KPDH x My Demon
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KPDH x My Demon
𝐆𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐃 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓 - 𝐉𝐎𝐒𝐇𝐔𝐀 𝐇𝐎𝐍𝐆
IN WHICH You have a lot of standards to meet. You’ve always had. Your family, your company, your fans, they all expect the best from you. And while it is your company who signs your checks, you have yet to disobey your family. So, when your mother demands you go on a blind date to find yourself a competent husband to take over the family business, you listen. You go on a blind date and meet with the worst possible man you could imagine—Joshua Hong. Annoying, careless, Joshua, who manages to make an impression on you nonetheless. But you refuse to fall for him or his shenanigans, especially after the series of events following your first meeting.
pairing » demon!Joshua x fem!idol!reader genre » romance, stangers to lovers, bodyguard romance, my demon au featuring » Chaewon of le ssera (non idol), Lee Chan of svt (non idol), Kim Mingyu of svt (not idol), Choi Seungcheol (non idol)
contains » blood, graphic descriptions of violence, themes of stalking and obsessive fans, heavy on the sicko fans, reader’s mother sucks, Joshua may or may not be killing people, he stabs himself (he is okay), mentions of death of other people, traumatic past (for reader), they’re lowk just flirting all the time, religious themes a little (heaven and hell, angels and demons, the possible existence of god) smut warnings » shower sex, masturbation, fingering, slight breast play, unprotected sex (wrap it up guys), multiple orgasms, a hint of a blow job
word count » 34k
↪ izzy adds... This story is inspired by the kdrama MY DEMON. It is, however, not the show simply rewritten with Joshua as the main character. Reader and Do Dohee are different, their situations are different, and I only took inspiration from the show. Please don't go into this expecting everything that happens in my demon. Also, please read the warnings for this fic. There are a lot of things that could upset you so pay attention to them before you proceed.
With that being said, the fic is finally out <3 I had a lot of fun writing this and figuring out the story. It created some inside jokes and I'm so so happy I got to write this.
A huge shout out to @100vern for hosting the SVTLIX collab! A big thank you goes to everyone participating and especially to @straylightdream for this awesome banner!!
seventeen mlist | joshua masterlist
Despite being in the car with only one more person, it still feels as suffocating as it did sitting in a conference room with your entire family. Chaewon watches you through the rear view mirror but you don't pay her any attention, looking out the window at all the streets you pass.
Getting married is the last thing you want right now.
You still have so many goals you want to achieve before settling down, so many more songs to perform and fans to please. But like your mother loves to remind you as often as she possibly can, family comes first. And no matter how much you don't want to get married right now, you need to find someone who would be able to lead the company you tried so hard to run away from.
Managing an electronic store is the opposite of what you want to do with your life. You'd much rather pass the chain to whoever worked for your parents the longest and just keep performing on stage. That is where you belong. Under all the lights, with a microphone in your hands. Not in an aisle of TV screens and phones.
"How long is an appropriate time to stay in order not to be rude?" You wonder, still not taking your eyes off the window.
"Thirty minutes?" Chaewon suggests. "That should be enough to complete dinner and fulfill all expectations."
You hum in agreement, looking down at your phone to check the time. "You can go once you drop me off, Chae. I'll drive myself home after."
"Of course, miss," she nods. She is in no place to argue with you even if she wanted to anyway.
The first floor of the building is made as a parking lot which you are grateful for. If your mother doesn't care about what you want in life, at least she makes reservations in places secure enough for you not to worry about your career.
It's once you're out of the car and Chaewon is officially off the clock that you allow yourself to sigh. "I'm a call away if you need anything," she assures you, her smile painful as she crosses the space between you. You've known her for five years now, ever since you first joined your company. She's supposed to be your manager, but she's honestly your friend more than anything.
"It'll be fine. What's the worst that could happen? I just need to get this over with to get my mother off my back and then I'll be able to focus properly again. Practice is at noon tomorrow?" You ask to reassure yourself. She nods and that's all you need. "I'll see you tomorrow then."
Parting ways, you head to the elevator to get to the top floor where the restaurant is.
"We are sorry, ma'am, the place is all booked out for today," you are stopped as soon as you open the door.
"I know," you nod, looking around until you find the only other person in, relaxed on a couch. "I'm here to meet Mr…" you hesitate, realizing you weren't even told his name before they kicked you out of the door, claiming there is no time to waste. "To meet your customer."
The butler steps aside immediately. "My apologizes," he lowers his eyes, letting you walk past him. "I'll be there to take your order shortly."
You thank him briefly, taking in the decor as you head towards the only figure you see at the table. He's sitting with his back turned to you, his gaze locked on the newspaper he picked up earlier today.
"Hope you weren't waiting too…" your words trail off as you sit down on a chair opposite him and watch his dark eyes lift to meet yours, "…long."
You blink, the little raise of his eyebrow having you act up. Get it together. You curse at yourself, shaking your thoughts off and regaining your posture. You've been on many blind dates organized by your mother before. You know what to do.
It's just that they've never been this much of your type.
Fluffy black hair that cover the back of his neck, cut perfectly to compliment his other features. Dark eyes, defined jaw, and a simple cross necklace sitting under his white suit jacket. There is a brown watch around his wrist as well, your eyes instantly trailing all the veins he has.
"And you are?" His voice makes you snap out of it. Again. What is with you today?
Your brows furrow. "Don't tell me you weren't told who you were meeting." When he only stares back at you, still just as confused, you sigh, reaching your hand over to him in a polite manner. Your name slips past your lips as you wait for him to tell you the same while shaking your hand.
He doesn't. He glances down at your hand and then back at your face, showcasing his bad manners. Of course. If your mother finally found someone decent looking, he just had to be a terrible person. That adds up, doesn't it? "Your name," you prompt. "Or business card."
He assesses you once more before reaching into his suit pocket to pull something out of it, throwing his business card to you on the table. You scoff, already annoyed as you take it in your hand, flipping it over to look at it. "Joshua Hong?" You question and he nods, barely paying you any attention as he goes back to reading. "And you're the CEO of Hong F&B?"
If he's already managing one company, how do your parents expect him to take care of two if this blind date was to work out? It doesn't make any sense.
"Yes. Now that you've had your fill of my presence, can you go? If you can't see, I rented out the entire floor for myself and my company."
"Oh my god," the words are out of your mouth before you can stop them, a disbelieving laugh escaping. "This is a first," you shake your head. "Mother has really topped herself this time." Resting your hands on the table, you take a good look at him. "I didn't know they still made them this arrogant and self centered."
"Excuse you?"
Leaning back in your chair, you cross one leg over the other. "Still, since I promised I'll keep you company for a short while at least, I'll allow you those thirty minutes of my time. I'm leaving as soon as the clock hits nine."
He makes a show of himself closing the newspaper and leaving it beside him on the couch, making you roll your eyes. To think you thought he was attractive at first glance. "Suit yourself," he says, almost as if he saw this all as some sort of a challenge.
You sit quietly, both of you deciding to go with the cold shoulder as you eat your dinner. You catch your server's eyes on you every once and then, but every time he notices you looking back at him, he disappears as quickly as he appeared.
You have no doubt it looks weird from an outsider's point of view. Who even goes on dates like these? It's one thing to be rude to you, but to ignore you the entire time after? Your annoyance only keeps growing, feeling pettier and pettier each second that passes without him even trying to sooth you over. Why come out on this date if he knew he was going to be like this the entire time?
It's different in your case. You never wanted to be here. You were forced to come and you don't want anything from him. If anyone can be self centered and mean, it's you. Not him when he is trying to take over your company.
He should really get his shit together.
"Why are you even here?" You finally ask, dropping your utensils down and forcing your eyes to meet his. You're pissed with him—pissed at how uninterested he looks despite being in on this with your parents, pissed how unbothered your anger makes him, pissed how good he looks despite everything.
Raising his eyebrow, he finishes chewing on his food before answering. "Shouldn't I be asking that?"
You wish to wipe that look off his face. If he keeps annoying you, you as well might. Maybe you'll try to see how strong your right hook is.
"I'm not the one who wanted to go on a date with you," you scoff in response, picking your fork again and stabbing it into your meat.
"Date?" He questions, a mix of surprise and confusion lacing his tone.
"Are you— Are you seriously dense?" You ask back, unable to hold back.
"I'd say you are since you still didn't pack your stuff and left," he retorts back, now just as annoyed as you are as he leans back in his seat. "In case I didn't make it clear enough yet; I don't want you here."
"As if I wanted to be here!" God, he's got you good. You haven't been this triggered since your failed stage at Inkigayo where the staff completely messed up the music. "I'm the last person who wants anything to do with you or that stupid company!"
Joshua opens his mouth to answer, another retort hanging on the tip of his tongue, but before he can do so, another voice interrupts.
"We are sorry, we are fully booked—"
"There he is!"
You blink at the guys at the entrance, confused what's going on. You can't read Joshua's expression well, but you don't think he knows what's happening either. A group of men—in their late thirties if you had to guess—makes their way past the server who is trying his hardest to keep them out, heading straight for your table.
Joshua's eyes narrow at them as he scans them one by one, finally tilting his head to the side tiredly. "Why don't you go to the bathroom?" You don't think the question is directed at you since he doesn't even bother glancing your way, but you're shortly proven wrong when his gaze snaps to yours and he repeats himself.
"Unbelievable," you mutter, collecting your purse and phone before getting up from your chair and trying to make your way past the group of guys.
"Hold up, hold up, lady," one of them shakes his head, his voice filled with anger as he wraps his hand around your arm, keeping you from being able to leave.
"What are you—" Your brows furrow as you turn to face him, ready to brush him off. Punch or kick if you have to. With all the feelings growing inside you thanks to the worst dinner you've ever had, you won't be surprised if you actually do resort to violence with whoever thought it'd be a good idea to hold you like this.
"Why don't you get your hands off her?" Your gaze instantly falls to your side, having to look up to come face to face with your date. Of fucking course he is tall as well. You want to argue with him more, tell him to get lost and that you can handle yourself, but before you can do so, they are exchanging another set of words and then Joshua's hand is flying to his face. Ouch.
As soon as your arm is free again, you quickly rush away, heading straight for the exit. You don't know what's happening in that restaurant and you don't want to know. In fact, getting messed up in that is the last thing you want to do. You'd much rather sit through another date with Joshua than get involved in that. Not that you'd want to see him ever again. The first thing you'll do when you get home is call your mother and complain about her terrible taste in men.
It's only once you're in your car that you feel calm again, your hands gripping the steering wheel and your head falling down against it. "What the fuck was that?" You yell, raising your head again. The parking lot is empty, only a few cars standing around. You can imagine it's much fuller when they aren't dealing with dates like yours and the restaurant isn't all booked out.
You don't go home straight away, heading towards your company to get some training in and sweat the anger away. It's the best and only way you can think of right now. You need to challenge all these build up emotions somehow, and if you can't keep arguing with him, you'll have to do with dancing it off.
Greeting the night guard, you run into a few more people on your way to your practice room, doing your best to offer them all a smile. You hope it doesn't look too fake. You're all alone in your practice room, surrounded by mirrors and point marks on the floor. Setting up a camera on the side, you do a simple intro before you move on, playing your newest song. If nothing, at least you'll have more practice content for your channel.
Hours pass in the large room, but you still don't stop until you feel all your strength run out. Dropping in the middle of the floor, you close your eyes for a second, catching your breath again slowly. You should get home. You have practice in the morning and then a challenge to film. The more hours you'll get in tonight, the better.
It's weird. Something is wrong.
You feel it as soon as you step out of your car again and head into your house. From the outside, everything looks ordinary—lights turned off just like you left them, no movement on your garden, and everything quiet this late into the night. But you feel it. You swear you do.
Unlocking your front door carefully, you try your best to ignore the creeps you get. Flicking the light on as soon as you walk inside, you jump a little when you see a pair of shoes you don't recognize beside your heels. What the actual fuck?
If your brother is playing another one of his pranks on you right now, you swear you'll kill him the moment you come face to face with him. It's too late for this shit. It's one am, you need to shower, and get to bed. You don't have the energy or mood for any of this.
Looking around, you close the door behind you quietly, taking off your shoes like you normally would and heading into the living room. "Chan, stop playing with me, this isn't funny."
"I agree."
It's not Chan's voice you hear in response. It's not a voice of anyone you know. Quickly spinning around, you struggle to take out your pepper spray from your purse. Your eyes flicker all across the dark room, trying to make sense of anything—anyone.
The living room light turns on without you getting to the switch, shivers running through your entire body as you turn around once more, desperately trying to find whoever is in the house with you. Lord help me. It's the only thing you can think about, your desperation growing as your hope slowly dies. "Chan, this really isn't—"
"Chan this, Chan that." You hear his footsteps before you see his face, stepping back into one of your shelves and knocking over a vase in the process. "Careful," he shakes his head as he keeps stepping closer to you. Who the fuck is that and why is he walking around your house so carefree? "We don't want you stepping on it and getting a piece stuck in your precious foot."
"Who are you?" You yell after him, ignoring his previous comment. You keep moving away from him, heading towards the kitchen with your eyes locked on him, worried what would happen if you lost sight of him again.
"Don't you remember me?" He tilts his head, his expression full of hurt. "Minjae. We met on your fan meeting last month."
Oh he's got to be joking. This is supposed to be your fan? "Why are you here? In my house?" You try to sound as calm as possible despite feeling anything but. It's okay. You can do this. You need to distract him for a bit and call the police. It'll be okay then.
"What do you mean?" He blinks confusedly. "Why else would I be here than for you?" His smile sends another shiver down your spine. God. You need to find a way to call for help way faster. "We are meant to be," he states almost desperately. "I've known it since I first laid my eyes on you. There is no one better for you than me."
Your back hits your kitchen island, forcing you to a stop.
"Are you scared of me?"
"No!" You say quickly, not wanting to tick him off. Who knows what he'd do if he found out you're not as happy to see him as he is to see you. "I'm just— You surprised me! Of course I remember you, Minjae. How could I not?" Your voice shakes as the words leave your lips. You grip the island behind you, holding on for dear life as if it could save you. Anyone. If there is anyone who could save you right now…
"Why is everything always a mess when I see you?" A low grumble catches your attention, your eyes flickering to Joshua standing at the living room entrance. Joshua. Did you not close the door when you walked in? Has he been following you? God, is he with this freak?
Just what is with your luck today?
"Who are you?" Minjae turns to him defensively. Thank god. Not with him then. Still, that doesn't explain why he's at your house right now.
Even though, you don't think you're in a place to question that. As long as he can get you out of this situation, you don't care how he got here. "Joshua," you breathe out, everything about you desperate and pleading.
"You know this guy?" Minjae turns to you again, accusing. Crap.
"Kind— No! I mean no! I've only seen him on the TV," you try to excuse quickly.
Joshua steps closer to you without a single care about the other dude in the room, ignoring his yells after him to get away from you. A part of you is glad he does. Now that he is standing between you and your fan, you feel much safer. "Let's make a deal."
"What?" Your eyes widen. "Now? Don't you see there's—"
"I said get away from her!"
"Joshua!" You gasp when you see another one of your vases flying his way, only for him to raise his arm and snap his fingers as if that were to do anything. Your vase lands right on the kitchen island beside you in perfect condition.
Wait, what?
"Deal," he prompts.
You catch Minjae taking out a knife from his pocket over Joshua's shoulder, your panic growing. "Fine! Okay! Whatever you want!" You nod eagerly. "Just help me, please."
Joshua tilts his head from side to side as if to stretch, turning his back to you. "I don't usually get involved before getting a signature, but this guy gives me the creeps," he mumbles, crossing the room to get to the intruder.
You take your chance as Joshua makes himself busy and make your way past them, rushing to the window door connected to your garden. The police, you remember. Your hands shake as you try to get your phone out of your purse, your legs weak.
You get to the fence, leaning on it with one hand for more support while you try to open your phone with the other. You don't think you've ever been as scares as you are right now. Your fingers won't work properly, typing in the wrong pass code. God damn it, focus.
Glancing back at the house, your fear only grows when you don't catch a sign of anyone inside. You drop to the ground, unable to stay on your feet any longer. What are you going to do if Joshua is somehow involved after all? What if they are making up a plan how to kidnap you right now without causing a scene? What if there is someone else inside the house you haven't seen yet?
Quickly scanning your surroundings to check for anyone waiting to jump at you, you force your fingers to unlock your phone. Once that's done, dialing the police number is not as big of a struggle. You need to let them know what's happening. You need to make sure you aren't letting go of your possibly only chance at saving. You have no idea what Joshua's deal is, but you're not risking anything. Not when you got the chance to save yourself.
The call goes through, but you don't manage to say anything as your hand falls down to your side, your eyes glued to the man walking through your glass door. You know you should talk to the police. You know that's the only way of making sure nothing will happen to you. But as Joshua comes into your view again, glowing in the darkness of the night, you can't help but freeze.
He's got this weird pull to him. One that makes you forget everything about what's happening.
Offering you his hand, you feel your breath catch as you take it carefully.
The glass door slides open again and your eyes widen, the momentary feeling of comfort vanishing when you see Minjae running towards you at full force with a knife in his hands. God. Is this how you die? Closing your eyes, not wanting to look at his face when the knife comes, you drop Joshua's hand again, ready for the end.
But the knife doesn't come.
Your eyes slowly crack open, partly in surprise and partly in curiosity. How come nothing happened?
You learn why as soon as you open your eyes to find Joshua in front of you, his brows furrowed in pain. "Why did you— Joshua!" You panic, your hands trembling as you try to think of what to do. He falls to the ground in front of you, the same knife you thought was going to kill you now stabbed in his flesh. Oh god, oh god, oh god.
Pressing your hands to the wound, you desperately try to stop all the blood from leaving his body. Your eyes can't seem to settle, flickering all over him.
"No, no, no, stay still," you beg him as he turns over on his side. He doesn't listen to you at all through, wincing as he pulls the knife out of his body. "You're going to bleed out! You can't just—"
"Will you stay quiet for a moment?" He hisses at you, pressing his palm to his wound and closing his eyes.
You're not sure what he's trying to do because the only thing that happens is that his hand gets soaked in his blood. "What—" he coughs, the words catching in his throat as he feels the blood on his tongue. It's the first time in forever he's felt like this—weak—pain consuming his whole. Why is he not healing?
It's not the right time for "I told you so" though so you join him instead, pressing both of your hands over his, hoping to help a little. The police. Of fucking course.
"Help!" You yell into your phone lying on the ground. You're not sure when you managed to drop it. Probably somewhere between the second you saw Minjae and when Joshua was stabbed. "There's— I— I've been attacked and then— there is so much blood—"
You hear a faint response, taking one of your hands away from him while the other presses against the wound harder than before, putting the call on speaker. Thank god they didn't hang up on you when you weren't responding. You can only assume they heard the background noise and figured it wasn't a prank call.
"God," Joshua whines weakly but you don't pay him much attention, needing to get help for him as soon as possible. If you don't get a professional to him soon… you don't even want to think about what that'd mean.
"We need an ambulance immediately—" You yelp as Joshua grips your wrist, pulling it to himself. Turning your head to face him again instead of the phone, you let your eyes quickly scan his figure, wondering what he's doing. It's no time for games. No matter how much he has you questioning his motives and what he's doing at your house, you aren't letting him die.
"You…" his voice is so quiet you doubt if it's him speaking.
"Me?" You question, panicked.
Whatever he wanted to tell you, he doesn't finish, the rest of the sentence dying in his throat as his eyes close. No, no, no, no. You refuse to let it end like this.
You won't watch him die. You refuse to.
Joshua's head feels like it's been split apart.
His whole body hurts. Making out the faint noises in the background is hard. Opening his eyes is even harder. Is this what being dead feels like?
He's been dreading this his entire life. He's been escaping hell for over two hundred years, and it's a crazy guy with a knife that gets him in the end? He refuses to believe that.
But hell doesn't come. Instead of the heat he expects, it's cold that surrounds him, his body shivering. Instead of loud roars and the sounds of desperate screams, it's your soft voice that rings in his ears. And instead of seeing everyone he sent to suffer for eternity, he sees a white room and a doctor when he finally forces his eyes open.
What's going on?
He was convinced the knife in his back was the end of him. When he realized his tattoo and powers had disappeared, there was no hope left for him. There was no way he could have saved himself.
"Fucking hell," you breathe out when your eyes land on him, dropping back down to the chair you've been occupying all night, waiting for him to wake up.
"Far from there." Joshua's eyes close again, pain rushing through him. "I think."
"I need you to limit your movements to minimum, Mr. Hong," the doctor stops him before he can push himself up from the hospital bed, only then making him realize where he is. He is in no hell after all. He's in the hospital.
Because he couldn't save himself, he reminds himself. His powers are gone.
This is so much worse than hell.
"Give me your hand," he prompts, reaching for you, ignoring the doctor's orders.
"Why?" You frown, confused.
"Give me your hand," he repeats, this time more demanding. You hesitate as you offer him your left hand, only for him to brush it off. "The other one."
"Seems like nearly dying didn't make you any less of an asshole," you huff, giving him your right hand this time. He tugs you closer in an instant, ignoring your lost eyes and rolling your sleeve up. There it is. His little cross mark. And it's still resting on your wrist just like it was last night when he was unable to heal himself.
"How did you do this?"
"Did what?" You shake your head, letting your eyes drop to your hand, not understanding what he's talking about. Your eyes widen instantly. "Why is there a tattoo on my skin?" You gasp, forcing your hand away from him to look at it from up close.
"I'll leave the two of you alone for now," the doctor says, but neither you or Joshua are listening to him, both too focused on the magic mark.
"Stop rubbing it," Joshua hisses and your eyes flicker to his. "It's not a tattoo."
"You know something about this?" Your confusion only grows. "Oh my company is going to kill me! I can't have any visible tattoos. And my mom! God, she'll be furious when she finds out I inked my skin without her permission!"
"It is not a tattoo," he reminds you. "And it's mine," he reaches for your hand again. "So tell me how you managed to steal it from me."
"Steal it from you?" You scoff in amusement, finding him ridiculous. "I don't want your stupid tattoo!"
There is a strong pain in his back but he refuses to let go of your hand, holding you as close as he can. It's the only way he can think properly. Touching his mark like this.
His grip gets tighter as he desperately clings onto it, making your brows furrow. "Let go of me, Mr. Hong," you tell him, trying to pull your hand away. It doesn't work. "Mr. Hong," you plead again. Nothing. "Joshua!"
His eyes widen, almost as if your voice only reached him now. His grip loosens and you immediately pull your hand again, hiding it behind your back. Your eyes are filled with pain as you look at him, trying to make sense of what's happening. Nothing makes sense. From the moment he suddenly appeared in your home up to now. You can't explain it, but everything feels odd.
You hear the door sliding open and finally pull your gaze away from him, locking eyes with the one person you've been waiting to get here. Chaewon clears her throat as she steps inside, her eyes giving away how scared she is despite her trying to look indifferent. You can read her too well for that, though. "The detectives are looking to speak to you," she claims, stepping aside to create more space for them.
Before you can tell her to bring them in, two men are already walking in, notepads in their hands. You briefly remember one of them greeting you when you first got here last night, but you were so busy praying the doctors could still save Joshua that you couldn't say what he told you or what his name was.
"Officer Lee Seokmin. We met earlier," he offers you a smile as if he could read your mind, extending his hand towards you. You stand up from your chair, not giving Joshua another glance as you join the police officers.
"Officer Xu Minghao," the other, slightly taller, officer greets you as well. "We need to take your statements about last night's incident. Separately if possible."
"The more you'll tell us, the easier it will be to identify the suspect and take legal maters."
"We'll help in any way we can," you nod quickly.
"I'm out of here as soon as I give you that statement," Joshua shakes his head, pushing himself up on the bed.
You can clearly see the panic in Officer Lee's eyes as he rushes towards him, trying to help. "Mr. Hong, you shouldn't be moving much. I will talk with you here while Mr. Xu talks to your girlfriend."
"We are not together," you both tell him at the same time and you shoot him a look. The fact you are offended by someone believing you are with him is one thing, but why would he make it sound like being with you would be something terrible?
"Oh, that's my mistake," Officer Lee apologizes quickly. "But to be frank with you, that information only puts more questions in my head."
Well, maybe you'll be able to get your answers as well. You still can't figure out how Joshua got into your house at the exact time you needed someone to save you. As grateful to him as you are, he has a lot of explaining to do.
"Are you positive you're okay?" Chaewon asks you for what feels like the hundred time, walking with you to her car to get you to the company and then your new apartment.
When you gave her a call last night after making it into the hospital, she did everything she could to prevent more situations like this. But you're not naive. You know you can't just escape this in the blink of an eye. If you could, you would have done it a long time ago.
No matter how much she or the rest of your staff tries, there is no way to control every single fan and make sure none of them are sick in the head or wanting to kill you. Both attributes you believe the guy that broke into your house last night possessed. You should have been more careful. You loved that location.
"I'm all good," you tell her again. "Fortunately, I made it out without a single scratch unlike someone," you mumble, your smile disappearing at the memory of you trying to hard to stop the bleeding. "Can we make it up to him somehow? A financial reward or something?"
"I've taken care of that already," she assures you. "I've gotten Mr. Hong's contact information and promised a compensation for all the trouble he went through as well as gave him my dearest apologies."
"Good," you nod, more to yourself than to her. Sliding into the passenger seat, you wait for Chaewon to join you so you can go. "Has the police said anything to you?"
"I'm sorry," she shakes her head. "They assured me they'll give me a call once they have anything, though."
"Okay," you nod again, the entire situation suddenly making you feel small.
You couldn't do anything last night. You barely managed to call the police while Joshua was saving your life, and then when it came to it, it was him again who got hurt. As if that already wasn't bad enough, now you just have to sit back and wait for them to figure it out on their own? You want to help. However you can.
"Your mother called me this morning," Chae tells you as she drives off into the busy street. "She wanted to know about your date, and when I told her what happened last night, she demanded you give her a call first thing. As much as I'd like to give her the benefit of the doubt, I don't think it's about your well being, though."
A heavy sigh leaves your lips. "I'll call her when I settle in. I can't deal with her before I have my coffee."
"If you'd like I could give her a call instead and claim your busy schedule doesn't give you any time in the near future to see her or any other dates?"
"It's okay," you shake her head. "We both know that wouldn't stop her. I'll call her."
Just like you said you would, a phone call to your mother is the first thing you do as soon as you've made yourself a cup of coffee and settled in the corner of your new couch.
Chaewon found a new apartment for you just a few blocks from your company, making it more comfortable for you as well as making it more accessible in case of an emergency similar to last night. It's nice. Not as big as your previous house was, and you certainly don't have a garden on this top floor, but it'll more than do.
It's a modern style place with four separate rooms, filled with all kinds of memories of your career. The decorators must have had fun while you were in the hospital. All of your previous albums line a bookshelf in the living room, and there are posters of you on the walls—ones you are sure to take down before night comes around. As much as you're proud of what you've built, you don't need to look at old pictures of yourself on stage every morning.
You're glad for the full length glass doors that lead to your balcony. If there is one thing you would have missed about your old place, it'd be the ability to look outside at the night sky whenever you want. You're glad they managed to keep that in.
You look out as you make yourself more comfortable, waiting for the call to go through. The sky is clear this time around, no clouds in sight. It's starting to be warm out again.
"Where have you been all day?" Is the first thing you hear when she picks up.
Closing your eyes, you prepare for the mental slap this phone call will give you. "The hospital."
"I thought you weren't hurt?"
"I wasn't," you roll your eyes. "I'm all good, thanks for asking. I stayed in with Joshua so I could make sure he was alright as well. It was my fault after all."
"Joshua? Who is that?" You can hear the disapproving look on her face as she speaks. It's the same look she used to give you whenever you mentioned a boy she didn't personally hand pick when you were younger.
"Joshua Hong? The CEO of Hong F&B you set me up with?" You frown back. "Have you forgotten already?"
"How are you talking to me right now?" She snaps and you pull the phone away from your ear, seriously debating just hanging up on her. Her next words stop you, though. "I thought I finally put some sense into you yesterday just for you to not show up on your date? Do you know how embarrassed I was when I got the call earlier?"
"I went on the date," you argue, confused. "With Joshua. We ate together and then he was the one to save me from that stalker."
"Joshua this, Joshua that," she huffs, annoyed. "Mr. Choi was waiting for you for two hours before he left! He didn't want to make a big deal out of it but his father called me to let me know. Thank god he did. What were you even thinking?"
"Who's Mr. Choi?"
"Choi Seungcheol? The man you were supposed to go on a date with?" Her annoyance only grows, making sure you know she's tired of having to explain everything to you.
"Joshua was the one waiting at the restaurant, though." The longer you talk to her, the less sense it all makes.
"The one on main street?"
"What? No. This is the location you gave us," you claim, quickly sending her the restaurant address.
"That is not the place I gave your little manager. Did she manage to mess this up as well?"
"Stop putting Chaewon in your mouth."
She scoffs on the other side of the phone. "Why don't you just date her if she's so important to you and cut us off completely?"
"I as well might," you mumble back, tired of this all.
But she doesn't stop. "I do everything for you and your future and this is how you repay me? You don't listen! How many times have we told you not to mess up your life and stay in our company? How many times have I tried my hardest to make you happy just for you to dismiss me like some stray cat?"
There it is. The victim card she loves to play. "I'm hanging up, mom," you announce, not giving her a chance to answer before throwing your phone on the other side of the couch with a sigh. You can't wait to go to sleep.
Reaching for your cup of coffee, your eyes land on your right wrist and the mark. How on Earth did you come to it again? Right, there is no explanation. Other than Joshua being a wizard who can just place a tattoo on someone without them noticing, of course.
The memory of Joshua on the ground flashes through your mind and you close your eyes shut, trying to shake it off. You need to think about something else. Anything.
Sitting on your date with Joshua is the first thing that comes to mind, a tiny smile spreading on your lips as you think about your arguments. He's a prick. A weirdo with no manners, and quite definitely your type.
You're not sure if you want to see him again.
Your phone rings, forcing you out of your thoughts. If it's your mother again you might as well call the creep from yesterday and tell him to finish the job.
Leaning forward to grab it back with a groan, you scan the unknown number before picking up. "Hello?" You ask confusedly. Who would even be calling you right now? When Chaewon found out what happened last night, she canceled all schedules today, so no one should be needing you.
"It's Joshua," he says simply and your frown deepens.
"How did you get my number?"
"Your manager was trying to save my number, talking about some money, and I saw your contact."
Did you mention that he's weird yet? It feels like you don't say it enough.
"So you, what? Stole it from her? Do you have no sense of personal space?"
"You weren't asking me that when I moved in front of you to save your life." You can practically see the smile on his face, clearly proud of himself for making you feel bad.
"I'm sorry for getting you involved, again. Even though, if I'm honest, I'm still not sure how you got there or what you were doing at my house." You stretch your legs on the couch, bringing your coffee to your lips as you wait for his answer.
"I had an inkling."
"About?" You raise an eyebrow, doubting him.
"A desperate person willing to sell their soul."
"You make no sense," you shake your head, deciding to ignore the bullshit explanation he just gave you. He surely does have the mind of a poet to be speaking like this. "What does that make you? A superhero saving the world?"
"The opposite, in fact."
The villain of the story. Sure, why not? Despite having no idea what those little metaphors mean, you don't plan on popping his bubble or anything. If he wants to play the bad guy, then you're not going to stop him.
"Is this why you called? To tell me how terrible you are?"
"No," Joshua rolls his eyes. "I want to meet up. I'm out of the hospital so let's go out."
Go out? With Joshua? What?
No is the right answer. Absolutely not is what you should respond. Going out is the last thing you want to do today, and with him on top of everything? Why should you? Your date with him was terrible and the two of you only argued— Fuck. The date you weren't supposed to be on.
God, you need to apologize.
With how many times you've already said sorry to him, you might as well just drop to your knees and beg for forgiveness now.
Screw you blind dates and screw you mom. Had it not been for her demands on setting you up with someone, you wouldn't be in this situation at all.
You would also likely be dead.
A heavy sigh leaves your lips as you look at the current time. "They let you out already?"
"Sure did," he hums. "The doctor kept saying something about a miracle but I'm pretty sure it was because of you."
Huh? Since when is it so hot here?
You feel your cheeks heat up, unsure what he means. Is he flirting with you? Maybe it's the consequence of yesterday's trauma and you're hearing things. That would make much more sense than Joshua Hong—the same guy who would die if he were to be nice to you on your date—asking you out and flirting with you.
But then again, if you think about it, he did save you more than once already.
Maybe he wasn't just all bad after all.
"Okay," you nod.
"Okay?"
"Yeah, I'll meet you for dinner."
Slipping out of your car, you scan your surroundings to see if Joshua is already here. You don't catch him anywhere. You're not sure if you like the place he wanted to meet at. It's public. Maybe a little too public to your liking. And while that should be technically perfect since you both have witnesses and everyone can see what you're doing, both of those advantages feel a little unfortunate at the same time.
A part of you wishes you could be alone with him.
"Has no one taught you not to let a lady waiting?" You cross your arms in front of your chest as soon as you see him walking towards you. "Then again, it would be on brand for you."
He ignores your comment, grabbing your wrist before you can realize what's going on, and tugging you back towards his car. "We are going on a trip," he explains simply.
"What— hold on, Joshua—" Despite your mouth trying to protest, your legs keep following him as if it were the easiest thing they've ever had to do. "My car!" You remember. "I have my car there," you try pointing towards the parking spot but he doesn't even glance back.
"You can get your car later," he brushes you off. "I need you right now."
It's as if he had you under some sort of spell, all the reasons why you shouldn't just follow him—barely an acquaintance—anywhere he wants disappearing in the blink of an eye.
Your eyes flicker around the place to make sure no one is following you or any rumors are about to start, letting him take you to his car. You dip into the passenger seat, scanning the interior. The display is huge, taking up the entire length. He's got the radio on but the volume is set so low you barely hear it. Pushing your seat forward a bit, you get a good feel on the leather covering it, humming in satisfaction.
You quickly shake yourself out of it. You're not supposed to be appreciating his choice of vehicle right now.
So instead of appreciating it, you decide to analyze it instead.
The car screams luxury in every shape and form. It fits him perfectly. Without knowing anything about the brand or model, you can tell he likes being able to look at what his money bought him. You don't blame him in that sense. What you can blame him about, though, is how entitled he is because of it.
You hate this car already.
"Which brand is this?" You wonder when he joins you, deciding not to focus on the fact he could literally kidnap you right now if he wanted to. Maybe you should send Chaewon a quick text.
"Hongqi H9," he answers without pondering over your question much. You hum, making a mental note to never buy that car. As much as your body seems to love having him close and the thrill of it, your brain is on your side and wants nothing to do with him. If only your mind was strong enough for your body to listen as well.
He doesn't say anything else after, driving off. You look out of the window, making sure to watch carefully where he is headed. You can't tell him no no matter how hard you try, though. So after a few minutes, you finally ask. "Where are you taking me?"
"I have a contract that expires today."
You frown, averting your eyes from the outside and staring at him. "What now?"
"A contract. Surely you know what that is."
"I'm not stupid," you roll your eyes, annoyed. There it is. You like this reaction much more than the one you had before when he used his sweet words to lure you in. "What on Earth do you need me for?"
"My powers are gone," he mumbles as if that were to make any sense to you. You watch as his hands grip the steering wheel tighter, making sure to keep his eyes on the road and not look at you. You tilt your head to the side. Okay. Maybe this isn't some sick joke he is playing on you. He looks seriously pissed. "And for some stupid reason—" he takes a deep breath, trying to steady himself, "You have them."
"Joshua, I bet you sound really incredible in your own head and that these metaphors make sense to you but—" You don't get to finish your sentence as he reaches for your right wrist, leaning all over the consol to get to you. Your eyes widen, panic over him not having a proper control of the wheel taking over you for a split second. But then the car keeps going in a straight line, no dangerous slip ups or anything.
"I have no idea why they suddenly jumped to you, but I can't use them without holding you." His eyes look tired. You don't even think he's angry anymore, he just seems exhausted. "Trust me, I tried," he sighs, letting his eyes close for a second. The panic settles in you all over again. How the hell is this car still going safe and steady?
"Joshua, the car—"
"The car won't crash as long as I'm holding your wrist," he assures you, way too calm for your liking. No matter what he believes, what metaphors he is spitting at you hoping you'd understand, this doesn't make any sense. "What do I need to do to have you believe me?"
"Let's start by you paying attention to the road—" Doing the exact opposite of what you just asked him for, he lets go of the wheel completely, leaning back in his seat and gripping your wrist tightly. You watch as the wheel turns on it's own, the car taking a left turn. What the fuck? No, this doesn't— this isn't— "What the fuck?" You breathe out finally.
"Will you finally listen or do I need to let go of your hand and crash the car first?"
Okay, you need to relax. Your eyes flicker all over his calm self, trying to mimic it. The car isn't crashing, you tell yourself. You have no idea how, but he's got it under control. You'll live. "Okay so," you swallow all your worries, turning to face him fully and avoid looking at the road. "What the fuck?" You repeat your previous question, now actually willing to hear his answer.
"I'm not lying to you," his eyes meet yours, doing their best to convince you. "This mark—this tattoo like you like to call it—is not just some ink on your skin. It's mine. And it carries everything I exist for."
So maybe you've gotten Joshua Hong wrong. Maybe he isn't a spoiled brat who never had to work a finger in his childhood which caused him to grow into an asshole. Maybe he is just a mentally ill psycho. That would explain everything, wouldn't it?
But the longer you look into his eyes, the harder it is to think he doesn't believe with every inch of his soul that what he says is true. What if it is the truth? What if, by some sick twist of the universe, the mark on your wrist does have powers than are now in your body. What if he does have powers? What if there is an entire new world beyond what you've known and trusted your entire life?
You don't say anything else. You can't. The words won't leave your mouth. Instead, you lean back in your seat, staring mindlessly on the road ahead as Joshua drives the car to who knows where—still refusing to put his hands on the wheel.
The car comes to a sudden stop after taking a swift turn. It's only then that you blink out of your thoughts, quickly scanning your surroundings. You're parked in front of a judo studio. Huh? You look at Joshua to question why he took you here, but before you can voice your curiosity, he is leaning over your side, making a little finger gun and whispering "bang."
Your eyes trail his, landing on a group of four guys standing in front of the entrance. They each have their own gym bag over their shoulder, laughing as soon as they see you in the car. Based on Joshua's proud grin as he leans back in his seat again, you have a hunch they aren't laughing at you but at him. Glancing back at them to apologize, your eyes widen in horror as you watch one of them fall to the ground. "What—" The rest of the men quickly gather around the fallen one, asking what's happening, asking the same you're wondering as Joshua starts the car again and quickly drives off.
"Did you just kill the guy??" You question, petrified.
"The terms of our deal came to an end," he says simply. "He killed himself."
You finally tear your hand away from him, hiding it in your lap. He quickly grabs the steering wheel again, forced to actually drive instead of just using his—your?—powers. "Did he?" you ask in disbelief. "Is that what would have happened if I signed the contract last night? You would have saved me just to kill me right after?"
Joshua's grip on the wheel tightens, his knuckles turning white. You wonder what's going on in his head. "I provide offers—solutions to problems, chances at brighter futures, money, you name it—in exchange for the soul. People get ten years of the life they want, they get to live out their dreams, their desires, and then their souls go to where they belong."
"And where would that be?"
"Hell."
Your mouth closes as soon as he gives you an answer. You think back to the man, wondering what could have possibly been worth shortening his life like this. Surely Joshua must have stated the terms of the deal beforehand. Surely he had to know what he was getting himself into.
Just like you did? A voice in the back of your head speaks. Your throat feels dry.
"Who was he?" You break the silence.
A part of you expects the obvious answer—for him to tell you he doesn't know, doesn't care. Instead, his voice bubbles in your ears again. "When I fist met him, he was a street fighter getting involved with people that would have easily made his life far worse than hell is. He was suspended from his old judo when he almost killed an opponent in a match. It resolved to him picking fights anywhere he went instead."
Oh. You try answering, even though you're not sure what you want to say, only for him to continue. "I sense the feeling of desperation," he explains. "I sensed it on you last night, and I sensed it on him those years ago when I found him in the middle of a bar fight, about to run out of his luck and die. I made sure he lived and could compete under judge's eyes again. He's been winning tournaments in this judo since then."
"You saved him from the streets," you think out loud.
"I wasn't doing it to help him," Joshua claims, but you still feel like a part of him did. Like it wasn't just for his own good—for whatever it is that he gets out of these deals.
"What are you?" You ask, turning to face him. You look at him for the first time since he started driving off, scanning his features. "An angel?"
His eyes meet yours briefly, "Angels never come to save you, darling."
Joshua dropped you off right beside your car again. He suggested driving you home, but you insisted. You need to clean your head and a little drive around the city is more than great for that. Your car is certainly smaller than his—not because you couldn't afford it, but because you never wanted anything more—less modern too, but it's perfect for rides alone. People expect for idols to be driving in more expensive cars, but you like falling into place with everyone else. No need to be extraordinary.
It's late, the sky no longer the bright blue it was during the day, stars decorating every bit. You don't get to look at them much, though. You only look at the road ahead of you and go over your earlier conversation with Joshua. The terms of our deal came to an end. He killed himself.
My powers are gone. For some stupid reason, you have them.
I sense the feeling of desperation. I sensed it on you last night.
Everything he told you today rings loud and clear in your head. You go over them, break the sentences apart and restructure them again. Nothing comes up. You can't change the meaning of what he said in order to make more sense of it. There is no single scientific answer to this, and it makes you feel like you're going crazy.
Angels and demons. Heaven and hell. Good and bad. You never thought much about it. Why would you? The life after always seemed so far away. But now…you can't help but wonder. Wonder what awaits you, how Joshua falls into all of this, and if you've done everything you could right.
You're so lost in your own thoughts, driving around for what might as well be hours. Thank God you filled up your tank just last week. Should you even be thanking God? Can you? Your eyes instinctively fall to your right wrist, to the black cross mark on there.
You don't let yourself get distracted for too long, checking your mirrors again and paying attention to the road. You should get home.
But it doesn't feel right.
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. The voice in your head won't stop, making you frown.
Something is wrong. What though?
Checking your map, you assure yourself you didn't drive somewhere too far away. Looking at your gas icon, you make sure you aren't about to run out. The road ahead seems clean, no other cars in sight that could cause you to get into a traffic jam. There is a car behind you, but it's been there for a while, so it's nothing out of the ordinary either.
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.
Your eyes widen. How long has the car been following you for?
You take the first left you can, checking your mirrors to see if he's still behind you.
He takes the same left.
Fuck.
You try slowing down, hoping that maybe he'll get bored and overtakes you, but not even the difference in speed stops him. You hold the wheel with one hand, doing your best to make sure you're not going off the road as you switch from your phone maps to your contacts. Joshua's number is the first you see, and you don't hesitate for a second before calling him.
He picks up on the second ring, his voice echoing in the car. "Your powers," you blurt out instead of hello. "Did your sixth desperation sense jump onto me as well?" Joshua frowns on the other side of the call, questioning what you mean. "Because I can really feel my own desperation right now."
"What's going on?" He asks, the switch in his tone obvious. "Are you okay?"
You're not sure if his concern comes from the mark of his you carry or genuine worries for your well being, but you don't question him right now. "Someone is following me."
"You're still not home?"
"I needed to clear my head," you explain. "I've been driving around since you dropped me off. I'm not sure— he's been behind me for some time, though. I'm going in circles so it doesn't make any sense."
"Don't drive home," he advises. "Where are you? I'll come get you."
"I'm," you look around, not sure yourself. "I'm a few blocks from the JYP building."
"Alright, drive around for a bit more and then meet me there. I can get there in fifteen minutes."
"Are you sure it'll be okay?"
"You're safe," he assures you. "I'm on the phone if you have doubts."
You nod, forgetting he can't see you over the call. "Joshua?"
"Yeah?"
"Thank you."
Just like he told you so, you decided to drive around for a few more minutes, your anxiety getting worse with each turn the black SUV took after you. But you made it to the JYP building in exactly fifteen minutes, just like Joshua told you to. You parked your car at the last open spot in the front, watching as whoever was driving the car kept on going, taking the first right he could find.
Your fingers hover over your phone screen, wanting to get Joshua on the line again. Before you can do so, a knock on your car window startles you.
All your worries wash away as your eyes lock on a familiar figure, Joshua standing outside your car in all his glory, a simple white sweater and dress pants on. He changed in the while you haven't seen him. You roll your window down, taking down the barrier between you. "Hi," you breathe out in relief.
"Hey," he offers you a small smile. You blink up at him, your eyes scanning the new look you've just discovered. Is this the first time he smiled at you? It doesn't reach his eyes completely but it's a step forward, you think. Not that you'd want a step forward. Even though, you're not sure if the option of never seeing him again is still available now that you apparently possess his powers. "Get out, I'll drive you home."
You arch your eyebrows at him and he rolls his eyes. "Or if you'd like to keep driving and try your luck, I can go home."
"No!" You shake your head quickly. "What about my car, though?"
"Have someone pick it up for you later."
"What if he breaks in here or something?" You argue.
"If you can't buy a new one I can get you one," he claims as if it wasn't a big deal. As if he had money to throw around without a problem. Maybe he does. You don't even want to take a guess at his status.
"Why?"
"Why what?" He tilts his head, eyeing you as if you were the confusing one.
"Why are you doing this? Helping me so much?"
It seems to confuse him even more, his smile turning into a grimace. "Have you already forgotten?"
"Forgotten what?"
"My mark."
Right. Of course. What other reason would he have to come rushing to you across town because you are convinced someone is tailing you.
Turning your engine off, you motion for him to step aside so you can get out of your car. You make sure there isn't anything important your stalker might find liking in before locking the car behind you, following Joshua into his Hongqi.
It's the same moment Joshua drives off that you catch a glimpse of a male figure walking around the JYP building, hood over his head and hands tugged into his pocket. He keeps glancing around, as if to check if anyone else is nearby. You swallow a lump in your through as you watch him head towards your car through the window, your nerves only getting worse.
You've got too used to the quiet. If this happened last year, you would have just called Chaewon and asked her to change your address again. But it's been so long since you last dealt with with something at this extend that you completely forgot the anxiety it leaves you with, making it so much worse. A weird fan here and there happens, and you've gotten used to that. But it's been over a year since you last had someone follow you. You're not sure what changed then, when the stalking behavior stopped, and you're not sure what changed now that they're back, but no part of you likes it. Two so early after themselves makes it so much weirder.
You don't talk to Joshua except for giving him your new address and making him promise this information stays between the two of you, opening your contacts again to reach your manager.
Chaewon picks up on the first ring, just like always. "No, yeah, I'm okay. Kind of. No, you don't have to worry," you assure her while shaking your head. "I just need someone to pick up my car in the morning and make sure there aren't any tracing devises attached or anything. No, Chae, I promise I'm okay. I'm with Joshua. Yes, Mr. Hong."
Joshua glances at you briefly at the mention of his name but doesn't interrupt your conversation. "Someone was tailing me so he suggested I park at the JYP building and he picks me up. I called him. No, I'm pretty sure he isn't a stalker as well," you roll your eyes despite not being certain in your answer. But what could he possibly get out of following you? He might be unusual, but what dude that thinks he's the demon isn't?
"Want to assure my manager you aren't going to kill me?" You ask him, holding back a giggle. You put the call on speaker when he gives you a nod in return, holding it high enough for the speaker to catch his voice.
"I have no intentions at murdering someone tonight," he says, keeping his eyes on the road. "I'm not a murderer." This time, as he speaks, he meets your eyes and you know he's referring back to your earlier conversation. The terms of our deal came to an end. He killed himself.
"Thank you for ensuring she is safe, Mr. Hong," she sighs, relief clear from her tone. "The entire staff team is grateful to you for everything you're doing."
"Alright, no need to raise his ego with this," you stop her before she can start praising him for breathing. You know she wouldn't go that far and what she says is valid, but you feel to embarrassed to have him listen to more. "Can you get someone to get my car? I'm just hoping it stays safe."
You stay on the phone with her for a while longer, only hanging up once Joshua parks in front of your new apartment building. You step out, lingering at the door as you meet his eyes again. "Thank you. For everything."
He nods, not giving you the pleasure of smiling again. "Call me tomorrow when you're free."
"Why?"
"So we can figure out how I can get back what's mine."
You fight the urge to sigh, nodding instead. It's the least you can do. He did save you twice already. Three times, if you count the weird encounter at the restaurant. "Good night, Joshua."
He hums, "Night."
Company meetings might be your least favorite parts of the job. This one is bearable, it's for your safety after all, but you can't say all meetings are like this. Most of them just feel unnecessary and like a waste of your practice time.
"It's getting out of hand."
"It was out of hand when someone broke into her house."
"Have there been any recent threats online we should trace back?"
"We need to double the security. She shouldn't be alone anymore."
Your eyes snap up to Chaewon when she adds her opinion to the conversation, shaking your head quickly. You value your alone time too much for that. Is there no other solution? She knows how much you appreciate the free time you get and opportunities, which only answers your previous question. If there was any other option she wouldn't be saying this.
"Joshua," you blurt out quickly, joining the conversation for the first time since you started. "He can accompany me."
"Who?" Eyebrows are raised in a question and you struggle to speak again. You should have thought this through before.
"He… We've been on a date before." Kind of? It's not a lie, is it? Technically it was a date even though you were never supposed to be in the restaurant with him. "He was the one who was with me when the intruder appeared and he came for me yesterday as well."
The looks the staff around exchanges are all uncertain, clearly not liking the idea of letting in someone from the outside to look after you. "I've met Mr. Hong before. He does not seem dangerous," Chaewon tells them but you both know she is not as sure in her words as she'd like to be.
You don't tell them he is too invested in the mark you carry to hurt you. Instead, you settle for a more believable reasoning. "We'll be spending more time together either way, and it'll be more comfortable for both of us if there isn't anyone from the company following us all the time. I'm sure you understand that," you give them a look that suggests there a lot more between you and Joshua than actually is, hoping that could work.
"Are you sure about this, Miss?" Chaewon is the first one to speak, but everyone follows right after, repeating the same question.
"I am," you nod. "We'd make it official. Make him my personal bodyguard. He'll be able to protect me at all times." You're not sure if that's even possible, if he can make himself available from his own work and keep by your side. If he wants to keep his precious little tattoo safe, then he should.
"This Joshua," a staff whose name you don't remember clears his throat. "Is the real deal?"
"We plan on continuing to see each other," you assure them. "If he's my bodyguard, it also won't raise questions in the pres when we are together. There are only pros to this."
"I'll arrange a meeting with Mr. Hong and see what we can do," Chaewon offers you a smile, one that tells you just how surprised she is by you. You're not sure if it's because you just told the entire staff team that you are seeing Joshua or because of how engaged you were in a meeting for the first time in months.
"Perfect. Shall we call it a day then?"
You don't wait for their answer, collecting your things and heading back to your practice room. As soon as the door shuts behind you, you take out your phone and dial Joshua's number.
"Off work already? Give me ten minutes and I'll pick you up," he asks instead of a greeting.
"Hello to you too," you shake your head. "And no. I'm only now starting my dance practice. I'll be here for a few more hours before we can go do whatever you think will reverse this sick joke."
"What is it then? Don't tell me you have another stalker on you."
"Don't even joke about that," you warn him. "If someone follows me as I leave today I will curse your whole bloodline."
He laughs. A sound so pretty and special your brain categorizes it as a starting addiction.
You are quick to snap out of it, shaking the thoughts off and burying them deep inside. You don't need to be thinking about how good his laugh sounds or how you want to hear it again.
"If there is another stalker, I'll just take care of him for you. You just have to let me hold your hand."
If anyone else overheard your conversation, they would probably think Joshua is smitten by you. It sounds so innocent, a boyfriend flirting with his girlfriend, saying he'll save the day if his lover just lets him hold her hand for a moment. Had you not known better, you might fall for it as well. But if Joshua managed to do anything in the short while you've known him, it's convince you that he only cares about himself and his powers. It's an inconvenience that his powers are now in your hands—quite literally—and he has to care for you as well.
Had it not been for the stupid mark, he would have been long gone from your life.
"I kind of threw you under the bus in my meeting just now," you finally tell him the reason you called as you go take a seat on the large couch opposite the window lining a whole wall. "And I really hope you don't do the same to me and agree to help."
"Help with what?" He sounds skeptical. You don't blame him. You would feel the same way.
"Be my bodyguard."
"No," he scoffs immediately, not giving you a chance to explain yourself.
"Please," you beg. "You need this as much as I do. If you don't take the position they'll have someone else fill in the spot and there won't be a chance for you to try and figure out what happened or how to have everything go back to normal. There will be someone on my side all the time and I won't be able to meet you properly again."
It's quiet on his side of the line as he thinks about it. It's a shitty situation either way, but only one scenario make life a lot less miserable for the both of you. You can help him and he can help you. It's the only way.
"What does being your bodyguard mean for me?"
"You get to carry a gun around?" you offer. "I think, maybe. I'm not actually sure," you mumble, so quietly you're not sure if he can make the words out. You don't want him to decide not to. You need him on the job. "And I'll be forever grateful to you?"
He doesn't shut you down right away like before, and you take that as a good sign. "I'm assuming your assistant will want to call me?"
"Chaewon, yes. And she is my manager, not an assistant."
"Same thing," he brushes you off. "Alright, I'll have the talk with her. I'll tell her I'm the best for the job or whatever."
A smile spreads on your lips. "Thank you! Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!"
"Okay," your name leaves his lips as he laughs at your reaction, the sound even more beautiful than last time. "Calm down. Don't you have to dancing to do or something?"
You laugh with him, relieved to have that taken care of as you hang up the call. You look at your phone screen for a second, staring at the call history. It's a while since you had someone else there other than Chae or your mother. Deciding he deserves to get his number saved, you add a new contact, your fingers hovering hesitantly over the name section. After giving it a second thought, you type in Joshua the Demon and save it.
If anyone sees and asks, you'll just turn it into an inside joke between lovers. Maybe you'll claim he calls you an angel. Maybe you'll complain he snores so bad it makes you think a demon possesses him.
Somehow, both options put a smile on your face.
You leave your phone on the couch, starting the music and getting into position. You'll practice for a while alone before your choreographer comes in. She should be here any minute now.
You're exhausted, sweating, and probably smell terrible when your choreographer calls the end of practice because Joshua decided to pay you a visit. You offer her a brief smile with your goodbye, getting back up on your feet. You fix your shirt—definitely not because you'd want to look your best when seeing him—as you meet his eyes, offering him the same smile.
"Hey, you uhm… talked to Chaewon?" Jesus. Since when are you this awkward around him? Just two days ago you were drowning in the urge to punch his face and now you're practically stumbling over your words? It must be the exhaustion. Practice drained you today. There were multiple changes in the choreography you needed to get down, and once you started pairing singing with the dance it was even worse.
"I did," he nods. "Just now." He searches for something in his pants pocket, having you blink curiously. You make use of that little time he gives you to admire his clothing. Not admire, you quickly tell yourself. Assess. That's a better word.
He's dressed for the job. A well tailored, black suit hugs his skin, the cross necklace he had when you first met him now replaced with a black tie, adding to the security look. It's the same attire you've seen most of the bodyguards at the company wear, but something tells you this piece was already sitting in his closet before he got the job. It makes it so much more attractive. "Got this little thing after signing a few papers." He takes out his earpiece and swings it on his fingers. A soft laugh escapes your lips at the sight.
"Aren't you supposed to be wearing that?"
"So I've been told," he shrugs, letting his eyes wander around the room. "I've also been asked if I am willing to move to a room in your apartment."
"What now?" You blink, pushing all the exhaustion aside. "Did Chaewon suggest that?"
He waves his hand in the air, as if to shut the conversation down. "I told them our relationship isn't at that stage yet and I'd rather just rent out my own apartment in the building." He walks closer to you, putting the earpiece where it belongs in the process. "Apparently with how much you chatted about me, the staff started thinking we were about to get married."
You nudge him away from you, rolling your eyes. Asking him to move in is something you might believe, but you definitely didn't talk about him enough for them to come to conclusions like that. If anything, his sick head did that. "Didn't you want to get this stupid mark back? If I were you I wouldn't test my patience like this."
A smile spreads on his lips as he watches you pat his shoulder before walking past him to grab your stuff from the couch. "You're the one who told them we're seeing each other," he raises his hands in surrender, keeping his eyes on you—just like he promised Chaewon he would a moment ago. "You should have just told me you were interested in me, I would have rejected you gently."
"Right," you scoff, your back turned to him as you rummage through your bag. You refuse to look at him, knowing your cheeks are red. You did that, didn't you? You told your whole staff you were seeing Joshua and you were planning on seeing him for a while. Just what did you get yourself into? The hole you dug is much deeper than you realized.
Joshua joins your side as if he couldn't read you at all, not noticing the fact you want to be anywhere but with him right now. Clearing your throat, you push your bag into his hands and walk out first, deciding not to stop even when you hear him mumble something to himself. "Let's go! We need to figure out how to get rid of this thing as soon as possible."
"Yes, ma'am," he chuckles. When then hell did he get to your side again? Are his powers working despite him not holding your hand? You look up at him, wanting to figure it out. Not superpowers, you realize. Just a pair of long legs.
"What's the plan?"
"Just follow my lead."
"I don't like the sound of that," you tell him honestly.
He shrugs in response, "You don't exactly have a choice here."
"Great," you mumble, letting your eyes drop to the floor again. This is just going to be great.
Joshua drives you to your apartment before anything else upon your request. He doesn't seem too happy with having to prolong this, but after you argued with him about not letting him use your powers again if he doesn't drop you off at home so you can shower, he was quick to give in.
Which is why he is now standing in the middle of your apartment, his eyes wandering over every piece of furniture you own. When you first met him, you didn't peg him for a curious cat. "I'll be right back. Don't break anything in the meantime, please."
"Sure," he brushes you off, sitting at your dining table. He takes off his earpiece again and rests it in front of him. To his surprise, Chaewon hasn't directly contacted him through it so far, but if he can avoid it happening, then he will. You're right under is nose, he doesn't need to receive any commands right now.
He can hear the shower through the closed door, listening to the soft sound of the water running as he waits. Maybe he should use this time to think through what even it is he wants to try today. Because truth is, he doesn't have a plan.
He spent hours searching through all the books in his home library, as well as letting Mingyu—his right hand—look through them for the first time. Still, they came up empty. Not even his demon guide (as Mingyu likes to call it) had anything about powers suddenly transferring, and it's been driving him insane. The only thing Mingyu managed to come up with before Joshua got a call from you that you need for him to be your bodyguard was to recreate what happened that night. He has no idea what he's going to do if that doesn't work, though.
The sound of the water stops, but he doesn't pay it any attention, too busy going through everything he learned while studying the books with Mingyu. Your voice almost doesn't reach him either. It's only when you call out to him for the third time that he snaps out of it and raises his head to meet the still closed bathroom door. "Yes?"
"Could you search through the drawers in the living room? I threw my towel into wash last night and need a new one."
He gets up with a sigh but doesn't complain. "Why don't you have your towels in the bathroom?"
"I wasn't the one who moved in my stuff but the company!" You explain. "I forgot about it because of the hurry I was in, trying to get under the water as soon as possible. They should be under the TV, though!"
Joshua shakes his head at you briefly before crouching down in front of the TV, opening one drawer after another until finally finding the one that stores your towels. He takes the first one he sees, spreading it in his arms to see if it's a small or standard sized one. "Do you want a small or a big one?"
"Big one, please!" Silence comes after your response, and it makes you frown. Still behind the shower curtains, you wonder what he's doing. Do you have that many drawers in the living room? "Are you thinking about something inappropriate?" Your frown disappears at the realization. You should have not asked him for anything.
The door cracks open and you step forward, hiding your naked body with the curtain as your head peeks out from the side. "I wasn't until you suggested that," he claims, extending his hand to you so you can take the towel from him.
You roll your eyes at him, snatching it away and disappearing behind the curtain again to dry yourself off. "You know you can leave now, right?"
"Can't, I'm in the middle of inappropriate thoughts."
With your towel carefully wrapped around your body, you push the curtain to the side, meeting his eyes with the deadliest stare you could manage. It's then that he finally cracks into a laugh, shaking his head at your reaction. "You think you're so funny."
"I am funny," he nods, the grin on his lips huge. "You should have seen yourself."
"Ha ha ha, as you can see I'm laughing really hard."
"For your information, I don't have inappropriate thoughts," he says, still finding your reaction funny. You make it seem like all he needs isn't to hold your hand in order to break all the bones in your body if he'd want to. Not that he would. While your deadly gazes don't threaten him, the idea of you taking his powers forever does. "I have no interest in those."
"Right, because you're God almighty and you're better than us humans," you roll your eyes. "How could I forget?" You step out of the shower, holding your towel tightly around yourself. Joshua doesn't turn to leave as he should, he doesn't even take a step back, forcing the two of you much closer than you'd like.
You look up to meet his eyes, only to find your face inches away from yours. You swallow all the words building up in your throat, quick to take a step back yourself when he won't do it. His eyes dip down to you, his gaze indifferent as he takes the sight of you in just a towel in. At least until you step away and the proximity you put the two of you in disappears. In that moment, when you avert your eyes from him, there is a tiny spark in his eyes. One he'd rather not think too hard about.
Clearing his throat, he finally turns his back to you, telling you to hurry as he rushed out of the room and back to the seat he claimed before.
Relief washes over you as soon as the door shuts behind him again. What was that? You don't know, and you don't think you want to. Joshua never made sense to you, so why should you start understanding him now?
You shake your head as you gaze at the door, knowing he is behind it somewhere in your apartment.
You've got one of your dresses on when you meet him again in the kitchen, leaning on the chair opposite him to get his attention. Joshua's eyes snap up to you, his eyes scanning your figure before he decides to stand up again. "You okay with that dress getting ruined?"
You arch an eyebrow at that. "You're planning on ruining my dress?"
He shrugs, "I can't promise you it won't get ruined."
You narrow your eyes, debating if you should go change or not. You have better pieces in your closet, but there are also definitely worse ones that you wouldn't mind at all ruining. He seems to see right through you, shaking his head as he reaches to wrap his hand around your wrist, changing your clothes for you by a simple finger snap. "I'll give you your dress back when we're done. Come on, we need to get to your old house."
You follow him out of your apartment while staring down at your new clothes. He managed to fit exactly into your style while also giving you a more practical options, something you can move freely around without showcasing him the whole world. Black fitted dress pants and a pastel blue blouse hugs your skin, and you have to force back a smile as you think about how good you look.
You didn't think about how his powers could be used before. Now, though, there is a whole new universe full of ways you could benefit from him with. And while you don't want to use him, it would be great if someone could help you rearrange your apartment in the way you like best instead of how you staff deemed appropriate.
Sitting in Joshua's car now almost feels like sitting in your own. You hate to admit it, but it's starting to grow on you. You swore to yourself you would never buy this brand and that you wouldn't think about how good it is, but it's hard when the seats are so comfortable.
But if you are honest, it's not the seats you like about the car the most. It's the fact it comes with a driver, and you can just lay comfortable in the passenger seat while Joshua takes care of the rest.
Still, there must be something special about the Hongqi. After all, it doesn't feel this good when it's Chaewon driving you around town.
As soon as Joshua parks his car in front of your last house, you mourn the place. It truly was your favorite of all the places you lived in until now. You're not sure why, what made it so special, but you always looked forward to coming back home after a long day at the company. You enjoyed just relaxing in your living room and watching movies on the TV. You loved being out in your garden and watching the stars once night came. You loved it all.
Joshua hesitates, not opening the door or turning the engine off as he watches you stare at the house. Your expressions holds a lot of emotions, but the strongest one, the one he doesn't think you even realize are feeling, is fear. He reaches over you to grab your hand again, forcing you to meet his eyes again. "Let's go, hm?" He nods towards the house and you watch as the Christmas lights outside you set up in the winter and never took down again turn on. The house is now lined up with colors, and even though you can't explain it, it does feel like a weight falls from your shoulders.
The house is practically empty, most of your stuff moved out and in your new apartment. Some things still stayed in place, though. The TV still hangs on the wall, your old couch is still in the room, and the vase you knocked over that night is still shattered on the floor. You don't blame them for not bothering to clean it up. They probably didn't think anyone would move in so soon after.
"So what are we doing here?" You turn to face him.
"We are going to retrace our steps," he explains, repeating the same words Mingyu told him. Who knows, maybe it will work out. "If you're okay with that?"
You avert your eyes, laughing it off. "Shouldn't I be the one asking you that? It's not me who got stabbed that night."
"But it is you who would have died if I didn't show up."
You close your eyes, putting on the best smile you can as you nudge him forward, telling him to go stand in the living room. He listens, but his steps are wary either way.
"I came in through the front door," you say, putting yourself back into the night. "I walked in, feeling like something wasn't right. I called out to my brother, thinking it was him pulling a prank on me or something. It wouldn't be the first time, and I didn't think there would be… well," you clear your throat again, walking from the front door to the living room just like you did that night.
"I walk in, can't see anything. I knock over the vase," you point at the broken thing on the floor. "When I see him I start backing away." You do just that, and Joshua takes on the role of the intruder, following you into the kitchen. Being in here again, you can admit that you were scared. You were terrified that night, and recreating the night has sent a shiver down your spine. But as you back into the kitchen and Joshua follows after you, you don't feel scared anymore.
The feeling is replaced by an entirely new one, your breath catching for a different reason when your back hits the kitchen counter and Joshua doesn't stop in his track. "You come in then," you whisper, your voice quieter than before for some reason. "You come save me."
He nods, only stopping once he is a few inches away from you. "You stand right here while he stands over there," you point to a place behind him, swallowing when you meet his eyes again. "How did you get into my house?"
"I teleported right to you," he explains, tilting his head slightly as he finds his eyes gazing into yours. "I always find my way to a desperate soul." He doesn't take his eyes off yours as he brings his hand to your face, tugging a few lost hair strands behind your ear. You lean into his touch on instinct, his thumb gently stroking your cheek.
But the moment is over just as quickly as it started, Joshua clearing his throat and taking a respectful step back. "How did he get in?" He wonders, averting his eyes from you.
You clear your throat as well, forcing your eyes off him. Stupid girl. You can practically hear your mother's voice in your ears. Just like every time you chose a guy for yourself on your own, you can hear the speech she'd give you had she seen the two of you just now. Naive, easy, daughter of hers she thought she raised better. Because how dare you ache for a man that she didn't hand pick for you? How dare you wish Joshua's hand was still on you? How dare you hope he'd touch you in different places as well?
"I'm not sure," you admit, focusing on what the two of you are doing again. "The front door was locked just like I left it when I came back."
"The garden then?" He suggests but you're quick to shake your head.
"He would have needed to climb over the fence or something, and unless he had another person to help him with that, he wouldn't be able to."
"What if he did?" Joshua thinks out loud.
"What?"
"What if he did have another person with? When I picked you up at the JYP building, there was a guy heading for your car. He was taller than the one that stabbed me."
Your eyes widen as you realize what he's implying. Is it possible those two are connected? Was there anyone else in the house that night? Is there still anyone? Panic overtakes your body again as your thoughts spiral, going over the night again and again. Broken vase, the kitchen, you running into the garden. Joshua bleeding on the ground.
Joshua.
His hand is squeezing your shoulder as your own thoughts eat you alive, forcing you back to reality. Your eyes lock with his, needing to see that he is okay. Needing to know that he didn't die that night.
"Let's go out." You nod, letting him take your hand in his as he leads you to your old garden. It's only once he lets go of you again that you realize he wasn't holding your right hand but the left one for the first time.
You press your back against the fence, similarly to how you did that night. Joshua asks for your right hand, staying far enough not to cross a line like the two of you did in the kitchen, but close enough to reach you. As soon as he wraps his fingers around the cross mark on your wrist, he snaps his fingers in the air, making a knife appear in his empty hand. Your eyes widen at the sight, questioning what he's doing.
"Stab me."
To say you are shocked is an understatement. "What? No," you shake your head harshly, pulling your hand away from him and hiding it behind your back.
"I'd much rather have you stab me than do it myself, so please," he offers the knife to you, making your eyes flicker all over him. He is completely serious, isn't he? "Don't make me beg."
"Joshua, I'm not stabbing you," you refuse, wishing you weren't already pressed up against the fence and could put more distance between you. "This isn't— It's not going to help us anyhow," you keep shaking your head, not sure if it's the memory of that night or the idea of being the one to stab him that makes your panic worse.
"I'll heal myself after," he assures you, a heavy sigh leaving his lips when he sees what it does to you.
Closing his eyes for a second, he debates all his options. He could give up, or he could just do it himself and see what happens. But for some reason, he doesn't want to leave you in your feelings when it's clear as day you're spiraling inside. He crosses the space between you, cupping your cheek and making you look at him. He doesn't say anything, just lets you find comfort in his eyes.
It feels like time slows down the moment you're gazing into his eyes and he is holding you as if you're something incredibly precious. You wish you were. You wish you would be so precious to him he would just keep holding you like this and the two of you would never have to go back into the real world.
"Shua," you breathe out softly.
He nods, "I'm right here. I got you."
Everything is okay, you remind yourself. He isn't dying, no one is dying. You're all safe. Your brother, Chaewon, Joshua—they're all okay. Nothing is happening to the people around you.
Except everything is happening.
One moment, you're relaxed in his hold again, thinking about how everything is good, and then the next, your panic is at it's peak again. Your fingers shake as they hover beside his torso, your eyes glued to the place where the knife he is holding disappears in his flesh. "Joshua!"
He laughs weakly, his brows furrowing. Still, even through all the pain, he doesn't let go of you, only mere inches away from you and his eyes on yours. "It's okay," he assures you, his thumb moving in soothing circles on your cheek. "I'll be— okay."
You shake your head, your eyes flickering from the red staining his suit and his eyes. "You're—" you quickly force your right hand to his, urging him to wrap his fingers around it. "Here. Use it. Heal yourself."
A loud groan escapes his lips as he pulls the knife out again, averting his eyes from you for the first time to look at the wound. Nothing is happening. Nothing is fucking happening. "Shit," he grumbles, watching the stain grow with each second he isn't doing anything to stop the bleeding.
"I told you not to!" You yell, fighting the urge to push him away and complain about how stupid he's being. But you can't, not right now at least.
His fingers finally wrap around your wrist, a sign he's given in. The red that pooled at his stomach just a second ago slowly disappears, his clothes looking as brand new as they did when he came to meet you in the practice room. He changes your dress pants and blouse back for your dress, and it's only then that you realize it probably got stained as well. With how close the two of you are, it would only be natural.
"You're such an idiot!" You huff, your free palm pushing against his shoulder. He doesn't step back, though. Instead, he simply catches your hand in his, pining both of them behind your back. It somehow brings you even closer, your head tilted back as you gaze up at him. "I hate you."
"I'm okay," he tells you, completely ignoring your previous statement. "Everything is okay. There won't even be a scar after today. My powers are still in your body, but I'm okay."
You swallow a lump in your throat, slowly nodding. "You're okay," you repeat.
"Let's get you home." His grip on your hands loosens as he takes a step back, not waiting for you to yell at him again or ask what it even was that he wanted to accomplish with that. He leaves you standing against the fence, wondering what on Earth is happening with you and him.
Your eyes drop to the knife at your feet, still covered in blood. You don't have the heart to pick it up and clean it, taking a mental note to make Joshua come back for it later. You force your feet to start moving again, walking back to the house and then out to get to Joshua's car.
Both of you are silent as you take a seat and he drives off. You don't even bother turning the radio on, simply leaning your head on the window and looking out. It's night again, but for some reason, the sky isn't as calming as it once was.
"I lost my best friend," you offer into the quiet. You can't look at him to see if he's listening, though. You keep your eyes on the road, holding your head in your hand. "She got involved in my mess and ended up getting hurt."
"What happened?" Joshua asks, glancing at you as he drives.
"At first it was my flight tickets that got leaked. We had a lot of weird 'fans' on board when we took a trip to Japan together. Some of them followed us around and even got a room in the same hotel we were staying at." The memory flashes in your mind, the nights she spent wondering if you shouldn't find a different place to stay at, and all the times you told her it would be okay.
"It crossed all the lines on our last night there. A guy broke into our hotel room, wanting to get a picture of me sleeping or whatever." You feel as small as you did that night when you were crying to the police officers about what exactly happened. You swore to yourself then that you would never let anything like that happen again, only to end up in an awfully similar situation with Joshua now. "She was never a heavy sleeper, so the moment he stumbled in the hall, she woke up. She interrupted him, ruined his little plan."
"And he wasn't happy with that," Joshua finishes for you.
You nod. "There was this key bowl on the drawer in the hall. He used it to knock her out. By the time I got out of bed to see what on Earth was happening, she was on the floor, unconscious."
"It's not your fault."
"It is," you argue. "Had it not been for me, nothing would have happened. She spent the next week in the hospital and her boyfriend refused to let me see her. I spoke to her parents after. They assured me she would be okay and that they are sure she'd contact me as soon as she's out but…"
This time, Joshua doesn't interrupt, doesn't take a guess on what could have happened. "When she got out of the hospital, he ran her over with his car. I never got to talk to her after all."
Shit. It takes everything in him not to take you in his arms at the moment. It's the human part of him, the one that's been growing every moment he spends with you. It's loud in his ears, yelling at him to help you. To hold you and promise you everything will be okay. Tell you that now that he's here, you have nothing to worry about. But that wouldn't be fair of him, would it? After all, it's him who made you feel anxious in the first place. Him who you had to watch stab himself, worried you were going to lose another person.
His grip on the steering wheel tightens as he takes the next right, wanting to be out of this car as soon as he possibly can. "He was arrested only two blocks away, and when asked what lead him to it, he claimed that he couldn't stand her walking around freely like that when she stopped him from being with the love of his life." The words rot on your lips the same way they did when you first found out. No matter how many times you say it, how many times you think about what happened, it doesn't get any better.
"What was her name?" Joshua asks instead of apologizing like everyone else you've told this story before did. It's the reason you finally take your eyes off the road and decide to face him again.
"Jia. She was my biggest supporter, and the only real love I got to know."
"Tell me about her."
And so you do. You tell him about how the two of you met in high school. You tell him about all the classes you used to take together and how she always dreamed big. You tell him about the precious memories you shared with her, and the times she stood by you when you most needed her. And when you walk to your apartment, you tell him about just how much you used to hate yourself for everything she had to go through because of you, and how much it hurts to know you don't hate yourself as much now that time passed.
"You shouldn't be blaming yourself for something you aren't responsible for," he says, leaning against the doorframe of your bedroom. "It was not you who attacked her that night and it was not you who ran her over. It was that man's fault. What was his name?"
"I don't know," you shake your head, your back turned to him as you take your pajama from your closet, slowly getting ready for bed.
"We both know you do."
"Park Jiwoo. He was arrested in the past for stalking already, so they assured me he wouldn't get to walk away just like that for the second time."
Joshua hums, repeating the name in his head. "Don't do anything stupid," you warn him, reading his mind perfectly.
"I could offer him a deal. Take his soul to hell."
"Do you know what he'd want in exchange? What he desires?" Joshua shrugs and so you continue. "Hunting people. Wrecking them. I've seen more guys like him than I'd like to. He's the same as Minjae. He'd want for you to set him free so he could pick a new prey."
"I could arrange for him to die as soon as he steps out of his cell."
You shake your head at him. "Thank you for the offer, but I'd rather you don't."
"Whatever the boss wants," he complies.
"Don't call me your boss." You finally set your pajamas on the bed, turning to face him again. He's incredible beautiful as he leans against the doorframe, his hands tugged in his pockets and his suit jacket unbuttoned. His hair is a mess from the wind outside, but he doesn't seem to mind. You don't mind either.
"You are kind of my boss since I'm working for you, don't you think?" You shake your head no and he raises a teasing eyebrow. "No?"
You slowly cross the space between you, stopping only when you're right in front of him. Pretending to fix his tie, you allow yourself to gaze into his eyes for a moment. Then, as if it were the most natural thing you've ever done, you let your palm wander up, feeling his chest and then shoulder under your fingers. He doesn't say anything to stop you, only watches you in amusement. "You're not working for me now." A small smile spreads on your lips as you take his earpiece off his ear, letting it rest on his shoulder instead. You take a step back, proud of yourself. "You're not on the clock now. You're not my bodyguard but just Joshua, the demon."
"Joshua, the demon," he repeats, the words sounding like your favorite song when he says them.
"Yes," you nod, stepping back again innocently. "Isn't that who you are?"
"I'm many people," he shrugs, his eyes following your every movement as you walk around the room. "Joshua Hong the CEO of Hong F&B, Joshua Hong the movie director, Joshua Hong the bodyguard."
You chuckle, "that one might be my favorite."
"You're not going to ask me about the director position?"
"You probably did that fifty years ago or something, didn't you?"
"Sixty two actually, thank you so much for asking," he answers, the biggest grin you've seen so far decorating his face. And while you didn't think it was even possible, it makes him so much more beautiful.
You take your pajama in your hands again, ready to head for the bathroom. "Good night, Joshua."
He nods, his smile still attached as he wishes you good night as well. "I'll be here at ten tomorrow to drive you to work. Be ready on time."
"Yes, sir," you giggle, nudging him out of your apartment on your way to the bathroom. "I'll call you if anything," you promise when he still hovers at the door. It's only then that he moves his feet again, heading down the hall to get to his own place.
A part of you wonders if he was serious when he said he would rent out an apartment in the building to be closer to you. As your bodyguard, it would only be welcomed for him to do so. As Joshua, the demon, it would only raise the spark of hope growing in the back of your head every time you find yourself hanging out with him.
"I can't possibly lead the entire company for you," Mingyu argues, finding Joshua's request ridiculous. "It's your company! What will your employees think when all of a sudden I'm the one in meetings, making decisions for everyone."
"You've already been to thousands of meetings in my place," Joshua comments, flipping through his demon manual—as much as he doesn't like the name, he must admit it has a catch—for the hundredth time. He dropped you off at your company so you could practice two hours ago, and he spent the entire time with Mingyu in the office, trying to figure out a way to get his powers back. Again.
And once again, he has nothing.
"It's not the same! You need to make an appearance from time to time too at least. You can't just take off and become a bodyguard on a whim."
"Do I need to remind you how important it is to keep her safe?" He finally looks up from the book, meeting his friend's eyes.
Mingyu doesn't miss a beat before his question, "Because of your mark or because you're falling for her?"
"I am not falling for anyone."
"Right," Mingyu scoffs. "Keep telling yourself that. Maybe it'll go away."
Joshua doesn't respond again, lowering his eyes instead and flipping through the pages as if he didn't read them all already, hoping that by some miracle, something new that would solve his problem would show up. But no. All that stares back at him is the warning of spontaneous combustion if he doesn't make enough deals in time. Every time he reads those words, he finds another reason why he should find a solution as soon as possible. He needs his powers. And he needs them now.
Mingyu sighs. jumping up on the table, his hands braced on each of his side as he watches his boss and long term friend. His eyes are filled with worry as he speaks once more, "What are you going to do if you can't get them back?"
That is a scenario Joshua doesn't want to think about. There isn't a world in which he doesn't have them. He can't walk the streets as a mere human being. He just can't. It's been so long since he last did, he doesn't even remember it. To him, the only life he's ever known is the one he lived as a demon.
Your name rings in his ears, and it takes him a moment to realize it's not his own inner voice but Chaewon, speaking to him through the earpiece he forgot to take off when he came into his office. "She needs an escort in ten minutes." Joshua would love to answer, tell her he is busy and can't, but he bites the words back before they can leave his lips. This is exactly what he agreed to. He needs to be by your side at all times, no matter how suffocating it feels to be beside you, knowing his powers are now yours.
"I gotta go," Joshua states simply, getting up from his seat.
Mingyu's eyes follow him, a knowing look on his face. "To meet your lover?"
"Not my lover," he rolls his eyes, but the truth is, the thought has him smiling deep down. He's quick to shake it off, though. He refuses to show Mingyu that he might not be far from the truth.
You're already waiting in the lobby when Joshua arrives. He steps out of the car, leaning on the hood as he watches you through the glass door, his arms crossed. You notice him immediately, ending your conversation with who he assumes to be another idol and waving bye to Chaewon, who's been waiting with you. She says something to you briefly but you're too busy making your way out to meet him to pay her enough attention.
"I've been told you need a ride," Joshua says instead of a greeting and you have to roll your eyes at how cheesy he sounds.
"If it wasn't for the fact you have signed a contract to be my lord and savior I wouldn't have asked."
He ignores the comment and waits for you to get in the passenger seat, climbing back in right after. "Where are we even going? I thought you said you'd stay practicing until late."
"My mom called and freaked out that I need to meet her immediately. Sorry in advance for whatever is waiting for us there."
"So you don't just need a driver," he hums. "I am here as your bodyguard after all."
"You're here as my guardian demon," you correct, clicking through his navigation and setting it to your parents' house. "So you can do your magic if she is about to kill me. Or if she sets me up on another date."
"So she is the reason you were interrupting my alone time that day!"
You turn your head away from him, suddenly embarrassed. "I'm sorry about that. I didn't… You should have told me you weren't waiting for your date, though!"
Joshua scoffs at your sudden outburst, only glancing at you briefly before locking his eyes with the road again. "I feel like I said it plenty."
"No, you didn't!" You argue, turning your head to look at him so quickly you almost get a whiplash. As much as you'd love to sound mad, there is a smile on your face and your tone is laced with laughter. "You were all like "I want to enjoy a good time with my company but you don't interest me."" You mimic his voice—not even trying to sound close to how he speaks— before giving him a deadpan look.
"Exactly! I just wanted to eat my cake and enjoy my day. But someone," he turns to look at you, his brows arched in a teasing manner "Just had to crash my fun."
You cross your arms over your chest, "I hope you're talking about that group of men that interrupted us and not your beautiful boss."
"I thought you said you are not my boss last night?" A smile spreads on his lips as he focuses back on the road. He realizes exactly what Mingyu would have said if he'd seen him, but he doesn't want to think about it. Not right now at least. Because truth is, the memory of last night— leaning on your bedroom door and talking—puts a smile on his face.
"Oh? You want to be just Joshua, the demon, again?" You tilt your head.
It takes everything in him not to look at you again. A part of him is sure that if he did, the car would really crash.
"Isn't that what I always am when we are alone?" He turns the question right back to you. "Joshua, the demon."
"Not always," you shake your head, your smile falling just slightly. "Sometimes, you're just Joshua to me."
Joshua doesn't answer you but you can see the flash in his eyes. It's so brief, so small, you almost think you made it up. But you're sure. Whatever it is that is going on in his head at the moment, your words seem to have an impact on him.
After a moment of silence, you decide to change the topic, clearing your throat awkwardly. "The men that interrupted us that night, who were they?"
"A gang," Joshua explains simply.
You blink at him confusedly, "A gang?"
"I'm not completely sure," he admits. "But I think they were mad about a deal. A contract came to an end earlier that day, which is why I was at the restaurant in the first place. I was celebrating."
"You were celebrating the end of a deal?"
"A soul caught by me is a soul added to my life."
You frown, scanning him for a second. "What do you mean?"
He hesitates, clearly debating how close he wants to let you to get. It's something only Mingyu is aware of—not even because Joshua would tell him himself but because he snooped around his office once and read through the demon manual. Which then led to him naming it the demon manual—and he never thought he'd be telling anyone else. "If a deal isn't made after a while, a demon will lead to spontaneous combustion," he repeats what he learned in his little manual.
"Spontaneous combustion?" You repeat after him, more surprised than confused on what he means. And if you're honest—scared.
Joshua nods. "I don't know what the time frame is, which is why I've been trying to make as many deals as possible. All I know is that I don't want to burn down."
"We should get you a new deal after this," you blurt out quickly. Joshua glances at you, his brow arched. "I mean," you hesitate. "I wouldn't want you to burn down while I still have this mark on my wrist."
"Right," he nods, taking the next left just like his navigation tells him to. "Makes sense."
You nod along, trying to not think about how weird it would be to just wake up one morning, knowing Joshua wasn't going to be a part of your day. It's a weird feeling knowing you've only known him for a few days yet you feel so strongly about not having him around. You don't want to imagine a world in which he is gone.
The realization hits you like a tsunami. Becoming one with the leather seat, you look ahead at the familiar road leading to your childhood home. What a great time to be a mess who just learned she doesn't want to not have Joshua in her life.
Joshua is the first one to get out of the car when he parks in front of your parents' house. You watch him walk around to your side but don't make a move to unfasten your seatbelt or open the door. You're too in your head for that. He is the one to get your door, and it's only when he prompts you to get out that you finally move again. By the look in his eyes as you step out, you know he can tell something is going on. Thankfully, he doesn't ask, simply waiting for you to walk ahead of him.
He registers another car parked beside his, but with the way you don't pay it any attention, he decides to ignore it as well. It's probably your parents', he tells himself. Who else would be in the house when they are already expecting you?
The house looks bigger from the inside. All the rooms are open spaced, with little to no furniture. It looks like no one even lives here. Are you sure you got the right address? Joshua wants to ask, but with the way you walk around as if it were completely normal, he doesn't. He simply follows you like a lost puppy, trying not to let his confusion show.
He feels out of place. He's used to large living spaces, but this just feels wrong. There are no pictures anywhere or a sign of a living being. The first time he sees proof of life is when you lead him through three different rooms into what he assumes is the dining room.
An elderly man sits at the head of the table, a woman on his side. Two more men are at the table with them, talking among themself. None of them seem to pay you any attention until you decide to speak up. "I see we have the whole family present. And you must be…" you start despite having no idea who the man talking with your brother is.
He is quick to get up when his eyes land on you, walking around to table to reach you. "Choi Seungcheol," he introduces himself, extending his hand for you to shake. Your eyes widen just so slightly, your own name slipping past your lips.
"And this young gentleman?" Your mother asks, eyeing Joshua up and down. Her words might seem welcoming, but by the look in her eyes, you can tell she isn't happy you brought someone with you.
"My bodyguard," you smile up at him, a gesture which he returns. "Joshua Hong. you probably heard of Hong F&B?" Her eyes widen instantly and it forces a smile on your face. It's been long since you last felt like a winner with her.
"I've heard a bunch about you," Seungcheol offers him his hand as well, one Joshua simply eyes. The lack of manners you noticed on your first date with him is showing again, but you're starting to realize it's not that he doesn't know how to behave, he just doesn't care enough about Seungcheol to show it. "You're on the clock, I get it," he smiles instead of being offended.
You shake your head at their interaction—if you can even call it that—and lock eyes with the person who called you over. "I thought you had something to discuss with me?"
"We started drafting your prenup."
"You what?" You blink at her, the shock you feel written all over your face. "I'm not getting married to anyone right now as far as I know!"
"You should sit down," Chan speaks up finally, the smile he offers you so forced you almost curse out loud. Whatever is going on right now, it's nothing good.
Hesitant, you slowly take a seat at the table, on the far end, opposite your father. Joshua comes to stand by your side, not sitting down even when you tell him to. "I am not getting married," you repeat, completely serious. Seungcheol clears his throat, sitting beside your brother again, but you don't pay him any attention. Your eyes are on your parents.
"We talked about this many times. It's time. We need someone who can take over our company, and Seungcheol here is the perfect man for the job."
"Absolutely not," you shake your head. "No offense," you glance at the man briefly, "But I'm not getting married for the sake of some company I couldn't care less about. I agreed to your stupid blind dates, never did anything that wouldn't be to your imagination, and this is what I get in return? If you listened to me for even a second, you would know I don't want to be with someone I barely know, marry him on top of that!"
"It's been decided," your mother states as if she didn't hear anything you just said. Typical. "You are to marry Seungcheol next month. He's been so kind to us all for even wanting to marry you, and you're just throwing another one of your tantrums as always."
You scoff. Tantrums? Is that what she thinks this is? A child's cry because she didn't get a new toy? "I'm not having a tantrum," you argue.
"Please," she laughs at you.
It's times like these that you wish your brother was different. Deep down, you know he isn't on their side. You spoke to him about this many times before, but it still hurts to see you are the only one fighting them while he just sits quietly at the table, his head down.
"If I could—" Seungcheol starts but you're quick to interrupt him.
"Please don't."
Still he doesn't listen to you and continues. "—I'm not asking for anything of you here. We'd be married on paper. I don't care whether you spend your days at the company, at home, or singing. You're an idol I heard?"
He doesn't even know anything about you! He doesn't know what you like and don't. He doesn't know you had to move houses because someone broke into your apartment. He doesn't know anything about how you grew up or what your idea of the future is. He barely even knows what you do for work!
There is not an universe in which you marry him.
"I'm sure you're amazing, Seungcheol, but I am not willing to negotiate about my future here. I have to be the one who decides who I marry. Not my parents, and certainly not you."
"Watch the way you speak to your husband," your father is the one speaking this time. It angers you even more.
"He is not my husband!"
"Will be in a month," your mother shrugs, reminding you just how terrible the people you grew up around are.
"We are leaving," you state. "Delete my number. You won't reach it anyway after today." You don't wait for their response, pushing your chair back so hard it screaks against the floor.
You don't look back as you walk out of the room, ignoring your mother's calls after you. You cannot deal with her any longer. You're getting to the car, blocking her number, and never coming back to this house again.
Joshua raises his hand, ready to shut everyone up. Sew their mouths together or take away their ability to speak. Either would work. But he quickly realizes he can't. "The stupid mark," he mutters, dropping his hand back down. "I'd love to say it was nice meeting you, but I don't feel like lying today," he offers everyone a fake smile, turning on his heel.
"Look after her!" Chan calls after him. The last thing before escaping the family is your mother yelling at him to stay in his place, causing him to roll his eyes. What a great family you have.
You're already waiting at the car when he makes it out of the house. He doesn't say anything at first, simply unlocking the door for you so you can climb in. It's clear as day that all the stress falls off your shoulders as you melt into the seat, hidden from the rest of your family.
"I don't want to marry him," you tell him as Joshua climbs into his own seat. He turns to look at you, his eyes flickering from one feature of your face to another. From your left eye to your lips, back up, to your nose, then to the right eye. He takes all of you in, wishing he could take all your troubles and give them to someone else. To someone who actually deserves them.
"Marry me instead."
You laugh at him but it's quiet. "It's a little early for jokes but still, thank you."
"I mean it," he says confidently. "Marry me instead before they can wed you to him."
"You— You're being serious?" You blink at him, trying to make sense of what he's saying. Joshua Hong, the demon, is actually asking you to marry him right now? Did he lose his mind?
"Marry me," he repeats himself, his eyes locked on yours.
"But— I thought— I thought you'd want to go back to your old life once we get you your powers back."
"We can break the marriage off then," he offers a solution, even though for some reason, deep down, he hates the thought of that. He doesn't want to leave you and go back to his old life. He is learning to love the little thing the two of you have going on right now. Even if it means he doesn't have his powers. It should scare him. He should be freaking out and doing everything he can to get his powers and run. But he can't find it in himself to do so.
You scan his face, looking for any sign of him joking around. No matter how hard you try, you don't find anything. "Okay."
The words are out of your mouth before you can rethink them. You don't want to take them back, though. To your surprise, you wouldn't mind marrying if it's with Joshua. You know he's only doing it to have his powers as close as possible and your arrangement will be over as soon as he gets them back, but it's okay with you.
"I'll marry you," you nod, and the smile that appears on his lips when you agree is something you won't forget for a while.
Chaewon's mouth hung so low you wondered how it didn't end up on the floor. It was an expected reaction. If she looked anyhow differently once you told her you are getting married, you would have thought she was an imposter.
At first, it was just confusion. You don't blame her. Honestly, you are confused with yourself as well.
Then her confusion turned into panic, worried how this is going to go with the company and what your mother will do. The chances of both of them ripping your head off the body are higher than you first thought they were.
She asked you a bunch of questions, making sure this is your decision and it is what you want. You just laughed as you repeated to her for what felt like the hundredth time that yes, you do want to marry Joshua. Eventually, she simply sighed, promising you to talk it over with the company and figure it out for you.
"There is nothing that would say you can't get married while working under us, but we still need to figure out how we'll go about this," she explained to you. You nodded, fully aware of the situation you were in. Then, her eyes locked with yours, and a genuine proud smile appeared on her lips. "I'm happy for you."
Which is how you ended up at your apartment again, with Joshua leaning against a wall in your living room, commanding everyone around.
"Are you sure having this many stuff doesn't just make you a hoarder?" You arch a brow, your eyes flickering between him and all the boxes moving in.
"I've been telling him for ages," Joshua's best friend—even though you're sure he'd hate you thinking of him that way—Mingyu chimes in, carrying one of the heavier boxes.
"You've been working for me for two years," Joshua reminds him.
"Like I said, ages."
You laugh at them, glancing at Chaewon beside you as she watches the moving crew in disbelieve. "You know, it's not too late to back out of this."
You shake your head, "No matter how much of a hoarder he is, I still want to marry him."
Your eyes lock with Joshua's as you speak, your cheeks heating up.
"I admire you," Mingyu says and you force your eyes off him. Still, Joshua isn't able to take his off you. "I could not live with him for a day."
"Well then, thank God I'm not marrying you."
"Don't take lord's name in vain!" He calls after him before disappearing in one of the rooms you didn't have a purpose for until now. Looks like from now on, they'll be Joshua's little storage.
"You don't tell me," Joshua shakes his head, pushing himself off the wall and crossing the room to get to you.
"Is that everything you have?" You wonder, swallowing as you look up at him. He stops in front of you and judging by the way Chaewon clears her throat and steps away, she must be uncomfortable with how close the two of you are. Had you been in her position you would have done the same. Watching a couple like this would only make you feel terrible about being single.
But as the girl involved, instead of stepping away, you want to inch even closer to him. But you're quickly reminded you aren't alone as you hear some of the movers chat on the side.
"The rest is staying in my office," he nods, brushing a messy strand of hair behind your ear. His fingers are gentle against your skin. It's hard to remember the two of you aren't actually in love. If anything, this is a strictly a business arrangement.
"I thought it was my office now," Mingyu says, and the annoyance in Joshua's eyes as your moment is interrupted makes you laugh again.
"As far as I know, you were crying to me about how you don't want it," Joshua glances over his shoulder, pining his friend with his gaze. Mingyu raises his hands in surrender, telling the rest of the movers to get out. Seems like he can get a hint when it's thrown his way.
"We should go too," Chaewon says when it's only the three of you again. You offer Joshua an apologetic smile when his eyes find you again, question written all over them.
"I need to get to the studio and record today," you explain. "I should be done by dinner time. We should have something nice together." You're not saying it only because Chaewon is standing in the room but because you genuinely hope to eat with him tonight. You hope he knows that.
"Alright," he nods, a small smile decorating his lips. It doesn't quite reach his eyes but it still feels sincere. He turns around, heading for the door. "Do I need to hang around once I drop the two of you off or can I take a meeting off Mingyu's back?"
The question is directed towards Chaewon but you're the one to answer. "You can go do your things," you nod. "We got it for a few hours. I'll only be at the company, after all. Right, Chae?"
She hesitates for a split second before nodding as well. "Go ahead. I'll contact you if anything happens."
As soon as you and Joshua arrive back home later that night, you hop into the shower. You offered to make dinner while he showers when he was driving you here, but he quickly turned your offer down, reminding you his powers can make you a feast in the span of a second. You didn't have an argument against that.
The hot water feels like heaven against your skin. You needed this. You and Joshua have been apart most of the day, but you somehow ended up thinking about him every single second of it. He hasn't left your head since the moment you parted ways when he lead you to the recording studio. He wished you good luck and smiled at you—an image that managed to get engraved in the back of your mind.
There must be something wrong with you. You haven't felt like this in forever. The last time you genuinely liked a guy was when you were in high school. You didn't have time or urge to repeat the emotional rollercoaster since then. Until you met Joshua.
To say your entire world turned around when you met him is an understatement. As if figuring out demons and angels exist and that there is a heaven or hell waiting for you wasn't a blow strong enough already, he just had to make you fall in love again.
Love.
You dip your head under the water, trying to get yourself back together. To think what you and Joshua have is love is foolish. Have you always been this naive? There is no way in hell this could be anything. He is leaving you the moment he gets his powers back, isn't he?
The water doesn't help your thoughts at all. If anything, it makes them worse.
You remember the day he brought you a towel after you forgot to take one yourself (thank myself, you think). You think about his gaze and how he told you he doesn't do inappropriate thoughts. You haven't seen anything to prove you otherwise but for your own sake, you'd like to think you're not the only one thinking of him that way.
The image of him in this very bathroom is what has you acting to foolishly. You wish he was here against instead of settling in. You wish he'd stand under the running water with you. You wish his bare skin would press against yours and that he would have his eyes all over you again.
You wish you could feel his hands wander all across your skin like your own do at the moment.
You step back from under the water, your back hitting the wall behind you. This is wrong. You know it's wrong. Thinking about Joshua as your hands wander down your body is not something you should be proud of. But you can't help it.
One of your hands squeezes your breast, your thumb rubbing over your nipple. The other hand dips lower, exploring your stomach and thigh. Teasing, but never dropping to the heat between your legs. Your eyes are closed, imagining Joshua is the one roaming your body so much easier this way.
You bite your lower lip, holding back moans. Your skin feels like it's burning. You tease your clit softly, running a middle finger over it. Your body aches for more immediately, the need you feel increasing.
You throw your head back, a soft whine leaving your lips as you think about how badly you want to have him here with you. If he still had his powers and could put that sixth sense of his to use, you're sure it would lead him right to you. You have to be the most desperate person in the world right now.
Unable to hold back any longer, you let your fingers dip between your legs, slowly circling your clit. It feels good. You don't remember when the last time you touched yourself was but it feels like ages. And even when you did, it certainly didn't feel this good.
Your fingers slide lower, pushing past your folds. It's only your middle finger at first, but once you realize that isn't enough, you add another one. You stretch your pussy with your fingers, Joshua's face clear as day in your mind.
Your hand leaves your breast so you can steady yourself, pushing against the bathroom tiles. You spread your legs a little more, breathing through it as you finger yourself. Soft moans leave your lips, mixed with whines filled with need for more. But you can't get more. Your fingers are the only source of pleasure you'll get here.
"Shua," you cry, desperate. It's not like you think he'll hear you. You aren't even sure if you want him to hear you. All you know is that imagining it's him touching you isn't enough anymore. "More."
Despite feeling like you aren't getting enough, you're still completely in the moment, the outside world tuned out. All you can hear are the lewd sounds you make and the wet sound of your pussy as your fingers slide in and out.
You're so absorbed you don't hear the bathroom door opening, or the steps that follow after.
"You know, my powers might be gone but that doesn't mean my hearing abilities are as well."
You gasp as soon as the familiar voice reaches your ears, your eyes shooting open. Fuck. You glance his way but there is a shower curtain between you, hiding the view. Whether it's his view at your bare body or your view at his that's being blocked, you don't know.
Your fingers slip out much to your dislike, your lips shut as you try to pretend nothing happened. But it doesn't work how you wish it would. How could it? There is no coming back or pretending it didn't happen when he just heard you moaning his name. God. You want to run away as far as you possibly can. But the odds of being able to do so without running straight into him are to your disadvantage.
"Are you going to open the curtain or keep hiding in there for the rest of your life?" You can practically hear the smug grin on his face. You hate how attractive the image looks in your head.
"I think I'm good right here," you pipe and the sound of your own voice surprises you.
"You're seriously going to make me stand out here?"
"I'd prefer if you'd just leave entirely," you shake your head.
"It did not sound like it."
"Please leave and let me die in peace," you groan.
There is a soft chuckle on the other side of the curtain, followed by careful footsteps. You can tell he is right in front of you now. Your name slips past his lips, and it's the hottest it ever sounded. Have you just been completely ignorant to the way he speaks before or did something change? Because despite your embarrassment, you swear every word that leaves his mouth is incredibly attractive.
"Will it help if I tell you I'm having some inappropriate thoughts right now and it would be much better if you'd just let me see you?"
"You're having what?" You blink.
Joshua rolls his eyes, "You heard me, wife."
That's all it takes for you to open the curtain and grant him a sight at your bare skin. But his eyes stay on yours, not daring to dip down. "I did hear you," you nod. "So can you please come join me?" Desperation reeks from your tone and he doesn't waste any more time, dropping his shirt over his head. You watch it fall to the floor, immediately locking your eyes with his hands after as he unzips his pants.
He keeps his eyes on you at all times, and it's incredibly hard to focus on anything other than how handsome he looks. His hair is tussled a bit from him taking his shirt off, and his toned abs are staring right at you.
Your hand slides down your body on its own again, rubbing your clit softly as he undresses himself. "Shua," you pout, needing him here already. His hands need to be the ones touching you as soon as possible or you'll go insane soon.
Joshua finally let's his eyes wander down your body as he stands in front of you in just his underwear, the bulge hidden behind the garment obvious.
He thought he was hearing voices again when he heard your voice calling his name from the bathroom. He's been stuck with you on his mind all day, unable to stop thinking about the look in your eyes when you talk to him, the way your cheeks flush whenever he says something even merely flirty, and the way his name sounds on your lips. It felt like just another figment of his imagination.
Until a moan followed from the bathroom.
No matter how hard he tried to convince himself it was his own self conscience and just his body testing his limits, there was no denying it was your real voice he heard.
His feet took him into the bathroom before he could rethink what he was doing and he is so glad they did. Now that he's seen the beauty of your naked body, there's no more denying anything. Mingyu was right all along. He does have feelings. More than he thought was even possible.
He steps into the shower to join you, his smile growing when you frown. "Take it off."
He cocks his head to the side in a teasing manner, "Where did your please go?"
"Joshua."
"Take it off yourself if you don't like it."
You don't need to be told twice, tugging at the piece of garment. You lower yourself as you do, kneeling in front of him. There is a lewd groan that leaves Joshua's lips at the sight. It feels great to know you aren't the only one feeling like this. But truth is, the hard cock that comes into your sight as soon as you drop his boxers to his ankles is a sign enough.
"Come back up," his hand cups your cheek, tilting your head back so you can look at his eyes instead of his cock.
"I quite like it down here," you smile back at him and he shakes his head. You notice the smile he wears, though.
"I want to kiss you," he tells you. Your eyes widen for a split second before you're quickly scrambling back up to get to his lips. A small chuckle leaves his lips as he cradles your neck, pulling you into him. Your chest pushes into his and his cock is hard against your stomach, but it's only the kiss that you can focus on.
His lips are soft, moving with yours in a perfect rhythm. Your hands slide up his torso, feeling his body. You wonder if he doesn't actually go to his own company whenever he says he does and just spends time in the gym instead. It would explain the muscles he has. Hooking your arms around his shoulders, you push yourself up to your tiptoes.
The kiss deepens, your tongues sliding together as he steps forward, pushing you onto the wet wall. A loud moan mixes into the kiss and you're not sure if it's yours or his.
"Thank God I heard you," he mumbles, lowering his mouth to kiss down your neck.
"I thought you were better than us humans and don't have feelings like this?" You giggle softly, tilting your head to the side to give him a better access. The wet kisses he leaves on your skin feel too good for your own good.
"Turns out you make me more human than I thought possible," he whispers, the words tingling against your skin. "I've been having too many feelings lately."
You shiver, pulling him closer. There is no more space between the two of you, but you wouldn't have it any other way. "Yeah?"
"Yeah," he chuckles. Raising his head to look at you, he lets his eyes simply gaze into yours. A smile creeps up your lips when he does, the warm feeling in your chest impossible to ignore. "Show me what you were doing before."
You suck your bottom lip between your teeth, keeping his eyes on him as he takes a step back to watch. Your hand dips to your legs, your thumb gently brushing over your clit, while your other hand cups your breast. "I wanted it to be you," you admit softly.
Joshua's eyes fall to your pussy, his cock twitching at the sight. "You imagined my fingers in you?"
You nod, watching him with a pout as you finger yourself again—much slower than before, hoping he'll step in. Fortunately for you, he'd rather die at the moment than to not have his hands on you.
His hand replaces the one cupping your breast first, pinching your nipple between his fingers and watching as your mouth falls open in a moan. He captures your lips in his right after, slowly guiding his other hand down, feeling your skin beneath his fingertips.
Anticipation builds with each touch, especially when he pulls your fingers out of your pussy without even looking at them. But he doesn't replace them with his like you wish he would. Instead, he pulls away from the kiss, causing a disagreeing whine from you, and brings your fingers up to his mouth. Before you can say anything, he wraps his lips around them, sucking them clean while watching you.
If you've been wet before, you are a fucking waterfall right now. The sight of him sucking your fingers is wild. It makes you feel like an animal, the urge to jump him right here and now getting stronger with each passing second.
"Shua," a gasp escapes your lips and a a grin spreads on his face all over again. "Please."
"Since you ask so nicely," he nods. Finally, finally, he brings his hand to your aching core. His fingers circle your clit in a similar motion yours did, but it feels so much better coming from him. Your hips inch forward, looking for more friction. You can't tell how long you've been in this bathroom for, but it's about time you reach your relief.
You bring his lips to yours again. You feel so hot. His cock twitching against your stomach, his tongue battling with yours, his fingers sinking inside you—is this what heaven feels like? You'd bet good money it's pretty damn close.
It doesn't take him long to bring you to your orgasm, your nails digging into his shoulders as spasm around his fingers and fill the bathrooms with moans of his name. He holds you through it all, kissing every inch of skin he can get to. "That's it, you're doing so good," he praises, letting you ride it out slowly.
You moan at his words, feeling like you could come all over again just because of the way he speaks to you. It must have been too long since you last had sex because the way you're behaving around this man is insane.
When he pulls his fingers out of you, it doesn't surprise you this time as he sucks them clean. You take the moment when he's busy, letting your hand wander down his body, brushing his cock lightly. "Behave," he shakes his head at you but doesn't do anything to stop you as you wrap your fingers around his length.
"Don't tell me what to do," you arch a brow, wanting to gain at least some respect back.
But it's too late, now that he's seen you so desperate for him, you don't think he'll ever wipe that smug smirk off his face. "It seemed like you'd do anything I say just a second ago, wifey." The nickname rolls of his lips with such ease. It's pathetic how it has you whimpering.
"Yeah, just like that," he nods at the sound you make, loving your vocals. It suddenly hits him that they are the same vocals thousands of people love as well and pay to hear live. How did he get so lucky to be here with you again? You squeeze his cock in your hand, making him snap out of his appreciation. "Keep your eyes on me," he orders, tilting your chin up.
Biting your lower lip, you listen to him as you slowly jerk him off. Watching every one of his reactions, you learn what feels good to him. Rubbing a thumb over his tip and collecting some of his precum, you hold back your own moans when he pinches your nipple with his thumb as well.
He can't seem to keep his hands off you despite it being your turn to make him feel good, only having you falling so much more for him. As if your feelings weren't already strong enough, the way he looks at you with so much love and holds onto you like you're his only anchor in the entire world has your head spinning.
Joshua's abs tense as his orgasm builds up, doing his best to focus on your pleasure instead of his own. The only thing that's been holding him back from coming as soon as he laid his hands on you is the reminder of why he is here—to make you feel good.
"Stop it," your name leaves his lips and you blink up at him confusedly, dropping your hand immediately. You suddenly feel a lot more self conscious, worried you're messing everything up. He quickly takes care of your stress, pressing his lips to yours. "I need to be inside you before I come," he whispers an explanation into your lips, wrapping his arms around your thighs.
Gasping, you wrap your legs around his waist and hands around his shoulders as he lifts you up, your back pressed firmly to the shower wall and his cock hanging just a few inches from your pussy. "Shua, please," you cry, your eyes falling down to where he rubs his dick between your folds. He's so close. "I need you."
"Fuck," he curses, slipping himself inside without hesitation. Your mouth falls open at the stretch instantly, your eyes widening. "Relax for me, darling. I'm going to need to last at least a few seconds," he groans.
Your head falls to his shoulder, "You feel so good."
Joshua closes his eyes as your words reach his ears, doing his best not to come on the spot. the way your walls wrap around his bare length is the best feeling he's ever experienced, and he's beginning to wonder just how much he missed out on in his life by never getting involved with humans like this. Even though, the truth is, he wouldn't want to do this with anyone else.
If it's not you, then what's the point?
Joshua grunts as he slowly thrusts into you, his hands moving from your thighs to your ass. Your flesh fits perfectly in his hands. It feels like you were made for him. Your perfect boobs bouncing in his face, your perfect pussy clenching around his length, your perfect ass sitting in his hands, and your perfect mouth making those perfect sounds. Not only are you absolutely stunning, but in his head, you are also all his.
And that's more than he ever hoped for.
The idea of God making you just for him has his hips moving faster. Your soul being a part of his, your body made to mold with his into one, the stars aligning together at the day you were born just so he could be with you one day—it all does things to him.
"You're so gorgeous," he groans, his eyes locked on yours through all this. "Taking me so goddamn well."
"You shouldn't… take God's name light," you gasp between thrusts, your eyes rolling back.
He chuckles, dropping his eyes to where your bodies connect. "Yeah, let's not bring him into this. This is just between you and me."
"God, yes," you gasp as he hits your sweet spot.
"What did I just say?"
You want to laugh, you really do. But the pleasure is too strong, the way his cock pushes in and out of you the only thing on your mind. Thankfully, Joshua doesn't seem to be doing much better, twitching inside you as he nears his release.
"More," you whine, rolling your hips forward. "Don't come yet."
"Fucking hell," he groans, the sound so loud and strained you can tell exactly how much he wants to do the exact opposite.
He captures your lips in his, getting a better grip on you with his right hand so he can use the left to cup your cheek and hold you. You lean into his touch instantly, allowing him to tilt your head however he wants for a better feeling. Your mouths move together in a perfect sync, hungry but tender at the same time.
Your orgasm reaches you faster than you can warn him, and by the pained whine leaving his lips you can tell it takes everything in him not to do the same. But you wanted more, and who is he to refuse that?
"I can't believe I'm going to marry you," you moan, running your fingers through his hair. He has his eyes on you, as if he wanted you to see the way his eyes flash when you say it. "Mr. and Mrs. Hong."
As much as he wanted to last longer and get you to a third orgasm, the picture you just painted in his head, the two of you sharing his last name and doing this every night in the bed as a married couple, causes him to cover your insides white in the split of a second.
You don't mind, though. It feels so good. He feels so good. "Shit, shit—" your head falls to his shoulder, biting onto his skin as an attempt to steady yourself. Your legs shake at the pleasure, his warm release like a drug you're getting addicted to. There is no way you won't do this again. You need every corner of this apartment to be filled with the two of you, whether that means you'll be bend over it, lying flat, or doing your best to stand straight as he pounds into you.
You'll take all three and much more.
Joshua presses you down again, looping his arm around your waist to help you stand, ignoring the itch from where you bit him. "I couldn't—" he tries to excuse, but before he can finish his sentence, you give him another long kiss.
"I loved it," you say, holding back on telling him you love him. It's true. There is no other way you would explain what is between you and Joshua. Even if it were to be only how you view it, it wouldn't change the way you feel.
"Same," he exhales, cupping your face with both hands and pressing his lips to yours, this time with so much love you could cry on the spot.
You and Joshua shower again—together. But even when you tease him by rubbing soap all over your breast or lingering your hand on him for a little too long, he doesn't fuck you again. Not that you'd mind. You're sure you'll be sore in the morning after this anyway. It doesn't stop him from kissing you, though, loving the softness of your lips on his. He helps you clean thoroughly before stepping out of the shower, drying you off and then carrying you into the kitchen.
Much to your begs for him to let you off without a dinner because you just want to climb into bed and sleep, he makes use of his powers and quickly creates food for you. You sit on the kitchen counter, plate in hands and your eyes on him. You giggle a lot with him, and then, when he gets you into the bedroom, you suck him off lazily in the bed.
Sleep comes much easier to the both of you after that, your limbs tangled together and soft whispers of affection leaving your lips.
It's a phone call that stirs you awake. Before you can properly get up and see who is calling you, you catch a familiar pair of hands reaching for the device and decide to close your eyes again since Joshua's got it. He speaks to the person on the other side but you barely listen.
It's been two weeks since he moved here with you and you've gotten so comfortable with him in that time. You spent every day since then together, exploring each other's bodies and slowly falling for one another. You trust him with your entire self, which makes it a lot easier to sleep at night, knowing he's got you no matter what.
He whispers your name as he hangs up the phone, making you hum back in response. "Are you coming with me or do I go alone?"
That makes your eye peek open. "Go where?"
"The police station."
You are definitely not awake enough for this. You blink at him confusedly, questioning why on Earth you would go there. "It was officer Lee that just called you. They have Minjae and who seems to be his accomplice in custody."
"I'm coming with," you state immediately, sitting up faster than ever before upon hearing the name. You've been waiting to hear these news for what feels like ages now.
"Okay," Joshua nods, taking his time to take you in. He offers you a gentle smile. "Get ready and we can go. I'll call Chaewon to tell her we will be late today." His thumb brushes your cheek before he leans down to press his lips to your forehead, "Good morning, darling."
A smile spreads on your lips as well, the little kiss calming you more than anyone else ever could. "Good morning, baby."
Whispers of good mornings and good nights might be on top of the things you love the most about being with Joshua. He is incredibly sweet, and every time his lips touch your skin you have the urge to tell him just how much you love him. He only ever gets sweet when he is around you and occasionally with Chaewon if he's in the right mood, and you can't help but cherish the person he is when he is with you.
He watches you get ready after preparing breakfast for you, not saying a word. Your eyes flicker up to him from time to time, your lips forming a smile bigger than the last one each time. He looks at you with so much love. Who would have guessed the same man you struggled to stay even half an hour with before will be the same one you can't get enough of now?
It feels like you're sitting in your own car when you sit in Joshua's Hongqi. When you were little, both you and your brother had chairs that were 'yours,' seats at the table that you had to occupy every dinner because they were your designated ones. It always only made you want to sit anywhere else to spite your parents. But sitting in the passenger seat of Joshua's car is completely different. You wouldn't trade this for anything else.
"Are you okay?" Joshua's eyes flicker to you briefly.
"Yeah," you nod, letting your eyes drop to your thigh where his hand rests. You mean what you say, especially when you are with him. "I just can't wait for this to be over. I think I'll feel a lot safer when I know he is locked up and unable to get to us."
Us. It escapes your lips before you can think about it. But it's the truth. Deep down, you were always worried more about what would happen to him than to you. The sooner you'll see Minjae get locked up and wrap yourself in Joshua's comfort again, the better.
Your feet move faster than you expected through the police station. Joshua follows right behind you, and even though you noticed the flicker of disappointment in his eyes when you refused to hold his hand after stepping out of the car, you stand by your decision. You can't focus on anything other that the police officers waiting for you. So despite how much you'd love to hold his hand and have his fingers wrapped around yours, you need to take this time to sort out your thoughts and not worry about your hands sweating too much.
Officer Xu is the first one you meet, greeting you right outside the integration room. "We are sorry to call you so suddenly," he offers you an apologetic smile but you simply shake your head. "We wanted the two of you to be the first to know." His eyes drag from you to Joshua beside you, "I guess we were lucky the two of you happened to be together when officer Lee called."
Officer Xu opens the door for the two of you to walk in, but before you can make a move for it, Joshua's voice ringing in your ear stops you. "She's my wife," he informs the officer and you almost choke on nothing but air.
"Are you okay?" Mr. Xu's eyes are wide as he looks down at you, but it's not his voice your mind comprehends. It only registers Joshua's hand on your shoulder, worry written all over him.
You clear your throat. "We are getting married soon," you correct his statement, to which officer Xu nods confusedly.
He walks into the room first, sensing something is off. Thank god he does. Joshua wraps his hand around your arm and stops you from walking into the room. "What was that?" He blinks, trying to get a good look on your expression.
All it tells him though is that you are tired. "I'm not sure. I'm sorry," you shake your head. A heavy sigh leaves your lips as you look down at your feet. Joshua laces his fingers with yours, giving your hand a tight squeeze that makes you raise your eyes again. "I just want this to be over and for us to be back at the apartment."
He leans forward and presses his lips to your forehead. "I know," he nods. "Let's get this done and go home."
Home. You love the sound of that. You melt into his touch, your thoughts suddenly a lot calmer than they were when you first stepped into the building. Joshua seems to have that influence on you. He calms you and brings out the best of you, just like you do with him.
There is a chair prepared for you when you finally walk inside. Both officers look your way, smiles lining their faces when you see holding hands. Chaewon telling you she is filled with joy to know you are happy again is one thing, but seeing other people wear the same smiles she does whenever she sees you and Joshua together is a completely different one. It makes your chest warm.
"Miss," officer Lee reaches his hand out to you in a greeting. You gladly shake it before your eyes drift to the one way mirror behind him, falling on the same guy you saw in your house that night. He seems to catch the change in your eyes because he steps aside to give you a better view. "We need you to confirm the suspect is the same man that attacked you at your house last month."
You know he has no way of telling you or Joshua are on the other side as he can't see through, but when you see the sinister smirk on his face, only having a simple mirror between you doesn't feel like enough. There are two more men beside him, both with their hands tugged in their pockets and heads down. Despite making themself appear little, their builds don't help them much. The one in the middle is tall, messy black strands getting in front of his eyes. The one on the right is the shortest of them all, but he has the biggest build regardless. His arms are easily the size of your thighs, and it makes you swallow. You've never seen the other two men before, but they manage to scare you more than Minjae does.
Joshua notices you tense in place, squeezing your hand. "It is him. The one on the left. He is the one who broke into the house and then stabbed me."
It takes you a second to snap back into reality. When you do, you nod immediately, agreeing with what Joshua said. "It is him."
"Okay," officer Xu nods, motioning for you to sit down on the chair, "Please."
You take a seat, taking a deep breath as Joshua stands behind you with his palms resting on your shoulders. Both officers stand opposite you, blocking your view at the three guys. "Who are the other two?" You blink up at them in question, needing to know in order to feel better.
The two men share a look, clearly debating what to tell you. "Suspects," they settle on eventually. You don't like the answer at all.
"In what case?" It's Joshua asking this time, but he voices exactly what you're thinking.
"This case."
Your breath hitches. "There…There was a guy that followed me in a car," you remember, glancing back at Joshua to see if he is thinking the same. "Is that— Is that one of them?"
Officer Lee clears his throat, his eyes flickering between you and Joshua. "Possibly. I'm sorry but we can't tell you anything else right now. All we can share is that we are glad we caught them before they could hurt anyone else."
"Give me your hand, darling." Joshua's words might sound like a gentle attempt at comforting you to the officers, but you catch onto the venom that laces them. You narrow your eyes at him before hesitantly offering him your left one, only for him to reply with an annoyed glare that confirms your suspicion. Whatever it is that he has in mind, it is nothing good. Definitely not anything the officers would love.
"Wait for when we are home, baby," you smile, trying to be as playful as possible.
"We won't hold you for much longer," officer Xu assures you. "We just need to go over some paperwork with you and then you'll both be free to go again."
You nod, standing up again, appearing as loving instead of distressed as you can. "Did you hear that?" You stand on your tip toes, brushing your lips with Joshua's softly. It's barely a peck, but it certainly is enough to convince the officers there is nothing weird about your interaction. "We can get back to bed soon."
Had it not been for the mood he is in, Joshua might groan at your suggestion. But his head is filled with the image of the three men behind the glass mirror. He's starting to understand why you've been so off on the way here. Now that he's got a good look at them, the only thing on his mind is the urge to wipe those smirks off their faces.
He likes the version of him you bring out. The one where he is so in love his chest physically hurts and he thinks he could die a happy man any day because it would mean he got to spend his last minutes with you. But right now, he is the complete opposite of that. There is only blood behind his eyes, the image of what he could do to all of them so clear, he almost forcefully grabs your hand and just breaks their necks in front of everyone.
But before he can do so, you lace your left hand with his, tugging him out of the room with you. "Shua," you hiss at him. "Stop even thinking about it."
He doesn't listen. "It would be easy for me," he reminds you, his eyes full of determination as he looks down at you. "I could get rid of them in the blink of an eye. You wouldn't even know it was me. Or I could torture them. I could make them suffer for what they put you through—"
"Shua," you interrupt him, this time with more force. "No. You're not going to do anything about this. You are going to sign the papers where it says you are certain that guy stabbed you and almost killed you and call it a day. You'll let the professionals handle this so they can all sit in the cold cell waiting for them."
He wants to argue more. You can tell he does. But you don't let him. You pull him down to kiss him again, this time longer and harsher than before. "I love you, but you can't be doing this."
"You love me?" He asks, wide-eyed.
Crap. You didn't think properly about what you were saying, only focused on calming him down again. You shouldn't have said that. It's too early and you're only going to freak him out. Maybe it'll only anger him more, and what are you supposed to do then? If he decides to just throw hands, you have no way of stopping him before he ends up behind a cell himself.
He says your name, cupping your face in both hands. "Do you love me?" He repeats his question and you nod. "God," he chants, pulling you in for another kiss. The door opens again and you're sure it's the officers walking out as well to lead you to their office like they said they would, but you can't give them the time of the day. Not now. "I love you," he groans back, your eyes widening when you feel his hard cock press against you through the layers of clothing you're both covered in.
It's when the officers clear their throats that you manage to push yourself off him, reminding yourself you aren't in the comfort of your house where you could do anything you'd possibly want. "Not to interrupt—"
"Let's get this over with," Joshua claims, hurrying them forward. "We got somewhere important to be."
His behavior makes you chuckle, the sight of him all giddy and excited again a pleasure to your eyes. A part of you wishes you would have used a more special place to confess your love to him, but this will do as well. Knowing you got him so messed up he just got hard in the middle of the station is a happy memory enough.
Either way, you are sure anywhere with him would have been great.
"We are at the police station," you remind him.
"The parking lot," Joshua corrects, pressing his lips to yours again.
"There are people outside," you argue, but don't make a move to get off his lap.
Once all the papers were signed, you didn't waste any more time and made your way back into Joshua's car. You wanted to get back home as soon as possible, but he was even more impatient than you, pulling you over the consol into his seat. With your knees now on either side of his legs, caging him in, you sit on his lap, kissing him like he deserves.
He ignores your comment, resting his forehead against yours. "I love you." His breath feels tingly against your skin, the smile you wear impossible to hide. You love him so much. You've never felt like this before, and it's making you realize how much you've been missing out on. Both of you were.
You also couldn't be happier that you are both experiencing this for the first time with each other, though.
"Let's get home," you whisper back, grinding your hips forward. "I want to love you in the comfort of our home."
His groan echoes in your ears, only making you so much more needy. It takes everything in you to hold your word and not fuck him right here in his car in the middle of the day. You're not sure how you'd explain that to officer Xu and Lee once someone would complain about you.
"Let's go home," he nods, clearly thinking the same.
He watches you climb back into your seat and fasten yourself in, offering him the pretties grin he's ever seen. He drives off the parking lot, resting his right hand on your thigh as soon as he connects with the road. You lace your fingers with his on top, looking ahead.
Ever since he started driving you around, whether for work or a run to the store you begged him for, he's been enjoying his car more and more. He never really saw the appeal before, used to just using his powers to get around. But without his powers and with you by his side, this has been great as well. He would continue to drive you anywhere you could possibly think of if you'd just let him.
The way you slide his hand up on your thigh is anything but innocent, but now that he is getting further and further from the police station, the questions he knows he needs to ask you are getting louder and louder. He squeezes your thighs, stopping you from pressing his hand against your aching pussy. "How are you feeling?"
"Pretty in love," you smile, not catching on the worries in his eyes.
"About what happened, I mean," he explains, letting his eyes drop to you for a split second.
"Oh," you breathe out. You shift in your seat and clear your throat. "I'm… okay." You watch as he raises an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. "I am, really," you assure him with a tight squeeze to his hand. "It… It was scary, to look at them," you admit, thinking over your next words. "I felt this strong ache in my heart when I looked at them. Without even knowing who the other two guys were, I could tell they weren't good. It was scary but…. it feels good to know they are in the police's care now."
Joshua's thumb provides soft soothing movements on your thigh, helping you feel much better as you speak. "Having you by my side helped a lot, but knowing there are finally going to rest in a cell brings so much needed peace to my soul."
Joshua's lips form a smile. "You are the strongest person I know."
You are quick to shake your head. "There are so many amazing people out there who went through worse than me. All I did was hire a bodyguard who knew what he was doing," you giggle softly as you look at him again.
Smile decorates his lips as well as he looks at you, his eyes carrying the same love yours do. How did you get so lucky again?
"I'm glad I have you," you tell him, slowly averting your eyes to look back at the road. Your eyes go wide, seeing the crash before it even happens. "Shua!" you try to warn him quickly, but he doesn't turn the wheel fast enough. It's too late.
Everything goes by so fast. Joshua's car drives into another one before anyone can do anything. Your ears are buzzing, everything around you spinning until it all stops, and you can't see anything but black.
Joshua's head feels like it's been split apart.
Has this happened before? He feels like it has.
A loud groan leaves his lips, but it's not one he'd like. Forcing his eyes open, he can barely make out his surroundings. Everything is a blur of colors, nothing making sense. Someone is calling out to him. At least he thinks it's meant for him. But he can't make out the words or the intentions behind them.
It takes him two more seconds before the voice gets clearer. "Sir! Sir, can you hear me?!" the voice sounds frantic. It's not one he would recognize, which only confuses him further.
"Yea—" he chokes on his own saliva as he tries to speak, forcing his mouth closed immediately. He hasn't felt this much pain since the day he was stabbed. His brows furrow together as he takes his time catching his breath.
The car door beside him opens—more like falls apart—and he glances the stranger's way. There is a concerned older man on his side, trying to help him out of the car. Joshua shakes his head, pulling his hand away from him. His eyes flicker around, trying to make sense of what's happening.
The car, his eyes widen. He crashed the car. Before he can think about anything else, his eyes snap to your side, needing to know you are okay.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. There is so much red in front of his eyes. His hands struggle to move as he tries to reach you. He needs to get you out. He needs to hold you in his arms and assure himself everything will be okay.
But it's far from okay right now. Your eyes are closed and your head is down. You're lucky the seatbelt pulled you back. The front glass is shattered into pieces that scratched your skin all over, but it doesn't look like any of the shards got too deep into your skin.
"Sir! You need to get out!" The man on his side calls again, trying to unfasten Joshua's seatbelt.
"My wife," he chokes on his own words, the pain he feels when he looks at your motionless body much worse than the one caused by the crash. "You need to help my wife!"
He curses quietly as he reaches over to you, grasping your right hand in his. If he can do something, it's this. He pulls your hand closer, rolling up your sleeve to look at the mark carrying all his powers. "No, no, no, no," he shakes his head in denial, watching the mark fade away with his own eyes. What the fuck is happening?
There used to be a time where he would love to see his mark leave your body and go back to him, but right now, the fact only scares him. It doesn't make any sense. Why now all of a sudden?
His eyes flicker to his own wrist, the black mark slowly appearing on his skin again.
The thought of all the times him and Mingyu tried to figure out the reason why his powers were flickering like this flashes in his mind. None of the memories seem important right now, though. At least until he hears Mingyu's voice. "Try recreating what happened that night." The two of you did that. You went back to the house and he stabbed himself in the same place Minjae did. He stood in the same place and it didn't work.
But of course it didn't work. Him getting hurt all over again couldn't do anything. His powers weren't in his body anymore, so it didn't matter that he was the one with a knife in his flesh. You're the one who had possession of his powers.
He calls out your name, trying his best to wake you up—to get himself out of this nightmare. You don't answer. He holds your hand tightly in both of his, whispers of prayers leaving his lips as he tries to use his powers to save you.
Joshua getting hurt was never going to do anything to help. You were the one who needed to lose her breath in order for his powers to go back.
He would rather never have his powers back than do this. He should have kept his eyes on the road instead of you. There were so many times you've told him to drive carefully in the time you've known him, and he still managed to fuck that up.
"The door doesn't open!" It's a different voice this time and Joshua realizes the guy on his side isn't the only one around.
Scared is not a feeling he does. He can't remember the last time he felt like this. But right now, as he is forced to watch your dying body, fear is the only thing he knows. Nothing is working. His powers are flickering in his hand instead of helping, and the people around aren't able to help either. Is this really the end? Is this how the universe finally takes revenge on him for everything he's done?
In a moment of weakness, when he thinks giving up is the only option he has left, his head throbs in pain. His eyes squeeze shut, his ears buzzing. The outside voices vanish completely. Not only is he going to lose you, but he is also going to lose himself.
But then again, it's better this way. If he can't keep living with you, he'd rather not live at all.
The afterlife looks different than he thought. There are children running around him, playing a game. One of them bumps into him. Joshua is ready to ask if he's okay, but as soon as the child locks eyes with him, he runs away before he can even open his mouth. He blinks confusedly, looking around.
As soon as his eyes land on you, he feels his heart skip a beat. You're standing with your back to him and your clothes are completely different, but he has no doubt it's you he is looking at. No matter what you wear, how much you try to hide, or how much you run away from him, he will always recognize you and find his way back to you.
You're here. You are with him. His feet move faster than he can comprehend, chasing after you. He calls out to you, but you don't answer. You seem mad at him. Is it because he wasn't paying attention to the road? He speeds up to get to you faster, wrapping his fingers around your wrist and pulling you towards him.
A soft gasp leaves your lips as your body crashes with his. "Your highness," you push yourself off him as quickly as you can, your eyes wide as you look up at him. "You can't be doing this here, you know it," you shake your head at him. What? "People will look." He drops his hand from yours hesitantly, letting it fall to his side.
Your name slips past his lips, a pathetic sound he wouldn't take back no matter what. "What happened? Why are you—"
"Your Highness," you sigh. "We both know our love isn't strong enough against society."
It hits him then, as you walk away from him and his feet stay glued in place, a strong pain in his chest making itself known, that this isn't the afterlife. If it were, he would be happy in your arms. His skin would be pressed against yours and you would be smiling at him with that pretty smile of yours. This is the opposite of what it's supposed to look like.
Another strong wave of pain rushes into his head, and he crashes down to the ground. With his head buried in his knees, he bites back a scream. He needs this pain to stop.
A hand wraps around his arm, dragging him away. He doesn't stop it, the pain in his head too strong for him to focus on anything else. Your name leaves his lips in a soft cry but it doesn't do anything to bring you back to him. You left. You decided that he wasn't worth it all after all.
God, may this torture come to an end.
When his eyes open again, he isn't where he was before. He isn't even in the car. He is lying on a hospital bed, his own body too heavy for him to move. There is no one else in the room with him, and it only reminds him of everything that happened. The last time he woke up in here, you were waiting for him. Last time, he got to wake up to your face.
But right now, you are nowhere to be seen. He is all alone again. In the two hundred years he's roomed this world, offering deals to helpless souls, he never felt as alone as he does now. Without you around, it's like someone took away a part of his soul, a piece of his heart.
The door opens and his eyes snap to it, but it's not you he sees. All his hope vanishes instantly. He closes his eyes as Mingyu slowly walks in without saying a word. The sound of a chair scratching against the floor makes it known that Mingyu is sitting down beside him, but he doesn't have enough strength to look at him. If he were to look, he isn't sure he wouldn't break down.
"It's good to see you awake," Mingyu breaks the silence softly. Joshua only hums in response. "I've been worried about you. That manager, what was her name?" He thinks out loud, looking for an answer in his head.
"Chaewon," Joshua supplies.
"Chaewon," Mingyu nods. "She's been worried about you as well."
He doesn't answer. She is the last of his worries right now. His throat feels tight, his chest pulling in and squeezing his heart in the process. It's the first time he is experiencing anxiety, and he absolutely hates it. "What happened with…" The words catch in his mouth, the rest of the sentence dying along with the last bit of strength he had.
"She's getting there," Mingyu assures him, figuring out the rest of his question.
Somehow, the simply three words manage to save his entire world. "Where is she?"
"Her room is down the hall. She was in a more serious condition than you but she pulled through. She isn't awake yet, but doctors think she should be okay soon."
"Take me to her."
Mingyu opens his mouth to argue, clearly not pleased with the command. But before he can say anything, Joshua sighs and reaches for his hand, snapping his fingers effortlessly. He has a destination to go to, but before he teleports himself right to you where he belongs, he heals himself completely to get rid of the lingering pain.
It doesn't take away the anxiety he feels when he sees you on the hospital bed, asleep. This is all his fault.
"Whoa," Mingyu breathes out when he finds himself standing in your room, his eyes flickering from you to Joshua. "You have your powers back?"
Joshua grits his teeth, "Yeah, it only almost took her life." The hate he feels for himself is so strong it fills every word that leaves his mouth. If he could take back time, he would. If he only could change what happened and make sure you never got hurt like this in the first place, it would all be okay.
"It's not your fault," Mingyu rests his palm on Joshua's shoulder but it does nothing to calm him. "The doctors said that the coma is good for her. Her body gets the rest it needs without any stress from the outside world. It helps her heal better."
He hums, unable to take his eyes off your face. "I tried saving her as soon as I realized what happened. My powers…" he closes his eyes at the memory, his voice weak as he speaks. "They weren't working. I think— What if she died for a moment there and that's why? What if I killed her?"
Mingyu blinks, clearly taken aback. What does one say to that? How is he supposed to assure his friend it's not his fault when he can see how much it eats him alive? When he fully believes the burden is all on him? How would he convince someone like that that you aren't going to blame him for what happened?
"There was nothing you could have done that would prevent it. But the doctors did everything they could and she's okay. She's alive," he reminds him. "She's still breathing and I'm sure she is waiting to see you again."
Joshua only hesitates for a brief second before taking a few steps forward, crossing the room to get to you. Pulling forward a chair to rest beside your bed, he takes a seat and reaches for your hand. His eyes drop to his wrist, assuring himself his mark is still there. If his powers don't work again, he isn't sure what he'll do.
The room is quiet with Joshua focused on his powers and Mingyu not wanting to disturb. It's so quiet, Joshua immediately knows you're waking up just by the soft sound of the mattress. It worked. His powers worked. A heavy sigh full of relief escapes him, seeing you waking up again instantly warming his heart.
"The doctors are going to be awed when they find out she's all healed again," Mingyu chuckles a little, watching it all from the entrance.
"Don't tell them," Joshua's head snaps to him. "I'm going to take us home. I don't want them keeping us any longer."
"What's going on?" Your sleepy voice sounds like a song in Joshua's ears. It feels like along with you, a part of him was healed as well.
"I'll leave you two to it then," Mingyu smiles, saying his goodbyes before leaving the room.
Joshua is quick to apologize to you when it's just the two of you, only confusing you further. When the reason he is blaming himself so much finally slips past his lips, realization settles in and you pull him closer. He's big but he still fits into the hospital bed with you when you squeeze so close half of your body is on him. Resting your head on his chest, you drape your arm around him. "Please stop apologizing. We are both okay. We are both safe and alive."
"We are," he nods, drawing small circles on your back with his arm. You're not sure if it's to help you or himself, but you let him. Pressing his lips to the top of your head, he lingers just a second too long, inhaling your scent. "I got my powers back," he whispers.
You almost hit your head against his chin with how fast you look up at him, surprised. Searching for the cross mark on your wrist, you don't find anything. "Oh my god!" Your smile grows. "You have them back!"
He chuckles at your excitement, nodding. "I have them back. But most importantly," his eyes soften as he looks at you, "I have you back."
There isn't an universe in which you would guess that Mingyu and Chaewon would be making out at your wedding.
You had to recheck twice and ask Joshua—who was currently in the middle of arguing with the DJ about his song request—if he was seeing it as well. You watched as confusion took over his expression, clearly as lost as you were. It only took five seconds before you both started laughing.
"Cheers to that," you chuckle, shaking your head.
Joshua smiles as he looks down at you, taking in the sight of you all over again. You, in a beautiful white dress. You, with your eyes staring up at him. You, filled with all the love in the world. You. His wife. Now, finally, on paper. He doesn't think he'll ever get enough on the way you look tonight, all dressed up for him. "Cheers to us."
A smile spreads on your face, but before you can say anything, Joshua sends one more glance towards the DJ and pulls you towards the center. "What are we doing?" You giggle, wrapping your arms around his shoulders without hesitation.
"Dancing," he shrugs, unable to look away from you. His hands rest on your waist as the upbeat song your brother has been absolutely rocking to until now switches to a slow one—your own song. Had it been a different situation, you might cringe at the sound of your own voice echoing through a place like this, but you are too focused on your husband to care right now.
"Hi."
"Hi," you repeat after him, stepping closer and resting your cheek to his chest.
"You look incredible tonight," he whispers into your hair, moving in a slow rhythm with you. "You always do. But today especially."
"Thank you," your smile only grows.
You were never looking forward to getting married. Not when it was your mother who was deciding everything on your behalf. Marriage seemed like a trap, like a way to force you to settle down instead of chasing after your dreams. But with Joshua by your side, it feels like the exact opposite. You would marry him thousand more times if he wanted to.
"You look handsome yourself if I may say," you add, your voice quiet so only you two can hear. Your guests make a circle around you, but you don't pay them any attention. It's just you and Joshua in your little bubble.
As if he could read your thoughts, a little flower bubble actually appears around the two of you, creating a barrier between you and the rest of the wedding party. You pull away just to look at it, your eyes wide. Judging by the gasps full of awe, everyone else finds it just as incredible as you do.
"One might think you are an angel with all the beautiful you do around me," you comment and he instantly rolls his eyes.
"Angels are the opposite of beautiful. For your information, I've seen some of them and they are more ugly and scary."
You laugh at the disgust on his face. "You've just been designed to seduce everyone!" You shove his shoulder weekly.
He laughs with you, a sound so beautiful you can't believe you'll be able to hear it for the rest of your life. "This has always been my face, darling. Nothing to do with my demonic side. And I'm sure you know a lot about that one," a smug smirk decorates his lips as he whispers the words to you, adding more blush to your makeup.
"I don't believe you," you shake your head, hiding your face in his chest again.
A chuckle leaves his lips. "That's okay. Deep down, you know I've been born this blessed."
He's impossible. Annoying, but so addicting. You hate how much his words work on you.
"So were you, thought," he adds, and you find yourself looking up at him again. He sees your questioning eyes and decides to share a bit of himself he wasn't sure how to tell you yet. "I've been having these dreams ever since my powers came back." You listen closely, surprised you haven't heard anything about this until now. It's been months since that happened.
Even thought the decision for you two to get married was made because he wanted to save you from being forced into a marriage with another man, you both agreed to take your time and not rush. You sat down with your mother again and told her you will be marrying Joshua and not anyone she picked out for you, and that she was free to leave the company to him if that was what she wanted to do. Just to make sure nothing would happen behind your back, you made sure to call Seungcheol as well and ask him to meet you for a coffee.
Over the warm drink, you realized he wasn't exactly up to the idea either. Turns out, he has it as hard at home as you do, and even though he didn't want to force you into anything, marriage with you would have been his escape. You apologized to him and explained how Joshua was not only your escape but also the love of your life, and he seemed to understand.
It all allowed you to take your time with planning and create a wedding this perfect.
"It took me a while to realize, but they are actually memories. I'm not even sure if they are mine, though."
"Whose would they be if not yours?"
"Yours."
Your confusion only grows. You tilt your head to the side, letting him spin you around as a part of your little dance. "What do you mean?" You ask as soon as you're in his arms again. This conversation reminds you of the first time he was trying to convince you he was a demon. He doesn't make sense to you, but unlike last time, you don't try to search for a different meaning in his words or argue with him that what he's saying isn't true. You simply listen.
"I think we knew each other in another life. In the previous one. Before I became a demon." Your eyes widen. "You're in all of them. You're mad at me sometimes, you refuse to talk to me and send me away every time I crawl back to you. But there are also times when we are in love. When it's just the two of us alone and I get to hold you in my arms and whisper love notes in your ears," he leans down to you to add to it, his breath tingly against your ear.
"Then, in the most recent ones," his jaw ticks a little and you know whatever he is about to say next isn't something you'll like. "I've been seeing what happened to you when I was gone. It's like I'm watching through someone else' eyes. I know they aren't my own, but I can't whose they are."
"What's happening in those memories?"
"Pain," he settles for a single word that somehow manages to carry it all. With his brows furrowed together and his smile turned down, you can tell the memories aren't nice. "So much pain that lead me to become what I am now when I arrived back at our old kingdom and realized you were gone."
"You became a demon after I died?" You take a step back so you can look at him properly, the little flower bubble around you bursting and creating a beautiful effect. You wish you could see it and fall in love like the rest of your guests, but you cannot look away from him right now. "You—"
If this isn't what soulmates are, you don't think there is such a thing then. To find out you and Joshua have been connected this entire time, long before you even met him, is a confusing but also a warming feeling.
"I had so much anger in me. I… saw your body after… it happened, and all I could see was red. The place went out in flames after that and I think that's when," he makes a point to look down at himself, trying to lighten the mood again, "this became reality."
Your conversation must look super confusion to everyone around, especially as the slow song comes to an end and you're just left standing in the middle of the circle, staring at each other. You'd love to say you don't believe that happened, that for sure you couldn't have been the reason he turned into a demon. That seeing your dead body couldn't have done this and that he didn't set the entire place on fire, but deep down you know to believe what he tells you.
"I think I just fell in love with you even more," you breathe out.
The laugh that leaves his lips is a mix of surprise and awe. You don't blame him because you wear the same feelings in your eyes. "Welcome to my life," he closes the space between you again, his hand finding its way around your waist so naturally it almost looks like it's where it's been all his life. "I fall for you more and more each time I wake up."
Joshua's lips press against yours in a warm, tender, kiss. Your hands instantly wrap back around his shoulders, pulling him as close as you physically can. It's all so easy with him. He makes you believe in so many things you never though you would before—and not only about angels and demons—and always reminds you what life is all about.
Despite enjoying what you had before you met him, you don't ever want to go back to that time. You don't ever want to experience a life without him by your side again.
⋆✶ izzy's tags @beomiracles @adel222 @liaatiny @cherrylovescheol @bamgeutsz @codeinebelle @livelaughloveseventeen @xylatox @cristy-101 @assoulacaratassil @ladytree @nonuverse @fairyprincesslvr21 @cheolcheolieee008 @yvampyr @bramos91 @amisuh @lunaxgyu @livmarauder @evemds @nanilis @eskoupe @ashleytjw @jaja-salute @thegalaxyisunfolding✶⋆
Can u make kdrama matching gifs??
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀made by @chaewovn ♡
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ prt 1 / request ♡ : kdrama matching gifs
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀dont claim + f2u & ♡ + ↻ if use
If I had a nickel for every time the an ancient Korean man who's been cursed with eternal life sacrificed himself for the girl who made them feel human again and slowly turned into ash while softly smiling at her, I'd have 3 nickels.......
Which isn't a lot, BUT I'M GETTING SICK OF THIS EMOTIONAL DEMOLITION AND I NEED THESE PEOPLE TO STOP DOING THIS TO ME MAN ISTG!!
IT WASN'T FUNNY THE FIRST TIME! IT WAS LESS FUNNY THE SECOND TIME! BY THE THIRD TIME I WANTED I WAS ABOUT TO JUMP-
no one is safe😭😭
DO DOHEE + outfits








