
if i look back, i am lost
$LAYYYTER
Sweet Seals For You, Always
🪼
No title available
One Nice Bug Per Day
YOU ARE THE REASON

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

izzy's playlists!
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
todays bird
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
will byers stan first human second
d e v o n
noise dept.
Peter Solarz
Cosimo Galluzzi
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

tannertan36

No title available
seen from United States
seen from TĂĽrkiye

seen from TĂĽrkiye
seen from France

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Brazil

seen from United States

seen from Brazil
seen from United States

seen from United Kingdom

seen from United States

seen from Brazil

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Lebanon
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
@teethstatic
wagagahagag
mentally eel
mental eelness
when your mood is getting better, but you then you miss one (1) therapy session
“expectation”
an experience so overwhelming / unexpected / like the drop in you stomach on a roller coaster / like the seeds in a jalapeño /this is what it’s like
scitter through the maze / adrenaline pumping, despite no visable threat / weave between the walls like a frightened rabbit /scream forwards, find the way out
imagine waking up / and the world is not quite right / like a blockbuster movie, a hypothetical apocalypse / but only for you
every smile is genuine, yet stilted / your name doesn’t sound right in their mouths / the street lights beam in the wrong frequency
there is no real danger / but how terrifying a place to be / normalcy vanished from beneath you / no recognition outside of your own mind that something is wrong
every conversation is a slippery obstacle course / turns of phrase that don’t make sense / jokes that don’t land, questions rhetorical answered proposed not for quite that answer
it would be comical if it weren’t so mortifying
what’s happening? where is the world that should be? the axis has been tilted, the months shifted slightly to the left
“explain it,” they say, “what is so strange?”
but how could i answer? “the light bends around your face wrong,” i say, “you talk so strange. it’s like everyone has read a rulebook on how to function here except me.”
was there a meeting i missed? is this all some orchestrated joke? an alien the size of a chihuahua, introduced as human. i am shaking and yipping and people look at me like this is strange.
the stars keep spinning. the traffic keeps flowing.
“positive re-enforcement”
every moment tastes of bile / head titled down into the drain / slick and burning, dripping out my nostrils
in a way, the weak, fizzy feeling in my arms and behind my eyes is comfort, but a kind of comfort so deeply based in despair that it cannot be felt as a good thing.
a crumb is not made sweeter if it is larger than the last— not when you are starving.
these tiny necessities cannot feel of luxury when every meaty organ is being weened apart, your insides fueling you from the inside.
outside of the animal brain, the morsel only pains you— reminds you that you are being tortured;
a sunrise can only be wholly beautiful when it is not the herald of continuation of horror
audio
maladaptive daydreaming. recognition of The Self through the other. self-isolation that both prevents and enables self-actualization. a playlist titled “animatic material” that is actually just songs to trigger daydreams into worlds where i am understood and loved completely.
audio :)
audio
when Will Wood said
🎶 “...too weird to love, too scared to die, too alien to take you home / horrified at the sight of my reflection in your eyes, i don’t belong there / well it’s your conclusions that make mine delusions, so i make you sane / you can thank me later...” 🎶