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water whispers. “T𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙖𝙣 𝙤𝙘𝙚𝙖𝙣 𝙤𝙛 𝙨𝙞𝙡𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙩𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙣 𝙪𝙨… 𝙖𝙣𝙙 I 𝙖𝙢 𝙙𝙧𝙤𝙬𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙣 𝙞𝙩.” — R𝙖𝙣𝙖𝙩𝙖 S𝙪𝙯𝙪𝙠𝙞 ••••• 👈🏽 swipe < shibuya #prequel edit << pre-animated edit <<< original image from picsart 🌈 follow me for original edits & dope aesthetix ••••• #vaporwave #vaporwavevibes #pinkandpurple #riverart #riverbed #surrealnature #contemporarysurrealism #surrealism #surrealartist #photomanipulationart #worldvisualcollective #waterart #dreamyvibes #chillvibes #seattleartists #filipinaartist #quotestagram #lostlovequotes #ranatasuzuki #aestheticedits #aestheticaccount #neonlover #neonaesthetic (at Surreal World) https://www.instagram.com/p/CU9SQz_LL4Y/?utm_medium=tumblr
At this time in my life..
I don’t crave sex.
I crave something much deeper than that...
I crave a connection.
I crave that electric touch.
I crave a soul that sees mine.
I crave that feeling of sunshine..
That feeling I haven’t felt in what feels like forever..
What I’d do to feel that again...
Let’s talk one day
When everything’s said and done
Not about daily troubles or things that rubble
But as I your son
Let’s converse about the things buried under the rug
The things kept between you and I
Bitter lies
Hidden truths
Dagger through
Let’s talk till I’m not mad at you
Let’s talk till I know a better you
Not talk about the things that’s meant to be
Let’s talk about what happened
It’s not so tragic that we can’t patch it With time elapsing
Why do we choose to move backwards Let’s talk till both our lungs hurt
Express our pain Outwards
Because we can’t heal without words
Things like this takes immense work
I’ll forgive the times when you were a jerk
You’ll forgive the times I lied till I got tongue-tied
But still, I hide behind
Distorted truths And deceptions
My tongue is my lethal weapon
The words I use are my injection
To change our bitter future it was destined to be
We can not move on just by leaving
It’s not easy
Emotions never leave me
It only builds hate for you
That’s why when I turned 18 I moved eight states from you
To be honest, I just needed a break from you,
To be honest, I think I made mistakes who knew that
I could truly admit the times when I’m at fault
I’m appalled
Back doesn’t have to be against the wall, to tell the truth,
So let’s talk one day
Let’s move forward and see brighter days
Let’s not live in the past and let’s find a way
Ever since you left
Ever since you left..
The silence has been too loud
almost deafening
I was starting to get accustomed to the sound
of our love
our sweet love
only a love that we made
Ever since you left..
It’s been a constant battle with sleep
Inevitably seeing you in my dreams
Uncertain of what’s worse to wake up from,
the nightmares about the world slowly coming to an end
or the dreams of you kissing my lips and never giving up on us
Ever since you left..
I refuse to let people in
I try to steer clear of conversations
Because I am terrified that I am the only one that holds on
I fear letting people in because I worry I will be forgotten
If I’m being honest,
I’m conflicted
I’ve begged God to return me to my home
Because I want to hear your lies again
I can find the prayer in them
After all, they were all I was being told
How could you blame me for falling when
My love, you were nothing other than fool’s gold
Dear boy,
I want to be friends with you, I really do, but my heart won’t let me. I want to meet you under the moonlight, to talk about music, films and the future, I want to laugh until we cry our chests out and we are unable to breath.
My mind tells me to go ahead and restart our friendship, but everytime you’re around my senses freeze and nothing goes right.
You probably think that I ghosted you, and I’m sorry that I messed up things between us. I’m sorry that I never told you how I really felt.
But I guess people moves on, you clearly did. It broke my heart to realize that, but you did. Now I’m sitting here feeling a well-known painful pressure in my throat and a stange relieve in my chest.
Your heart now belongs to another and my feet haven’t move a step forward since the day we ended. I miss you, and I’m sorry.
Yours,
Vanilla.
I’m kinda scared that one day you’ll wake up and not love me the same way I love you.