BWAAAAAAAHHH
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BWAAAAAAAHHH
Today was dope.
I had the half day client appointment today. First off…
The client combined my social rate and regular incall rate so that he could pay for our 2 hour picnic at a cheaper rate than our sexy time (my regular rate). I actually had a client do this once. At first, I was annoyed as shit that he bypassed my regular 3 hour rate by combining my 2 hour social rate with my 1 hour regular rate. Then, I realized it wasn’t a terrible idea. It’s better to capture clients for as much money possible rather than not have them book at all. Because my social rate is pretty affordable, today’s client decided to add that time to his already 3 hour regular booking. I would have made more money had he just booked my 5 hour rate but I was happy to get him for the reduced 2 hour (social) rate plus regular 3 hour rate. It still turned out to be a lot of money.
Anyway, picnic boy meant to prepare all of the picnic food at his house the night before. He wanted to make it a really special picnic for us. But he worked for 12 hours at his office yesterday and didn’t have time when he got home. Instead, he picked up my favorite snacks at Whole Foods in his lunch break today: flaxseed crackers, smoked salmon, and olive tapenade. He also introduced me to stuffed grape leaves. Wow! That was my first time eating them and they’re wonderful.
He chose a hotel that was connected to a gorgeous man-made park. The park connected to the hotel and is also in the middle of a corporate office park. The park had winding stone and concrete paths, little bridges, and water features. I drive past this office park often and didn’t know this park was hidden back there. It was like a small, enchanted forest. We picnicked at a table somewhere inside the little forest.
He turned out to look like a turtle a little but he was cool as hell. He’s a straitlaced, very organized, very by-the-book white guy in his early 50’s. But he looks kind of young for his age. He’s very considerate, a little sweet, very intelligent, and well-read. He has a tattoo sleeve on each arm which betrays his nerdiness and makes him kind of sexy.
By the time we were done with our snack dinner, I had too many mosquito bites. We took a stroll through the forest and then went up to the hotel room he booked. We meant to get into the shower together but we went straight to sex. Sex was “meh” but I was super turned on despite the fact. He had the right touch but a bad stroke.
While we were planning today’s date earlier this week, he told me to come prepared for a swim. I didn’t think he was serious about taking a dip in the hotel pool but he sure as hell was. I was grateful because it meant it would eat into the 3 hours he booked for sexy time.
OMFG, I was so cold. The hotel room was already cold, the entire hotel was cold, so I was freezing on the walk down to the pool. Just thinking about how cold the pool would be made matters worse. Before we left the room wearing our robes, I made sure to crank the heat up in the room so I could return to a nice, warm, and cozy temperature!
To make matters even worse, when we got downstairs, there were instructions for everyone to shower in the locker rooms before getting into the pool. Turtle Man is a by-the-book, rule-following nerd so I ended up showering in the locker room before getting into the pool.
The pool water was kind of warm but not warm enough. I was still freezing and shivered for the first 5 minutes in the water until I calmed down. We have pretty good rapport so we never had any awkward moments during the entire date including pool time.
When we got out of the pool, I was still super cold. Turtle helped me wrap up into 2 large towels and we headed back to the room where we played with my vibrator and chilled a bit more. He has a day of outdoors activities tomorrow so he decided to leave 15 minutes early so he could get some sleep back at home. I’m always happy when clients end the session early.
It was such a great appointment that went so smoothly and I actually like the client.
After watching an episode of Crash Zoom, I decided I draw Jon as a turtle since his VA, Eddie Bowley, voiced Turtle Man ^^
Jon @ Eddsworld
Crash Zoom (C) Thomas Ridgewell & Eddie Bowley
Art (C) @kadiwright
I like to think that Kora took the last name of her chaotic super-sister, Johnson
"Xadani". #turtle #turtles #turtleturtle #turtlesofinstagram #turtletuesday #turtleconservation #turtlelover #turtlepower #turtletattoo #turtleman #turtlelovers #turtleneck #turtlelife #turtlelove #turtlegram #turtletime #turtleisland #turtlebaby #turtlerescue #turtlebay #turtlebeach #turtlebayresort #turtledove #turtlenecksweater #turtleday #turtlepond #turtleboy #turtleofinstagram (en Mexico) https://www.instagram.com/p/B7yc9Qxhg7O/?igshid=dlyrgbzee7v4
15th anni - get yourself a bassist that can do all of the above. he only comes in a pack with yellow crocs, though
#funny #funnyvideos #life #turtle #turtles #turtlesofinstagram #art #travel #reptile #pet #turtlepower #nature #turtleman #instagram #funny #tortoise #cute #drawing #turtlenecksweater #pets #turtletuesday #travelphotography #seaturtle #turtleturtle #love #sea #mothernature #viral #followme #ocean https://www.instagram.com/p/BwpvzxpgMY3/?igshid=7xp57urptjt9
A Turtle, an Old Man, and a Key
(Part 1) | (Part 2) | (Part 3) | (Part 4) |
11-9-18, System 43, Onboard Ship – Preparing to Launch
Bethany the Special Forces Warrior of Earth was adjusting nicely to the Kirothian ship she had only just started to crew on. Having been on board for a full Earth day, she was excited when the ship began its preparations to launch on its next journey. She was on board as a Peace Delegation without an official role on the ship’s actual crew. She was going to find an unofficial one as soon as possible. She believed that the best way to make connections and to initiate the famed “Human Pack Bonding” was by being actively involved with those around her. She had her limits to how much social interaction she would be able to handle but the newness and just wow factor of finally crewing on a ship would provide her enough social energy for a very long time.
After waking up on board for the first time, a strange experience in and of itself, she dressed in her uniform and headed towards the cafeteria. Making her way through the levels, responding to any greetings sent her way. More of the crew were able to say her name correctly now, after an extensive lesson in how her name was pronounced after supper the night before.
It had turned out that the Kirothian that had approached her first yesterday was named Ka’lari and was an engineer in the lower hyper engine. Ka’Lari was on the younger side for a Kirothian, only 82 Kirothian years. In a species that lived close to 500 years, if Bethany made an equivalent to the human lifespan, Ka’lari was about 18. Kirothians matured at about 50 but were still largely considered minors and the equivalent of teens until about 100.
Ka’lari was the first to greet Bethany when she walked into the cafeteria and signaled her over to her table after Bethany grabbed her food. When Bethany sat down Ka’lari greeted her.
“Hello, Bethany. Have good morning?” Ka’lari was a fast learner when it came to languages, through the translator she had explained that since she also saw the functions of the engine as a language, with the advanced technology of the hyper engines, Ka’Lari worked with the energies and the way the energies fluctuated and the changing of the engine as much as any mechanical part. When she applied her language theory to anything she learned she found it much easier to learn and understand. Bethany honestly didn’t get it but she appreciated the fact that it would be less than a month before Ka’lari would be fluent in English.
After returning the greeting to Ka’lari and saying hello to the other occupants of the table she tucked into her breakfast. She had a long day of getting “settled” and “becoming familiar” she was sure that this was actually meant to mean “go find and pack bond like a good human”. Honestly the whole human race found the impression the greater space population had of them rather comical. Sure, humans sought companionship but the levels many aliens seemed to think all humans needed was very exaggerated. If she hadn’t had Ka’lari approach her, Bethany would have survived by communicating and messaging with her other friends who had been placed in other fleets around the Galaxy.
“Bethany, knowledge of creature turtle?”
Bethany looked up startled. “Huh?”
Ka’lari grinned. “Turtle? What knowledge have you?”
“A turtle? Why would you be asking about a turtle?”
Kalari grabbed a tablet that was being held by another Kirothian who had introduced himself as Zch’lino. The screen displayed a picture of an older human man who was holding a snapping turtle. Bethany had to read through the first few lines of the story before she realized what it was she was looking at.
A snort and a sputter of laughter escaped before she slapped a hand over her mouth to keep the laughter in. It was a picture of the so called “Turtleman” from Kentucky. He had been dead for many years now but he had apparently just made into the Kirothian news cycle. Only reason she knew of him was the fact that it was discovered that a majority of the “turtles” Turtleman had caught over his career and his TV series, were actually a form of a race called Persuniks. A shapeshifting, aquatic species that had crashed onto earth at about 1896 A.D.. They had taken a general form of snapping turtles and just existed that way until they revealed themselves after The First Contact Off World.
The Persuniks had been allowed to decide whether to stay on earth or leave as only a few were still of the originals who had been born on their home world. About 2,000 Persuniks had been transported back to their planet in the following year. The existence of the Persuniks on Earth had actually been a blessing in disguise because the fact that another semi- to fully intelligent species had lived on Earth for so long without coming to major harm proved that Humanity was mature enough to step foot into the wider galaxy.
After finally calming herself down she managed to get her explanation typed out on the tablet. “I’m going to jump over a few steps and hopefully explain what you are misunderstanding. That man is now dead and he had a career as a creature catcher. When the Human people discovered that the Persuniks had been living on Earth as turtles it took a few months before someone, as a meme, made the connection to the “Turtleman”. After analyzing footage and taking with the Persunik people themselves we actually discovered that Turtleman was one of the few humans aware that the Persuniks were an alien people not just turtles.”
The Kirothians thought this over for a minute or two before the one called Ki’loke asked, “What is meme?”
Oh no. She was no ready to eplain that key bit of human culture.