"cries out in pain" is my very same reaction to this, to them

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"cries out in pain" is my very same reaction to this, to them
So a friend of mine who is new to TMA mentioned Jon referring to Martin as an avatar in mag139. And I thought, well yeah, he's showing signs but Jon never refers to Martin as an avatar. So they showed me the portion and specifically the line "why were we chosen?" And
And I had a galaxy brain. I was sure Jon was talking about Agnes and himself but he does explicitly mention Martin in this paragraph and... Martin was in fact chosen. He was chosen by Peter Lukas and nobody knows that yet!!! No wonder Elias was so wary of meeting Jon in person! Only ONE encounter since his coma and Jon was already stumbling onto the fact Martin was chosen by Peter for the bet!!!!! Even if he didn't notice it! GAAAH
MAG139 - #0063011 │ Chosen
finally I get to learn more about Agnes Montague
aaaw, the power of love
John
please stop hurting yourself, John
“i need him to be okay. i just do”
MAG139 – Caso 0063011 – “Elegida”
Testimonio de Eugene Vandestock, sobre la creación de Agnes Montague, su vida, cuidado y muerte.
[Disclaimer/ Aviso] [MAG138] | x | [MAG140]
so jon’s in one of those “i recently caught feelings for my best friend and i do not like it whats the return policy” moods huh sjdkshdjsjd
(MAG117) MARTIN: I suppose you can get used to anything, but… [PAUSE] It feels different. I need them to be safe. I need him to be okay. … So–sorry, hum. I–I’m not afraid for me, though. Isn’t that weird…? […] I just… really hope everyone makes it back. … And I want to win on my own. Oh, and I hope the world doesn’t end. Obviously. [SIGH] Just… [SIGH] Just don’t die, Jon. … O–or Tim, or Basira, or… Daisy, I guess. Just… just everyone please, make it back home…?
(MAG139) ARCHIVIST: […] [SIGH] I’m just worried about Martin. … Christ… Every other Avatar gets to have their feelings… burned right out of them, but me? I’ve… just got to sit in mine. … I know he said he had everything under control. I need… to trust him; whatever he’s doing with Peter, he’s… he knows what he’s doing. Probably. I just– … I need him to be okay. I just do.
For people who want to relisten to the Hill Top Road episodes to put together some of the pieces I made a list of relevant episodes!
8 Burned Out (Construction of the house)
12 First Aid (Death of Diego Molina)
19 Confession I/ 20 Desecrated Host II (Father Burroughs exorcism of the house)
43 Section 31 (arrest of Diego Molina)
59 Recluse (Ronald Sinclair’s childhood in the house on Hill Top Road)
67 Burning Desire (Jack Barnabas’ courtship of Agnes Montague)
87 The Uncanny Valley (Jude Perry’s workings with the Stranger)
89 Twice as Bright (Jude Perry’s Statement)
114 Cracked Foundation (Anya Villette’s experience in the house on Hill Top Road)
Bonus: some episodes that deal with the Desolation in general, but don’t directly relate to the house or Agnes (that we know of, anyway):
37 Burnt Offering (Effect of the Desolation on Jason North, possibly a side effect of an attempt of revenge against Gertrude?)
55 Pest Control (Death of Arthur Nolan)
107 Third Degree (Unknown agent of the Desolation’s effect on a cleaner)