Princess, Take Off Your Pants!!

Hi, I'm *Megan!* My Perfect Asshole My Inspirational Everything My Beautiful Angel Face Baby My Princess Proud Candy Girl *THIS IS NOT A SPOILER FREE BLOG* #xkit_badge {filter: alpha(opacity=50); -moz-opacity: 0.5; -khtml-opacity: 0.5; opacity: 0.5; -webkit-transition: 0.3s ease-in; -moz-transition: 0.3s ease-in; -o-transition: 0.3s ease-in; transition: 0.3s ease-in; } #xkit_badge:hover { opacity: 1; }

[overrunbyfandoms]

Everyone during every episode of She-Ra S5

[foxthebeekeeper]

A neighbor called and said she saw a swarm on a fire hydrant so I grabbed my bucket and ran there as fast as I could. I dabbed some lemongrass oil on the bottom of it and they walked in. After about 5 minutes I just scooped the rest in and bam! Free bees!

I got the queen on the first scoop too though. Apparently she was a new one because she was piping in there really loudly. This is my first personal swarm catch so honestly I’m not sure if that was supposed to happen or not.

[droct0]

What other website am i going to see posts where the op talks about “bam! Free bees!”

[kitbulls]

[bitchwhoyoukiddin]

I feel this is an appropriate post to retell the time my dad got free bees (found an extra thrown swarm) but didn’t have any equipment to transport them, so he just grabbed the queen in a pint jar, let the other swarm into his Ford Escort, and drove down the highway to home with a swarm of bees loose in the car.

I would honestly die of delight to find someone who watched my dad (~72 white guy) driving down a major Illinois highway with a swarm of bees loose in the car just chillin.

I’m sorry, he’s just like that.

[jenifer-likes-pictures]

Imagine getting pulled over by the cops and just turning to the bees like Sic em gang

[accras]

“Right now is a great time to sharpen the little skills, Fine-tune the little habits, and find joy in the little things.” [x]

[taraljc]

OMG HER WEE FAAAAAAAACCCCCEEEE

[memories-are-mine]

Tom: Becky and I are having kids

Lex, Ethan, and Hannah: That’s great! 

Tom: *slams adoption papers on the table* it’s you, sign here

[ethan---green]

They’d do it

[memories-are-mine]

you’re right and you should say it

[foreverfrozensolid]

One day maybe I’ll understand why Disney chose to promote Into the Unknown for Best Original Song while ignoring the best song in Frozen II. 

[etirabys]

…i did not expect to be touched while skimming a reddit thread on fetish origin stories

[milooomilo]

that dudes fetish is called: being a loving and caring dude

[marshmallowbelle]

Alice: Wow Lex, your hair is really pretty today! How'd you get it to look like that?

Lex: His name is Ethan.

[tiredcatperson-deactivated20221]

i deadass forgot these were the same people

THIS HERE IS WHAT ACTING IS ABOUT. DAMMMN

[gone-to-oregone]

AND THATS ON BEING PHENOMENAL ACTORS

[atarnishedcompass]

Friend: Wanna hang out tomorrow?

Me: I actually performed an Activity yesterday. Please wait the three day recovery period to submit another inquiry

[not-easily-brxken]

Obi-Wan: Prince-Consort Bail Organa of Alderaan, I entrust to your keeping one of the children of Anakin Skywalker and Padme Amidala. Hide her well, and keep your family safe.

Bail Organa: I shall raise her as my own child and, when she is of age, send her off to a high-profile job in the Galactic Senate. Also, I shall become one of the main spokespeople for dissent against Emperor Palpatine.

Obi-Wan: That… That is a terrible idea.

Bail Organa: I’m sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of your plan to give Darth Vader’s other kid to Darth Vader’s step-brother on Darth Vader’s home planet.

Obi-Wan: In my defence, Anakin is incredibly dim.

[wont-you-be-my-neighbor-totoro]

My brother: you wanna go to the mall for Black Friday?

Me: *Black Friday flashbacks, all the blood and aliens*

Me: not again...

Him: what?

Me: I won’t be his friendy wend!

[kingjaffejoffer]

Executive chef at a top Thai restaurant tells Gordon Ramsay that his Pad Thai is trash [x]

[minusthelove]

Lmao “what do you want to know from me?” Fuck!

[katjohnadams]

So no one thinks that Gordon’s being “Put in his place” or something, this is from Gordon’s show where he specifically goes to places around the world to be schooled in how they do their cuisine and un-fuck the British (Imperialist but we can’t admit that on TV, but he does hint STRONGLY at it in some episodes) way of cooking “exotic” dishes by learning from the people who do it best.

That’s the world’s most successful chef putting himself in a position to learn from chefs around the world in world-class restaurants, grandmother’s houses, in a cramped make-shift kitchen on a rocking and speeding steam train, and more. He doesn’t shy away from learning from people who’ve never been in the remote vicinity of a culinary arts school or run a “professional” kitchen.

And here he’s showing a chef what he thinks of as Pad Thai and if you don’t think one of the most talented chefs on earth didn’t know he was specifically setting himself up to fail to make a point to his audience, then hopefully you do now! <3 

[brunhiddensmusings]

the context- he wasnt saying ‘heres my world famous pad tai for you to sample, a recipe i hold more dear then my own mother’ its closer to  ‘here, this is how i was taught to cook pad tai in liverpool by a man named charles, how far off am i?’

[adventures-in-a-world-of-fiction]

I also think the precise criticism is interesting. The other chef doesn’t say it’s bad. He definitely doesn’t say it’s trash. He doesn’t say it’s a bad meal. What he says is that it’s not pad thai. It’s been labelled as a specific thing and it doesn’t resemble that thing to someone from that culture.

[severusdefender]

severus in the slytherin common room after calling an assembly: ok level with me, which one of you fucks opened the chamber of secrets? i promise i won’t get mad.

[death-totheauthor]

*Slytherins remain silent*

[glumshoe]

my best OC is Brad Wayne, Bruce’s illegitimate biological child via a totally normal woman he had a fling with when he was younger and didn’t stay in touch with

Brad grew up a totally normal kid, went to college, joined a frat, and decided to get in touch with Bruce, who now has an awkward situation on his hands

now the other Batkids have to deal with fucking Brad Wayne, whose normalacy is absolutely insufferable... he tells Dick to try yoga and suggests that Tim will sleep better if he gets more exercise... Bruce goes out of town and Brad decides it’s time to throw a house party with his frat friends

he’s so good

[glumshoe]

All of Brad’s Bat-siblings are absolutely unprepared to deal with him. They can’t handle it. They can’t even hate him properly, even Damien, because he’s just... he’s not even... he’s just Some Guy™️!

They’re all braced for the inevitable reveal that he’s a villain, an imposter, or an interloper there to usurp the Wayne fortune or spy on Batman. They have all sorts of plans to foil his schemes and the only thing they’re not able to prepare for is the fact that he’s just. Brad. He’s not a bad guy, but he’s not a saint, either—his problems are just so mundane, so ordinary.

They TRY to understand what his life is like, but how are they supposed to relate to someone who doesn’t text back because he’s hungover or his phone died, not because he’s tied up in a death trap somewhere being menaced by someone in a Halloween costume?

No one’s ever tried to ritually sacrifice him before and it shows.

[luckyladylily]

Does he know they are the batfam? Or does he just think it is so cool that his dad has adopted all these kids that needed a home?

[glumshoe]

Oh he has no idea. Brad didn’t grow up in Gotham and isn’t really familiar with its culture, so he thinks it’s an ordinary city with ordinary problems (presumably there’s still a concept of ‘ordinary’ in the DCU).

When someone tries to tell him he laughs it off. Maybe one of his friends asks him about the popular rumor that Bruce Wayne is Batman, but he’s never even contemplated the possibility. Later he’s trying to coax Dick into playing beer pong and loudly tells the story to party guests as a funny anecdote. He thinks the whole concept of Batman is hilarious. Maybe he makes up stories about seeing Batman to impress his family and make himself sound cool.

[jamisings]

Eventually though some bad guy who wants a huge ransom is going to kidnap Brad. What happens then? Does Batman call in a favor to one of the other members of the Justice League or does Damien go out and rescue his brother and tell him he’s the most useless of all his brothers because he’s so ordinary? Because you know if anyone is going to blab it’s going to be Damien.

[glumshoe]

Brad gets kidnapped and Steph and/or Cass rescue him in costume.

Later, in Wayne Manor, he tells his family all about how the Batgirls were totally flirting with him and how he managed to take out a few of the bad guys all by himself.

[glumshoe]

Brad Wayne: “Hey, do you guys think Batman fucks? Like, you think he has ever gotten laid?”

Dick, stiffly: “Um. Yes. I think so.”

Brad: “Really? Guy sounds like a turbo-virgin to me. I mean, he fights crime in a fursuit! Come on!”

Tim: “I have it on reasonable authority that Batman fucks. Unfortunately.”

Steph: “Hey, Damian. Penny for your thoughts?”

[tassjis]

Frat Kid Brad Wayne

[glumshoe]

Brad: “Bro do you remember what Robin used to wear, back when we were kids? With like, those little feathery booty shorts?”

Dick: “Scaled. Not feathery. He wore an armored leotard.”

Brad: “Nah, man, they were totally feathery! ‘Cause robins have feathers. I never really understood that—why would Batman’s sidekick be themed after a songbird? Robins aren’t scary. They don’t fight crime, and they don’t come out at night. Why not ‘Batboy’ or ‘Owlkid’ or something?”

Dick: “I’m pretty sure Robin’s schtick was based off Robin Hood the outlaw, not the bird. That’s why he wore green, and had a uniform cleverly blending medieval costumery with, uh, acrobatic attire.”

Brad: “Whatever. I’m just saying, it was weird.”

Dick: “Not really? Look up classic strongman costumes and historical illustrations of Robin Hood. Or Google Jules Leotard.”

Brad: “But the bare legs! The pixie boots! Why would Batman let him wear that? It’s creepy.”

Dick: “It wasn’t! Look. It was a different time. In context, that costume was obviously heroic. Besides, he was a little kid. I’m sure he’d wear something different now.”

Jason: “Yeah, but didn’t he keep wearing the short pants until he was old enough to vote? I’m pretty sure I remember that Robin wearing the pixie boots through college... he must have spent a fortune getting his legs waxed. I think I’d die before I’d do that.”

Dick: “This is Gotham. People do weirder things all the time.”

Brad: “Haven’t there been a lot of Robins? What happens to them? Do they die and Batman just hopes no one will notice when they’re replaced?”

Dick: “I—”

Jason: “I think that’s exactly what happens. He’s probably got a whole cellar full of dead Robins.”

[batfam-bro]

What do you think would happen when he saw Jason's gun collection? Cause Brad would at some point want to see where his adult siblings live and Jason probably just leaves his guns on whatever surface is clean. I wouldn't be surprised if there's one in the fridge from when he went to get a beer last night. And Brad already suspicious just opens up the fridge and there's a loaded gun and maybe a granade just staring at him when he goes to grab Jason a beer.

[glumshoe]

Honestly? I doubt he’d think much of it. He’d probably assume Jason was some kind of stockpiler with an extreme paranoid political bent, which are all too common, and suggest that he get a gun locker or twenty for safety—imagine if Damian were to come over, and there were unsecured guns, just think! You hear sad stories about little kids finding guns and playing with them all the time.

[down-sizing-redux]

"Look, bro, I'm all for your second amendment rights. My LB in TKE wound up leading the campus conservative club, and we still hang. But, like, I worry about Damien and Tim, y'know? Shit happens when kids clown around."

[nitghowl1600]

Brad is my new favorite batkid everyone else can leave.

[glumshoe]

Brad, wandering out of the shower: “Wassup, T-man? You lose a fight to poison ivy or something?”

Tim, frozen in surprise: “H-how did... how did you know?”

Brad: “I’d know those blisters anywhere! My roommate freshman year had to go on steroids, he got it so bad. All over his ass. Almost got him kicked off the team ‘cause no one believed him until he dropped trou right on the field. Ever tried Tecnu Gel?”

[yjbatfamandmarchingband-deactiv]

Brad comes to Wayne Manor hungover and sees the grandfather clock sliding back into place. Does he think anything of it? No, he’s probably still a little drunk.

The next day, he tells Jason and Tim how FUCKED UP he got last night and he thought he saw it he clock in the hall move. It’s chill though, bro. Hey, if any of his siblings ever get really drunk and need a ride home, he’ll be there. (Jason and Tim are exchanging HORRIFIED glances).

[captainlordauditor]

Okay, I have a very important question about Brad Wayne: Does he know Jason died? What’s he think of this?

[henryscavills]

[queenwhiskey]

What food group is honey what the fuck is this stuff

[violetvappy-deactivated20220306]

Apparently its categorized as raw meat by the FDA, which is cursed information if I’ve ever seen it.

[queenwhiskey]

WHAT

[rakunrat]

October 31st

Rip James and Lily Potter who on this day 36 years ago crashed their car into a crocodile which ate them and then took out a knife and gave harry this scar