°•Tekito the Magpie•°

may we live fast, smoke grass, and eat ass, amen. 𖨆any pronouns𖨆

[tekitothemagpie]

Dean's life in a meme.

The full pic + ref.

[crabussy]

-> listening to a jaunty country style song -> hear the lyrics wrong -> pause. frown. go back a few seconds to relisten -> hears the same fucked up lyrics -> check the actual lyrics to see what it ACTUALLY says

-> oh!

[tekitothemagpie]

I watched the scene and immediately thought of this.

|| S15 EP10

[dogpuppy]

[nineteenyearoldmeblog]

im fucking crying

[obsidianpegasus-deactivated2025]

All Fandoms Need These Reminders

It’s that simple.

[withgreatpowercomesmyfuckingdick]

and if anyone goes “Why? Why should I listen to this? Why SHOULDN’T I do this?”

The answers are easy and as follows:

1. People who write things you don’t like aren’t hurting you.

2. People who write online don’t owe you anything.

3. Things you don’t like will continue to exist whether you like it or not

Stop being a child and just scroll

[luckyladylily]

So the thing is boobs really do be jiggling. If having breasts has taught me anything it is that the ladies frolic. I don't even have that large of boobs but every time I go down some stairs all I can think about is that stupid quote about boobing breastily down the stairs or whatever it is because God Damn.

But anime and video game boob jiggling is like. The most uncanny valley shit I've ever seen nine times out of ten. You would think people this horny about tits would have actually looked at some but I guess not.

What we really need is some pervert to compile the ultimate visual guide to boob bouncing physics that's just like 500 hours of meticulously organized videos of breasts of different size and shape and under different fabrics bouncing around from a wide variety of physical movements so horny game devs can finally get it right and I don't have to be creeped out by women who appear to have surgically implanted softballs in their chest under skin made of rubber bands.

[cungadero]

i hate viruses so fucking much. literally getting attacked by a fucking shape. a concept. consumes no energy. responds to no stimuli. its only existence is to fuck with you. like fuck offf

[thrice-the-nobling]

prev's tags are too good not to save

[paverics]

“my father is a boy and my mother is a girl so i’m mixed” is the funniest possible response to someone asking your gender and it came from 6’5 Viking footballer and notable weird little guy Erling Haaland on a Snapchat

[paverics]

comedians can only dream of writing something this funny

[imsobadatnicknames2]

I know I already made a post to this effect but it's so baffling to me when someone defends the fact that headphone jacks are slowly but surely getting phased out by smartphone manufacturers with some variations of "wireless headphones are more convenient anyway" bc like. If we're talking about convenience what I like about wired headphones is that they conveniently have a single plug that makes the same damn pair of headphones universally compatible with every single audio-output-capable device I own, from my phone and my computer to my fucking gameboy and my casette player, it doesn't get any more convenient than that.

[fuck-customers]

[dogpuppy]

[dogglegog]

dominant things you can say during sex

i didnt hear what you said

hold on i need to blow my nose

wow

i feel kind of nauseous

is this anything

i don't know

this kind of reminds me of that one song

we can probably ignore that noise if you want to

why is my sock wet

it smells bad in here

that was weird

where are my glasses

ow

this is normal

sorry

just 2 chill people chilling

this is cool

can you say that again

are we good

youre actually naked

[escuerzoresucitado]

[bakersfield-row]

I’m going to have a fucking breakdown

[germaerobics]

HAAAANK! NO HANK!! THAT'S NOT A BACTERIOPHAGE! THOSE WOULD BE WAY SMALLER THAN A TARDIGRADE! THAT'S A RADIOLARIAN, A TYPE OF UNICELLULAR EUKARYOTIC ORGANISM KNOWN FOR ITS ELABORATE MINERAL SKELETONS! HAAAANK! THAT'S THE WRONG MICROBE!!!

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[loth-catgirl]

now that's a friend indeed

[cipheramnesia]

"Ignore the long Elmo" no I don't think I will

[hiveswap]

Heartbreaking: the worst type of person you know made an excellent point

[yb-cringe]

[kink-tomato]

This zine, and I cannot over emphasize how funny this is, is for Anne Rice’s Interview with the Vampire

[getvalentined]

These people blocked me on both Twitter and Tumblr, and then someone used a burner account to go off on me on Twitter. This person insisted that I was singlehandedly responsible for the project falling.

I made one comment, and it was this:

No clue how my single comment did this. But okay.

[undeadhousewife]

[mekdies]

Nobody is coming to save you.