Hello isat 2nd anniversary. I still love you isat. I am writing. Just. Very slowly.
Here is a bit more of that "what if Siffrin didn't have any party members" fic as celebration.
-
Dying never feels like sleeping. No matter by tear or sadness or a blood piercing attack from the King, the darkness that falls after is all the same. Sensation, then nothing. That’s it. “Nothing” isn’t calm or restful like sleep, nor is it as potentially fretful.
In one moment you are, then you’re not.
When you open your eyes in the meadow, you don’t so much wake up as you reset. A spark goes up in your chest as you gasp awake. With it, everything floods into you like a dry riverbank during a storm. Your nerves flare to life all at once, clicking your body into place.
It’s only a moment, a single breath, but it feels as if the Universe itself places you down in the meadow and commands you to breathe. And what can you do except follow? It would be nicer if the Universe eased you out of the darkness, but what can you do?
(What can you do except keep going?)
You keep your eyes open and stare at the clouds. They wisp around in familiar patterns, dancing unperturbed to the infinite miracles that exist below them.
(…Miracles?)
You pause and consider.
You should be dead, except you’re not, and time craft should kill you but it doesn’t, so yes, in most ways this is a miracle. Fantastical. Impossible. Without you, the King would surely win, but even with your help, you would be dead floor 1 to that blinding rock without this boon. So you suppose this is what most would consider a miracle.
But, aren’t miracles supposed to be good? How is dying over and over again good? You’re here to make sure everything will be unfrozen, but here you are living these same two days ad infinitum.
Is what you’re doing good? It has to be. Why else would the Universe ensure your task could be complete? Your victory has been woven into the Universe’s design, and your job is to find the path. There’s no use in wondering if what you’re doing is good. You’re the Savior. Sacrifices were always meant to be made. These loops are a miracle bestowed upon you for all others' sake, and acting like you deserve anything more is selfish.
You stare at the clouds. The tail of a wispy one curls in another. At first, it stays apart, a mass more than a cloud, but you can see the wispy tail slowly disappearing from its companion. Second by second, the clouds crawl across the sky and turn from two into one. If you hadn’t been watching, you would have never known they were ever apart.
…still, it would be so much easier if you weren't alone in fighting the King.
It would be nice, if your miracle wasn’t so lonely. Maybe then, someone could help you with the shield, or maybe, even learn it themself? No, no, that would be asking too much. Maybe the person could encourage you! Yeah! Spending every hour of every loop wouldn’t feel so awful if you had someone to talk to. You could even strategize! Stars, maybe they could figure out a better plan than using a shield.
And then, then maybe, you could… talk about stuff. Nice things. Things about themself! What their home is like.
(You could tell them about the stars.)
Maybe that someone could hug you. If they wanted. If they didn’t, that’s fine. Just being close by would be nice. You could wave, and they could wave back with a smile, just because it was you. Then after you wave, you could go back to studying, but it wouldn’t be lonely. If they were silent, you could look up, and they would be one wave away from seeing you again.
You try to imagine what this companion could look like. Who they could be.
…
……
………Nothing comes to mind, except your own reflection in the third floor mirror.
Stupid, selfish, idiot. It’s horrible to want anyone else in this hell with you. You’re awful. How could you ever even consider it? You are the ONLY aware person here, pretending otherwise is a waste of time.
You force yourself up from the meadow and trudge forward for another loop of studying. You have things to do, and people to save. This miracle is for Vaugarde, not you, and wasting your time feeling sorry for yourself when an entire country is literally frozen in time is awful. Horrible. Selfish. It’s literally the least you can do to suck it up and help them without making it all about you.
Besides, the Universe has always destined for you to be alone. Why would that change now?
Vous gagnez la partie si vous contrôlez un terrain de chaque type de terrain de base et une créature de chaque couleur.
• Victoire de la coalition
• Augure prismatique
• Messager transguilde
Obviously there’s a genuine problem with printing whatever cards you like, because there are expensive cards that are too powerful and could potentially warp the format. But screw it, that’s a conversation we can have at the table AFTER MY I PLAY MY FOURTH MANA CRYPT
