My tribute to the original Excalibur X-men team
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My tribute to the original Excalibur X-men team
I’ve had just about my fill of foolishness
(Avengers Volume 9 #23)
Favourite Lesser Known Blorbo: Round One Match Three
Wendi Harris
Joyboy
The Avengers VS Black Cat, Kang and the Technet
Black Cat and "Walter Hardy" are chased by the Avengers in the space casino. During the chase, it turns out that "Walter Hardy" is actually Kang in disguise and he had recruited Black Cat to help him in stealing the Space MacGuffin item from the casino for his schemes. However, Kang has difficulty in keeping up the pace in running away since he is more used to using hi-tech weapons, soldiers and strategies in fighting the Avengers instead of doing physical work. The Avengers (Scarlet Witch, Storm and Vision) eventually catch up with Black Cat and Kang but the latter (Kang) has another trick up his sleeve. Gatecrasher of the Technet shows up to sucker-punch Scarlet Witch. It also turns out that the alien mercenaries - the Technet were also recruited by Kang and Black Cat to keep the Avengers distracted so that they could steal the item. Scarlet Witch, Storm, Vision, Sam Wilson, Carol Danvers and Iron Man fight the Technet to a stand-still while Black Cat and Kang run off. The Avengers manage to shake off the Technet and they eventually catch up with Black Cat and Kang. However, as Kang passes the MacGuffin item to Carol, she opens up the casing, only to find that it's empty. Somehow, they are tricked by the two thieves.
Avengers v9 #23, 2025
Meet Hard Boiled Henwy! Scourge of all!
So in another post, I made reference to hard Boiled Henwy, and was asked for an explanation by @thefingerfuckingfemalefury ... Which is a reasonable request.
Back in the 90's, the Britain based x-book Excalibur had sort of fallen into an unsatisfying langour.
After the gleeful insanity of the early Chris Claremont written, Alan Davis pencilled romps involving the Warwolves, the Crazy Gang and the Cross Time Caper (Even if that DID go on too long). Davis left after 17 issues, and Claremont after 27 issues, and no one seemed to quite know how to deal with a team which wasn't the usual X-Men fare.
So, in issue 42, Alan Davis returned as artist AND writer and the series reached new heights, as Davis did know how to deal with them and had no problem embracing the weird and just plain cosmically silly! It's hard to think of a better exemplar than this, the cover of Davis' first issue
And worry not, we are soon to meet this agent of doom! And even witness his creation!
Because Davis immediately returns to one of the most outlandish teams introduced in the title: The Technet! The Technet are a VERY long story in and of themselves (Involving Alan Moore, Alan Davis, Doctor Who Weekly, and Captain Britain), but they are summarised in the first panel, so don't worr about it.
Just know that Gatecrasher is the large lady who leads this motley team, and she has a grudge against the Excalibur team, and has a capture contract on Phoenix to deliver.
So we cut to the Excalibur team having breakfast in their lighthouse home (and base of operations) which is going normally, until Meggan tries to boil an egg.
What horror could emerge? What unspeakable nightmare lurks within this calcium cage?
If you guessed a psychopathic, genetically engineered, self-destructing Tweety Bird, congratulations!
Now, whilst Henwy is something of a one shot wonder (literally) fret not, because Gatecrasher can, and has, made others in the years since, all called Hard Boiled Henwy because why change a winning formula?