Shout out to people with Complex Dissociative Disorders (parents edition):
If your parents genuinely changed and improved overtime
If your parents were absent when you were a kid because they were sick / ill / working / otherwise indisposed
If your parents were not your abusers
If your parents would have acted differently if they knew you were being abused
If your parents didn't have the resources or knowledge to help / understand you
If your parents were loving and yet still neglectful
If your parents inadvertently invalidated / didn't believe you, but now do
If your parents weren't your primary caregivers when the abuse happend
If you weren't abused at all and your trauma was medical / environmental / etc
Had emotionally and physically present parents but you still had disorganized attachment with them as a kid because of your delusions / paranoia / etc.
If your parents regret how they treated you
If your parents loved and love you but acted the way they did because of substances / mental illness
If your parents are not completely bad people, or bad people at all
If you still get along with your parents regardless of what they did
If you ever invalidated your own traumatic childhood experiences because your parents were "too nice"
Your trauma is not less valid if you get along with your parents today. Sure, you needed disorganized attachment to your primary caregivers as a kid to develop a CDD. But that can take plenty of formes, and they don't all include your parents being monsters.
Edit: any other emotions regarding your parents are also valid and okay, and I couldn't mean that more. Childhood trauma survivors go through so many rough emotions, and self-invalidation is sadly way too common. Your feelings are a direct result of what happened and that makes them normal.
