himself, "I have something to confess."

You stopped eating midway and stared at him. Jeno had a cool exterior implanted on his face but there was a concerned look on his face that you couldn't decipher, yet, it made you anxious.

"I wasn't completely honest with you when I asked you out to dinner." He trailed off for a second before confessing, "this was a bet."

The corners of your lips frowned the slightest and the grip on your fork tightened. "I'm sorry?" You blinked a couple of times making sure your hearing wasn't impaired, "this dinner was a bet?"

"The dinner itself wasn't a bet, dating you for three months was the bet." He explained. "Bet or no bet, I wanted to treat you either way, sorry it had to be like this."

You nodded your head. "And you picked me because…?"

"It was random. Chenle dared me to ask out the person who orders an iced peach lemon tea and we have to date for three months." Jeno explained.

You snickered at the mention of Chenle, "wow, that is so Chenle."

"You know him?"

"Yeah, we're kinda like friends, I guess. He hangs out with my friends a lot."

"Mine too." You both chuckled at this while Jeno ran his hand through his soft hair. "Sorry fuck, it was shitty of me for using you like this, especially after I caused you a concussion."

"Yeah, you did." You nodded in agreement.

"I'll just pay and I won't disturb you ever again."

Jeno's honesty about the whole situation reminded you exactly why you fell for him even more. It was a couple years ago and you and a group of girls were simply having fun at a club, minding your own business, when a guy kept harassing some of the girls in your group for their phone number. He had a sleezy grin on his face and danced way too close to you guys and everytime you guys moved away, he moved even closer, following wherever you all went. You didn't even realise Jeno was also at the club with his friends, he went up to guy and practically scared the creepy dude away with his mere presence. Although he left with another girl that night, your heart fell even deeper for him. "What's the prize?" You asked as you took a bite of your food.

Jeno cocked his head to the side with a slight eyebrow raised, intrigued by your reaction. You were a stranger to him so he wasn't sure what to expect from you: hitting, kicking, or even throwing food at him."If I win, Chenle owes me 1000."

"Real money?" Your eyes widened at the amount for a stupid bet.

"Yes, direct transfer."

"And if you lose?" You followed up with a different question.

"He gets my motorbike." Jeno groaned at the thought of Chenle's grubby hands all over his bike.

"He doesn't even have a license!" You pointed out.

"That's exactly what I said!" Jeno remarked while a small corner of his lips lifted.

"So, are you going to lose your Kawasaki Ninja ZX-14R to him now? "

His eyes glinted with amusement at you name-dropping his bike, "most likely," he replied, "probably going to get it scratched or lose it before he completely abandons it at his place forever."

"Or, you can like not give it to him." You suggested. "You are physically stronger than him."

He inhaled a hissed, "a deal is a deal, doll," and a real man, according to Jeno, always lives up to his promises no matter what and it wasn't your problem to deal with but his.

"Ah," a quiet silence stretched over between the two of you as only the cluttered sounds of utensils and faint chatter from other tables filled in the background. "What if you don't have to lose it?" You stared at him right in the eye.

Jeno furrowed his eyebrows at your question. "What do you mean?"

"We can make easy money." You explained to him,"we'll pretend to date for three months, split the money, and then break up." You explained. "And you get to keep your bike and Chenle doesn't have to any know about any of this." Maybe there was a side effect of the concussion. The most logical thing you should've done was throw water in his face and walk away but somehow you weren't angry with the revelation. Disappointed? Yes. Angry? No.

"I don't get into relationships." He commented on your plan.

"I said pretend to date but ok then," you shrugged off the thought of making easy money down the drain and resumed eating your food, might as well get some reparations from him. "You alright if I order dessert?" You asked for the waiter before he even replied to your dessert question - maybe extra food too but he didn't seem to notice since he was busy cutting up his meat. Your eyes gleamed when the waiter brought over the dessert, a decadent-looking chocolate cake, which swiftly came within minutes.

On the other side of the table, Jeno was mulling your offer in his head as you happily ate your dessert; you even offered to share the chocolate cake with him but he shook his head, letting you indulge the entire thing. The proposition you offered meant that he would still win the bet and keep his bike while you get a portion of the prize money too. The more he watched you beamed while eating, the more it seemed like a compelling offer. "Let's do it." He muttered.

"Do what?" The offer no longer swirled your head as you indulged in the sweet chocolate cake.

"What you said," he clarified, "pretend to date."

"Really? You just said you don't date." You scrutinised him.

"I don't date. Like what you said, we'll pretend to date for three months, go to parties and games together, but we'll secretly see whoever we want." He proposed the plan to you.

"Won't people out you as a cheater if you hook up with other people?" You questioned him as you ate the frosting off the chocolate cake.

"Don't worry, they're not from here." He reassured you.

"Ok, that all seems fine but I'm not going to your games. Ever." You hummed in deep thought as you finished up your chocolate cake. "And! I dump you, not the other way round."

Jeno nodded once. "Sure, I don't care about the who dumped whom stuff."

"And!" You piped up one more time. "You have to star in my film assignment."

"Ahh," his body shifted awkwardly and rubbed the back of his neck with his hand. "I can't act."

"Don't worry about it," you waved off a hand, "there's no script yet but I just need you for your body." A waiter came by with your takeaway and set it on the table but her innocent eyes were wide opened and left but not without giving you and Jeno a shaky stare.

"So, I'm a prop to you?" He playfully asked you.

"Ahhh," you faked winced and touched your previously injured forehead.

Jeno knew you were playing around but he couldn't help but felt a wave of guilt when you pointed to your forehead. "Ok," he let out a reluctant sighed, "I'll do it but I warned you about my acting skills."

You stopped pretending to be hurt and instantly released a satisfactory smile at him. You extended your hand towards Jeno, "deal," your right hand suspended in the air, waiting for Jeno to shake on it.

He hesitated for a second but held onto your right hand without shaking it. "Remember, please don't fall in love with me. People want more from me even though I told them from the beginning that I don't do relationships and I don't want to hurt you a second time." Jeno said in a hushed tone as he stared at you with a determined gaze.

You pulled an easy smile that hid your true feelings for him. "Don't worry, that flew out the window the moment your puck hit my head." You smoothly lied to Jeno, your heart twisted in agony but you kept a light expression on your face.

"What's it about, anyways?" He asked.

"I'm tinkering with the idea of murder."

He cocked his head to the side. "Huh, that's different. Never expected you to do something like this."

"Well, yeah, the assignment was to explore a dark theme like addiction or drugs, really it's up to us."

"Sounds cool."

"The Professor is going to submit all of our work to this local competition and the most critically acclaimed piece, but they will also take account the amount of views from the public, will win a sponsored trip!" You excitedly told him.

A small corner of Jeno's lips lifted upwards and his eyes twinkled in amusement. "So, you're using me for clout." He leaned in closer to you.

You involuntarily moved your head back. You touched your injured spot and let out a faux winced - again. "Ahh, my head," even dropped your head down to make it realistic.

Jeno chuckled at your antics. "Are we going to go with the murder storyline?" He asked. "Am I the murderer?"

"Yeah no, I thought about it and I like the idea of murdering you, not the other way round." The same waitress came by with the check and the card machine. The machine vibrated due to her shaky hands as Jeno tapped his card on it. "Excuse me, can I have extra paper napkins please?" You politely asked the waitress; you loved collecting little knick knacks from places you visited and paste all of them in a journal - a visual diary of the mundane things in your life.

When she came back with your paper napkins, she also gave Jeno an extra one which confused him because he didn't request for one. He opened it and laughed when he saw what had been written on it.

"What's so funny?" You asked him.

He slid the paper to you. Tap on the table twice if you need help. Your jaw dropped to the floor in disbelief while Jeno continued to laughed. You both got up from your seats and before he exited the door, he stopped by the waitress who gave him the paper napkin, "thanks for being concerned about me but I'm more than fine," and left a tip for her.

   The notification sound from his phone reminded him that he was running late to meet you for the filming, so he stealthily left the bed without a noise. Goodbye. He glanced one last time at her slumber figure. It happened again, just when he thought everything was going well, she confessed how she wanted more from him: a label, a relationship. And just like that, it ended.

He biked his way to the location you shared since you wanted to film outside of campus. By the time he had arrived, you were already there waiting for him and waved at him. The day before yesterday, Jeno had received the script for the assignment that he could refer to; the film will focus on Jeno's character's daily life, a popular and well-liked guy, who one day receives an anonymous love letter. The letter seemed harmless at first but the more "Jeno" ignored it, the more he felt like someone was watching his every move until his paranoia is what kills him. Shivers. Literal chills went through his bones when he read your script. It was dark and twisted, presented in an everyday life situation, a twist within a twist.

It felt nostalgic seeing him with black hair because the last time time you saw him with black hair was when you went to his first ice hockey game. Then, he dyed his hair chestnut brown, blonde for a brief period, blue when you unfortunately got hit by the puck, red, and now black. Your heart fluttered a bit when he came closer. "I like your hair," you complimented him.

"Thanks, it's been awhile," he ran his fingers through his hair.

"Yeah, I know." Your words slipped.

Jeno quirked an eyebrow at your words. "How do you know it's been awhile?" He crossed his arm with an amuse smile on him. "You like me, huh?"

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, buddy," you hissed sarcastically and patted him on the back awkwardly. Damn, he's so hard. His back muscles, ok!

Jeno bit back a smile and cleared his throat, "so, what are we going to do today?"

"We're going to be filming some scenes out of order but the main scene I want to film is you on a busy street, going to different places but you're constantly looking over your shoulders because you feel like someone is watching you but nothing is there and your paranoia is feasting inside you like a parasite," you explained the objective of today's shoot.

Jeno took a step back after you explained everything, "this is fictional, right?" His tone wavered with anxiety.

"I promise that no actors will be harmed in the making of this film." You placed your hand to your heart with a smile stitched on you.

Time flew by fast, filming one scene after another, and snack breaks in between, of course, until the sun had set. You stretched out your body since your body was aching from crouching down all day. "Thanks for today, Jeno, you did great," and gave him a thumbs up.

"As long as there's minimal talking." He cracked a joke and you lightly laughed at it.

At that moment, you received a text from your friends asking you when you were coming. Oh yeah! You were supposed to meet them at the food festival on campus tonight. "I gotta go back now, my friends are waiting for me." You told Jeno.

"Alright," he shuffled his feet against the asphalt road, "how are you going back by the way?"

"I'll take the bus if there's time or take the cab if I'm in a pinch." You zipped up the camera in its bag and double checked just to make sure everything was in there.

"Or, I can drop you off." Jeno offered.

"You came here with your bike, right?"

"Yeah, and it's faster if we go back with it," he gestured to his monstrous vehicle and buckled in his helmet.

Pre-injured you would've immediately hopped on without a second thought because no way were you going to turn down a fun ride on a cool motorbike. However, post-injured you discovered how difficult it was to recover from an injury and motorbikes were notorious for it. "I'm not getting on that gigantic thing without a helmet," you remarked.

"Oh, wait." Jeno took out a spare helmet beneath the seat of the bike and placed it on your head. "Ah, this is not going to work," he knocked the side of the helmet and it wobbled over your head, "it's too big."

You removed the helmet off your head, "it's fine, I'll take a cab."

"Nonsense," he took the helmet back and laid it back in its place and then started measured the circumference of your head with his fingers. "I'll get crucified if people found out you went back yourself at night when I'm right here, you know, now that we're fake dating."

"Uhhh, what are you doing?" A bit confused with his random action.

"Measuring the circumference of your head." Once he measured your head, he noted it down on his phone, "wait here," and left with his bike but came back within ten minutes.

"That was fast," you were surprised at the speed he left and came back.

"Yeah, the shop's nearby." He took out another, smaller helmet this time that was identical to his. It was black and, this time, it fitted your head perfectly; he knocked his knuckles on the side of the helmet and smiled. "Perfect, now your head's protected."

You wobbled your head side to side and the helmet stayed perfectly intact. "Thanks!"

"Oh, shit." He realised, "I should've asked you what colour you wanted instead of buying black like mine."

You laughed at him. "It's ok, it's cute. It could be our couple's item." You reassured him.

Jeno's heart skipped a beat at your statement. "Ok, let's go," he gave you a handsome smile. He straddled in the front and patted the backseat for you. "Sit here."

You took a deep breath and position yourself behind him on the edge of the seat, with a respectable distance from him and placed your hands on his shoulders. "Ok, I'm ready!"

"It's safer if you hold onto me." He remarked.

"I'm good." You patted his shoulders. "Let's go!"

He cranked his head to the side, "suit yourself then." Jeno hit the pedal harder than he normally does so the bike jerked, and you ended up slipping forward right behind him - your chest pressed against his wide back. "You good?" He asked.

"Yeah," you held onto the sides of his jacket with a steady hold. "Ride safely."

At first, Jeno rode the bike at a slow pace, for him but not for you, he eventually got onto the highway as a shortcut to go back to campus, and that was when you wrapped your hands around Jeno's waist and felt his hard abs even beneath all the layers of clothing. He drove faster than usual and a sly, victorious smirk appeared when he felt you hugging him tighter.

People knew when Jeno was around because his bike was loud and people naturally looked at him. So, imagine the surprise on everyone's face when they realised, a girl, was getting off Jeno's motorbike - a never seen before phenomenon.

"What-" Ryujin watched you get off Jeno's motorbike at a food festival on campus ground.

"The-" Yeji's eyes widened and her jaw dropped when she realised it was you with Lee Jeno.

"Fuck." Haechan muttered with his mouth full of corndog.

All three of them froze when Jeno took off your helmet first before he did his. "Hey guys! How's the food so far?" You cheerily greeted Ryujin and Yeji like nothing unusual was happening.

"What the fuck is happening here?" Haechan spoke clearly now that his corndog was all chewed up.

You tilted your head at Haechan with a nonchalant expression, "what?"

"This!" Ryujin made weird gestures with her that was directed at you and Jeno.

"Is this why you were late?" Yeji side-eyed Jeno.

"Yeah, he was helping me film."

"Oh," Haechan smirked, "what kind of filming?"

"It's for an assignment." Jeno rolled his eyes at Haechan's obvious sexual innuendo.

"That's how most of my favourite videos start of," Haechan suggestively commented, which pissed Jeno off because the nature of your relationship was far from that, in a quick swift, Jeno headlocked Haechan with his arm until Haechan tapped out and apologised. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Jeno released him while Haechan coughed out a choked, gasping for air.

"Is that it?" Ryujin asked you.

You glanced at Jeno before you answered her question, "he's also my boyfriend," and wrapped your hand around his bicep.

"What!" All three of them yelled out at the same time in a disastrous panic full of questions and rage.

"You didn't tell us anything!" Ryujin and Yeji whined and kept on asking questions.

Haechan reacted the same way, "but you don't do relationships, what the fuck!" He pointed out to Jeno. "Is this some sort of dare? If yes, where do I sign up? This shit would be easy money to make."

You and Jeno gave each other a knowing look, and didn't even get a chance to respond to any of the questions because another friend of yours, Wonjin, came back with some fried food and some of Jeno's other friends from the hockey team showed up - unaware of the commotion you both caused.

"Hey, what's happening?" Wonjin asked as he took a bite of his langos.

"They're dating," Yeji replied.

"You guys are dating?! Sungchan piped up instead of Wonjin.

"Since when?" Serim asked with eyes that popped out his socket.

"Dude, are you being for real?" Mark asked while everyone else huddled up even closer to you both, waiting patiently for his answer.

"Yes," Jeno replied in a simple tone.

"I don't trust you, Lee Jeno." Wonjin shook his head as he pointed his finger at him.

"Make her cry and I'll cut your balls off." Ryujin threatened with neck slice motion.

"But you ghost girls after they confess their feelings to you!" Serim pointed out in agony.

"The concussion got to her." Yeji commented while she fawned all over you. "You hypnotized her when she was in a coma."

"No, I don't trust any of this." Sungchan crossed his arms.

"It's super, super, sus." Mark repeated in disbelief. "Like, super sus. Super."

Small beads of sweat clamped up in the palm of Jeno's hands when one of them asked how and when they started dating. It hadn't been that long since your first "date" and you had never discussed your backstory. Jeno glanced down at you and interlocked his hands with yours. "It's real, we went out on a date." The tone of his voice was not convincing anyone, including you.

"Yeah, it's all still very new but we are dating." You added on. "We started texting each other after I recovered and then he asked me out on a date and here we are."

A collective sound of ah's and ooh's chorused within the group, even Jeno was impressed with your quick coverup.

"Why didn't you tell us earlier that you were talking to him?" Wonjin asked you.

"Because it was nothing, and all of a sudden it was something." You shrugged.

"You owe us a detail story later ," Ryujin remarked, "and my threat still remains!" She pointed her fingers at him.

"Can we go eat now or what? I'm over this." Haechan complained and everyone agreed to it.

"We're going to steal her for now," Yeji hooked her arm with yours and pulled you away from Jeno, "you will always be second priority, Lee Jeno."

You flashed a mischious grin when a bright idea popped in your head, "Jeno, is it ok if I order fries?" You asked him in a sweet voice.

"Is it ok if you order fries?" Yeji repeated after you and gave a menacing stare to Jeno.

"Shit," Haechan raised his hand, "I didn't know you were controlling like that."

"We don't fuck with him like that." Sungchan made an "X" sign with his arms.

"What a control freak," Serim commented.

Sweats ran down the sides of his temples and his hands became even clammier over this random accusation. "I'm not! You can have all the fries you want!" Jeno uttered out in a panic.

"Wow, so now you don't care about her sodium intake." Wonjin sighed.

"She just recovered from a head injury which you caused. What sick kind of behaviour is this?" Haechan remarked.

"You don't care for her fucking health!" Mark cried out.

Their scolding and angry voices drowned out of Jeno's ears when he caught your eyes staring at him and watched how you were failing miserably trying to hold back a laughter. Oh, you were trouble.

  Rumours floated around on campus that the Lee Jeno, who was infamous for rejecting relationship advances, happened to be in one. People had seen you and Jeno walk around on campus or on "dates" but everyone brushed it off thinking it wasn't real or it was temporary. Especially since you had never shown up to any of his games - classic 101 girlfriend support.

So imagine the surprised or shocked looks on everyone's faces when you walked into the party with Jeno's hand on your back, guiding you through the crowded house, the ice hockey team's house - cementing the fact that you were in fact dating. Some even gave you nods of approval or dapped you up for locking the Jeno Lee down. Being with a popular person like Jeno meant that people would often come up to him just to say hi or make small talk and he never ignored any of them; being his girlfriend meant that you also received a similar treatment.

"There's the man of the hour!" Someone shouted as Jeno and you entered a room in the house that was slightly secluded from the loud music where everybody danced.

"My man makes history shooting the last shot in the last second!" Another one hollered.

"Pew, pew, pew." Some other guy threw Jeno a bro fist.

"Yo! Come join our game." Mark yelled out. There were a quite a few people gathered in a circle including: Haechan, Serim, Mark, Chenle, and Sungchan.

You took a seat first on the floor next to Chaeryeong and Jeno followed suit but Haechan called him out on it. "No couples next to each other!" and pointed him to a different seat beside Sungchan.

Chenle didn't missed the way Jeno frowned when he had to changed seats. "We're going to play Spin the Bottle, and instead of Truth or Dare which has been done to death, it's the Whisper Game." Chenle explained.

"The Whisper Game?" You whispered to Chaeryeong.

"Yup, it's just like Spin the Bottle and whoever the bottle points to, the person can whisper their question and your answer has to be someone within the circle." Chaeryeong explained. "If other people want to know what the question was, they have to take a shot."

"No boring questions or you're out of the game!" Haechan reminded everyone. "Let's gets drunk!" Everyone cheered and Serim spun the bottle first. It started off with easy questions and then it became more intense with secrets revealed or silly pent up emotions from someone else; either way, some people asked you questions, you asked other people questions, and you drank to a lot of it.

It was Chenle's turn to spin the bottle and it landed on you. At this point, your eyes were hazy, barely holding it open, and your sentence slurred with each word. Chenle went up to you and whispered his question, "who has the biggest dick?" Without hesitation, you pointed to Jeno.

"I'm drinking!" Sungchan took a shot,

"Me too!" Chaeryeong shouted.

Soon, the entire circle, including Jeno, had taken a shot so Chenle had to reveal the question. "The question was who has the biggest dick?"

"His 9-inch-dick!" You yelled out loud with a proud smile on your face but you were barely holding yourself together because your mind was so inebriated. "It's so huge and pretty…like," you widened the gap between your hands till it was around nine inches long and giggled to yourself, "this big."

Everyone laughed, hooted, or hollered at this and Jeno's ears were undeniably pink from all the attention. He watched how your head fell over Chaeryeong's shoulder and decided it was time to call it quits for the night. He got up from his seat and crouched down beside you who was still leaning on Chaeryeong's shoulder. "Do you wanna go now?" He tucked a lock of hair behind your ear and spoke only loud enough for you to hear. The only response he got from you was a low hummed followed by an indecipherable sentence and took it as a cue to end the night.

"We're calling it in, thanks guys." He wrapped one hand behind your back and the other below your knees and lifted you off the ground.

"Boooooooo!" Haechan and everyone else chorused when Jeno carried

Jeno made his way upstairs to his bedroom and laid you down carefully on his bed. He had planned to pull over the blanket on you but you started muttering utter nonsense.

"Jeno," you whined drunkenly and touched his dick over his jeans. "Let me have it, please," and palmed over him.

"W-what?" He was flustered at your sudden behaviour and dropped the blanket down.

With clumsy hands but a desperate attitude, you unbuckled his belt with such ease for who a person who was not sober. "Just once, please." You pleaded while Jeno held your wrist together.

"N-no." He stuttered and held you down with zero strength from him.

"Please," you cried as you rubbed your face against his cloth dick that was slowly growing hard under your touch.

"No." He had to be more firm with you. You presented yourself with puppy-dog eyes which pulled a tug in Jeno's heart but he still shook his head.

"Fine," you frowned with your head down and he withdrew his hand from your wrist, relief that the worst was over. Or so he thought. Once your wrist was free from his restraint, you pulled down his jeans and boxer at the same time and his cock stuck out halfway because he stopped you once again. You cried at his restrained, "no fun," you pouted against his dick.

Jeno groaned as he tilted his head back; his first instinct was to grind against your face but resisted the urge because of you were clearly not sober. His cock grew harder, and you whining against it, wasn't making it easier for him. "No." He grunted and pulled you off him. The boxer and jeans was immediately pulled back up again but he hissed as his raging cock came in contact with the rough denim. You were still whining and crying at the lost warm contact of Jeno's touch and in desperate need, you pulled down your tube top and kneaded it. "Please, Jeno."

Fuck, you had the most perfect pair of tits he had ever seen in his life. Saliva drooled out just a little before he felt the insane guilt for watching you like this when you were drunk. His boner was now rock hard but he turned around and closed his eyes. He grabbed a hoodie of his and with his eyes closed, headed towards to put it on you but not without you putting up a fight.

"Don't want it, Jenoneno," you whined but Jeno won when the hoodie went through your head, he sighed a huge breath of relief; this was for your own good and his. He tucked you in like a burrito so you couldn't escape, it was for both of your own good.

You pouted at him. " 'jus wanted," you yawned mid sentence and your eyes fluttered closed, "your big dick." You were fast asleep.

Jeno eyes glinted with amusement as he silently chuckled. He tucked in a lock of hair that strayed to the front and with a gentle touch, softly grazed against the injured spot - a very small scar was visible. "Next time," he whispered.

There was a raging headache that pulsed through your head when you opened your eyes to a blurry vision. Your head throbbed from the pain but you let it passed until your vision unblurred itself to your surrounding; there was a computer on the desk at the end of the bed, a black helmet on the side table, and random equipments here and there.

A muffled grunt came out from beneath the blanket on the other bed across from yours. A familiar mop of black hair peeked out from it but the rest of the face was still covered with the blanket. You couldn't be bothered to figure out who it was this early in the morning and focused on the sweat that had uncomfortably accumulated on your body when you realised you were wearing a hoodie that was not yours. "Whose hoodie am I wearing?" You muttered to yourself as you tried to remember events before the game but only a dark and blank image came up.

"It's my hoodie," Jeno responded in a raspy voice and lazily pulled down the blanket to reveal his face.

"Jeno?" You asked, "where am I?"

"My room." He replied while sitting up straight on the bed, "and Sungchan's but I have no idea where he is." He looked at you for the first time and chuckled to himself.

You furrowed your eyebrows at him, "why are you laughing?"

"Nothing." He denied with a faint smile.

"Listen, did I," you took a deep breath, "do anything weird last night? I seriously don't remember anything after we started playing."

He paused for a second and then answered. "Nope, you just passed out." His eyes glinted with a playful look. "Except, you did call me Jenoneno."

Your eyes widened as you covered your mouth in a gasped. That was your personal nickname for him! Your inner thoughts slipped out while you were drunk! "And that's it right?" You laughed nervously, waiting for his response.

"Yeah, that's it." He nodded at you and you let out a breath of relieved. "Do you want water by the way?"

"Yeah, that sounds nice."

Jeno got up from the bed, still in the same outfit as last night's and searched for an unopened water bottle but only found empty cans of energy drinks that he should've thrown out a couple days ago. "Sorry, there's none here. Be right back," he stopped just as he was about to exit the room, "oh, the bathroom's here if you wanna use it, and don't worry, it's clean," he exited out the room and closed the door.

You stretched out your limbs one more time over the bed before you made your way to the bathroom. Jenoneno. Jenoneno. Jenoneno. It echoed in your mind a million times while you washed your face with water over the sink. The realisation hit you as you turned off the tap, all the memories flooded back to you: you against his dick, pulling his pants down, and flashing your boobs at him. No wonder he put a hoodie on you. He was saving you from embarrassment! You could literally die from embarrassment right there and then. Gosh, you didn't even liked drinking but the atmosphere got you too carried away.

You came out of the bathroom and thought about escaping through the window but Jeno came back with a water bottle and a singular banana in his hand. Darn it! Plan down the drain.

"Do you want to go out for breakfast?" He handed the items to you. "I would've made you something but the kitchen's a mess."

"Thanks," you muttered as you accepted it. "And no, I just want to go back to my room."

"Ok, I'll drop you off." He grabbed his keys and helmet off the table and headed out the door but you stopped him.

"N-no. I can go back by myself." You stuttered.

"Are you sure?" He cocked his head, "it's not a problem for me. I have to go out either way."

"Ye-yeah, I wanna walk by myself, you know, enjoy nature and all." You explained to him with a nervous tone underneath your voice.

"O-kay," personally, he would've preferred to go with you, especially since you didn't seem like you were in peaked condition but he respected your wish at the end of the day. "I'll see you off at the door, then."

"No!" The tone of your voice accidentally went an octave higher. "You stay here, I'll go." You handed back the banana and water bottle to him.

Jeno pinched his eyebrows together at your actions. "Umm, I'll just see you at the do-"

"No. Please stay." He looked like a confused dog with the way you were talking to him. He wasn't offended or anything - simply confused. You stepped forward and so did Jeno but you really couldn't face him right now. "Stay." You stopped him from following you. "Please."

"The do-"

"Stay." You walked backwards as you made sure Jeno was planted in the same spot. "Good boy." And with that, you ran out the house the moment you exited the door while Jeno watched you from the window.

   "Why are you avoiding me?" He asked as he walked alongside you to the next location for the video - the campus garden. Even though he often felt awkward in front of the camera, your presence behind the camera and your constant encouragement gave him confidence and comfort to "act" in front of the lens. However, you were acting so differently today, almost as if you were avoiding him.

"I'm not." Your speed fastened up a bit when you felt his presence close to you. You absolutely were avoiding him. It took you a great strength of courage and screaming into your pillows before you dragged yourself to meet Jeno. "Ok, lighting seems good here." You played around with the camera and looked through the camera's viewfinder instead of him.

"You're still doing it." He teased you, seeing right through your facade. "Is this about yesterday?" He asked you.

"N-no. Ok, so now we're going to do the scene where yo-"

"yn," he pleaded in a serious tone that you've never heard before and gazed you with a sincere look in his eyes.

You smacked your dry lips and lowered down the camera, timidly nodded with an apologetic look on your face. "I'm sorry for harassing you like that. I don't know what I was thinking." You finally gained the courage to look at him in the eye.

He let out a hearty laughed and slung an arm around your shoulder, "it's fine, we all do stupid shit when we're drunk." He lifted your chin with a touch of his thumb when he noticed how quiet and sullen your face looked. "There was also a time when I got so drunk that I stole a kitten from its mommy and the next day she showed up and scratched me up real bad." He showed you the a small scar on his arm that was still visible.

"That's a cute story not an embarrassing one." Your lips jutted out just a bit.

He unslunged his arm from your shoulder and took your hands in his, tracing soft patterns on it. "There was a time we got so drunk that we trespassed a property to skinny dip in someone's house while they were having dinner."

"What?! Did they call the police or what?" You gasped in shocked at this revelation.

"Yeah they called the police on us," he laughed, "but jokes on them cause the police squad that they dispatched, coincidentally, ended up being my brother."

You snickered at his story, "that's a funny story, not an embarrassing one," and playfully rolled your eyes at him.

He hissed in a breath and held your hands even tighter in his, "we promised to take this to our graves but there was a time I was so shit drunk that I peed on Haechan."

"What?!" You screeched and scowled and moved his hands away from yours face "Ewwww, don't touch me."

"That was a long time ago!" He pointed out and tried to reach for your hands but you swatted him away.

"Don't touch me," you avoided his touch but he kept trying to grab it just to annoy you because of a grin on his face, so you ran away far away from him.

Jeno merely jogged behind you, "come back here. That's why I stopped drinking heavily!"

"Stay away from me." Although you tried to run as fast as possible, your speed was no match compared to Jeno's, a literal athlete, because he effortlessly caught up to you and tackled you on the ground within seconds. "No, no, disgusting, ew." You cried as he pinned you down on the dry grass.

"Shh, don't say that," his eyes widened and he placed a hand over your mouth, "people are going to get the wrong idea," and removed his hand from your lips. You realised that you were both in a compromising position since he hovered above you with knees straddled on either side of your body and his face was inches away from yours; his pupils dilated when you drowned in his eyes, you followed the movement of his gaze where it dropped down to your lips and back again to your eyes. Your heart skipped a beat.

   There was another secret that you had kept to yourself; there were days when your feelings for Jeno is so intense and the only way to let them out of their bubble was to write them down in your Jeno journal. It was a small, black notebook that fits into the palm of your hands, very safe and unassuming to an outsider's eye. You bring that little notebook everywhere with you, though there was a possibility of you losing it somewhere one day, at least you didn't write down his address and have someone mail it to him, that would be embarrassing. He was the only crush of yours that made it into your book.

Today was one of those days. You had just finished your violin practice with your club, which always left your neck strained and sore and even a little hickey on your neck from the long practice. You and Jeno had met up with your friends who were still skeptical of Jeno's intention with you so they grilled him to the bones but he answered everything with such ease that you almost believed that everything was real. The little subtle way that he touches you and takes care of you made your heart race but the moment it was just the two of you, the fantasy disperses because he casually mentioned that he had to leave and meet up with someone. That was the reality of your arrangement.

Your fingers flew across the page, word by word, when a knock on the door interrupted your trope of writing. You got up from the chair, thinking it was Ryujin who forgot to bring her key again but it was Jeno who stood at your door. "Jeno? Hi." You couldn't hide the surprise in your voice. "What are you doing here?"

"You accidentally left your water bottle with me." He handed you the item.

"Oh," wow, no wonder you felt parched even after drinking your iced peach lemon tea the entire day, "thanks Jeno, I needed it."

Jeno stood still at the doorway, observing the state of your room which was a lot more spacious than the average dorm room: the big lights were switched off, only your fairy lights, small lamp, and candles lit up the room in a warm embrace, a mini plant whose leaves gravitated towards the ground and another bed across from yours. "You have a cozy room. Who's your roommate?" He pointed to the bed.

"Thanks! It's Ryujin's but she's out right now."

"On the first floor? Damn, that's hard to get." Jeno knew that if he wasn't part of the ice hockey team, it would be difficult to get a spacious room like yours, especially if it was on the first floor.

"Yeah, they offered it to me when I came back in exchange of, you know, the possibility of not suing them." You explained the situation to him.

He laughed. "That's a pretty good trade."

"Eh, probably should've sued." You shrugged casually.

He looked around some more and noticed your pinboard that he could see from where he stood. There were polaroid pictures of you with your friends and family over the years with little tickets that decorated the board and he even recognised some mutual friends on your board like Chenle. One particular poloroid picture that stood out to him amidst the sea of them was the ice arena that was practically his second home; there was Yeji, Ryujin, Wonjin, Taerae, Chenle, and some other people he didn't recognised, and you, smiling brightly at the camera. He could tell this was taken way before you had even gotten pucked based on Chenle's blonde hair. There was a hollow heart ache that settled in his chest and a question that drummed in his mind, why hasn't he seen you before? There were a couple of other pictures of you at the ice arena but he could not believe he had never met you till you were pucked. A silent want to belong there. "You've been to quite a few of my games," he chuckled as he pointed it out.

"Yeah," you noticed his eyes were also looking around at your desk, where you left your Jeno journal out in the open, so you stealthily snapped it shut. Whew. "Dragged by friends for the experience or what not." Truth be told, you had never minded being dragged to his games even though you pretended to be against it, saying it was boring or just not your thing. You liked watching Jeno play and part of the reason you took plenty of poloroid pictures at his games was because you wanted a picture with him. He was always there in the background even though it was hard to see because he was far away but you knew and that was all you needed. You've seen girls going up to Jeno asking for pictures and he was always so sweet and never said no, you even contemplated asking for one too but felt too embarrassed because you were with your friends and you knew they wouldn't live it down. Just then, your tummy grumbled loudly on cue.

He chuckled at the sound of it. "You hungry?"

"Yeah, just one of those days. I'm probably going to make ramen after this." Even though it was the least appetising food that sounded right now.

"You wanna go out?" He asked you out of nowhere.

"This late at night?"

"There's a diner-style restaurant that's open nearby," he said, "they have really good burgers and milkshakes."

"You had me at milkshakes," already slipping on your hoodie that hung on the back of your chair.

"That was the last thing I said." He pointed out.

There was a natural routine that fell into place now that you often ride his bike with him: he helps you with your helmet then he does his, and you jump to the back while he's at the front and tightly hug around his waist before he motors off.

It was a short ride to the 24/7, diner-style restaurant, 90's Love. You had no idea how you missed this place because it had bright neon lights right in front of it - sometimes you miss the things that are right in front of you. You ordered their signature combo burger with loaded fries and strawberry milkshake while Jeno got a double-double burger for that extra protein and a coke.

"The burger is so good," you moaned in contentment as you chewed down another bite of the juicy burger. "The milkshake too!" You took turns sipping the strawberry milkshake and taking a bite out of the burger, a perfect combination.

"And the loaded fries," he stuffed a couple of fries, that was in between the two of you since you sat side by side in the booth so you both decided to share, down his mouth.

"Ooh, haven't tried the fries yet," you took a couple and copied him, "oh, that's good," you beamed happily.

"Got a little sauce on you," he wiped the sauce on the corner of your lip with his bare thumb and sucked the remnants of it before he went back to his burger.

Your heart throbbed at his casual yet intimate display of contact, now incredibly conscious of how close you were together, he probably does it for other people too. "I don't know if it's true or not," you said in between your bites, "but I heard Prof Sooyoung and your coach were a thing back in the day."

Jeno swallowed his bite. "Oh, they were. I think Haechan said that…" the rest of the night was filled with gossips, anecdotes and small laughers shared between the two of you with you gasping and lightly hitting him on the arm

"The last fry," you picked up the singular fry and waved it like a trophy, "you should have the honour because you just introduced me to my new favourite place."

"Wow, this is such an honour," a light sarcastic remarked from Jeno.

"Here you go," you held it in front of him but he didn't take it from you.

He looked at the golden fry and then at you, "feed it to me," his signature eye smile twinkled.

You playfully rolled your eyes, but you let him take the bite from your hand and he did it without dropping his eye contact on you. There was a beat of silence in the thickened air - and it wasn't just the smell of grease - you cleared your throat, "I need to wash my hands," and got up to go to the bathroom. There were no tissues inside the bathroom so you left your hands wet, because let's be real, you would rather have wet hands than use the hand dryer, ew.

Jeno washed his hands in the bathroom but he just wiped them on his pants. He noticed your wet hands and got up from his seat, "be right back," he went up to the counter and grabbed a couple of tissues.

"Hey Jeno," a guy entered with a couple of his friends dapped Jeno up. "What are you doing here?"

"Hey, just grabbing a late night meal with my girlfriend." Oh. The word was foreign to him but he didn't hate the way it came out of him. Jeno reciprocated the handshake, it took him a second but he recognised that the person as the guy who occasionally plays basketball with Chenle and he had asked Jeno to be his model for his portrait back then but Jeno turned it down because Chenle asked him first. "How about you, Keeho?"

"Yeah, fresh off the court," he imitated a whooshing sound and threw an invisible basketball in front of him, "yo, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Can you be in my film assignment?"

"Sorry Keeho, yn already asked first." Jeno apologised apathetically.

"Oh." Keeho glanced at you who was sitting at the booth by yourself, "ok."

"See you around Keeho," and Jeno left with a stack of tissues in his hands and went to you. Without a word, he took your damp hands and wiped them with gentle care. You sat there wordlessly but let Jeno do his thing. "All done," a faint smile spread on his lips.

"Tha-thank you, Jeno." A bit embarrassed and shy that Jeno did that for you despite the fact that you were more than capable of doing it. "I could've done it myself."

"Yeah, but I wanted to do it," he hummed.

At that moment, Keeho and some of the other guys walked by with a gigantic bowl of delicious ice cream. Your mouth salivated at the sweet assortments on it even though you already had your milkshake. "Do you want dessert?"

"Not really into sweets but we can if you want." Jeno replied.

"Oh," the corner of your lips frowned at his response. "No, I don't want it."

"Are you sure?" Jeno asked as he saw the visible changed in your mood.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Let's go back." The sparkling night sky blanketed the deserted parking lot with only a couple of dimly lit streetlights that decorated the lot. Jeno's humongous yet sleek motorbike shone under one of the streetlight and curiosity got the better of you. "Can you teach me how to ride your motorbike?"

He hissed at your question, "this bike is not exactly beginner friendly."

"Oh, please!" You put your hands together and begged him but he still shook his head. Then, you grabbed his hands and swung it side to side. "Please, please, please?" You fluttered your eyes at him.

He gulped his throat at your insistence and his heart skipped a beat, almost persuaded by your swaying. "No, it could be dangerous."

"Please, the parking lot is empty," you begged some more.

"Still, the bike-" He laced your hands in his and circled patterns on it.

You frowned in disappointment and tried to let go of his hands but he held onto it. "Fine then, I guess getting hit in the head was good enough." You touched your head and winced out a fake pain.

He laughed, "how long are you going to milk this?"

"Till you teach me how to ride your bike."

"Fine then," he admitted defeat and you cheered, "you're lucky you're pretty," he whispered to himself. "But you have to listen to me, it's for your own good," he reminded you in a " I mean business" voice.

"Sir, yes sir," you saluted Jeno with an upright body.

He playfully rolled his eyes at you. "Ok, helmet first no matter." He put on the protective gear on you and tightened it up. "Now, we can start."

Without a second to spare, you huddled in the front while Jeno stood to the side and started the engine. "This is brake and this is the accelarator,"and showed the two different handles on either side of the bar. "Pull down on this clutch and place your foot on the shifter," he gently directed your limbs to where you needed to go. "Just give the accelerator a bit of a boost and lean in the direction you want to go, like riding a bike, got that?" He asked you.

"Got it." You gave him a thumbs up, nervous yet excited to drive the exotic vehicle.

"Be careful, ok?" He asked you once more before he let go.

"Ok, here I go." The motorbike moved at a snail's pace and the motorbike jerked when you gave it a boost but you kept on going like Jeno said, "ah!"

"You're good, just keep on going!" It was a freeing feeling to be one with the wind!

"Don't go too fast!" Jeno reminded as he watched you go in circles in the empty parking lot.

You felt more confident with the motorbike and boosted it faster around the empty parking lot. "This is so much fun!" You smiled happily when you felt the cold breeze against your face. "How do I stop?"

"Slow down and come to me." He guided you towards him and you followed his directions. Once you were near him, Jeno shifted the gears and switched off the engine for you. "How was it?"

"Exhilarating!" You commented with a bright beamed on your face. "Can I drive back?" There was a glow of excitement on your face. "I think I can handle this."

"Babe, you don't have a license and I'm not about to get in trouble for this." You frowned but Jeno gave in when he saw your sullen expression. "Fine, maybe when we're on campus and near the dorm, then you can drive." Jeno took over the front seat as you scooted to the back and hugged his waist in a tight embrace - you were his backpack.

There was a new profound appreciation now that you knew how challenging it was to ride a motorbike and how Jeno effortlessly slips inbetween cars and traffic. Just as Jeno promised, once your dorm building was within your viewshot, you took over while Jeno sat at the back. Your stomach flipped when Jeno pulled you into his embrace from the back. "First time in this position," he commented. You recalled his earlier lesson and drove back to your dorm, more confident and smoother than your first time.

"We're here princess." You joked and stopped the vehicle in front of your dorm building, Jeno switched off the engine from behind you and kicked the stand into place.

Jeno got off from the bike first and then lifted you off the motorbike with one hand. "Thank you for driving me home," he played along and his eyes twinkled as he took off the helmet for you, his fingers lingering a second too long on your hair.

   There was something missing in all the videos you've shot; you compiled all the footages you've made so far and organised them in chronological order according to your script on your laptop. Your fingers tapped on the table as you watched the videos one more time. It was good so far but there was no umph element to capture the audience's interest. You groaned out loud in the empty dorm room by yourself.

It was a Friday night, meaning Jeno had another match tonight. Sungchan's girlfriend, Shuhua, had invited you to sit join and watch the game with them, only to be met with a disappointed yet understanding sighed when you said you were never going to any of his games ever again. Even your friends including Ryujin and Yeji went out to watch the game tonight. You checked the time and the tournament hadn't started yet so you called him on your phone and waited for him to pick up the call. Even though you've never been to any of his games ever since you two became a "couple," you fell into a natural routine of texting or calling him before he started his game to wish him luck.

The phone rang a couple of times, "hey," he spoke a little bit out of breath, presumably just finished warm up.

"Hey! Is the game starting soon?" Your tone naturally perked up brighter upon hearing his voice.

"Soon. Was just warming up." The rhythm of his tone went back to normal. "Why? Are you coming?" He asked in a hopeful tone.

"Hmm, no, I'm not coming. I have to review the footage we have so far." Your tone was slightly down.  

What's wrong?" He noticed your sullen tone over the phone. "Do we need to reshoot anything? I can squeeze sometime next week." He offered without even you asking for it.

"No, the scenes are perfect." You exhaled an exhausted sigh. "But somethings missing, there's no hook to reel people in." You placed your head down sideways on your desk and laid your phone on your ear.

"Well, what are others doing for their hook?" Even though his voice was still audible, the chatter and hollering in the background grew louder.

"My friend's doing something with toxic love so she's hooking them in with a makeout session."

"Well, sex always sells." He absentmindedly commented.

You lifted your head off the desk and held your phone in your hand again as an idea popped in your head when Jeno said that. "Jeno, can I see you after the game?" You asked in the sweetest voice you could muster.

"Uhm, sure, I'll drop by after the ga-" He answered with a bit of uncertainty since you had never asked to see him right after the game.

"No, I'll come to you!" You quickly inserted. "Please don't change out of your uniform by the way."

"Don't change out of my uniform?" Jeno was puzzled with your request but it seemed simple and innocent enough.

"Yes! Good luck Jeno!" You wished him luck.

You couldn't tell but he had a smile on his face. "Thanks, see you after the game."

From your previous experiences of going to a hockey game, you knew how long a game took and how much longer for the audience to dispersed from the arena, so you timed it perfectly that by the time you arrived at the arena, you only saw Jeno who lazily drifted the puck with his stick by himself.

"Is it safe for me to come in?" You barely raised your voice but the empty arena echoed your question.

All you heard was a hearty laughter from him, "yeah, come on in, babe." The casual mentioned of the pet name when no one was around made butterflies swirled around in your tummy. Oh, this was so going in the diary. You descended down the metal stairs of the arena until you reached Jeno who was still in his stakes on the ice rink. The stick and puck were safely tucked away, only him and the goal post were on the frozen ground.

"Hi! How was the game?" You greeted him from the dry area.

"It was good, we won." He greeted you with his signature eye smile, "also hi." He took your hand with his gloved one and carefully held onto it. You were face to face with each other and could see his drenched, flat hair and sweat that dripped on his temples; a complete contrast to your sweat-free appearance. A comfortable stretched over the atmosphere but you grew shyer when you felt Jeno's never ending intense gaze on you.

"Is the locker room empty by the way?" You asked to direct your shyness somewhere else.

"The locker room?" Jeno tilted his head to the side because he was still unsure of your plans.

"Yeah, I wanna film in the locker room."

"Oh, ok, sure, the boys are changing though." He replied without wavering his eye contact on you. "Give it a couple of minutes, they'll leave. Do you want to skate while we wait?" He asked with a hint of excitement in his tone.

"Sure, but it's been so long since I last skated." You nodded your head at him.

He chuckled as he got off from the icy floor to the dry, may area with his skates on and grabbed an extra pair of skates from behind one of the chairs. Then, he walked back to you and guided you to the chair. Even though he was still padded up with all his gear, with much difficulty, he bent down on one knee and laced up the pair of ice skates on you. "All done," he beamed up at you with an eye smile on his face.

You held onto Jeno's hand while you cautiously stepped on the frozen ground. The sharpness of the blade slipped, which made you wobbled but you were holding onto Jeno so you didn't fall. Jeno took off his gloves and dumped it somewhere, he then grabbed your cold, soft hands with his warm ones and skated backwards. The skates on your feet glided with ease as he dragged you around the rink with two hands; your feet grew familiar with the rhythm of the skates and you eventually let go of Jeno's hands and glided on your own. "I'm doing it!" You cheered brightly and Jeno mirroed the same smile as he continued skating backwards.

"Show off," you teased him when he effortlessly skated in circles around you while you skated at a slow pace.

Jeno simply laughed and continued to prey around you. "Let's race," he whispered beside your ear which left a tingling sensation in your body.

"Wanna bet?" You confidently proposed.

"Loser buys winner a drink?" He suggested.

"Deal, give me a head start." You weren't going to back down from a race even though it was your first time skating in forever.

"Is ten seconds good enough?" He positioned himself beside you.

"More than enough to beat you." You replied with a cocky attitude and steadied yourself next to him.

"From this end to the goalpost," he pointed to the goalpost on the other side of the rink.

"Got it." The distance was doable enough for you and you had deluded yourself into thinking you might even win because Jeno was giving you a head start.

"Ready, set, go." His skates were planted to the ice whereas you instantly dashed off from your starting position.

"One," Jeno counted down the seconds till it was his turn to dash off.

"Two," shoot! You weren't even a quarter way from your initial position - your pace was slower than you intended.

"Three," you gradually gained traction and you were skating with the ice and not against it.

"Four," almost halfway there! You looked back and Jeno had a proud smile with his eyebrows raised at you.

"Five," halfway there! You were practically gliding and tried to keep up with the momentum.

"Six," the goalpost was now clearer in view.

"Seven," you attempted to slow down your skates but was too scared at the speed you were going. Should've learned how to stop first!

"Eight," your eyes widened when you saw just how close the the metal goalpost was and tried to stop the skates like you've seen the way players do it but failed to replicate it and your knees wobbled.

"Nin-shit," Jeno finally caught on that you were most likely going to crash into the metal goalpost at the speed you were going, and he wasn't going to let you injure yourself under his watch, not again, and zoomed towards you within milliseconds, snatched you by the waist and turned you around so his back was facing the goalpost and was able to stop just a few inches short from the goalpost. "Got you," he whispered as his chest heaved up and down, his eyes flickered to your lips then to your eyes and so did yours. Both of your heads tilted closer to each other, a breath's away from a kiss, when the locker room door banged loudly against the empty arena.

"Oh! Someone's girlfriend is here!" Mark hollered when he spotted the two of you on the rink. You jolted away from Jeno's touch as more of his teammates exited the locker room.

"Awww!" Serim gushed at the sight of you two looking all lovey dovey. "What a cute couple!"

"He's so whipped!" Sungchan yelled.

"He was crying because she wasn't here!" Haechan evilly cackled.

You took a step back from Jeno as heat crawled up the back of your neck from embarrassment, while Jeno's ears turned red from the watchful eyes of his teammates.

"Don't get nasty guys! We all use the locker room." Haechan chortled followed by a chorus of boisterous laughter.

Jeno noticed a discomforted expression on your face and yelled back at them, "shut up." The guys only cackled like evil witches and even stuck out their tongue at Jeno before they hurriedly exited out the premise. They knew that Jeno knew that they were only brave enough to tease him like that because he couldn't physically get to them.

"Sorry about them, they're just weird like that," Jeno apologised sheepishly. "On the bright side, the locker room's free now." He remarked now that the whole arena was quiet again.

The embarrassment and shyness slowly faded away and was replaced with a playful glint in your eyes once you saw how close you were to the goalpost. "Ok," you replied and pretended to head to the exit but instead dashed for the goalpost. "I won!" You cheered happily and waved your hands in the air. "You have to buy me a drink!"

"You cheated!" Jeno's jaw dropped in disbelief but his eyes gleamed at your attitude.

"You're just jealous because I beat the star player at his own game," you patted his back in a pitiful way and glided away to the exit, leaving him by himself.

Jeno scoffed and poked his tongue out against his cheek before he quickly caught up to at the exit. Once again, he held your hands as he guided you to the chair and untied your skates first before he did his - the butterflies made an appearance in your stomach all over again over this simple action. Afterwards, Jeno brought you to the locker room when the mustiness and putrid scent of fresh sweat assaulted your nose. "Ugh," you pinched your nose. "Men smell."

"You get used to it." Jeno snickered in amusement. "So, what are we doing here?"

Right! Filming! "We're going to film the hook scene here in the locker room." You switched on the camera and played around with the angles and lighting to get the perfect view.

"Of…?" He trailed off as he stood there waiting for further instructions.

You cleared your throat for a second and answered in a soft voice, a contrast to your cocky attitude earlier. "Of you taking off your clothes," you pretended to fiddle around with the buttons and angles of the camera and refused to look him in the eyes.

Jeno offered a mischievous grin, "doll, you know you could've just asked me for a picture and I would've given it to you." you were avoiding his eye contact but his eyes followed your gaze everywhere you went. Cute. "You don't have to pretend it's for the assignment."

"It is for the assignment!" You insisted and met his gaze head on. "I need something to lure in the audience."

"Hmm," he hummed while he stroked his chin with a permanent smirk stiched on his face, "or you just wanted a topless video of me." He suggested in a raspy tone.

You shook your head at him, "it's for the assignment, it's the same thing you did for Chenle for his anatomical portrait."

Jeno's eyes scrutinised you with suspicions,"how do you know about the portrait?" The portrait assignment was a few semesters back for an elective class of Chenle's and he begged on his knees for Jeno to be his model, and Jeno agreed if it was only seen by the professor.

"He showed it to everyone." Chenle didn't show it to everyone, he accidentally left his sketchbook opened and you saw the page with Jeno's portrait on it, and maybe you snapped one or two pictures of it. Maybe.

"Wow, I need to have a word with him." He frowned slightly at the information given.

Oh crap! Did you just get Chenle in trouble? "He was just proud of it, no need to hound him about it," you awkwardly laughed. "Now, let's get started. All you need to do is take off your gear like normal, like I'm not even here," you explained the hook scene to him.

"How can I not notice a pretty girl with a camera pointing right at me?" He muttered too low for you to hear, but prepped himself in front of the locker while you started recording. The easy part was shedding of his jersey first, then protective gears off his shoulders and knee pads, until he was left with a tight compression shirt that hugged him deliciously and made his pecs stand out even more. From there on, you moved the camera closer to him and waited for him to rip off, take off, the shirt. Jeno made a show of tilting his head back as he took off his shirt, revealing the ridged abs that glistened under the fluorescent light. You took the time to film his body from his pecs all the way down to his faint happy trail. For the assignment.

"All done." You stopped filming since you were more than satisfied with the footage you had recorded. "Thanks Jeno! I'll wait outside while you get ready."

"Wait!" He caught your wrist before you could leave the locker room, "I know you said you won't ever go to my games ever again and I get it," he let go of your wrist and opened his locker to take a fresh and clean hockey jersey with the number "23" on it - Jeno's jersey. "If you ever change your mind one day, this is for you."

Ever since that day, something had shifted. Texts between you and Jeno usually consisted of "hi, are you free to film?" and a variation of "yes" or "no." Now? Jeno took the liberty to text you random questions about your day and when you asked him about his? He sent pictures to you: pictures of his food, pictures of him in class, pictures of him at practice, pictures of him shirtless at the gym, and pictures of him shirtless in bed. It left you flabbergasted when his texts became increasingly revealing and slightly more on the flirtier side but not once did he mentioned those shirtless pictures of him in bed whenever you two met up; he never acted differently towards you and kept it light and breezy.

   "Where's your girlfriend?" Chenle mocked Jeno while he's sprawled all over Jeno's bed, scrolling on his phone.

Meanwhile, Jeno laid on the floor with his arm behind his head, scrolling through pictures of you when a text from a girl he had been seeing popped up, im so stress rn. "Working on her assignment," he replied in a bored tone.

"Yo, when's your movie done? Can't wait to watch it with the boys." Haechan spun around in Jeno's computer chair.

Jeno closed his eyes for a second before replying to Haechan. "It's not a movie, it's an assignment and we're still not done filming." Another text came in, come over n work out my knots. "I think she's working on editing some of the parts right now."

"Whatever, can't wait for it either way." Haechan geeked out.

u know where to find me

"I didn't know she edits." Chenle commented absentmindedly.

Otw rn, was the only response he gave and got up from the floor. He reached for his hoodie and leather jacket off his closet then grabbed his helmet and keys. "Ah, she said someone else is helping her with the editing part."

"Cool. Who?"

"I don't know. Later guys," Jeno opened the door in a hurry to step out but Chenle's question stopped him.

"Oh come on, if she's your girlfriend you must know who's helping her with the editing. That's boyfriend 101." Chenle remarked.

He furrowed his eyebrows and tried to remember the name, "some person named Bae something."

"Bae Jinyoung?" Chenle shrieked.

"Yeah, I think that's the one." Jeno replied with no thought with one foot out the door. "You know him?"

Chenle scoffed. "Do I know the person on campus with the sexiest thighs? Hell yeah, I do."

"And he always looks like he just basked in the sweet sun with that tan of his." Haechan whistled out loud.

Jeno slowly retreated his foot back from the door. "So you guys do know him?"

"Yeah, super good looking and super nice." Haechan remarked.

"It's quite late, but don't worry, you can trust that guy." Chenle commented. "Good thing she's dating you because I would be worried if she was single," he threw Jeno a cheesy wink.

"Yeah, he's got a certain charm, we should hang out more with him." Haechan commented.

Sungchan stepped into the room with his duffle bag. "'Sup guys, what's happening?" and dropped his huge bag without a thought.

"Bae Jinyoung." Chenle said.

"Great guy." Sungchan commented. "We paired up for an elective and he got me hooked with content creation. What about him?"

"Bae Jinyoung is helping Jeno's girl with her video." Haechan explained.

"She's in good hands then." He clicked his tongue. Jeno's stomach churned at the comments, he glanced down at the phone when his phone flashed a topless picture but now that was the furthest thing from his mind. What if you fell in love with Bae Jinyoung? So what? You were free to see other people if you wanted to and so was he but why did it hurt at the thought of you with someone else? Why does it…Jeno shook his head and stopped himself from that train of thought. You guys were friends and friends can check up and care about each other, right?

"Why do you look sad bro?" They all asked him as a sullen expression shadowed his face.

Jeno left the room without an explanation. He jumped on motorbike and let the vehicle lead him to you; he remembered you mentioning that you were going to be in the media room to work on the video. Listen, he has no idea where the hell the media room but no rooms will be left unopened.

Why was there more than one media room? The university was built like a maze and he thought he had hit the jackpot when he found the Media Room, apparently, the entire building was the Media Room? What the fuck?

Two bodies slouched over the screen together, analysing the same footage over and over again, turned their attention towards the door when it creaked opened to a sweaty Jeno. "Jeno?" You whispered, a bit concerned at Jeno's sudden appearance.

"You ok, dude?" Bae Jinyoung asked.

Despite the fact it was late at night, the Media Room was brightly lit under the fluorescent light, with soft music playing from someone else's computer since there were also other people working in the same area since anyone was welcomed to to use the facility. You and Jinyoung were huddled in front of a computer, side by side, with hands to yourself. It was obvious you guys had been doing this for awhile because some of your notebooks were scattered on the computer desk. For some strange reason, a wave of relief went through Jeno's body, he wasn't sure what he was expecting but the guys made it sound so bad that he had to come and check up on you. Just in case. He cleared his throat and offered a light smile, "yeah, I'm good."

"What are you doing here? It's late." You asked while he pulled up a chair and snugged it in between yours and Jinyoung's and manspreaded his legs.

"Craving a midnight snack," he asked, "you guys want anything? My treat." He took out his phone and scrolled through the food delivery app.

"Sure man," Jinyoung replied, "Jinyoung," he extended his hand to Jeno.

"Jeno," and they did their little brofist hand shake thingy that every men knows about despite meeting for the first time, "yn's boyfriend."

You cocked your head a bit at his odd behaviour but didn't say anything about it. "You could've just ordered from you dorm?"

"My room was invaded," Jeno responded with a simple answer and hung his arm over the back of your chair. He checked out the food after you and Jinyoung added your meals to the cart. "So, what do we have here?"

"In the middle of editing, let me show you." Jinyoung went on a passionate and detailed talk on the editing process and you chimed in with your thoughts here and there, while Jeno followed your discussion at first but later zoned out as he traced the several lines on your palm - from your wrist to your fingertips.  His line of sight ended right on Jinyoung's thick and muscular thighs which was visible even under those denim jeans. Damn, he does have sexy thighs.

"Wait yn, what kind of effect did you want for this scene?" Jinyoung asked you.

"Sorry, wait, it's easier for me to show you, I have visual references in my notebook." You took out your notebook one by one, including your small diary, from your bag because the notebook you were looking was deep within the bag. "Here it is!" And you showed the visual references to Jinyoung.

A buzzing sound interrupted the discussion you guys were having, someone was calling Jinyoung. "Sorry, my girlfriend's calling, be right back." Jinyoung excused himself out of the room.

"Are you sure you're comfortable Jeno?" Your soft breath in Jeno's ear tingled him just a bit. "Theres a couch if you want to lie down." Within five minutes of you and Jinyoung working on the video, you noticed how Jeno tuned out of your conversation and played with your hands instead.

"I'm good." He pinched your cheek as he stroked your hands in his, which made you shy on the inside. "Food's almost here, be right back."

"Wait, let me go with you. I need a break either way," you got up from your seat and shoved your notebooks and other things that were on the computer desk in your bag and left the room with Jeno without realising that your small diary didn't make it to your bag, instead, it fell underneath a computer desk.

   The worst part of being a woman was the period cramps. Well, aside from the fear of interacting with an unknown male individual and unknowingly triggering its fragile male ego and fearing for your life but that's neither here nor there. It was like a sharp knife stabbed you right in the tummy and twisted the insides till you died a thousand small deaths only for you to relive the experience it all over again. Hence, you and Ryujin laid on your bed as you ate chocolates and watched a classic romcom on the laptop, giggling and squealing at the cliche parts, while the heating pad on your belly eased your mind and body from the period cramp. All the small talks in between the giggling while you watched the movie almost made you miss the knock on your window.

"Did you hear that?" You asked Ryujin because you were sure you heard something knocked but you only heard the stretched of the indoor wind.

"Nope, I don't he-" Knock, knock. Your body shivered when you heard the knock from somewhere again. There it was again. Both you and Ryujin looked at each other but stayed completely still until a familiar voice spoke behind the window.

"Are you awake? It's me, Jeno." A voice spoke out behind the window. You slumped your shoulders and headed to the window to open it. Your heart fluttered at the sight of Jeno with his black hoodie and a duffel bag that slung over his shoulders. It had been awhile since you last saw Jeno because you had gotten busy with other assignments and Jeno with practice and his away games over the weekends.

"What are you doing here this late at night?" You leaned closer to him.

Instead of responding with a "hi" or a "hello," Jeno cupped your face in the palm of his hands and kissed you on the lips. His lips were soft, although a bit dry, but it had that addicting taste which you couldn't get enough of. Was that your first kiss with him? You didn't realised how much you actually missed him because you chased his lips even deeper and was lost in his touch.

"Ahem-ahem," Ryujin loudly faked coughed to get both of your attention. She had never seen you like this with a guy.

Your lips separated from each other but Jeno gave you one last peck. "You taste like chocolate." He commented, his eyes drowned in yours.

"Just ate some," you bit your lips from the way he looked at you.

"Ahem-ahem," Ryujin faked coughed again while her arms were crossed as she tapped her foot against the floor. "Jeno."

"Ryujin." He finally acknowledged Ryujin's presence and gave her a slight nod.

"Ever heard of texting?" She rolled her eyes but was severely relieved that it was just Jeno and not some sort of psycho by the window. It was truly one of the disadvantages of staying on the ground floor of the building.

"Wanted to surprise her." He tucked a locked of your hair behind your ear and pinched your cheek which made heat crawled up your neck. "Wanna go for a ride? We can drop by the diner." He asked as he played with your hand.

You pouted. "Sorry Jeno, not tonight. I'm not feeling well."

Jeno's hand instinctively went to your forehead to feel your temperature. "Your body feels normal," he commented after a few seconds but his hand remained on your forehead.

You chuckled lightly, "it's my period cramps," you took his hand that was on your forehead and guided it to your lower abdomen.

"Does it still hurt?" Jeno pressed a bit of pressure on it as he massaged in a circular pattern.

A small moaned came out of you when you felt the pressure of Jeno's fingers on your lower abdomen. "Yeah, but I'll get over it." It sucked but it was routine at this point.

"Let me help you." He continued massaging you through the window.

You held his hand that was massaging you and stopped him, "you don't need to, I have heating pads for it."

"I want to," he pouted at you. It was hard to draw a line with him if he was being this nice. "Please," he begged and kissed your knuckles.

"I have to ask Ryujin first. We have this "No Boys" in the room policy." You subtly glanced at Ryujin.

Ryujin heard the entire thing and sighed. "Just stay but no funny business!" She warned Jeno and gave him a menacing side-eye. "You're lucky I have to finish up my assignment." She went to her study table across from yours, put on her headphones and dived into her laptop.

"Thanks," Jeno smiled at Ryujin's response and jumped in through the window, all while he held your hand. He took off his duffel bag from his shoulders and placed it down on the floor. "Movie night?" He commented when he saw the paused scene on the laptop screen on your bed.

"Yeah, makes me forget about the pain." You moved the laptop and sat on your bed; Jeno mirrored your action and sat beside you but pulled you on his lap and wrapped you in his arms. One hand was on your lower abdomen and massaged it like he did before. "What movie do you want to watch?" You pulled your laptop in your lap and scrolled through the categories.

"Any." He leaned back against your headboard and drew you in between his legs as he massaged you, while you picked a random movie to watch and let it play in the background. His fingers kneaded you right where you needed them and eased up your cramps. "How's this?" He whispered in the shell of your ear.

"Better," you hummed a contended sighed. "When did you get back?" Your back leaned even more to his chest.

"Just now." He continued to massage your lower abdomen with both hands.

You let out a confused sound and looked at him. "Aren't you tired? Heard the place was quite far."

There was a faint smile on his face, "slept on the bus." He kissed the side of your temple and muttered, "besides, I missed you."

With that simple action, your heart skipped a beat at the casualness of it all. Your once bitter feelings for him disappeared when he was around. The both of you stayed like that for awhile, tangled in each other's arms while you guys watched the movie. Although Jeno's massage did help you a bit, the pain was still present and persistent. Like you needed something heavy to squash it down. "Jeno, it still hurts." You mumbled against his chest.

"Hm?" He leaned in closer to hear you better. "Still? Do you want aspirin?"

"No," you shook your head. "I just need something to sit on top of it. I think my textbooks might work." You lifted yourself Jeno but he didn't let you go fetch your heavy textbooks.

"What if I lay on top of you?" He asked. "Think it would work?"

"We can try." So, you switched positions with Jeno in between your legs, his body heat and weight radiated off him and helped eased the period cramps. Meanwhile, you ran your fingers through his hair and threaded it and scratched it as the faint noise played in the background.

When you woke up the next morning, it felt cold to no longer have the warm presence that was on you; the warmness from Jeno and the coziness of your bed lulled you to sleep and you didn't even realised you dozed off in the middle of watching the movie. You stretched out your limbs and yawned, your muscles and body were already feeling much better today compared to yesterday, and went to grab your water bottle on your desk. There was your laptop laid neatly on your desk, you assumed Jeno had switched it off and placed it there before he left, with a sticky note on it. Sorry, had to leave without telling u, didn't want to disturb ur sleep. Call me when u wake up - Jeno.

Your emotions swirled at the simple message he left behind and you bit back a giggle because Ryujin was still asleep in her bed. You were too busy gushing and rereading his note again and again that you didn't realised there was a new poloroid picture of the said note leaver on your board which you did not put up.

   There was only one bed. A decent sized queen bed, nevertheless, it was only one bed. "Um - there's only bed." You pointed out to Jeno.

"Yeah." He replied without looking and settled down the bags on the floor, and shrugged of his jacket.

It was easy to avoid relationship questions for one night, but to avoid it over the whole weekend was impossible. Jeno's hockey team arranged a staycation at a villa a couple of hours away from campus to strengthen their bond and unwind for a weekend. Even though it was a team gateaway, it was also an excuse for most of them to bring their girlfriend or whoever they wanted on the trip with them.

 "Is there any room with two beds?" You sat your half empty iced peach lemon tea on the side table. "Someone we can switch with?" You asked him.

He chuckled, "I think that would raise suspicions, don't you think?"

"Oh." You clamped your mouth shut when Jeno pointed that out.

"All the rooms in the villa only have a king-sized bed or a queen-sized one." Jeno elaborated.

It was a gorgeous and fun villa by the beach and there was an indoor pool, a hot tub, a gaming room filled with arcade games, a pool table, a tennis table, a gorgeous kitchen with an outdoor kitchen and fire pit outside.

"Woah, you guys can afford this?"

"It's one of Chenle's vacation house." Jeno commented. "He was going to join but then he has last minute rehearsals for his play."

The rest of the day was filled with the whole team exploring the local town and you all came back and played in the gaming room. Everyone was spread out either competing in different games while you teamed up with Jeno for the table tennis doubles match.

"Woah! Let's go!" You exclaimed when Haechan and Chaeryeong missed another one of your shots.

Jeno high-fived you with the paddle, "you're going down Lee," which ignited a whole level of competitive spirit for Haechan and Chaeryeong but it sucked for them because you and Jeno were on fire and easily won the game.

"Rematch!" Haechan yelled out of dissatisfaction.

The heated match had left everyone hungry and tired so by the time the sun had set, all the guys were grilling the meats outside in the cold, while you and the rest of the girls were in the kitchen preparing the drinks and some snacks while gossiping. You had rarely crossed paths with them before you became Jeno's "girlfriend," but they were all super sweet and welcomed you like you were always part of them.

"We never see you at the games." Shuhua frowned as she stirred in the random juice concoction that she made.

You felt heat crawled up to your neck as all the girls' attention were on you. "I don't go to his games."

"Oh yeah, trauma, forgot those existed." Shuhua jokingly hit her head and you laughed.

"You know Jeno's always looking for you." Chaeryeong piped up while she cut up some fruits. "You should join us one day, we'll protect you," and fed you some fruits.

Was he waiting for you to show up to his games?

"By the way, how'd you get this guy to date?" Shuhua leaned in closer and so did all the other girls, interested in what magic you put him under to commit to a relationship.

Just then, Haechan, Serim and Jeno walked in with a tray full of smoked meats, "it's freezing cold out there," Haechan walked in to the kitchen all jumpy and blew warm air to his hands while Jeno and Serim set the tray full of meats down.

"It looks so good!" Chaeryeong's eyes bulged at the sight of meats and nimbled on one.

"Are you guys done grilling the meat?"

"There's still a lot more, wanted to give this to you girls first," Jeno stood next to you and fed you a piece of meat, "how is it?"

The smoky flavoured marinated really well with each other and the more you chewed it, there was a spicy after kick to it. "It's so good," and you gave him a thumbs up and fed you another piece once you were done with the first one.

"What were you guys up to?" Serim stole a piece of fruit.

"She was about to tell us how she got Jeno to date," Shuhua wiggled her eyebrows at you.

"You poisoned him or something?" Haechan jokingly suggested.

You decided to play it cool and nodded your head. "He took a sip of my secret potion, one taste and he was mine." You started off all serious and melancholic as if you were telling them your story, everybody was locked in to your story. "For a spell that can't be broken, one drop should be enough." You dramatically sighed and gazed at Jeno and held his chin with your thumb and index finger, his heart skipped a beat. "Boy, you belong to me."

Everyone including Haechan jumped in, "I got the recipe, and it's called black magic."

Everyone jumped up and down as they sang but Jeno, "take sip of a secret potion! One taste and you'll be mine! For a spell that can't be broken, it'll keep you up all night! Boy, you belong to me! I got the recipe! And it's called black magic!"

The first night ended on a high note with everyone joking and eating the delicious food, and everyone went to bed with a happy tummy. It was a bit awkward when you and Jeno were deciding on your sleeping arrangements since he's only ever helped you with your period cramps. Jeno was stubborn and insisted on sleeping the floor while you took the bed.

"Jeno, I'll sleep on the floor, you take the bed." You said with a concerned tone. "I know you have a tournament next week."

"It's nothing I'm not used to," he shrugged your concerned off and dozed off on the floor with the blanket. Maybe it was better this way because you think you would combust if you ended up sleeping with Jeno. At som point during the night, you got up from the bed to go to the bathroom and accidentally stepped on Jeno in the darkness of the room. "Oomf," Jeno grunted.

"Sorry Jeno," you apologised, not realising how close he was beside your bed. When you came back from the bathroom, you felt bad watching Jeno turn and twist in different directions on the hard floor even though there was a carpet underneath him to cushion the hardness. "Jeno, come to bed with me," you whispered in his ears.

He lazily shook his head with his eyes closed. "It's fine," he muttered.

"No you're not. I don't want you to be in pain because of me." You replied in a worried tone and held his hand. "Please," you begged him.

"Ok," his hushed tone carried loud enough in the darkness of the room. He got up from the floor with his blanket and laid down on the right side of the bed while you slept on the other - respectable distance between the two of you.

"Night Jeno," you turned the other way, so he can't see you ugly sleep your way through the night.

"Night doll," he settled in comfortably.

The morning sun seeped through your eyelids and your eyes fluttered open. You tried to get up but you felt a heavy and warm presence wrapped around you; Jeno's face was nuzzled in the crook of your neck you and his arms and legs were tightly sprawled all over you - bringing you even closer when he felt you moved. "Um, Jeno," you whispered not wanting to disturb him from his slumber but you just wanted to get up from the bed, "are you awake?" You asked Jeno who had his eyes closed.

"Hmmm," he groaned and pulled you in even tighter. Your eyes widened in shyness when you felt his morning wood buldged on your ass. What the heck?!

"Jeno," you whispered one more time in hope that he would wake up, "can you please let go of me?"

"Five more minutes," he mumbled with his eyes closed and inhaled the scent of your skin as you accepted defeat and melted back into a deep slumber.

You weren't sure how long you fell asleep for but it didn't matter because it was definitely one of the best sleep you had gotten in awhile. You chuckled when you found that Jeno was wrapped like a burrito, still asleep, and you realised all those late afternoon replies to your morning messages made sense - he was a deep sleeper. So you went off and washed up, had your first meal of the day, and Shuhua invited you to come along with her and Sungchan, since everyone already left the house to explore more of the local town, but you declined and told her you would meet up with them later with Jeno once he was awake.

You made your way back to yours and Jeno's shared room, expecting for him to still be asleep, only to be greeted with him fresh from the shower with only a towel that hung dangerously low on his waist.

"Morning sleepyhead," he greeted you with a smile as he dried his hair with a small towel.

Your eye shifted here and there before you decided to narrow in on his ear - yeah, that would be a good spot. "Morning sleepyhead," you lightheartedly mocked him. "They all went out to town by the way, told Shuhua and Sungchan that we would meet them there." Yeah, keep it cool girl.

"Ok, I'll get ready and then we can head there together. I think Chenle has an atv somewhere, we can ride that if it's in good condition." Jeno rambled but you were my paying attention to his words anymore. Instead, your eyes wondered the deep lines of his abs and his juicy pecs paired up with his beefy biceps, yum!

Get your head out of the gutter! It was still hard for you to make eye contact with him considering how naked he was. Yes, you've seen him shirtless but he had pants on the last time you saw him like this! Who knows what's underneath that towel. Even through the thick material, you can vaguely make out the shape of his dick. How hung was this guy?

The corner of Jeno's lips tugged upwards as he wiped away a drool on your lips; he couldn't pretend to not notice the intensity of your stares anymore. "Take a picture, it'll last longer." He teased you and you could only feel the embarrassment of getting caught.

He smirked, "you can touch it if you want," and brought your hand over the hard ridges of his abs and didn't let go of it.

You followed his sightline and stopped at where his huge dick laid underneath the towel. "Wouldn't it be weird?"

He loosened his grip on your wrist but didn't let go of it. "It doesn't have to be," and laid your hand on line of his abs and let it rest there - waiting for you to make your choice.

Maybe it was all those repressed desires for Jeno because your fingers moved down by itself and played with the hems of the loose towel, while Jeno stood still with an amused expression on his face. You looked up at him with an uneased expression, only for Jeno to give a nod of encouragement. You gave the towel a little tug and it instantly fell on the floor, revealing his big, pink dick. Your jaw dropped at the mere size of it and its mushroom top while it laid all soft. "Can I touch it?" You whispered.

Jeno brought your hand to his cock and rubbed it up and down. "I'm yours to touch." You wrapped your hand around his warm dick and Jeno winced in pain. "Not too tight."

"Oops, sorry." You were intrigued with the way his cock was slowly hardening under your touch; the pink tip curved upwards and your eyes glinted with list.

"Spit on it." Jeno instructed. You gathered the saliva in your mouth and spat it all out on his warm dick. The slimy and wet sensation left Jeno feeling breathless. The tip of his dick looked appetising with the precum that leaked from the tip so you bent down on your knees and licked it and tasted the saltiness of the liquid on your tongue.

You sucked the tip in an agonising slow pace, savouring every single drop and moan that came out of Jeno. He tugged on your hair and pulled it back, "don't tease," he whined. There was a mischievous smirk as you wanted to see him break apart under your touch so you dragged your tongue down his dick and he could only hold on to your scalp in desperate agony. Your tongue trailed up and down, up and down his dick until you reached the tip and sucked it harsh again. Jeno moaned and inadvertently pushed his dick in deeper. So you loosened your jaw to accommodate his huge cock. Jeno went deeper and deeper till he was halfway down your throat. "Fuck, you're so warm, princess." He grunted and you breathed in to your nose but gagged out his dick when you couldn't take it anymore.

You panted heavily for oxygen while his cock stood tall and proud in front of you - you still needed more of him. "Fuck me." You begged.

He shook his head and grazed his thumb against the faint scar on the side of your forehead. "What if you get hurt?" He was concerned if your brain could handle his big dick.

"I'll pinch your thigh if it gets too much, that good enough for you?" Jeno inserted his cock in your mouth again, inch by inch he went deeper till you felt him in the base of your throat as you breathed in through your nose.

"Ready?" Jeno asked as he held your hair in a makeshift ponytail and you could only respond with a muffled yes. He went slow at first, his pace was gentle and his hold on your scalp was loose; he often glanced at you and checked if you were able to take it well since his pleasure was only second to your safety. Eventually you got tired of snail pace and muffled "faster," and that was when he punctured and abused your swollen throat at a fast pace while he groaned until streams of cum went down your throat and you swallowed every bit of it. There was a dark sense of pride as he watched you swallow his seeds. He helped you stand up and kissed you deep, tasting himself as you interlocked tongues. Your lips were swollen and you were out of breath and your pussy was wet and you continued kissing. "What a good girl for taking my big dick, even swallowed all of my cum." He nipped your lips, "wanted it from the beginning didn't you, baby?" And you could only nod as he sucked the air out of you.

"Let me return the favour."

   The memory of the villa burned inside of you for days on end. Jeno was true to his words and kept it casual; he didn't treat you any differently than before and would joke and tease you around like usual.

We're friends, I can call and text him if I want. So, you dialled his number and it rang.

"Hello?" Jeno's faint voice came out breathy.

"Hi Jeno." You greeted him.

"Hi princess, what's up?" You heard a woman's moan on the other end of the line and your heart dropped.

"Nothing." You quickly said. "Just wanted to see if you're free tomorrow to film."

"Yeah, I have some time tomorrow."

"Ok, I'll text you the location. Bye!" You ended the call without even letting a Jeno say goodbye and slummed your body against the bed. God, that call could've been a text, and now you actually have to go and write a small script for tomorrow's filming even though you had nothing! What an idiot! You really thought Jeno would fall for you when he was just a nice person, combined with the fact he probably still feels guilty for pucking you, but sure yeah, he has definitely fallen for you, what an idiot! Stupid! You really thought you were the one to change him like you are not Bob the builder.

The blank ceiling stared back at you in frustration. Now you understood why so many girls walked away crying in pain even though they knew what they signed up for; You already fell for him but you fell even more after you slowly got to know him. It frustrated you that you read more meaning into Jeno's actions even though Jeno had always been a man of his words. He told you up right that it was a simple transactional arrangement. It was dumb of you thinking that Jeno would ever fall for you. He was just a nice person. You cried into your pillows last night.

No, you can't fall for him no matter how kind and sweet he is. Him kissing you was a fluke. That night at the villa was a fluke. You were both two individuals with pent up emotions and urges who didn't hate each other hence the physical attraction at the very least. Don't fall for him, don't fall for him. That was the thing, you already fell for him, hard. Just…don't let him know about it.

The feelings bubbled intensely in your body that you had to let the foams out before it exploded. You reached for the diary in its usual spot but it wasn't there! You emptied every drawer, every bag, your closet, flipped the mattress, and even searched on Ryujin's side just in case it was there. That would be the best scenario. Oh crap! It was nowhere to be found! You cried so long that Ryujin and Yeji caught you crying and were ready to immediately beat Jeno's ass but quickly jumped to the rescue and said that you lost something.

   Jeno felt like a pervert, scratched that, he was a pervert. Right now, he was beating his meat while listening to a two second, innocent, voice recording of yours over and over again, while his game character hid in the corner of the screen, ignoring the whines and shouts through the chunky headset from his demonic friends. He had no idea how this became a regular occurrence; ever since meeting you, it became harder and harder for him to, well, get hard unless he thought about you. The post-nut clarity came and he had never felt more disgusted with himself, again. The logical side of his came back and it felt so wrong to disrespect you like this, especially since your relationship with him was far from that.

Whenever he was around you, he couldn't help that it was his natural instinct to constantly hold onto you, that his touches lingered longer, the need to playfully tease you, and maybe it was out of sheer stupidity, he sent risqué pictures to you. No, it wasn't nudes, simply topless pictures of him at the gym or in him in bed, and if that incited you to initiate something with him, well, he wouldn't be opposed to it. But you were good at keeping your boundaries - almost too good - there was a line he wanted to cross.

On some days, he wondered in the back of his mind if you were seeing anyone or sleeping with anyone else; the thought of that alone angered and enraged him in ways he didn't expect it to do so. Fuck whoever was touching and pleasing you. The first time that thought flashed his mind was when he saw a bruise on your neck when he first visited your dorm. There were times when a guy lingered his gaze on you for a second too long or you were friends with another guy, but he couldn't ask you that without him being a hypocrite. So, he did what any good boyfriend did - stared down the guy whenever someone looked at you the way he didn't liked.

Then it happened. The kiss when he came back from his away game. The texts and calls you made to wish him luck made him missed you even more, an empty hollow ache dug in his heart, even though he was tired from the game and the bus ride, his body instinctively led him to you. His heartbeat drummed when you opened the window, and without a thought, he cupped you in for a kiss on the lips - and the craziest thing was that you didn't push him away. You even leaned in for more. Well, that drove him a bit crazy.

Second, the villa. Maybe it was because you had to pretend to be a couple for the entire weekend, you naturally acted more couple-like. He loved getting a whiffed of your natural scent when you laid beside him and the warmth of your body against his when he woke up tangled in you - not wanting to leave the comfort of your presence. That memory replayed in his mind like background noise; if a simple kiss from you ruined him, just imagine what a kiss on his dick from you meant. Jeno tried to forget the touch of your soft lips on his with other people. Not because he wanted to forget about the memory but because his mind and body constantly crawled back to you. It was torturous to be toeing in between the lines. That was why he did what he had to do but tt felt wrong the moment another girl touched him and he instinctively jolted away from their touch. However, they were already naked so what else was he supposed to do beside eat her out so she can leave somewhat satisfied and that was when you made that odd phone call to him.

His eyes naturally wonders to you: the way your eyes light up when you drink your favourite iced peach lemon tea, the way you get shy and flustered when he teases you, the way you ride his motorbike with confidence when some of his friends were too scared to even ride in the back, the way you blend in with his friends and their girlfriends, and the way you're always so comfortable to be around that he feels like he can always be honest with you.

Once again, he notice you avoiding eye contact and being a bit colder than usual, your responses were curt and short - it reminded him of the time you avoided him the day after you got drunk. He hated it. At first, he choked it up to you having a bad day but it happened every time he met you, so he thought you were on your period but it wasn't possible because, according to his calnder, you weren't supposed to have it yet.

"Dude, you look sad." Mark observed Jeno's behaviour as they walked out of the arena.

"Yeah, you weren't hitting all the shots at practice today, what happened?" Serim asked.

"Nothing," he ran his fingers through his hair in frustration, "my girlfriend seems a bit down nowadays and I don't what to do."

"Well, have you tried asking her?" Mark asked him in an obvious tone.

"I did and she said she was fine."

"Wow, it's clear you've never been in a relationship," Serim scoffed at Jeno, "when a woman says she's fine, she's not fine."

"Or, she could actually be fine," Mark interjected, "depending on the situation."

"Yeah, that's true," Serim nodded.

"What? So is she fine or is she not fine?" Jeno asked, more confused than ever.

"Yes." They both answered.

"Whatever it is, it doesn't hurt to make her feel better and happier." Serim said.

"Like what?" Jeno asked.

"You know like show up with flowers and buy her favourite dinner." Mark brought up, "or take her to a special place."

The three of them went their separate ways once the main campus building was in view. Jeno mulled over his friends' advice and decided to follow through with it; he waited for you outside of your class with your favourite iced peach lemon tea in one hand, and a singular crochet flower in the other - he thought the crochet flower would look cute in your room. His palms grew sweaty but he forgot about it once he saw you walking out of your lecture hall, "hi babe," he beamed at you with his natural smile.

You pressed a firm line and gave him a slight smile, "hey, what are you doing here? We don't have filming today," you peeked down and noticed the items in his hands.

"Yeah, I know," a random guy dapped Jeno up and he shakily handed you the drink and the crochet flower.

"Thanks," you were hesitant but accepted it anyways and took a sip of your favourite drink while you put away the cute flower in your bag.

"Are you free right now?" Jeno quietly asked.

Your eyes wavered side to side, "uhm, I have assignments that needs to be done," and took another sip from your drink.

There it was again, the unfamiliar cold behaviour that was uncharacteristic of you. "Ah, ok," Jeno awkwardly shuffled his feet, he did not think it through.

"Is everything ok?" There was a slight concerned in your voice.

"Yeah, everything's fine, I just needed your help with something."

You took another sipped and bit your lips, "what do you need help with?"

"Come with me."

"What are we doing here?" You slipped in backstage of the auditorium and crouched down beside Jeno who was peeking out of the giant curtains.

"We have to keep our voices down," he gently shushed you.

"Why are we here? There's no one," you whispered.

"Sometimes when I know Haechan is rehearsing alone, I like to mess with him when I'm bored." Right on cue, Haechan showed up on stage from the other side and warmed up his voice. It was an empty auditorium with only a singular flash of light that shone on Haechan. Jeno waited until Haechan sang a song and was in his world and that was when he took out a small metronome from his bag. He set the metronome equipment down on stage and turned it on the setting to a beat behind Haechan's singing so it would drive him crazy with the small, clicking sound.

You watched the way Haechan fell into the rhythm of his own singing, completely in sync with himself until he stopped singing and looked around the place, wondering if he had heard something. There was nothing so he continued on but there was the sound again, completely threw him off. This happened a couple of times until he got agitated and yelled, "stop messing with me!" Whether it was a ghost or a person, he was so done with them because it only happened when he was alone. "I will find you."

"He's coming, run," he snagged your hand and ran before Haechan could catch either of you and tried so hard to muffle in your laughs as to not be caught. You stopped running now that you were safe from Haechan's wrath, a bit out of breath from the spontaneous sprint, "what was that?!" You laughed at Jeno's harmless prank on Haechan.

Jeno's eyes twinkled seeing you smile, "he's going to kill me if he ever finds out one day but it's Haechan so I can take him down."

"I'm not here if he ever kills you," you laughed while clutching onto your stomach. It took you a couple more seconds but the laughter finally died down. "Well, um, thanks for letting me on this but I have to go now."

Jeno's eyes widened as he interrupted you. "Let me take you somewhere!"

"I don't know Jeno," you looked down, "I-"

"Please," he carefully linked his pinky with yours, "it won't take long."

Why is it that all men ever do is lie because you wouldn't exactly define going to a park outside of campus as exactly short. But you can't say you hated it, in fact, you loved it because you both were paddling on a duck-shaped boat over the tranquil water when Jeno stopped at where all the ducks and swans gathered. He took out a huge bag of ziplock from his bag and sprinkled seeds at the ducks and swans nearby.

"Do you always carry a bag full of seeds?" Your eyes glinted with amusement as you watched all the little cute animals gathered around the seeds, pecking for more.

"Not always but often enough," he handed you the ziplock bag and it was your turn to sprinkle it around.

"So cute, Jeno look, it's coming to me," you drizzled a generous amount of seeds to them and Jeno did the same - you both watched in complete silence in the stillness of tranquility. "Why'd you bring me here?" A thought ran through your head.

"Honestly?" Jeno asked as he fed more seeds to them.

"Yeah, honestly." You repeated.

"You seem a bit down nowadays, and I don't want to overstep your boundaries, especially if it's personal and I'm probably not your go-to person. But I just wanted to share what I do when I feel down," he paused, "in hopes of helping you feel better, whatever it is you're going through, even if it's just a litttle bit."

"Hmm cool, is this where you bring other girls often?" You chuckled lightly to disguise the bitterness and sharpness of your tone.

Jeno shook his head, "it's my first time showing anyone that I come here," his soft tone swayed your heart. Jeno didn't know but the hardened wax you created around him melted once again under his sincere words.

Jeno was ultra-focused as he scored another goal and the whole crowd cheered for him but it always sounded bittersweet in his ears, especially since you were never around for his games. He scanned the crowd once more, in a silly little hope that he would you in his jersey, like all of his other teammates did with their girlfriends. There was a small inkling part of him that wished you would come to his games and watch you cheer from the stands. But he knew where you came from, he would never even step foot into the arena if it happened to him, and a small part of the guilt resided in him. The tensions were high, only one score left to determine the winner. Jeno clenched his jaw and gripped his stick, the puck flew across the rink from stick to stick. A quick glanced at his surroundings and he already knew which teammate to pass the puck to, in a swift move, Jeno slid the puck to Serim and Jeno instantly skated to the other side. He watched as his other teammates passed the pucked among themselves until it reached Jeno again -they were so close to goal. Jeno was about to strike his stick against the puck when he saw a familiar figure with his jersey and his number on it. Could it be…? It was you! You were cheering in the stand with Chenle and your other friends. The other team took this split second of hesitation to body check him and stole the puck, and they took the win.

The match ended and the crowd slowly dispersed from the arena. You went down to where the team was gathered and greeted Jeno, "sorry you lost, it's like I'm bad luck." You checked him for any injuries and he let's you; Jeno liked it when your attention was on him and loved the feel of your soft fingers on him even more and your concerned tone.

"You're not bad luck, I need to play better." He kissed your forehead.

   It was the final scene for the video; Jeno drowning in the pool before he surfaces up, signifying that his paranoia was what killed him. Jeno's acting was more than convincincing, drowning while desperately gasping for air before it killed him. His stomach faced down and he floated in the pool.

One final zoom in on Jeno's body and you were done, "ok Jeno, done!" You reviewed the new footage that you had just shot, satisfied that your vision was coming together. You said once more only to met with the stillness of the chlorine air. "Jeno. I'm done. You can come up now." He wasn't moving at all, face down on the pool. At first, you lightly brushed it off thinking he was just joking with you but you cautiously stepped closer to the pool. "Jeno?" No response. "Ha.ha.ha. Very funny, you got me, you can come up now. The swim team will be here soon." No response. What if he pulled a cramped in between those takes and he was actually drowning?

Nevertheless, you sat the camera down on the bench and stood closer to the edge of the deep end of the pool. "Jeno?" You were panicking now, the worst case possible scenario ran through your head and you had to get him out of there. The only problem was that you can't swim if the pool is too deep so you looked around for those floating device but you didn't see any. So you leaned down flat on the ground and tried to grab ahold of his hand. So close yet so far. "Jeno!" You huffed, your fingertips were close to his, and in the blink of an eye, there was a commotion in the water since Jeno grabbed your hand and dragged you into the pool with him. "Ah!" You yelped as you fell into the pool, creating a huge splash.

"Got you!" Jeno was floating in the pool normally, laughing at his successful prank on you.

You were struggling to keep afloat, your neck barely came out of the surface. Jeno caught on to that and held your waist with one hand as he stayed afloat, while you anchored yourself on him, legs wrapped around his waist and arms around his neck - afraid you would drown the second you let go.

He rested one hand on your back, keeping you secure with his hold. "So you can't swim?" His eyes were full of mischief.

Now that you caught your breath and was able to think more clearly, "you jerk!" You let go of one hand around his neck and hit him hard on the chest that it thudded. "You scared me! Why would you do that? I can swim but not when it's this deep!"

"So you can't swim." He mocked with a cocky tone. "What if I," he paused, "just let go." You dipped in the water just the slightest but Jeno caught you in his arms as his laugh echoed in the pool arena.

You gasped and cursed at him as he did that whilst holding even tighter onto him. "You jerk! I'm going to kill you when we're on land," you threatened him again. "Don't let me go." You pleaded with desperate eyes.

"I won't let you go." He spoke in a hushed voice. Jeno's eyes flicked from your eyes to your lips back to your eyes, and yours mirrored his actions. The waves of the pool pulled you in even closer and without even thinking, your lips were pressed against each other. His lips was hot and tasted of chlorine and saliva and he kept on devouring you, pushing you right up the pool tiles. His hardness created a delicious friction and you involuntarily grinded on him, feeling the vibrations as he moaned. He grabbed your ass, pulled you even closer to him even though the gap was nonexistent between the two of you and you whined on his lips when you felt all of him. His lips chased yours when you separated from him because the sound of faint footsteps approaching the pool arena grew closer. Only the loud silence and heavy breaths filled up the arena, and you grew shy as you drowned in Jeno's eyes.

You spoke out first, "uhm, we should go. The swim team, they're here."

"Ye-yeah," he helped you out of the pull. It was an awkward mess of coming out of the pool and hurrying to leave before the swim team started their practice.

There was so much pressure you wanted to relieve the second you came back to your dorm, however Ryujin, out of all the other days, decided to skip class and chill in the room for the entire day. So the second Ryujin left for the evening, you took out your vibrator and went to town with it; there was an instant relief the second it touched your clothed pussy. You increased the intensity by one level and lulled into a daydream about Jeno, the pool, the villa, and god, imagining his fingers on you again. Once again, you upped the intensity by another level and the familiar coil in your lower belly forming when that moment was interrupted because there was a knock on your window. Shit. You turned off the vibrator and shoved it under your pillow and pulled the curtains to see Jeno with a takeout package and your favourite drink, iced peach lemon tea.

"Hi." Jeno greeted you through the window. "I've got food and your iced peach lemon tea," and came in through the window.

"Oh, uhm, thanks Jeno," you hoped Jeno doesn't noticed your flustered face, and fuck, you were itching for a release. "What are you doing here?"

"Movie night?" He brightly suggested and you both ignored the elephant in the room - the incident in the pool. The pool incident felt different than the time in the villa because it seemed like it was a tit for tat type of thing where you were curious about his dick and he was returning the favour. But the pool was impulsive, hot, and came out of nowhere.

You set up a towel on your bed so you both could eat while watching a movie in bed. Jeno settled himself against the headboard and removed the pillow to make himself even more comfortable when he saw the object underneath it.

Shit.

"Oh, baby, is this what you were doing?" You didn't say anything and felt all shy that Jeno caught you. "You must've hated that I ruined it. Did you come?" He was mocking you with a pout on his face.

"No." You said in a meek voice.

"Awww baby, what are you so shy for?" He pulled you in his lap, leaned in closer and pressed kisses against your jaw, you tilted your neck to the side to let him have more access and let out a soft moaned when he sucked a particular sensitive on your neck. "Fuck." He groaned as he took in the scent of your sweet self, "Because I was a fucking douche for interrupting your time," he sucked in that same sweet again to hear your whine, "let me help you."

Anyone could see that Jeno was a strong and muscular person, but the suddenness in which he manhandled you to sit you on his lap, in front of the mirror across from the bed, made your pussy gush with wetness. Jeno anchored your wait with one hand and spread your thighs opened. You were wearing Jeno's jersey with only a white lace panties underneath it. He moaned at the sight of your damp arousal that seeped through the clothing material. "Fuck," he hissed and kissed you hard and sucked the bottom of your lip before letting it go. "Your poor fucking pussy." He pouted.

"All wet and neglected because of me, right?" He lazily rubbed circles over your cloth clit but that pressure alone was enough to let out a desperate whined, relieved there was at least some sort of pressure. "Tell me, what were you thinking about?"

"You," you shyly confessed.

"You probably thought about me like the I way I was thinking about you in the shower jerking off to you," he rambled on. "Open your mouth," he spat in your mouth and watched the translucent liquid dripped, "take it like a good girl." He forced you to swallow and seeing him like this made your pussy twitched.

He stared at you in the mirror with a lustful gaze, "you're going to watch me watch you please yourself." He nipped your jawline and pressed the vibrator even harder against your clit that made your hips bucked up. "Aww aren't you desperate?" He snaked his hand under your, his, jersey and tweaked your nipple, bringing you pleasure from different sensation.

You grinded against the vibrator, wanting Jeno to increase the intensity so you could come. "Please, want to come," you begged him.

"Aww really?" He said in a condescending and pretended to increase the intensity only to lower it and you cried in disappointment. He did that a couple of times, enjoying watching the way you suffered under his touch. "I just started having fun," he cockily laughed in your ear. "Let me see the damage," and pulled off the oversize jersey, making you shy when you saw yourself topless in the mirror with your boobs hanging out, and your white lace panties soaking wet. "Prettiest boobs I've ever seen," he cupped them in his hand as if to prove a point.

You melted in his body, feeling exposed and shy at your naked self while he was still fully clothed. "You're so cute when you're so fucking shy." He bit your earlobe and trailed his hand down your side and took off your underwear. "There she is," he spreads your pussy with his other hand as the vibrator stimulates you on low. "So wet, all for me?" He teased and slowly inserted his ring and middle finger, instantly reaching deep into places you've never reached before. He heightened the sensation even more by increasing the intensity of the vibrator and you muffled your moans in the crook of his neck, taking in his natural scent, all while he made you come.

You stayed like this for awhile and he licked the juices of his fingers, "you did so well baby, thank you, thank you," and he pressed a gentle kiss on your forehead.

   You know how people say a crush is just a lack of information? Well, you knew more about Jeno than you needed, and boy were you in trouble. If you were down bad for him before you got to know him when he was a mere stranger, now was even worse after getting to know him. The lines between what was real and what was fake blurred as you spent more time with each other. It felt like he was truly in a relationship with you, no facade, no pretending, just you.Each moment spent together meant falling deeper and deeper for Jeno. You knew he preferred staying in and in-door dates but he also knew you enjoyed going to new places so he would always go with you. From pottery dates to, to gym dates, to him teasing you to go to a cat cafe when he absolutely knew that you were scared of cats to the hours tangled in bed. There was also the hour-long calls whenever he was at an away game, and the late night drives in between your busy schedules. Even your friends warmed up to him and allowed his presence for your group karaoke night.

It was hour two of your karaoke session and Jeno still had not grabbed the microphone the entire night, he instead drowned himself with a fizzy drink everytime someone offered it to him. "Let's sing together," you pulled his hand since you knew he was shy when it came to these things but he stubbornly shook his head.

"I can't sing." He gave a pathetic excuse and planted his butt to the faux leather booth.

"None of us can," just then, Wonjin and Taerae harmonised a melodious high note to Taeyeon's I. "Well, most of us."

"Let me be your fan," and he pushed you to the stage while he snacked on some of the nachos. He would rather watch you sing and have fun with your friends than ever go on stage.

"Boo," you gave a thumbs down and playfully stuck out your tongue, "you're no fun."

And gosh, the number of times he's tried to drag you to the locker room shower with him when it was empty after his games or a workout session.

You scrolled on your phone as he changed to a fresh pair of shirt and sweats from his locker. Today he was unsuccessful in getting you in the shower with him because you had just washed your hair and you weren't about to do it all over again. You thought you were safe from the water demon but he playfully splashed some on you before you left the bathroom. So you brewed up a petty revenge plan to get back at him for splashing you with the tiniest drop of water. "Have you every thought what it would be like to be athletic?" You turned to him.

"Hmm?" He tilted his head to the side now that he was dressed in fresh clothes. "I am athletic," he said without a thought.

"No, I mean athletic athletic," you emphasised.

"I am athletic," he poked his tongue against his cheek and sat down on the bench, dragging you on his lap. "I play ice hockey competitively, cycle on weekends, lift weights five times a week, and hike up mountains."

You faced him as you settled yourself comfortably on his lap. "Sure, I guess," you cocked your eyebrows in doubt. "But don't you wish could do more?"

Jeno smirked, seeing right through your facade but decided to play along. "I guess I'm not athletic enough." He gripped your hips and you humped him dry. He snaked his hand down your pussy, "already wet, huh?" You wanted to wipe off the cocky smirk off his face but his fingers felt too good playing with your pussy and pinching your clit. He took off your pants and panties and dropped it on the dirty floor, whereas he only pulled down his sweats down his thigh and squished your boobs like a stresss ball, "ride me," he slapped your ass and shoved your perfect tits in his mouth, sucking and biting them.

You sinked into his tip and was already groaning from feeling of fullness and he wasn't even all the way in. It took a bit of trial and error but you had learnt to take it in slow first and let his cock just sink in you. Inch by inch he was filling you up with is huge cock and you whined when he was only half way inside of you.

Jeno alternated between soft licks and harsh sucks on your nipple, tonguing and moaning over your delicious boobs and leaving bites all over it. He let out a delicious groaned when he felt that he was fully in you and leaned even further back against the metal locker. You felt him twitch inside of you and rocked your hips against his; alternating between swirling your hips in a pattern and bouncing on his hard dick up and down, using his broad shoulders as an anchor. He licked all the to your neck and you moaned when he found and sucked on your sensitive spot, making to leave bruises in the process. He slapped your ass, "faster baby," unsatisfied with your slow pace so like the good girl you were, you bounced even faster on his dick, with your breast jiggling deliciously right in front of his face, until your thighs were burning from the intense pace. Pleasure coiled in your stomach, almost reaching that satisfying feeling but not quite there yet, and grinded on him instead.

Jeno exchanged starved kisses with you and sucked your tongue into his. "Jenoneno, I'm tired," you whined as you broke of the kiss and gave him your best puppy-like eyes, silently begging him to take over like he usually does.

He laughed and spanked your ass again, "what a brat silly girl, you're going to make yourself come on me," he mocked a condescending pout.

You cried on Jeno's shoulder, "please, I'm so tired, want to come," lazily grinding on him.

"Awww baby, you want to come?" His sweet voice dripped with threat, "what to do? I'm not fucking athletic like you said so fucking bounce if you want to come," he rasped in a low voice which made you even wetter.

Jeno watched you struggle as he loosely held onto your hips but not aiding it in any shape or form; you whined at the pain and fullness of his cock, regretting ragebaiting him, but did as he told despite the achiness of your burning thigh. "Please Jeno," your cries echoed in the empty locker room, "want to come, please, please, please," you begged and begged, desperate for release, but you were only met with a patronising attitude of the said man.

"Hmm," he hummed as if his dick wasn't also twitching and reaching a point of orgasm, "say you're sorry and do it well," and squeezed your ass.

You were desperate for anything at this point, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're strong and athletic, please, please, Jeno, I need you," you whined in one go.

Somewhat satisfied with your apology, Jeno places a firm hand on your hips, and thursted you till you were seeing stars and only his name slipped out of your lips. He peppered sweet kisses all over your face, tucked a lock of hair behind your ear, before pressing your lips into a melt-worthy kiss. "Thank you pretty girl, you did so well," and sprinkled more compliments and kisses like you were the only thing that mattered.

There was a drop in the pit of your stomach to the days leading to your "breakup." The kisses were sweeter and you never wanted to untangled yourself from him, and he never did. There was a small hope in the corner of your heart that believed that maybe Jeno had fallen for you and what you had with each other was beyond than what meets the eyes. Especially the way he embraced you in your warm bed, whispered sweet nothings in your ear, and moaned out delectable sounds that you would no longer witness. The day of the breakup approached, money was transferred to your account, and until the last second till you bid goodbye to your relationship, you had hoped Jeno had a change of heart. About you. About anything. Of course he left with easy footsteps, he always knew what he wanted. The least embarrassing thing you did for yourself was that you kept your bittersweet dignity even though so many questions and words ran through the back of your mind, what about us?

   Jeno stared at the blank ceiling, his fingers tapped on his chest, slow and restrained, but they were itching to reach his phone. Another sleepless night after a battle of tossing and turning where his thoughts were his only companion. No, he cannot use his phone. If he used his phone, the first thing he wanted to do was text, no, call you, and hear your sweet voice for hours on end. There was an unfamiliar hollow ache that pained his chest ever since you two went your separate ways. It was all he ever asked for, a simple breakup; you both split the money, and he kept his motorbike safe from Chenle's reckless hands. There was even a cheery smile on your face when you parted ways. So why does it fucking hurt? At this point he didn't even fucking care if he lost the bet, lost his motorbike, if it meant that he wouldn't be losing you.

Why was it that every fibre in his cell refused to move away from you when you went your separate ways? For the first time in his life, his mind and his body were two separate entities: his mind was relieved that it was over while his body screamed at him to not let you go. He had walked away from plenty of girls with a light heart whenever they crossed a line but his footsteps were heavy when you both parted, he looked back secretly hoping you would do the same. However, you did exactly what he wanted, or what he thought he wanted, and made a clean exit without looking back at him - he walked with heavy footsteps that day.

His phone notification lit up with every ping! sound but he ignored them all because it wasn't the notification sound he had for you. The news spread like wildfire that the Lee Jeno was newly single again, he had constantly been receiving dms and personal messages from various people whom he had never even met. Prior to meeting you, maybe he would've been opened to entertaining one or two of them but now he's so fucking repulsed by the thought of being with anyone other than you. True to your words, the story you gave was that you broke it off with him because you weren't right for each other - a simple reason without tarnishing either one's reputation. Fuck that. Not right for each other? Did all those long calls and late night drive meant nothing to you? Were you not right for each other when…

Jeno got up from his bed and went downstairs for a midnight refresher, something to get his mind off you. His friends tried to cheer him up by setting him up on a blind date or take him clubbing like they used to when his routine only consisted of: class, practice, game, and dorm. But he refused all of their advances and preferred to sulked in the comfort of his room. A classic tale of someone going through a breakup. Instead, he was greeted with the delightful sight of Sungchan and Shuhua acting all lovey dovey with each other, and baking cookies in the middle of the night, making the air smell of comfort and warm vanilla. Yuck! He was sick. Ugh. It annoyed him seeing Sungchan with his girlfriend nowadays. Always on late night calls giggling and whispering about his day, and the exaggerated cries when he talks about his injuries, while Jeno's trying to go to sleep; no one needs to hear that, Sungchan!

"Hey, can't sleep?" Sungchan greeted Jeno as he opened the fridge door.

"Yeah," Jeno mumbled and scanned around the fridge until he spotted his zero calorie soda can in the fridge.

"Hey Jeno, want some cookies? We just baked a fresh batch." Shuahua boxed away the fresh cookies in an open container as the other batch bake in the oven for the time being.

"Sure, thanks." Jeno grabbed a cookie from the container and bit into it - it was delicious. But he knew that if you were the one to taste it, you would say something along the lines of, the chocolate chips melted perfectly into the buttery dough and it was the best kind of cookie because it was a crispy chocolate cookie and not a chewy one. Sungchan and Shuhua exchanged concerned looks as they watched a wistful smile formed on Jeno's face while he puts the cookie down. "It's good," he muttered.

"Have some more," Shuhua pushed the container across the kitchen counter.

"No, thanks." Jeno shook his head and raised his can, "just this for me." He was about to go back to his bed and mull over you and his thoughts until morning comes until Sungchan muttered something to Shuhua under his breath.

"We should set him up on a date like yn," Sungchan mumbled to Shuhua, "like kidnap or trick him into going."

"Did you just say yn's going on a date?" Jeno asked, checking to see if he heard it correctly the first time.

Sungchan's eyes popped wide opened, "n-no, I said what's today's date?" Sungchan covered up with a nervous laugh.

"Ok," Jeno eyed Sungchan suspiciously and left the kitchen but hid behind a wall near a kitchen.

"Oof," Sungchan wiped away an invisible sweat, "babe, imagine if he found out yn is going on a date." Sungchan said it loud and clear to Shuhua.

"So she is going on a date," Jeno appeared in the kitchen with a clenched jaw.

"Idiot! You weren't supposed to say anything," she whispered-scolded Sungchan and slapped him on his arm.

"Shit," Sungchan panicked.

"What date?" Jeno asked warily.

"I heard this guy in her music club or something asked her out." Sungchan replied.

"Oh," Jeno processed the information given to him, "with whom? Where? When?"

"You gotta ask the birdie here," Sungchan pointed his thumbs towards Shuhua.

"So, who's the guy?" Jeno asked her.

"Sorry Jeno," Shuhua shrugged and opened the oven because the cookies were done baking, "girl code."

"Ouch," Shuhua dropped the pan on the kitchen since she accidentally touched the hot metal pan without mitten gloves.

"Aw baby," Sungchan cooed and kissed Shuhua's fingertips, lost in each other and had forgotten about Jeno's presence.

As much as Sungchan annoyed him by flaunting his relationship, Sungchan made Jeno realised that he wanted a relationship with you; all the romance, the dates, the cuddling in bed, arguing but always coming back to each other at the end of the day. It made him puked imagining a life without you.

The only problem was that Jeno didn't know how to do relationships: the romance, the dating. He just did what came natural to him and all he knew was that he hated the thought of of another guy being intimate and getting to know you like he did.

Jeno scoffed when he spotted you and the other guy at 90's Love. It's our spot. Fine, if Shuhua didn't want to give him the details of your date, fine by him. Jokes on her because he knew your entire schedule by heart and waited till you were done with your class for the day and discreetly followed you with Mark's car that he had borrowed for the day.

He hid in the car and watched as you took the booth by the window. The guy you were with was tall and some might even say good looking but who knows. Everything seemed normal at first, you were chatting with the other guy, maybe a bit too happily, but it all changed for Jeno when he saw the guy laughed a bit too hard and wiped your mouth with a napkin and he dashed right in the diner.

"Thank you Zhang Hao," you took the napkin from him, a bit uncomfortable from the sudden touch.

"You're welcome yn." He flashed a gentle smile, "how do you like your food?"

"It's great," you reciprocated the same energy but being here on a date with another guy just felt wrong. It was your to-go spot with Jeno: whenever you were bored, needed a pick me up, or was just craving their delicious strawberry milkshake.

"Thank you for going on this date with me," he blushed shyly, "if I'm being honest, I wasn't sure if you were going to say yes considering it hasn't been that long since your breakup."

You sipped your strawberry milkshake, "you're surprised? I'm surprised you're even sitting down with me because you're always so busy with the club, music, and the student council." You strayed the topic away from Jeno, "like how do you do it all?"

"Do I seem like a loser?" He bit his lips while he gave you a shy smile.

"No, it's cute," you teased him. This was the first time that you had talked to Zhang Hao outside of the music club, you guys would usually say hi to each other or make small talk before practice began but that was it, so it came a bit of a surprise when he asked you out and you thought it would be nice to move on from Jeno after all these. Zhang Hao was a sweetheart, comfortable, and maybe in another universe you would've fallen for him, unfortunately, no butterflies swirled around your stomach when you're with him - just indifference.

Out of nowhere, Jeno entered the diner, slid into your booth, sat beside you, and sipped on your strawberry milkshake like you were still a couple.

"Hi," you glanced at Zhang Hao and Jeno.

"Hey, oh! You got my favourite loaded fries." He made himself comfortable and ate a couple of fries.

"Jeno, um, we're kind of in the middle of a date," you cleared your throat and looked nervously at Zhang Hao, unsure of what was going on.

"How rude of me," he wiped his oily hand on the napkin and extended his hand for a handshake, "Jeno, boyfriend."

Zhang Hao accepted his handshake with confusion, "Zhang Hao," wondering if he heard Jeno say boyfriend or boy friend.

"Boy," you paused for emphasis, "friend."

"Boyfriend," he stated again and took a bite out of your burger. "Ooh, you got my burger order, this is the good stuff."

Zhang Hao stared with his jaw dropped and looked hesitantly between you and Jeno, too scared and confused to say anything. So you stepped up, "can you excuse me for one second Zhang Hao? I just need to talk to Jeno for a bit." and went outside the diner with Jeno who flashed a smug smile at Zhang Hao.

You pulled Jeno to a secluded corner to have a private conversation and crossed your arms, "what's going on Jeno? I've never seen you act like this."

Jeno contemplated for awhile about how he wanted to say what he wanted to say but decided on the straight truth, "yn, I didn't realised this until after our whole deal was done, but I like you and when I heard you were going on a date with another guy that wasn't me, it pissed me off because I want to be that guy. I want to be your," Jeno gazed at you with sincere eyes, "boyfriend," he breathed out the last word.

Your shoulders dropped and your head titled with furrowed eyebrows. "Jeno, listen, I like you too," you started off and there was a gleam of hope in his eyes, "and I enjoyed our time together regardless of the bet," his lips tugged upwards, "but I don't think you like me."

His lips frowned and his heart dropped. "Are you telling me how to feel about you?" A bit confused with your response.

"No, well yeah, well - ok, let me ask you this, sex out of the way, have you ever dated anyone seriously? or spent time with any of the girls you used to hook up with?" You uncrossed your arms and explained.

"No." He admitted.

"Why?"

"I just never did," he shrugged his shoulders, "but I want to be in a relationship with you, you're different from other girls."

Your lips pressed into a thin line, "I'm exactly like other girls. The only difference between me and them is that you actually took the time to get to know me - well, forcibly, but I stand by my point."

"Ok?" He was still confused.

"All I'm saying is that all of this was a coincidence. If it was someone else who ordered the iced peach lemon tea or whatever drink or if you actually got to know the person you fooled around with, you would be confessing to her and not me." There was a pregnant pause. "I just happened to be the girl in this position," you muttered the last sentence.

He shook his head. "So?" He said almost a bit too blunt for your taste. "It doesn't matter because, at the end of the day, you're the one that I got to know."

Your voice cracked with a shallow breath, "Fine then, maybe there's still this unconscious guilt inside of you from hitting me." You tried reasoning with Jeno but you knew deep down that it was for you. It wasn't my possible for Jeno to fall in love with you because he doesn't fall for people and you were an anamoly. Even if was spelling it out for you. Because if you did end up dating him, the crack in your heart will never heal at the inevitability of him, eventually, moving to the next person. This was the only way to protect you from a disastrous heartache. "I forgive you Jeno and I know it was an accident. Water under the bridge. I'm all healed now and you even took me out to lunch the first time we talked to each other because you felt bad. You don't owe me anything anymore nor do I owe you anything." You stood firm on your ground, "take care Jeno," you bid goodbye before you entered the diner to resume your date with Zhang Hao.

Jeno stayed silent even after you left, contemplating and processing your words. The logical part of him agreed with you that it was just the time spent together that made him fall in love with you, but the thing that bothered him the most? Your unwavering reaction to his confession. Maybe you truly didn't see him beyond a friend and a fuck, and maybe, he never truly stood a chance to be with you. He should've known it wasn't going to be easy because all these years asking the universe for a clean goodbye, you served it to him on a silver platter.

   It was the Premiere Day showcasing all the films in the auditorium. Professor Sooyoung had booked out the auditorium so all your classmates can enjoy the fruits of your labour together and even opened it up to the public so any student can join in and watch as well. You sat in the middle row beside your friend with the charm bracelet, excited to watch everyone's film.

"Did you invite anyone else?" She asked.

"Yeah I did, they couldn't make though because they all have class but it's ok since we already watched it together. How about you?" You scanned around the room looking for a particular individual but there were no signs of him. Despite the last interaction with Jeno, you had invited him to the Premiere Day since it was his film too. He deserved it. But he never responded to your text so you weren't sure if he was going to be here or not.

"Same, they have lab today." She replied, "is Jeno coming?" She asked.

You slummed your shoulders with disappointment, "I'm not sure," pretending like it hasn't affected you.

The winner for the local competition was announced a couple of days ago, unfortunately, you didn't win but your Professor liked it, so only that mattered. Soon after, the chatter died down, the lights dimmed out, and screen light flashed up - Everyone's eyes were focused on the moving screen in front of them.

In between the films showcasing, Jeno slipped into the auditorium and sat in the back seat with his hoodie up and a cap that covered the top half of his face. Even in the vast darkness of the auditorium, he easily recognized the back of your head, his eyes naturally gravitates towards you. The whole place was quiet except for the sounds that came from the screen, and the people beside him who were munching on their food too loudly. For the first time since he entered the auditorium, he turned his head to the left side, instead of staring at you, to politely asked them to quiet down only to met with a familiar face. "Haechan?" Jeno whispered, "what are you doing here?"

"Watching the films, duh," he obnoxiously shoved in another pack of chips in his mouth.

"Don't you have class right now?" Jeno asked himz

"We all ditched," Sungchan whispered.

"Sungchan?" Jeno was taken back to see another friend of his in the auditorium.

"When is yours going to show?" Serim asked.

"Yeah dude, I'm dying to watch it," Mark added in a bit too loud.

"Just shhh," he placed his index over his lips with a stern face but they ignored him and kept on whispering to each other in the back row.

Your heart drummed when the next film opens to a sound you've heard a million times while editing to the point you got so sick of it - you wanted to be free from the shackles you had created. It was torturous to edit something you once loved so much and all the memories attached with it, only for it to be bittersweet at the end.

The film opened with Jeno taking off his hockey gear in the locker room, you noticed everyone's eyes were locked in as they leaned forward in their seats as Jeno pulledoff his shirt, revealing his toned abs, and you swear you heard someone audibly gulped at the sight of Jeno topless. Yes! Baited!

"Fuck, you look hot man," Haechan whispered-hollered at Jeno and all the guys joined in.

"Just shut up and watch," Jeno rolled his eyes, feeling embarrassed to watch himself like this in front of an audience.

"Ooh, Mr.Actor thinks he's a hotshot," Sungchan mocked.

All the sweet memories flooded in Jeno's mind as he watched the film to the very end. Even though you had shared the final version with him before you submitted it, he didn't have the heart to watch it, and when you texted him about today, he never planned on showing up but his body betrayed his intention. All those hours spent on filming, editing, and complaining was worth it because chills went through his body when his character died in the pool. That day in the pool changed everything.

"Brooo, you can act," Mark patted Jeno on the back even though he was a couple of seats away.

"Goosebumps. Literal goosebumps," Serim commented, "I'm not sleeping by myself tonight.

While that was happening, in the middle aisle where you were sitting with your friend, you were feeling shy from all the compliments that your friend threw at you. "That was incredible!" She gushed over your video, "the hook scene with Jeno and I don't even like him like that! If I were you, I would've kept that to myself." She joked.

"Sharing is caring," you joked back. Once more, you glanced around the auditorium now that the lights slowly came back to life, looking for the main character of your video. Your eyes fixated on the back row, a bit surprised to see them, where you spotted Haechan, Sungchan, Serim, and Mark eating packs of snacks. Then, your eyes caught onto the silhouette with the hoodie and the cap, his face was covered but you had a feeling it was-

"Hold on!" A voice boomed from the stage and a figure emerged from the shadows of the stage with a microphone. You turned your attention back to the stage as the chatter died down once again. "That was an interesting film." Keeho commanded the stage and stared directly at you. Only for you to glanced at your friend, giving each other a, "what's going on look?" considering you've never even had a conversation with Keeho.

"Or was it a real-life-soon-to-happen documentary?" He dramatically continued on stage and people murmured in confusion at his accusation. Your friend held your hand as you sat up straighter and your eyebrows furrowed into confusion - an anxious, inkling feeling pricked through your bones. "This film was not fictional. It was her fantasy." He cackled evilly, "that's going to become her reality."

Keeho pressed a small remote in his pocket which changed the screen from your film to a familiar notebook that you had lost awhile ago, your Jeno Journal. Oh no! You stayed frozen as sweats formed around your temples and heart started racing. The screen flashed all your most embarrassing, inner thoughts for everyone to see: Jeno please notice me, he smells so nice I wonder what shampoo he uses, let me lick his fresh sweats, practically soulmates cuz we like the same brand of gummy bear, hehe going to the cafe library cuz I know hes there to get an iced americano, hes wearing jeans today so no practice for him, and much, much more.

A fusion of anger and embarrassment furled inside of you because these were your private thoughts that belonged to only you, and instead, Keeho, however he found the notebook, violated your privacy and made it his entertainment. Your fingers curled up into a tight fist and you got up from the seat at the same time as your friend; you weren't sure if you wanted to confront Keeho or leave the place, all you knew was that you needed to do something. Before you could even decide which action to take, someone had jumped on stage and punched Keeho in the face. Oof. The sound was not pretty. It was Jeno; his hoodie was down and his cap flew off somewhere. Jeno yanked the remote off Keeho and switched off the screen, leaving it white and blank.

"Ouch, that hurts," Keeho wiped away the blood that oozed out of the corner of his lips.

Jeno ignored Keeho's comment, and without a problem, trapped him in a headlocked on the stage floor. Some took out their phones and recorded the brawl, including his own friends, some gasped in shocked, while others chanted, "fight!" "fight!" repeatedly. Whereas you stood in complete bewilderment at the scene in front of you.

"Do you want to leave?" Your friend was concerned at how fast the situation escalated.

You appreciated the way she was still holding your hand, "no," you whispered back.

"Give back the book and apologise to her," Jeno headlocked him even tighter against his hold, not tight enough to cause him any damage but tight enough to know that he was serious about his threat, as Keeho gasped for air, his hands tapping out.

"O-okay," he gasped out before Jeno loosened his hold on him.

"Journal, now." Jeno demanded and glared his eyes at him as they both stood up and faced each other. Only now that anger had melted off a bit, Jeno realised that people were recording and watching him as he stood under the stage light. The thing he hated most was unwanted attention and here he was, not caring about any of it, and only cared about you.

"Fine," Keeho took out the small notebook from his back pocket and displayed it in front of him and pulled in a smirked, "just so you know, I would call the police if I were you because the things that she has written in the note-,"

Jeno clenched his jaw and poked his tongue against the inside of his cheek, and cracked his fingers. With menacing steps, he approached Keeho to headlock him again but Keeho was already down on his knees begging for mercy.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he begged for forgiveness.

Jeno rolled his eyes at him and snatched the notebook sfrom him. "Why did you do this?" His voice still dropped with threat.

"It's because you lied to me. You weren't the model for my portrait? Fine. But you said that you would help me the next but didn't! You lied to me! You were already filming with her instead of me." Keeho cried out his reasons.

"Shouldn't you be attacking me instead of her?" Jeno asked, a bit confused. "And, she asked me first."

"Oh." A moment of realisation hit Keeho. "It is what it is?" He offered an awkward laughed.

"Booo you whore." Haechan yelled Keeho.

"Stop shaming woman!" Someone from the crowd shouted.

"Get outta here!" Sungchan booed.

"He doesn't even go here!" Mark howled.

 "Misogynistic pig!" Your friend piped up.

"Apologise to her!" Serim yelled.

"We all want to lick his sweat!" Someone else screamed.

The entire crowd booed at Keeho and chanted, "apologise! Apologise!" repeatedly. Jeno himself bunched Keeho's shirt and dragged him down the stage to where you were standing with your friend. He shoved Keeho down on his knees in front of you, "apologise," Jeno demanded once again.

"I'm sorry," Keeho muttered.

"Louder," Jeno ordered, "she can barely hear you."

Keeho cleared his throat, "I'm sorry for invading your privacy and putting it up on public display."

"I don't forgive you but I don't ever want this to happen again, to me or anyone else." You replied.

"Now scram," Jeno said. The crowd cheered when Keeho scurried out of the auditorium, but not without tripping himself first.

"And this belongs to you," Jeno handed you the small black notebook to you.

"Thank you, Jeno," and your hand lingered on each other while the book was passed to you.

"Yo Jeno, what shampoo do you use?" A voice asked from the crowd, breaking the moment between the two of you.

He looked around awkwardly at the crowd who were waiting for his response, "apple scented," he commented. A chorus of "ahs" echoed.

"What brand?" Someone else asked.

"A five-in-one." There were audible gasps of disappointment that echoed throughout the small auditorium.

The crowd left excited, sharing more gossips with each other after the whole debacle died down as they exited the auditorium. "Wanna go get a little pick me up?" Your friend asked.

"Can I take a rain check? I need to do something first."

"Ok, see you!" You hugged your friend goodbye and she disappeared into the long hallway. Whereas you waited outside of the auditorium, in the corner, for Jeno to exit the premise. A minute later, Jeno showed up at the exit door and you pulled his hand to get his attention. "Jeno, can we talk for a minute?"

Jeno was taken aback but he nodded in agreement, "sure."

"Ohhh, they're getting back together," Mark teased and the other guys followed suit with the teasing.

"Privately," you whispered to Jeno, your hand was still holding his.

They were never going to let this down. They were ruining the moment he was having with you so he sent them death glares.

"Guys stop it, he's going to smack us down in front of people," Haechan teased some more and they ran away while laughing.

You pulled Jeno to a secluded corner where people rarely passed by. You were the first one to pull your hand away from his, "thank you for standing up for me."

"That was a fucked up thing for him to do," Jeno shoved his hands in the pockets of his hoodie.

You handed the journal to him. "This belongs to you because no matter how much I think about it, I shouldn't have done that to you even if it was for myself. It was wrong of me and I'm sorry Jeno," and waited for him to take the journal but his hands were still in his pockets.

He took out his hands from pockets and stepped forward, "what are you sorry for?" He leaned his face closer to yours.

"I'm sorry for writing all those things about you."

There was a smug smile on his face, "what things?" and leaned in even closer until you were a teasing breath away from him, his eyes flicked from your eyes to your lips.

You pulled your head back a bit from Jeno, feeling a bit hot from the sudden tension, "for - um - writing inappropriate things and stalking your schedule, and," your eyes flickered from his eyes to his lips back to his eyes. "And - and,"

Jeno lifted your chin up towards him and pulled your waist closer towards him, and he kissed you on the lips; unspoken words between the two of you was translated in a singular moment of passion, guilt, and love. You missed him terrribly and so did he.

"I've missed you, I've missed you, I've missed you," he muttered on your lips.

"You're not mad at me?" You asked him while the journal was in between you two.

"I am mad at you," Jeno remarked lightly. You pouted a guilty look and looked down to the ground but Jeno pulled you to his again. "I'm mad at you for not telling the truth."

You avoided his eye intense gaze. "I'm sorry J-"

"I'm mad at you for not being honest about your feelings with me. The truth that you liked me." He cupped your face in his hands, not letting you get away. "I'm mad at you for pushing me away. Why?" His last word carried a heavy weight.

"Because you said to not fall in love with you, and I already was," you explained, "and because you don't do relationships."  

"And I was an idiot for that," he leaned his forehead against yours and intertwined your hands with his. God, did he miss playing with your hands. "I only did what I did on stage because of you. I wouldn't have done it for anyone else," he said, removing any doubts you had of his love and affection for you. "Please give me a chance to prove you wrong. Let's give us a chance, for real this time."

Your eyes flickered with the tiniest bit of hesitation. "I appreciate you, I really do but-"

"Forget about everything else, just tell me you want this as much I want you?" His eyes pleaded with desperation.

You offered a quiet hum at first, secretly making Jeno nervous at your silence. "We can give us a try," you said after much deliberation.

With the softest touch, he flicked the side of your head and kissed it. "We could've had this sooner, silly girl." He embraced you in a warm hug and whispered down to you, "now, what else did my favourite pervert write in the journal?"

"Not a pervert," heat crawled up your entire body so you hid your face in Jeno's chest and let out a small sound of embarrassment.

"It's fine, I'm a bigger pervert than you are," Jeno let out a hearty laughed. You were it for Jeno.

  "One more time." Jeno angled the poloroid in front of you since you were perched on his lap.

"Again?" You sipped on your iced peach lemon tea and placed it back in the middle console.

"Yes, sit still and look pretty for me." He said in a serious tone.

"My favourite couple!" Chenle came running to the car on the gravelled road with his huge suitcase and sunglasses perched on his head. "Me too! I wanna join!" He saw the way you both were cuddled up and was envious that you both were taking pictures without him. "I wanna take pictures too!" Chenle attempted to climb on Jeno's lap in the crowded seat but Jeno pushed him away, accidentally a bit too hard, and Chenle fell on the gravelled ground. "Shit, that hurts." There was the tiniest cut on the palm of his hand and he looked like he was on the verge of tears.

"Jeno," you lightly scolded him, only for him to frowned a little.

Feeling guilty from the way he accidentally pushed Chenle a bit too roughly, he patted his other thigh with a defeated look. "Come on, Chenle. I didn't mean to push you hard." Chenle climbed on top of Jeno like an excited puppy and made himself comfortable on his lap, "oof," Jeno grunted when Chenle sat his full body weight on Jeno; two people were now on his lap, you on the right and Chenle on the left,

"Yay!" Chenle caressed Jeno's pecs over his shirt and felt up his biceps.

You flicked away Chenle's hands on Jeno's body. "Don't touch my man."

"I knew him first!" Jeno moved his ear away from Chenle and wiped off the splattered saliva from him.

"Say that a bit louder, I don't think we heard you." Jeno dryly remarked.

Chenle melted even more against Jeno's chest and noticed a, small but sparkling, "J" neck on you. "Nice necklace," he commented.

"Thanks!" You showed off the pretty necklace to Chenle. "Jeno got it for me." This kind of necklace wasn't your favourite but Jeno looked so cute and nervous before he gave it to you that you started loving it because of the meaning behind it.

"Looks expensive," Chenle noted the beautiful shimmer of the necklace.

"Yeah, used the bet money to buy this pretty little thing." Jeno squeezed your hip with one hand.

Chenle snorted. "All of it?"

"Well, half had to go to her," Jeno feigned a heartache as he nuzzled into you closer with a pout, "just for her to spend it on some boy band."

You slapped his chest, "it was vip tickets for The Visionary!"

"What?! What do you mean half had to go to her?" Chenle shouted even louder than last time which made Jeno flinched - he knows who to blame if he ever goes deaf one day.

"I owed her that money, a deal is a deal," Jeno interlocked your hands with his and played with your fingers and ignored the numbing sensation on his left thigh.

"You knew it was a bet?!" Chenle shouted again.

"Yeah." You nodded nonchalantly and leaned your head on Jeno's shoulder.

"Since when? Towards the end?"

"Since day one." You replied.

"And you agreed to it?" Chenle asked.

"It was easy money." You rolled your eyes. "We pretended to date so he could keep his bike," you rolled your eyes, "and see other girls."

"You're the only one for me now," Jeno kissed your knuckles.

"Not to ruin this barf-worthy, sappy moment but you cheated Jeno Lee!" He yelled at him again. "It means you owe me your motorbike! And my money back!"

"If you can ride it, you can take it." Jeno shrugged off Chenle's attitude. "But I already spent all your money."

"Shut up." Chenle was fuming and crossed his arms. "So, I won but it doesn't feel like I won."

"Yeah, I'm the winner." Jeno smirked a cocky smile at Chenle who was still whining, "come on, don't be a sore loser."

"Yeah, you're the loser here." You playfully snickered and made the letter L with your fingers and Jeno joined in on the teasing saying that he was a loser.

On the surface, Chenle sulked and complained like a true sore loser, however, he held back a victorious smirked because what you and Jeno both didn't know was that he, Chenle, was the real winner.

The university ice hockey team had won yet another game and everyone in the stand cheered with excitement. "We won! We won!" Chenle cheered for his hockey friends and jumped up and down with you, Yeji, Ryujin, Wonjin, and Taerae. All of your faces were covered with the university's colour, courtesy of Ryujin. The cheers didn't die down until minutes later because it was the first win of the season, but soon after, people left the hockey arena one by one in an orderly fashion. Most people would just leave the area but some students would stop and take pictures with their favourite player.

"Wait guys, I'll meet you at the exit, I wanna say hi to my hockey friends," Chenle waved at hockey team and skipped towards them.

You squatted down and set your iced peach lemon tea drink beside you, and unlaced your shoelaces even though it was originally perfectly tight and intact.

"Are you coming?" Yeji turned back when she realised you weren't beside them.

"Yeah, go ahead, just tying my shoelaces," you laced up your shoelaces at a very purposeful snail pace as you stole glances of people taking pictures with your favourite player, and secret crush, Lee Jeno. He had freshly dyed his hair dark blue and politely took pictures with everyone who asked for them. Even if some of them were a bit too touchy or a bit aggressive with their touch, Jeno brushed it off with his signature eye smile. At every game you've been to, you had often debated to ask for a picture with Jeno but always chickened out once you saw just how many girls waited and lined up for him. That was part of the reason your crush on him grew bigger, he was always so kind and nice to others despite his looks - although, romantic relationships was not in his dictionary.

Maybe this time? The crowd had already thinned out so you wouldn't be embarrassing yourself and he was already taking pictures with other people so he would most likely take it with you too. You tied up your shoelaces with courage, picked up your drink and stood up from your spot; your feet angled towards the icy rink but you froze when you saw that smile in his eyes, a different smile, the kind that looked like he just fell in love and was on cloud nine, while talking to a girl. With a defeated spirit, you slummed towards the exit. Again.

What you had failed to noticed as you walked out the place was that Chenle was watching your every move. Like clockwork, you always exited the area later than your friends because of your shoes but he never understood that because your laces were perfectly tight and laced up whenever he looked down at them. Out of curiosity, he followed your line of vision and it landed right on Jeno. Ah. He saw how your eyes glimmered at the sight of Jeno and a plan evilly brewed inside his head.

It’s such a bittersweet feeling that this is finally out there because this fanfic, for some reason, I had a lot of ups and downs with it and it didn’t have anything to do with me struggling with the plot line or the characters. The original draft was written awhile ago but I stopped and let it marinate because I didn’t like where the story was headed and wasn’t a big fan of the character. I let the fanfic collect dust with the intention of revamping it one day but I never did so I accepted the fate that it would die and simply be gone. Then I started writing the other Jeno fanfics and was struck with inspiration to revamp the entire thing and I did it! But in between all the writing and editing, there was a lot of doubt and negative attachment towards this for some reason??? Like I can’t even explain it cuz I also don’t know what it is 😭 whatever it is, I thought about dumping and deleting the story halfway when I was done but for some odd reason, I didn’t dump it, and continued working on it. Anyways, thank you if you’ve read this absolutely mess about a person stressing over a silly fanfic and thank u @neowinestainedress for supporting this nothingburger! And thank u for taking ur time to read this fanfic and I really do hope u all enjoyed it despite whatever feelings I have towards it! I always get so happy when ppl share their thoughts about the fanfic with me 💗.

[lovesuhng]

cold

1.9k / fluff, co-workers to lovers

Since you started working at that company, there was one name that made you shiver every time you heard it: Lee Jeno. You hadn't worked together, only exchanged a few formal greetings, but it was impossible not to hear what people were saying about him in the hallways. The comments were always made in hushed tones by your coworkers, afraid he might show up and hear everything they were saying about him:

"I heard an intern cried because she had to share a room with Jeno."

"They say a manager was fired from the company after arguing with Jeno in a meeting, and he just stood there, watching it all."

"I've been working here for two years and I've never seen him smile at anyone."

"He doesn't go to happy hour, he doesn't have lunch with the staff, he doesn't participate in anything."

"There's a rumor that he joined the company in a senior position without going through the selection process! He must definitely know some dirt on one of the bosses."

That was the image people had of him: cold, calculating, distant from everyone, and he avoided forming bonds with people as much as possible.

Until, in the middle of a meeting to present the company's new project, your boss said:

"____, Jeno, I need you two to work together on this project."

An immediate chill went through your stomach. All you did was nod and direct your gaze to your newest work partner, who was on the other side of the large table. He might be cold, but he was certainly one of the most handsome men you had ever seen: perfectly styled hair, a body hidden by a black suit that looked tailor-made, glasses resting on a perfectly sculpted nose, just like every other part of his face. He also looked at you and nodded, saying a quiet "Understood." That made you more nervous than it should have.

The meeting ended and the room quickly emptied out. You ended up staying behind, wanting to use the now-empty room to organize some pending tasks, when you felt a presence beside you. It was Jeno. "Can we align the project schedule?"

It took you a moment to realize he was talking to you. "Yes. Of course. The schedule." If you could, you would have slapped yourself on the forehead.

Jeno took a chair and promptly sat down next to you, perhaps too close, because his scent invaded your senses. Although it was a woody aroma, it was comforting.

"I was thinking of dividing it into three stages: research, execution, and validation," he said in a professional manner, pointing to the notes he had taken on his laptop during the meeting, explaining each point. But your attention was on his hands: large, firm. For a fraction of a second, you wondered what it would be like to be gripped by them...

"What do you think?" he asked, bringing your attention back.

"I... I liked it.”

"Which part?"

"Uh... all of it?" Clearly, you hadn't paid attention to a single word he had just said.

He let out a short, quiet laugh. "I can explain it again if you want." Jeno was calm, patient, as if he could explain the same thing a million times.

"I'm sorry, I'm not managing to concentrate properly today."

"It's okay," he said and simply began to explain everything again in the most patient way possible.

In the following days, messing up around Jeno became something that happened almost all the time. Partly because you thought he would lose his temper with you, partly because he was too handsome up close.

One day you spilled coffee near his desk, another day you forgot to do the research he had asked for. You even mixed up his name with your best friend's. But he would always say, accompanied by a half-smile: "It's okay."

Another time, you were walking past the break room and dropped the pile of documents you were holding. "My God, what is wrong with me?" you whispered, frustrated with the whole situation.

Then, you saw a hand enter your field of vision. Jeno was crouching beside you, helping you gather all the papers scattered across the floor. He was very close, close enough for you to feel the warmth of his body and his shoulder brushing against yours.

"There's nothing wrong with you." He had heard the complaint you made to yourself.

"Maybe, but I've been very nervous lately."

"Nervous around me?"

Your eyes widened in a way you didn't think was possible, and you ended up stumbling over your own words: "No... I mean, yes, maybe... I don't know..."

He observed you for a moment longer, trying to understand what you were trying to say. He simply handed you the organized pile of papers.

After spending so much time with him, you were slowly realizing that he wasn't the monster people said he was. He was always willing to help you at various points in the project. But your impression of him truly changed one night when you stayed a little later at the office and heard someone crying. When you found where the sound was coming from, you realized the person was with Jeno, who was speaking in a firm, yet soft tone of voice.

"Take a deep breath, everything will be fine."

You recognized that he was talking to a colleague from the finance department who had probably made a mistake at work.

"I messed up everything and missed the deadline. They're going to fire me!" she said between sobs.

"No, they won't. I'll help you," he said calmly.

"But you're still so busy with work."

"It's not a problem. I'll help you."

And he did. He explained, helped and kept your colleague calm the whole time. It was then that you realized everyone was wrong about Jeno. Your heart began to fill with something you didn't understand, but it was very comforting.

After that moment, your relationship with Jeno gradually changed, as if you were starting to feel more comfortable around him.

He noticed it.

From then on, he always brought you a coffee before starting work, organized the files to "make your job easier," and even made "jokes" to lighten the mood, making you laugh because they were so bad.

One night when you both stayed a little late, it was raining and you had forgotten your umbrella. Jeno looked at the rain, then looked at you.

"I'll drive you home." He wasn't asking. He was just saying he would take you home.

"You don't have to, I live nearby."

"But you might catch a cold, and I don't want that to happen." Seeing that Jeno cared about you made your heart skip a beat.

You walked to his car, sharing the small space of the umbrella. Upon reaching the car, Jeno opened the passenger door for you to get in, and then took his place behind the wheel.

Indeed, you lived very close, so the drive was quick and quiet.

"We arrived! Thank you so much—" You were about to get out of the car, but Jeno was faster: he rushed to open the door for you and already had the umbrella open to guide you to the door of your small house.

"You didn't have to do all that."

"It's no trouble at all."

Jeno stopped in front of the door, still holding the umbrella above the two of you. You twirled the keys between your fingers, a little nervous:

"Jeno..." You called him before he could say goodbye and leave.

"Hmm?" He tilted his head slightly, as he always did when you spoke. If you weren't so nervous, you would have said he looked like a lost puppy, but you just swallowed hard.

"Can I ask you something?" He just nodded his head, and you asked: "Why are you so kind to me?"

He furrowed his eyebrows slightly. He didn't seem offended, just confused by the sudden question. "Kind?"

"Yes... kind." You gave an awkward laugh, trying to make the situation a little lighter. "I always heard you were cold, that you didn't like to socialize with people at the company. I confess that, at the beginning of the project, I was a little scared, that's why I was so nervous and messed up all the time." You laughed again, looking away. You wouldn't be able to handle seeing the confused expression Jeno was making at that moment.

His gaze softened. He began to understand the reason for your nervousness, but one part of your speech caught him: "You were scared of me?"

"Not exactly scared of you, but I was afraid you'd hate me..." You sighed, but before he could answer, you completed. "But as time pass by, I realized I was completely wrong. That there was no reason to be afraid of you."

Your eyes returned to his, which were looking at you intensely. Then, he smiled, relieved.

"I'm happy to hear that, because I would never hate you." Your stomach flipped, your hands started to sweat. "I was the one who was afraid that you would have the same view of me that everyone else does."

It took your brain a whole second to process what he was saying. Lee Jeno was afraid of what you thought of him? "But, why?"

For the first time, you saw a totally nervous Jeno, rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand, trying to calm down somehow. After a few seconds, which seemed eternal, he told you: "Because I like you a lot."

Everything seemed to stop. The rain, the cars, any sound on the street. There was only you and Jeno. It was his turn to let out an awkward little laugh. "I know... I'm not very good at this. I've liked you since the beginning of the project... I mean, even earlier. I just didn't know how to approach you without making you uncomfortable."

Your heart was beating so fast that you were afraid he could hear it, but even so, you moved even closer to him, as if that were possible.

"You never made me uncomfortable, but I thought you were just being polite."

Jeno didn't answer, he just touched your cheek, as if that touch could convey all the affection he felt for you. You didn't pull away or ask him to stop at any point, you just smiled. Jeno understood that this was a signal, but even so, polite as always, he decided to ask you.

"May I?"

You couldn't seem to answer, you just confirmed by looking at his lips. Jeno got the message. The space between you slowly closed, your breaths mingled, and slowly, Jeno touched his lips to yours, in a calm, almost shy kiss, but warm enough to make your hearts race at an inexplicable rhythm.

When you felt him starting to pull away, you held him by the collar of his overcoat, pulling him back for a second kiss, more intense, to the point where Jeno dropped the umbrella without noticing and took hold of your waist. Jeno's warm touch contrasted perfectly with the cold wind caused by the rain.

When you separated, you remained with your foreheads touching and in an intense exchange of glances. You smiled and broke the silence. "It looks like it's not raining anymore, huh?"

Jeno smiled, finally realizing that the rain had stopped. For the first time, you saw Jeno smile openly, very different from the contained smiles he used to give, which you already found beautiful.

"Are you still scared?"

You chuckled softly, feeling your face warm. "I'm not scared, because I realized I've liked you for a while now."

Jeno's eyes sparkled, truly happy to have heard that. "So, can I kiss you again?"

Once again, you didn't answer. You just opened the door, took Jeno's hand, and pulled him inside the house while joining your lips in another kiss.