As a transgender or nonbinary person, there are many ways you might choose to transition or transition options that might not be for you.
That’s great! It’s good to know the right choices for you. These are person choices, and your gender deserves to be respected regardless of what you do or don’t do.
However, if there is a type of transition you choose not to engage with, then you should be as respectful as anyone else who doesn’t have that experience. It is not your experience to be disrespectful of. You should not be talking over other people with that experience.
The fact that a type of transition isn’t for you does not mean it’s okay for you to talk about it like it’s shallow, violent, silly, ugly, wrong, stupid, unnecessary, weird, or in any other stigmatizing way.
If you talk about transitional experiences you don’t even have in stigmatizing ways, then you are being transphobic. Yes, no matter if you are trans / nonbinary yourself!
Bottom surgery isn’t for you? Great! It’s still a life-saving and necessary surgery that faces stigma.
Hormones aren’t your thing? Nice! It’s still a life-saving and necessary treatment option for many people who face stigma and difficulties accessing it.
Legal name or gender changes aren’t for you? Sure thing! It is still a necessity for many people when it comes to addressing dysphoria and it’s wrong for you to talk badly about it as an option.
Telling strangers your pronouns isn’t your thing? Cool! You should still be respectful and supportive of trans and nonbinary people who do want or need to do this.
You don’t need to speak about these things in derogatory ways to justify not wanting them. It’s okay to not want nor need them, but it’s NOT okay to speak badly of these already stigmatized, over-legislative, hard to access, necessary, and sometimes life saving care. You don’t need to justify your transition decisions, especially not like this.
Basically: be respectful of other trans and nonbinary experiences. If something isn’t your experience then stand back and refer to people who are or have experienced it.
Don’t be transphobic and then act like it’s okay because you’re trans / nonbinary. In some ways it’s worse than cis people doing the same thing, because you’re using your trans / nonbinary identity to validate bigotry. That’s wrong.
