#npd resources

[crowthatweeps]

made a venn diagram showcasing the differences and similarities of npd and bpd, please tell me if i got anything wrong :>

got my sources mostly from:

@clusterrune, @hauntedselves, @shitborderlinesdo, and the internet!!

[psychresources]

NPD Resources Masterlist

OTHER IMPORTANT POSTS: What is NPD masterlist | NPD self-diagnosing guide

(This post will grow over time. Check the original post for updates before reblogging!) Last update: 7/28/2026

General

Personality disorder information masterlist

Basic NPD terms

Cluster B terms

Disordered, adequate, and optimal functioning of each personality disorder

People that love their kids cause PDs too

NPD resources doc

Cluster B resources masterlist (link 2)

NPD stigma (1), (2), (3)

"Narcissistic abuse" is emotional abuse

Chosen person vs equal person

Exception person vs equal person

NPD and self-neglect

NPD Online Database

Being in a relationship with someone with NPD

The history of narcissism

How to find non-ableist creators talking about NPD

The positive sides of NPD

Masterlists

NPD resources masterlist (npd-goro-akechi)

NPD resources masterlist (hammersys)

NPD resources masterlist (r/narcissism wiki)

NPD resources masterlist (selimz)

NPD resources masterlist (a-sip-of-milo)

Treatment/management/self-help

A list of things that could be supply

Creating your own supply

Tips, tricks, and advice

CBT for cluster B PDs

Tips for Cluster B anger

Expressing emotions in relationships

Preventing a narc crash

How to avoid a crash

Relationships with NPD 101

Healthy and realistic relationships with NPD

One person's recovery story

How to take accountability

How to make friends who will respect you

How to self reflect

How to get more attention from your friends

How to get supply when none of it feels genuine

How to deal with envy

Coping with shame masterlist

Anger 101

Envy 101

The ULTIMATE Distress management masterlist

Recommended media:

Split Self / Split Object: Understanding and Treating Borderline, Narcissistic, and Schizoid Disorders - Philip Manfield (BOOK)

The Handbook of Narcissism and Narcissistic Personality Disorder - Theoretical Approaches, Empirical Findings, and Treatments (Edited by W. Kieth Campbell and Joshua D. Miller) (BOOK)

Personality disorders in Modern Life: 2nd Edition, by Theodore Millon, Seth Grossman, Carrie Millon, Sarah Meagher, and Rowena Ramnath (BOOK)

Borderline, Narcissistic, and Schizoid Adaptations: The Pursuit of Love, Admiration, and Safety - Elinor Greenberg (BOOK)

Community:

@hauntedselves

@thevampirenarc

@this-is-narc-joy

@npd-confessions

@npd-advice

@narcissisticpdcultureis

@narc-rants

(Let me know if you want to be removed from this list, or if you aren't on the list and want to be added!)

[aethericvampire]

The upsides and positive traits of NPD.

A LOT of stigma and misinformation exists around NPD. Socially harmful behaviour needs treatment, but that's really not unique OR inherent to narcissism. I found almost no articles or areas to research discussing any actual positives so. I WROTE IT MYSELF!! Here's a list.

POTENTIAL POSITIVE ASPECTS TO NPD:

We are generally HIGHLY driven people. Because we gain a more clear/stable self image through setting goals, we tend to be much more willing to put a huge amount of dedication into our work. While of course bullshit or personal struggles can get in our way temporarily, we tend to be completely unwilling to give up or 'settle' when it comes to our dreams and ambitions.

Grandiosity is pretty rare nowadays. It might just be me, but I think people in general are getting a lot more self deprecating and defeatist. Grandiosity in some cases can be hugely important for finding the right opportunities. Applying for things you may not be entirely prepared for, sharing a piece of work, making conversation with someone you look up to/admire, or taking a risk on yourself/your dreams can pay off immeasurably. It's hard to do any of these things if you're constantly second guessing your abilities.

Social skills. Because we regulate our self esteem needs externally a lot of the time, we are more likely to develop the ability to talk to people and socialise effectively, as well as excell in areas like performance or public speaking. Whether you want to be liked, respected, or just given attention and reaction regardless of what kind, chances are that without even realising it you have built up a load of social skills to get you there.

Potential for cognitive empathy without being emotionally impacted. This is absolutely not always the case, and more often than not people with NPD also struggle with cognitive empathy. But if you do have an interest in increasing your cognitive empathy or already have plenty, it can be super useful. Where others might well up with tears or become just as affected upon meeting their friend in a bad state, we might think clearer and be more capable of offering useful/necessary support. We might be able to hear about something incredibly traumatic or dark without needing to shut the conversation down for comfort or time and space to emotionally regulate after, etc.

Passionate and knowledge-seeking. Whether it's something that involves our values, a topic we care a lot about, style or media that relates strongly to our self image, or a desire to be sure we can speak confidently or know the most about a subject, we are often willing to go above and beyond in our research. When we care about something, we care a LOT and are intent on making sure we can speak knowledgeably on it. We may even be passionate about educating others on it.

Leadership skills. Okay, this one is a pretty obvious one, but I feel like it should be said anyway. Not all of us care for power specifically, but we can perform extremely well in these situations. It can be brilliant for both our self esteem and the success of others. The world needs people who thrive and excel in leadership positions, and it's often a very demanding role. If you care about creating a good environment and the overall success of your team/project, it's very likely you will have or be capable of developing the people and organisation skills required.

Capable of huge personal change/growth. We may not respond very well at all if someone is asking us to change, or implying that we should. BUT! If we genuinely want to grow/change our lives in some way, practically nothing will stop us. We can brute force our way into meeting so many goals or achievements, and we will go above and beyond for personal growth. Even if we go through an extremely vulnerable or depressive phase, we inevitably spring back to all our glory, because we know we are meant for so much more. We aren't as likely to succumb to social pressures and shut down our drive to improve something.

Encouraging others. Because we often do need some form of positive social response to maintain a decent level of self esteem, we KNOW what makes a damn good compliment. We can be the best at raising someone's self esteem or helping them with insecurities, because we know exactly what we want to hear and can apply this to what others need or value most.

That's all!! I know this was quite long, so thank you very much if you read all the way through, I wanted to make sure I went in depth as I feel things like this are really hard to find. Maybe you share some of these traits, or maybe you have your own list of positives. Feel free to share your own positives or thoughts in the comments/reblogs, this took quite a bit of time so I'd like to know what others think!!

[narc-rants]

Are there any healthy ways a Narcissist can fuel their Narcissistic Supply? /gen

Finally gonna compile a list! If anyone has ideas to add, feel free to comment and I can add em

Healthy ways to get narcissistic supply

1. Making things for others

Art is a great way to get supply! It not only gives you supply from seeing others’ satisfaction from something you did, it also gets you in touch with your own talents, boosting your self esteem in your artistic gifts, something you have control over improving upon

• Gifts like diy projects, handmade notes/cards, drawings, etc. for people you know

• Holiday goodie bags for the office or your peers for more low-effort impersonal gifts

• Selling art commissions, bringing strangers’ or internet mutuals’ ideas to life with your drawings

• Selling projects on Etsy or in-person craft fairs

2. Performance Arts and Sports

Extracurricular activities can be great for our self esteem and mental health. Connecting our body to our mind can help center us in the present and invest us in the future so we’re able to see the physical results of our effort and progress over time, as well as the praise of others from watching us succeed or win. Many of these also come with physical awards that we can display or show off to others

• Performance arts like dance, singing, plays/musicals, ballet, etc

• Group sports like football, baseball, soccer, etc

• Solo-centered sports like gymnastics, ice skating, karate, track/cross country, swimming, weight lifting, etc

3. Non-Physical Competitive Activities

Not everyone is able-bodied or has an interest in physical competition or activities, so there are many others that are just as engaging and rewarding that don’t require the physical labor. Sometimes all you want is to feel like the smartest or most creative rather than the fastest or strongest

• Visual arts like film, photography, sculpture, painting, etc. can be done individually and posted online or can be done in clubs and classes where you can still feel a sense of community and positive competition

• Competitive club activities like chess, debate, robotics/engineering can be done in school or outside of it

• Competitive games like DND and other tabletop games can be played with friends or others

• Video games or other competitive online games with friends or strangers

• Written arts like story writing, essays, and poetry can also be done in and out of school, in group or solo settings, and can be entered into competitions or submitted online

4. Self-Competitive Activities

Not all competition has to be “other” based, sometimes it can be extremely rewarding to win without other players or parties involved. You can improve your scores or times, or simply prove to yourself that you’re capable of overcoming something mentally challenging

• Online solo-player video games, story games, or puzzle apps

• Hand-held puzzles like rubics cubes or other puzzle/trick boxes or fidgets

• Single-player board games, puzzles, or card games

5. Non-Competitive Activities

Not all activities need to be based on competition to be rewarding or give you supply throughout your “progress” or when you get new ideas. Sometimes hobbies can be self-rewarding or even earn compliments from others without prompting

• Fashion and style, including DIY clothing and jewelry for yourself

• Collecting things for your special interest or other interest such as dolls, posters, figures, merch, etc.

• Fanfiction writing, fanart posting, or other forms of visual and written art to be posted on social media sites where you can receive praise and feedback

6. Community Service

As lame as it can sound to some, “community service” doesn’t necessarily have to be a chore. It can be rewarding to do things that benefit others while also getting a boost yourself. And not all community service is volunteer-work, some opportunities may include pay or a career path. Sometimes helping others that you have a complex about being “above” can give you a lot of supply and make you feel empowered

• Animal welfare work like volunteering in shelters or veterinary clinics, work in sanctuaries and farms, pet sitting or dog walking

• Working with children at shelters, schools, after school programs, babysitting

• Social justice work like protesting, organizing events, and working with others in your local community to create change

• Making blankets, serving food, running groups for houseless or domestic violence shelters

7. Work / School

Supply doesn’t have to come from something extracurricular, it can also come from your performance in work or school. Promotions, praise from your boss or coworkers, and succeeding in projects can all be fulfilling. Praise from teachers, high grades, and turning in exemplary work can also be fulfilling. Sometimes it depends on your career / education path, as you may need to tailor your choice to what kind of supply is strongest for you!

• Competition: law, sales, real estate, finances, business, sports

• Creation: classic arts, writing or transcribing, digital art, design, tech, programming, secretarial work, journalism, architecture, building/fixing work

• Community Aid: psychiatry, medical, veterinary, teaching general or special ed, social work

[a-sip-of-milo]

NPD Resources Masterlist

[BPD]

The official resources masterlist for NPD. Includes all the links I've shared in the past and stuff I haven't.

Any posts I've linked about supporting those with NPD have been put in the misc section because I do not want to take away from what this post is really about, which is helping people with NPD, not the people around them.

Diagnostic criteria

NPD diagnostic criteria, rewritten by someone who has it

Official diagnostic criteria

An explanation of the diagnostic criteria

Recovery resources FOR the narcissist

NPD recovery resources

How to find therapy for NPD, common types of therapy and signs of an abusive/toxic therapist

Narcissist supply

What is narc supply?

Things that can give a narcissist supply

NPD stigma

The perception of NPD symptoms vs. how a narcissist might actually experience them

Why those with NPD have a hard time seeking help (spoiler alert: it's not because they're unaware)

A plea from someone with NPD (and some resources debunking common misconceptions)

Narcissism is not abusive / abuse is abusive

Debunking common myths on NPD

Common disproven myths about NPD

Miscellaneous

How to support someone with NPD

NPD Carrd (What is NPD, dpt skills and self-help)

Unravelling the connection: npd as a trauma response

NPD terminology (do's and dont's)

NPD safe blogs

@empath-abuse-awareness

@enigma-in-reality

@loverofmirage

@the-npd-culture-is

@nicepersondisorder

@theegosystem

@mischiefmanifold

NPD positivity so you don't have to go looking

Reblog to kiss a narcissist on the forehead

Reblog to tell your local narcissist that they're the best ever

Happy NPD appreciation day

Positivity for systems with NPD

Be normal about narcissists unless it's to give them love

NPD should be EPD (Epic Personality Disorder)

Of course I have a praise kink, I have NPD

Narcissists are so beautiful and handsome and wonderful

Positivity for narcissists who like sex

I love my narcissists

Aromantic narcissists are amazing

Narcissists I love you

Easy ways to spot a narcissist (it's not what you think <;3)

Narcissists deserve to be loved

As usual, if something needs to be deleted because it's wrong/comes from a toxic author/etc. please let me know. I tried to look on Google but all I found was ableist shit, so these are all found by your fellow narcissists on tumblr :)

Edit: If you have any resources, please send them to me through an ask or DM and i'll check it out/add it!

[thevampirenarc]

So You've Learned You Have NPD

Realising you have NPD can be incredibly heavy. It is very common to feel lost, afraid or angry about this condition, which might feel like it’s come out of nowhere. For many of us, identifying our NPD can cause an intense "narc crash" or ego collapse as we are confronted with an acknowledgment of our deepest wounds and flaws, accompanied with a damning narrative from the outside world that we are irreparably broken, evil, and so on...it can also be incredibly difficult to find support or help, as some therapists may refuse to work with us, and the internet is full of ableism and vitriol that encourages our suffering.

The heaviest part of my realisation was believing that having NPD meant I was unfixable and doomed to suffer forever, that I was trapped and would never be able to escape the pain I caused myself and others. It felt like confirmation of my deepest wounds: that I was inherently bad, fucked up, unlovable and rotten at my core. Due to the intense stigma NPD carries, I felt like I couldn’t tell a soul without being rejected and hated. I felt isolated and alone and what I really needed was someone to see me and say, "you're gonna be okay."

If you’ve recently discovered that you have NPD and you're feeling lost, alone, angry or confused, I wrote this post for you.

Seek Community

All of the best advice, support and comfort I’ve received—not only for NPD, but for all of my disabilities and mental health issues—has come from community. Community holds a wealth of knowledge and frees us from feeling trapped, alone and misunderstood. To quote an anon's advice, “Community is hard to manage, care for and understand, but it is worth it.” This disorder makes connections with others difficult, confusing and often triggering, and fostering community can be hard work at times, but it is worth it. Isolation feeds the fear and shame.

Tumblr, Instagram, Reddit, Discord and so on—pretty much all social platforms have cluster B spaces and PD spaces where you will find people who see you as a human being, who will offer their advice and perspectives without judgment, and who don't need you to mask to celebrate you.

Safe Resources

The internet is full of demonisation, stigma and cruelty. You will come across things like “how to destroy a narcissist”. You will hear ableist rhetoric. Do not listen to that shit. Here are some safe places to find resources.

HealNPD on Youtube

NPD Recovery 2.2 Discord Server

@/npddiaries, @/pathologicalnarcissus, @/spirit.narc, @/neurodivergent.elf, @/autisticallyurs and more on Instagram (not all of these ppl have NPD but still have useful info, remember to check out highlights as well as grid posts!)

I also recommend my own account (of course, lol) and especially my post on Self Neglect, which includes a section about approaching healing when parts of ourselves are resistant to it. 

There are also so many potentially beneficial therapies, depending on what you want to work on, what you have access to, and what feels right for you. REBT or DBT might help if you struggle with a lot of unhelpful thought processes, emotional regulation and intense anger or distress. EMDR might help if you have a lot of PTSD symptoms or intrusive traumatic memories. CFT, IFS therapy, or shadow work might help with processing shame and reintegrating the parts of yourself that you are rejecting/suppressing/shutting out. Therapy can come in many forms: on your own with a workbook or journal; one-on-one online or in person; in a group setting, or as part of a programme. Even if you're not aiming for remission/recovery, there's probably something among those that can help your day-to-day life.

Therapy is really hard. It requires you to engage with your vulnerable self, the one you probably spend most of your time burying. I recommend taking your time and prioritising building rapport with a therapist (if you're working with one) and making sure they know their stuff and respect you as their client. You can't always wait until you feel safe and ready to be vulnerable because that might not come, but you can work on making sure you're cared for and supported even when it's hard and scary.

Words of Affirmation

There are a lot of unhelpful and untrue narratives surrounding NPD, as with all stigmatised conditions. Here are some truths that I have learned and I want you to know, if that feels helpful for you.

You can heal. Remission is possible. Change is possible. Your brain has neuroplasticity, and that means it can form new neural pathways and rewire itself with time and practice. If you have a habit, behaviour or thought pattern that isn’t serving you, it is totally possible to change it into something better. All that you have learned can be unlearned. You can heal.

You are not evil. There is no disorder or disability that inherently makes someone a bad person. Lack of or lower empathy isn’t evil. Attention-seeking or egocentrism isn’t evil. All people of all neurotypes have the capacity to cause harm or make bad decisions, and maybe you have hurt others and done things you aren't proud of, but you are not a monster. You don’t deserve to be dehumanised. You are not evil.

You deserve to have boundaries. Having NPD or any disorder does not mean you are inherently “manipulative”, "overdramatic" and “noncompliant” and therefore deserve to have your agency stolen and your boundaries eroded. Your needs are valid and your feelings matter. You are as deserving of autonomy and support as anyone else. You deserve to have boundaries.

You are already worthy. People with NPD typically have a deep-rooted sense of shame that drives a lot of the aggressive/defensive, self-enhancing and perfectionist behaviours. Learning to release yourself from shame is the key to getting better. You are good enough. Imperfect and messy, you are good enough. When you make a mistake or you make choices you aren’t proud of, you are good enough. You don’t have to evade, attack or deny, because your worth cannot be diminished by any imperfection. You are already worthy.

And Finally...

A little request from my fellow NPDers—if you have any other suggestions, advice or words of support for the newly diagnosed or questioning folk, please feel invited to include them in the reblogs or replies of this post so we can collate some resources here for those who need them :)

[egocompletionist]

Maintaining Grandiosity in NPD

These are a few things that help ME maintain a more grandiose level of functioning. It is not encouragement of unhealthy behaviour or clinical/therapeutic advice, obviously. This is designed for others with NPD who are looking for ways to productively embrace their grandiose feelings.

1) Remember: reality is not purely objective or purely based in the tangible. I do NOT advise this kind of mindset to anyone who is prone to psychosis or disconnection from reality in maladaptive/unhealthy ways, as a disclaimer (unless you're into that kinda thing, of course). But it's as simple as looking at perception of colour to prove that objective reality is questionable. Is a person who can't distinguish between greens and reds incapable of seeing those colours, or does colour exist differently for them? Beyond this, though, just looking at what is tangible may feel crushing sometimes. It is not worth getting bogged down in exactly how the world is showing up for you right now. Time is just a perspective in which we view the world from. If you KNOW your reality is destined, let it be. Stop finding reasons to question it. Perfection can mean what you choose, it already does.

2) There is no 'when', you already ARE. Hear me out. One of the most under looked aspects of NPD in my opinion, is the desperation to be an 'ideal' self. Of course this is not an excess of self love, but I'd argue it is an obsession with one's own potential. I mean, this goes all the way back to Narcissus. It can feel impossible to feel whole and complete right now, in some ways being wired this way does mean you're always striving for something 'more'. I won't deny that. What I will say, is do not let yourself get attached to the gap between you and your goal. Keep looking back on how much progress you've made, acknowledge that for what it really took. But all you ever will be is currently part of you already. Let yourself embody the ideal, preemptively. Don't just project it and perform it, but come to realise it already is you. People don't have to recognise it for it to be true; all those huge artists or incredible people you admire or wish to embody an aspect of, their life once was as messy or un-ideal as yours may feel. Almost every relatable character that feels clear cut and easy to consume, perfectly fitting the narrative despite their complexity, put them into this reality? They would be completely unrecognised and unknown by most, to begin with at least.

3) Self-repulsion is an attempt at defending from humiliation. Kill this as much as you can. For many of us, the instinct to be repulsed by aspects of ourselves is very prevalent. Usually this has something to do with what we've been taught disdain for in our upbringing. Sometimes this aligns with our values, sometimes this is completely in opposition to them. Generally this instinct exists to protect ourselves. To pre-emptively imagine the judgement or humiliation we may receive and self correction to avoid it. It can absolutely be useful in some cases, it means we are heavily aware of perception where others aren't. But in practice, speaking from experience, we are more often than not just us tearing ourselves apart before others get the chance to. Often times to me, the imagined insult is more impactful than any I could receive. 99/100 times, the best move is to take a meditative approach. Let the judgement ebb and flow and just watch it from the outside. Don't allow it to hijack your feelings, don't assign it meaning.

4) Do you care what THEY think, or what the imagined audience thinks? It's all about the narrative, to me. It's almost impossible to entirely to detach from others' opinions of you impacting your own to a degree, sure. But the larger, more conceptual audience is more important. They are not reading the novel written by that guy, they are reading YOURS. The audience is not watching some random dude's perspective on your story, they are watching YOU on screen. People's perception matters and does have an impact on your life, of course, but nobody wants to watch some random guy talking about the main character the whole movie, never get a taste of the action. They care about the main character's experience and perspective.

Well, that's all. Take what you like, leave what doesn't, etc. Feel free to share your thoughts or add on your own tips, it would be much appreciated!! If this helps or you are interested in similar topics, do let me know, as this took quite some time!

[a-jagged-nightmare]

NPD Negative Splitting Advice

PT: NPD Negative Splitting Advice /End Pt

I wrote this in a friend server a while ago, and figured it was time to transfer it here, so more people can get use of it. This is based off mine and another members experience with our NPD splits, and how we cope, though a lot of the tips are vague enough they can probably help several PDs. This is split into External Splits (Splitting on others) and Internal Splits (Splitting on yourself), though both can happen at once).

Neg External Splitting Advice

Pt: Negative External Splitting Advice /End Pt

Oftentimes, we're just angry. And we've noticed this tends to be a common theme. If you can find a way to redirect the anger that's always great. Anything from tearing/breaking things, screaming (even into a pillow), writing/reading fanfic, or just writing about the situation (either personally or to someone completely outside the situation) can help. Just get it out. Trying to swallow it will make it last longer and is a lot more annoying to cope with (though not impossible). Random thing that helps me as an anger holder: downing powder candy. Idk why, but it chills me out super fast so take that how you will. Basically look into anger management strategies here. Your anger is not wrong. It is not useless. It is important and it is valuable. But you will also get stuck in it if you aren't careful, and that will hurt you. You do not deserve to be hurt.

Don't be afraid to tell them "hey, my brain's being weird right now. I need to step back for both our sakes. I can explain better once my brain chills out later". Space helps. Don't keep retriggering yourself. Mute them if you have to. Leave the room/area if it's in person. Take that break. You're allowed to and deserve your space to figure it out.

If you want to go the swallowing the anger route: distractions. These will be helpful either way, but especially helpful with this route. Music, friends, art. Hell music and art is still a good way to redirect anger, directly or indirectly. Cold showers are also great, as is exercise. Just anything to get your mind off the topic, especially if it's something you enjoy. You deserve to relax some after everything after all.

Negative Internal Splitting Advice

Pt: Negative Internal Splitting Advice /End Pt

So while a lot of our advice on External Splits involve getting away, we tend to suggest the opposite for self splits. This is because there's a lot of devaluation going on, and it's important to help find a way to address this.

Talk to someone you trust about what caused the split, or about what you're feeling. I know it might be hard or scary, but their support can do a long way in helping you feel better. You deserve and are worthy of being seen, heard, and supported.

If you can't talk to someone, writing it out is another good option. Even if you delete (digital) or destroy (physical) it afterwards. Keeping it in doesn't do much good. Getting it out will help with regulation. After that, get some supply. Again you can ask someone (promise it's not invalid or cheating), but there's also this compliment generator. This masterpost also has some npd based positivity post at the bottom, and it's an old inactive count but @npd-positivity is a nice account to scroll through as well.

Affirmations tend to help us a lot. If we notice a lot of "I don't deserve" trying to actively fight against that, or reason against that has been what helps the best. It can be hard, especially at the start, but it does get easier over time.

In general, distractions and doing something you enjoy is a good idea. The sooner you can get your mind to stop circling this, the sooner it will let up in most cases. Comfort shows, writing, reading, music, crafting, etc are all great ideas.

And for both..

Pt: And for both.. /End Pt

Eventually (not when you're in the midst of it good god, but either when you're coming or are out of it) please consider actually confront why you got triggered. Look at what triggered this, and why. It'll give you something to work on to help avoid it in the future. It'll take time, and a lot of work, but it's worth it. And it's definitely a vulnerable state to put yourself in, so take care of yourself when you do so. Reward yourself for admitting it, or even just taking a look. It could be you felt threatened, you felt like you were being left out, etc. Once you start noticing these patterns, you can catch them, and address them individually better. It might be hard, but it's worth it.